Season 1 Discussion

[gotta watch]

In my mind, Paul was just testing out the mosquito net and showing it to Karine. Also waiting for camera crew to leave. THEN he got up, showered, shaved, put clean clothes on. No way I can comprehend that he went to bed in those filthy clothes & shoes. The smell alone GACK.

[Drogo]

Patrick leaves for Paris, while Myriam worries about a secret she has been keeping from him; Paul and Karine's happiness is interrupted by distrust; Sean faces tough questions from Abby's parents; Larry fears his Filipino girlfriend may not be faithful.

[Drogo]

Larry tries to contact Jenny during his journey to the Philippines; Cortney hopes Antonio shows up at the airport; Darcey and Jesse struggle to explain their age gap to a skeptical friend; Sean makes a shocking discovery about Abby's ex.

[Mr. Miner]

Someone should have been rude to Darcy before she ever got to Holland. She's done lost her fucking mind and needs to be called on it.

[islandgal140]

1 hour ago, Awfarmington said:

Also, Jesse is officially a jerkbag. Yes Darcy is desperate, and delusional. But a man should stand up for his lady...instead he just says nobody's perfect. Really?! If a guy ever told his family that nobody's perfect, regarding me, I'm taking uber home! 

This!! I think the "Nobody's perfect" remark was made worse by the fact that all that preceded it was basically heaping praise on Jesse for being 'hot' having women throw their panties at him as he walks down the street (according to his stepdad) and having the world at his feet. He accepted all that as true facts and his due, which ego much? After all that praised heaped on him, the best he can do when his stepdad says Darcey is not at his level is to say 'nobody's perfect?' That sucked balls and was just as bad, if not worse, than what his stepdad said.

The morning after, when Darcy and Jesse were in their matching fuzzy bathrobes, it definitely looked like Jesse was wearing foundation. 

[Lily247]

If I were Karine's father, I would have strangled Paul. I felt so bad for him that he had a whole camera crew standing right there and he was pressured to give the go ahead to Karine. Paul really has absolutely no shame in asking Karine to accompany him to his motel the very first moment they met. Its not like they are going to have any conversation anyway. He culd have stayed over for a few hours at her home, had dinner with the family, take her for a long walk, then go to his motel alone. He cheapened this poor girl right in front of her own father. I was kind of taken aback that Karine was disappointed they werent having sex right away though. 

Just now, islandgal140 said:

This!! I think the "Nobody's perfect" remark was made worse by the fact that all that preceded it was basically heaping praise on Jesse for being 'hot' having women throw their panties at him as he walks down the street (according to his stepdad) and having the world at his feet. He accepted all that as true facts and his due, which ego much? After all that praised heaped on him, the best he can do when his stepdad says Darcey is not at his level is to say 'nobody's perfect?' That sucked balls and was just as bad, if not worse, than what his stepdad said.

The morning after, when Darcy and Jesse were in their matching fuzzy bathrobes, it definitely looked like Jesse was wearing foundation. 

I think the "nobodys perfect" remark was towards the stepdad not being perfect. In all honesty, despite the nasty comments, had it been my mom and dad they would have done way way worse, and no way would they have condoned the relationship or invited Darcey over for dinner. At least Jesse's parents seem to accept this relationship. Darcey seems very pleasant though and I do feel bad for her but even in a society as liberal as the Netherlands she will have to let go of her insecurities or she will drive them both nuts. 

[Former Nun]

3 minutes ago, Matias130 said:

I was kind of taken aback that Karine was disappointed they werent having sex right away though. 

I figured there may have been online "conversations" that gave Paul the impression Karine was definitely not a virgin.  Why, otherwise, would he want to test her for STDs and/or pregnancy?

[poeticlicensed]

You could tell that Paul was super proud of his gift of dollar store stuffed animals and My Little Pony blanket he put on the bed. In what twisted mind is that a thing to give a woman and in the next breath you ask to take an STD and pregnancy test?

I also have a question about the footlockers. I thought he was bringing all that food for Karine and her family. Them we see him dragging the footlockers up the hotel stairs, so I'm thinking all that snack food wasn't for her family, it was for him. If he thinks penis fish will swim up his pee hole if he doesn't wear a body condom, surely he must be thinking he can't eat the food. 

And asking Karine's parents if he can take her to a hotel when he was in their home for a hot minute was cringeworthy. 

If it wasn't for the TLC camera crew, Paul would not have made it to Kariene's home. Same for Cortney. Thank goodness a TLC crew is with her. She says she is going to stay in his apartment. For all she knows, "Antonio" might be a human trafficker.  

Edited August 28, 2017 by poeticlicensed

[kacesq]

What Jesse's stepdad said to Darcey was horribly rude.  Accurate, yet rude.  However, what should make Darcey more nervous is the completely nonchalant way Jesse went "Oh I love you too." when they got back in the car after meeting the folks and Darcey, insecure as f*ck, goes all whispery "I love you."  And Jesse's response had the same amount of enthusiasm he's shown...well just about this entire time.

Happy to be spared Abby and whatshisname last night. 

[PinkFlamingo]

Karine's parents facial expressions when they were being asked if Karine could immediately go to a hotel with Paul almost looked like they were announcing that she had a terminal illness or something. Sadness and resignation. 

Darcy- if a guy that looks like he was kicked out of some crazy cult because HIS views were too extreme for them says you are f-ing out of your mind, it's time to rethink your life decisions. 

This time around most of the couples are so cringeworthy (some even at skin crawling levels) and hard to watch that I hope the catfish ends up being as horrible as we expect for some comic relief.  My money is on us not even seeing him or her in the next episode.  TLC will keep everyone hanging on for the big reveal.

[Cherrio]

7 hours ago, SleepyAndClumsy said:

I can't help but feel sorry for Darcey. She is so needy that she puts up with really horrible treatment from someone who seems like a sociopath to me. He is constantly trying to make her feel bad about herself, and seemed gleeful when she mentioned Dave's insult. He even said that he thought the evening 'was delightful,' or somesuch. 

He is a creeper, plus he's not even all that! His skin is terribly acne-scarred. And his apartment is tinier that Pedro and Chantel's! ?

Ok, I was going to read all the posts before I wrote anything, but stopped at this one.    YES !

 Jesse is rude, bossy and not very nice in my book, plus I do not find him much to look at.  And that coat?  Did he borrow it from mommy?

I feel sorry for Darcey too.  Yes, she is an over done, garish and hideously dressed woman and desperate.  But she isn't mean, rude and demanding.

Geesh, that asshole has her riding a bike right after a very long and exhausting trip, then over to his hoarder parents house the next day. Go here, do this, do that, don't do this, don't do that. 

His stepfather is a cruel piece of shit.  Out of her league?    Uh, as another poster pointed out, he lives in a Ikea closet.   He doesn't have a league as far as I can see.  Darcey on the other hand has a successful business, a nice home and a family.

Darcey, learn a lesson from Jesse when he says we Dutch are direct.    Take a pair of those wooden shoes and shove one up Jesse's ass and the other in his step-fathers.  Pack your bags and right before you leave, give ol Jesse a Dutch oven as a parting gift.

[Latenites]

12 hours ago, Desert Rat said:

He went to bed in the same clothes he wore on the plane and the two day boat trip.  Has he showered?  

My exact thoughts. His pheromones must stink like crap.

[Gigglepuff]

Jesse does live in a small space, I don't think that's such a big deal. He's 24 and that's likely one of first apartments. He's also half the age of Darcy, so I wouldn't expect that his place is as big as hers and many young European live in small spaces. It's really no different than some "starter" apartments in NYC. Cost is a huge factor for young people in Europe, so I kind of get Jesse's small space and won't pick on him for that....

 

However, I find Alexi to be an example of a direct person. He's blunt and doesn't sugar coat, but Jesse is just rude. I don't feel badly for Darcy though, she's 42 and a needy idiot who left her kids alone for weeks while she's off in Europe chasing a boy toy. The stepfathers comment was rude, but if it were my son bringing home a woman twice his age and with two children I'd certainly want to know what's in it for both of them. I'd never be so rude about it in front of the woman though. 

[Pepper Mostly]

14 hours ago, Gigglepuff said:

 

She's going to wear a red dress so she can be like a Spanish dancing emoji???!!!

That was the high point of Cortney's story last night! My eyes rolled so hard I saw the back of my brain. Otherwise her segment was dull as dishwater. She packs. Her parents demur. She goes to the airport. Yawn.

14 hours ago, Bubbacat said:

Jesse's mom is Betsey Johnson?!?

LOL, I thought the same thing! I loved their place, though, not gonna lie.

9 hours ago, Samurai X said:

What the hell was Paul expecting? I mean he asks so earnestly too. Yes, Family Karina, let your 21-year-old daughter go to a hotel with this sweaty, creepy, pasty 34-year-old man who speaks .5 % Portuguese. They just met and they can't communicate, but oh well! I wonder If TLC wasn't there would Father Karina even let Paul into his house and kick him out to be kidnaped by pirates and/or urethra eating fish?

Darcy is such an airhead. I kind of felt bad for hearing when Hippy Dave started questioning her. It all stopped when they were in the car and she starts going on about her marriage to Jesse being a set in stone. While he sits almost flabbergasted at her constant poking. 

Courtney is dumb.

Patrick was okay until his "American women" comment.  At least he has a healthy relationship with his baby mother.

And great, next week is another "older white guy trying to get an Asian girl".

Paul gives me the creeps. He leaves Karine out in the hall for half an hour while he "decorates"! He brought her CEREAL! I don't know what goes on in this guy's mind, but he is weird and creepy in the extreme. I'm still gobsmacked over him not even troubling to learn enough conversational Portuguese to get by, or at the very least bring a phrase book. He really thinks rural people living deep in the Amazon basin know English? Poor Karine, I expected him to give her nylons and Hershey bars, like some GI in an old WWII movie. He really does think he's "saving" her. And he thinks she's a pure, simple girl (except he can't be sure she's not knocked up by some other guy, or possibly carrying STD's he's never even heard of). A pure, simple girl he can easily dazzle with the riches of the local strip mall, dollar store, and Big Lots.

6 hours ago, bethster2000 said:

It hurts me to say this as an American by birth, but why in God's name would you want to leave Holland to move to the U.S.?  Especially now?

I want Jesse's mother to come over to my house for a while, though...so she can help me redecorate my house.  I loved that funky place.

Agreed on both counts. I'd very happily go to the Netherlands for the foreseeable future. And I would be best friends with Jesse's mother, who seems sunny and fun. How she produced strait-laced, buttoned up, anal retentive Jesse is a mystery for the ages.

[MrSmith]

13 hours ago, Gigglepuff said:

I'm hoping they allowed it because it was "for the show" and because the camera crew would be around. 

Even so, the camera crew won't be there when those two are sleeping. This makes me happy I don't have children because I'd probably go to prison if someone like Paul showed up trying to date my child (daughter or son).

Edited August 28, 2017 by MrSmith

[Gigglepuff]

Aside from any physical harm, Courtney, the Spanish dancing emoji, absolutely deserves anything else that comes her way.  I hope she's taken for however many pennies she's worth and that Antonio is a catfish. I know that's not nice, but come on. She's been catfished once already. How can one feel sorry for her if it happens again? She's an idiot. 

[Madding crowd]

Jesse looks like one of those men trying to be a doll that show up on Botched. His eyebrows and rudeness would have turned me off in a minute. Darcy may look plastic and God forbid a woman of her advanced age might have something to offer anyone, but she has been nice and not rude at all so I am on her side here. I have zero idea what Jesse wants from her but he doesn't seem interested in her romantically so I cannot tell what is going on. His mother and stepfather think they are all that with their odd ball looks and the dad was rude as hell. I don't believe for a minute women through their underwear at Jesse, men maybe but not women. And to say outright that he is out of her league? Like everyone, I am just waiting for the catfish story for comic relief.

[lovesnark]

15 hours ago, Godfrey said:

They've been taking full advantage of Amsterdam's liberal drug laws. So has his barber.

Darcey needs to act her age. She's coming across as desperate to be thought of as young and hip. She's looks like a washed up biker chick or much-passed-around groupie.

This is the best description of Darcey, ever! She tries so hard to sound like she's the youngest, hippest thing.  When they were having dinner with the parents, I noticed she inserted the mandatory 'like' a half dozen times in every sentence. I will say one nice thing about her. It looked like she went with mascara instead of poorly gluing the black caterpillars to her eyelids. Less is more, Darcey. And, if you must wear false eyelashes, choose some that flatter your eyes and either have them applied or learn to glue them on so they don't come off at the corners. Also, there is nothing wrong with wearing comfortable shoes. I was hoping she'd get a heel caught in the pavers outside the parent's house and break another pair of expensive, torture to wear shoes.

I can't imagine the stench emanating from Paul after three days of travel. If he wasn't the creepiest creeper to ever creep, he would have gone to his hotel, showered and changed, then gone to Karine's home to meet her family.

Edited August 28, 2017 by lovesnark

[Cherrio]

I will refer to Cortney and her family from now on as the Ranchdips.

Sort of like the Ricechex's from Sixteen Candles.

            I heard Italy too when talking about the DJ's kid.   At least they didn't name her Turkey.

[Baltimore Betty]

So Jesse's mother is Betsy Johnson? LOL.  The step dad looks like an extra from a John Waters movie and the front yard looks like an episode of Hoarders.  

Darcey needs to shut it when it comes to rings and marriage...and children?  Who is she kidding with that nonsense? If she is 42 now and wants a kid she better talk to Asa (of Shah's of Sunset fame) and get the number of her doctor. Is there such a thing as maternity chokers?  I thought the mother showed great restraint not spewing her soup in a Danny Thomas spit take at hearing that!  Loved how Darcey said she looks younger than her age, um no, no you do not and it's not how the outside looks that gets you pregnant, it's the innards, your ovaries and uterus look 42 plus.  

Paul could not look more creepy if he tried, that girl needs to run!  What man travels to the Amazon to meet his way too young cyber girlfriend and not want to have sex? Something is not right there and it's not because of possible STD's and possible pregnancy.  Her father should have said no to Paul's request of a non sexual sleepover.  Just so wrong.  

I cannot not even put in to words how wrong that man was they showed at the end, girlfriend in the Philippines who looks like she is 15 years old with two son's in the same age range...how do these people navigate thru adulthood?  

[MrHufflepuff]

3 hours ago, poeticlicensed said:

Same for Cortney. Thank goodness a TLC crew is with her. She says she is going to stay in his apartment. For all she knows, "Antonio" might be a human trafficker.  

"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for a TV camera, I can tell you I don't have any. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for fame-whores like you. If you let Cortney go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will destroy your TV career."

[Quilty]

The big question I have is will Paul take off his jacket before intimacy?

[booboopbedoo]

1 hour ago, Gigglepuff said:

esse does live in a small space, I don't think that's such a big deal. He's 24 and that's likely one of first apartments. He's also half the age of Darcy, so I wouldn't expect that his place is as big as hers and many young European live in small spaces. It's really no different than some "starter" apartments in NYC. Cost is a huge factor for young people in Europe, so I kind of get Jesse's small space and won't pick on him for that....

Horribly expensive over there and that small flat probably costs big bucks.

She IS out of his league and while I felt for her - the truth hurts. I would do everything in my power to end the relationship if my 24 year old son( who is just starting in life) brought home a used up old bag. Kids??? Really?? At 43 years old old? Full makeup when she wakes up and the amazing language of love they speak!!

 

As for derpy dude- he creeps me out. Mental issues and probably does bad things to cats. I thought the boxes were full of gifts for the family.

49 minutes ago, Cherrio said:

  I heard Italy too when talking about the DJ's kid.   At least they didn't name her Turkey.

Or Bulgaria or Ausfahrt

[booboopbedoo]

58 minutes ago, Madding crowd said:

Jesse looks like one of those men trying to be a doll that show up on Botched. His eyebrows and rudeness would have turned me off in a minute.

I have Dutch friends and they are all very blunt - almost rude. My BFF is married to one and it took several bottles of wine before we got along and I told him what I thought of his superior attitude.We still argue but now I know he is an Ahole and all is well.

[LocalGovt]

13 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

Paul and Family Karine was one of the THE most awkward meetings ever!  However, Paul standing around grinning like a fool and the dad referring to him as a mute (talmbout 'he is gonna want something and no one will know what the mute wants) had me ki ki-ing so hard that tears started rolling down my face. 

I can. If he empties out half of REI to travel to Brazil, he is gonna pick the shelves clean at CVS, Rite Aid, and Home Depot before he has sex and it probably winds up looking something like this

The pregnancy test: Not a bad idea. Paul ain't trying to be a cuckhold like that other 90 day dude raising some other man child's.

Call me crazy but Darcy looked marginally better in some shot and at some angles at Jesse's parent's house. Look like she toned down the makeup a bit too.

This is a word I don't throw around all willy nilly but Jesse's parent's deserve it - Those are some whimsical ass people!  As a devout Simpsons fan reminds me of Ned Flanders being raised by beatniks. It is a bit overwhelming but kinda magical at the same time. Dave was hitting with some painful truths. Rude - yes. But it didn't help that Jesse started sputtering like Ralph Kramden and couldn't even answer the question or defend Darcey

Jesse's inability to answer or defend her is probably what has Darcey most in her feelings. 

Cortney: I've never had a man treat me so well.

Me: Gurl, you still haven't

This isn't even catfishing anymore. Feels more like clownfishing. I think I need gifs of her parent's standing in her bedroom watching & listening to her as she packed. Their deadpan expressions kill me.

I'm lost -- what other 90 day guy is raising someone else's child? You mean the guy from KY, with the Russian wife, who brought her son? I'm not sure that makes him a cuckold....or is there another one who got duped into thinking the child was his??  Oh....maybe you mean what I saw on the previews, about the people from PA?  The interracial couple (can't think of their names) -- anyway, the previews I saw seem to imply that she's pregnant.

[gunderda]

1 minute ago, LocalGovt said:

I'm lost -- what other 90 day guy is raising someone else's child? You mean the guy from KY, with the Russian wife, who brought her son? I'm not sure that makes him a cuckold....or is there another one who got duped into thinking the child was his??  Oh....maybe you mean what I saw on the previews, about the people from PA?  The interracial couple (can't think of their names) -- anyway, the previews I saw seem to imply that she's pregnant.

The mormon guy who's now wife is alexandra(?).  Their baby, blurred face and all, is awfully dark skinned and born after they were married. 

[spankydoll]

45 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

So Jesse's mother is Betsy Johnson? LOL.  The step dad looks like an extra from a John Waters movie and the front yard looks like an episode of Hoarders.  

Darcey needs to shut it when it comes to rings and marriage...and children?  Who is she kidding with that nonsense? If she is 42 now and wants a kid she better talk to Asa (of Shah's of Sunset fame) and get the number of her doctor. Is there such a thing as maternity chokers?  I thought the mother showed great restraint not spewing her soup in a Danny Thomas spit take at hearing that!  Loved how Darcey said she looks younger than her age, um no, no you do not and it's not how the outside looks that gets you pregnant, it's the innards, your ovaries and uterus look 42 plus.  

Paul could not look more creepy if he tried, that girl needs to run!  What man travels to the Amazon to meet his way too young cyber girlfriend and not want to have sex? Something is not right there and it's not because of possible STD's and possible pregnancy.  Her father should have said no to Paul's request of a non sexual sleepover.  Just so wrong.  

I cannot not even put in to words how wrong that man was they showed at the end, girlfriend in the Philippines who looks like she is 15 years old with two son's in the same age range...how do these people navigate thru adulthood?  

Paul is full of shit. All of the "Oh let's get to know each other before we have sex" but he has the pregnancy kit along with him. It's like those creeps who always have a rape kit in their cars.

Darcy is bananas and should be embarrassed of her behavior. Her children must be mortified.

Courtney - What is there to saw. Darwinism?  The reason that no one has settled down with her yet is that she isn't beautiful enough to outweigh the dopey way that she acts. She really seems like a sweetheart too. So happy that the crew will be with her. I half kind of expected the crew do be performing some kind of a Nevish investigation into the guys background but this show isn't Catfish. However TLC MUST have obtained an agreement from the mystery man to be on camera right?

Abby - I hope that the trade off marrying a man who you feel lukewarm about is worth leaving Haiti for.

[LocalGovt]

5 hours ago, greekmom said:

I think I've figured out why Jesse is involved with Darcey. Oedipus complex and ticket to Hollywood to become a model. There is no other reason why he would leave Holland and he did say meeting his mom is a make or break for Darcey.

I just figured he wanted to go to LA to be a star.  He probably also figured that at Darcey advanced age, they wouldn't need to worry about any little "mistakes" -- although I had my last child at 41 and 3/4's, so....age is not always a guarantee.

6 minutes ago, gunderda said:

The mormon guy who's now wife is alexandra(?).  Their baby, blurred face and all, is awfully dark skinned and born after they were married. 

OHHHH..........I didn't even know they had a child. I need to catch up! Thank you!!!

[Arwen Evenstar]

2 hours ago, Cherrio said:

Darcey, learn a lesson from Jesse when he says we Dutch are direct.    Take a pair of those wooden shoes and shove one up Jesse's ass and the other in his step-fathers.  Pack your bags and right before you leave, give ol Jesse a Dutch oven as a parting gift.

I was not expecting that. I was laughing so hysterically that my husband ran up the stairs to ask if I was ok. Glad I wasn't eating or drinking anything or I would have snotted it all over my tablet.  Dutch oven..LOL.  

She wouldn't even have to fart, just smother him in a cloud of cheap perfume.

[Former Nun]

3 hours ago, poeticlicensed said:

In what twisted mind is that a thing to give a woman and in the next breath you ask to take an STD and pregnancy test?

Uhhhh...Paul's?

[poeticlicensed]

7 minutes ago, spankydoll said:

Courtney - What is there to saw. Darwinism?  The reason that no one has settled down with her yet is that she isn't beautiful enough to outweigh the dopey way that she acts. She really seems like a sweetheart too. So happy that the crew will be with her. I half kind of expected the crew do be performing some kind of a Nevish investigation into the guys background but this show isn't Catfish. However TLC MUST have obtained an agreement from the mystery man to be on camera right?

The Catfish playbook dictates that catfish generally fall into one of four categories

• a grifter who is trying to get money out of the catfishee
• the catfish ends up being the same sex as the catfishee and is closeted, therefore catfishing people on the interwebs how they have relationships
• the catfish has some physical or mental issue (e.g. morbid obesity, developmental problems) that make catfishing for love attractive to them
• catfish who just like to screw with people

One can only guess what's going on with Cortney and "Antonio". 

[Baltimore Betty]

I imagine the man Courtney is really meeting is a Paul like man.  Her parents looked so deflated to watch their child get on an airplane bound for more ridiculousness.  How do they let her even leave the house?   

The reason that no one has settled down with her yet is that she isn't beautiful enough to outweigh the dopey way that she acts.  That and the fact she is not looking for the person inside, Antonio's packaging is pretty darn hot but someone who will not communicate with you seems shady, like he has cast a large net looking for someone to be a gigolo for.  

Once again, what makes these people want to make their lives so unbelievably difficult?

[LocalGovt]

Karine actually looked disappointed when Paul said last night, "no intimacy until we know each other better."  Not so sure she's a virgin. If she is, she's one of the most edgy virgins out there.  The photos of her are very provocative.  I know someone who found his wife in much the same way Paul is doing (she was from the Philippines, but working in Singapore).  It's a way of life there -- many young women are trying to lift their families out of abject poverty by marrying a "rich" American. I think they think we're all rich. Maybe compared to them, our lifestyles seem that way. Anyway, this guy was not rich by any stretch of the imagination.  He's a bit of a loon, as well (which I tend to think most men in that situation are- they know not many American women will put up with their weird ideas or fetishes, so they look abroad).

[Nancybeth]

I've seen a lot of creepy things on the 90 days franchise, but by far the creepiest was Paul proudly showing off that little girl bed, with stuffed animals and a unicorn bedspread in one moment, and then telling Karine he wanted her to get an STD and pregnancy test in the next. 

[gunderda]

24 minutes ago, LocalGovt said:

 

OHHHH..........I didn't even know they had a child. I need to catch up! Thank you!!!

Go to the TLC go website and it's like "90 day fiance - now what?" or something like that.  There's 1-2 clips for a few couples and they are one of them.  

[orangeiguana]

1 hour ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Darcey needs to shut it when it comes to rings and marriage...and children?

It's possible -- even probable -- she froze some eggs.

[bichonblitz]

Oh, come on, now. Jesse's parents and that house was just a big ole' joke, right? RIGHT? 

That red ruby stepdaddy had screwed in to his nose looked like a bloody zit.  His parents were disgusting. Actually, Jesse is out of their league! 

[tincansailor981]

"How do I know what the mute wants?"  That line still has me laughing my ass off.   

[happy hobo]

47 minutes ago, orangeiguana said:

It's possible -- even probable -- she froze some eggs.

Aren't Chinese Hundred Year (Old) Eggs a delicacy? 

Her boobs wouldn't give milk.....they'd put out yogurt

[Cherrio]

19 minutes ago, happy hobo said:

they'd put out yogurt

At least she is cultured.

[happy hobo]

2 minutes ago, Cherrio said:

At least she is cultured.

a PEARL is cultured. .....she's manufactured.

[Cherrio]

I am hoping Paul (or Paulie) Oh you won't be seeing him again (The Godfather) just vanishes.

His mother calls and calls and the father keeps saying.,..."He got a job at "Amazon".

Paul calls out for help during the murder, but the skeevy idiot should of learned their language.

All that is left is a yellowing paper towel with some disgusting hair in it floating near the "boatdock".

3 minutes ago, happy hobo said:

a PEARL is cultured

Not if she is Minnie

[Desert Rat]

3 hours ago, Cherrio said:

Ok, I was going to read all the posts before I wrote anything, but stopped at this one.    YES !

 Jesse is rude, bossy and not very nice in my book, plus I do not find him much to look at.  And that coat?  Did he borrow it from mommy?

I feel sorry for Darcey too.  Yes, she is an over done, garish and hideously dressed woman and desperate.  But she isn't mean, rude and demanding.

Geesh, that asshole has her riding a bike right after a very long and exhausting trip, then over to his hoarder parents house the next day. Go here, do this, do that, don't do this, don't do that. 

His stepfather is a cruel piece of shit.  Out of her league?    Uh, as another poster pointed out, he lives in a Ikea closet.   He doesn't have a league as far as I can see.  Darcey on the other hand has a successful business, a nice home and a family.

Darcey, learn a lesson from Jesse when he says we Dutch are direct.    Take a pair of those wooden shoes and shove one up Jesse's ass and the other in his step-fathers.  Pack your bags and right before you leave, give ol Jesse a Dutch oven as a parting gift.

I guess this what is meant by the term "Dutch treat[ment]."

[Desert Rat]

Interesting how different Jesse lives compared to his mom.  Jesse has the super small, but highly organized apartment, decorated all in white and grey.  Sterile and boring, like Jesse.  OTO, Mom's place is eclectic and fun, a fantastic assortment of colors and shapes and textures. It made me a bit dizzy, but I loved it.  

[kendi]

15 hours ago, spankydoll said:

I think that any millennials live at home until a later age. Her parents clearly adore her. And don't forget the dip!

I could not stop laughing when they talked about Courtney missing the ranch dip for pretzels! What a highlight!

Darcey is so hard to watch. The desperation is so thick. Asking him about his Facebook status (so important!), hints about rings, picking out names for children, wearing so much make-up and stupid heels...it's embarassing! Plus she KNEW he was a fitness freak, I thought she would try to even get a bit fit, loose a few pounds or something. Watching her ride a bike was pure comedy---and only 55 calories!

I don't know if she's an identical twin but her twin looked much "softer" and attractive.

Paul is just skeevy. And holding on to a lock of his mama's hair. 

[MrSmith]

1 hour ago, LocalGovt said:

OHHHH..........I didn't even know they had a child. I need to catch up! Thank you!!!

Yeah, there are some pictures floating around in the thread about them on these forums.

[Pepper Mostly]

3 hours ago, lovesnark said:

This is the best description of Darcey, ever! She tries so hard to sound like she's the youngest, hippest thing.  When they were having dinner with the parents, I noticed she inserted the mandatory 'like' a half dozen times in every sentence. I will say one nice thing about her. It looked like she went with mascara instead of poorly gluing the black caterpillars to her eyelids. Less is more, Darcey. And, if you must wear false eyelashes, choose some that flatter your eyes and either have them applied or learn to glue them on so they don't come off at the corners. Also, there is nothing wrong with wearing comfortable shoes. I was hoping she'd get a heel caught in the pavers outside the parent's house and break another pair of expensive, torture to wear shoes.

 

The thing is, she could dress youthfully, stylishly, even trendily and look great. She has a nice figure. But she insists on dressing like a 15 year old! The ripped jeans with heels! If she'd tone it down she'd look ten years younger, easily. The dark hair, the fillers, the trowled-on makeup and the completely inappropriate, middle-schooler-at-the-mall clothes make her look ten years older!

[EastCoast4Life]

Quote

The big question I have is will Paul take off his jacket before intimacy?

And reveal the world's two tiniest sloping shoulders and concave chest? He will probably keep that jacket on. Paul looks like you could snap him half with extreme ease. I hope Father Karine does just that! He is a creep, and those Dollar Store stuffed animals... I just... go home Paul. 

Oh Darcy. "I still look sort of young." You do? You really think this about yourself? You have black extensions that reach your ass. You have more fillers and plastic in your face than most people. You like to sleep in false eyelashes. Yeah, sure you look soooo young. Almost like someone who could have a baby in the future!

[booboopbedoo]

2 hours ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

I was not expecting that. I was laughing so hysterically that my husband ran up the stairs to ask if I was ok. Glad I wasn't eating or drinking anything or I would have snotted it all over my tablet.  Dutch oven..LOL.  

I watched it twice and laughed with glee!

[MrSmith]

14 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

The thing is, she could dress youthfully, stylishly, even trendily and look great. She has a nice figure. But she insists on dressing like a 15 year old! The ripped jeans with heels! If she'd tone it down she'd look ten years younger, easily. The dark hair, the fillers, the trowled-on makeup and the completely inappropriate, middle-schooler-at-the-mall clothes make her look ten years older!

It's kind of amazing how clothes can affect how old you look, isn't it? I haven't gotten to watch this episode, yet, but from the last episode ... her ripped jeans are way too ripped. They're also too small. And while men like the look of women in pumps, she's got to be smart about it. Stop wearing them when it's not appropriate, such as when you're walking around cobblestone streets.