S09.E07: Bidding on Love

[BBHN]

Nothing to do with scrutiny. Just the image she chooses to present to the world. She was doing it long before people were questioning her and Tom's motives, and before Tom was caught swapping spit in a hotel lounge with a woman who wasn't his fiance.

[UsernameFatigue]

9 minutes ago, ryebread said:

 

Loads of defenders of Carole and Adam.  Now, and back then when Lu was calling Carole a 'pedafile'.

Everyone who has commented so far on Chad and Tinsley seem grossed out by them. 

Just wondering where the threshold for the gross is. 

Personally, I don't care about Tins. She has been on the show for what, 6 episodes? (Since I don't think she was on the first one). Carole had been on for a few seasons and I got to know her. Her relationship with Adam developed slowly, and dare I say normally. Tins OTOH seems desperate for a storyline, and who knows  if we will ever even see this guy again? I have no problem with older women/younger men relationships. However Tins seemed to have picked this guy because he looks young enough to be carded, and because she apparently still thinks she is an "it" girl instead of what she is, a "has been" woman. Its pathetic, and boring to boot. 

[CatMomma]

8 minutes ago, ryebread said:

 

Loads of defenders of Carole and Adam.  Now, and back then when Lu was calling Carole a 'pedafile'.

Everyone who has commented so far on Chad and Tinsley seem grossed out by them. 

Just wondering where the threshold for the gross is. 

Speaking for myself, I have no problem with Tinsley going on a date with a younger man.  For me, it felt uncomfortable because there was no chemistry and I don't need to see them making out. I freely admit it was gross. I would say that about any couple, no matter the age gap. 

From what I've seen, she wasn't called a pedophile. Granted, I haven't read every post but if she was, it was out of line.  

[Yours Truly]

30 minutes ago, CatMomma said:

Didn't the woman who dated Tom say that he made it clear they were exclusive? I thought she said he told her she was the only one. It's one thing to be honest, quite another to imply one thing and do another.

Whatever. Don't really care. Lu seems okay with the set up, so I can't quite find it in myself to give a shit. However, anyone who has watched this show from the beginning might find Lu a bit hypocritical. She set herself up as the judgment police who was all about class and behavior. Her comments toward Carole as a pedophile were especially vile. Guess nobody is allowed to judge her relationship, but she has no problem doing it to others.

She is rewriting history. It's okay to be sexually free, as long as an older woman isn't with a younger man. That is some sexist shit right there. She can't demand that the women be happy for her, all the while judging Carole's relationship. 

See I definitely could have missed it.

I dunno I feel like SOME of these women had similar experiences as Sonja and Ramona and we saw how they determined their connection to Tom as EXTENSIVE.... (eyeroll)

I mean if I hear some concrete, pulled the wool over multiple womens eyes through breaking official ongoing commitments then shit. That's fucked up but I'm not convinced that being a misleading asshole was his MO. <Shrug>

Not trying to excuse Tom or anything but at the same time I'm tired of playing the field being equated to not having a moral compass. In the dating game it really is easy to pin bad behavior on one another cause there is a lot of uncertainty and nothing set in stone AND the path to considering setting things in stone is a very awkward one. When I was younger I used to demand a label pretty quickly cause I didn't want the aggravation of guessing at expectations and what I could and couldn't be mad about. etc. etc. As an older woman I understand more about boundaries, liberties and the luxuries that are supposed to come with NOT being in an exclusive relationship. People tend to apply more expectations on dating than is actually appropriate and that's where things get cloudy. Just look at all the leaps Ramona and Sonja were making based off of very minimal interaction with Tom and NO commitment. Come on. Sadly this happens often and a lot of the time it's women who don't navigate dating well. That's all I'm trying to point out.

This is why I'm not too inclined to believe that Tom was prowling around the UES PREYING on woman. I find that description absurd.  And a bit offensive to women as if women are so powerless in these matters. Give me a break.

Edited May 18, 2017 by Yours Truly

[BBHN]

Quote

This is why I'm not too inclined to believe that Tom was prowling around the UES PREYING on woman. I find that description absurd.  And a bit offensive to women as if women are so powerless in these matters. Give me a break.

That's more offensive to Tom, not women.

[ZaldamoWilder]

9 minutes ago, ryebread said:

 

Loads of defenders of Carole and Adam.  Now, and back then when Lu was calling Carole a 'pedafile'.

Everyone who has commented so far on Chad and Tinsley seem grossed out by them. 

Just wondering where the threshold for the gross is. 

So, what's weird for me is that it doesn't bother me one bit that France's newly elected President is married to a woman 25 years his senior.  I actually like him more because of it.  Not speaking for anyone else here.   It's not the idea of age gaps that I find gross (and I haven't actually expressed as much wrt Tinsely and Chad) and it also isn't gender specific to me, I don't care who's older.   My thing is how chronologically and experientially close the May in the May December is to childhood.   Chronologically Adam and Chad are only 5 years apart, but I don't think of Adam as a kid.  He's a dude with not just a job, but a career.  At 28, he has had potentially at least one long term relationship under his belt so to speak.  That's a fully grown man.   Chad isn't old enough to have had a long term anything, nevermind girlfriend.  Technically?  Sure, but we'd have to go back to high school for it to count.  

The bartender at Bowlmor wouldn'tve carded Adam.  If you're with a man or woman that must prove they're of legal drinking age because they look like they could actually be younger, that is my threshold.    That and the inequitable dynamic of sexually dominant versus inexperienced one couple is against the other being pretty much in the same place physically.    Their ages don't bother me, everyone's grown.   They're in different places.

[psychoticstate]

7 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

If what Barbara said was true, that is really, really sad. Who is more pathetic, Lu or Ramona? Lu would rather be married to a man who makes very little effort to hide his extracurricular activities than be alone? Her friends know and pity her. Argh. 

If true, this is very sad.  Lu is an attractive, stylish woman who should be able to attract nice men.  I hope she didn't marry Tom on principle because that rarely ends well. 

6 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Did we really need Carole's TH telling us how poor Bethenny is going through hell with her divorce? Why is she speaking for Bethenny so much this season? Get a life, Carole and go back to climbing rocks. 

We all know that Bethenny can certainly speak for herself.  Carole most definitely does not need to be her spokesperson.   And while her divorce does sound like a mess, at least she wasn't worrying about finances.  I too had the glaring ex for two months after we split and it was extremely uncomfortable.  I wasn't in a spacious NY apartment and wasn't rolling in bank that allowed me to go live in a hotel or just rent/buy another place.  Suggesting that Dennis had pined away for her for years, while married to her friend, is just gross. If true, what a winner. 

Maybe Bethenny should return the favor and explain the living situation between Carole and Adam.  When she was talking to her friend during the rock climbing, I was hoping that Adam already knew that Carole basically wanted him out and that she considered the relationship done.  Otherwise?  Ouch.

[LilaFowler]

I think it's interesting that the women who are screeching the loudest about Lu's situation with Tom are the ones who are guilty of unconventional personal lives themselves. Ramona: there have been reports that Mario had cheated for years but it only became an issue when he got serious with someone. I think Sonja and Luann have known about his infidelity for a long time as well. Ramona stayed in the marriage and didn't flounce out like the strong, indignant woman that she wants Luann to be. Bethenny: married a stage-five clinger psycho loser for tv purposes. Flaunted it until it was impossible to ignore anymore and now is using him/his absence to garner sympathy. Gloats about how her still-married boyfriend pined for her during his marriage. Newsflash Beth: if that's how he treats his wife of many years, how will he treat YOU eventually? Sonja: lost her rich husband because she was out partying and wouldn't return home when he became ill. As of last season was still doing a regular walk of shame with any and every busboy and mid-level banker on the UES who would have her.

Meanwhile, Carole and Dorinda, both of whom have actually had pretty stable love lives on the show, have said basically nothing. I don't think Carole was necessarily fishing for what Barbara stupidly revealed to her last night, and I say that as someone who doesn't really like Carole.

Ramona is just so fucking bitter. She can pretend that she loves her new girl about town single life but I think she would take Mario back in a nanosecond if she could. Same with Sonja and old man Morgan. Bethenny will never, ever be truly happy so she doesn't count here. I think envy is behind Ramona and Sonja's continued harping on this subject. Luann knows that he's been unfaithful and doesn't care. Drop it.

Edited May 18, 2017 by LilaFowler

[Yours Truly]

19 minutes ago, BBHN said:

That's more offensive to Tom, not women.

Yes to women cause apparently women are too stupid to recognize a known player in a very small circle or they do recognize it and even with that knowledge seem to easily believe he's dating them exclusively...

It's rather ridiculous to believe that he's run around town fooling all these women. Which is why I don't necessarily believe all the hype.

What seems more logical to me is that these women were more in the know than some may want to claim and the disappointment, when it went nowhere, morphed into sour grapes. <cough Sonja <cough>

Edited May 18, 2017 by Yours Truly

[BBHN]

Preying on women makes him sound like a sexual skeeze. Like, gross. Super horny sex hunter is worse to me than being naive when it comes to not recognizing obvious player when player is hunting...er, playing.

Edited May 18, 2017 by BBHN

[KungFuBunny]

Dorinda/Carole/Barbara:

D – I bid a $1000

C – Oh, Dorinda that’s nice!

B – You bid a $1000?

D – Yes, cause it’s a charity

B-àC  - Dorinda just bid $1000

C – Yeah, that’s good. Teeth whitening, that’s expensive

B – I know like so many dentists

B – What about down there?

C – Um brushes, mumbling…  What are you doing for Christmas?

B – I’m going to see my mom, then I’m going to Luann’s wedding

C – Are you excited?

B – Honestly, no.

C – Is she excited?

B – Honestly? I think she has something to prove.

C – To prove what?

B – She’d rather go through with it and divorce than call it off.

C – What about him?

B – There’s so many rumors that he hangs at The Regency and still hooks up with women.

B – That’s pathetic.

C – Does she know that?

B – I told her

C – She could be making the biggest mistake of her life

[ZaldamoWilder]

7 minutes ago, LilaFowler said:

Gloats about how her still-married boyfriend pined for her during his marriage.

Thanks girl, I forgot to get at this earlier.    I heard her say this (paraphrasing):   I've known Dennis for years, he dated a friend of mine from school.  He and his wife broke up and he called to tell me had feelings for me.  He's been supportive of me for a long time but I didn't think of him like that, he was just Dennis. 

Real question, no snark - if my recount is close to accurate, why do ya'll think what Beth said was he'd had feelings for her his whole marriage? (as opposed to present day).

[BBHN]

Quote

Real question, no snark - if my recount is close to accurate, why do ya'll think what Beth said was he'd had feelings for her his whole marriage? (as opposed to present day).

She was munching on crackers when she said it?

[Lemons]

2 hours ago, msblossom said:

The cringey scene with Tinsley, Ramona and Sonja chatting up and flirting with young guys at the pick up bar was OTT embarrassing and desperate  And I loved that Avery, not so subtly, attempted to convey to Ramona that she is a try-too-hard old woman. I'm sure it's not the first time either. Listen to your daughter, Ramona! And Chad needs to drop Tinsley and go for someone more like Avery. 

Avery nailed it when she said Ramona was trying too hard to look young and she came off as desperate. Then they show Avery trying on sunglasses that make her look super cute and Ramona tries them on and looks like mr Magoo. 

I actually like watching the bar scenes with a mix of horror and fascination. I wonder if Ramona and company realize that these guys are drawn to the cameras, not them. I thought I detected a note of revulsion when Tinsley kissed Chad. 

[Leroux]

4 minutes ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

Thanks girl, I forgot to get at this earlier.    I heard her say this (paraphrasing):   I've known Dennis for years, he dated a friend of mine from school.  He and his wife broke up and he called to tell me had feelings for me.  He's been supportive of me for a long time but I didn't think of him like that, he was just Dennis. 

Real question, no snark - if my recount is close to accurate, why do ya'll think what Beth said was he'd had feelings for her his whole marriage? (as opposed to present day).

 

I didn't think about it like that. 

Sometimes you are emotionally or physically attracted to someone when you are young and want to take the next step but the other person just doesn't feel the same. Life goes on, paths take you on different directions and then 30 years later a chance presents itself. 

IMO Dennis got separated/divorced and he started thinking about the "one who got away" and Bethenny was also separating/divorce so he made a move and they reconnected. He probably told her that he liked her since their younger days which doesn't mean that he has been pinning for her and never loved his wife. 

IMO Dennis has always been a friend to Bethenny but when his marriage was over and Bethenny's was as well, then he decided to take the next step. Now , let's not forget that before Dennis Bethenny was in a relationship of about a year with another guy, so it is not like Bethenny ended her marriage because of Dennis and I don't think Dennis ended his marriage because of Bethenny either.

They are still friends so I doubt there is hard feelings about the break up. Sometimes a great friendship is better than a failed relationship. 

[Booger666]

15 hours ago, AttackTurtle said:

Tinsley needs to flee Sonja's place (if she's ever really actually stayed there).  Sonja knows Tinsley is prettier & rich....Tinsley is in a no win situation and the preview for next week may be the end of any affection that remained in me for Sonja.

At least Tinsley's smart enough not to stay at a five star hotel and melodramatically drone on and on about her being homeless ... I'm looking at you Bethenny. 

[lezlers]

15 hours ago, BusyOctober said:

Wow, I didn't think Bethenny could be any more of an egomaniac.  Way to make freakin' charity events all about YOU, B. As a divorced mom- who is also a millionaire businesswoman with multiple NYC apartments, a house in the Hamptons, designer clothes, toys and food for herself and her child, able to jet off on weekend helicopter ski trips like the rest of us go to the grocery store, and has several TV shows to her name, I think you are definitely the person to show others that the struggle is real. The gals down at the shelter will feel as if they are looking in a mirror as they hear your story! Please...

And nice nonchalant mention of how much Dennis admired and desired you for.all.those.years he was married to your friend. It was so easily & naturally slipped into her conversation, we hardly even noticed. Not.  Some people are name droppers. Bethenny is a self adulation dropper. BTW, Dennis and Tom had better not stand next to each other at the next cocktail party, or else B may take the wrong doppelgänger home that night. Then she can add her name to Tom's Been There Done That list.

Tinsley is entitled to date who ever, but I hope they will stop showing her trolling for teens in the future. It's really rather icky.  Maybe Dorinda's human trafficking cause should do more to help the young victims wandering the streets after a night in Sonja's Menopause Manor?  

I actually thought Bethanny seemed really genuine at the fundraiser.  Guess that just goes to show that we all see the actions of people through different lenses, based on our pre-existing feelings towards those people.  I also felt she was more than qualified to tell her story.  Yeah, she's rich and successful now but she didn't START that way.  She struggled and hustled and made a name for herself.  She's no Tinsley Mortimer, whose only claim to fame is being born to the right parents.

Ramona is the worst.  How is she not embarrassed being filmed flirting with men young enough to be her grandson who are likely just humoring the crazy old lady hanging all over them like a cheap jacket.  Good lord please don't find me in my sixties trolling for men in bars like I'm 22.  Shudder.

[HunterHunted]

5 hours ago, twilightzone said:

I don't know why Tinsley was cast.  She adds nothing to the show.  She really has no storyline and at best, should just be "friend" status.  I can't see her beyond this season.

It's just so hard to explain how big Tinsley was at the height of her fame and influence. It was hard to look at any publication that even tangentially covered the New York social scene and not see a picture of her or see her name mentioned. Tinsley is the exact type of person that the show would have loved to cast at the outset. She was it. It took maybe 2 months of her missing parties and charity events for people to realize that she and Topper had split. That being said, she was never a very interesting person and after the High Society and Nico disasters, I'm sure Tinsley is really careful about how she comes across.

[motorcitymom65]

2 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

I'm not actually inclined to believe that he pledges to women. Some women are quick to jump into monogamous dating assumptions. A lot of women assume that the dating stage is a monogamous affair.

There is something about the situation that reads completely corny with regards to these other women in Tom's life. He seems to be known as a player and when he came on the scene it looked like he was a serial dater just like Lu and now we are supposed to believe that he goes around pretending to be in relationships with various women all at once? I don't buy it. I can buy that he dates women and doesn't find the need to offer a list of other women he is currently dating and doesn't freely disclose this detail. I get that that's supposed to be viewed as underhanded but in all honesty I date. I don't share what I do on my time away from anyone I may be seeing with them. I may be seeing someone else and going on dates. My thing is unless we've moved on from dinner, texting, talking on the phone and even knocking boots here and there and into a more day in day out routine where we then decide on our status we ain't in a relationship and I'm free to do the exact same thing with anyone else in my life WITHOUT your knowledge.

 

My interpretation is that Lu isn't bothered by it, not that she's some out of her mind broad with marbles running around upstairs. I expect she doesn't really fancy the idea of having to wear a huge sign around theirs necks with a line by line description of their marriage so she rather just keep the detail simple. Which are they are getting married, they are in love and she's very happy. Anything is too much work to hash out for judgmental people who want to take jabs. 

 

But what more proof do we need than what we saw last season? Lu seemed to think they were exclusive. He put a ring on it. Then he cheated on her. Why is it so hard to believe this dude tends to give women the impression that they are exclusive when he is still getting some on the side? We saw it with Lu, then the gal with Ramona said the same thing on camera. That she thought they were exclusive and then she saw him with Lu. I don't believe everything I hear or see, but think that where there is smoke there is usually fire. 

On the second bolded point, again, where is there any proof of this? Any proof that she isn't bothered by it? She sure seemed bothered last season when she ran from the room when Beth showed her the pictures and Lu said she was going to throw up. Bothered when she screamed at him on the phone. Bothered and insulted when Beth asked her if they were going to have an open marriage.  Bothered in the press she did later where she said she was hurt, shocked, and went into a bit of depression over the cheating.Bothered this season in the first episode when she said if he ever cheated again she would lob his balls off. I think that is the thing about all of this - many are discussing two different things. Some don't understand why the ladies don't leave it alone because Lu seems fine with it so they just need to let it go. Others see a woman who has declared vehemently that she is not OK with it and would be devastated if it happened again.

So wha to believe? What Lu tells us, or what we believe based on her previous behavior? This is the problem with being a big fat liar and a pretender. Folks just don't know what to believe, and even folks that like her, seem to not believe her when she says she would never tolerate such behavior. 

[ghoulina]

1 hour ago, robroy said:

Actually Ramona was willing to stay in the marriage. Mario basically left. That other girl was no longer a piece on the side. And the others made it clear he had cheated before. We've basically seem how rudderless Ramona is without a husband.

Co-sign. I think Ramona would have jumped at a chance to marry if Tom had offered HER the ring. And I think she would have stayed with Mario if her apologized and tried to make things right. I did get the impression that he probably wanted out before his affair was brought to light, and even more so once it was. Moving on after ANY affair would be hard, but Ramona would be the type to make it a living nightmare. 

 

1 hour ago, ryebread said:

There's a 22 year age gap between Carole and Adam.  And an 18 year gap between Tinsley and Chad.

Why does it seem like we are so much more tolerant of Carole and Adam? Is it the difference between 23 (Chad) and 28 (Adam) when they met their older ladies?  

Or is it because Adam and Carole have spared us a close-up of them swapping gum?

What is an acceptable age for a male to be, for a woman 18 years+ his senior to date?  Where's your personal cut off?  I have a college age son so my answer is 35. 

As long as all those involved are of legal age, I don't really give a fuck. But....when I'm watching other people, I have a natural tendency to put myself in their shoes. Tinsley and her beau kind of squicked me out. He looked SO young, to me. For me, personally, (and I'm married, so this is hypothetical) if I could be your mom, it ain't happening. Same if you could be my dad. 

I do think the older you get, the less age differences make me uncomfortable. Sure Carole and Adam's difference is larger, but he's closer to 30 and for some reason that buys them a bit more grace. I can't really explain it better than that. It's just a visceral reaction. Again, I'm not saying there's anything WRONG going on, just not what I'm into. 

Also, I've had more time to get used to Carole and Adam. They clearly have something going, as they've been together for years. Tinsley seemed like she just wanted to giggle like a sorority girl again and swap food with a baby bird. Ew. 

[Giselle]

Episode 7 didn't record for me. It's not playing again anytime this week nor in the current seasons reruns leading up to episode 8 next week. All it says between episode 6 and 8 is "To Be Announced". Mmmmm, doesn't even show up in the list of episodes.

DId this happen to anybody else?

[notnowimbusy]

WTF is wrong with Ramona?  Not only is she looking crazier than before, but this over selling of how glorious her new found freedom is, is beyond nuts.   She's somehow even louder, more obnoxious and as much as she trying, she's looking older - much older.   In her TH that hair looks so greasy and strange, and is it me or what's up with the bloodshot eyes!   Sorry, but she is just plain embarrassing at the bars. 

[Atlanta]

I've never lived in NYC and have been married for a long time so I'm a bit clueless. I know it's tougher for single women over 40, but is there no place for these women to meet age-appropriate men? I'm not saying that people with age gaps can't make it work, but it seems it would be more difficult since you are at different stages and life experiences. You need to be able to bond and get each other. Additionally, there's the issue if the younger wants kids eventually and older can't or doesn't. It could be a case of the woman being too old to get pregnant or older man having already dealt with diapers and doesn't want to deal with it again. Do no NYC men want to be with a woman over 40?  

[jaync]

Frederick sold Beth's apartment, so now she's an expert at flipping real estate? Her sense of self-importance is so laughable.

Quote

Speaking of, husbands don't "break up" with their wives, they divorce them. Isn't he still living at home too?

If so, then Beth is his side piece/mistress, and thus should keep her piehole closed about the SOs and relationships of others.

Quote

Why is she speaking for Bethenny so much this season?

Carole's been doing that for the past three seasons. Maybe it just stands out more now since Beth's therapist and disguised friend haven't been around to do the same.

John's looking good.

[zoeysmom]

14 minutes ago, Giselle said:

Episode 7 didn't record for me. It's not playing again anytime this week nor in the current seasons reruns leading up to episode 8 next week. All it says between episode 6 and 8 is "To Be Announced". Mmmmm, doesn't even show up in the list of episodes.

DId this happen to anybody else?

It plays Friday at 12:10 pm.  3:00 pm on Sunday.

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

The Devil's In The Details On RHONYC

This week's episode is the Sistine Chapel of banality. And yes, this season's about Tom, too.

[zoeysmom]

In Miami there was a scene, and I can't place it where Tom is being discussed at reference is made to him dating a woman, (I believe named Barbara) who was wealthier than Luann and was living off her largess.  It was being used to buttress the Tm is poor and dates women of a certain age UES women of means.  I am wondering if it is the same Barbara that was talking to Carole. 

Carole wrote a very supportive blog for Barbara the blabbermouth.  Why do these people put themselves in such a bad light by talking about other people's relationships?  It is not because they care or are concerned, they are basically just rotten people.

[BBHN]

Quote

Frederick sold Beth's apartment, so now she's an expert at flipping real estate?

Some people are just quicker learners than others, I guess.

[Martinigirl]

WOW! Carole is sticking up for Barbara big time!!!

[ryebread]

17 minutes ago, lezlers said:

Good lord please don't find me in my sixties trolling for men in bars like I'm 22.  Shudder.

The Detroit and Windsor, Ontario people, here, might be familiar with Jobbie Nooner?  For those not in the know, 10,000+ boats get together for a big raft off at an island in Lake St. Clair.  100,000+ people, bikinis, booze, music, debauchery.  As a teenager, a 20 something and even into my early 30s, I went.  But it's changed. Or maybe I have.  Seems sleezier and younger. LOL.  Last weekend, my hubs and our friends talked about all of us going this year and I said, "Dude, we will be the old people that, we, as young people used to point and laugh at." Sad but true. 

But yeah, your post made me think, "Good lord, please don't find me at Jobbie Nooner in my sixties."

I know age shouldn't matter, but there comes a time in life when it's best to leave the shenanigans of olde' to the youngsters.  Now get off my lawn.

[Lemons]

2 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

Thank you!!!!!

This  need to paint women as such clueless victims is so infuriating.

Giving Tom so much credit and all those poor poor women he deceived our sympathies or disdain as in Lu's case.

 

Whose giving Tom credit?  All he did was date the numerous amount of single women of a certain age available in the upper east side. He doesn't get any credit. 

These women aren't victims. They are desperate to have a man. The problem is they are practically inbred in the upper east side. They don't appear to mingle outside of their area code. Bethany is right when she makes fun of these crusty upper east side women who lunch. They live in the least diverse neighborhood in NYC. If they left the upper east side they might realize that there are a lot of decent men out there. A whole lot better than Tom. And Harry!  How is he considered a catch?

[Jezebel97]

43 minutes ago, motorcitymom65 said:

But what more proof do we need than what we saw last season? Lu seemed to think they were exclusive. He put a ring on it. Then he cheated on her. Why is it so hard to believe this dude tends to give women the impression that they are exclusive when he is still getting some on the side? We saw it with Lu, then the gal with Ramona said the same thing on camera. That she thought they were exclusive and then she saw him with Lu. I don't believe everything I hear or see, but think that where there is smoke there is usually fire. 

On the second bolded point, again, where is there any proof of this? Any proof that she isn't bothered by it? She sure seemed bothered last season when she ran from the room when Beth showed her the pictures and Lu said she was going to throw up. Bothered when she screamed at him on the phone. Bothered and insulted when Beth asked her if they were going to have an open marriage.  Bothered in the press she did later where she said she was hurt, shocked, and went into a bit of depression over the cheating.Bothered this season in the first episode when she said if he ever cheated again she would lob his balls off. I think that is the thing about all of this - many are discussing two different things. Some don't understand why the ladies don't leave it alone because Lu seems fine with it so they just need to let it go. Others see a woman who has declared vehemently that she is not OK with it and would be devastated if it happened again.

So wha to believe? What Lu tells us, or what we believe based on her previous behavior? This is the problem with being a big fat liar and a pretender. Folks just don't know what to believe, and even folks that like her, seem to not believe her when she says she would never tolerate such behavior. 

you conveyed my thoughts perfectly

I don't think it's so "c'est la vie" with the Wife formerly known as Countess 

but she will bounce back & land on her feet

[ladle]

14 hours ago, BBHN said:

Good thing Dennis wasn't at the wedding...Luanne might have said "I do!" to the wrong guy.

She still did!  (*rimshot*). 

[ryebread]

1 minute ago, Lemons said:

Whose giving Tom credit?  All he did was date the numerous amount of single women of a certain age available in the upper east side. He doesn't get any credit. 

These women aren't victims. They are desperate to have a man. The problem is they are practically inbred in the upper east side. They don't appear to mingle outside of their area code. Bethany is right when she makes fun of these crusty upper east side women who lunch. They live in the least diverse neighborhood in NYC. If they left the upper east side they might realize that there are a lot of decent men out there. A whole lot better than Tom. And Harry!  How is he considered a catch?

I agree with most of your post however, I have to defend the ladies of the UES.   Although I will agree it's probably one of the least diverse areas of the city.  But I've met snobs and desperate people who only mingle with their own, all over Manhattan.  Even before Soho became ultra trendy, I knew a woman and her snobby friends who fancied themselves so special and bohemian that they claimed/bragged they got nosebleeds if they ventured north of 9th St.  The Gramercy Park crowd is unto themselves, also.  Almost everyone looked down on the Bridge and Tunnel crowd.  But the inbrededness (is that a word? LOL) is everywhere.  The UES just seems crustier because it's more established.  Or was.  Don't know anymore.

I'm surprised the newly hip Ramona didn't sell her UES apartment and move downtown.  She's so edgy, now, and all.

[chewycandy]

1 hour ago, lezlers said:

Ramona is the worst.  How is she not embarrassed being filmed flirting with men young enough to be her grandson who are likely just humoring the crazy old lady hanging all over them like a cheap jacket.  Good lord please don't find me in my sixties trolling for men in bars like I'm 22.  Shudder.

That's all they're doing, humoring her--and having hugs forced on them! It's sad to watch.

[Giselle]

42 minutes ago, zoeysmom said:

It plays Friday at 12:10 pm.  3:00 pm on Sunday.

Thanks ZM! Just remembered I could watch it online and am doing that now.

I appreciate you checking and will set it to record.

Thanks again!

[Martinigirl]

Bowling for Cougar- bine. LMAO!!! WWC

[ryebread]

21 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

WOW! Carole is sticking up for Barbara big time!!!

I kind of did earlier today, too.  Me and Carole are likethis.  But back to Barbara, although she should have known better, I figured she'd probably had a few drinks, the cameras weren't on her and she forgot Carole was mic'd just like Carole said in her blog.  They all forget, Carole says.  I believe her. 

Just this once, though. ;-)

[jaync]

Quote

She struggled and hustled and made a name for herself. 

But, was she ever without the means to do her hustling? That she compared the "crisis" of her divorce to the real battles of those in need was insulting AF.

[Natalie68]

9 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

If what Barbara said was true, that is really, really sad. Who is more pathetic, Lu or Ramona? Lu would rather be married to a man who makes very little effort to hide his extracurricular activities than be alone? Her friends know and pity her. Argh. 

Its kind of a toss up but I am going with Lu.  A nice apt and terrace are not worth my pride.  UNLESS they both have an arrangement to see others and they don't want it spoken of on camera which is their right if that's the case I am going with Ramona.  But to play this as a later in life love story?  Nah.  Ramona is just a mess and its sad seeing a 60 year old woman playing the ingenue.  Arrested development.  

Tinsely's hair has got to go.  It looks very dated.  If its going to be long maybe stop with the bo peep curls.  

I do not find Bethenny's dude cute but maybe he is a nice guy.  I am sure the ex wife or kids didn't want to hear about how he pined for B during his marriage.  Some things just don't need to be said for the sake of others.  It was nice she apologized to Tom.  

I did think it was great seeing B and C hustling for the charity.  

[ryebread]

4 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

Its kind of a toss up but I am going with Lu.  A nice apt and terrace are not worth my pride.

I'm going with Lu, too.  

I would imagine the thought of Tom cheating isn't far from her memory.  I mean, she saw it with her own two eyes. If she's not okay with that and, let's say, he travels for work and she has doubts, it's a hellish way to live.  BTDT. 

But being Ramona would be no picnic, either.  Although, perhaps she really has no self-awareness and her ignorance is bliss. 

[Yours Truly]

1 hour ago, motorcitymom65 said:

But what more proof do we need than what we saw last season? Lu seemed to think they were exclusive. He put a ring on it. Then he cheated on her. Why is it so hard to believe this dude tends to give women the impression that they are exclusive when he is still getting some on the side? We saw it with Lu, then the gal with Ramona said the same thing on camera. That she thought they were exclusive and then she saw him with Lu. I don't believe everything I hear or see, but think that where there is smoke there is usually fire. 

On the second bolded point, again, where is there any proof of this? Any proof that she isn't bothered by it? She sure seemed bothered last season when she ran from the room when Beth showed her the pictures and Lu said she was going to throw up. Bothered when she screamed at him on the phone. Bothered and insulted when Beth asked her if they were going to have an open marriage.  Bothered in the press she did later where she said she was hurt, shocked, and went into a bit of depression over the cheating.Bothered this season in the first episode when she said if he ever cheated again she would lob his balls off. I think that is the thing about all of this - many are discussing two different things. Some don't understand why the ladies don't leave it alone because Lu seems fine with it so they just need to let it go. Others see a woman who has declared vehemently that she is not OK with it and would be devastated if it happened again.

So wha to believe? What Lu tells us, or what we believe based on her previous behavior? This is the problem with being a big fat liar and a pretender. Folks just don't know what to believe, and even folks that like her, seem to not believe her when she says she would never tolerate such behavior. 

What did we see? One indiscretion. And we didn't actually see it.

My curiosity lies in this "pattern" that has been created. I don't see proof of a pattern. I see a serial dater. I see women having expectations to know more about someone they are dating than they probably are entitled to know.

Aside from Tom's mistake last season what we do know is that Tom and Lu were a part of the UES dating scene. We've also seen 2 women exaggerate their connection to Tom with inconsistent declarations.

Me being a women myself I'm also inclined to believe that some of these other accounts just may well be along those same lines. Cause women get caught up in the moment. All we have now are rumors that  I'm sure have surfaced because of the reality show. Or have taken on more "credulence" all  of a sudden because of the show. I'm just saying, aside from his mistake last season what else is there that says he DEFINITELY strings woman along, wanting to claim relationships while still maintaining side chicks?

Seems to me he just has a bunch of chicks he's dating and hooking up with strewn about the UES and no main chick.  That is, before Lu. I'm sure it was gonna be just one more notch for both of the them cause Lu was running the same game but for some reason these two stuck for their own reasons. Doesn't seem like such a big mystery actually.

Now how he transitions into "monogamy" that's a whole other story but I'm not buying the whole women were having the wool pulled over their eyes while he was "sneaking" around town with other women. I see it as he was just dating a bunch of women and some swore they were the ish but came to find out they weren't.

For me the answer lies within what makes these women THINK they were exclusive. What was said, what was done. As a women I know how quick women like to jump to this conclusion and a lot of the time it is waaaaaaaaayyy pre-mature. I just have this inkling that there are just some exaggerations going on when it comes to just how involved he was with some of these women.

Now I'm not saying it's not possible. If it comes out that a part of his dating regiment was that he regularly promised that he would be exclusive with them during their courting period then the cat's out of the bag. Women "thinking" it was exclusive assigning a more committed sentiment to his behavior without him actually cosigning a monogamous relationship isn't a smoking gun. What it is is a big mistake many women make. 

Some men aren't exclusive until that shit is specifically spelled out for them and they know it's a deal breaker. Some men will continue with the arrangement for as long as they can without an official commitment. Doesn't mean they just become your boyfriend by default. Sad to say a lot of men are like this. And as for someone like Tom??? I find it hard to believe that women didn't spot this detail about him from a mile away.  Nope, nu-uh. Sorry.

Edited May 18, 2017 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

48 minutes ago, Lemons said:

Whose giving Tom credit?  All he did was date the numerous amount of single women of a certain age available in the upper east side. He doesn't get any credit. 

These women aren't victims. They are desperate to have a man. The problem is they are practically inbred in the upper east side. They don't appear to mingle outside of their area code. Bethany is right when she makes fun of these crusty upper east side women who lunch. They live in the least diverse neighborhood in NYC. If they left the upper east side they might realize that there are a lot of decent men out there. A whole lot better than Tom. And Harry!  How is he considered a catch?

When I said credit I meant he's being described as some stealth womanizer.

Please, he's a baldy with a wallet that managed to get some action from a variety of women.

Edited May 18, 2017 by Yours Truly

[BBHN]

Quote

he's being described as some stealth womanizer.

Nothing stealth about his womanizing...not anymore, anyway.

[Ms Blue Jay]

9 hours ago, ghoulina said:

I thought this was a fun episode. Not too much fighting, lots of stuff to snark on. 

For all the complaining about this episode -- (Women over 35 flirting?!  GAASSSSSSSPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP)  this is the only episode this season I actually enjoyed. I guess I like parties, real estate (I LOVE real estate), fun dates, fun drinking, flirting, schmoozing, and Dorinda looking beautiful in sequins.  Dorinda takes what I would THINK that I would find tacky and makes it look amazing.  

[lezlers]

48 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

Bowling for Cougar- bine. LMAO!!! WWC

I saw that notification pop up on my phone and died.

[KungFuBunny]

52 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

Bowling for Cougar- bine. LMAO!!! WWC

https://soundcloud.com/watch-what-crappens

[Trooper York]

15 minutes ago, Yours Truly said:

These women aren't victims. They are desperate to have a man. The problem is they are practically inbred in the upper east side. They don't appear to mingle outside of their area code. Bethany is right when she makes fun of these crusty upper east side women who lunch. They live in the least diverse neighborhood in NYC. If they left the upper east side they might realize that there are a lot of decent men out there. A whole lot better than Tom. And Harry!  How is he considered a catch?

That's the thing. If they go outside the area code for a bridge and tunnel guy like John you get nothing but judgment, snark and scorn. Bethenny, Carole and Romona had nothing but bad things to say about him and that Dorinda could do a lot better than a successful businessman who loved her. They want to pick out something from Brooks Brothers Bald Douchebag collection like Luann and Bethenny.  Even simple and supportive guys like Heathers husband are called weaklings and fools by the likes of Ramona and the ladies that lunch. If you are not getting one of the catch and release types from their pond you are not fishing for the right thing.

I think it is right on the money that there are a lot of women who thought their relationship with Tom was something other than what it is. I know a couple of guys like Tom. They go from woman to woman and don't tell one about the other because they are not engaged or even in an exclusive relationship. There are just too many desperate women out there especially when they are over fifty. Some of them build a castle in the sky and are crushed that their relationship is not what they think it is. So now they all come out of the woodwork with their knives out for Tom and Luann. Sonja and Ramona foremost among them. They need to let this go and let them get on with their marriage and their lives. I am glad that Luann did not invite any of them to the wedding except for Dorinda and John. 

Luann has the right attitude. Just come out and say that you are not going to invite people who don't want them to suceed. The worst thing for Bethenny, Ramona and Sonja would be for Tom and Luann to live happily ever after. Because then they might have to look in the mirror and realize that they are the problem. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

3 hours ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

So, what's weird for me is that it doesn't bother me one bit that France's newly elected President is married to a woman 25 years his senior.  I actually like him more because of it.  Not speaking for anyone else here.   It's not the idea of age gaps that I find gross (and I haven't actually expressed as much wrt Tinsely and Chad) and it also isn't gender specific to me, I don't care who's older.   My thing is how chronologically and experientially close the May in the May December is to childhood.   Chronologically Adam and Chad are only 5 years apart, but I don't think of Adam as a kid.  He's a dude with not just a job, but a career.  At 28, he has had potentially at least one long term relationship under his belt so to speak.  That's a fully grown man.   Chad isn't old enough to have had a long term anything, nevermind girlfriend.  Technically?  Sure, but we'd have to go back to high school for it to count.  

The bartender at Bowlmor wouldn'tve carded Adam.  If you're with a man or woman that must prove they're of legal drinking age because they look like they could actually be younger, that is my threshold.    That and the inequitable dynamic of sexually dominant versus inexperienced one couple is against the other being pretty much in the same place physically.    Their ages don't bother me, everyone's grown.   They're in different places.

OMG, Adam is only 28?  LOL.  My YOUNGER brother is 30....... I need my smelling salts.  I don't care about the age differences in both couples whatsoever, but the fact that Adam is ONLY 28?  Yeesh.  I didn't realize that.  That's so young.  (Not in an INAPPROPRIATE way, just wow , he is a  younger man than I previously realized.  That's all.)

[Natalie68]

5 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I guess Lu's friend Barbara did not realize her mic was live, I cannot imagine how she could explain any of what she said on camera about how Lu should call off the wedding.  Tom really was a gentleman about meeting Bethenny.

Sonja is boring this season as is Ramona which makes me think Ramona's  horrible comments to Bethenny were weak attempts to keep her interesting and controversial and/or maybe the producers were prodding her along to stir things up.  I loved Ramona's daughter telling her the problem she has with other people seems to always be because of her own doing.

Had anyone else noticed that the pitcher of water that Sonya had the leaf in, that water was brown. Combine the brown water with the no hot water situation should motivate Tinsley to find her own place ASAP. 

Sonya has no place telling Tinsley not to go after the youngen's, geeze, pot calling the kettle black or what?!

How in the world were we spared any camera time with John? How lucky are we!  Dorinda's event looked nice, I loved her telling the bartenders not to serve anymore booze till people start to bid, too funny. In reality booze is responsible for most of the silent auction items I have ever gotten.

Yes!  I was hoping it was from dirt on the plant but I am not sure.  It jives with the sketchy ice.