Season 2 Discussion

[Kangatush]

6 hours ago, doyouevengohere said:

Ricky is shopping for a step mom.  The new girl is so much prettier than Melissa.

Ricky is shopping for a penis cover.  

[Drogo]

Darcey and Jesse reach a breaking point; Angela makes an unpleasant discovery in Nigeria; Jon defends his criminal past to Rachel's dad; Ricky has some questions for Ximena; Paul waits for Karine at the altar; and Tarik tries to make things good with Hazel.

[sasha206]

18 hours ago, kewpiedolls said:

The harsh comments about Hazel's appearance disturb me, especially the ones about her nose. A lot of Filipino women have flatter, wider noses. Sorry. I didn't know that having a pointy nose was somehow better.

Admittedly, I missed the comments on her appearance and I shouldn't speak for everyone but I think often the reason people comment (including me) on the looks of the intendeds is because the Americans are always talking about them like they are the hottest on the planet and in most cases, they aren't that great looking.  And often I'm confused at how these people can't find someone of the same caliber in the US.  (With the exception of Nicoles and Danielles who would not be getting men with washboard abs in the US).  So when Hazel was described as a "Angelina Jolie" look alike, I think we're all like what?!  

[Drogo]

Jesse's trip to America comes to an end; Karine and Paul continue to bicker; single mom Marta plans a trip to Algeria; Rachel learns more about Jon's dating history; Angela's frustration with Michael boils over; Ricky reveals all.

[Mothra]

13 hours ago, BradandJanet said:

My father's mother did this, except she dropped my two-year-old father and his four-year-old sister at an orphanage during WWI. She was a young widow who needed to find a new husband to support the family. When she remarried a couple years later, she brought her children home. The same thing happened to a friend of mine in Germany in the 1950's. 

When my grandmother's mother died, her father left her and her sister with relatives "in the hills"--this is southern WV--for several years.  When he remarried, he brought the girls down to town to live with their new family, which owned a boarding house.  My grandmother and her little sister were taken out of school (second grade) and put to work cleaning, cooking and waiting table.  I have a photograph of her at this time, and the sad look on her face would break your heart.

Those were the Good Old Days in the US.  I can't imagine that things are much better for a Filipino child today whose mother is too poor to be able to care for him.  The little boy is probably a thousand times better off with his father's family. 

Edited September 6, 2018 by Drogo
Removed quote box per user request.

[Mainer]

nobody has mentioned the Spanish rice flavor and how you can add tomatoes! Wow I’m gonna be buying a bunch of them this week! 

Rice ahhhh roni the  San Francisco treat !! 

Edited September 6, 2018 by Mainer

[Mainer]

39 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

Ricky is shopping for a penis cover

Eww I just threw up in my mouth a little

[sasha206]

10 hours ago, champsdelavande said:

Why. 

OMG, this outfit is straight out of my high school circa 85!

[poeticlicensed]

7 hours ago, doyouevengohere said:

Dean was very possibly drunk before Hazel and Tater ever came downstairs.  I don't blame him for having questions , but I do blame him for acting like an ass.  There's a time, place, and mode of delivery for sensitive subject matter like people's kids. 

I know that TLC drives some of this, but why the hell do friends and family members of the idiots feel entitled to question/mock/berate and go off in public to the person's face? This season it's Tarik's brother. They swoop in like captain save-a-ho and feel this righteous indignation on behalf of the person and the US.  

[Drogo]

40 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

OMG, this outfit is straight out of my high school circa 85!

Girl, you know it's true.

[Mothra]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

Admittedly, I missed the comments on her appearance and I shouldn't speak for everyone but I think often the reason people comment (including me) on the looks of the intendeds is because the Americans are always talking about them like they are the hottest on the planet and in most cases, they aren't that great looking.  And often I'm confused at how these people can't find someone of the same caliber in the US.  (With the exception of Nicoles and Danielles who would not be getting men with washboard abs in the US).  So when Hazel was described as a "Angelina Jolie" look alike, I think we're all like what?!  

Are you asking why the Americans can't find someone who looks like their foreign fiances in the US?  C'mon--you're kidding, right?  These Americans are at best not ugly.  There are a few who are imo attractive (Rachel I think is pretty, but then she has two children, making it harder for her to date I'm guessing), but mostly they are if not ordinary or worse looking, they have weird or outright repellent  personalities.  If they meet someone in the US, they're going to be exposed for the creepiness they are; if they are carrying on online, number one they can send photos that are flattering (or filtered) to make them look better (although as I say I think Rachel is pretty, she's not as pretty as she is in the pictures she sent Jon), or that don't show how fat they are.  Number two, they can control what they reveal of their personalities/hygiene/hobbies/obsessions and write and rewrite their messages.  None of this is possible in face-to-face courting.  And when they do court in this country via internet, well, there's this show on MTV called Catfish that explains how that works.

I think Hazel is being compared to Angelina Jolie strictly on account of her full lips.

[Frozendiva]

9 hours ago, Horrified said:

Yup - I've stayed in a number of ABnBs and the kitchenware and cookware is a dollar store chipped and dented nightmare.  

I found out why when I had a housesitter myself.  She totally wrecked a $200 non-stick pan by using a FORK to stir fry her food.  So I totally get the AirBnB folk only stocking crap.

That being said, maybe Jesse could have considered broiling that meat instead of steeping it.

Since they spent a lot of money at the butcher, they could have stopped to Homesense/Homegoods/Marshalls to pick up a better frying pan. Or back to Darcey's place to pick up one of her frying pans.

[sasha206]

5 minutes ago, Mothra said:

Are you asking why the Americans can't find someone who looks like their foreign fiances in the US?  C'mon--you're kidding, right?  These Americans are at best not ugly.  There are a few who are imo attractive (Rachel I think is pretty, but then she has two children, making it harder for her to date I'm guessing), but mostly they are if not ordinary or worse looking, they have weird or outright repellent  personalities.  If they meet someone in the US, they're going to be exposed for the creepiness they are; if they are carrying on online, number one they can send photos that are flattering (or filtered) to make them look better (although as I say I think Rachel is pretty, she's not as pretty as she is in the pictures she sent Jon), or that don't show how fat they are.  Number two, they can control what they reveal of their personalities/hygiene/hobbies/obsessions and write and rewrite their messages.  None of this is possible in face-to-face courting.  And when they do court in this country via internet, well, there's this show on MTV called Catfish that explains how that works.

I think Hazel is being compared to Angelina Jolie strictly on account of her full lips.

I hear you about controlling the narrative of what they reveal about their personas.

For me, I'm always dumbstruck when someone like Molly, who is actually an attractive but overweight woman, brings over someone like Luis who is not attractive in the slightest bit.  She couldn't find someone like Luis here?  

Of course, I think the big reason MOST of the Americans go overseas is to have someone they can control b/c they can dangle the green card.   But holy fuck, if I was spending that kind of cash, I'd want someone much better looking than those they bring back home!  Most of the 90 day fiances aren't all that attractive!

[renatae]

22 hours ago, Lily247 said:

I dont think she has to give any reason at all in not wanting to have sex with a man she had just net physically for the first time.

True, but I never said nor implied that she did. I merely stated the reason she gave was plausible, not necessarily untrue nor hypocritical.

[Azanscrazyhair]

26 minutes ago, Drogo said:

Girl, you know it's true.

Ooh ooh ooh, I love you

[Lily247]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

I hear you about controlling the narrative of what they reveal about their personas.

For me, I'm always dumbstruck when someone like Molly, who is actually an attractive but overweight woman, brings over someone like Luis who is not attractive in the slightest bit.  She couldn't find someone like Luis here?  

 

Who says the American luis type would want her though?

I think that Darcey is the only attractive cougar to have been on this show. I know I'm in the minority but I find her endearing, even her voice.

[Mainer]

2 hours ago, sasha206 said:

12 hours ago, champsdelavande said:

OMG, this outfit is straight out of my high school circa 85!

It doesn’t even match? if you were to wear a tank top under a shirt like that, which I think is more of a girl thing, never seen a guy do it. But either way you don’t pick the “Hanes your way”out of a 4 pack from Walmart tank top... it’s ribbed looks completely stuuuupid. ?

most black men have really good style, I’ve seen some impressive put together outfits on Black men that I was like wow! They match the shoes with the hat bring it together with the color of their shirt etc..

where did this moron come from??

Edited September 6, 2018 by Mainer

[eatsleep]

18 hours ago, Mothra said:

There seems to be an assumption that Hazel's parents don't work and could therefore care for a child.  I'm not sure that's true.  I think anyone so deep in poverty would be out every day trying to find something to get paid for.

And of course poverty isn't a ticket to a green card.  Hazel isn't asking for charity, though; she's apparently willing to wed (and bed) Tardis (thank you Drogo), which I think is a pretty high price to pay.  Her desire to improve her life--and we know from past episodes that she would be sending money back to her parents, so to improve their life as well, not to mention the son she hopes to bring with her to the US--makes her kind of a heroine to me.  Her desperation showed most, I think, when she was so concerned that Tardis had hooked up with his old girlfriend en route.  She's willing to sacrifice all that she has--which isn't much, granted, but it's hers--to try to help her family and herself.

 

I'm making no assumption about who works and who doesn't and for what reasons. I'm simply saying there are at least THREE ADULTS living in a household where the little boy should be. And amongst the three of them, no one can figure out a way to keep him there? One person couldn't work "second shift" (i.e., some time other than when the others are working)? Hazel can't pick up a second job when either of her parents is home, for some extra cash? There's no local woman in the area who watches kids for all of the hundreds of other poor working parents in the area? Does Hazel visit her son? Does she send money to support him? Did she just pawn him off bc her recent boyfriend didn't want him around? Does she want him back? Does she want more kids?

Everybody there is poor! But not every woman sends her kid to live somewhere else.

My point is that tarik needs to know this. If she's a neglectful mother or a deadbeat, he needs to know before bringing her to the US, at great cost to him and his own daughter. You can't bring just anybody into your home w/ your children, no matter how, pretty, poor, pitiful, tragic, whatever. So I say, drill away! i'd just rather tarik drill her for answers and not dean. 

No, she's not asking for charity. But without the love and attraction, it's prostitution. I'm not going to romanticize it, like some of you will. 

[eatsleep]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

 

For me, I'm always dumbstruck when someone like Molly, who is actually an attractive but overweight woman, brings over someone like Luis who is not attractive in the slightest bit.  She couldn't find someone like Luis here?  

 

I wouldn't want him but I'm sure lots of women find Luis very attractive. But his main appeal was probably his mouth piece (charm, charisma, silver tongue).

[Mainer]

8 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

There seems to be an assumption that Hazel's parents don't work and could therefore care for a child.  I'm not sure that's true.  I think anyone so deep in poverty would be out every day trying to find something to get paid for.

And of course poverty isn't a ticket to a green card.  Hazel isn't asking for charity, though; she's apparently willing to wed (and bed) Tardis (thank you Drogo), which I think is a pretty high price to pay.  Her desire to improve her life--and we know from past episodes that she would be sending money back to her parents, so to improve their life as well, not to mention the son she hopes to bring with her to the US--makes her kind of a heroine to me.  Her desperation showed most, I think, when she was so concerned that Tardis had hooked up with his old girlfriend en route.  She's willing to sacrifice all that she has--which isn't much, granted, but it's hers--to try to help her family and herself.

I agree. And I think by the looks there so poor they don’t even have a livingroom, they had Tarik sit on a bed with them, with a hello kitty comforter which would not be what an adult would pick which also shows the poverty and that’s probably they only bedroom in the house, they might now even have enough room for hazel which is why she’s living with her cousin. I think she’s in a hard spot and dirt poor if she had options she would use them. I’m sure she thought of every which way to keep her son and there wasn’t any... of her parents can’t even house her how could they House a child... 

[Mothra]

18 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

I'm making no assumption about who works and who doesn't and for what reasons. I'm simply saying there are at least THREE ADULTS living in a household where the little boy should be. And amongst the three of them, no one can figure out a way to keep him there? One person couldn't work "second shift" (i.e., some time other than when the others are working)? Hazel can't pick up a second job when either of her parents is home, for some extra cash? There's no local woman in the area who watches kids for all of the hundreds of other poor working parents in the area? Does Hazel visit her son? Does she send money to support him? Did she just pawn him off bc her recent boyfriend didn't want him around? Does she want him back? Does she want more kids?

Everybody there is poor! But not every woman sends her kid to live somewhere else.

My point is that tarik needs to know this. If she's a neglectful mother or a deadbeat, he needs to know before bringing her to the US, at great cost to him and his own daughter. You can't bring just anybody into your home w/ your children, no matter how, pretty, poor, pitiful, tragic, whatever. So I say, drill away! i'd just rather tarik drill her for answers and not dean. 

No, she's not asking for charity. But without the love and attraction, it's prostitution. I'm not going to romanticize it, like some of you will. 

With respect, one of us has a strange idea of what life is like for Hazel and her parents.  I certainly have no more reason to assert my view, but just from what we've seen, it's hard for me to imagine Hazel's parents moving in yet another person, no matter how small, into that room they live in.  Others have posted that Hazel doesn't live there, that she lives with her cousin, so if there's room wherever it is Hazel lives, that's another story.  But then how would the grandparents be there for the child?  I don't know how much money Hazel makes, but she seems desperate to me, and I wonder whether she or her parents could afford to pay someone to watch the little boy, and I wonder if that kind of paid child-care would be tolerated in family-centric  Philippines.  I don't know.  But I have the feeling that while I'm probably exaggerating the despair of Hazel's life in the Philippines, you might be seeing her life as more similar to life in the US, where it's fairly easy to get someone to help out with childcare, than it is.  I'm not betting on either of us having the truth in this case, and I think we're just going to have to disagree about it.

I agree that Tardis needs to know about the son.  Hazel needs to know about Tardis' daughter.  Fair is fair.  Hazel needs to know more about Tardis' daughter, in all fairness, than Tardis needs to know about her son.  IMO.  Unless Hazel's son also has special needs and may require a lifetime of support from his parents.  They both should know exactly what their family situation might look like if they get married.

I disagree that anyone needs to "drill" Hazel (or Tardis) for answers.  In reality, there's a lot of stuff that ought to have been discussed and settled before they met in person, which adds fuel to my belief that Tardis' goal is pussy, which he wants to call love.  Tardis is right; Dean should not have come to the Philippines, at least not until Tardis and Hazel had talked about *everything*.  Tardis and Hazel are living together, they speak the same language, they claim to care about each other.  People who live together, speak the same language and care about each other have meaningful conversations about their united future, not about when she's going to give it up to him.  It seems to me that Tardis has not taken advantage of his time alone with Hazel to ask the questions he should have asked, which makes me wonder how important the answers are to him.  I firmly believe his interest in her is sexual and nothing but sexual.  He will probably treat her well, and she will probably please him in any way she can.  But there's no love here on either side.  IMO.

As for the situation being prostitution.  Well, how many poor but beautiful young women have married, say, a personally repellent millionaire and produced children with him in the US?  Do you think a trophy wife is prostitution?  I kind of do.  It's not possible for us to know what's in a trophy wife's heart--maybe she does love him, even if she avoids his touch--and it's not possible for us to know what's in Hazel and Tardis' hearts, either.  All we can do is watch what we're shown and judge from that.  I guess by your definition Tardis/Hazel is prostitution, but as Pope Francis says, "who am I to judge?"  If I were Hazel and as desperate as I believe she is, wouldn't I do just as she is doing?  If anyone's behavior is shameful, imo, it's Tardis', who surely has more choices for happiness than Hazel does, but he chooses to go with a woman who even he isn't sure loves him.

Edited September 6, 2018 by Mothra

[charmed1]

I think it’s been an equal opportunity snark fest on the looks of all the participants on this show since the first season. The favorable Little Orphan Annie edit that Hazel has received does not preclude her. 

Whomever likened that Mormon kid to Hilary Swank is my hero. I laugh every time I think about him.

[eatsleep]

20 minutes ago, Mothra said:

With respect, one of us has a strange idea of what life is like for Hazel and her parents.  I certainly have no more reason to assert my view, but just from what we've seen, it's hard for me to imagine Hazel's parents moving in yet another person, no matter how small, into that room they live in.  Others have posted that Hazel doesn't live there, that she lives with her cousin, so if there's room wherever it is Hazel lives, that's another story.  But then how would the grandparents be there for the child?  I don't know how much money Hazel makes, but she seems desperate to me, and I wonder whether she or her parents could afford to pay someone to watch the little boy, and I wonder if that kind of paid child-care would be tolerated in family-centric  Philippines.  I don't know.  But I have the feeling that while I'm probably exaggerating the despair of Hazel's life in the Philippines, you might be seeing her life as more similar to life in the US, where it's fairly easy to get someone to help out with childcare, than it is.  I'm not betting on either of us having the truth in this case, and I think we're just going to have to disagree about it.

 

I really don't care, personally. I'm just saying someone needs to start talking. Less weeping and more explaining plz. 

 

21 minutes ago, Mothra said:

I agree that Tardis needs to know about the son.  Hazel needs to know about Tardis' daughter.  Fair is fair.  Hazel needs to know more about Tardis' daughter, in all fairness, than Tardis needs to know about her son.  IMO.  Unless Hazel's son also has special needs and may require a lifetime of support from his parents.  They both should know exactly what their family situation might look like if they get married.

No, Tarik has a greater need to know all of this nitty gritty bc he's taking on the financial and legal responsibility for all of them. And he is the one who actually is parenting and providing for his child so whatever he does for Hazel, he's taking away from his daughter. And frankly, tarik has nothing to prove in that respect; he's fulfilling his responsibility as a parent. Hazel isn't. So he doesn't have to convince her of anything related to his fitness as a parent. 

 

24 minutes ago, Mothra said:

It seems to me that Tardis has not taken advantage of his time alone with Hazel to ask the questions he should have asked, which makes me wonder how important the answers are to him.  I firmly believe his interest in her is sexual and nothing but sexual.  He will probably treat her well, and she will probably please him in any way she can.  But there's no love here on either side.  IMO.

Right, these questions need to be asked. That's why i'm not mad at dean, in spite of his brutish, overbearing manner. A lot of time and attention and financial resources stand to be taken away NEEDLESSLY from Tarik's little girl if Hazel is just some selfish ho on the come up.

 

28 minutes ago, Mothra said:

As for the situation being prostitution.  Well, how many poor but beautiful young women have married, say, a personally repellent millionaire and produced children with him in the US?  Do you think a trophy wife is prostitution?  

If there's no genuine affection and if she's just going along with it for financial gain, then YES, absolutely. 

And I get so annoyed when these American sponsors don't do their due diligence to vet their foreign SOs and bring them home to their already existing children, introducing a bunch of drama and instability into their children's lives. Yuck!!!

[Lily247]

49 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

I'm making no assumption about who works and who doesn't and for what reasons. I'm simply saying there are at least THREE ADULTS living in a household where the little boy should be. And amongst the three of them, no one can figure out a way to keep him there? One person couldn't work "second shift" (i.e., some time other than when the others are working)? Hazel can't pick up a second job when either of her parents is home, for some extra cash? There's no local woman in the area who watches kids for all of the hundreds of other poor working parents in the area? Does Hazel visit her son? Does she send money to support him? Did she just pawn him off bc her recent boyfriend didn't want him around? Does she want him back? Does she want more kids?

Everybody there is poor! But not every woman sends her kid to live somewhere else.

My point is that tarik needs to know this. If she's a neglectful mother or a deadbeat, he needs to know before bringing her to the US, at great cost to him and his own daughter. You can't bring just anybody into your home w/ your children, no matter how, pretty, poor, pitiful, tragic, whatever. So I say, drill away! i'd just rather tarik drill her for answers and not dean. 

No, she's not asking for charity. But without the love and attraction, it's prostitution. I'm not going to romanticize it, like some of you will. 

Life in the Phillipines is very very different than in the US. I have been there once and was appalled at the level of poverty there that was unparalleled from any other country I had visited in Southeast Asia. Forget welfare or social programs. Plenty of mothers work abroad in the middle east and send money back home to their kids. Plus, hazel's parents apartment does not really look fit for a young child. What I dont like is Hazels openness at her true intentions with Tarik. 

[JenE4]

16 hours ago, Cementhead said:

Damn you Americans and your embarrassment of riches!!  Cilantro Lime, Pilaf, and Herb Butter Rice-a-Roni?  (I think I am even missing a few other flavours that were mentioned a few pages back.)  Do you know what us Canadians are offered?  Chicken or Beef.  pffft

Disclaimer:  No, I am not speaking on behalf of every Canadian everywhere in this vast country of ours, so to my fellow Canadians who can find, say,  the Pilaf variety on the shelf at their local Loblaws, enjoy! 

You can find a stooopid American to harvest the American Rice-A-Roni.

[PinkFlamingo]

I appreciate tardis but did I actually catch a torgo reference? Torgo as in "the master would not approve" torgo? 

I think that the issue over Jon's fighting past may be somewhat overshadowing what may be an even bigger deal breaker in the relationship: the womanizing. Because even if he grows out of fighting do womanizers ever grow out of that?

[Mothra]

@eatsleep, I  think we're just going to have to disagree about this.  I take your point that resources expended on Hazel's behalf must necessarily reduce the resources available to Arielle, and I join you in admiring Tardis' parenting of his daughter.  But I think to misrepresent to Hazel what her life would be like in the US by not explaining about his daughter is a real stain on Tardis' shining armor.  It's often difficult-to-impossible for mothers born in the US with experience in navigating social services and educational law to obtain for their children with autism what they need.  I can't imagine what it would be like for Hazel to have to fight for her step-daughter's rights under the ADA!  And what we saw of Arielle showed a loving, high-functioning, adorable child who really didn't seem to have anything "wrong" with her.  But if she has received a diagnosis of autism, life with her might be or become very difficult indeed and require sacrifices Hazel should be warned about before she signs up.

Many women working as nannies raising American children send money home to support their own children, whom they have left in their native lands.  Historically, women of color from the US have worked hard raising (and mothering and loving) little rich white children while their own children are left motherless.  Economic necessity is a hard mistress.  I'm 71, and I know people of my generation who were raised by nannies, who saw their parents only at the dinner table, and who never wondered about the nannies' children waiting at home to (hopefully) be tucked in by their own moms.  This isn't something that went on in the Dark Ages; it's happening now.

I respect these women, even while I feel their heartbreak.  I am sure that Hazel's first preference would be for her son to live with her--she finds it difficult to talk about him, even in TH, without tearing up.  I am sure you would feel the same, if there were some absolutely insurmountable obstacle to your having your child with you.  I think where we differ is in our understanding of how insurmountable--or not--Hazel's poverty is.  To say "I would never do that" is an invitation to the gods to show you yes you would do that, if the circumstances forced you to. 

Edited just for PinkFlamingo:

Edited September 6, 2018 by Mothra

[PinkFlamingo]

@Mothra yes! It is all of our shared love of all things terrible (worst TV, worst movie of all time) that brings us here!

[Kellyee]

Quote

And I get so annoyed when these American sponsors don't do their due diligence to vet their foreign SOs and bring them home to their already existing children, introducing a bunch of drama and instability into their children's lives. Yuck!!!

I know more about the cashier at my grocery store than some of these people know about the person they are buying an engagement ring for. Not to mention educating themselves about their new love's country, religion, and other beliefs. Its scary. Its really sad too how Ricky supposedly loved Melissa, but he replaced her in a minute when things went bad. That shows the mindset of some of these people.

[Raja]

1 hour ago, eatsleep said:

I'm making no assumption about who works and who doesn't and for what reasons. I'm simply saying there are at least THREE ADULTS living in a household where the little boy should be. And amongst the three of them, no one can figure out a way to keep him there? One person couldn't work "second shift" (i.e., some time other than when the others are working)? Hazel can't pick up a second job when either of her parents is home, for some extra cash? There's no local woman in the area who watches kids for all of the hundreds of other poor working parents in the area? Does Hazel visit her son? Does she send money to support him? Did she just pawn him off bc her recent boyfriend didn't want him around? Does she want him back? Does she want more kids?

Everybody there is poor! But not every woman sends her kid to live somewhere else.

My point is that tarik needs to know this. If she's a neglectful mother or a deadbeat, he needs to know before bringing her to the US, at great cost to him and his own daughter. You can't bring just anybody into your home w/ your children, no matter how, pretty, poor, pitiful, tragic, whatever. So I say, drill away! i'd just rather tarik drill her for answers and not dean. 

No, she's not asking for charity. But without the love and attraction, it's prostitution. I'm not going to romanticize it, like some of you will. 

You are coming with an American cultural prejudice favoring the mother must be the primary care giver. The Filipino cultural prejudice is to give the child the greatest advantage. If that means mom takes the chance of being a maid in Arabia or Hong Kong or just that dad's family raises the kids then that is the normal choice a Pinoy takes.

[AZChristian]

3 minutes ago, Kellyee said:

That shows the mindset of some of these people.

I doubt that's the part of the body controlling decisions in most of these cases.  

[Horrified]

Hazel doesn't live with her parents!!!!  See episode one.  No sense in punishing her for "why can't she figure out a way for her son to live with her and her parents?".

If the tables were turned and Hazel was a Howard, would anyone dump on him because his child lived with the other parent?

Hazel explained in the first ep. that she felt the father could provide a better life for her son.  Reasonable explanation.  Why is she being persecuted for that?  She didn't abandon the kid on the side of the road.

BILLIONS of people marry for financial security.  Its a thing and its okay.  

[KateHearts]

17 hours ago, Stacee said:

I think Hazel is beautiful. I love her features. Nose, lips, hair, she's pretty.  It's clear she is not at all attracted to Tariq. She's young and if she liked him shed be all over him. She sees him as a ticket out of the slum she lives in. She can do wayyy better. Tariq is a typical male that sees a young pretty woman. She's clearly leading him by the nose here.

I think Hazel is being cautious. She has been straightforward about wanting to meet someone to help her improve her financial status and care for her son. Just because she didn't jump his bones doesn't mean she isn't attracted. He came on a little strong and she doesn't know the guy.  Funny how this conclusion is drawn regarding Hazel yet when Ricky's #2 squeeze wants to sleep together after 5 minutes, she comes under scrutiny as well.

Edited September 6, 2018 by KateHearts

[Scarlett45]

14 minutes ago, Raja said:

You are coming with an American cultural prejudice favoring the mother must be the primary care giver. The Filipino cultural prejudice is to give the child the greatest advantage. If that means mom takes the chance of being a maid in Arabia or Hong Kong or just that dad's family raises the kids then that is the normal choice a Pinoy takes.

Yup. 

12 minutes ago, Horrified said:

Hazel doesn't live with her parents!!!!  See episode one.  No sense in punishing her for "why can't she figure out a way for her son to live with her and her parents?".

If the tables were turned and Hazel was a Howard, would anyone dump on him because his child lived with the other parent?

Hazel explained in the first ep. that she felt the father could provide a better life for her son.  Reasonable explanation.  Why is she being persecuted for that?  She didn't abandon the kid on the side of the road.

BILLIONS of people marry for financial security.  Its a thing and its okay.  

I agree. 

[iwasish]

2 hours ago, eatsleep said:

I wouldn't want him but I'm sure lots of women find Luis very attractive. But his main appeal was probably his mouth piece (charm, charisma, silver tongue).

Molly was drunk for most of her vacation,the booze and sex made Luis attractive.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

I think there is a bigger business opportunity that was not discussed at the AirB&B dinner table ( and no, it wasn't a mobile knife sharpening truck)

 

[eatsleep]

54 minutes ago, Raja said:

You are coming with an American cultural prejudice favoring the mother must be the primary care giver. The Filipino cultural prejudice is to give the child the greatest advantage. If that means mom takes the chance of being a maid in Arabia or Hong Kong or just that dad's family raises the kids then that is the normal choice a Pinoy takes.

I don't care who the child lives with. I have no prejudice. But Hazel is mentioning it in her THs as tho she is either sad about her decision or is using it to garner sympathy. OK, tell Tarik the full story so he can decide if you're the type of woman he wants around his child, and to be the mother of any of his future children. Quit trying to dance around the issue; it's a huge issue for a single parent.

Edited September 6, 2018 by eatsleep

[gingerella]

2 hours ago, Mainer said:

It doesn’t even match? if you were to wear a tank top under a shirt like that, which I think is more of a girl thing, never seen a guy do it. But either way you don’t pick the “Hanes your way”out of a 4 pack from Walmart tank top... it’s ribbed looks completely stuuuupid. ?

most black men have really good style, I’ve seen some impressive put together outfits on Black men that I was like wow! They match the shoes with the hat bring it together with the color of their shirt etc..

where did this moron come from??

It's ribbed for...her [viewing] pleasure...

1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

Life in the Phillipines is very very different than in the US. I have been there once and was appalled at the level of poverty there that was unparalleled from any other country I had visited in Southeast Asia. Forget welfare or social programs. Plenty of mothers work abroad in the middle east and send money back home to their kids. Plus, hazel's parents apartment does not really look fit for a young child. What I dont like is Hazels openness at her true intentions with Tarik. 

I happen to know a Filipino single mom - which is a rarity (or at least very in the closet and not spoken about) given the social and religious norms there, and she lives in the US, has a good, steady job with an upstanding Filipino company here. Her kids were living with their father in the Philippines until this summer. I'm not sure why, but now that she is established here, she sent for them and they arrived in June. What I do know is that she had to get a letter from the courts in Las Vegas, where she got her divorce, stating that she was the bio mom, and a lot of other documentation before the Philippine government would even allow those children to leave the country to be repatriated with their mom. The Philippines takes family court issues very, very seriously and is very strict about children leaving their home country without proper documentation. So it's not a walk in the part, or a given, that Hazel would be able to get her child out of the country if she does come to the US with TicTac.

7 hours ago, Kareem said:

I have to confess, I wrote to the Rice-A-Roni company not all that long ago asking why they discontinued their stroganoff offering.  It was deadly.  

I think you might find that their Chicken & Mushroom is very similar, and you can always dump some good parm into it et voila, it's Stroganoff!

[Kath94]

5 minutes ago, gingerella said:

It's ribbed for...her [viewing] pleasure...

Oh, GINGERELLA, I love you!

[Kangatush]

My friend is half Filipino.  Her dad was in the military, met her mom there, and they moved here.  Her sister is actually her cousin.  Because of the perceived much greater opportunities in America, her parents legally adopted her cousin so she could live in the states.  No abuse, or neglect, was happening, just poverty.  It was all about what was in the best interest of the child.  I don't judge Hazel for not having custody.  I'll judge her integrity until I know she's been clear with Tarik about her motives.  All her honesty so far has been during THs, not in conversations with him. 

Another reason Dean might have been so fierce with Hazel about her parenting skills is that he sees his brother raising a special needs daughter all alone, so presumably her mother has big character flaws and he wants to make sure his brother isn't just playing out the exact same scenario with another woman.  He still needed a better approach.

[RedBagWithMakeup]

7 hours ago, Drogo said:

The Live Chat has a new name (and a new purpose in life)...

Yassssss!

Rice-A-Roni party on Sunday! Feel free to eat along with a plate of snails. Or steak, make sure you cut on the bias!

[eatsleep]

10 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

 

Another reason Dean might have been so fierce with Hazel about her parenting skills is that he sees his brother raising a special needs daughter all alone, so presumably her mother has big character flaws and he wants to make sure his brother isn't just playing out the exact same scenario with another woman.  

Yes, this exactly!

[KateHearts]

27 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

I don't care who the child lives with. I have no prejudice. But Hazel is mentioning it in her THs as tho she is either sad about her decision or is using it to garner sympathy. OK, tell Tarik the full story so he can decide if you're the type of woman he wants around his child, and to be the mother of any of his future children. Quit trying to dance around the issue; it's a huge issue for a single parent.

Yes, it is; and they are both single parents; it's a big sacrifice for both of them.  She needs to know that she could be expected to be "insta-mom" to a special needs child. Huge.

[doyouevengohere]

2 hours ago, PinkFlamingo said:

I appreciate tardis but did I actually catch a torgo reference? Torgo as in "the master would not approve" torgo? 

I think that the issue over Jon's fighting past may be somewhat overshadowing what may be an even bigger deal breaker in the relationship: the womanizing. Because even if he grows out of fighting do womanizers ever grow out of that?

Yes, I called him Torgo and I shall continue to do so!  It just seems to fit him; hat and all!

[eatsleep]

6 minutes ago, KateHearts said:

Yes, it is; and they are both single parents; it's a big sacrifice for both of them.  She needs to know that she could be expected to be "insta-mom" to a special needs child. Huge.

Who said otherwise? I'm assuming they both know about each other's kids. Tariq has questions...and relatives not afraid to ask. Hazel doesn't seem to have any questions...or relatives interested in asking. The fact Hazel's not asking any questions could suggest she's in it only for the short term. At least Tarik is trying to fill in some blanks.

 

Not sure what kind of "sacrifice" it is for Hazel? She's ready to jump on the first thing smoking to the US. Whereas, Tarik is on the hook for 10 years for her and prbly her child, too. 

Edited September 6, 2018 by eatsleep

[Horrified]

1 hour ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

I think there is a bigger business opportunity that was not discussed at the AirB&B dinner table ( and no, it wasn't a mobile knife sharpening truck)

 

I think they should pitch their own show and call it "The Adventures of Rice and Roni".  Product placement Gold Jerry!!  Gold!

[usernameG]

12 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

Not sure what kind of "sacrifice" it is for Hazel? She's ready to jump on the first thing smoking to the US. Whereas, Tarik is on the hook for 10 years for her and prbly her child, too. 

Well she would be leaving her family, her sons family (assuming he comes) and everything she has known to come to the US for a better life. Some of the other people who have come over struggle with adjusting to the US and having no support system. 

I have been trying to follow this thread but also love how there is a totally different conversation going on around Rice A Roni, whats the best flavor etc LOL.

[kewpiedolls]

6 hours ago, sasha206 said:

Admittedly, I missed the comments on her appearance and I shouldn't speak for everyone but I think often the reason people comment (including me) on the looks of the intendeds is because the Americans are always talking about them like they are the hottest on the planet and in most cases, they aren't that great looking.  And often I'm confused at how these people can't find someone of the same caliber in the US.  (With the exception of Nicoles and Danielles who would not be getting men with washboard abs in the US).  So when Hazel was described as a "Angelina Jolie" look alike, I think we're all like what?!  

What bothered me is certain people going in on Hazel calling her straight up ugly and saying she has a "pug nose". It's not like Hazel was strutting around talking about how smoking hot she is. That was Tarik, so it's not her fault. I took the Angelina Jolie comment as a reference to them both having full lips, not that Hazel was her lookalike, but that's just my interpretation. I do get what you're saying, though.  Maybe I'm being sensitive so I'll stop commenting about it now, lol.

[sasha206]

2 minutes ago, kewpiedolls said:

What bothered me is certain people going in on Hazel calling her straight up ugly and saying she has a "pug nose". It's not like Hazel was strutting around talking about how smoking hot she is. That was Tarik, so it's not her fault. I took the Angelina Jolie comment as a reference to them both having full lips, not that Hazel was her lookalike, but that's just my interpretation. I do get what you're saying, though.  Maybe I'm being sensitive so I'll stop commenting about it now, lol.

Nah, you're just a very nice person!  Much nicer than me!  :) 

I know exactly what you mean though.  There are times when I'm commenting about someone's looks and think wow, I'm being a dick!

[gonecrackers]

I'm not sure how great a parent Tarik is that he dumped his special needs daughter on what we are assuming is a not so great, maybe, mother, just so he could go chase some poor ass (sorry Hazel but it is what it is) in another country for a couple of weeks, to possibly marry her & bring her home to be a 'mother' to the special needs daughter w/o even knowing her or her capabilities for such a huge responsibility.

And I'm questioning his claim that this is the 'longest he's ever left' his daughter given he was previously carrying on with someone in Thailand.

Hazel's son, although she misses him, was placed with the father simply because he could care for him better.

Tarik is the shitty parent IMO.