NFL Thread

[Bastet]

I would root for any team in the league other than the Cowboys against the Patriots, so two weeks from now I'll be the biggest Falcons team you've ever seen for a day.

I used to like the Steelers, and they're my best friend's favorite team, but I cannot cheer for a team with Big Raping Ben behind center.  So while I was rooting for them in theory, just because it's the Patriots, I had the game on as background noise and couldn't get invested. 

And even if the Pats win the Super Bowl, I'll still have the memory of my G-Men handing them their ass twice, so I'm good.

[mojoween]

I'm tired of the anti-Roger narrative perpetuated by the media.

I'm tired of the Pats acting like they're fucking persecuted.  Brady got a rest to hang out with his wife and kids and they're still in the Super Bowl.  Shut your face.

I'm tired of bad football.

I'm tired of GOAT talk because each era is so goddamned different.  If Brady played in the 80's, his numbers would be a lot different, considering how flustered he gets when he gets hit, and in the 80's it was open season on QB's and receivers.

I'm tired of the fact that none of this matters because I still watch.  They've even gotten me interested in the damn Pro Bowl again.

[caracas1914]

Great solid performance by the Pats, and again, that defense more than held their own.

2 weeks to see what they do to try to counter that explosive Falcons offensive arsenal, but it can't be as bad as the hapless Packers.

Not scoring from the one foot line (if that) is Ben allergic to the quarterback sneak, and yeah, I know he doesn't call the plays...

[Moose135]

9 hours ago, Bastet said:

And even if the Pats win the Super Bowl, I'll still have the memory of my G-Men handing them their ass twice, so I'm good.

That's why I don't mind the Pats so much.  And while I'm rooting for Atlanta, how much fun would it be to watch Goodell have to hand the trophy to the Pats after all that has transpired this year?

[mojoween]

6 minutes ago, Moose135 said:

And while I'm rooting for Atlanta, how much fun would it be to watch Goodell have to hand the trophy to the Pats after all that has transpired this year?

None.  None at all.  I just cannot with the Pats.

Besides, Arthur Blank looks like a lot of fun.  Everyone has to win for the first time, right?

[basiltherat]

In a battle of owners, Blank looks like way more fun that Kraft.  (Wonder who would dance better -- Blank or Marty Bennett?)

[Constantinople]

Enough about which team has the better defense, who's better at 3rd down conversion, etc.  I have the important statistics that will predict who wins the Super Bowl

The winner of the AFC East has always won the Super Bowl when it's played in Houston.

The Patriots have never lost the Super Bowl to a team with a bird mascot.

The Falcons have never won the Super Bowl after beating a team from the Midwest to win the NFC Championship.

[Kip Hackman]

As much as I hate the Pats, as a Panther fan, I can't pull for the Falcons either.  Probably skipping the SB altogether.

[MarkHB]

1 hour ago, Constantinople said:

The winner of the AFC East has always won the Super Bowl when it's played in Houston.

I just looked at the list, and I'm stunned that this will only be the 3rd SB to be played in Houston.  I'm even more stunned that none of them were played in the Astrodome (2 at Reliant, and SB VIII at Rice Stadium which was also the last NFL game that counted to have the goalposts at the front of the end zones).

[hendersonrocks]

I am LOVING this Patricia sweatshirt sported by Blount after the game. And yes, I unapologetically root for the Pats. I lived in Boston during the 2001 - 2004 stretch and can't stop/won't stop loving them.

[Silver Raven]

28 minutes ago, hendersonrocks said:

I am LOVING this Patricia sweatshirt sported by Blount after the game. And yes, I unapologetically root for the Pats. I lived in Boston during the 2001 - 2004 stretch and can't stop/won't stop loving them.

Way to show your kid how things are done, by calling people you don't like, a girl.

[Fukui San]

6 minutes ago, Silver Raven said:

Way to show your kid how things are done, by calling people you don't like, a girl.*

*The defensive coordinator of the Patriots is named Matt Patricia.  The shirt is not an insult.

[DrSpaceman73]

I don't really get what the big deal is about that sweatshirt.  Why is it so great?

[Fukui San]

Probably because they made the Patriots logo look like Patricia's bearded face. 

[xaxat]

Welp, I'm two for three on playoff beards this past year. Penguins win, Maine Endwell (my local Little League team) wins. . . the Steelers, not so much.

But hell, if my powers can help my teams consistently get to their respective Final Fours, then I might have to continue to use them for good.

(Translation: Get lazy, decide not to shave and eventually call the scruff on my face a playoff beard.)

[hendersonrocks]

Quote

I don't really get what the big deal is about that sweatshirt.  Why is it so great?

I mean, it's a sweatshirt so no, it's not going to bring about world peace or cure cancer. I personally like it because it's clever (his face on the logo & a good play on Patriots) and because Matt Patricia is really good at his job. I also just like hoodies. The end.

[DrSpaceman73]

I guess I fail to see how its that clever. 

But then I rarely see things the same way as patriots fans. 

[hendersonrocks]

Good grief. (Roger, is that you?)

[DrSpaceman73]

Good grief indeed

Anyone failing to acknowledge the greatness of anything Patriots, including a sweatshirt, must be a "hater" I guess. 

[MarkHB]

This is from the NFL Notebook in my local paper this morning:

Quote

PATRIOTS: A New England Patriots fan entered a not-guilty plea Monday in East Boston Municipal Court to charges stemming from an incident in which he allegedly pulled a fire alarm early Sunday inside the Boston Hilton Logan Airport hotel in which the Pittsburgh Steelers were staying.

“I’m drunk, I’m stupid, I’m a Pats fan,” Dennis Harrison told Massachusetts State Police, according to the Boston Globe, after he allegedly set off the alarm about 15 hours before kickoff of the AFC championship game. Harrison, who was released on his personal recognizance, was charged with disorderly conduct, disturbing the peace and setting off a false fire alarm.

The idea for the prank was hatched when friends at a housewarming party Harrison was attending dared him to pull the alarm. A friend drove the 25-year-old to the hotel in his car and he went in through the main entrance and pulled the nearest alarm on the second floor at 3:40 a.m., according to the state police. He ran out to his car, but it and his keys were gone. As Harrison walked away from the hotel, he was stopped by state police and told them he was waiting for an Uber car. After a few moments of questioning, he admitted to pulling the alarm and expressed regret, according to Trooper Bryan Erickson’s report.

So he pulls the alarm, goes outside... and his buddies had ditched him!

[AimingforYoko]

Best comment I've heard on this story, "Drunk, stupid and a Pats fan is no way to go through life, son."

[twoods]

He confessed to it but he's pleading not guilty? He must be really, really stupid...

[caracas1914]

i thought was was interesting regarding highest scoring offenses versus least scoring allowed defenses in the SB, of which this would be the 6th encounter:

http://thefalconswire.usatoday.com/2017/01/24/falcons-and-super-bowl-li-does-defense-win-championships/

So of course the one exception would be the biggest blow out in SB history, Niners crushing the Broncos 55-10 in SB XXIV

[merylinkid]

He admitted it, but you don't plead guilty because then you can't give an explanation.   Although drunk and stupid is not really an explanation.   Thankfully this is a Boston Court so hopefully he gets probation (although pulling a fire alarm is only a good idea if there is an actual fire).

[topanga]

21 hours ago, merylinkid said:

He admitted it, but you don't plead guilty because then you can't give an explanation.   Although drunk and stupid is not really an explanation.   Thankfully this is a Boston Court so hopefully he gets probation (although pulling a fire alarm is only a good idea if there is an actual fire).

I was watching a comedy show with Jeff Ross, and in one scene, he was doing a ride-along with two Boston PD officers. He jokingly asked what's the worst crime Tom Brady could commit and still get away with? One of the officers (jokingly?) said that if Tom Brady committed murder, he'd try to find a way to make it look like self-defense. His partner laughed and said, "Man, you can't say that." 

[MarkHB]

On 1/24/2017 at 11:33 AM, caracas1914 said:

So of course the one exception would be the biggest blow out in SB history, Niners crushing the Broncos 55-10 in SB XXIV

The best thing about that game was that it was a wider margin than 46-10.

[Constantinople]

On 1/24/2017 at 11:33 AM, caracas1914 said:

i thought was was interesting regarding highest scoring offenses versus least scoring allowed defenses in the SB, of which this would be the 6th encounter:

http://thefalconswire.usatoday.com/2017/01/24/falcons-and-super-bowl-li-does-defense-win-championships/

So of course the one exception would be the biggest blow out in SB history, Niners crushing the Broncos 55-10 in SB XXIV

I believe the 49ers, in addition to having the highest scoring offense that season, also had the 3rd best scoring defense.  I'm not sure where Atlanta ranks on that score (pun not intended).

In any case, I don't mean to distract us from more important stats

The Patriots have never lost the Super Bowl to a team that has ever played in the NFC West or to an expansion team.

The Falcons have never won a Super Bowl when the last name of the opposing team's QB ended with the letter Y.

The Patriots have never lost the Super Bowl when Tom Brady finished the season as the starting QB after someone else started as QB in the season opener.

Edited January 25, 2017 by Constantinople
Changed ''Falcons have won" to "Falcons have never won" - Thank you King of Birds

[King of Birds]

44 minutes ago, Constantinople said:

The Falcons have won a Super Bowl when the last name of the opposing team's QB ended with the letter Y.

You forgot a "never" in this sentence.

Edited January 25, 2017 by King of Birds

[MarkHB]

1 hour ago, Constantinople said:

The Patriots have never lost the Super Bowl when Tom Brady finished the season as the starting QB after someone else started as QB in the season opener.

True fact: I went to exactly 1 game at the old Foxboro Stadium.  Three things stand out to me about that day:

1. We were sitting above the south end zone, under the big scoreboard.  All the scoring for both teams happened in the north end zone.
2. It was the first game after 9/11.  Things were weird. The paper American flag I was given that day still flies in the corner of my cubicle at work.
3. It was the day Drew Bledsoe got hurt and some guy no one had heard of named Tom Brady came in.

[stealinghome]

Did Roger Goodell actually say that the Thursday Night games are of higher quality than the regular games? #alternativefacts indeed.

[bosawks]

42 minutes ago, stealinghome said:

Did Roger Goodell actually say that the Thursday Night games are of higher quality than the regular games? #alternativefacts indeed.

I think the ideal gas law effects the way we perceive the Thursday night games and therefore they are, in scientific fact, better....

[mojoween]

The skills competition is super fun to watch so far.  Sean and Chuckie are taking their play by play duties very seriously.  Chuckie even gave Kirk Cousins crap for throwing poorly to OBJ.

I got very into the whole thing and was stoked that the NFC won.  I was less happy that Phillip Rivers won the pass competition.  

This got a lot of positive reaction on social media with the biggest hit being dodgeball.  I loved the dodgeball too.  It made me sad though because no one is allowed to play dodgeball in school any more.

Edited January 27, 2017 by mojoween

[Constantinople]

I don't understand people who buy Conference Championship hats, t-shirts, sweatshirts, etc.  Those hats and shirts will either be obsolete in a few weeks or a reminder that your team lost the Super Bowl.

Edited January 27, 2017 by Constantinople

[SuburbanHangSuite]

21 hours ago, mojoween said:

It made me sad though because no one is allowed to play dodgeball in school any more.

Seriously.  That's what's wrong with kids today.  Dodgeball teaches life lessons.

[Silver Raven]

Dodgeball was designed for bullies who aren't technically allowed to assault their normal victims.

[mojoween]

1 hour ago, Constantinople said:

I don't understand people who buy Conference Championship hats, t-shirts, sweatshirts, etc.  Those hats and shirts will either be obsolete in a few weeks or a reminder that your team lost the Super Bowl.

I have conference championship shirts for both the NFL and NCAA men's hoops.  Even if the Super Bowl or tourney was lost, there is still only one champion for the conference.

[Carey]

Agreed on the Conference stuff.  I don't think it's anything like touching a conference trophy, but as a "civilian" it's the fact that you've gone through a successful season.  Most teams don't even make it to the end game (or in men's hoops, the end games in end city), especially Houston, who hasn't even made a conference title game let alone win one!  When my team won a couple super bowls within a short period (now ages ago), I rotated between conference champ gear and super bowl gear.  It didn't matter since my team had won that year. A couple years later, I had no issue wearing a conference title hat in a year they lost but the team itself was glorified enough to where I'd get a pass

I guess different strokes for different folks.  Although when it comes to division gear, I agree I'll pass on that stuff!

[MarkHB]

Interesting article  (linked from my local paper, originally from The Washington Post) about the relationship between Belichick and Brady.  Key takeaway, at least for me: that the whole thing works because Brady is willing to take the same lumps as everyone else in the locker room and on the practice field. 

Quote

But if Belichick is a brainwasher, Brady has been the lead hypnotist. According to close observers, the Patriots’ ethos begins with Brady’s fundamental acquiescence to Belichick’s authority, even when it hurts.

“Players learn from players, and when you walk into that place and watch how Brady conducts his business, you know that’s how you do it there,” says Damon Huard, who served as a backup quarterback for the Patriots from 2001 to 2003.

[DrSpaceman73]

Tom Brady's dad can shut up anytime. 

He obviously is just parroting what Brady would LIKE to say.  If Brady thinks those things, and I am sure he does if his dad is saying them, he should just say it himself, not send his dad out there to do it for him and then act like "I am just focusing on the game and put that behind me". 

Such a lame and gutless thing to do.   Hide behind lawyers, your owner and your dad the whole time, fighting your battles. 

[DrSpaceman73]

On ‎1‎/‎27‎/‎2017 at 4:26 PM, Constantinople said:

I don't understand people who buy Conference Championship hats, t-shirts, sweatshirts, etc.  Those hats and shirts will either be obsolete in a few weeks or a reminder that your team lost the Super Bowl.

I bought a conference championship game shirt and hat right after the Colts-Pats conference game 10 years ago.  It was a classic game and a reminder of being their to see it in person.  I couldn't go to the Superbowl.  Most people cannot afford Superbowl tickets.  The Superbowl is not for the average fan, its for the rich, some select season ticket holders and corporations.  The conference championship games are the last chance for the typical fan to really see their team win in person for the year even if they do make a superbowl, win or lose.  Its why people buy them in the NFL and mean more to some people than the Superbowl shirts and memorabilia

[merylinkid]

Not a fan of grown men having their dads speak up for them.   Didn't like it when Archie Manning threw a temper tantrum on behalf of Eli going to the Chargers.   Don't like it now when Tom Brady's dad does it.   But I take issue with Brady "hiding behind lawyers."   He exercised his legal right to challenge an unjust suspension.   You do that with lawyers.   Because lawyers spend 3 years in law school obtaining specialized knowledge.   We have to pass an exam to even practice law.   Anyone who tries to take on a case with the complexity of Brady's by themselves instead of using lawyers is an idiot.   

Using a lawyer is not hiding.   It is exercising your rights.

[Jx223]

This year's Pro Bowl has started out slow. The AFC defense has been playing well so far, but I hope the NFC ends up winning.

Edited January 30, 2017 by Jx223

[Fukui San]

Former safety John Lynch hired as Niners GM. Six year deal. 

No managerial experience whatsoever. Straight from the broadcast booth. 

[stealinghome]

24 minutes ago, Fukui San said:

Former safety John Lynch hired as Niners GM. Six year deal. 

No managerial experience whatsoever. Straight from the broadcast booth. 

This is either going to be a genius move or a dumpster fire. Maybe everyone with experience took one look at Jed York and fled....

[mojoween]

A lot of side-eye has been given to the hire and curiosity if Louis Riddick was a consideration.

Cousins throwing successfully to OBJ and Dez Bryant is too much for me to comprehend.

Come on NFC.  Represent!

[xaxat]

2 hours ago, Fukui San said:

Former safety John Lynch hired as Niners GM. Six year deal. 

Six years!?

[merylinkid]

The 49ers wanted the John Elway experience.   They are going to get Matt Millen.  Lynch is a nice guy but he has no clue how to run a team.   

You know why Ozzie Newsome is an awesome if narrowly focused GM?   Because after his playing days were over, he worked his way up from scout to GM.   He learned the off the field stuff.   Lynch does not have that.   Now Elway didn't either, but he ran his car dealerships so he had management experience.  Even then he had some missteps.   Lynch does not know how to evaluate players.   He knows who were good players when he played, he knows how to discuss a good player in a game, but he does not know how to spot a good player out of a bunch players at the same position.   He doesn't know what makes a good player good.

[Silver Raven]

Those red AFC unis with bright yellow shoes made my eyes bleed.

[QTBlueMoon]

On 1/27/2017 at 2:43 PM, Silver Raven said:

Dodgeball was designed for bullies who aren't technically allowed to assault their normal victims.

Dodgeball was the only place I could get back at them. They'd get me after school, but they'd get me after school anyway. But this way, I could get my licks in.

[voiceover]

WTF with the yoga pants in this game??

*gagging noise*

eta: Just saw Kelce's Heisman-ing, and laughed.  Yeah, he's a dick sometimes.  But he's our dick.

Edited January 30, 2017 by voiceover