S13.E18: Be Still, My Soul

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Quote

When Maggie’s mom’s health deteriorates, the doctors are at odds over how to treat her. Meanwhile, Richard comes to grips with Bailey’s betrayal over the residency program. Directed by Ellen Pompeo.

Promo:

[chitowngirl]

Jeez, does anyone's parent make it through at Seattle Grey Mercy Death??

But a well done episode. I exactly how it feels to be a raw as Maggie and she portrayed it perfectly.

Edited March 31, 2017 by chitowngirl

[BaseOps]

I thought this was a really solid episode with great performances all around. Ellen did a fantastic job directing; the script was a bit jumpy, but it still flowed well. It was nice and quiet and did a good job of utilizing the right characters. I like how much they involved Webber - it was interesting to see him watch his 'daughter' dealing with this whole other life she had. I don't always love Maggie, but I liked getting a more intimate look at her family and how she was raised. 

The callbacks to Ellis were a nice touch. 

9 minutes ago, chitowngirl said:

Jeez, does anyone's parent make it through at Seattle Grey Mercy Death??

Most parents die in real life, too.

Edited March 31, 2017 by BaseOps

[rlc]

There isn't a single thing I like about the Maggie character.

[SnoGirl]

I really liked this episode too. I kinda felt like it was "old school Grey's." Wish Alex had been in it more, isnt he back at the house? I know they were trying to show Maggie's sisters, but I always thought her and Alex were close too.

I haven't always loved Riggs, but his "What do you need" caught me by surprise and I smiled. It was just such a normal, couple reaction. I know they're not a couple, but it was sweet.

Why wasn't Maggie's father there sooner? I know they divorced, but they had been married for years, you think he would have been there for the end.

[choclatechip45]

That was a great episode. I called my mom after to tell her I love her. I thought Kelly McCreary did a great job.

[clarkbar]

Hit close to home.  Meredith's advice about Maggie talking to her mom was spot on.  Memorize the sound of her voice.  Terrific acting.  That's all--I need to get another tissue.

[Madding crowd]

Maggie's mom should have been seeing an oncologist. Bailey, Meredith and Jackson should have been working with the oncologist, not on their own.

[LexieLily]

I have to ask - where were Meredith's kids when they had the big family dinner at Casa Meredith and when Meredith, Maggie and Amelia were round-the-clock at the hospital?

[Karen885]

14 minutes ago, Madding crowd said:

Maggie's mom should have been seeing an oncologist. Bailey, Meredith and Jackson should have been working with the oncologist, not on their own.

I was just coming here to say the same thing. Jackson is a plastic surgeon, Meridith and Bailey are both general surgeons. Where is the oncologist? Where is the radiologist? 

[Laurie4H]

Good episode but so predictable how Meredith can't date Riggs because Maggie needs her.   Just another relationship contrivance.

[chitowngirl]

I do like these one story episodes. 

But...in all the time that passed during this episode, we can assume that Owen and Amy still haven't talked to each other.

[DearEvette]

Great episode.  For once Maggie's neurotic personality was used effectively.  She is a surgeon and an over achiever of course she thinks she can just fix it.  Great performances all around by everyone.  I especially loved the last scene between Maggie and her mom.  Excellent advice, Maggie doing her nails and ordering her lashes because her mom wants to die with good eye lashes. 

Also liked the dinner scene, Richard and Mer giving each other the guilty eyes about Ellis' ashes.  Also Maggie mom wanting to pay her respects to Ellis kinda reminded me of William/Jack on This Is Us, somewhat similar situation.

One of the best eps of the season.

Edited March 31, 2017 by DearEvette

[readster]

Was a very good episode, but with the dad showing up at the end. I felt that was a little too late and after Maggie's mom talked about how not to let anyone make her feel small. I knew that was right back up with how she talked about how she felt oppressed by her ex-husband for 10 years. Once again, WHAT THE HELL WAS HE DOING that made her feel like that. I'm hoping we get an answer since it's right after the funeral next week. That is one of the few times I want to know what the damn backstory is that lead to her mom cheating for 4 years and talking about she stayed for Maggie. Especially when her mom was talking about how Maggie was being too good for her own good over the years.

[pennben]

13 minutes ago, DearEvette said:

Also liked the dinner scene, Richard and Mer giving each other the guilty eyes about Ellis' ashes.

"We dumped her down the scrub sink outside OR 2"/"By the water"---I had to rewind that a couple of times because it was so good.  Hee!

Nice moment with Bailey/Webber at the end.  Hopefully we'll begin to now get good payoffs for the relentless (sometimes ridiculous) setups thus far this season.

Edited March 31, 2017 by pennben

[StaceyNotStacie]

This was a pretty good episode. I was sad to see Maggie's mom go; she was an enjoyable character.  I liked that it was just the one story, but with the majority of the characters. I wish they would have shown more of Maggie's father. I did like the awkwardness and simpleness of the meeting between Richard and Mr Pierce. 

[hendersonrocks]

It's hard to even be objective about this one - my dad was in a clinical trial for stage four cancer last year. It's awful and unspeakable but it worked, and for that I am forever grateful.

Just like Bailey said, I guess. I'm too close.

[backformore]

1 hour ago, LexieLily said:

I have to ask - where were Meredith's kids when they had the big family dinner at Casa Meredith and when Meredith, Maggie and Amelia were round-the-clock at the hospital?

Tv kids need a LOT of sleep!  Much more than the regular kind of kid.

[clarkbar]

13 minutes ago, hendersonrocks said:

It's hard to even be objective about this one - my dad was in a clinical trial for stage four cancer last year. It's awful and unspeakable but it worked, and for that I am forever grateful.

Just like Bailey said, I guess. I'm too close.

Bless you.  This is tough stuff.

[StaceyNotStacie]

1 hour ago, LexieLily said:

I have to ask - where were Meredith's kids when they had the big family dinner at Casa Meredith and when Meredith, Maggie and Amelia were round-the-clock at the hospital?

I'm sure there was a kiddie table; it was probably invisible, just like Meredith's kids.

[Scatterbrained]

Maybe Uncle Alex took the kids out for happy meals, or something.

[tomorrowgirl]

I have never been a fan of Maggie, but this episode was well written, acted and directed.

[funnygirl]

2 hours ago, RogerDodger said:

Was this something they ever showed on screen?  Or even talked about before?

Seems like it would be something I would remember, but I have no recollection of it at all.

Season 4, episode 5 "Haunt You Every Day"

In my opinion, I thought that moment with Meredith and Richard holding Ellis' ashes and washing them down the scrub room drain was actually very fitting and touching. So I didn't like how they laughed at it in tonight's episode. I mean I realize to an outsider like Diane it would seem odd, but the overall reaction from Meredith and company kind of unnecessarily craps on that moment all of those years ago simply to get a cheap laugh in this episode.  

Edited March 31, 2017 by funnygirl

[Crazy Bird Lady]

It's nice to see Mer embrace Maggie as her sister, making her high priority at this sad time. It's a touch of the old Mer, before Derek died, and it's refreshing.

Edited April 1, 2017 by Crazy Bird Lady

[upperco]

Histrionic, but mostly earned and quite affecting. Good work. 

[Karen885]

I had to laugh at Maggie's mom talking about orgasms right before she died. No wonder Maggie talks about sex all the time. 

[moonorchid]

Jackson and arizonas presence kept taking me out and making me roll my eyes.

how is Maggie enticing this much concern and care from these people when this same group couldn't decide on a freaking gesture for japril when their baby died. Give me a freaking break!

other then that, considering there hasn't been enough time to really get attached to Maggie's mom I was engaged at the end. I can't imagine going through something like that.

[pennben]

1 hour ago, funnygirl said:

In my opinion, I thought that moment with Meredith and Richard holding Ellis' ashes and washing them down the scrub room drain was actually very fitting and touching. So I didn't like how they laughed at it in tonight's episode. I mean I realize to an outsider like Diane it would seem odd, but the overall reaction from Meredith and company kind of unnecessarily craps on that moment all of those years ago simply to get a cheap laugh in this episode.

See, I liked it because even though it was absolutely appropriate for Ellis, it can be seen as absolutely crazy and disrespectful even to other doctors.  And then, to tell that story to a dinner table full of guests who don't know the backstory, especially Diane who is not a doctor, makes it even better.  Top it off with Meredith being Meredith and just bluntly telling what happened, while Richard is trying to formulate an 'acceptable' response and comes up with a great non-lie lie at the same moment, well that was just as appropriate to me for those two as was dumping her ashes in a scrub sink!  

My opinion is probably somewhat biased as my family still laughs about moments at my father's wake/funeral from decades ago, it's a release valve when you think of some things that happened during that time. 

Edited March 31, 2017 by pennben

[flickers]

1 hour ago, moonorchid said:

Jackson and arizonas presence kept taking me out and making me roll my eyes.

how is Maggie enticing this much concern and care from these people when this same group couldn't decide on a freaking gesture for japril when their baby died. Give me a freaking break!

other then that, considering there hasn't been enough time to really get attached to Maggie's mom I was engaged at the end. I can't imagine going through something like that.

They keep some of the characters so isolated that it does feel forced when they start to show concern for each other. Maggie, Jackson and Arizona make an odd trio. Maybe Diane was foreshadowing when she assumed Jackson was Maggie's crush upon meeting him, I wouldn't be surprised if something happens there.

[Dee]

Richard and Meredith laughing about Ellis ashes reminded me of Meredith, Alex, Cristina and Izzy laughing at George's funeral. 

[Guest]

2 hours ago, funnygirl said:

Season 4, episode 5 "Haunt You Every Day"

In my opinion, I thought that moment with Meredith and Richard holding Ellis' ashes and washing them down the scrub room drain was actually very fitting and touching. So I didn't like how they laughed at it in tonight's episode. I mean I realize to an outsider like Diane it would seem odd, but the overall reaction from Meredith and company kind of unnecessarily craps on that moment all of those years ago simply to get a cheap laugh in this episode.  

It bugged me tonight because it was a beautiful tribute to Ellis. The initial scene was fine, because explaining it to someone who didn't know Ellis would be hard. But when it became something for Maggie to throw in Mer's face, I didn't like it.

[moonorchid]

41 minutes ago, flickers said:

They keep some of the characters so isolated that it does feel forced when they start to show concern for each other. Maggie, Jackson and Arizona make an odd trio. Maybe Diane was foreshadowing when she assumed Jackson was Maggie's crush upon meeting him, I wouldn't be surprised if something happens there.

They better not go there with Maggie and Jackson. 

[pennben]

19 minutes ago, deaja said:

It bugged me tonight because it was a beautiful tribute to Ellis. The initial scene was fine, because explaining it to someone who didn't know Ellis would be hard. But when it became something for Maggie to throw in Mer's face, I didn't like it.

I felt like that was showing us that Maggie was still in denial and angry/scared/and everything else so she twisted a moment that was anything but to lash out at Meredith to justify her rage/emotions at her mother dying. I think we were supposed to know Maggie was wrong in what she said because we saw what really happened, Maggie didn't. 

Edited March 31, 2017 by pennben

[Chas411]

Quote

how is Maggie enticing this much concern and care from these people when this same group couldn't decide on a freaking gesture for japril when their baby died. Give me a freaking break!

Because she's Maggie and everyone loves her/thinks she's awesome/wacky etc. Remember when she first got introduced had a standalone episode and at least one character (usually Alex) had to say how awesome she was in each episode. Whereas most of the characters find April annoying. It's not right but Greys have always had favourites and Maggie is a prime example.

[flickers]

It kept taking me out of the story that everyone was so concerned for Maggie. Like the gun episode last season, where everyone suddenly cared about that one child victim. I kept wondering where the real Meredith Grey had gone.

Roomfuls of people slowly bursting into laughter make me shudder.

Edited March 31, 2017 by flickers

[readster]

10 hours ago, clarkbar said:

Bless you.  This is tough stuff.

My wife's uncle went through the same situation. He was starting a trial and was about to get the full treatment, but sadly much like Maggie's mom. The uncle's son was having a talk with his dad in the hospital. Got up to get something and when he turned back to sit, he was gone. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

I wish they would tell girls in high school sex ed classes what Diane told Maggie: orgasms aren't a gift - they're your right. Never be with a guy who doesn't make your orgasms a priority.

I thought Meredith and Richard dumping Ellis' ashes in the OR sink was appropriate for her (and for them). As far as I'm concerned, whatever the immediate family deems appropriate is what should be done and fuck anyone else's opinion. But I get why they were reluctant to tell other people what they did because it could sound weird or callous to people who didn't know Ellis. They should have just said that they scattered her ashes and left it at that!

I'm not a Meredith/Riggs shipper but when he heard what Maggie said and then asked Meredith, "What do you need?" I thought finally, someone who knows how to have a compassionate but appropriate response to someone in a crisis!

9 hours ago, Scatterbrained said:

Maybe Uncle Alex took the kids out for happy meals, or something.

Uncle Alex was at the lasagna dinner so unless he took them for happy meals and then put them to bed, we still have no idea where the three kids were (as usual).

[Earmuffs Mom]

Overall, I thought it was a very well-done episode, reminiscent of earlier Grey's.  However, one thing that kept taking me out of it was Maggie's dad not being there until after her mom died.  They were married over 30 years, just recently got divorced, and even if the divorce was bad, he couldn't come support his daughter and/or pay respects to the woman he raised a child with?  I guess I am colored by my own experience.  My parents were together from the time they were teenagers, but got divorced when I was 18.  When my dad was dying of cancer 16 years later, my mom still came to support me and say goodbye to him.  She told me that even though they had no love lost, they had a long history, he was my dad, and she was sad for those things.  He really appreciated her making that effort to say goodbye and it helped me so much to have that support.  

Back to the show...Did anyone miss Stephanie, Jo, Leah, April, DeLuca, Ben, Eliza, or Owen?  Were you bothered by a practically mute Alex, Arizona, and Amelia?  This cast is so bloated that eleven regular cast members could be practically deleted for this storyline, leaving plenty behind to make the episode interesting. 

[Biggie B]

Oh my gosh, what an awful episode. I disliked just about all of it. I will say that I basically liked Dianne as a person - she seemed really nice - but I definitely disagreed with her not having told Maggie about her cancer from the get-go. All that crap about not wanting to bring any darkness into Maggie's life - I actually laughed out loud at that. Look at the havoc that was created for Maggie by not knowing about this horrible illness until really, it was too late. I just find the notion of keeping such a severe situation a complete and total secret from someone you love more than anything else on earth absolutely bizarre! What a complete betrayal. Clearly Maggie and Dianne had an excellent relationship and adored each other. My mother and I had a fraught and dysfunctional relationship, but the VERY FIRST PERSON I called upon receiving my breast cancer diagnosis was my mother, and that was within moments of hanging up the phone with my doctor!

The whole episode just did absolutely nothing for me. Nothing. I felt no emotion, nothing but annoyance. Where were her oncologist and radiologist? Why would ANY of the cast members even be REMOTELY involved in Diane's care?

Maggie's parents lived in Boston, yes? If so - and I'm NOT a stickler for details, so for all I know, that's incorrect - did Maggie's dad fly in from Boston (and yes, I know they were recently divorced), and if also so, then how long were Maggie, et al., hanging out in Dianne's room after she died? It was daytime when she died and the dad arrived at night, I think. So did they just leave Dianne's body lying there for hours and hours? The logistics of the dad's transportation bugged me, but again, I have no idea where he was coming from.

I just don't care enough (or at all) about Maggie to feel bad for her. I did feel bad for Dianne. She was a relatively young and vibrant person with what should have been years of good living left. I've lost a couple of wonderful people to metastic breast cancer, it is horrific. I'm glad Dianne ultimately went peacefully and that she was able to impart to Maggie the things she felt were important. But I truly don't care that Maggie is sad or devastated. She is not the first person to go through this, nor will she be the last. It is, sadly, part of our life, that we lose our parents. There's no preparation, no script to follow, no protocol - you basically wing it. But it's a reality. It happens. And it can be devastating. But seeing it happen to Maggie evoked nothing from me at all, no sympathy or empathy.

Edited to add: I also hated the #TearsforGrey hashtag that was in the lower left corner of the screen throughout the episode. Jeez. Subtle as a trainwreck.

 

Edited March 31, 2017 by Biggie B

[proserpina65]

Okay, well that was a good episode.  Maggie did act like a twelve year old, but having been in the position of watching my father die from cancer, I can at least relate to her a bit.  Didn't pack the gut punch of George's dad dying, though; those episodes make me bawl like a baby every time, partly because Mr. O'Malley had the same cancer my dad did.

12 hours ago, choclatechip45 said:

That was a great episode. I called my mom after to tell her I love her. I thought Kelly McCreary did a great job.

I called my mom, too.

[Ohwell]

It was sad that Maggie's mom died at such a relatively young age but Maggie leaves me cold.  I will never forget that she slapped that woman (I think it was last season?) and didn't face any punishment for it.  

[mojito]

First good episode I've seen in a while, though Grey's usually has its moments.

I liked Diane's comment when Maggie was oblivious to the nurse's son who had already failed his driver license exam twice: "Maggie, you work with these people. How do you not know this?"

Whenever anyone EVER coughs into a white cloth, there will be blood. It's probably in the fine print of the Constitution.

Who didn't know that Diane was going to die while Maggie opened that (hospital) window?

I'm one who generally doesn't notice music. But in the last 5 episodes, I've found the music to be intrusive.

I've decided that my favorite couple is Richard and Arizona. 

[Deanie87]

22 minutes ago, proserpina65 said:

Didn't pack the gut punch of George's dad dying, though; those episodes make me bawl like a baby every time, partly because Mr. O'Malley had the same cancer my dad did.

13 hours ago, choclatechip45 said:

Ugh, I will never not tear up when Cristina tells George's dad that he is the best intern.  Never.  

Quote

Back to the show...Did anyone miss Stephanie, Jo, Leah, April, DeLuca, Ben, Eliza, or Owen?  Were you bothered by a practically mute Alex, Arizona, and Amelia? This cast is so bloated that eleven regular cast members could be practically deleted for this storyline, leaving plenty behind to make the episode interesting. 

I did.  Not in and of themselves, but because nearly all of those characters listed (with the exception of Ben, Steph and Leah) have had storylines started and then stalled.  As good as the acting was in this episode and as much as it was moving on its own, I just can't enjoy these stand alone/centric episodes as much as I might, because they halt the progression of storylines that were started LAST season.  The pacing of this show is just excruciating.  Its like they have too many episodes and not enough at the same time. 

[FnkyChkn34]

1 hour ago, Earmuffs Mom said:

Back to the show...Did anyone miss Stephanie, Jo, Leah, April, DeLuca, Ben, Eliza, or Owen?  Were you bothered by a practically mute Alex, Arizona, and Amelia?  This cast is so bloated that eleven regular cast members could be practically deleted for this storyline, leaving plenty behind to make the episode interesting. 

Nope.  I only missed April a little bit, because I thought she and Jackson might get back together?  And I like Owen, but he wasn't needed in this episode.  I do wish Alex had a bigger role lately, but Amelia was in the episode as Maggie's pseudo-sister for support so I can't say I missed her; she was there.  I was very happy to not see any Arizona and Eliza drama.  They can go at anytime. 

[Shellie]

1 hour ago, Biggie B said:

Oh my gosh, what an awful episode. I disliked just about all of it.

 

I totally agree.  Looks like we are in the minority.  This is the first time I've ever turned off a Grey's episode before it ended. 

For me, this show has become one episode of unrelenting misery after another.  There is no pacing.  There is no brightness, optimism, cheerfulness, hope, happiness or humor.  This is especially jarring because I'm rewatching Season 2, which conveys all of those things.  

[DearEvette]

2 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I'm not a Meredith/Riggs shipper but when he heard what Maggie said and then asked Meredith, "What do you need?" I thought finally, someone who knows how to have a compassionate but appropriate response to someone in a crisis!

I really liked that too.  It felt real.  I also liked the awkward hug with Maggie and her relaxing and saying "thank you."  Made me realize that everyone (Maggie especially) was so focused on just doing, doing, doing, the small moment of comfort was nice.

I will say that Nathan needs facial hair though.  I didn't realize it last episode (or maybe it was the episode before last) when he was really trying to get Meredith to admit to something, but I kept puzzling about what was different about him and then I realized he didn't have his little scruff.  He needs that scruff.  it totally cranks up his hotness meter.

[runninggal]

14 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

Maggie's mom should have been seeing an oncologist. Bailey, Meredith and Jackson should have been working with the oncologist, not on their own.

That's what I was thinking the whole time.  Why was her case not managed by an oncologist?  I know there has to be a lot of suspension of disbelief but I could not get over that she wasn't being seen by an oncologist.  

[Primetimer]

Maggie runs an emotional gamut as her mother faces her last battle with cancer.

View the full article

[Scatterbrained]

3 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

Uncle Alex was at the lasagna dinner so unless he took them for happy meals and then put them to bed, we still have no idea where the three kids were (as usual).

Oops!  My mistake!  Maybe she snuck them out the back to Uncle Owen who takes them out  a lot so he can get his kid fix.  Or maybe, she called Nathan later and said, "I know what you can do to help, take the kids out to dinner for a while."  Or maybe it's the invisible "Grey's nanny".  

[StaceyNotStacie]

I'm surprised by who was at the dinner. I wasn't surprised to see Richard or Jackson, but was surprised by Arizona (unless Alex called her or she happened to be at a trivia night with Richard). I was surprised that Bailey wasn't there and that there wasn't an April mention (a quick comment that she was home with the baby). 

I liked the scenes with Mama Pierce and Meredith at home. I'm a bit disappointed that we didn't see her dispensing motherly advice to Alex or Amelia.  That scene where Mrs Pierce was mentioning teaching Maggie how to make lasagna was sad knowing that the end was near, and then the girls sitting around the lasagna at the end with Maggie knowing that it was the last lasagna that her mother ever made.  

Did I blink and not see her, or has April not been on since the Montana episode?