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Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality


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17 minutes ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I see this all the time...in fact, I just watched an episode of a show where it happened twice!

A person comes to the door of someone's house (bonus points if it is a large house).  They ring the doorbell and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they knock and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they open the door and walk right into the house saying, "Hello?  Anyone home?"

First of all, give it a good 20-30 seconds before re-ringing the doorbell or switching to knocking.  Secondly, don't just walk into someone's house.  I mean, who does that? (Besides burglars, of course...)

That's why my front door is always locked.  LOL

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I have to stealthily check to see who's at the door to know if I want to open it, and if I do, I have to put on pants. By then, they've left. I usually don't bother getting up to answer the door in the first place. The door is always locked and chained.

Very few people come to my place unannounced. If it's a delivery, I know it's coming. If it's family, they're in from out of town and I know they're coming. If it's anyone else, they're selling something and I'm not buying.

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I don't like the idolization of the tomboy on tv and film and prose. Hoping our female children will grow up to follow masculine ideals is not feminism. Plus implying that a tomboy is inherently superior to a girly girl is just false. 

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Just now, bilgistic said:

I'm cracking up! It's actually usually a huge t-shirt and my Fruit of the Looms. It's a good look.

Sorry, I had the image of you in camisole knickers like Nyssa was in that episode of Doctor Who...

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1 hour ago, JacquelineAppleton said:

I don't like the idolization of the tomboy on tv and film and prose. Hoping our female children will grow up to follow masculine ideals is not feminism. Plus implying that a tomboy is inherently superior to a girly girl is just false. 

I agree with this, and I also wish writers would realize that having a variety of practical skills isn't the same as being a tomboy.  Like, girly-girls might know how to work on cars, and tomboys might not know carpentry.

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5 hours ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I see this all the time...in fact, I just watched an episode of a show where it happened twice!

A person comes to the door of someone's house (bonus points if it is a large house).  They ring the doorbell and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they knock and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they open the door and walk right into the house saying, "Hello?  Anyone home?"

First of all, give it a good 20-30 seconds before re-ringing the doorbell or switching to knocking.  Secondly, don't just walk into someone's house.  I mean, who does that? (Besides burglars, of course...)

My aunt used to waltz right in, when I was younger. My mum started locking the door in the morning, because of that. She also tried to take over when she was visiting for Thanksgiving, after my mother died, which I knew she would do, and partly why I didn't want her here for long (she and an uncle were supposed to stay somewhere else - she would drive them both back here, because she wanted to stay here, even after I told her to leave, when she was rude to me - she knew my dad wouldn't tell her to go).

This reminds me: I've been meaning to lock my front door here, partly because I worry about someone just taking it upon themselves to walk in. So glad they don't. We have a dog, so that should discourage them a bit.

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I like these various TV shows where the presenter knocks at the door of someone who's been in the program, & they open the door..."On it's you". Ha, they've been setting up the shot for the last half hour, & that's probably take 10.


A former colleague of mine had to do this repeatedly, and he said he always felt like an absolute tit. It’s not just the feigned surprise, it’s the fact that they always answer the door immediately in a way that just never happens in real life unless you’re actually walking past the door when someone rings the bell.

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13 hours ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

Then they knock and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they open the door and walk right into the house saying, "Hello?  Anyone home?"

They do this even on shows set in large cities like LA and NYC and Chicago (i.e., most of the shows on TV) where NOBODY but NOBODY leaves their front door unlocked.  

Also there is always somebody down in the apartment lobby that will helpfully give the cops (or the bad guy) the apartment number of the person.  To a complete rando off the street.  

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Watching the new season of Schitt's Creek I was reminded of this one :

 

Random pregnancy tests are ALWAYS left just lying around in the top of crash cans for random people to find so there can we confusion about who is pregnant......with HILARIOUS consequences. 

And there has to be at least 3 or 4 vague conversations to figure out who is pregnant and what is happening. 

Its VERY hard to figure out who is actually pregnant.  You can't just ask anyone. 

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girl's outfits for school dances on kidcoms and teen sitcoms are a lot lower budget looking than real life. (e.g. Dorothy Jane Torkelson on the Disney Channel in the nineties).

Child beauty pageants on sitcoms and dramas are also obviously starved of cash as the girls wear mall-sold party dresses instead of sequined monstrosities, and the child beauty queens in sitcoms and dramas use their own hair instead of wigs.

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14 hours ago, HazelEyes4325 said:

I see this all the time...in fact, I just watched an episode of a show where it happened twice!

A person comes to the door of someone's house (bonus points if it is a large house).  They ring the doorbell and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they knock and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they open the door and walk right into the house saying, "Hello?  Anyone home?"

First of all, give it a good 20-30 seconds before re-ringing the doorbell or switching to knocking.  Secondly, don't just walk into someone's house.  I mean, who does that? (Besides burglars, of course...)

That actually happened to me one time. It was summer, so I jjust had the screen door closed.  I had been in the living room (where the door is), but I had gone into the bedroom to get something.  While in there, I heard a knock at the door and I headed out to answer.  Then I heard the door open and someone yell hello. I emerged to see a man I had never seen before.  I was kind of freaking out in my head.  But, I was like "can I help you?"  "Is so and so here?" "No, I don't know who that is."  He apologized and left. I'm sorry, but if you don't know someone well enough to know where they do or don't live, you don't know them well enough to just walk in.

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2 hours ago, Katy M said:

That actually happened to me one time. It was summer, so I jjust had the screen door closed.  I had been in the living room (where the door is), but I had gone into the bedroom to get something.  While in there, I heard a knock at the door and I headed out to answer.  Then I heard the door open and someone yell hello. I emerged to see a man I had never seen before.  I was kind of freaking out in my head.  But, I was like "can I help you?"  "Is so and so here?" "No, I don't know who that is."  He apologized and left. I'm sorry, but if you don't know someone well enough to know where they do or don't live, you don't know them well enough to just walk in.

That reminds me of when we lived in a tiny apartment, that was the corner of a large house. It had a kitchen, small bathroom, small bedroom, and my parents slept on a mattress in the living room. The guy downstairs was drunk a lot, and kind of creepy - he offered to take me, and/or my sister to the movies, and said something like, "I'm harmless". Yeah. I was in the bath, late one night, and heard something at the front door, which was about a foot away from the bathroom door. He was using his credit card to try to open the door. I woke my dad up, and he sent him away. 

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4 hours ago, DrSpaceman73 said:

Random pregnancy tests are ALWAYS left just lying around in the top of crash cans for random people to find so there can we confusion about who is pregnant......with HILARIOUS consequences. 

And there has to be at least 3 or 4 vague conversations to figure out who is pregnant and what is happening. 

Its VERY hard to figure out who is actually pregnant.  You can't just ask anyone. 

And why does the person who uses the pregnancy test leave it on the top? If you don't want others to know wrap it in a bag or paper towel and shove it to the bottom. Take it out to the big trash, whatever - hiding stuff is pretty easy!

I've seriously considered putting a sign on my door that says "If I don't know you personally, don't bother knocking. I WILL NOT ANSWER!" These kids with their clipboards (trying to get money for a cause, email addresses, etc) they will stand out there and knock over and over again. I would think they could see how small my house is and know that if I don't answer in about 5 seconds, I'm not answering at all.

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12 minutes ago, Nordly Beaumont said:

I would think they could see how small my house is and know that if I don't answer in about 5 seconds, I'm not answering at all.

Maybe they think you're in the shower.

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15 hours ago, JacquelineAppleton said:

I like these various TV shows where the presenter knocks at the door of someone who's been in the program, & they open the door..."On it's you". Ha, they've been setting up the shot for the last half hour, & that's probably take 10.


A former colleague of mine had to do this repeatedly, and he said he always felt like an absolute tit. It’s not just the feigned surprise, it’s the fact that they always answer the door immediately in a way that just never happens in real life unless you’re actually walking past the door when someone rings the bell.

Not to mention that they shoot it from a camera that's already inside the house.

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Watching Elementary made think of this police consultants or PIs whether they are Holmes or pretending to be psychics or anyone else. Regularly break into people's homes and businesses to get information, look around for clues and evidences so they later can bring the police to "find". Even though that is illegal which is either ignored or not questioned. On the rare times it comes up they pretend the doors were unlocked or open, or thought they heard someone or a baby until they made it all the way inside. What's amazing asided from that being believed and not arrested and hauled off to jail is somehow despite all the cameras throughout the cities and neighborhoods there is never a single one that captures them breaking into the house or apartment or business. Even if its possibly they override the cameras at that house or apartment, what about all the others at nearby houses or apartments? On the news or various crime shows people are caught all the time breaking into the homes and other places if not by cameras there then other houses and street cams. Even in the shows where they some how can always find cameras, cameras always managing to capture licenses plates, and so in depth they see where the criminals is. There's not a single one of consultants or PIs caught on tape breaking in.

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On 10/19/2018 at 3:58 AM, ratgirlagogo said:

They do this even on shows set in large cities like LA and NYC and Chicago (i.e., most of the shows on TV) where NOBODY but NOBODY leaves their front door unlocked.  

Also there is always somebody down in the apartment lobby that will helpfully give the cops (or the bad guy) the apartment number of the person.  To a complete rando off the street.  

I'm always surprised people on TV know anyone's apartment number in the first place.  I've never known my neighbors' apartment numbers.  I just know they live "over there."  I never even know my friends' apartment numbers, after the first time I find it and learn where it is.

For that matter, I don't know people's addresses by heart.  People on TV are always like, "I'll give you their address" and immediately write it down on a notepad.

Edited by janie jones
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33 minutes ago, janie jones said:

I'm always surprised people on TV know anyone's apartment number in the first place.  I've never known my neighbor's apartment numbers.  I just know they live "over there."  I never even know my friends' apartment numbers, after the first time I find it and learn where it is.

For that matter, I don't know people's addresses by heart.  People on TV are always like, "I'll give you their address" and immediately write it down on a notepad.

that reminds me of Growing Pains when Boner joined the army (or the marines I forget which).  He told Mike he would write to him and then asked him where he lived. They were in the Seaver driveway so MIke says "Here."  And Boner says "Yeah, but what's your address?  I've never had to write to you before."   "Yeah, you'd just always call or come over." Such a simple little scene, yet it made me tear up at the time.  

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3 hours ago, janie jones said:

I'm always surprised people on TV know anyone's apartment number in the first place.  I've never known my neighbors' apartment numbers.  I just know they live "over there."  I never even know my friends' apartment numbers, after the first time I find it and learn where it is.

In most apartments in NYC you have to know the apartment number because the names aren't on the buzzer.  You buzz the apartment for them to let you in.

Or you could phone them of course.  Back in the day the buzzers were broken so much you'd phone from a pay phone or a bar and they'd come down and let you in, or throw the key out the window to you.  Easier to do that now that everybody (but me) has a cell phone.

Edited by ratgirlagogo
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3 minutes ago, janie jones said:

That makes sense for friends, but it doesn't explain why anyone would know their neighbor's apartment numbers, especially if they don't even live on the same floor.

The old L&O episodes frequently included a busybody neighbor who provided a wealth of info to the detectives. I don't know how common that is IRL NYC. 

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23 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

The old L&O episodes frequently included a busybody neighbor who provided a wealth of info to the detectives. I don't know how common that is IRL NYC. 

My parents don't live in NYC, but assuming human nature is human nature, it's probably common. They're always looking out the window at the comings and goings of their neighborhood. If there is ever a murder on their street, they will be prepared with all the info the cops will want to know about who was home when, what time someone left, if there was a loud argument.

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44 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

The old L&O episodes frequently included a busybody neighbor who provided a wealth of info to the detectives. I don't know how common that is IRL NYC. 

Yes, in NYC, there's always some old lady who sits by her window all day watching what is going on in the neighborhood.

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2 hours ago, Moose135 said:

Yes, in NYC, there's always some old lady who sits by her window all day watching what is going on in the neighborhood.

Also the more downscale/blue collar the neighborhood, the more time people spend outside on the street, playing cards or dominoes, drinking, listening to the radio, cooking food.  It's not just the little old ladies who notice comings and goings.

But that doesn't mean they're going to tell somebody they never saw before which apartment is yours.  At least not in my experience.  They'd come bang on the door and ask if I was expecting somebody.

Edited by ratgirlagogo
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If you're a mom who is on the PTA, sports club, Cub Scout den mother, etc - you're a total bitch. Your whole mission is to make sure your child is number one and make everyone else miserable. You didn't join to help out or to make the group better, nope. Just a busybody bitch with nothing better to do.

ETA - I'm posting this in between making Sign Up Geniuses and FB postings for my son's figure skating club. I've also been on the PTA board. Half the time I think "why am I doing this? No one cares and everyone just complains about what we did anyway." I'm not a busybody, just a glutton for punishment.

Edited by ChromaKelly
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On TV, anytime one goes to a restaurant, a bar or even a nightclub with a house band playing onstage, somehow those bands ALWAYS play just loud enough to be heard but quiet enough for the protagonists to be able to converse with each other without having to raise their voices - even on shows where their background soundtracks WAIL   out the dialogue!   

 If only house bands existed in Real Life that one could converse over without having to SHOUT! 

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On 10/19/2018 at 5:17 PM, andromeda331 said:

Watching Elementary made think of this police consultants or PIs whether they are Holmes or pretending to be psychics or anyone else. Regularly break into people's homes and businesses to get information, look around for clues and evidences so they later can bring the police to "find". Even though that is illegal which is either ignored or not questioned. On the rare times it comes up they pretend the doors were unlocked or open, or thought they heard someone or a baby until they made it all the way inside. What's amazing asided from that being believed and not arrested and hauled off to jail is somehow despite all the cameras throughout the cities and neighborhoods there is never a single one that captures them breaking into the house or apartment or business. Even if its possibly they override the cameras at that house or apartment, what about all the others at nearby houses or apartments? On the news or various crime shows people are caught all the time breaking into the homes and other places if not by cameras there then other houses and street cams. Even in the shows where they some how can always find cameras, cameras always managing to capture licenses plates, and so in depth they see where the criminals is. There's not a single one of consultants or PIs caught on tape breaking in.

IRL, Alan Dershowitz got Claus Von Bulow acquitted primarily because the 'evidence' used in the first trial came from a PI Sunny Von Bulow's children hired.  The PI 'found' a black bag with a needle coated with insulin under Claus's bed.  It turned out that the insulin was all on the outside of the needle, and who would be stupid enough to keep incriminating evidence in his own bedroom months later?

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3 hours ago, Mulva said:

IRL, Alan Dershowitz got Claus Von Bulow acquitted primarily because the 'evidence' used in the first trial came from a PI Sunny Von Bulow's children hired.  The PI 'found' a black bag with a needle coated with insulin under Claus's bed.  It turned out that the insulin was all on the outside of the needle, and who would be stupid enough to keep incriminating evidence in his own bedroom months later?

Sounds like a plot point we might be seeing in next season's Elementary, even though it seems to have been publicized in the 1990 movie, Reversal of Fortune, and therefore likely occurred in one or more episodes of L&O.

OT, @Mulva, is your screen name a Seinfeld reference?

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Yes, it is a Seinfeld reference.  It was either that or newmanium, or maybe jerkstore.

Back on topic:  The cute baby added to the show when the youngest child outgrows their own cuteness will suddenly age to kindergardener age over the summer while the rest of the kids only age 3 months.  See Family Ties, or Growing Pains.

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8 minutes ago, Mulva said:

Yes, it is a Seinfeld reference.  It was either that or newmanium, or maybe jerkstore.

Back on topic:  The cute baby added to the show when the youngest child outgrows their own cuteness will suddenly age to kindergardener age over the summer while the rest of the kids only age 3 months.  See Family Ties, or Growing Pains.

Or Fresh Prince of Bel Aire.  Or Step By Step.  Or even Last Man Standing, except that the show started with the baby.

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On ‎10‎/‎18‎/‎2018 at 5:52 PM, HazelEyes4325 said:

I see this all the time...in fact, I just watched an episode of a show where it happened twice!

A person comes to the door of someone's house (bonus points if it is a large house).  They ring the doorbell and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they knock and wait about 3 seconds.  Then they open the door and walk right into the house saying, "Hello?  Anyone home?"

First of all, give it a good 20-30 seconds before re-ringing the doorbell or switching to knocking.  Secondly, don't just walk into someone's house.  I mean, who does that? (Besides burglars, of course...)

I'll do that at my best friend's house IF she's expecting me anyway AND I've allowed a minute or so after ringing/knocking.  At my mom's house, I always walk right in; her door's only locked at night.

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1 hour ago, Katy M said:

Or Fresh Prince of Bel Aire.  Or Step By Step.  Or even Last Man Standing, except that the show started with the baby.

Even way back on Bewitched although not to a kindergartener. Adam went from a baby to a two year old. 

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21 minutes ago, proserpina65 said:

I'll do that at my best friend's house IF she's expecting me anyway AND I've allowed a minute or so after ringing/knocking.

Yeah, I do that, too, with any of my three closest friends (and they are always expecting me; I would never show up unannounced, as I loathe drop-ins myself), walk in if there hasn't been an answer in about a minute, and call out, "Knock knock."  This happens a lot at one friend's house, because I have a knack for getting there when she's out back switching laundry.

At my parents' house, which is the house in which I grew up, I don't even knock/ring, I just let myself in (again, they know I'm coming, and when).

But, yes, on TV, people a) do the walk-in with people where the relationship between them is such that I think, "I would never enter my [whatever's] house without them opening the door or saying 'come in'" and b) do not wait to see if their knock/ring will be answered before doing so.  And I know it's for the same reason that when a door is opened on TV, it's answered very quickly - dead air while someone makes their way to the door/waits for the door to be opened is not interesting - but the idea that people are always lurking right inside their front door, ready to answer within three seconds is one of those TV Things I've always noticed.

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On 10/22/2018 at 4:41 PM, Bastet said:

Yeah, I do that, too, with any of my three closest friends (and they are always expecting me; I would never show up unannounced, as I loathe drop-ins myself), walk in if there hasn't been an answer in about a minute, and call out, "Knock knock."  This happens a lot at one friend's house, because I have a knack for getting there when she's out back switching laundry.

My one friend will usually leave the door unlocked if she's expecting me because she's never ready on time so she's usually running around when I show.  I'll give a knock and then ultimately let myself in.  I'd never do it unannounced.  I usually yell the "Don't mind me, I'm just barging through your house" line from Charmed to let her know I'm there..  She never watched Charmed but at least I find myself amusing.

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On 10/20/2018 at 6:51 PM, ratgirlagogo said:

Yes, in NYC, there's always some old lady who sits by her window all day watching what is going on in the neighborhood.

Actually, some neurologists and physical therapists recommend that to stroke patients--and to write down everything they observe, as well as the times when things happened--so that nosy old lady might have a legitimate reason for being so.

On 10/22/2018 at 4:41 PM, Bastet said:

a) do the walk-in with people where the relationship between them is such that I think, "I would never enter my [whatever's] house without them opening the door or saying 'come in'" and b) do not wait to see if their knock/ring will be answered before doing so.  And I know it's for the same reason that when a door is opened on TV, it's answered very quickly - dead air while someone makes their way to the door/waits for the door to be opened is not interesting - but the idea that people are always lurking right inside their front door, ready to answer within three seconds is one of those TV Things I've always noticed.

The opening skit of the 2006 Emmys found host Conan O'Brien wandering into several TV shows. Towards the end, he walked into an empty house, only to find himself in the middle of an episode of "To Catch A Predator", with every truthful explanation that he gave sounding exactly like the lame excuses given by real predators and therefore only serving to make him look more guilty.

After watching it, I couldn't help but wonder if any perfectly decent and normal guys had ever accidentally wandered into the house for some completely legitimate reason--"I'm lost", "My car broke down"--only to get busted.

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18 minutes ago, Camille said:
On 10/20/2018 at 6:51 PM, ratgirlagogo said:

Yes, in NYC, there's always some old lady who sits by her window all day watching what is going on in the neighborhood.

Actually, some neurologists and physical therapists recommend that to stroke patients--and to write down everything they observe, as well as the times when things happened--so that nosy old lady might have a legitimate reason for being so.

The quote you have attributed to me is actually from Moose135, to which I replied:

On 10/20/2018 at 6:51 PM, ratgirlagogo said:

Also the more downscale/blue collar the neighborhood, the more time people spend outside on the street, playing cards or dominoes, drinking, listening to the radio, cooking food.  It's not just the little old ladies who notice comings and goings.

I suppose somebody might be keeping track of things because their neurologist or physical therapist suggested it but it always has seemed to me more that each blue collar NYC neighborhood is a village where most of the people who have been there for a while are aware of and interested in each other.

Edited by ratgirlagogo
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I don't know how true it is but on TV it seems that nobody ever moves in New York because they are protecting their rent controlled home.  I would assume that tighter knitted communities are bound to form

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3 hours ago, kiddo82 said:

I usually yell the "Don't mind me, I'm just barging through your house" line from Charmed to let her know I'm there..  She never watched Charmed but at least I find myself amusing.

I am cheerfully amused picturing you finding yourself amusing in this way, @kiddo82.

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22 hours ago, Raja said:

I don't know how true it is but on TV it seems that nobody ever moves in New York because they are protecting their rent controlled home.  I would assume that tighter knitted communities are bound to form

Rent controlled apartments are very rare these days, larger buildings in Manhattan and some other parts of the city are rent stabilized to some extent.  Yes, many people can afford to stay in their neighborhood but could never afford to move into it.   Equally true of other cities with crazy rents like San Francisco I guess.  

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I have never been able to understand why so many people expect to have sex after the school formal (prom) like it is something that they deserve and they are entitled to because it isn't.

Socialization and the beauty it encompasses I suppose. Undeserved privilege aside, logistically it strikes me as a bad idea as well. It's a pain in the ass to get those dresses off! Why the hell would anyone have sex THEN? It sounds like a lot of effort.

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