Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[DoctorAtomic]

On tv, everyone has a secret wall safe.

[merylinkid]

Well yeah, where else are you going to keep the stacks of cash that everyone has?  Still needed banded but laying in a disorderly pile in the safe.

[2727]

10 hours ago, DoctorAtomic said:

On tv, everyone has a secret wall safe.

A surprising number also have hiding spots underneath their floorboards.

Although they shouldn't bother since some snoop or other always finds it just by walking around. 

[DoctorAtomic]

Yes. If it's an old house. There's always a floorboard. 

[kiddo82]

Any drug that has a tangible physical effect will work instantly.  Alcohol, antihistamines, laxatives, muscle relaxers, caffeine, etc.  And they always work no matter who takes them or the dosage.  Not every person is able to process these chemicals the same way.

[Blergh]

8 minutes ago, kiddo82 said:

Any drug that has a tangible physical effect will work instantly.  Alcohol, antihistamines, laxatives, muscle relaxers, caffeine, etc.  And they always work no matter who takes them or the dosage.  Not every person is able to process these chemicals the same way.

And so often on TV, the effects seem to make the Hulk's transformation seem like a rather quiet, subtle event! 

[juno]

One of my favorites that only happens on TV is when someone gets upset on TV and stomp out of the room. Of course someone runs after them to console/help them.

Probably pointing this out because I am jealous that it doesn't happen to me when I get sad and whiny.

[piccadilly83]

On 10/20/2019 at 5:28 PM, shlbycindyk said:

You also never see anyone asking for a take out box when they're at a restaurant.  They'll order a meal, something will happen, and they just get up and leave the food on the table without taking a bite of anything.

Or when the do request a doggie bag, it comes in the form of a tinfoil swan.

[Glendenning]

Is anyone else thinking of South Park and "I'm going to take some Eric Roberts home in a doggie bag!"?

[shlbycindyk]

On 10/21/2019 at 6:15 PM, juno said:

One of my favorites that only happens on TV is when someone gets upset on TV and stomp out of the room. Of course someone runs after them to console/help them.

Probably pointing this out because I am jealous that it doesn't happen to me when I get sad and whiny.

Nobody ever runs after me either.  That's probably because they're happy that I'm leaving because when I get whiny, I REALLY get whiny.

[Mittengirl]

I have never seen (or known of) a woman accidentally tuck her skirt/dress into her undies, but tv would have you believe it happens all the time.  And, of course, there is never someone around who can discretely inform her of her wardrobe mishap and give her the chance to fix it before she walks down the aisle or in to a job interview or when meeting her significant other’s parents.

Edited October 27, 2019 by Mittengirl

[DoctorAtomic]

I didn't even know that was a thing.

[biakbiak]

27 minutes ago, Mittengirl said:

have never seen (or known of) a woman accidentally tuck her skirt/dress into her undies, but tv would have you believe it happens all the time.

We should have brunch it’s happened to me more than once but always someone had my back (literally and figuratively) to mention it before too many people noticed.

Edited October 27, 2019 by biakbiak

[Mittengirl]

Biakbiak, didn't you feel a draft back there?  
 

[Glendenning]

it's probably cause humiliating a woman is seen as "funny" and it's being a bit "naughty" about undergarments.

[merylinkid]

You don't feel a draft.   Apparently I recently walked through the lobby of the courthouse with my skirt tucked into my nylons until someone caught up to me and told me.  

[biakbiak]

Yep no draft for me but I also wear a lot of loose knee length skirts/dresses so they tend to move a lot. Also, I can be in my own head a lot so I don’t always notice what’s around me or apparently on me.

Edited October 27, 2019 by biakbiak

[DoctorAtomic]

The simple answer then is just don't wear underpants and it won't happen. 

[Rose Quartz]

3 hours ago, merylinkid said:

You don't feel a draft.   Apparently I recently walked through the lobby of the courthouse with my skirt tucked into my nylons until someone caught up to me and told me.  

Yep, I was once halfway down the hall from the restroom before I realized that something didn't feel right about how my skirt was moving and it was because I'd accidentally got an end stuck in my nylons.  Fortunately no one saw me, but it wasn't immediately obvious to me.

[Irlandesa]

I always try to double check but it has happened to me too. Sometimes on TV it's super exaggerated...like the whole skirt is tucked in.  That I'd probably feel.  But the most common thing that happens is that the liner or the top half of the skirt gets caught in underwear or tights.  So there's still some coverage but not much.

[Glendenning]

A guy once told my sister that silk and nylons are so much sexier than boxers. She just... stared at him.

[Shannon L.]

Is it ever lightly raining on tv (and in movies)?  It seems like it's always either sunny or absolutely pouring.  Unless there's a need for an ominous look/feel--then it's very cloudy and gray or foggy. 

[DoctorAtomic]

If you're going to make out with someone outside, it's practically a hurricane.

[Katy M]

14 hours ago, Shannon L. said:

Is it ever lightly raining on tv (and in movies)?  It seems like it's always either sunny or absolutely pouring.  Unless there's a need for an ominous look/feel--then it's very cloudy and gray or foggy. 

To be fair, unless they added dialogue about it, you probably wouldn't even see light rain come across on camera.  Think about how many times you look through a closed window trying to tell if it's raining or not and the only way you can do it is by find a puddle and seeing the drips on that.

[kassygreene]

On the other hand, it is frequently lightly raining when it shouldn't be - happens all the time on shows shot in Vancouver.  If you look carefully you can see it in lots of night shoots.

[Shannon L.]

Whenever someone learns something upsetting they always ask someone close to the matter "did you know?!".  They never continue, it's just simply "did you know?"

[merylinkid]

Was just thinking of this one -- someone is having a big celebration, wedding, Christmas party, whatever.   They make two lists of people, those to invite and those to not invite.   Somehow, the people on the do not invite list get all invited.    Hilarious hijinks ensure.   

Why would anyone have two lists?   You make a list of people to invite.   If a name is not a list, they aren't invited.   Much simpler.    

[Blergh]

On 11/1/2019 at 6:51 PM, Shannon L. said:

Whenever someone learns something upsetting they always ask someone close to the matter "did you know?!".  They never continue, it's just simply "did you know?"

Unless the one asking 'did you know' WANTS to be the first bearer of bad news- and winds up disappointed that the other person has already heard (hence gotten the wind taken out of their buzzard wings). Alas, I HAVE run into folks like that in Real Life (and/or keeps pressing to tell the bad news even if the other person has said they'd rather not hear it at that particular time). 

[DoctorAtomic]

My only list lists people who I do not want to invite to my house. Unless you have fur and four legs and promise to be a good girl. Then you can come over. 

[Anela]

I'm watching yet another show where people are running, and running, and running some more. I don't know how they do it. At this point, I feel like I should be in training for a marathon *just in case*. 

[Katy M]

3 minutes ago, Anela said:

I'm watching yet another show where people are running, and running, and running some more. I don't know how they do it. At this point, I feel like I should be in training for a marathon *just in case*. 

Don't forget to cross-train because you will also have to jump over a fence.  In a pinch, you may be able to climb it, but a single vault over it seems to be what most people do.  There are also likely to be stairs at some point in your run.

[Trini]

10 minutes ago, Katy M said:

Don't forget to cross-train because you will also have to jump over a fence. 

... And slide across the hood of a car.

[DearEvette]

2 minutes ago, Trini said:

... And slide across the hood of a car.

My husband and I were talking about this the other day.  Back in the Starsky and Hutch olden times this was so much easier because the cars were lower slung.  These days every other person has an SUV so you have to parkour before you slide.  LOL.

[Bort]

11 minutes ago, DearEvette said:

My husband and I were talking about this the other day.  Back in the Starsky and Hutch olden times this was so much easier because the cars were lower slung.  These days every other person has an SUV so you have to parkour before you slide.  LOL.

Also, the hoods were thicker. Try to slide across the hood of a Honda and you'll cave the fucker in.

[Raja]

1 hour ago, DearEvette said:

My husband and I were talking about this the other day.  Back in the Starsky and Hutch olden times this was so much easier because the cars were lower slung.  These days every other person has an SUV so you have to parkour before you slide.  LOL.

It was especially easy for Hutch in the opening  credits when he jumps down from a ledge over the hood of his junker car.

[DoctorAtomic]

You people talk like you *aren't* actually sliding across the hood of your cars. 

[SVNBob]

[Bastet]

3 hours ago, kariyaki said:

Also, the hoods were thicker. Try to slide across the hood of a Honda and you'll cave the fucker in.

Yep, we used to plop down a beach towel and sunbathe on the '60s and '70s cars.  Now, there would be a me-sized dent in the hood.

[Bort]

1 minute ago, Bastet said:

Yep, we used to plop down a beach towel and sunbathe on the '60s and '70s cars.  Now, there would be a me-sized dent in the hood.

Years ago, I had a 1980 Oldsmobile that I would deliver pizza in. On slow nights, there would be six people parked on the hood of my car as we waited for an order.

[Jaded]

16 hours ago, DearEvette said:

My husband and I were talking about this the other day.  Back in the Starsky and Hutch olden times this was so much easier because the cars were lower slung.  These days every other person has an SUV so you have to parkour before you slide.  LOL.

Reading the Starsky and Hutch mentions put the theme music in my head so I thought I'd share. I hadn't realized they changed the theme in all four seasons even though 2 & 4 were supposed to be the same they sound slightly different to me. I only saw the show in syndication and from what I remember they used this theme either that or this is the one I remember most.
 

[Haleth]

Running-- but if you are a woman you will twist your ankle and fall.

[Ohiopirate02]

1 hour ago, Haleth said:

Running-- but if you are a woman you will twist your ankle and fall.

That is probably because the female character is running in shoes that no sane woman would ever attempt to run in.  She will also have her hair down and billowing behind her instead of using one of the 50 hair ties she has on her wrist or in her bag to pull her hair up.  

[Raja]

2 hours ago, Jaded said:

Reading the Starsky and Hutch mentions put the theme music in my head so I thought I'd share. I hadn't realized they changed the theme in all four seasons even though 2 & 4 were supposed to be the same they sound slightly different to me. I only saw the show in syndication and from what I remember they used this theme either that or this is the one I remember most.
 

The opening credits where Starsky fires into the air reminds of their very special episode when he shot a kid. Until then Paul Michael Glaser  is the first actor that I remember  who used the now familiar two handed grips with a semi automatic pistol all of the sudden shooting warning shots when the bullet has to come back down somewhere  for that episode only.

Even Navy SEAL in Tom Selleck's Magnum went with the one hand shooting a decade later . It would be the 90s before the TV gunmen followed Starsky's example.

[Shannon L.]

I never realized how many truck and bus drivers there were that were not only chatty, but so in tune with the people they are driving (apparently truckers are always picking up hitch hikers) that they not only engage in conversation about what's bothering the person, but have a ton of wisdom to share*.

*I'm not saying there are no kind drivers who are full of good advice, but tv would have you believe that they are everywhere and always willing to chat while on the job.

[Bort]

5 minutes ago, Shannon L. said:

I never realized how many truck and bus drivers there were that were not only chatty, but so in tune with the people they are driving (apparently truckers are always picking up hitch hikers) that they not only engage in conversation about what's bothering the person, but have a ton of wisdom to share*.

*I'm not saying there are no kind drivers who are full of good advice, but tv would have you believe that they are everywhere and always willing to chat while on the job.

Not to mention the willingness to pick up hitchhikers. I would imagine that in reality, the companies truck drivers work for probably have a policy against this.

[Katy M]

40 minutes ago, Shannon L. said:

I never realized how many truck and bus drivers there were that were not only chatty, but so in tune with the people they are driving (apparently truckers are always picking up hitch hikers) that they not only engage in conversation about what's bothering the person, but have a ton of wisdom to share*.

*I'm not saying there are no kind drivers who are full of good advice, but tv would have you believe that they are everywhere and always willing to chat while on the job.

Unless you live in Springfield.  Then the bus driver won't even give the lost little girl directions or tell her what bus she should get on.

[Popples]

Has anyone in real life brought home a person to pretend to be their significant other for the holidays just because they might run into an ex? And even more annoyingly the fake couple never come up with a cover story for the most basic of questions. When a person is introducing their special someone to their friends and family, the first thing they usually ask is "how did you two meet?", and the fake couple looks like deer in headlights.

[RealHousewife]

Obviously in a lot of TV and movies, there are many beautiful cast members.

But I think now and then when a character is supposed to be otherworldly beautiful, they don’t cast anyone very attractive as a supporting character or even an extra. Monica Bellucci is an amazing beauty, but there weren’t any other beautiful women in Malena. That’s totally unrealistic. 

[Blergh]

55 minutes ago, Popples said:

Has anyone in real life brought home a person to pretend to be their significant other for the holidays just because they might run into an ex? And even more annoyingly the fake couple never come up with a cover story for the most basic of questions. When a person is introducing their special someone to their friends and family, the first thing they usually ask is "how did you two meet?", and the fake couple looks like deer in headlights.

OR they hadn't agreed on a cover story before they saw the other folks and have to awkwardly make two very conflicting versions somehow gel together!

[Katy M]

59 minutes ago, Popples said:

When a person is introducing their special someone to their friends and family, the first thing they usually ask is "how did you two meet?", and the fake couple looks like deer in headlights.

Semi-funny story.  I met an actual boyfriend's mother (not a fake boyfriend) and she asked how we met, and we looked at each other and I laughed and said "I don't really remember specifically meeting you."

We worked at the same place.  I had been there before him (and had a different boyfriend when he started), and he had probably been there a couple of years before we started dating.