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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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The Duggars post about politics on social media frequently, but these social media posts are not an invitation to discuss politics here in this forum. This rule extends to Duggar adjacent families, friends, associates etc. Such discussions are a violation of the Politics Policy. 

I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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First of all, who would pay good money to hear Jessa speak about her marriage expertise. She has nothing to bring to the table.

Second, I call bs on we are thinking of adoption. Jill is getting all the attention right now, so I bet Jessa and Ben are trying to catch some it by bringing up wanting to adopt one day spiel.

She is appearing at the one in Memphis. Admission starts at $10. Not a lot of money considering there is others things to see besides her. That's assuming there is anything extra required to see her.

I am seriously thinking of going. It seems like a snark worthy event.

  • Love 1

She is appearing at the one in Memphis. Admission starts at $10. Not a lot of money considering there is others things to see besides her. That's assuming there is anything extra required to see her.

I am seriously thinking of going. It seems like a snark worthy event.

. Oh please please kellylovessnark, you'd be my best friend if you went and brought us the snarky details!
  • Love 4

I personally don't see Ben and Jessa adopting. It's a patriarchal culture, where the men want to brag about "I made that baby," can't exactly do that with adoption. But I think they're probably talking about adoption publicly to drag out the baby making process -- even if it's just by months or years. If JB does his "hardy har why haven't you knocked up my baby girl yet," it's easier to say -- well we're praying on it because we want to adopt so we're trying to figure out if it's better to have our own now or later. Lots of prayer I tell you -- who has time for baby making.

 

In one of the previews Gwen looked utterly shocked when Michelle said she could be a grandma next yr and deflected by saying "one thing at a time." Maybe it's occurred to her and Mike that while early marriage is good so you can have sex without sinning, their 19 yr old uneducated, unemployed son need not make babies immediately. They've gotten to know Jessa a bit and probably realize she isn't a kool aid drinker like Jill who'd want her own 2 dozen kids; I wouldn't be surprised if they've said or hinted to the couple or maybe to just their son, that they should enjoy being a married couple for a bit and figure out their lives, and there's no rush for babies as that'll just strain a new marriage.

 

I kind of feel bad for Ben but I kind of don't. In a way -- it isn't fair that he gets the nasty run down house while Derick gets a mansion. But I don't feel bad because the reality is that house was renovated -- all of the shots of their omelets and protein shakes on IG always show granite countertops and stainless steel fixtures, so while the house isn't huge like Derick's -- it's a newly renovated small home and how many people just get one handed to them upon marriage at age 19!? I almost wish Ben would get pissed off about something in his own mind re how he is treated and that inspires him to realize that he has to rely on himself and look out for his own family. It can be done. I know he's not college educated and I kind of doubt that he's seriously pursuing his coursework online (though who knows), but it is still possible to have a middle/lower middle class life in the U.S. without college. There are all kinds of guys who work hard in construction, manufacturing, truck driving and driving for carriers like UPS who make decent money. I know the Duggars have a "you should own your own business and never work for anyone bc they may not be Christian," but Ben is the headship of his own family now and if working for a company makes him money, he doesn't need JB's approval. I know he seems more like a white collar/office work guy, but it is possible to start at a factory or in construction and work your way up to management. I really don't think Chad Paine has a college degree, but he's an office manager for a metals company in Tn; he's probably 6-7 yrs older than Ben, but I imagine he first had to gain experience in metals/manufacturing on the factory floor and then worked his way up so that when he moved to Tn for Erin, he was able to go into management rather than factory work.

  • Love 1

Ben and Jessa really annoy me with "The house isn't very big, but it's big on love." What a sense of entitlement! How about you two go out and get real jobs and stop suckling off the Duggar teet?

Daddy Duggar has you right where he wants you, so you just keep believing you're forging your own path there, Mr. & Mrs. Seewald.

  • Love 11

Ben and Jessa really annoy me with "The house isn't very big, but it's big on love." What a sense of entitlement! How about you two go out and get real jobs and stop suckling off the Duggar teet?

Daddy Duggar has you right where he wants you, so you just keep believing you're forging your own path there, Mr. & Mrs. Seewald.

I think it's worthwhile to remember that Jessa has been working, both in the household doing things that a parent should be doing (but isn't because they have 19 kids) and ever since the first TLC special was filmed. Part of those TLC earnings are hers. Why shouldn't she expect things as a result?

  • Love 9

Yes, the Duggar children may have worked for the family their whole lives, but those houses that they live in are still under the ownership and control of their families; as are these marrieds themselves. The only differences in their lives are that they are finally allowed to sleep with their guys under a different roof, but their lifestyle accountability and financial accountability is still reported to Jim Bob....it's apparent in the marriage counseling episode with derickdillard at the yogurt shop that these guys are still required to tow the Duggar line....Cutting the cord? No way, baby; they both are still beholdin' to Daddy Duggar, just the way he wants it. Both couples IMO are playing house.

  • Love 4

I think it's worthwhile to remember that Jessa has been working, both in the household doing things that a parent should be doing (but isn't because they have 19 kids) and ever since the first TLC special was filmed. Part of those TLC earnings are hers. Why shouldn't she expect things as a result?

 

Because from other families who have had TLC shows have said, TLC has the family incorporate, and TLC pays the incorporation a set fee.  How much each person in the corporation receives from that fee is up to whomever is in charge of said corporation.

 

Children are paid, or not, according to what the head of their corporation decides to pay them.  There might be some families who get the lump sum for each episode and put a percentage of money into savings accounts for each of their children.  I suspect that a majority of the families don't do that.  I wouldn't be surprised if the Little People couple set up separate accounts for their kids, but I'd be shocked if Kate G did so for her kids.  Then there is the issue of what restrictions the 'corporation' puts on the children's accounts.  When an account is created for a child, the corporation can set it so that the money put in can't be accessed until the child reaches a certain age, or the account could be accessed at will by the corporation.  Some accounts are set up so that only money can be taken out for the benefit of the child, but that is a tricky thing.  The corporation could then determine that buying the child food, clothing, school expenses, and medical care are all fair game under the 'benefit of the child' restriction.  The end result is that the vast majority of the children appearing on reality shows will have very little or no money to show for it when they reach the age of 18.

 

However, once a child is 18 they have the option of staying with the program, or renegotiating a new contract.  The longer they've been required to film under the old contract, the harder it will be to go against the established routine.  I suspect Smugger stayed with the party line for a few years, but when his connections with the Duggar name got him his job in D.C., he renegotiated and now gets a separate salary.  I also suspect that his wife and kids are dependent on how much he decides to give them for filming.  My guess is they get nothing, but they've been raised to follow their headship in all things so they won't think anything about it.

 

Jill and Jessa are different.  They are submissive females in a patriarchal society.  They were supposedly raised to follow their father until marriage and then follow their husbands.  But they have very different personalities, very different spouses, and in ten years they might be leading very different lives.

 

Jill has spent her entire existence looking to JB for love, guidance, and validation.  She's crushing hard on her new husband, but I've no doubt that if Derick told her to do one thing and JB told her the opposite, she'd do what JB said.  Jill married a man who has more education than her own father, and a good job.  But they're still in the honeymoon stage of their relationship, and Derick has so far followed the Duggar Party Line.  Right now Jill is in charge, but she's getting her instructions from JB.

 

Jill has probably used her magic to get Derick to agree to filming and be paid whatever JB deems appropriate.  We'll see if that still holds true when she's trying to give birth with a TLC crew and cameras right there, and she and her attendants are constantly being asked to give talking heads.  If the Dillard family is given their own show, as some have speculated, then I think that they'll get a separate contract and merry hijinks will ensue as Jill tries to follow both her father and her husband.

 

Jessa has also been raised to do whatever her father says, but she's also seen to be more independent.  Her family has all but called her a bitch, and more power to her.  But now she's married to a very young man who is firmly under JB's thumb.  I get the impression that JB pretty much pushed Bin at Jessa because he realized on some level that she wasn't like poor downtrodden Cinderella Jana, and wasn't the enthusiastic koolaid drinker like Jill.  JB had to get Jessa married off fast, so when dim Bin showed up all starry eyed over Jessa and had his family fully backing his lust-filled fantisies of bagging the 'hot' Duggar, JB jumped on that train and let Jessa's own desires to take hold.  Remember that Jessa met Bin before Jill started skyping with Derrick.  She probably thought that even though this young man was three years younger, he was besotted with her, her father wasn't opposed to him, and if she could land him she'd finally get some freedom from her family.

 

Even though courtship in their world is supposed to be about six months, the courtship of Jessa was taking longer, probably because JB was being passive-aggressive and because his precious Jill had attracted the attention of Derrick.  JB wasn't about to let the younger, 'wild' sister marry before Jill if he could help it.  He might have even thought that Bin would get bored and wander off, but that didn't happen. 

 

JB should have remembered just how fixated a teenaged boy could become on a girl.  He zeroed in on Michelle and remembers their first meeting, but Michelle has said she doesn't remember it.  Whatever, JB delayed Jessa and Ben to the point where Ben's father started a blog aimed at pushing the marriage.  JB got the last laugh, though.  Jill got married first, and was pregnant before Jessa and Ben even got to the alter.  And JB gave Jill a very nice house and Jessa got to look forward to a small house with a mold problem.

 

You know, I don't like most of the people on this show, Jill and Jessa included, but I hope that TLC arranges a decent job for Bin at least 400 miles away and gives Jessa and Ben their own show, with their own contract.  I just like the idea of messing with these peoples sanctimonious, hypocritical, smug little world.

  • Love 6

I think it's worthwhile to remember that Jessa has been working, both in the household doing things that a parent should be doing (but isn't because they have 19 kids) and ever since the first TLC special was filmed. Part of those TLC earnings are hers. Why shouldn't she expect things as a result?

You make a great point if Jessa and Ben want to continue to be under JB's thumb for the rest of the lives. They are playing house in someone else's house doing what Daddy tells them to do and thinking they are living this independent, autonomous life. Quite the opposite! And in the same breath, passive aggressively complaining about the size of their house probably in comparison to Jill's (not Jill's, but Daddy lets Derick & Jill think so as long as they go along with everything he tells them to do).

  • Love 2

So Jessa and Ben are considering buying a TV to watch football, cooking shows and the Andy Griffith Show? I wonder what they do when they watch it now on the computer and Andy has a "DATW" with Helen and kisses her without a chaperone? Do they not watch those racy episodes? So silly, it's beyond belief...

I wonder how Jilly and derickdillard are doing without a TV? I'm sure derickdillard watched TV; does he miss it? I don't think strict Jilly Muffin will allow it as she is more orthodox than Jessa Blessa.

I think Derickdillard and Jill do have a TV.  Didn't we see it at some point?

 

I was actually impressed with how nice Jessa's house turned out.  Looks like JB put some money into it.

 

These kids aren't going to rent from JB forever.  It's just not the Gothard way.  Those men are expected to take care of their own families, and JB has lots of other kids to cycle through his rental properties.  I wouldn't be surprised if JB hasn't sat Ben down and explained that to him.  It's temporary assistance, and Ben needs to carry out his plan for future independence.  JB worked hard to support a family and he is not going to want leeches around for long.  I'm sure Derick is saving money for his own house as well. 

I agree with the fact that Michelle and Jim Bob still want to control their kids after they leave home, but it's realistic to assume that they will be able to do so forever. There are just too many of them, and even though he's wealthy now, I'm sure Jim Bob won't have as much money in 20 years or so. Probably some of their kids will still be at home, but he

won't be able to provide them all with houses, jobs, etc. If his kids aren't dependant on him for money, and there is no tv show by then, what incentative do they have to stay 

under his thumb? Many of the kids will be in their 40's by then and like it or now, will be exposed to the outside world and ideas. I'm not sure how many people will be following

Gothard either by that time, the lifestyle doesn't seem sustainable for multiple generations to thrive. 

Edited by CarolMK

I think Derrick "deserves" the bigger house because he is employed and will require fewer resources over all. I know young love can be blinding especially with a sex outlet now but I don't think I'd want to marry someone who couldn't take care of himself without my dad.

Though they are married they are just playing house with no real responsibility that should come with it.

And it's no bfd to wait until your 19 to screw.

  • Love 3

Jana may make out better than anyone imagines re: gifts from complete strangers when it's her turn to marry. She's the one who's been keeping things together at that house since she was a pre-teen; anyone who actually bothers to read anything about the Duggar family hopes at the very least she'll either find someone who's crazy about her and get married and/or she's out on her own soon if that's her choice.

 

Free Jana. She deserves a life (and her own possessions) ASAP. And I can't wait to see the seething looks of fury on both Benessa and Jill's face when Jana's wedding (if that's what she'd like) eclipses theirs.

Edited by Missy Vixen
  • Love 1

Funnily enough, I am beginning to think that Jessa and Bin will be the ones breaking away the most. Derick has turned out to be a terrible disappointment but those two are showing signs of independence.

Agreed. It helps that Jessa has always had an independent streak -- not a kool aid drinker like Jill, so she wants to rebel and she married a guy who she can control a bit. Plus he seems a lot more "manly" than Derick in that I can see him wanting to be the headship and do things his way -- Jessa will just convince him that HER ideas are actually HIS or THEIRS. With Jill -- you have someone who 100% wants to stick to the lifestyle married to a man who is willing to change himself and ignore his own upbringing entirely in order to make his wife happy.

Boob is a puppet master. He's managed to keep Jill and Jessa under his control by providing both a place to live and, in Jessa's case, making sure her young husband is firmly under his thumb and beholden to him. It's absolutely no coincidence that he married her off to an uneducated teenager. He's got the two them right where he wants them.

If Ben decided he'd had enough, his options would be limited. He'd have to leave the newly remodeled (courtesy of Boob) house and either find a crappy low rent apartment somewhere or move Jessa in with his family. Not going to happen.

I'm sure Boob has finance guys working to make sure his older children get as little as possible from TLC. Control is everything to him and he isn't about to surrender it willingly.

Edited by Hpmec
  • Love 2

Boob is a puppet master. He's managed to keep Jill and Jessa under his control by providing both a place to live and, in Jessa's case, making sure her young husband is firmly under his thumb and beholden to him. It's absolutely no coincidnce that he married her off to an uneducated teenager. He's got the two them right where he wants them.

If Ben decided he'd had enough, his options would be limited. He'd have to leave the newly remodeled (courtesy of Boob) house and either find a crappy low rent apartment somewhere or move Jessa in with his family. Not going to happen.

I agree with much of what you're saying, but I see this a little differently. Yes, as things stand, JB has Ben under his thumb. But, if Ben and Jessa can hold off getting pregnant (fingers crossed) and look past playing house in wedded bliss and look at the big picture by getting Ben to finish his undergrad as soon as possible before they start having kids then he has a chance to make a life for he and Jessa without Daddy putting the squeeze on him and calling the shots longterm. He needs to apply himself by getting a scholarship and finishing his undergrad as an on campus student with he and Jessa living in married housing or somewhere close by. Ben wants to go to seminary eventually, so I hope he's smart enough to get his undergrad degree in a secular field so that he has something to fall back on. Pastors, especially in the beginning, generally start out as youth pastors or pastors of smaller and rural churches and make very little money or they are bivocational. Hopefully someone with some sense is advising Ben.

Edited by msblossom
  • Love 4

It was somewhere in this thread I think.  I never heard if they figured out if they were a troll or not, but I can't imagine someone trolling purely to pretend to lick John Shrader's ass.

Thanks for that link. The detail Shraderfriend provided (along with the photos) that was later verified on the show makes me inclined to believe he was telling the truth. Somewhat ironically, he is the one who comes across most reasonably in that thread; everyone else seems to be frothing at the mouth.

That's how I remember reading it at the time. That person got slammed by the regulars (of which I am no longer one, due precisely to this kind of herd mentality), but in the end appears to have been vindicated. He also posted a picture of his daughters playing in the front yard after a snowstorm, so it dates his residency (IIRC, about four months) to a time that post-dated Smug's residence there. 

 

I have no idea how long it took Boob...errrr.....TLC to do the mold abatement/remodeling, but I would wager that this started sometime back in the spring, many months before the engagement was formalized. Shraderfan was long gone by then. As far as the remodel goes, even if Jessa wasn't going to get the place, it made sense to fix up the place for the income. Not to mention, if the engagement didn't come to pass, TLC just had to scrap the scenes of them at the house "checking out the place" before they started working on it. No skin off their teeth, really. 

  • Love 1

Jessa posted a video on her Jessa Seewald facebook page of Ben interviewing Jinger about turning to God. I have no idea on how to post a link to the video. It was painful to watch. I was trying not to laugh so hard while watching it. Maybe someone on here can post a link to it.

The video is the most recent post : https://www.facebook.com/JessaSeewald  Not sure how to directly link to the video, I couldn't get it to open in a separate window.

 

I laughed when I saw that Jessa identifies herself  an author on the page.

Jessa posted a video on her Jessa Seewald facebook page of Ben interviewing Jinger about turning to God. I have no idea on how to post a link to the video. It was painful to watch. I was trying not to laugh so hard while watching it. Maybe someone on here can post a link to it.

 

The video was something else.  It seems to show Jinger is fully drinking the kool-aid, and it also tells me that the religion Ben was raised in doesn't differ much from Gothard.  He and Jinger used the same lingo - God gave them "a burden for the lost".  And shouldn't Jinger be spelled Jinjer?

 

I saw a wedding photo on Jessa's facebook page that really irritated me.  I'm sure you all discussed it already, but I somehow missed it.  After making the big to do about refusing to kiss for the first time before an audience, they quickly lost all concern.  In the pic I'm referring to, Jessa and Ben are kissing, as well as Josh and Anna.  JB & Michelle (as well as half the rest of the family) are faking shock and outrage.  Poor Jana - she knows how ridiculous the whole thing is.  Didn't even one person scream "NIKE!!!"?  I'm defrauded, and if I was married, I would be consulting a divorce lawyer tomorrow.

  • Love 3

I'm sorry, but I don't know what kind of guilt trips their parents rammed down their throats to make them feel that they were such grievous sinners. Every.little.thing. is sin to them. I personally could never live a life like that. 

 

And why pass out those stupid "Good Person Tests" when you know that you can't even pass it? It reeks of arrogance if the recipient thinks that the person giving them that tract IS a "good" person. 

 

Ray Comfort - and his stupid tracts - can all rot in hell. 

  • Love 13

Wasn't Jinger younger than 14 when the first specials aired? So she was faking being a christian then, but had a come-to-jesus moment when the bucks came rolling in?

I think it's like a lot of people. They may grow up in a religion or no religion, but as a teen they decide for sure what it is they believe when they can understand. In a lot of Protestant denominations, people don't often get asked when they were saved, but Baptist and Fundamentals do often ask. I've always believed in God and Jesus for as long as I remember, but I don't know when I was old enough to truly have a good understanding. For a lot of Baptists, they're baptized when they become saved, so often it's kind of cemented as an actual, recognized event.

I was baptized as an infant and did confirmation at 12- fully believed before then- along with most everyone else that age in my Methodist church- and then baptized again as an adult in a Fundamental Baptist church. Maybe Jinger was baptized around the age of 14, which is what she's referring to. It doesn't mean she wasn't Christian before that. I think she would believe she was a child before that who didn't have the complete understanding in her mind and heart and soul.

  • Love 1

Wasn't Jinger younger than 14 when the first specials aired? So she was faking being a christian then, but had a come-to-jesus moment when the bucks came rolling in?

Interestingly, the year she was 14 was pretty much the entire calendar year of 2008, the first year they shot the series. So no big bucks YET; they were at the very beginning of taping and wouldn't know whether they would be successful or not. I DO wonder if the cameras on her more of the time than the old specials had some sort of effect on her that cause her Come to Jesus moment? I can only imagine the peer pressure; having an older sister like perfect, pious Jill-the-Snitch couldn't have been fun. I bet Jinger felt a lot of guilt from her (and others) growing up. 

 

@Darknight, yes. Original Sin. They're pretty much doomed from birth until they're saved. That's a prime tenet of Calvinism, which is the theology Ben was raised in, and seems to be bringing to the young Seewalds' study. Free will? Fuggeddaboutit. Everything Ben's put out there points to him being even more militant than his very militant father. He's the type I'd tell to fuck off if he tried to evangelicize me on the street (because I look so broken or whatever it was that Jinger said...like she really knows what's in people's minds or hearts!). I really hate those "I'm right/you're wrong, I'm better than you" types. Benessa reek of that entitled attitude, and Jinger's interview doesn't give me much hope for her, either. 

  • Love 5

I watched the video and think that what's going on here is that Ben is trying to launch some sort of online ministry. No degree in theology required. The conversation with Jinger seemed to be kind of an amateurish practice run, but I would not be surprised if this becomes a regular deal and pretty soon he's asking for donations. He doesn't want to be stuck cleaning toilets for Boob forever and needs to become more financially independent. Jessa is already promoting it to her fan base. Who knows, they might just be poised to become the Jim and Tammy Faye of the internet.

Edited by Hpmec
  • Love 6

Wasn't Jinger younger than 14 when the first specials aired? So she was faking being a christian then, but had a come-to-jesus moment when the bucks came rolling in?

She also still lives at home. Doing these kinds of videos may raise her favor with JB and Mechelle and make them easier to live with, etc. Most of the people, if not all, are Christians. She may want to stay in with peer group. 

I doubt if she wanted to be an atheist or talk about evolution, that would go over well. 

Uh, yes, Jinger, we all are sinners, that is what baptism is about...removing Original Sin...don't all Christian faiths practice that at various times in one's life? That's why Catholics, BEN, baptize in infancy...so that stain is removed, giving and opening up the avenue for grace, which helps us to be more godly and avoid sin in the first place. We, then, BEN, have confirmation; a sacrament in which the candidate renews their baptismal promises themselves upon reaching the age of discernment, around 12-14. I wonder what Ben, Jessa and Jinger would have to say about that?

  • Love 5

Just want to add that most Protestants do not believe infant baptism erases original sin. A looooong time ago it was an added precaution because there were so many infant deaths, but now, in certainly the large majority, it is seen as a promise of the family and church to try to raise the child in the Christian faith.

From my experience with Fundamentals, while they'd love for everyone to join their church, their main point in evangelizing/the tracts is to make sure or try to get people "saved"- and he spells out what that is- "admitting Jesus is son of God and He died for sins, needing Jesus because I'm a sinner and He's the Savior." To them, while baptism is an important outwardly sign to God and your church and sacred, it's not necessary to being saved.

When giving tracts, if the person wants to talk, the giver of the tracts is supposed to make it clear that they are sinners, too, and once you're saved it doesn't mean you'll suddenly be perfect on Earth.

I think this was a plug for Christians to get and give out those tracts. It is good practice for Ben if he keeps making videos on certain topics.

  • Love 1

jmt111; thank you for your post. I enjoy learning about other practices and beliefs..having said that, I would hope that Jinger, Ben, etal, would respect the religious style of other Christians. They certainly expect respect from us, they need to give it too...after all, we ALL are going for the same thing in a nutshell: "something better after this life",, aren't we? I am put off by the elitism of the Duggars and their followers. A true Christian, or any religious/spiritual believing person should respect the worship customs and style of others.

  • Love 6

For me this video has no content, just meaningless words. And I get the feelings that is the same for these people. I guess it's nice if they get some sort of comfort from this gibberish, but heaven help them if they pass me one of their 'gifts'.

I've enjoyed reading all the posts about the video. Jinger reminded me of Priscilla Waller when she was talking. Her only sin is that horrendous eye makeup. (Sorry, that's all I could dwell on while watching.) Mr. Articulate could barely get the words out explaining the tracts. He better add public speaking courses to his studies if he wants to become a minister.

  • Love 3
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The Duggars post about politics on social media frequently, but these social media posts are not an invitation to discuss politics here in this forum. This rule extends to Duggar adjacent families, friends, associates etc. Such discussions are a violation of the Politics Policy. 

I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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