The Duggalos: Jinger and the Holy Goalie

[Sew Sumi]

The question is whether Jessa would choose companionship over comfort. She has access to FaceTime for the former. Any lessening of her role on the show diminishes the latter as her split in the checks dwindle. 

She'll choose the money.

[Churchhoney]

3 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

The question is whether Jessa would choose companionship over comfort. She has access to FaceTime for the former. Any lessening of her role on the show diminishes the latter as her split in the checks dwindle. 

She'll choose the money.

Plus, in Tontitown it's a stronger guarantee of major show money PLUS auntie moms -- massive free babysitting. Laredo -- not so much. Cause Jingle ain't gonna do that shit. ha 

(you go, Jingle)

Edited September 28, 2017 by Churchhoney

[Sew Sumi]

Yup, all taken into consideration when I thought about comfort, but money is first and foremost.

[Nysha]

The show would be a whole lot more interesting if Jessa & Ben moved to Laredo and started loosening some of the tight Gothard rules they live by. Who knows, Jessa might be willing to enroll Spurgeon in a Mommy & Me playgroup or even a Christian preschool if she didn't have her sisters available to babysit.

[kokapetl]

Binny is reliant, perhaps “dipindint”, on the busywork employment that JimBob provides.

Edited September 28, 2017 by Kokapetl

[ariel]

On ‎9‎/‎26‎/‎2017 at 3:18 PM, SMama said:

 Even as a minor league player he is used to negotiations. Of all the SILs Jeremy is the only one with real adulting experience. 

Even as a low level of a player Jeremy was,  I think he had an agent doing the negotiations. 

As far as Jeremy being the adult, the bar for being an "adult" is set very low for the Duggars  son in laws.  He seems to be very controlling.  That might pass to some as being more adult like.

[AnnieBeez]

8 hours ago, Lunera said:

I think moving closer to Jinger would be good for Jessa and Ben. They could totally do it if they start saving up their paychecks instead of handing it over to Boob. They never will, though.

But would it be good for Jinger? I don't think so. I think she's enjoying her distance and the freedom that comes along with it. 

[Gemma Violet]

23 hours ago, PuhLeeze said:

But would it be good for Jinger? I don't think so. I think she's enjoying her distance and the freedom that comes along with it. 

Yeah, you can be sure Jinger would be the designated baby sitter for Spurge & Henry.

[floridamom]

I agree that Jessa OR ANY Duggar moving to Laredo near Jinger would not be good for Jinger. Space away from them is what is good for Jinger. Jessa would try to draw her back in the 'fold'.

[Absolom]

Jinger and Jeremy don't look they are going to be issuing any invitations or offering assistance for anyone to move to Laredo.  I don't think they'd mind so much if Ben and Jessa moved to say Austin.  Weekend trip driving range would probably be OK with them for Jessa and likely not any of the other married couples. That would be the worst situation for Jessa losing the babysitting and meals at the TTH plus not gaining her sister at her beck and call. 

[mythoughtis]

I don't think Jinger and Jeremy want to be babysitters on more than an occasional basis.  Jinger might feel obligated, but Jeremy won't.  Nor will he feel obligated to allow Ben and Jessa to take over the house and their lives.  Jessa rearranging his apartment didn't sit well with him.  If any of the Duggars start visiting  every weekend or so, look for the Voulos to move farther away.  Jeremy commented on social media about a dream job editing Christian books in Scotland.  It may only be a dream, but if the right opportunity comes along..... furthermore, I think Jinger is happier than she has ever been.  Those smiles of her in pictures seem Authentic these days. 

[floridamom]

I thought Jeremy was called to be a pastor? Editing Christian books in Scotland, or anywhere else, isn't being a pastor/preacher. It's being a book editor, Christian themed or not.  I'm quite surprised to read that post about him. I agree that Jinger has never been happier. I'm glad she has a nice house and the room and privacy she didn't have before.

[leighdear]

I think most of these things Jeremy refers to wanting to do all fall under the generic heading of having a "Ministry".  Not just preaching a sermon on Sundays to the same group, but a whole crapload of Jesusy stuff that would look good on a CV and impress the general public with it's uniqueness factor.  

So he should really tell people he wants to edit Christian books for handicapped children in Scottish orphanages.  In Spanish. 

[flyingdi]

"Let's move to Scotland!"

"Where King James wrote the bible!"

"Huh?  Wait what?"

"I have it on good authority that King James wrote the bible in Scotland."

"Let's enroll you in some sort of schooling!"

[mythoughtis]

As I said... dream job. My dream Job,  life, retirement situation is just that - a dream. I'd miss reality after awhile, because that's where family and friends are. Do I think the Voulos will move to Scotland? No, and I doubt Jeremy thinks so either. However, I don't think his dream is to pastor a tiny church either. I don't think that's where his talents are. Lots of people think they are meant to do or be something they aren't capable of.  There's no shame in Jeremy changing professions should he decide to. God isn't going to smite him. 

Edited October 1, 2017 by mythoughtis

[Churchhoney]

22 hours ago, floridamom said:

I thought Jeremy was called to be a pastor? Editing Christian books in Scotland, or anywhere else, isn't being a pastor/preacher. It's being a book editor, Christian themed or not.  I'm quite surprised to read that post about him. I agree that Jinger has never been happier. I'm glad she has a nice house and the room and privacy she didn't have before.

I don't think he wants to be a pastor so much as he wants some job -- preferably a conservative-Christian-themed, probably Calvinist, one -- that gives him prestige and a rep as an intellectual and some sort of leader and makes him feel good. Editor at some biggish-name Calvinist press (Edinburgh-based Banner of Truth, cough cough, the one whose books he's recently been hugging and expressing his love for online) might do nicely for that.  (although he hasn't tried being an editor yet, so he doesn't know what that's really like ....) 

If "pastor' per se were really a strong goal, I think he'd look a lot more engaged with his plant church and with that pretty exclusively now (we'd see a lot about it on his social media, for example), as it's in its very very early stages of growth, if growth ever occurs. As it is, I see him being engaged with a bunch of different religion-focused activities, preaching at the church, loving those conferences and flitting around to as many as he can get to, and hugging Calvinist books and trying to make an impression on their authors and publishers. Marrying Jingle and inheriting all the Duggar media attention.

To me, it looks like sort of a broad-spectrum approach to the job search. He wants to be a conservative-Christian big shot, so he's doing and saying as many things as he can think of related to that in hopes that one of them will pan out as a path to a job that really makes him feel good. ....

If he doesn't find such a conservative-Christian-themed job that satisfies his ambitions within a decade or so, it wouldn't really surprise me if he started trying for a better career in some other realm entirely. 

Edited October 1, 2017 by Churchhoney

[Jellybeans]

If Jeremy wants to edit Christian books in Scotland, good for him.  It is more ambition than any Duggar SIL.  No snark from me.

[bythelake]

4 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

I don't think he wants to be a pastor so much as he wants some job -- preferably a conservative-Christian-themed, probably Calvinist, one -- that gives him prestige and a rep as an intellectual and some sort of leader and makes him feel good. Editor at some biggish-name Calvinist press (Edinburgh-based Banner of Truth, cough cough, the one whose books he's recently been hugging and expressing his love for online) might do nicely for that.  (although he hasn't tried being an editor yet, so he doesn't know what that's really like ....) 

If "pastor' per se were really a strong goal, I think he'd look a lot more engaged with his plant church and with that pretty exclusively now (we'd see a lot about it on his social media, for example), as it's in its very very early stages of growth, if growth ever occurs. As it is, I see him being engaged with a bunch of different religion-focused activities, preaching at the church, loving those conferences and flitting around to as many as he can get to, and hugging Calvinist books and trying to make an impression on their authors and publishers. Marrying Jingle and inheriting all the Duggar media attention.

To me, it looks like sort of a broad-spectrum approach to the job search. He wants to be a conservative-Christian big shot, so he's doing and saying as many things as he can think of related to that in hopes that one of them will pan out as a path to a job that really makes him feel good. ....

If he doesn't find such a conservative-Christian-themed job that satisfies his ambitions within a decade or so, it wouldn't really surprise me if he started trying for a better career in some other realm entirely. 

I think that everything that Jeremy does is calculated and that includes marrying Jinger. The Duggar media attention may just be the hook that gets him a job, and the Scotland one probably could be done remotely from Laredo. But, then it would be up to Jeremy to prove his capability for it.

Although, then it would be up to him to prove his capability for it.

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, Jellybeans said:

If Jeremy wants to edit Christian books in Scotland, good for him.  It is more ambition than any Duggar SIL.  No snark from me.

How is he qualified for such a job? He does not even have any education in "ministry" either. 

[Sew Sumi]

But... but...but he's written sermons for two whole years! He's eminently qualified to tear apart some well-known theologian's well-researched arguments! /s

[Jellybeans]

19 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

How is he qualified for such a job? He does not even have any education in "ministry" either. 

He has a degree, doesn't he?  And if he is well read, knows how to edit books he can do it.  I knew an editor some years back who had only a high school education. Editing books is a skill devoted readers can do amazingly well.  It is not easy.

You do not have to have education in ministry to be an editor.  An editor works on other people's writings.

Not saying he has those skills, but ministry and editing are two very different fields.

[Chicklet]

I don't know that he has the brains to be an editor: he'd need to have a decent grasp of the English language and just passing acquaintance with Duggars sort of sucks brain cells out of your brain. See Derrick as an example. Dumber by the month.

[DangerousMinds]

Despite all his posing with books, I do not believe that Jeremy is at all "well read."

[Genevrier]

9 hours ago, leighdear said:

So he should really tell people he wants to edit Christian books for handicapped children in Scottish orphanages.  In Spanish. 

Eh. Everyone's doing that this year. ?

[xwordfanatik]

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

Despite all his posing with books, I do not believe that Jeremy is at all "well read."

I'm inclined to believe that, BECAUSE he poses too much.  He tries too hard to look like an intellectual.  I don't doubt he reads, but "well read?"  I guess it's a relative term.  I suppose compared to the Duggars, he is, but that's not saying much.

[Churchhoney]

Well, you have to start somewhere!

At this point, I think any of the job paths he's flirting with may be possibilities for him but will test his determination, work ethic and abilities.

For me the jury is out on how stringent a test of those things he can pass. He may be a lot stronger and more determined than we know right now. ... Or not all that able and determined ..... Or wily enough to get himself some kind of biggish Calvinism-related job by working connections instead of knowing anything! .... Or he might end up deciding to be a high-school soccer coach and teach the accounting class on the side or go into a sales position somewhere. ...

I expect Jer's future is very much a black box at this point. (to him as well as to everybody else)

Edited October 2, 2017 by Churchhoney

[Absolom]

I was kind of expecting him to be angling for a job at the Cali church until they bought the house.  They've made several trips out here since they married.  

[Magoo]

On 9/28/2017 at 5:14 PM, ariel said:

Even as a low level of a player Jeremy was,  I think he had an agent doing the negotiations. 

My friend is married to a former "elite athlete" who almost made it to the olympics. Even at that level, they are coddled and babied and taken care of to the degree they don't know how to do anything for themselves - at least while they are on their way up, and until they are no longer relevant to the sport. This is when it gets interesting. Real life hits, the agents and coaches no longer return the calls, the team of people who made all of the living and travel arrangements vanish and they are left to fend for themselves. No more crowds, no more adoring cheers, no more coddling. It's a giant adjustment that many never truly make. So many of them live in the past and can't move beyond their glory days. My friend's husband has a lot of former teammates who ended up with major drug and alcohol problems, sometimes to the point of death in the most extreme cases, because they had lost their "value," and couldn't adapt to a normal life. In Jeremy's case, he found a way to replace what he had as a professional athlete. He is the so-called head of his church, people look up to him and think he's a star. He married a Duggar girl who not only does the chores of everyday living, but also comes with an enormous team of TLC marketing and publicity who make all of the bigger and more glamorous arrangements. He gets to travel very nicely and with no responsibility to places he never would be able to if not for that PR machine. And most of all, he gets to be on TV and is now more recognizable and famous than he ever dreamed. This guy lives off adoration and recognition because it's all he's known. From small town soccer star to professional soccer player (albeit small-time) to now TV celebrity. He played his cards right and it's worked out for him quite well so far.  Once this particular gravy train ends is when we will see what he is truly made of, I guess. 

Edited October 2, 2017 by Magoo
Missing apostrophe.

[mynextmistake]

On 9/28/2017 at 2:55 PM, Nysha said:

The show would be a whole lot more interesting if Jessa & Ben moved to Laredo and started loosening some of the tight Gothard rules they live by. Who knows, Jessa might be willing to enroll Spurgeon in a Mommy & Me playgroup or even a Christian preschool if she didn't have her sisters available to babysit.

I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to hear that Jessa's newfound clinginess is based on major jealousy. Look at her life and compare it to Jinger's. She's stuck in Duggarville with two kids, no education, no job and a husband who's barely out of his teens. She lives in a Duggar house and has her family up in her grill all the damn time. She's still wearing flip-flops and ankle-length denim skirts from the thrift store. All she has to look forward to is popping out a new blessing every year (and who knows how she really feels about that?) and riding the gravy train until it derails and she's stuck with thirteen kids and no means of supporting them.

Jinger got to move thousands of miles away to Laredo, where she and her husband purchased their own home. She only has to see family occasionally when they come to visit or she goes back to AR. Her town has not only a Wal-Mart but a Target, a Macy's, a Marshall's and a number of other clothing stores where she can buy (gasp!) new clothing. Including pants and real shoes, which she is then "allowed" to wear in public. She's traveled to various fun places and seems to actually enjoy spending time with her spouse. She's been married eleven months and there are no blessings in sight, which strongly suggests that she and Jeremy are planning their family. And honestly, I get that some people think Jeremy is controlling, but I think if Jinger went to him and said she wanted to study nursing or something at the community college, he would be supportive. 

If I were Jessa, I'd be pretty envious and probably feel left behind. Jinger is growing up. Jessa will probably never get the chance to do that.

[Marigold]

I believe Jim Bob handles everything related to TLC and money. 

This is not a popular opinion but you gotta admit, Jim Bob is teflon. He has managed to finagle, wiggle and weasel his way to keeping the show on for years...even after Josh.  

 

Jeremy likes the TV fame and probably does not want to rock the boat with Jim Bob. 

[Scarlett45]

@mynextmistake if Jessa is jealous (I most certainly think she is), then she should do something to change her life. She and Ben can use contraceptives for a few years if they aren't done having children; Ben could get a real job so he's not under JB's thumb. They do have a house to live in and no debt, only two kids. Yes Ben is young (that's not his fault), but I don't think he's a dipshit like Derrick. If Jessa wanted to make changes for them to be more independent he would agree. Also TLC would love it! 

 

For YEARS Jinger wanted to be free, and found a guy that went along with her game plan who she was actually into. Jessa has no one to blame being "stuck" besides herself when she sees how her little sister has made a life for herself. 

[Churchhoney]

6 hours ago, mynextmistake said:

 

If I were Jessa, I'd be pretty envious and probably feel left behind. Jinger is growing up. Jessa will probably never get the chance to do that.

I agree with everything you say about Jessa's probably being envious now. When it comes to getting the chance to grow up, though, seems to me it isn't so much that she'll never get the chance as that she'll never take the chance, really.

If she really wanted to do something different, all she'd have to do is move 100 to 150 miles away and start living a different life. Surely they have a bit of savings by now, with the tv money, so they could move to some bigger town, Bin could get a modest job of some kind (there are toilets to clean everywhere, if nothing else presents itself right at first), they could start using birth control, and they could hang on for a couple of years until both kids are old enough for preschool. In the meanwhile, Jessa could take some cheap online courses in Excel and other workplace skills to get more job-market-ready. And eventually she could get a part-time job, too. Eventually they could have everything JIngle has. 

But it seems that,even if she is envious of another more normal and freeing life, Jessa, like the rest of her siblings, is either too timid or too lazy (both?) to actually try to get such a life. More of the tragedy of the Duggars, to me. All the Parents of the Year have actually fostered in their kids is the fearful parts. So if the kids are going to feel envious of other lives, it seems as if they're always just going to have to be envious, because none of seems to have the nerve to actually do something different. I mean, look at Jill. She got the chance to live what she'd always thought was her dream and it turned her into a blathering basket case. And if Jessa actually is eaten up with jealousy over Jingle's escape, then she's in a pretty similar condition to Jill's, I think, since she must think she's powerless to do anything about it, when that isn't true. 

And I think it's likely that this frozen state will be permanent for these older ones. Because the older most people get the bigger ruts they dig themselves into, usually. I'd love to see Jessa or any of them make a move to get a life they choose in some way. But with this older group, at least, it seems that, except for Jingle maybe getting it because Jer wants it, it's just not going to happen. They're too fearful and stunted to envision lives of their own, looks like. Horrible upbringing that can do that to such a passel of kids. 

Edited October 2, 2017 by Churchhoney

[flyingdi]

For some reason, and I can't really explain it, I don't think Jinger was ever the lap dog everyone thinks she was.  Yes I think she was Jessa's friend and cohort but I think Jinger ultimately always does what she wants to.

[Jynnan tonnix]

7 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

I agree with everything you say about Jessa's probably being envious now. When it comes to getting the chance to grow up, though, seems to me it isn't so much that she'll never get the chance as that she'll never take the chance, really.

If she really wanted to do something different, all she'd have to do is move 100 to 150 miles away and start living a different life. Surely they have a bit of savings by now, with the tv money, so they could move to some bigger town, Bin could get a modest job of some kind (there are toilets to clean everywhere, if nothing else presents itself right at first), they could start using birth control, and they could hang on for a couple of years until both kids are old enough for preschool. In the meanwhile, Jessa could take some cheap online courses in Excel and other workplace skills to get more job-market-ready. And eventually she could get a part-time job, too. Eventually they could have everything JIngle has. 

But it seems that,even if she is envious of another more normal and freeing life, Jessa, like the rest of her siblings, is either too timid or too lazy (both?) to actually try to get such a life. More of the tragedy of the Duggars, to me. All the Parents of the Year have actually fostered in their kids is the fearful parts. So if the kids are going to feel envious of other lives, it seems as if they're always just going to have to be envious, because none of seems to have the nerve to actually do something different. I mean, look at Jill. She got the chance to live what she'd always thought was her dream and it turned her into a blathering basket case. And if Jessa actually is eaten up with jealousy over Jingle's escape, then she's in a pretty similar condition to Jill's, I think, since she must think she's powerless to do anything about it, when that isn't true. 

And I think it's likely that this frozen state will be permanent for these older ones. Because the older most people get the bigger ruts they dig themselves into, usually. I'd love to see Jessa or any of them make a move to get a life they choose in some way. But with this older group, at least, it seems that, except for Jingle maybe getting it because Jer wants it, it's just not going to happen. They're too fearful and stunted to envision lives of their own, looks like. Horrible upbringing that can do that to such a passel of kids. 

And at the same time, it's probably been drilled into their heads all their lives that they are superior to those people they find themselves envying, which has to play games with your mind in a major way!

[Churchhoney]

43 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

And at the same time, it's probably been drilled into their heads all their lives that they are superior to those people they find themselves envying, which has to play games with your mind in a major way!

Boy, you sure are right about that. .... Nothing like control-freak cultists to master the art of putting people into double, triple, quadruple binds. I expect that various kinds of confusion are one of the big forces keeping the Duggar kids so locked in. ... That and TLC cash, of course. lol

[Marigold]

Anyone who breaks out of any religious stronghold group is always immediately felt sorry for. And prayed for.  Because they are very lost and confused. 

I can't tell how deep Jessa's beliefs are.  They might be just a "thing she does" or she really truly believes everything pertaining to her religion.  But if jessa is truly sincere in believing that women shouldn't wear pants, I can guarantee that Jessa feels bad that Jinger is doing something sinful and has been praying for her. Might even feel angry that Jeremy led her baby sister into a such a unbiblical doctrine. 

[lascuba]

9 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Anyone who breaks out of any religious stronghold group is always immediately felt sorry for. And prayed for.  Because they are very lost and confused. 

I can't tell how deep Jessa's beliefs are.  They might be just a "thing she does" or she really truly believes everything pertaining to her religion.  But if jessa is truly sincere in believing that women shouldn't wear pants, I can guarantee that Jessa feels bad that Jinger is doing something sinful and has been praying for her. Might even feel angry that Jeremy led her baby sister into a such a unbiblical doctrine. 

I think it's more of a "thing she does" coupled with intense love/loyalty for her mother, specifically, and family name in general, plus just not being comfortable with outsider speculation. Because just thinking back to old episodes, the way she talks about Michelle...she really does love her mom. I can't recall specific examples now, but it always struck me how sincere she looked when talking about how great her mom is. She loves JB, but she also recognizes that he's a buffoon and makes that obvious, but it's always kid gloves with Michelle. Whether it's because Michelle is as emotionally fragile as some think, or she's the controlling brains behind it all, Jessa won't ever branch out too much (unless she can conveniently use Ben as an excuse, like the rap thing) in deference to her. I think one reason she and Jinger are so close is because they both bonded over the vapid stupidity of their family's public image.  Jinger is both more outgoing and laid back, so she can let talk and questions roll off her back while goes ahead and wears pants because she wants to and Jeremy is cool with it. While Jessa is probably fine with pants wearing  and whatever else, she doesn't want to be questioned about why she changed her mind and she doesn't want to risk upsetting Michelle, so she continues with the public image of Duggardom because she doesn't mind wearing skirts all the time. 

I do think she believes the  major fire and brimstone stuff but not all that into the minutiae of pants-wearing, etc.

[PikaScrewChu]

1 hour ago, flyingdi said:

For some reason, and I can't really explain it, I don't think Jinger was ever the lap dog everyone thinks she was.  Yes I think she was Jessa's friend and cohort but I think Jinger ultimately always does what she wants to.

I've said this before and I'll say it again. Jinger would have married Satan himself if it meant getting off and away from the compound. I don't think she envies her sisters' lives one bit and I do believe the Vuolos not having children yet is a joint decision by Jeremy and Jinger. I do not think it's a unilateral decision by Jeremy.

[queenanne]

14 minutes ago, PikaScrewChu said:

I've said this before and I'll say it again. Jinger would have married Satan himself if it meant getting off and away from the compound. I don't think she envies her sisters' lives one bit and I do believe the Vuolos not having children yet is a joint decision by Jeremy and Jinger. I do not think it's a unilateral decision by Jeremy.

Which in turn begs the question:  what could Jessa’s motivation for getting married could have been?  Seems unlikely she would have equated having kids with being grownup... she’s taken care of kids all her life.  It doesn’t seem likely she thought Bin would take her away from all this... and she can’t be that anxious to be away from her family, as she’s in their laps all the time.  I thought she was purported to be the shrewd one.  What did she gain?

Edited October 2, 2017 by queenanne

[Lunera]

Jessa is both happy and envious of Jinger, she has the life Jessa wanted. Jessa also has the hots for Jeremy and has realized Bin is nothing special and there were better candidates out there all along. She rushed into marriage because she wanted to leave the compound not necessarily because she was horny. I think she was infatuated with Bin because he was young and cute, I honestly don't believe she loved him. They are both content with life and 2 kids but she'll have a breakdown once the 3rd kid arrives, while Jinger is still living it up in Laredo child free. Just my opinion....

Edited October 2, 2017 by Lunera

[flyingdi]

16 minutes ago, queenanne said:

Which in turn begs the question:  what could Jessa’s motivation for getting married could have been?  Seems unlikely she would have equated having kids with being grownup... she’s taken care of kids all her life.  It doesn’t seem likely she thought Bin would take her away from all this... and she can’t be that anxious to be away from her family, as she’s in their laps all the time.  I thought she was purported to be the shrewd one.  What did she gain?

She gained a certain minute amount of freedom.  Jessa's in her families lap all the time cause she wants to be not because she has to.  She also gained a nice Christian husband who actually likes his kids and is not too pressing of the whole headship thing.  She gained a small sense of self control.

What will be most interesting to me will be to see what happens after the show, especially to Jessa.  Jessa likes the attention her family brings.  After the show she may get sick of her extended family quickly.

Edited October 2, 2017 by flyingdi
Jessa is not a Scottish lake monster!

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

1 hour ago, queenanne said:

Which in turn begs the question:  what could Jessa’s motivation for getting married could have been?  Seems unlikely she would have equated having kids with being grownup... she’s taken care of kids all her life.  It doesn’t seem likely she thought Bin would take her away from all this... and she can’t be that anxious to be away from her family, as she’s in their laps all the time.  I thought she was purported to be the shrewd one.  What did she gain?

Sex with a (compared to 99.9% of Fundie guys) hot guy, her own social media, and her own space (bedroom, bed, closet, etc). 

[lascuba]

1 hour ago, queenanne said:

Which in turn begs the question:  what could Jessa’s motivation for getting married could have been?  Seems unlikely she would have equated having kids with being grownup... she’s taken care of kids all her life.  It doesn’t seem likely she thought Bin would take her away from all this... and she can’t be that anxious to be away from her family, as she’s in their laps all the time.  I thought she was purported to be the shrewd one.  What did she gain?

She gained what she wanted...out of the house but close to familiar surroundings, with a husband who's not, apparently, a controlling asshole. She got married long before the scandals came out, so she was operating under the assumption that she'd have a lot more financial independence. I don't think she's particularly envious of Jinger except for the disposable income, assuming Jeremy actually has much of that (and I have my doubts, house notwithstanding). She might be jealous because Jinger is pulling away from her, but I don't think she wants the life that Jinger has. Jessa could very well be rethinking her choices, but if she is I think it's more to do with the general relationship consequences of a)marrying before she really knew herself and what she wanted, b)marrying someone she hadn't spent any time alone with, c)marrying someone so with such a completely different personality that hers. It's one thing to find a partner who balances you, it's another to marry someone with such incompatible ideas of love and romance and marriage. Because I'm SURE that once they were married for a while, Jessa stopped acting properly, submissively appreciative over Ben's infantile declarations. And Ben was way too enamored of Jessa and Duggardom when he married. You shouldn't marry a person you put on a pedestal...you'll eventually be disappointed when that person turns out to be human, and it's just plain unfair.

[BckpckFullaNinjas]

3 hours ago, lascuba said:

intense love/loyalty for her mother, specifically, and family name in general, plus just not being comfortable with outsider speculation. Because just thinking back to old episodes, the way she talks about Michelle...she really does love her mom.

Where this would make me happy in the context of almost any ther family, it makes me narrow my eyes and think that Meechelle bought Jessa’s love with blatant favoritism — thinking for instance how Jessa pestered Jana without rest (in the way of younger siblings), and instead of being corrected for her sin, wound up with a treasure of Jana’s AND never saw negative consequences because Meech and JimB stopped copulating long enough to tell a frustrated Jana to buy her sister’s mercy. 

[lascuba]

2 minutes ago, BckpckFullaNinjas said:

Where this would make me happy in the context of almost any ther family, it makes me narrow my eyes and think that Meechelle bought Jessa’s love with blatant favoritism — thinking for instance how Jessa pestered Jana without rest (in the way of younger siblings), and instead of being corrected for her sin, wound up with a treasure of Jana’s AND never saw negative consequences because Meech and JimB stopped copulating long enough to tell a frustrated Jana to buy her sister’s mercy. 

I don't think Michelle has it in her to favor anyone except Josie. And the way she's always talked about her older kids' younger years, it's clear Jessa wasn't a favorite. "I thought Jessa was deaf but she just wouldn't listen!" is code for "I had to beat the shit out of her on a daily basis because she acted like a normal toddler."

The jewelry box incident (in which Jessa, I have to point out, was three) was lazy parenting. In a radio interview once--before the scandals--Josh (so take with a grain of salt) said that growing up, their parents expected the kids to deal with issues themselves and didn't want to hear tattling over childish arguments. If Jessa had been doing something to annoy Michelle, she would have been disciplined severely, but because it was a sibling, she went for the easiest path...give the toddler something to shut her up so the older kid would stop annoying her with complaints.

[Churchhoney]

1 hour ago, lascuba said:

I don't think Michelle has it in her to favor anyone except Josie. And the way she's always talked about her older kids' younger years, it's clear Jessa wasn't a favorite. "I thought Jessa was deaf but she just wouldn't listen!" is code for "I had to beat the shit out of her on a daily basis because she acted like a normal toddler."

The jewelry box incident (in which Jessa, I have to point out, was three) was lazy parenting. In a radio interview once--before the scandals--Josh (so take with a grain of salt) said that growing up, their parents expected the kids to deal with issues themselves and didn't want to hear tattling over childish arguments. If Jessa had been doing something to annoy Michelle, she would have been disciplined severely, but because it was a sibling, she went for the easiest path...give the toddler something to shut her up so the older kid would stop annoying her with complaints.

Multiple Mother-of-the-Year Award Winner!!!!

[Marigold]

Totally agree that Jinger and Jessa were one of the few kids aware of how dopey the Duggars were/are.  Jinger and Jessa are not geniuses but I do think their IQ is higher than the other Duggs.  They get it.  They knew their swimsuits were wacky. They knew that people cracked up at their skirts.  They knew that having 19 kids was really odd. They knew the courting and no kiss stuff was extreme.    Doens't mean they don't believe in it but they were always aware of their wackiness.  Sometimes we even caught them eye rolling and sometimes even downright embarrassed. 

[Lunera]

9 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Totally agree that Jinger and Jessa were one of the few kids aware of how dopey the Duggars were/are.  Jinger and Jessa are not geniuses but I do think their IQ is higher than the other Duggs.  They get it.  They knew their swimsuits were wacky. They knew that people cracked up at their skirts.  They knew that having 19 kids was really odd. They knew the courting and no kiss stuff was extreme.    Doens't mean they don't believe in it but they were always aware of their wackiness.  Sometimes we even caught them eye rolling and sometimes even downright embarrassed. 

I remember an episode of 18 kids where the producers asked Jessa what would she say to people who said that her parents shelter them too much and she said "get over it" in an annoyed tone. She was around 14/15 and she didn't try to keep sweet or say because they love us or because they want us to remain godly. She knew it was all bullshit and went along with it. 

[ariel]

On ‎10‎/‎1‎/‎2017 at 6:03 PM, Jellybeans said:

He has a degree, doesn't he?  And if he is well read, knows how to edit books he can do it.  I knew an editor some years back who had only a high school education. 

A person with only a high school education being successful at editing is rare in this day & age.

[Spencer Hastings]

The world is strange these days.  Very rarely do people actually work on the field they graduated in, save for very specialized areas. Jeremy could be an editor if he had a real knack for the English language, no matter what his degree is in. I know philosophy majors who are now working at big marketing companies.  A major means less and less as the years go by.