Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Marigny]

[ChocolateAddict]Jessa and the rest of the kids would do well just to wash their faces morning and night.  I don't think that they have been taught the importance of removing make-up and washing your face twice a day.  They don't seem particularly fussed by hygiene in that house and I don't think that the girls would be bothered to take off all that heavy make-up every night.  Even if Boob and J'Chelle don't want their kids to use medication or really strong cleansers, they could do small things to make a difference - less processed crap, more actual skin cleaning, making sure the pillowcases are washed regularly.  It just makes the acne look worse when you stack 5 layers of foundation on top.

... And maybe wash their bedding

And their makeup brushes. Considering that hygiene doesn't seem to be that big of a priority, I can't imagine how much bacteria is hanging out on those brushes.  

[GEML]

We know boys use hairspray too (and a lot of it, to follow JB's example) which is why I thought of it. I do think genetics comes in to play, but it seems to have hit certain of the Duggar children pretty late, which is a little odd.

[JenCarroll]

Eh, it hit me late. I never really had much until my early twenties through my mid-thirties. It happens.

Edited June 16, 2015 by JenCarroll

[DangerousMinds]

I read today on an anti-Duggar FB feed that the pic of Jessa in the closet was taken at the Bates' house/closet. Some posters seemed to be very sure of that. FWIW.

Edited June 16, 2015 by DangerousMinds

[BitterApple]

I read today on an anti-Duggar FB feed that the pic of Jessa in the closet was taken at the Bates' house/closet. Some posters seemed to be very sure of that. FWIW.

Wow, if that's true, I'm shocked. I can't imagine the Bateses wanting anything to do with the Duggars at this point and I don't remember Jessa being especially close to any of the Bates girls. God, do any of these people work? It's amazing how Bin and Derick can just float around to wherever they feel like.

[Sunnybobs]

Genuine query - why would the Bates not want anything to do with the Duggars? I'm assuming they (at least the parents) probably knew what Josh did from old. I understand they might need to be separated due to tv contracts but personally there could still be friendships between them couldn't there?

[GEML]

I'm not only assuming that Kelly and Gil knew, but Gil may have been one of the "Elders" consulted. I just don't see Jim Bob being accountable to people within his own church, but it's also true that everyone within Gothardism falls under someone else's "umbrella of authority." If Jim Bob fell under Gil Bates' (among others) they may have some responsibility here for how the decisions were made at the time.

[EarlGreyTea]

I feel really weird asking this as I know any answer would likely be speculative, but took a stroll through Jessa's instagram thing and was wondering, is she a mean girl?  I get this vibe from her based on the instagram, mostly due to the type of passages and comments she's posted. Would she be a Regina George if she were mainstream?  Or am I way off the mark?

 

Had Jessa been allowed to go to college, I imagine her as a sorority girl with an iron fist. Ben would be a brief college relationship and she'd go on to marry a slightly older rich man and have only two kids.

 

Her makeup looks really caked on, wow. Makes her look harder. I guess stress and the pregnancy are taking its toll. The braid is nice, finally a change from having her hair down constantly. Also, I will never, ever, believe she doesn't care if the show is canceled. It's her bread and butter, yeah, but she clearly loves the attention and cares what people think.

 

[Sew Sumi]

I'm not only assuming that Kelly and Gil knew, but Gil may have been one of the "Elders" consulted. I just don't see Jim Bob being accountable to people within his own church, but it's also true that everyone within Gothardism falls under someone else's "umbrella of authority." If Jim Bob fell under Gil Bates' (among others) they may have some responsibility here for how the decisions were made at the time.

Gil was NOT consulted. This church was pretty much run by JB and Jim Holt, who were both elders. Holt was the elder who was consulted I forget the name of the church, but after the fiasco, they left and formed the homechurch we saw in the very first special. Jim Holt was also the "expert" consulted w/r/t professional counseling. He worked as a chaplain at a local facility for minors who ran afoul of the law. All of this information (as well as the name of the facility) is easily found on Holt's own bio. Historical information regarding the church "elders" was sussed out on Free Jinger. He argued against Josh attending the CHRISTIAN facility that he had a big stake in. They obviously tried to fix this 'in house" and not involve professional facilities. This was in 2003, a year after the first abuses as well as JB's primary loss. Were they so concerned about image even before TLC came into the picture? And if so, why?

 

Back to Jessa: I hope she has an uneventful pregnancy, but is it wrong that I hope that she gains about 40 more pounds? She seems to be more like Anna, gaining some weight all over, than Jill, who was all belly. Pregnancy hormones haven't cleared up her face either, but I can't say that the acne is any worse than it was before she got knocked up. It seems that most of the Duggars' acne is late-adolescent onset; Joy and the almost 17 year-old twins are next on deck. 

[Joe Jitsu913]

Had Jessa been allowed to go to college, I imagine her as a sorority girl with an iron fist. Ben would be a brief college relationship and she'd go on to marry a slightly older rich man and have only two kids.

Jessa would definitely be trophy wife material had she been allowed to choose her own spouse in "the real world". Bin would have been her dumb jock, high-school sweetheart.

[RazzleberryPie]

Jessa is a Mean Girl and would rival Regina George if she had the opportunity to attend school. She's vain, bossy, aggressive, angry and aware enough to have some insecurities about how weird and hypocritical her family really is.

 

I think the whole Duggar gang is acne prone, but the girls also cake on the thick foundation and bronzer, topped off with a ton of hair goop (Aussie mousse and sprunch spray, which I didn't know was still manufactured) and probably not changing pillow cases or washing enough. 

 

I think the Bates absolutely knew about Josh's activities, and that's one of the main reasons a Bates/Duggar courtship never happened. I don't think Gil Bates is JimBob's counsel or authority figure or whatever. The dynamic between Gil and JimBob would've reflected that, but instead they just seem to be frenemies who tolerate each other in a friendly, fellowshippy manner, but that's about it.

[Wellfleet]

The picture is backward. Check out the hand holding the camera.

 

As for hairspray, they use a TON. They used Aussie Formula super duper strength (don't recall its exact name) to lock in those beachy waves. I think several things contribute to Duggar Girl acne. That said, what's the excuse for the boys? Most of them are even worse. 

 

Poor diets, poor hygiene, poor genes - in different combinations. There are lots of easy, inexpensive & natural treatments that are helpful for acne and other skin issues but everyone's biochemistry is different. What works for A might not work for B. They should do some Internet research and try a few things. But that would require being curious about the world, so it's unlikely to happen.

[Sew Sumi]

If the Bateses knew about Josh, it was through the fundie grapevine, not due to up close and personal knowledge on Gil's part. The posters who dug up the research on FJ were adamant that Jim Holt was the point person in that situation.

 

Jessa is absolutely the Regina George of fundieworld. She has never stricken me as a very nice person to anyone aside from Ben, once she decided to relent and allow him to really court her. Heck, Ben was nicer to Jinger when she started crying at the rehearsal dinner. 

 

Jill is Cady Heron, pre-Mean Girl makeover.

[PinkSprinkles]

Jill is Cady Heron, pre-Mean Girl makeover.

 

 

Eh, I see Jill more as the girl who said Regina punched her in the face once and it was AWESOME. 

Edited June 17, 2015 by PinkSprinkles

[Sew Sumi]

But, but...HOMESCHOOL JUNGLE FREAK! :D

 

minus the crazy mad math skillz...

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

It could also just be her genetics. Even with treatment I still get a bad breakout once a month and that's using RX meds and seeing a dermatologist regularly. Sometimes your body chemistry is just predisposed to zits no matter what you do.

Eh, it hit me late. I never really had much until my early twenties through my mid-thirties. It happens.

Me, too. I have had adult acne worse than acne I had as a teen from my mid-twenties on. I've seen doctors, gotten Rxs, etc. and I'm religious about washing my face twice a day, etc. My dermatologist said it was caused by hormones and some people are just more predisposed to it genetically. Hormonal birth control actually made my acne worse. You can cleanse and try all the treatments out there and while it may get better - for many people it doesn't go away. It is upsetting when people assume that because a person has acne, they aren't cleaning their face or taking care of their skin. (I'm sure the way the girls cake on make-up doesn't help, but for all we know they may be seeing dermatologists, cleansing their faces, etc. And in all honesty, if I was on a reality TV show I'd probably have my face caked in makeup to cover up my acne anytime a camera was around or whenever I left the house in case anyone asked for a picture. I'd be trying to cover it up so people wouldn't have the ill-conceived notion that I have acne because I have poor hygiene as that seems to be a common assumption.) I assure you that everyone I know with moderate to severe adult acne has tried everything and is not a slacker in the hygiene department- so when you see an adult with bad skin, don't assume poor hygiene and not trying treatments/pills/etc is what's going on. /end rant

I hate defending the Duggars. I wish Jessa would have at least had my luck - my skin cleared up during pregnancy (the acne has since returned but it isn't as bad as it was).

Edited June 19, 2015 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[KatWay]

The Duggars absolutely seem like a family that is predisposed to acne. Most of them have bad skin and that can be genetic. Me and my sisters all got really terrible skin in our teens and nothing at all would ever help, except for hormonal birth control. And we took amazing care of our skin, tried everything (no makeup, no bangs, water cleansing, etc).

 

Still, I imagine the pounds of makeup that Jessa uses on a daily basis can't help.

[dillpickles]

Stress also causes acne in some people. I know i broke out when I'd get stresses out, and this probably isnt a fun time for anyone.

The picture is backward. Check out the hand holding the camera.

As for hairspray, they use a TON. They used Aussie Formula super duper strength (don't recall its exact name) to lock in those beachy waves. I think several things contribute to Duggar Girl acne. That said, what's the excuse for the boys? Most of them are even worse.

Testosterone causes acne too Which is probably why the boys are worse off.

[GEML]

I still think people who think of "Elders in the church" in the traditional Baptist sense aren't fully aware of how Gothard power structures work. Im not convinced that someone like Gil Bates was not consulted. And through official channels, not the grapevine. But that's me.

[msblossom]

The thing is, most people start off imitating other people's stands. That's completely normal. We tend to parrot the views of our parents, or the people we most admire, because we haven't seen or experienced enough of the world. But Jessa seems kind of stuck. I'm glad she's moved from her family to the Seewald sayings, as it does prove she can be taught. I'll be honest, I wasn't sure. It's not as though she's 15.

I'm glad Jessa is learning and expanding her beliefs, but I have to say it's a shame she's learning from Michael Seewald! I dislike him almost as much as Jim Bob. He's hateful, have you ever read much of his blog or the way he engages with anyone on his blog who disagrees with him? They give good, respectful, and sometimes biblical arguments and he annihilates them in response. He is extreme and closed. Jessa parrots a lot of the hardcore teaching, and she completely misses the fullness of the gospel which encompasses grace.

[GEML]

Oh yes, he's another who has it all figured out with no grace or humility. But I always thought Jessa was never on board the "keep sweet" bus, and at least in Calvinism you don't have to, even as a woman. She can be as obnoxious in her own right as she wants to be, instead of only allowing her husband or father to speak for her. She's never, likely, going to be compassionate, but at least you'll know where you stand with her. To me, that's something, and for where she started, it's actually growth.

[Lemur]

 

But Jessa seems kind of stuck. I'm glad she's moved from her family to the Seewald sayings, as it does prove she can be taught. I'll be honest, I wasn't sure. It's not as though she's 15.

 

Physically she's not, but mentally ... ehh.  I just don't see a lot of intellectual horsepower going on there.  

[msblossom]

I am somewhat Calvinistic myself, GEML, you could call me a 3 out of 5, I guess, and I find the Seewald's brand of Christianity bordering on belligerent. I think we're just seeing more of Jessa's real personality to be honest, and then you add her hyper-Calvinistic Christian beliefs to the mix and she's insufferably off-putting.

[anony mouse]

Oh yes, he's another who has it all figured out with no grace or humility. But I always thought Jessa was never on board the "keep sweet" bus, and at least in Calvinism you don't have to, even as a woman. She can be as obnoxious in her own right as she wants to be, instead of only allowing her husband or father to speak for her. She's never, likely, going to be compassionate, but at least you'll know where you stand with her. To me, that's something, and for where she started, it's actually growth.

I agree. As much as I disagree with what she's saying, the fact that she feels free to do so and not just defer to "ask my husband" in a simpering tone is real progress, I think.

[Dawn16]

The Duggars absolutely seem like a family that is predisposed to acne. Most of them have bad skin and that can be genetic. Me and my sisters all got really terrible skin in our teens and nothing at all would ever help, except for hormonal birth control. And we took amazing care of our skin, tried everything (no makeup, no bangs, water cleansing, etc).

 

Still, I imagine the pounds of makeup that Jessa uses on a daily basis can't help.

I'm an middle-aged adult and still have the kind of skin that breaks out if I wear any kind of oil free moisturizer/suntan lotion/concealer (even the kind the salon insisted would not cause break outs), so I sympathize and tend not to blame bad skin care.  She'd probably have much better skin if she didn't wear all that make up, but a girl who cares about her appearance and gets photographed for magazines is going to have a hard time breaking a heavy makeup habit long enough for her skin to clear up.  She's certainly not going to post photos of herself without makeup or go on TV without it.   

[GEML]

From above - it's not, per se, her Calvinism that makes Jessica obnoxious. But any religion (or tenets of it) used in a self-righteous manner that is, and it just happens, in Jessa's case, that poor John Calvin has to bear the brunt of it.

[Lemur]

Yeah, it's pretty much Jessa that makes Jessa obnoxious.  She could dictate the phone book in the same tone and mannerism and it's be obnoxious.

[dillpickles]

I wonder how many Duggar kids have the same attitude as Jessa. I don't even think Josh is as, for a lack of a better word, ballsy as Jessa. Sure, he spouts out hate and fire and brimstone, but that was part of his job.

Jessa lets you know how she feels for free. And even though i don't agree with what she says at all, i can't help but like her for that. She seems more "religious" than the rest of them. Like, a militant sort of religion. Like Jill for example. She's a good gothard approved wife, who will never talk back to her husband or fire and brimstone you.

Jessa's (female) siblings stick to the whole keep sweet thing but Jessa seems like she'd have no problem thumping a bible right in your face, countanace be damned.

Edited June 17, 2015 by dillpickles

[GEML]

I've always thought that in their push to force Jessa into a Gothard worldview, they'd pushed her all the way through. She sees every little sin her parents make - meaning, I think, HER children will be raised in a REAL Christian home.

[Aja]

I don't know, righteous anger coupled with religious zealotry is a bad combination.

[Sew Sumi]

Blog post. I have to disagree about how they "lovingly point people to Christ." Ha!

 

http://theseewaldfamily.com/2015/6/grateful-and-blessed

[Aja]

Blog post. I have to disagree about how they "lovingly point people to Christ." Ha!

 

http://theseewaldfamily.com/2015/6/grateful-and-blessed

"Our little family is, by God's grace, going to continue seeking to lovingly point people to Christ and encourage those who are down."

Translation: We're still clinging desperately to the hope that TLC will give us a spin off.

 

"We recently had an ultrasound, but aren't revealing our firstborn's gender yet. Can't wait to welcome this blessing from God into the world!"

Translation: Please TLC give us a spin off.

Edited June 17, 2015 by Aja

[Sew Sumi]

Yeah, that pretty much confirmed my suspicion that the ultrasound was filmed, be it by TLC or Jason (aka DuggarFilms). They are definitely coming back. 

[galax-arena]

Blog post. I have to disagree about how they "lovingly point people to Christ." Ha!

I've been saying this a whole bunch of times in the wake of the recent Southern Baptist Convention, but if this is how they show love, I'd rather they just hate me then. Please. 

[Marigold]

I didn't know they have a blog. Thanks for sharing. 

I love flipping through Duggar stuff for some reason. Well, I guess I don't have to explain that here. :)

[JoanArc]

Yeah, that pretty much confirmed my suspicion that the ultrasound was filmed, be it by TLC or Jason (aka DuggarFilms). They are definitely coming back. 

I don't know that it's indicative of a comeback. They really don't know how to normally announce anything, anymore. I wont dispute that they desperately WANT to come back. I think they'll find that while millions of people film their lives, that doesn't guarantee a TV show.

[AnJen]

Re: the Duggar skin, I their genetics probably tend towards acne, but I think the severity of it is helped along by poor diet and poor hygiene. My family is split; about half of us have clear skin even through puberty, and the other half gets horrible acne, so I feel like I see enough genetically-caused acne that the Duggars look different to me, I suppose?

 

All of the Duggars have that pale, slightly puffy look of people who've seen a lot of starch, a lot of sodium, a lot of preservatives, and relatively little fresh produce. The Honey Boo Boo family, even the thin sister, all had the same look. Eating primarily pre-packaged foods will do that to you. I find it interesting that the Duggars don't follow a code of health of any sorts...every major religion seems to have one: Judaism, Islam, Mormonism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Seventh-Day Adventist, etc. There are dietary restrictions given in the Bible (Leviticus, I think?), so it's weird that people who take the Bible so very literally don't have some kind of guideline at all. With 20 kids and all that land you'd think a garden would be pretty easy for them. 

 

The mass amounts of hair products don't help, and I sincerely doubt that sheets or pillowcases are being washed weekly. 

[Sew Sumi]

I don't know that it's indicative of a comeback. They really don't know how to normally announce anything, anymore. I wont dispute that they desperately WANT to come back. I think they'll find that while millions of people film their lives, that doesn't guarantee a TV show.

I hope you're right, but I find Benessa's non-reveal indicative of someone who knows how to keep a secret until they get paid to divulge it. 

[PinkSprinkles]

Re: the Duggar skin, I their genetics probably tend towards acne, but I think the severity of it is helped along by poor diet and poor hygiene. My family is split; about half of us have clear skin even through puberty, and the other half gets horrible acne, so I feel like I see enough genetically-caused acne that the Duggars look different to me, I suppose?

 

All of the Duggars have that pale, slightly puffy look of people who've seen a lot of starch, a lot of sodium, a lot of preservatives, and relatively little fresh produce. The Honey Boo Boo family, even the thin sister, all had the same look. Eating primarily pre-packaged foods will do that to you. I find it interesting that the Duggars don't follow a code of health of any sorts...every major religion seems to have one: Judaism, Islam, Mormonism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Seventh-Day Adventist, etc. There are dietary restrictions given in the Bible (Leviticus, I think?), so it's weird that people who take the Bible so very literally don't have some kind of guideline at all. With 20 kids and all that land you'd think a garden would be pretty easy for them. 

 

The mass amounts of hair products don't help, and I sincerely doubt that sheets or pillowcases are being washed weekly. 

 

They do follow a diet of sorts. They don't drink alcohol and don't eat pork products. 

[GEML]

I suppose if you use the verse, "he chastens whom he loves" and modify that to "we try to scare the pants off of people in order to lead them to Christ" it makes sense. Or maybe not. I think Jessa is many good things, but "loving" isn't one of them. (Not a snark - most people wouldn't describe me that way either, when there are other positive words to choose from.)

[CofCinci]

RE: Duggar skin

They don't take daily showers/baths.

[Sew Sumi]

This is what we'll be subjected to if they do the rumored spinoff. About as exciting as watching paint dry.

 

https://instagram.com/p/4DPLLMDfsO/

[bluebonnet]

I take it neither have advanced to the intellectual level necessary to play chess?  

 

Wow, I didn't know I could be this snarky.  

[JenCarroll]

Zzzzzzzzz

[SmallTownMom]

Wow, did anybody read the comments from the "fans" on the pic of Jessa and Ben playing checkers?

 

"You are the most beautiful precious couple I have ever saw."

 

Most of the comments smack of homefoolin.

 

Please, no spinoff.

[EarlGreyTea]

I take it neither have advanced to the intellectual level necessary to play chess?  

 

Wow, I didn't know I could be this snarky.  

 

Candyland seems like it'd be a real headscratcher for these two.

[zenme]

Gosh.  It looks like Jessa is attempting to play chess, and Ben is playing "black discs vs. red discs."

[bluebonnet]

It seems a while yet before they can graduate to Candyland.  That look of intense concentration on their face makes it seem like they've only recently graduated from Connect Four.  

 

Someone should send them a love offering backgammon board.  

 

To be fair, I remember reading somewhere that playing board games with a spouse is a good exercise for relationships.  And at least it's not them up on a bully pulpit.  I'd probably watch a show of them playing board games if it means they do nothing at all to 'minister'.  

Edited June 18, 2015 by bluebonnet

[JoanArc]

Someone should send them a lover offering backgammon board.

I think you mean 'Love Offering'.  A Lover Offering certainly would draw in the viewers. ;)

 

And Fundie games? The only winning move is not to play.

[Happyfatchick]

"Your so cute together"

Disregarding the typo, going for the other obvious. What is CUTE about that? Staring at a checkers game is cute? We all think it's a boring pic, and in fact, THEY look bored.

My fave. "Goodness that looks so nice and relaxing...jealous for sure."

Ooooooooooooooooh, ME TOO!!!!!