Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[Prevailing Wind]

 

Omigosh, I know who you mean!  That guy has the most awkward smile.  Creeeeeeepy.

But, boy! Can he do "Jazz Hands" !!!

[merylinkid]

 

She didn't sound as much educated as much as she sounded like she was straight up reading from a prepared index card, and I think he said about three words.

 

 

 

 

Clearly ya'all have never heard players talking about a game.   They sound exactly like that.   And the announcers aren't much better.

[RCharter]

Clearly ya'all have never heard players talking about a game.   They sound exactly like that.   And the announcers aren't much better.

The thing is....I have, and they didn't sound at all like that.

 

I've heard players, fans, and even casual watchers....even sports broadcasters make it sound more like a coherent conversation and less like a prepared speech.

 

And players/fans generally talk about the game at hand when they are going to the game, or to watch the game.  And its a conversation, not one person weirdly talking about the overall status of the team for a minute.

[Dirtybubble]

 

This probably belongs in the Christmas commercials thread but if I have to listen to Best Buy explain why I have to "win" at Christmas I'm gonna scream!  How the F do you win at the holidays?!?!  It makes me hate & embarrassed by commercialism. 

[DeLurker]

In which case, I'd say Best Buy is losing, not winning.

[Ubiquitous]

Okay, I watched the Sofia Vergara head and shoulders commercial again (because clearly I hate myself and desperately need counseling).  She does say, "My baby's all grown up" according to the captioning.  And she is talking to him about how to do well in an interview.  So, it's her son.  It still annoys me to a level of total disgust.  Grabbing his shoulders while he walks and making the kissy face makes me super stabby.  If she reacts this way when he washes his hair, what will she do if he actually accomplishes something more significant? After all, he appears to be grown.  The act of washing his hair with dandruff shampoo, especially when it does not look different than it did prior to using H&S, really does not seem to warrant her excessive reactions.  Can't she just go away now?  She can take her son, their shampoo, diet pepsi, her coffee machine, her overdone accent and her OTT acting with her.

Her son can stay with me. ;-)

I am so tired of Sheldon Couper in those Intel ads!

[peacheslatour]

 

How the F do you win at the holidays?!?! 

Simple, I do it every year.  I stay the hell away from the in-laws!

[Cobalt Stargazer]

listen, clearly one sister tanned a little, and got her hair done.  They do not look remarkably different and I hate Olay for even making me question if this is valid, because of course it isn't.

 

And by the way you dumb broads, maybe if you stopped wearing the same clothing, people could tell you apart.  And honestly, if people still can't tell you two apart after 30+ years, neither of you are that special or important.  Just enjoy playing twin pranks on everyone!

 

Months ago in this thread, there was an ad for the Discover card where two women were talking on the phone, and the rep realized that she was speaking to her twin when the other woman said, "Awesomesauce!" Because she didn't recognize her own sister's voice. If the people who can't tell these other sisters are as smart as that, no wonder they're always being mistaken for the other.

[CoyoteBlue]

OH MY GOD, what is with the speech impediment of the singer in this Glade commercial? 

 

"Let tshshlove be the schlschsong" It's like Sylvester the cat with a mouth full of marbles. 

 

Edit : http://www.ispot.tv/ad/Aw0M/glade-winter-collection-the-greatest-gift-song-by-kevin-ross 

Edited November 14, 2015 by CoyoteBlue

[Maharincess]

"I'm taking beedy into my own hands" I can't unhear it now!

Curse you people!

Same here! That's all I hear now when that commercial comes on and I always think of you guys.

[Prevailing Wind]

Something's wrong with that link to the Glade commercial.  It takes me to the top of this page.  <shrug>

[Aquarius]

Okay, I watched the Sofia Vergara head and shoulders commercial again (because clearly I hate myself and desperately need counseling).  She does say, "My baby's all grown up" according to the captioning.  And she is talking to him about how to do well in an interview.  So, it's her son.  It still annoys me to a level of total disgust.  Grabbing his shoulders while he walks and making the kissy face makes me super stabby.  If she reacts this way when he washes his hair, what will she do if he actually accomplishes something more significant? After all, he appears to be grown.  The act of washing his hair with dandruff shampoo, especially when it does not look different than it did prior to using H&S, really does not seem to warrant her excessive reactions.  Can't she just go away now?  She can take her son, their shampoo, diet pepsi, her coffee machine, her overdone accent and her OTT acting with her. 

 

I just hate Sofia Vergara, but I don't care if that's her son.  She's walking a fine line between smothering mother and Sante Kimes. 

 

Okay, I exaggerate  A little. 

Edited November 14, 2015 by Aquarius

[Brattinella]

Sante Kimes!  I'd forgotten about her.

[theatremouse]

I am so tired of Sheldon Couper in those Intel ads!

I don't know that it's relevant to what bugs you, but I'm pretty sure Jim Parsons is playing himself in the Intel ads; he's not in character as Sheldon.

[Bort]

I don't know that it's relevant to what bugs you, but I'm pretty sure Jim Parsons is playing himself in the Intel ads; he's not in character as Sheldon.

I hope for his sake that Jim Parsons IS playing somebody and that he isn't really that irritating.

[Bastet]

It was kinda my impression that her parking might mean she is a mucky - muck within the team's organization,so she was able to triple super impress him.

 

I like that, because if her "You're surprised, aren't you?" thing she does at the end was that he wasn't expecting to have VIP parking and tickets, rather than he wasn't expecting her to actually know anything about the team they were going to see, the commercial would not get my dander up.

[Magog]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyRjXpXkom4 (Dr. Pepper Commercial)

 

I like College Football a lot, but what I don't like is seeing some creepy guy shilling for Dr. Pepper at a stadium & acting like it is some sort of badge of honor. I see him a lot while watching College Football & I hate him a lot.  Frankly, that guy is creepy & irritating and I don't know why Dr. Pepper would want this loser shilling for their crappy soda. I haven't drank Dr. Pepper for a very long time (over 10 yrs) & I'm not about to start drinking that crap now because of this jerk.

Edited November 14, 2015 by Magog

[peacheslatour]

 

I haven't drank Dr. Pepper for a very long time (over 10 yrs) & I'm not about to start drinking that crap now because of this jerk.

 

Is it the prune juice?  It's the prune juice isn't it?

[Brattinella]

Yummy prune juice!

[Ohwell]

In addition to the gazillion times a day they run the commercial, the girl in the Kia commercial driving her BF to the football game gets on my nerves with rubbing the pitch under her eyes.  A lot of women know about football--I'm no novice myself--but she just takes it too far to show how knowledgeable she is.  Big whoop.  

[WescottF1]

That Campbell's soup commercial with the two men doing bad Darth Vader imitations while they feed their kid soup is causing much ado on a couple of their Facebook pages.  Made some entertaining reading during my downtime at work this morning... whooboy.

[pandora spocks]

This probably belongs in the Christmas commercials thread but if I have to listen to Best Buy explain why I have to "win" at Christmas I'm gonna scream!  How the F do you win at the holidays?!?!  It makes me hate & embarrassed by commercialism.

 

Then at the end of this monstrosity, music from Rocky is piped in at an inexplicably loud volume usually startling me.  By the way, Best Buy, Rocky lost in the first movie.

 

I'm so fucking tired of seeing Peyton Manning in commercials, especially the one where he sings in a dopey voice, "chicken parm tastes so good."  Now Papa John's boasts that you can now "eat like a NFL player."  Stupid advice if you're diabetic or have other food issues."  Of course, Manning is in this crapfest. 

 

I want to weigh in on usage of the word "hack."  When I saw the title How to Hack Your Way Through Your Period in an online article, it made me cringe.  Unpleasant visualizations crept in my mind.   To me, a hack is someone who's incompetent but continues to yearn for respectability.  It's an asinine fad that I hope fades into obscurity.

Edited November 14, 2015 by pandora spocks

[Ubiquitous]

I want to weigh in on usage of the word "hack."  When I saw the title How to Hack Your Way Through Your Period in an online article, it made me cringe.  Unpleasant visualizations crept in my mind.   To me, a hack is someone who's incompetent but continues to yearn for respectability.  It's an asinine fad that I hope fades into obscurity.

Hack makes me think of something one does using a machete.

I don't know that it's relevant to what bugs you, but I'm pretty sure Jim Parsons is playing himself in the Intel ads; he's not in character as Sheldon.

I don't know if he's playing Sheldon in that ad, but he sure reminds me of him.

[ari333]

The kid in the soup commercial has two dads who seem to love him and have fun feeding him while doing silly impressions that are cute imo. OH.  The horror. :)

 

I will pay to stop "PULL THAT PIE-EECH" lady. (pie-eech = peach)

[CarpeDiem54]

While this commercial could be heartwarming, I hate how this song is sung. Upthread someone (I'm sorry, I don't remember who) said it sounds like Sylvester the Cat is singing it. The lisping is unbearable. I looked it up to see what woman is mangling the lyrics.

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/Aw0M/glade-winter-collection-the-greatest-gift-song-by-kevin-ross

To my horror, it's sung by the man who brought us this same song last year.

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7EIo/glade-this-is-my-wish-featuring-kevin-ross

[crowsworks]

The most unrealistic thing about the pop commercial on the airplane. (you're so cute one) is the full can of pop she gets. Tiny cup or if you're on Spirit... bring your own.

I mean she gets toe WHOLE can!

[Milburn Stone]

I don't know if he's playing Sheldon in that ad, but he sure reminds me of him.

 

And that's on purpose, of course. The best way (IMO) to describe what's going on is that the ad plays on Jim Parsons' identification in the public mind with the character. He's not exactly Sheldon in those ads, but he's not exactly not Sheldon either. In fact there'd be no reason to hire him to represent a super-genius high-tech company if not for the Sheldonesque qualities he's expected to bring. If Parsons were foolish enough not to act like Sheldon in those spots, there's no doubt in my mind the director and agency would set him back on course. If any of us had a cup of coffee with the real Jim Parsons, I'm guessing we'd discover a different guy than the "Jim Parsons" of the Intel ads.

Edited November 15, 2015 by Milburn Stone

[Neurochick]

Holy incestuous vibe, Batman!

 

I'm confused, you can't be affectionate with your own child now?  Boy, people have certainly become fucked up these days.  I knew that was her son.  

 

Now, the commercial I can't stand is the one for some sort of car you can test drive.  A woman and her son take Christmas presents out of a car; and there's a salesman in the car who asks if they could go back to the dealership, and the woman says, "Don't you want to meet my family?"  WTF, who says that?  Why would you ask a total stranger to meet your family?  I can't stand commercials where people are selfish, all about ME, ME, ME and it's supposed to be seen as cute.  

Edited November 15, 2015 by Neurochick

[ari333]

I loathe the car commercial in which the real life Urkel  (Jaleel White?) drives with his mannequin wax self.

[Bort]

The most unrealistic thing about the pop commercial on the airplane. (you're so cute one) is the full can of pop she gets. Tiny cup or if you're on Spirit... bring your own.

I mean she gets toe WHOLE can!

United will give you the whole can.

[Aquarius]

I'm confused, you can't be affectionate with your own child now?  Boy, people have certainly become fucked up these days.  I knew that was her son. 

 

Well, I guess some people are smarter than the fucked up others.  But to me, looking like you're half an inch from planting a big wet one on your son's lips is going beyond parental affection.   At least the kind of parental affection I'm comfortable with.  And this is going back years.  It's not some sort of PC affectation I've picked up in recent times.

[janie jones]

I think she's overly affectionate given the circumstances in that commercial but it doesn't seem incestuous to me, especially since she goes to kiss him on the cheek.

 

The kid in the soup commercial has two dads who seem to love him and have fun feeding him while doing silly impressions that are cute imo. OH.  The horror. :)

He has two dads who seem to be completely unaware that he's plenty old enough to feed himself.  That's what bothers me about that commercial.  (Maybe this makes perfect sense since this is a commercial, and in commercials dads are often completely incompetent about stuff like that.)

[MaryPatShelby]

United will give you the whole can.

Delta too.

[JocelynCavanaugh]

Delta too.

And Virgin America!

[SmithW6079]

I'm confused, you can't be affectionate with your own child now? Boy, people have certainly become fucked up these days.

No, no you can't, because then it gets all "rape-y." Now I have to go to my safe space because you didn't post a trigger warning. :-)

The commercial for Krave cereal creeps me out. The cereal pieces stalk the poor little piece of chocolate, fake its alarm clock, and then devour it as it walks in what it thinks are its slippers. I don't want a breakfast cereal made up of serial killers.

[Rick Kitchen]

Or cereal killers.

[WescottF1]

Or cereal killers.

 

Reminds me of a story from my youth.  I worked at the movie theater in our local mall when I was a teen.  The film schedule was such that we'd be busy for an hour or so in between showings and then once all four movies were going, we had a lot of idle time.  This was 1989 so hair metal was the popular music then and a couple of the guys I worked with played guitar.  We read guitar magazines between rushes a lot of the time.  There was a guy we worked with named Mike who was really good looking and popular but dumb as a rock.  He was looking at one of the magazines and there was an Ibanez guitar ad with Mr. Big's guitarist Paul Gilbert sitting at a table eating a bowl of guitar-shaped cereal with the caption "CEREAL KILLER". 

 

Mike studied the ad for a while and then out of the blue goes, "I don't get it - who would wanna kill cereal...?"

 

Yeah.

[RCharter]

I loathe the car commercial in which the real life Urkel  (Jaleel White?) drives with his mannequin wax self.

That ad only makes me sad, because a Steve Urkey/Jeleel White commercial could be HILARIOUS.  Even a Steve Urkey/Stephan (his cool alter ego) commercial could be funny.  That commercial wasn't funny...missed opportunity :(

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Mike studied the ad for a while and then out of the blue goes, "I don't get it - who would wanna kill cereal...?"

 

Yeah.

 

Rose Nylund: "I think if someone tried to kill cereal, they should see a psychiatrist." *laughs*

 

Dorothy Zbornak: "Don't talk for the rest of the afternoon."

[Fostersmom]

OH EM GEE!  The HandeeBra!  Have you guys seen this thing?  It's a pouch that hangs down under your bra. It's so handy, why you can keep your credit cards, passport, lipstick and EVEN a pen in it!  Can't you just see yourself standing at the check out at Rite Aid and the cashier says "o.k., that'll be $37.40" and you reach up under your shirt and start rooting around, looking for your credit card, going "Gee I know it's in here somewhere...just let me take off my shirt for a sec....."

 

I worked retail in various ways from 1994 to 2014 and let me tell you, there's nothing worse than bra money… except damp bra money. I kid you not. Okay, wait, there's one thing worse. When someone, mostly men, pulls a handful of change out of their pocket and dumps it on the counter and there's pubes in it. Yep, that happens too. Also sock money. That one is the least gross. Ankles aren't so bad. I've seem more than one meme make the rounds of retail employees of signs stating no bra money accepted. Honestly, the HandeeBra would be a step up. Awkward, but it would keep direct skin to skin contact down.

[Rinaldo]

I'm confused, you can't be affectionate with your own child now?  

The last episode of Crazy Ex-GIrlfriend devoted a song to this phenomenon: a father sang about his love for his daughter, and kept having to backtrack to clarify that he meant it only in an appropriate, non-creepy way, and then had to clarify the clarifcation... ad infinitum.

[Watcher0363]

The thing is....I have, and they didn't sound at all like that.

 

I've heard players, fans, and even casual watchers....even sports broadcasters make it sound more like a coherent conversation and less like a prepared speech.

 

And players/fans generally talk about the game at hand when they are going to the game, or to watch the game.  And its a conversation, not one person weirdly talking about the overall status of the team for a minute.

I said earlier that I like the commercial for various reasons. However, I must point out, the commercial is about a car, not a woman taking her boyfriend to a game. So when she is using her football speak the car is doing similar things. Such as when she speaks of the back breaking free, the car makes a smooth move to pass a couple of cars. When she says the guy is a beast the car runs through a pot hole which apparently no one felt. Every time she uses football speak it correlates to a feature of the car.

[RCharter]

I said earlier that I like the commercial for various reasons. However, I must point out, the commercial is about a car, not a woman taking her boyfriend to a game. So when she is using her football speak the car is doing similar things. Such as when she speaks of the back breaking free, the car makes a smooth move to pass a couple of cars. When she says the guy is a beast the car runs through a pot hole which apparently no one felt. Every time she uses football speak it correlates to a feature of the car.

The problem is that for me....it doesn't make the commercial sound any less lame.

 

Maybe they were going for something interesting, but it just came off like some woman flatly delivering a 2 minute monologue on a football team.  The commercial IS about a car, but the focus is this woman talking about football, and to me its so awful that I end up focusing on the woman and her terrible flat delivery of a weird monologue about football and not at all about the car.  That makes the commercial about 2x worse, because at least a bad commercial that clearly connects with the product is an advertisement for the product.

 

I may laugh at the penis pump commercial, but they aren't hiding the ball in any way whatsoever (pun intended!).  I don't think that sort of subtlety works in commercials, and I don't think that people should have to put so many connections together when someone is trying to sell them something in a short ad.

[butterbody]

Ugh. The Gain commercial is back where the man wipes his face on a towel, and from somewhere else in the house, his all knowing wife yells "you're using the dogs towel."

I don't have a dog, but if I did, he probably wouldn't need his own towel and if his stank doggy ass were that foul, I wouldn't hang his towels up with general population towels, but worst of all, what kind of surveillance system is this chick looking at, where she can police her husband's towel use from another room?

[Moose135]

...what kind of surveillance system is this chick looking at, where she can police her husband's towel use from another room?

 

Women just know, trust me, they just know...

[RCharter]

Ugh. The Gain commercial is back where the man wipes his face on a towel, and from somewhere else in the house, his all knowing wife yells "you're using the dogs towel."

I don't have a dog, but if I did, he probably wouldn't need his own towel and if his stank doggy ass were that foul, I wouldn't hang his towels up with general population towels, but worst of all, what kind of surveillance system is this chick looking at, where she can police her husband's towel use from another room?

The biggest saving grace of that commercial was the look the dog gave the man....pure comedy!

[St. Claire]

The most unrealistic thing about the pop commercial on the airplane. (you're so cute one) is the full can of pop she gets. Tiny cup or if you're on Spirit... bring your own.

I mean she gets toe WHOLE can!

 

The only time I've gotten a whole can of soda is when I've ordered ginger ale and the flight attendant told me that not many people order it, so they would have to throw out the remainder in the can if they only gave me what fit into the little cup. Even on Delta (I haven't flown Virgin America or United), I only get a cup if I order Coke or Diet Coke. I'm also bothered by that commercial because the line "I want to wear you like a suit" makes me think of the bad guy in Silence of the Lambs.

[Ubiquitous]

United will give you the whole can.

but they overcharge you for it.

[topanga]

Nissan Altima commercial that runs 4 times an hour:

 

Woman picks up date to watch football game and she is rabbiting on with her "knowledge" about the game by saying the following:

"Our running back is a BEAST"

"When he hits the hole and breaks through the secondary, OH he's GONE."

"And our linebackers? They dish out punishment and NEVER quit."

 

What kind of INANE dialogue is that? Is the joke that she knows nothing about football and is just stringing together random football words?

I would hate this ad less if I didn't have to hear it 10 times a day.

I agree. On the one hand, I like seeing a young couple going to a football game together. And the wife/girlfriend isn't complaining about it. And they're both so pretty. 

 

But the woman obviously doesn't know jack about football. She recites her lines like she's pretending to be someone who likes football, and someone in the crew told her how the lines are supposed to sound. 

 

Part of it is the writing. "They dish out punishment and never quit." What does that even mean? Does anyone ever quit in the middle of a football game (except Randy Moss, who admitted to doing just that).?

[BabyVegas]

The most unrealistic thing about the pop commercial on the airplane. (you're so cute one) is the full can of pop she gets. Tiny cup or if you're on Spirit... bring your own.

I mean she gets toe WHOLE can!

Oh god, THAT COMMERCIAL. I'm so distracted by the song that I can't focus on anything else. If someone told me that I was so cute they wanted to wear me like a suit I'd nope outta there so fast it would make someone's head spin. Who greenlit that song?!

Also I think there was some discussion of Chevy's commercials awhile back. Those commercials fill me with a boiling hot rage. Two of them, especially. The one where they put the focus group's phones into a woodchipper and then tell them they have a better way to stay connected? 1. They weren't having trouble until you stunt-destroyed their phones, so your logic is crap. 2. We do not need more people "staying connected" while they drive. Put the effing phone down and focus on the road! And the other commercial is a recent one where they give them one second to solve a math problem and then tells them that the Chevy car they're advertising can do it. I don't need to know exactly when my fourteen-year-old base model is going to hit the car in front of me if I'm going faster than they are but I can figure out in a split second that I'm going to hit them at some point and slow down to a safe following distance. That stupid effing car isn't smarter than I am and I hate the trend of the way car companies advertise these features because it feels like they're encouraging the driver not to pay attention because screw it, the car is watching.