S08.E01: It's Worse Than We Thought

[Angeltoes]

Quote

Kody comes across as such a loud, arrogant jerk. Why would anybody want him for a father-in-law? 

Why would anybody want him for a husband, is the question that I ponder.

Quote

Either Maddie has absolutely no connection with Truely, or they re-filmed the scene.  They seemed like acquaintances more than sisters. 

My sister is 11 years older than me.  She was never affectionate towards me and so there has never been a buddy aspect to our relationship...sisters not friends.  However, she has mellowed a great deal now that she's 60+.  In fact, at my mother-in-law's funeral, my sister came barreling towards me with a sympathetic face and her arms outstretched for a hug.  I actually looked behind me to see who she was gunning for and was shocked when it turned out to be me. First sister hug ever.

Tony gently pings my gaydar.  Plus he seems dull.

[gonecrackers]

When Meri & Kody were talking, I sensed an odd, condescending tone from Kody, almost like he was trying to calm a person in hysteria. I thought he also has a convenient memory; just what maybe he's comfortable remembering. He has a way of presenting himself as being open minded, but I don't feel this is really the case with him, unless it serves him personally. I haven't watched this show much, but when I do I see markers of someone manipulative & emotionally abusive.

Edited November 29, 2016 by gonecrackers

[tobeannounced]

18 hours ago, 3girlsforus said:

I'm curious about this. Do we have outside confirmation that this is the case? After all, these are people who still are trying to convince us that they "escaped" from Utah when they moved to Vegas. It would be awful to have a church you want to be a part of turn you away for your parents beliefs and lifestyle. Certainly that could have happened here. But I'm wondering if it was more subtle than that. I can see them being turned down for membership if they refuse to say that they don't believe in polygamy as part of the religion. That is a huge deal now for the LDS as they try to distance themselves from the polygamist history of their sect. I would be different if they were told they couldn't join if they still associate with their parents, that would be awful. But I can see denouncing polygamy as it relates to the religion being necessary to join the church. After all, why would you want to be part of a religion where you don't believe in a major portion of the church. I see the view on polygamy in LDS being a much bigger deal than wanting to join and still wanting to drink caffeine. It would be like someone wanting to join a Catholic church but saying they aren't really sure about Jesus. 

Certainly they could have been turned away because they are Browns. It would be horrible and I hope that didn't happen to them. But I'm wondering if our only source for this info is the Browns themselves. They aren't really reliable when it comes to fairly evaluating their "discrimination'. 

Yeah, I'm kind of giving the side eye to their explanation as well.  I mean, it could be as they say, but I'm wondering if they were told they would have to cease appearing on a national television show that promotes a polygamist lifestyle if they wanted to join the church and they were like, Not so much.

Edited November 30, 2016 by tobeannounced

[Cherrio]

28 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

LOL, I try to be. Do mainstream Mormons believe in celestial planets too? Or is it just FLDS? 

I tried to attach a video and could not, so go to youtube and watch and listen to "I Believe" from the Book of Mormon.     It will explain a lot of it.      

[gonecrackers]

Others were commenting on this as well, but I was also wondering why Robyn wasn't present much for this episode. Was it filmed very shortly after her last birth, as she's still got her belly. (maybe not, it can get tougher to recover sometimes or take longer; just wondering) It might be just me but when she was present she seemed a bit stressed & unhappy. Maybe she's just busy with the kids &/or nursing a lot so couldn't be there? And has the baby been shown at all? In past she was always holding the new baby, baby carrier, nursing, etc. This latest baby was completely MIA even when Robyn was shown so I thought that was odd.

[giaNtsandYankees]

On 11/27/2016 at 11:55 PM, Twopper said:

I think I really dislike Kody more than I dislike Meri.  I am sure being the legal wife meant a lot to Meri and it must have irritated her to be reminded it mattered not to him.  Not too sure Robin cared for the remark that his legal marriage to her matters only for adoption purposes.

I'm agree that it probably did not matter much to Kody. For example, when he was talking about the preparations for Madison's wedding, he said something like, "This is the first monogamous wedding we're having." Or something like that.

Then Meri says, "It was not the first." And then reminded Kody that THEIR own wedding  was the first. 

Shows how important it was to that f**kwhistle.

[Wings]

Robin may be going through post partem depression, it is not uncommon.

Kody, just pay for your daughters weddings like most parents of the bride do.  Brides choice on the details after budget and date is set.  Stop with having to know them, you don't.  Not your business even if you are paying.

Most parents  don't know their kids spouses well until after the marriage.  Controlling doesn't even touch it.  Special snowflakes these two.  Jesus 

[SongbirdHollow]

4 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

 

I'm concerned they'll end up stuck someday, but I guess 'divorce is not an option' Kody isn't concerned... even though 2 of his wives are divorced. Go figure.

Janelle, Robyn and Meri are all divorcees!

[camom]

I was secretly hoping Mykelti would say that she and Tony want to get married quickly because she is pregnant.  Just to see Kody and Christine's heads explode.

[crgirl412]

3 hours ago, VedaPierce said:

All of them fighting/getting thrown out of a dept store in Ireland. Then fighting on the bus back to the hotel. She said it in a talking head and I thought it was HI. LA. RIOUS. 

Thanks!!  I didn't see her say that. 

Someone should get Vicki and Meri in touch and so Vicki could give her advice on how to get her love tank full since they both said the same thing at different times:

Vicki to Donn - My love tank is empty. 

Meri to Kody- I'm sick of just doing life by myself.   

[SongbirdHollow]

29 minutes ago, giaNtsandYankees said:

 

Then Meri says, "It was not the first." And then reminded Kody that THEIR own wedding  was the first. 

 

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

[DakotaJustice]

21 minutes ago, SongbirdHollow said:

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

But those happened on different PLANETS.  :D

[MrSmith]

2 hours ago, Normades said:

A parent can be right there in the same house with a child and still be neglectful and cause the child to feel abandonment.  Take it from someone who knows.  I imagine many of those kids feel neglect and abandonment.

This is so true. We had foster children while I was growing up and it was very clear to me that my mother liked the foster children and my younger brother better than me (in that order). Now I'm 44 and she's 75 and she's all upset because we don't have a close relationship and I only call her every 4 to 6 weeks. Unfortunately, there's no way to explain it all to her in a way that she'd be able to understand.

[riverblue22]

That stuff that Mykelti spouts about how Tony completes her and she is calm around him, etc.--they say all that crap on Four Weddings and Say Yes To The Dress.  Those sentiments are probably everywhere on Pinterest and plastered on little wooden boards at Hobby Lobby.

[gonecrackers]

58 minutes ago, SongbirdHollow said:

Janelle, Robyn and Meri are all divorcees!

Right, HA! How could I possibly forget Meri?!  I guess divorce is only okay when it suits his needs... typical Kody.

[gonecrackers]

52 minutes ago, SongbirdHollow said:

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

Janelle's was particularly odd - I've not followed these people; what was up with that?? I thought Robyn was in an abusive relationship? Maybe that's just an impression I got. She's not doing any better now.

Postpartum depression - if married to Kody depression in general would be understandable.

[LucyEth]

So Meri is tired of doing life by herself.  So polygamy isn't all that great is it as all the wives seem to be unhappy.  I think Kody does not know how to manage the 4 of them fairly.  Robin gets all the attention most of the time.  The others have several kids keeping them busy.  Admit it Meri you want a monogamous relationship.  Sam turned out to be fake and now you are stuck with Kody and the rest.  If she is that unhappy maybe she should end it and find someone else.  Mariah will get over it.  Mariah is not in the marriage, so she should forgive her mother and move on with her own life.  

[Marigold]

What's the timeline with Maddie and her pregnancy?  Was she pregnant before marriage?

And if the Maddie wedding is being filmed by TLC, then shouldn't there be money for Mykelti?  Or am I wrong?  i thought Maddie (and the Duggar weddings) got a ton of free stuff from TLC for the wedding.  The Browns (and the Duggars) are all about the budget but the viewers think it's a free ride. 

Anyone know? 

[giaNtsandYankees]

1 hour ago, SongbirdHollow said:

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

True, but that was outside of the Brown Circle, before Janelle became a part of it.

[iii]

2 hours ago, SongbirdHollow said:

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

I think he just meant they haven't collectively planned a monogamous wedding before. 

BUT what really did throw me off was meri saying theirs had been the first monogamous. What????!! I was totally under the impression meri knew kody was poly all along. She brought that up like she was deceived in some way when she wasn't at all

Edited November 30, 2016 by iii

[Tabbygirl521]

3 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

When Meri & Kody were talking, I sensed an odd, condescending tone from Kody, almost like he was trying to calm a person in hysteria. I thought he also has a convenient memory; just what maybe he's comfortable remembering. He has a way of presenting himself as being open minded, but I don't feel this is really the case with him, unless it serves him personally. I haven't watched this show much, but when I do I see markers of someone manipulative & emotionally abusive.

I agree. That whole "I know what page I'm on, but I won't tell you unless Nancy" just pissed me off so much. Yeah, you aren't passive-aggressive AT ALL, Kody. 

2 hours ago, SongbirdHollow said:

And Janelle's was monogamous to Meri's brother. And Robyn's was monogamous with David Preston Jessup. WTH are these people talking about?

I think Kody actually piped up and said that there had already been a monogamous wedding in their family. Meri just amplified. 

[Nowhere]

^^^Yeah one of the other wives said Maddie's was the first monogamous marriage. 

[Granny58]

8 hours ago, MrSmith said:

I suppose the only reason is feeling you're bound to do it or face some serious parental wrath

or a way to receive daddy's approval.  

[Nowhere]

Weird how I don't hate Kody this episode. I appreciated him saying that nothing actually happened between Meri and the imaginary guy. It made me think he was trying to make her feel better. She does have an immense amount of guilty feelings and it's obvious. She continues to beg for some sort of validation and makes a ton of excuses and it is very hard to communicate with somebody like that, especially when you are doing everything you know to do and say and the person just continues to bring things up. Meanwhile, news flash, Kody was hurt too. It's not actually Kody's job to continue to try to make Meri feel better and yet he is still trying. She should be kissing his ass. I know if I was in her situation, I would want to show my husband how much I care about him, make him feel special. The last thing I'd do is whine constantly. Meri is missing a good opportunity to make their marriage better than it's ever been. 

I don't think they can get past this without a mediator so I agree with Kody on this. There's nothing else they can do without professional help, although Nancy wouldn't be my choice. Meri told Kody to leave and I understand her reasons. In fact, I don't blame her for the emotional affair. I just wish she'd admit it but that's beside the point. It's in the past and now she wants Kody. So why is she being such a damn pill? He keeps saying nothing really happened and he wants to move forward and she just won't move on. Maybe Kody should dump her ass. If I was him I'd tell her to hit the road. 

Btw Mariah is such a little bitch. Nobody needs to apologize to her. Of course she makes it all about her. It can't be about mom and dad getting their relationship on track. Mariah has to be part of it and make it all about her. Now they have to go baby her instead of focusing on each other. 

Meri needs more help than just marriage counseling.

I'm so sick of this "catfish" storyline. 

[Granny58]

11 minutes ago, Nowhere said:

Btw Mariah is such a little bitch. Nobody needs to apologize to her. Of course she makes it all about her. It can't be about mom and dad getting their relationship on track. Mariah has to be part of it and make it all about her. Now they have to go baby her instead of focusing on each other. 

Totally.  If this was me, and my son was still being a jerk and "hurt" over it, by now I would just tell him, "hey, call me when you've got it together.  I've had enough."  Mariah is not showing her mother any compassion.  There are REASONS why Meri was taken in, one of which is because she WANTS A MONOGAMOUS MARRIAGE WITH KODY.  It is SO obvious....why won't she just say it?  She won't get it, but she should say it, and then probably move out and find someone else.  Hell, she's already divorced.  

[Nowhere]

10 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

Totally.  If this was me, and my son was still being a jerk and "hurt" over it, by now I would just tell him, "hey, call me when you've got it together.  I've had enough."  Mariah is not showing her mother any compassion.  There are REASONS why Meri was taken in, one of which is because she WANTS A MONOGAMOUS MARRIAGE WITH KODY.  It is SO obvious....why won't she just say it?  She won't get it, but she should say it, and then probably move out and find someone else.  Hell, she's already divorced.  

Yes, and I wish Meri would just admit that she did fall in love with the imaginary guy. The reason she can't let it go and move on with Kody and the family is because she knows she is lying about her feelings and her conscience is getting to her. She knows she's lying so she is going above and beyond to convince everyone that she's not, which makes it seem like she's lying. The lady doth protest too much, methinks. 

If she doesn't want to come clean then she needs to shut the hell up. All of her excuses are laughable and none of them make sense. The story changes every time I hear it and yet Kody is still saying let's move forward and she just won't do it. 

And I agree with you. I'd say the same to one of my kids. 

[EtheltoTillie]

10 hours ago, wings707 said:

I agree with all that has been said.  Putting the wedding of Mckelti and Tony aside for a moment.  Mckelti wants out and out now.  I think that is driving her the most.  She is looking for security and someone who loves her exclusively.  She all but said that in her statement that she feels safe with Tony and he won't hurt her (emotionally).  All the kids see and feel the pain when their mom is having issues with Kody. 

Sibling rivalry is common but in this family you also have rivalry between the micro families.  Does dad love another mother more than mine, does he love his favorite wife's kids more, who is the favorite wife now and does that mean he likes her kids best now, kids see and hear everything. 

Logan and Maddie probably escaped much of this angst being the first borns and clearly favored. Kody spent much more time with them and their mother is a rock. 

I don't remember If any of the kids have said they want a plural marriage, I don't remember any.  No wonder.  I have watched from the beginning but only sporadically in the last several seasons. It moves sooooo slowly with  conversations on a repeat loop. So Mckelti wanted an August wedding more because she wanted out and to have sex sooner than later. There was an element of do you love me enough to give me what I want in there, too.  It was more about Kody's love than Maddie.  Do you love me enough to give me what I want, too. 

She will benefit from this marriage if she holds off on kids.  Tony is her ticket out.  

What is Aspyn doing now? I need a reminder. 

I think Mariah used to say she wanted plural marriage, and she was alone among the kids in wanting that. But it seems she has changed her mind. 

[Meowwww]

Meri drives me nuts. SHE had the emotional affair,yet now she is the victim.  Gurl Please.  

 

Tony is a banker.  Probably at a bank that just was in the news for sales scandals.  He probably was speaking and thinking in a banker's sales mantra about the home equity loan. And he was serious, he probably already had a referral sent to his mortgage person. 

 

Such entitlement.  I just can't.  Spot on about when Logan announces his engagement. The family will celebrate. 

 

Why would Kody have to afford to send her to Seattle?  She is over 18.  I am almost 50 and my generation worked for life, for moving, etc. goes with my Special Snowflake view of millennials.  Ugh. 

[riverblue22]

It wasn't clear to me if Meri still loves Kody and really wants to be a part of the family, or if she just misses having a handyman to take care of stuff like the sprinkler system.

[FakeJoshDuggar]

On 11/28/2016 at 10:28 AM, islandgal140 said:

Ahhh, just when I wondered what I was going to do for fuckery when 90 Day Fiance wrapped up, I get this gem! Thank you TLC!

Wasn't there speculation that Maddy and Caleb's wedding wouldn't be televised because of privacy reasons? I knew that couldn't be true. 

Tony looks alot like Peter Lorre, an old school Hollywood actor who basically played the weird creepy dude in movies, which might explain some people's first reaction to him so far.  

Tony also kinda sounds like the cartoon character Meatwad from Aqua Teen. 

When damn near every adult person describes Mykelti as impulsive, flighty, immature and her own mom calls her ditsy, I tend to believe them and think this rush to marriage is a very, very bad idea. Plus, Mykelti, I think you can do better. 

The audience doesn't know Tony, so joke or not, saying Kody should take out a mortgage to pay for the wedding was in poor taste. Especially since the Browns probably don't have enough equity in their homes to pay for gum. 

The world is using the phrase "Fix it Jesus" but it looks like Kody is going with "Fix it Linda" when it comes to 'marriage with Meri. That is about as honest as Meri and Kody will ever be on-screen, which ain't saying much. Kody was acting like a bad deposition witness will all his "I don't recall." Meri did seem fed up and exasperated with living in exile but still unable to take any personal responsibility or spill all the damn tea. Frankly, a messy bitch like me just wants the tea. 

Meri just needs to leave. She is never gonna get any love, affection or likely even sex from Kody ever again. He is just done with her after the catfish incident. 

If my stomach comes into a room before I do, I would not be acting a fool over cake samples on tv. 

I'm going to be a horrible, shallow person and say this anyway. Poor Tony looks like the end result of a Boston terrier mating with a catfish. Makylti (or however Christine decided to spell her stupid name) can surely find a much better dude than this.

 

Someone at TLC, please find a razor and shave off that peach fuzz from Tony's upper lip. New rule, if you can't grow a proper mustache, wait five years before getting married.

 

I get Mariah's feelings. She was so indoctrinated into their fundamentalist faith that she considered being in a plural marriage. The thought of a woman even thinking about going outside of her marriage is unheard of in their circle. Kody and Mary set of this pristine paradigm that their life was the only way to get into heaven, blah blah blah, that it probably shattered her world when that paradigm came crashing down around their feet. Most of us were not raised in that cloistered environment and can see that she needs to move on, but realizing your entire family life was a sham has rocked her world. Her parents raised her to think that they were the holiest beings next to God. She never counted on Zeus coming down from the mountain and showing off his warts. It's tragic that she's having to live with this on top of the embarrassment all whilst being on television. 

Madison's fiance looks like a Mensa star next to Tony. If Tony was a loyal viewer of the show, he'd know that like brain cells, these losers don't have two nickels to rub together. He is rude and presumptuous to consider that someone should take out a second mortgage to pay for his train wreck of a wedding. No. There's a courthouse and a marriage license is like $35. If you catch Kody on a good day, maybe he can spot you a ten.

[ReadMeLattice]

I don't agree about Mariah. She's not the most likable person, but why would *she* have to be the one to "understand" the situation when her parents don't?

She was basically raised by a single mom who was more friend than mom--because she relied unfairly on Mariah for the partnership and emotional support she should have gotten from her spouse -- and who fed her daily lies about polygamy and religion. (Only way to be happy, only way to go to heaven, only way to find real love, etc.) And a dude who came around once in a while who did the same thing. She's on a literal show, that her parents put her on as a teen, that's supposed to be about how great polygamy is. Her mother is a public figure who did this VERY publicly, and embarrassingly, while being repeatedly warned by Mariah that it was happening. Now are they admitting, hey, we had major issues because of polygamy, Meri wants monogamy and Kody doesn't, and we sort of sold you a bill of goods, and this often happens in arrangements like this? Nope. Back to the show and the Supreme Court cases defending their marriage and the TV appearances about being polygamists. 

So is Mariah emotionally immature and whiny? Yes, but certainly no more than her parents actually involved in the incident. And she was unfairly pulled into the affair, because Meri did this publicly, while Mariah was at home, and because they were already public figures. I don't like Mariah much but if she's entitled and spoiled, Kody and Meri seem far more so in this scenario. 

[ReadMeLattice]

@FakeJoshDuggar, exactly. In their religion, Kody is a literal future God of his own planet, and his wives the chosen ones of God and the prophets. It was hard enough to realize my parents were humans with flaws. I can't imagine the horror if I found out that not only was that untrue, but the people I was raised (without siblings to temper the influence, and while going to an FLDS school throughout most of high school) to believe were basically deities were complete idiots.

Also, of course she doesn't blame Kody. She's had a lifetime of brainwashing telling her FLDS patriarchs are perfect divine beings. 

[DakotaJustice]

3 hours ago, Marigold said:

What's the timeline with Maddie and her pregnancy?  Was she pregnant before marriage?

And if the Maddie wedding is being filmed by TLC, then shouldn't there be money for Mykelti?  Or am I wrong?  i thought Maddie (and the Duggar weddings) got a ton of free stuff from TLC for the wedding.  The Browns (and the Duggars) are all about the budget but the viewers think it's a free ride. 

Anyone know? 

I've always been under the impression that whatever is filmed, TLC pays for at least in part. I also think that they give maximums on what they'll actually spend though. If the browns want more expensive accoutrements then they pony up the excess, but I think we saw an example of TLC's production budget in the Hawaiian vacation. After flying the entire family to Hawaii along with production crew there wasn't much left for the lodgings. 

[AnnieBeez]

8 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

@FakeJoshDuggar, exactly. In their religion, Kody is a literal future God of his own planet, and his wives the chosen ones of God and the prophets. It was hard enough to realize my parents were humans with flaws. I can't imagine the horror if I found out that not only was that untrue, but the people I was raised (without siblings to temper the influence, and while going to an FLDS school throughout most of high school) to believe were basically deities were complete idiots.

Also, of course she doesn't blame Kody. She's had a lifetime of brainwashing telling her FLDS patriarchs are perfect divine beings. 

Why would she blame Kody for Meri's "affair"? Meri is the only one responsible. He may be an asshat [sorry, he IS an asshat], but they were still married. [even if it's not mainstream's definition of marriage] I don't blame Mariah being pissed off. Her mother's an embarrassing idiot. 

[toodles]

Imo, the catfish mess is not where meri' s problem started.  The real problem was the divorce.  We know it was ALL FOR THE CHILDREN ( wringing hands dramatically).

Meri got dumped for the younger model.  Pure and simple.  And I'm sure the baby that followed shortly after the it really, really doesn't matter legal marriage is just a coincidence.  She was completely hurt and pissed off and it left her wide open for some catfishin'

2 minutes ago, toodles said:

 

Edited November 30, 2016 by toodles

[Christina]

Back when the episode aired where Maddie said she wasn't allowed to be a member of the LDS faith, there was an outpouring of support for her and dismay at the church, primarily by LDS members. I don't know enough about the faith to get the terminology right, but as I remember it, the religious elder at the location where she took the classes approved her for membership to the temple. A religious elder above him in the hierarchy said she would have to agree to not be on the show in the future.

Maddie said it was because of her parents being public polygamists, but didn't say they only requested that she not be on the show. The LDS members that had been supporting her and had been vocal about how she should be allowed to join then thought that made more sense then her being punished for actions of her parents, asked her to clarify if it was true, and as far as I know, she only responded that it was a good religion but she had decided not to be involved with a group that wouldn't allow her to be a full member. This took place on Twitter, but there may be an article out there about it. 

In this episode, Kody said something about Mykelti not being allowed to join, either, and asked Tony if he was okay not getting married in the Temple. It made me wonder if Mykelti tried to join looking for the same outpouring of attention Maddie received, and if that is why she is getting married, too. She did say she expected the response Maddie got from her mom and was disappointed.

[Wings]

7 hours ago, toodles said:

Imo, the catfish mess is not where meri' s problem started.  The real problem was the divorce.  We know it was ALL FOR THE CHILDREN ( wringing hands dramatically).

Meri got dumped for the younger model.  Pure and simple.  And I'm sure the baby that followed shortly after the it really, really doesn't matter legal marriage is just a coincidence.  She was completely hurt and pissed off and it left her wide open for some catfishin'

I agee, the divorce was the catalyst in an already shaky relationship.  Bur it was in trouble long before that. Meri not bearing more children was huge for her, as well. She was already feeling on the bottom of the heap when they moved. The wet bar issue was really all about being valued and loved. 

As far back as Jannel becoming the second we saw that Meri was not happy with plural marriage. She was doomed! LOL.  

I am not laughing at her. I feel compassion. 

Her being the only official wife gave her something to hang onto and that was ripped away.

I would like to see some man who knows her story step in and take her away. 

[Wings]

A poster earlier in this thread mentioned Christine and her kids were Kodys least favorite. I have been lax in viewing the past several seasons so missed some details. Can someone give me the Cliff notes on that, please? Thanks.

[VedaPierce]

22 hours ago, booboopbedoo said:

Me too and he just grossed me out!

Wear something pressed and clean to ask such an important question. Does he work? Can he support her?

Can't wait for sex? There are other things you can do.

She will marry him,get pregnant and then come running home next year.

He didn't take it seriously and it showed in his appearance. When something is important, make an effort. No effort was made. Not in clothing choices, and not in his words to Kody. Getting married is not about the wedding. It's about the commitment you make before Gd and witnesses to spend the rest of your life with this person in an honorable way. To work together through thick and thin. Something so lost on so many. 

[Normades]

I think Mariah would show some compassion if Meri would admit she was wrong instead of expecting everyone to gloss over this and act as if nothing happened.  I also understand why Mariah might feel as if she is owed an apology and explanation.  She was brought into this situation and who knows what lies Meri told her.  Remember Mariah was with Meri and JO in Disneyland.  Meri is not a victim in this because first of all, she chose to go along with the polygamist lifestyle and secondly, if the catfish was the young handsome millionaire ready to sweep Meri into her fairy tale, she would be GONE!!  It's hard to consider her a victim or even accept that she is sorry for the pain and embarrassment she caused when you consider that.

[tabloidlover]

9 hours ago, FakeJoshDuggar said:

Madison's fiance looks like a Mensa star next to Tony. If Tony was a loyal viewer of the show, he'd know that like brain cells, these losers don't have two nickels to rub together. He is rude and presumptuous to consider that someone should take out a second mortgage to pay for his train wreck of a wedding. No. There's a courthouse and a marriage license is like $35. If you catch Kody on a good day, maybe he can spot you a ten.

THIS made my morning!!  

[laurakaye]

13 hours ago, LucyEth said:

So Meri is tired of doing life by herself.  So polygamy isn't all that great is it as all the wives seem to be unhappy.  I think Kody does not know how to manage the 4 of them fairly.  Robin gets all the attention most of the time.  The others have several kids keeping them busy.  Admit it Meri you want a monogamous relationship.  Sam turned out to be fake and now you are stuck with Kody and the rest.  If she is that unhappy maybe she should end it and find someone else.  Mariah will get over it.  Mariah is not in the marriage, so she should forgive her mother and move on with her own life.  

It's so frustrating watching Meri suffer.  I want to sympathize with her and at the same time, smack some sense into her!

Yes, she chose the lifestyle willingly.  I think she chose it because she wanted Kody, and she was young and naive and assumed that no matter how many wives Kody eventually took, Meri would be the Special Snowflake because she would always be the one who was legally married to Kody.  We know how she lorded that over Janelle for years and years.  And then...Kody divorced her.  This was supposedly also Meri's choice, but I'd wager that Kody dropped anvil-sized hints to Meri about how afraid he was that he couldn't adopt Robyn's kids, blah blah blah, guilt guilt guilt...until Meri finally caved and gave Kody exactly what he wanted - a divorce.  Maybe she thought that by doing so, she'd rise a few notches on the Wifey Totem Pole, and Kody would give her all the good lovin' again because she sacrificed for the sake of Robyn's kids.  However, that didn't happen.  And Meri knows it.  She got snowed by a man she still loves, and by Robyn, who (if I'm not mistaken) Meri introduced to Kody and suggested that she'd make a great 4th wifey (which I think was Meri's way at getting back at Janelle and Christine, who she also resents for having all the babies and Kody's attention).  Meri messed up big time.  She never wanted this lifestyle, she only wanted it because she wanted Kody.  And now, she's either got to come clean and tell Kody that she never wanted this lifestyle, or suck it up and be miserable.  If she tells Kody the absolute truth, Kody and the other wives aren't going to be overly forgiving and understanding, and Meri becomes the pariah of the family from now on.  If she leaves, she risks losing her daughter.  She's in a lose-lose situation and she knows it.

[Quickbeam]

I finally watched the second hour of this show. Whew. I think part of the problem with Meri's role is that unlike polygamists of old, she was allowed to hole up in her house and isolate herself. Once Mariah was gone, Meri doesn't seem to have factored into the day to day care and feeding of the rest of the kids. Too much time on her hands. 

I can't believe I'm saying this but I did feel like Kody was more genuine than Meri in their 1:1. She's just trying to evade responsibility. She told him to stay away? And now blames him for staying away? Sigh. 

[Nowhere]

8 hours ago, lma said:

Well what about the other wives? As long as she was legal, she could deal with it but the divorce just hurt her to the core. Why? Janelle and Christine never got to be legal. How was that ever fair to them? Do they ever actually admit that being first and legal is of utmost importance and prestige? Nope, they act like everyone is equal and they all just love each other so. They lie too much for me to feel any sort of compassion. 

I don't understand why anyone has to be legal in this messed up lifestyle. How is that fair toward any of the other wives?

If Kody dies, Robyn is his next of kin. I remember a very long time ago, they were all talking about Meri's responsibilities when that time comes.  Whether anyone likes it or not, Meri is, or was, sort of the matriarch. She was there from the very beginning and helped and approved of building the family. She helped to love and nurture both Janelle's and Christine's children and they did the same for Mariah. Everyone trusted that, in the event of Kody's death, Meri would tie up the loose ends. And she deeply loved all of the children. Enter the bimbo Robyn. She's been part of the family for five years and already she has taken over the whole damn thing. She'll never care about all those children like Meri does. I don't care what she says. And not only did she take over but her children are now treated as equals to kody's natural children even though they have a father that they still regularly visit. They can say it doesn't matter but it does. They can say the marriages are spirtitual but at the end of the day the government doesn't give a crap. And the woman who is in debt up to her ears to fredericks of Hollywood is now in charge of kodys entire estate (not saying he has anything just that i wouldn't trust Robyn with 2 pennies), and also end of life decisions. I think a legal marriage is extremely important and I don't think Meri realized until after she was pressured into it and lied to about the need to adopt children, all so Kody can have a new piece. It's not just Meri who should be pissed, it's janelle and Christine as well. 

In regard to Mariah, I don't think anybody expects her to understand. Of course she wouldn't. But she can be decent and stop trying to make this about her.

[Wings]

Meri and Kody are both responsible for their situation.  Neither is a victim. 

Good post laurakaye, that is exactly it. 

[Wings]

Mariah is too young to be expected to understand her mother's complex situation. Meri is struggling to grasp it, herself.  it is shaking Mariah's security in an already tumultuous time in all kids lives. 

[gonecrackers]

Meri perpetually plays the victim & seems to enjoy it, she brought her daughter into her emotional affair, & seems to act quite childish in her TH's with her head somewhat down, poised to cry again at any moment - she seems emotionally incapable for someone her age.

However, I do feel for her in that I don't think she's really okay with the polygamy. Her head & mouth say one thing, but it's possible her body has had a visceral reaction to the emotional stress this has put on her manifesting itself in secondary infertility.

I also recall, even though I haven't watched much over the years, her losing her 'real' job a long while ago due to them coming out publicly with the show. I recall her saying how much she enjoyed her work, & it was a great loss to her. Then Robin, then the dramatic move, whatever that was about. Maybe she never really regained ground in her life since then & since all the publicity.

It will be difficult to start over in any way on her own away from The Family.

Regardless, I don't feel much for Kody regarding the emotional affair. He's been having emotional, & physical, affairs with 3 other women for years. They can all cut her slack on this one but then again, hypocrites must be hypocrites.

Edited November 30, 2016 by gonecrackers

[Nowhere]

Yeah but she's being a complete bitch and it's not necessary. Meri was saying she won't even talk to her. I think it has been long enough now and she should open communication with Meri. Kody forgave her but Mariah won't even talk to her? I don't expect her to be understanding. Just decent.

[Wings]

45 minutes ago, Nowhere said:

Yeah but she's being a complete bitch and it's not necessary. Meri was saying she won't even talk to her. I think it has been long enough now and she should open communication with Meri. Kody forgave her but Mariah won't even talk to her? I don't expect her to be understanding. Just decent.

She will come around in time. She is freaked out about this and I cut her slack. She is young and has  not grown up in a family where she has learned the art of communication or how to deal with conflict!  

Edited November 30, 2016 by wings707

[Janc]

12 minutes ago, wings707 said:

She will come around in time. She is freaked out about this and I cut her slack. She is young and has  not grown up in a family where she has learned the art of communication or how to deal with conflict!  

I think that when you boil it down, all that Mariah is really holding out for is an apology from Meri that yes, Mariah did in fact try to warn her it was a catfish and Meri didn't listen.  IF Meri simply becomes the bigger person and says "I'm sorry, I was wrong for not listening to you" it would (or should) be enough take the fire from Mariah's anger, IF she is mature enough to accept the apology....  two big IFs there about people who I don't think are big enough to do either one.