Season 5 Discussion

[OnceSane]

Quote

Reza reveals to Asa that he's finally ready to marry Adam; Mike tells Jessica he's finally ready to reconnect with his old friends; when the group comes together at Shervin's 35th birthday party, a troubled GG threatens to ruin the celebration.

[JoJoPowerRanger]

Just checked my DVR to find the "First Look" of this ep of Shahs and ran here to give my first thoughts since I couldn't contain my excitement /s

 

I like MJ's new boyfriend! He seems like he's a super bro and probably tells gross jokes but I get the impression that he busts MJ's balls, which may be what she needed in a partner.

 

I've disliked Jessica for a couple of seasons now, but man oh man do I pity her. I totally believe she cared more about being a "wife" than being married to the right person, but I admire her level of commitment--she converted to Judaism and seems pretty dedicated to becoming fluent in Farsi. I love seeing people embrace their significant others' cultures and it's too bad she did it for a cheating douchebag.  Other than my pity and embarrassment for her, she does hold a negligible space in my heart for teaching me what "fake the funk" means. 

 

I think I forgot to mention that I hate all these people and I'm still going to watch this whole season because I'm ridiculous.

[EverybodyIsACritic]

I just watched the "First Look" for the new episode, and I can't wait for Sunday!

MJ's new man is...uhhh.... not what I expected. He popped a woody in his basketball shorts when he saw her step out of her Uber on their first date. At least 3 things are wrong with that situation. Her clothes racks and acres of shoes mesmerize me.

Reza and Adam are just right together. The discussion about their sex life, complete with Reza acting out Adam's part was hilarious. I'm glad to see they are reinvesting in each other.

Mike and shiksa Barbie have me confused. I thought they split?

Asa annoys the shit out of me. Persian Pop Princess, my flat Irish ass.

I must confess a soft spot for GG. She seems almost feral at times, not unlike one of my cats. He's gorgeous, but he'll cut a bitch, just like GG.

[Neurochick]

How long before Jessica's nasty face gets off my TV?

[ExplainItAgain]

I'm glad Reza and Adam patched things up. I like the calming effect that Adam has on Reza. Oh shit...Bobby and Asifa are STILL TOGETHER?!

 

I kind of like MJ's boyfriend! I don't know why, but he just seems likable. I bet he will prove me wrong over the course of the season.

 

Ugh, Jessica. I did not miss her. Mike HATES being married. Not shocked at all that this relationship went south.

 

I see GG hasn't changed. I'm not familiar with RA, but if your health is not the best, wouldn't you quit drinking and smoking?? Also, Asa's ass is Kardashian-level serious.

[Watermelon]

Asa's ass is amazing, and I'm pretty sure it's natural and what all these fake booty broads should be aiming for.

 

You don't get a huge ass with skinny thighs, folks.  Don't be afraid of thick thighs.

[MrsRafaelBarba]

All that money spent, Jessica and Midget Mike didn't last a year.

[HunterHunted]

I always find it so interesting that Reza and MJ behave so terribly at other people's events, but would probably go ape shit if folks started to toss cake around at their parties.

I like MJ's boyfriend. His bro-iness seems to be a good counter for her ridiculousness. Plus he seems to be ride or die for her when it comes to Vida, who is Echidna the mother of monsters. I have no doubt that Vida would literally smother MJ and swallow her whole if she could.

Asa's caftan business is the biggest duh business idea ever. I don't know why we had to put up with her spiritual diamond blessed water when she's been walking around with caftans and turbans from jump.

On another note, I love Jonathan Adler. If I could afford more of his stuff, my house would probably look like Reza's maximalist mess.

Edited April 11, 2016 by HunterHunted

[Sun-Bun]

Asa's ass is amazing, and I'm pretty sure it's natural and what all these fake booty broads should be aiming for.

You don't get a huge ass with skinny thighs, folks. Don't be afraid of thick thighs.

Amen to that!!!

I'm not a fan of her body-type myself((a little too bootilicious/fertility goddessy for my preference)), but I *do* adore her body confidence and how tastefully she displays her curves. I wish more women embraced their curves and enhanced their figures with flattering outfits the way she does so effortlessly.

Love her kaftans too---makes me wonder if the kaftan queen Patricia of "Southern Charm" has had a chance to order an Asa special frock yet??

Reza seems so happy and relaxed so far, less bitchy and drunk---his new hubby has apparently been a very nice influence on him. LOVED his hilarious spin on a "Tropez" outfit!

Nice to see MJ so happy with a nice new guy too! I hate that her evil bitch of a mom will apparently shit all over her happiness soon enough, as usual.

GG is still a hideous mess, ditto the boring chick Asifa from last season with her pathetic excuse of a relationship.

I love Shervin and am soooo glad they finally cast someone worthwhile to hang with this group after the endless revolving cast of new group members. Hopefully this guy will stick around, because he's actually cute, funny and likable. And had seemingly endless amounts of money that I'm still not even sure how he ever earned.

Edited April 11, 2016 by Sun-Bun

[charmed1]

It amazes me how disrespectful Reza is to Adam and Adam still married his sorry ass.

[selhars]

I've never seem so many needy people in my life….Mike, Jessica, Adam, Reza, MJ….Asifa, Bobby.

Asa and Shervin are the only ones who seem to have a REAL sense of who they are.

Two out of nine people…yikes, not good. Are traits like self-awareness and maturity THAT rare???

Edited April 11, 2016 by selhars

[biakbiak]

OMG, Mike and Jessica video was over the top ridiculous, add in the fact that they are already getting a divorce and I cackled! I am not a nice person.

Also, Reza's hair needs a thread of its own!

Edited April 11, 2016 by biakbiak

[TexasGal]

I don't understand why people would keep inviting GG anywhere. Even when she's being "nice" she's still bitchy.

[bichonblitz]

I thought Sherv was going to say he was 40. He tries too hard. He seems like the nicest and best looking guy of the bunch, though.  Is he gay or not? Why is GiGi's cousin latched on to him? 

 

MJ, really can't she do better.  Can't she find herself a nice, rich Persian man like her mama wants her to? Her BF looks like a low class moron. Doesn't know or can't pronounce bequeath?  

 

Why do I feel sorry for GiGi? Rhumatoid Arthritis is a bitch. My neighbor has it and is in pain all the time. Some days she can't even get out of bed she hurts so much. GiGi said she stays home alot and doesn't go out much anymore. I actually believe her. Getting shitfaced drunk won't solve anything but her illness is alot to deal with. 

 

I can't stand Mike or Reza. 

[Ubiquitous]

I started to watch but quit when I remembered how much I dislike these people.

[bichonblitz]

Asa with the Caftans. What happened to Diamond Water?  Let's stop playing, Asa. Where does she really get her money?  

 

Why wasn't MJ's new man and Reza's Adam invited to the party? 

 

One more thought: I was really hoping Adam dumped Reza. Reza is an asshole, the sex will never be good enough for him, he gets bored too easily,  and he treats Adam like shit. What the hell is wrong with Adam that he would let himself be treated like that? Even Reza was surprised that he took him back.  This will be another relationship just like Mike and Jessica, headed for divorce because you just know Reza will cheat soon enough. 

Edited April 11, 2016 by bichonblitz

[Neurochick]

Why are Adam and Reza even still together?

 

I wonder what happened to Asa's "Diamond Water?"

 

Ugh, Asifa, she's still around.

 

I bet Jessica and Mike's wedding wasn't THAT expensive, even if you're a G list celebrity, if the wedding was featured in some magazine a lot of vendors might offer a discount. 

 

I really don't fret over how anybody makes their money.  I live in NYC and plenty of people 35 and under make a mint in finance and then get 7 figure bonuses, it's amazing, and that's why the rents are so high in Manhattan. 

[Silo]

What I don't understand is that Jessica said to Gigi on Shahs last night that anything that happened before she and Mike got married doesn't count. Didn't she discover after they got married that he cheated before they got married? Why all of a sudden does it count now?

[Fuzzysox]

How long before Jessica's nasty face gets off my TV?

Sorry to have to tell you but she will be around for a while because she can always be cast as JLo's double. Jessica has transformed her face into JLo's. She would be perfect if they ever make a JLo biopic.

[biakbiak]

Oh I forgot about MJs complete lack of fashion sense! I thought the white dress she put on at Asa was one of her better fashion choices, admittedly a very, very low bar, and then she changed into the other completely unflattering look that need to be cut with dull scissors in the back of a car! Why, MJ, WHY?!?

Edited April 11, 2016 by biakbiak

[Tallulahbaby]

My husband commentEd on the Bentley Mike and Jessica were driving, then their tiny home with the same rug from Target, like us.

Asa's body is sick. Love it.

Sorry to have to tell you but she will be around for a while because she can always be cast as JLo's double. Jessica has transformed her face into JLo's. She would be perfect if they ever make a JLo biopic.

Well, if casting for a JLo biopic for the visually impaired, then yes. Because unless you squint and look at her in the dark with sunglasses on, then I can see a resemblance. ;-)

[OnceSane]

Asa ditches potential Persian pop priestess status to hawk caftans. Glad she came back to earth.

I like MJ's snarky boyfriend, I think his humor (& ability to brush off her wire hanger mom) is what she needs.

Asifa is already working hard for season 6, guess the producers told her the Bobby & Asifa drama wasn't enough.

GG needs professional help, but will never get it--or never take it seriously if she does.

Jessica should have stopped fucking with her face about a dozen Botox treatments ago.

[imjagain]

My husband commentEd on the Bentley Mike and Jessica were driving, then their tiny home with the same rug from Target, like us.

Asa's body is sick. Love it.

Well, if casting for a JLo biopic for the visually impaired, then yes. Because unless you squint and look at her in the dark with sunglasses on, then I can see a resemblance. ;-)

Right. I know some dislike JLo but the woman is stunning, Jessica wishes she looked like JLo.

[Silo]

It's her eyes. Every time I see her, they are farther and farther apart. Soon she's going to be like one of those fish whose eyes are so far apart they blink independently.

[nexxie]

So sickening the way these self-absorbed idiots trashed the boat by throwing cake filled with red dye. Please, tell me the red was from some washable food-based coloring!

[sleekandchic]

It amazes me how disrespectful Reza is to Adam and Adam still married his sorry ass.

I know. Actually, I don't know how ANYONE can tolerate Reza.

I've never seem so many needy people in my life….Mike, Jessica, Adam, Reza, MJ….Asifa, Bobby.

Asa and Shervin are the only ones who seem to have a REAL sense of who they are.

Two out of nine people…yikes, not good. Are traits like self-awareness and maturity THAT rare???

Needy, hateful, ignorant, no redeeming qualities. The phoniness is off the charts..

OMG, Mike and Jessica video was over the top ridiculous, add in the fact that they are already getting a divorce and I cackled! I am not a nice person.

Also, Reza's hair needs a thread of its own!

What the hell was with Rezas hair do on the boat? it looked like a bad toupee having a sleep atop his head!!

Oh Asifa, how i threw up a little when i saw you, WTF is Bobby still doing with you?

Sherv is way too cute and down to earth, sensible and NORMAL to be on this show with these train wrecks. And how exactly did he attain such wealth at 35? Crazy!

GG...no words. Seasons later you still act the same way. Surely seeing yourself on tv for four seasons would show you YOU NEED HELP girl, alas, she is still...i hate this saying, but white trash, and she aint even white. Oh dear.

But i love this show, i must say, the trainwreck as it is!

Reza was rockin the Kim Jong Un hair and squat fireplug look! Reza is blissfully clueless of his own ugliness, inside and out.

His constant use of "bitches" toward his women "friends" is not cool, hip, trendy or au courant. It's just VILE. And yeah, I have a healthy sense of humor. He is not funny or cute.

GG is mentally ill which is greatly exacerbated by her substance abuse. Thoroughly deplorable in every way, and, still, she's coddled. Her cunning and unadulterated envy scare me.

I started to watch but quit when I remembered how much I dislike these people.

They are truly AWFUL.

Oh I forgot about MJs complete lack of fashion sense! I thought the white dress she put on at Asa was one of her better fashion choices, admittedly a very, very low bar, and then she changed into the other completely unflattering look that need to be cut with dull scissors in the back of a car! Why, MJ, WHY?!?

MJ looked like a beached whale. And blonde hair? Not flattering to her complexion. Plus it's brassy blonde.

My husband commentEd on the Bentley Mike and Jessica were driving, then their tiny home with the same rug from Target, like us.

Asa's body is sick. Love it.

Well, if casting for a JLo biopic for the visually impaired, then yes. Because unless you squint and look at her in the dark with sunglasses on, then I can see a resemblance. ;-)

Beauty will always be in the eye of the beholder, and I respect all opinions. To me, Asa looks like an NFL linebacker, strangled and choking on Spanx three sizes too small. Her circulation must be suffering.

Who were all the people below deck on the birthday yacht?

GG needs professional help, but will never get it--or never take it seriously if she does.

Oh yeah. She's brutal. Edited April 12, 2016 by sleekandchic

[yourmomiseasy]

Sherv is way too cute and down to earth, sensible and NORMAL to be on this show with these train wrecks. And how exactly did he attain such wealth at 35? Crazy!

 

When he was introduced as someone buying a house from MJ it was said that he made his money in tech in SF.  I assume he sold a startup, maybe more than one.  My colleague's former intern hasn't even hit 30 yet and the startup he founded is valued in the billions.  SF is kind of like the late 90s again. 

[hatchetgirl]

I have RA and with the meds cannot drink. The metabolize in the liver so drinking is a big no no. The meds also depress your immune system, so sick all the time. It's a huge bitch. Add in daily pain and it's all. My feet knuckles just all the time. My Achilles tendon is constantly swollen. All this and I've not had a flare up in about 6 mos and just been cleared for exercising again. GG, must not take any meds except pain meds and alcohol. I get the whole "this is my life from now on." I hate taking meds, getting constant blood tests, being in pain all the time, but such is life. I want to be 100 someday! Lol

[Neurochick]

So sickening the way these self-absorbed idiots trashed the boat by throwing cake filled with red dye. Please, tell me the red was from some washable food-based coloring!

 

I thought it was a red velvet cake.  

[Ubiquitous]

Did Reza really think it would be funny to dress up like a sheik for the "white party"? I thought those parties went out of style with "pimps and whores" theme parties.

 

Who were all the people below deck on the birthday yacht?

I assume they were the people who didn't want to be seen on TV with these people and associated with them.

[bichonblitz]

So sickening the way these self-absorbed idiots trashed the boat by throwing cake filled with red dye. Please, tell me the red was from some washable food-based coloring!

That made me sick,too! When are these assholes gonna grow up? They're just not funny anymore, they are all too old to pull it off. I hope the entire season is not going to be this type of bullshit.

I watched the episode again, and it was Reza that started throwing the cake! That gorgeous yacht, and these low class idiots have to act like animals. If I was Shervin, after spending all that money on his own nice birthday party, I would be so effin' pissed!

As far as drinking is concerned, it's not just GiGi with the problem. Wasn't MJ called out on her sloppiness a few seasons before?  With her,It wasn't just drinking , it was pills, too. And wasn't it Reza that made a huge deal about it at a reunion?  Mike and Reza drink way too much,  also. 

[Silo]

ahhhhh yes, MJ's boyfriend, found on tinder no less, replete with a boner - in basketball shorts - on their first meeting. Sweet jesus, is that for real? Is that the best she can do? He is awful. Not that she is not , but come on. Can't wait to see her crazy ass mother take him down at the lunch they previewed!

God i LOVE these forums, being able to vent with like-minded people about these NON like minded people!!!!

Oh - Mike on their hike when he was doing his TH about Jessica "work late? ask permission. Go out with the boys? ask permission. etc.....ad nauseaum. jesus dude, who wants a marriage or relationship like that? ASK PERMISSION!????

Nope.

#doomed

controlling bitch!

Maybe she made him asked permission because she knew deep down he was cheating on her.

[Baltimore Betty]

I looked at the photo of MJ flashing her ring, two things came to mind, one it looks fake and the other...I thought I heard the guy say that if he had the money a ring would be on her finger.  That is a big ugly fake looking ring and if it is real it would have cost more than a house so how does one go from not having enough for a ring to THAT sort of ring?

[nexxie]

I thought it was a red velvet cake.

That's what I thought too - if they used typical food coloring for the red they're screwed, but some bakers use berries or beets for coloring and it might be possible to get that out.

[halkatla]

Watching Jessica and Mike is so uncomfortable, but they´re also unlikable so I´m not that sorry for them. A really stupid observation/thought I had was that they don´t look like a good match. Unlike MJ and her new man, they match in strange way. What I´m trying to say is that Asa and Mike would not look right together as a couple either, it would be weird.

[EverybodyIsACritic]

I have RA and with the meds cannot drink. The metabolize in the liver so drinking is a big no no. The meds also depress your immune system, so sick all the time. It's a huge bitch. Add in daily pain and it's all. My feet knuckles just all the time. My Achilles tendon is constantly swollen. All this and I've not had a flare up in about 6 mos and just been cleared for exercising again. GG, must not take any meds except pain meds and alcohol. I get the whole "this is my life from now on." I hate taking meds, getting constant blood tests, being in pain all the time, but such is life. I want to be 100 someday! Lol

I have RA as well, and all I get is anti-inflammatory meds and a needle once a week! But to be fair to GG, I'm not even close to having any kind of surgeries on my joints. I've had to give up my high heels and rings, and all but a few cocktails here and there. Totally agree with hating it, but it is what it is.

[thefog]

They need to lose this loser cast.  Keep Shervin and start fresh.  Are he and Omni more than friends.

Edited April 13, 2016 by escape

[hatchetgirl]

 

I have RA as well, and all I get is anti-inflammatory meds and a needle once a week! But to be fair to GG, I'm not even close to having any kind of surgeries on my joints. I've had to give up my high heels and rings, and all but a few cocktails here and there. Totally agree with hating it, but it is what it is.

 

With the amount of alcohol she drinks though, I wonder if she even takes any meds for the RA, which could explain the surgeries.  

[Giselle]

Asa's ass is amazing, and I'm pretty sure it's natural and what all these fake booty broads should be aiming for.

 

You don't get a huge ass with skinny thighs, folks.  Don't be afraid of thick thighs.

 

My boyfriend would agree with you. I have pointed out Asa's backside plenty of times and said "Enjoy!"  Guys are always gonna look even when they are 90.

Asa ditches potential Persian pop priestess status to hawk caftans. Glad she came back to earth.

 

The Intergalactic Persian Pop Priestess is only on hiatus until she makes some coin. She's not giving that shit up.

[EverybodyIsACritic]

With the amount of alcohol she drinks though, I wonder if she even takes any meds for the RA, which could explain the surgeries.

Good point! I mean what's a few knuckles between friends like Jim, Jack, and George?

[OnceSane]

Reza encounters opposition when he announces his plans for a surprise wedding; Jessica tells Mike what she expects from married life; Asa struggles with her family business; MJ prepares to introduce the new man in her life to her mother, Vida.

[hatchetgirl]

Lol. My doc will only let me have 1 glass of wine a week. Can you imagine my blood test if I was totally off the rails? Dang, her liver should be dead my now.

Edited April 14, 2016 by hatchetgirl

[Giselle]

God I love Shervin. I know he must have his faults but I hope that as we learn of them they are something minor or that he can overcome. In general as someone said up stream, I like his positive attitude and Asa's for that matter. It's refreshing. Asa's priestess thing is too much but at least it is coming from a positive place.

 

It's too bad that Jessica and GG were interrupted I wish they would have told Asa and Reza to go away or moved to another area of the boat to talk. It would have been nice if they could come to some sort of truce agreement. a la agree to disagree and if you can't be for me just don't be against me.

 

Reza and MJ are pigs around alcohol, GG just gets mean and all get belligerent. I felt bad for Shervin.

 

What I do admire that it is a tight group of friends. Sure they fight and are very hypocritical but they do care about each other.

 

Bring on the food!

[Bronzedog]

Unfortunately, GG is the type of person who may be found dead one of these days. She's probably depressed and mixing prescription drugs and alcohol.

[Petunia13]

MJ's new man is...uhhh.... not what I expected. He popped a woody in his basketball shorts when he saw her step out of her Uber on their first date. At least 3 things are wrong with that situation.

Allow me. 1. She had to take an Uber to meet him rather than he picking her up. 2. He was wearing basketball shorts. 3. That he had a hard on as a first impression.

[Giselle]

Unfortunately, GG is the type of person who may be found dead one of these days. She's probably depressed and mixing prescription drugs and alcohol.

 

Either that or she will start in and escalate with the wrong person and they will finish it. The girl has mental and physical issues.

 

Why is Asifa and Bobby still on my screen. Nobody lies them and all she does is bitch and fight... with everybody!

Edited April 16, 2016 by Giselle

[tenativelyyours]

I can't help but give Shervin a huge and continuing helping of side-eye.  Either he actually likes hanging with these people or does it for camera and even possibly money (none of these asshats seem to have close the wealth they pose at having so even though he seems to have it, doesn't mean he does). 

 

I just cannot find a reason why to associate with these people let alone on camera for national distribution. 

 

I will say that I think Shervin's inclusion carry over from last season to perhaps an even larger role apparently sent Mike scurrying past the nearest botox clinic right to the auto detailers and told them to knock that shit out.  His face looks like Barbara Walters and Barbra Streisand shot a music video together.  In that regard he and Jessica are a perfect match.  I think if you felt a migraine coming on you could rub against his face and it might just go away.

[Petunia13]

Tommy and MJ are cuter than shit together.

[tinaw]

Omg! Vida is a pill

[ExplainItAgain]

I like MJ and Tommy together. I liked Asa's description of him that he's rough around the edges, but he has fun with it. That poor dog though...

 

GG was scary outside the club. Couldn't understand a word she said.

 

Mike is such a hot mess. Jessica looks like a wax doll.