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Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality


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1 hour ago, theredhead77 said:

I saved and saved for this Walkman. Because I was soooooooooo active I needed a Sport Walkman*

 

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*I had no need for a Sport Walkman.

Everybody needs something that bright in their life.

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Totally different topic, I hate it when the single TV character has a full bowl of fresh fruit on their countertop. I buy bananas two at a time or they go brown. Don't get me started on apples, peaches, oranges. Giant bowls of fresh fruit are for families. Two bananas, an orange and an apple are for single people.

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I eat an apple pretty much every day when they're in season, so I do have quite a few of them in the bowl if I've recently gone to market.  (I have a shallow fruit bowl, so it doesn't require a huge amount of fruit to fill, maybe 5-7 pieces depending on the fruit.)  But peaches, nectarines, avocados, mangoes, etc. are only in the bowl to ripen, after which they're in the fridge, rather than sitting out looking pretty.  So I'll pick lemons, limes, and/or oranges and fill the bowl with them because they go with the colors of my kitchen and thus look decorative, on top of being something that lasts a while and gets used frequently.

(No comment on how many bananas a single person could realistically have at one time, as I hate them so much I can't even stand the smell.)

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21 hours ago, BlackberryJam said:

Totally different topic, I hate it when the single TV character has a full bowl of fresh fruit on their countertop. I buy bananas two at a time or they go brown. Don't get me started on apples, peaches, oranges. Giant bowls of fresh fruit are for families. Two bananas, an orange and an apple are for single people.

I think it depends if you are a Sad Single Person or a Happy Successful Single who doesn't need no man/woman in their life and is doing just fine, thank you. If you are Happy, you'll have the bowl of fruit and a vase of fresh flowers, plus some quirky, brightly colored throw pillows.  You also grocery shop and bring home the single paper bag with the baguette and bunch of carrots with the greens sticking out of the bag.  Perhaps you wear a jaunty hat. Sad Single People get the week old container of Chinese takeout, a bottle of ketchup, and beer in their fridge. You have no bright bowl of fruit or flowers. Maybe a dead plant you forgot to water. You only bring home takeout that you eat in front of the TV like the sad, lonely person you are.

Edited by ChromaKelly
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26 minutes ago, ChromaKelly said:

I think it depends if you are a Sad Single Person or a Happy Successful Single who doesn't need no man/woman in their life and is doing just fine, thank you. If you are Happy, you'll have the bowl of fruit and a vase of fresh flowers, plus some quirky, brightly colored throw pillows.  You also grocery shop and bring home the single paper bag with the baguette and bunch of carrots with the greens sticking out of the bag.  Perhaps you wear a jaunty hat. Sad Single People get the week old container of Chinese takeout, a bottle of ketchup, and beer in their fridge. You have no bright bowl of fruit or flowers. Maybe a dead plant you forgot to water. You only bring home takeout that you eat in front of the TV like the sad, lonely person you are.

This makes me think how everyone on TV loves Chinese food, Thai, pizza, etc. There's never one picking eater who doesn't like it or don't like pizza with everything on it or pepperoni or something. Nope, they all love whatever kind of pizza they order or pick up.  Not even put onions on half the pizza.  If it was my friends and I with those takeout options? We'd all end up picking up food at different places.                                                                               

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36 minutes ago, andromeda331 said:

This makes me think how everyone on TV loves Chinese food, Thai, pizza, etc. There's never one picking eater who doesn't like it or don't like pizza with everything on it or pepperoni or something. Nope, they all love whatever kind of pizza they order or pick up.  Not even put onions on half the pizza.  If it was my friends and I with those takeout options? We'd all end up picking up food at different places.                                                                               

Actually, there are picky people on TV.  But, they're the outcasts of the group and shown to be unreasonable in every aspect of life.  Or, they're just allergic to everything which makes them geeky nerds who don't actually deserve friends, but the rest of the gang will hang out with them because they're just so darn nice to the dregs of society.

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42 minutes ago, Katy M said:

Actually, there are picky people on TV.  But, they're the outcasts of the group and shown to be unreasonable in every aspect of life.  Or, they're just allergic to everything which makes them geeky nerds who don't actually deserve friends, but the rest of the gang will hang out with them because they're just so darn nice to the dregs of society.

Yes, only nerds and geeks have allergies and asthma. Nerdy boys with asthma take a puff of their inhaler when they see a pretty girl or something tense is happening. 

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That's right! Cool people never have allergies or asthma on TV. Diabetes only exist for people with them to cheat and sneak sweets or if cops search the place and find needles or for dramatic medical emergency during hostage crisis, disasters and other things will you get your insulin in time? 

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Oh yes, busy Happy Single People always have time to shop for baguettes and wear jaunty hats and have giant mounds of fruit that never go bad, yet are always going out to eat with friends. It's only Sad Miserable Singles Desperate for a RELATIONSHIP who have no time to shop for fresh fruit, although their lives are completely empty.

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32 minutes ago, BlackberryJam said:

Oh yes, busy Happy Single People always have time to shop for baguettes and wear jaunty hats and have giant mounds of fruit that never go bad, yet are always going out to eat with friends. It's only Sad Miserable Singles Desperate for a RELATIONSHIP who have no time to shop for fresh fruit, although their lives are completely empty.

Unless they need the person to see their ex with his new spouse, happily shopping for food. I watched the pilot of Private Practice, ten years ago (yikes), and even though I was still considered young at the time, it bothered me - the woman he actually married was the under-thirty yoga instructor. 

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18 hours ago, andromeda331 said:

This makes me think how everyone on TV loves Chinese food, Thai, pizza, etc. There's never one picking eater who doesn't like it or don't like pizza with everything on it or pepperoni or something. Nope, they all love whatever kind of pizza they order or pick up.  Not even put onions on half the pizza.  If it was my friends and I with those takeout options? We'd all end up picking up food at different places.                                                                               

It doesn't matter anyway since no one ever takes more than one bite.

16 hours ago, andromeda331 said:

Cool people never have allergies or asthma on TV

The only exception was Shannon on Lost.  But that only lasted for one episode.

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Speaking of Chinese food, why is it that whatever they eat, it's always eaten straight out of the carton?  I mean, a lot, or even most of, Chinese food comes with rice, yet they never show them taking rice out of the carton and putting the chicken and broccoli on top, for example.  Are they all eating lo mein noodles? 

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I don't eat rice (other than with something like curry, or another dish with a lot of sauce), so I don't need to mix it in with my kung pao or whatever, but I still don't tend to eat Chinese food out of the carton.  Those little cartons from TV, anyway; when I have food delivered that way, it's usually a half order of a couple of different things, so I put some of each on a plate. 

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

Speaking of Chinese food, why is it that whatever they eat, it's always eaten straight out of the carton?  I mean, a lot, or even most of, Chinese food comes with rice, yet they never show them taking rice out of the carton and putting the chicken and broccoli on top, for example.  Are they all eating lo mein noodles? 

And like, don't you want a little of this and a little of that?  Does this person only get beef and broccoli, and that person only get orange chicken, and that person only get kung pao chicken?

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

Yeah but on tv (and in movies) nobody eats the rice.  I guess it just looks "cool" to be eating out of the carton with the chopsticks (which I still can't use).

I can't use them, either. I get a fork. I eat out of the large cartons, and occasionally the little ones - but I tend to get the food from a buffet area at this one place, that also has these lovely doughnuts, and they have the large cartons. 

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Since I have a full fruit bowl, buy carrots with the leafy green tops and baguettes, and use canvas grocery bags (no jaunty hat, though), I guess I'm happy not to share the TV cliché of eating Chinese food out of the little white carton.  I do eat ice cream right out of the container, though.

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4 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Since I have a full fruit bowl, buy carrots with the leafy green tops and baguettes, and use canvas grocery bags (no jaunty hat, though), I guess I'm happy not to share the TV cliché of eating Chinese food out of the little white carton.  I do eat ice cream right out of the container, though.

I do all of the above apparently I am a real life tv trope!

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Eating Chinese food out of an opaque carton probably makes it somewhat easier to keep visual continuity right when they have to shoot multiple takes of a scene.  If they plated it, some poor PA would have to be in charge of counting the broccoli pieces before they start each take. 

Edited by selkie
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4 hours ago, selkie said:

Eating Chinese food out of an opaque carton probably makes it somewhat easier to keep visual continuity right when they have to shoot multiple takes of a scene.  If they plated it, some poor PA would have to be in charge of counting the broccoli pieces before they start each take. 

That, and when have we ever seen young singles on TV wash dishes?

Edited by shapeshifter
Because wash, not was
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On 11/9/2017 at 11:33 AM, andromeda331 said:

This makes me think how everyone on TV loves Chinese food, Thai, pizza, etc. There's never one picking eater who doesn't like it or don't like pizza with everything on it or pepperoni or something. Nope, they all love whatever kind of pizza they order or pick up.  Not even put onions on half the pizza.  If it was my friends and I with those takeout options? We'd all end up picking up food at different places.                                                                               

One of my favorite pizza related things that has shown up on a few shows I've watched over the years is: we didn't know what kind of pizza you like so we ordered one with everything.

...what?

You don't know what kind of pizza I like, so your solution is to load it up with toppings?  You didn't order a plain cheese as a safety option?  You're certain that I eat meat, or don't have allergies to certain vegetables, or even LIKE the common toppings that are available at most pizza places?  Even if you know that I eat meat, don't have any vegetable allergies and like the common toppings, how do you know that I like any of that on pizza?  I know lots of people who like pineapple but the number who like it on pizza goes down dramatically.  I mix onions into my tuna salad but I HATE them on pizza.  My mother likes sausage but gets heartburn if it's on a pizza.  Yet these possibilities never occur to these tv people when they order an everything pizza for guests coming over. 

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14 minutes ago, scarynikki12 said:

One of my favorite pizza related things that has shown up on a few shows I've watched over the years is: we didn't know what kind of pizza you like so we ordered one with everything.

...what?

You don't know what kind of pizza I like, so your solution is to load it up with toppings?  You didn't order a plain cheese as a safety option?  You're certain that I eat meat, or don't have allergies to certain vegetables, or even LIKE the common toppings that are available at most pizza places?  Even if you know that I eat meat, don't have any vegetable allergies and like the common toppings, how do you know that I like any of that on pizza?  I know lots of people who like pineapple but the number who like it on pizza goes down dramatically.  I mix onions into my tuna salad but I HATE them on pizza.  My mother likes sausage but gets heartburn if it's on a pizza.  Yet these possibilities never occur to these tv people when they order an everything pizza for guests coming over. 

Whenever that happens, I think about those little fish things that are an option in some places. Anchovies! I had to google, and in doing so, I found more gross seafood options for pizza. I can't stand seafood - I once took a spoonful of macaroni cheese, only to find it had lobster mixed in. Blech. 

I also can't stand ham, and that would probably be on an all-meat pizza. I wish I still enjoyed pizza. I would love a tasty deep dish, rather than the flat ones. 

Edited by Anela
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8 hours ago, Anela said:

I once took a spoonful of macaroni cheese, only to find it had lobster mixed in. Blech. 

I like seafood (although have never tasted lobster), but this sounds appalling. Unless I knew everyone eating it actually liked that combination, I'd be scared to serve it in case someone was allergic to seafood.

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On 11/9/2017 at 11:55 AM, ChromaKelly said:

Sad Single People get the week old container of Chinese takeout, a bottle of ketchup, and beer in their fridge. You have no bright bowl of fruit or flowers. Maybe a dead plant you forgot to water. You only bring home takeout that you eat in front of the TV like the sad, lonely person you are.

If the singles are Terribly Sad, they don't even care enough to order in and just eat powdered doughnuts on their sofas scattered with potato chip crumbs. If they don't comb their hair and eat junk food in bed with the dog, it's time for the Friend Intervention Scene.

On 11/9/2017 at 1:11 PM, Katy M said:

Actually, there are picky people on TV. But, they're the outcasts of the group and shown to be unreasonable in every aspect of life. Or, they're just allergic to everything which makes them geeky nerds who don't actually deserve friends, but the rest of the gang will hang out with them because they're just so darn nice to the dregs of society.

And thus it came to pass that the picky nerds were interminably declared to be "on the spectrum" in every online discussion group anywhere. ;-)

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No matter how long you've known someone, you still refer to your male child as "my son".  It's rarely his name.  It's rarely "him/he", it's almost always "my son".  I don't recall hearing "my daughter" as much as "my son".  The more serious the situation is that the son is involved with the more the phrase is used.

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4 hours ago, Popples said:

I like seafood (although have never tasted lobster), but this sounds appalling. Unless I knew everyone eating it actually liked that combination, I'd be scared to serve it in case someone was allergic to seafood.

Lobster was something my parents would have rarely, so I wasn't expecting it to be hidden in that. :) Dad saw it somewhere, and brought some home for mum, and left it in a pan. I see macaroni, and think, "Ooh!" So it wasn't served. :) I just took a spoonful of what was left. 

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1 hour ago, ABay said:

Siblings only call each other "brother" or "sister" and never their actual names. This might be limited to specific genres; I mostly hear in sci fi and period dramas.

I hear that a lot in the local stores, usually along the lines of mother saying "Sister, don't hit Brother".

But I am in the South.

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3 hours ago, ABay said:

Siblings only call each other "brother" or "sister" and never their actual names. This might be limited to specific genres; I mostly hear in sci fi and period dramas.

In other words a different culture. On one side of my family older brothers, sisters, cousins... are always referred to as such. Translated to English "big brother/sister". Along with other titles and honorifics beyond "doctor" or "officer" used by most Americans, like say "Attorney"

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A big city person always rushes into a small town diner and starts ordering a fancy latte or cappuccino.  They never stop to look at the menu and cant understand a place that doesn't serve double lattes.  Plus, the small town waitress invariably looks mystified because she is too backward to know what a cappuccino is.

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9 minutes ago, caci said:

A big city person always rushes into a small town diner and starts ordering a fancy latte or cappuccino.  They never stop to look at the menu and cant understand a place that doesn't serve double lattes.  Plus, the small town waitress invariably looks mystified because she is too backward to know what a cappuccino is.

It also bugs me when they act like they're uppity, though. If they just aren't thinking, and weren't rude about it.

Three years ago, I was in  a bookstore cafe with my dad. A woman was having a go at the guy behind the counter, for not having a special tea, or sweetener for a regular tea, that would be okay for person with diabetes. I almost got up and told her she needed to back off - she was loud and offensive, and called him an asshole when she got back to her table (which was next to ours). I heard him trying to be helpful, and she shouted him down. I wouldn't expect to walk into a cafe like that, and have them deal in specialized teas.  She could have got her special tea from the Starbucks, that was just across the parking lot, before they came into the bookstore - or popped over for it, when she realized they didn't serve it there.

Edited by Anela
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17 hours ago, Anela said:

Whenever that happens, I think about those little fish things that are an option in some places. Anchovies! I had to google, and in doing so, I found more gross seafood options for pizza. I can't stand seafood - I once took a spoonful of macaroni cheese, only to find it had lobster mixed in. Blech. 

I also can't stand ham, and that would probably be on an all-meat pizza. I wish I still enjoyed pizza. I would love a tasty deep dish, rather than the flat ones. 

Never order anchovies, unless you want to be turned into a bowling ball. (I'm sure I saw a video on TV at least once, so it can be considered a thing that happened on TV that never happens in real life. Or maybe not. Still, no anchovies, please.)

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20 hours ago, scarynikki12 said:

One of my favorite pizza related things that has shown up on a few shows I've watched over the years is: we didn't know what kind of pizza you like so we ordered one with everything.

In college we called that a Zen Pizza ("Make me One with Everything!")

They never do the obvious and order several different smaller sized safety pizzas instead. I used to work at a company that did that when they ordered pizzas for lunch meetings. Usually they got a cheese, a veggie, a plain pepperoni and an Italian sausage in addition to whatever else they were getting.

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16 hours ago, 2727 said:

If the singles are Terribly Sad, they don't even care enough to order in and just eat powdered doughnuts on their sofas scattered with potato chip crumbs. If they don't comb their hair and eat junk food in bed with the dog, it's time for the Friend Intervention Scene.

On the shows that I watch, the Terribly Sad Singles just eat ice cream right out of the container.

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7 hours ago, Sandman87 said:

In college we called that a Zen Pizza ("Make me One with Everything!")

They never do the obvious and order several different smaller sized safety pizzas instead. I used to work at a company that did that when they ordered pizzas for lunch meetings. Usually they got a cheese, a veggie, a plain pepperoni and an Italian sausage in addition to whatever else they were getting.

In College, if we were sharing pizza, we’d order a ‘deluxe’ (with everything on it) and then just take off the bits we didn’t like, because it was cheaper than asking for specific toppings to go on. But that was always a mutual decision. 

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On 31/10/2017 at 1:12 AM, Katy M said:

That drives me crazy. I don't even care if there's blood or not. If someone has clearly been in your house, you don't know if they're still there or not.  Run to a neighbor's if you know them well enough, otherwise get in your car, and call the cops from away from the house.  And, don't go back until the police are there.  Common sense, people.  I can understand it more, of course, if you walk in the door and your son is bleeding out on the floor and nothing is going to stop you from helping him, stupid or not.  But, even then, grab your cell phone and dial 911 as you run across the room.  At least, the police can be on their way if someone jumps out to kill you.

Urgh, yes!  It has happened twice now that I have gotten home and seen obvious signs of break-in as I stepped through the door (I stay in South Africa, so while it is a rare occurrence it is not unheard of).  Both times, I quickly backed out, got in my car, drove a couple of houses down, and called the cops.  Never have I decided to "investigate" on my own.

 

 

Another thing that has been mentioned that I completely agree with, is the way (mostly) women react to being mugged/attacked.  Again, it has happened twice that I have been mugged - once whilst standing at a bus stop (phone grabbed out of my hands) and another time as I was walking down the street, somebody stole my handbag from my shoulder.  Both times, I just yelled "stop!" once - out of reflex, but didn't scream my head off.  Also didn't try to attack the guy or try to get my things back from them...  Just went to report it  to the police (well the handbag, the phone I just went to my nearest service provider to block the nr and get a new sim and nr) and continued with my life...  On TV it would be a whole episode of shenanigans...

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On 11/11/2017 at 0:01 PM, paulvdb said:

That's because you have to refer to your daughter as "my little girl".

And I love that. The very last words my dad ever spoke were "I love you too little girl" and I treasure that. I was 39 at the time.  By the time of his death he had quit drinking and we had gotten close so those words mean a lot to me. 

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Since we get old classic movies on tv now, (Turner Classics), we get to see how they placed very mature men in roles, where they are portrayed as being young, whippersnappers.  lol Older actors who looked to be in their 40's are portrayed as a young fellow in his 20's.  It's so funny to me.  They even call them out as "young man."  lol  

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