The Bachelor in the Media

[MakeMeLaugh]

14 hours ago, chocolatine said:

 

I might actually have to quit the franchise for real because of this. This is now the third time that someone with a history of racist social media activity has made it onto the show. A high schooler would have been able to screen this information out, so at this point it's obvious that Fleiss & co. are deliberately casting these people because, to them, any publicity is good publicity. I feel that if I keep watching the shows I'll enable TPTB to continue this pattern, and it makes me sick to my stomach.

I agree. I do not want this type of person presented as normal for dramatic purposes. ALL the blame for this kind of manipulated plot line (to make the lead seem heroic when he turns the tables on a situation the show itself is creating) lies on the show. There are not “very fine people on both sides.” Enough.

[ByTor]

2 hours ago, MakeMeLaugh said:

I do not want this type of person presented as normal for dramatic purposes

And what is so dramatic about it, since, as was pointed out this is the third time the show has pulled this?  It's now become just a routine part of the show.

[seacliffsal]

So, I just saw the ad in which Colton doesn't have a shirt on but does have on a red scarf.  While I smiled at the "puppy" ad, this one just boggles my mind.  Really?  This is what they think will attract viewers?  Okay then.

[leighdear]

I do believe that once upon a time, the show did actually want to cast quality individuals.  But it's gone on for so long, and the contestants have devolved into trashy, low-rent and shallow caricatures of decent humans.  And sadly, the audience has proved that scumbags and skanks draw just as large a viewership.  

I'm out for this sham of a season, but since I'm a devoted Steve reader, I'll see who emerges as the next female lead.  If I can see any shred of redeeming value in whomever that is, I'll do one more season. But if not, I'll bypass the franchise for good. 

I'll put up with a lot of crap on my TV, but this show and every iteration of it is firmly on the bubble for me. 

Edited December 14, 2018 by leighdear

[Token]

I'm not watching this season either.  I've managed to wean myself off most of the franchise now.  And I might skip the Bachelorette too, since this crop of women just seems like a bunch of idiot Instagram 'models'.  I'm only here for the snark.

[ApprenticeFan]

4 hours ago, Token said:

I'm not watching this season either.  I've managed to wean myself off most of the franchise now.  And I might skip the Bachelorette too, since this crop of women just seems like a bunch of idiot Instagram 'models'.  I'm only here for the snark.

Yeah, Colton's season has half of the women are 25 and under.

[adhoc]

But man-child Colton himself is not much older, so in this case I don't see it being an issue.

Whatever, though--apparently I'm the only one who thinks he's gay, and that production knows it, and it's all a farce. 

(Yes, I realize there could be other reasons why Colton seems so detached from women in a romantic way, whether due to religious or family upbringing, or due to small dick syndrome, or as a result of previous trauma as a kid, or whatever. And yet, my mind keeps insisting that he's gay. Guess time will tell.)

[Thorkim]

4 hours ago, adhoc said:

But man-child Colton himself is not much older, so in this case I don't see it being an issue.

Whatever, though--apparently I'm the only one who thinks he's gay, and that production knows it, and it's all a farce. 

(Yes, I realize there could be other reasons why Colton seems so detached from women in a romantic way, whether due to religious or family upbringing, or due to small dick syndrome, or as a result of previous trauma as a kid, or whatever. And yet, my mind keeps insisting that he's gay. Guess time will tell.)

I believe it too, I may be wrong, who knows?  We'll see how the season plays out.  But you are not alone.

[leighdear]

I could see him preferring the penis.  He doesn't exude loads of femininity, but as those muscles are football/gym-built, and frankly aren't even that good, nor does he demonstrate much male self-confidence. 

Body-wise, none of the other guys have been close to matching the Sean Lowe bod.  That was amazing.  But I don't think even he has it anymore.  

[Token]

Add me to the list of people who think Colton is gay and this is all a farce.  Too bad they won't ever have a gay bachelor or bachelorette.  

[chocolatine]

I don't know (or care) what Colton's deal is, but who would have anything to gain from putting a closeted gay man in the Bachelor spot? For all of the show's trashiness, they still pretend that they care about "right reasons" and the "journey to find love".

1 hour ago, Token said:

Too bad they won't ever have a gay bachelor or bachelorette.  

I think the problem with that would be that contestants would hook up with each other - The Bachelor/Bachelorette would turn into Bachelor In Paradise. This show only works because it creates a Stockholm syndrome environment where 25-30 heterosexual contestants vie for one "prize" of the opposite sex. There's no other man/woman to attract their attention, so everyone starts to believe that they're attracted to the "prize", even though in a real life situation, most of them wouldn't be. 

[leighdear]

15 hours ago, chocolatine said:

I don't know (or care) what Colton's deal is, but who would have anything to gain from putting a closeted gay man in the Bachelor spot? For all of the show's trashiness, they still pretend that they care about "right reasons" and the "journey to find love".

 

For the same reason people with no interest in an engagement and people already in relationships go on the show. 

Exposure, travel, social media opportunities, media contacts, future franchise events, branding opportunities, name recognition, access to other reality shows, celebrity contacts, professional networking, film clips, professional photos, free food & drink, etc, etc, etc.....  ;-)

[Token]

This show stopped being about right reasons and finding love a long time ago.

And it's fairly offensive to suggest that gay people are automatically going to hook up with each other all the time while on the show.  What, they have no self control and are just perverts who need to have sex constantly?

[chocolatine]

18 minutes ago, Token said:

And it's fairly offensive to suggest that gay people are automatically going to hook up with each other all the time while on the show.  What, they have no self control and are just perverts who need to have sex constantly?

That's not what I meat at all. I meant that in a group of 25-30 gay men or lesbian women, a contestant is just as likely to be attracted to any other contestant as they are to the lead. There would not be the artificially created scenario where there's only one person that any contestant can be attracted to, so there also wouldn't be the competition that is the cornerstone of the show. I'm all for having an LGBTQ+ dating show on TV, I just don't think that it would work in the same format as The Bachelor/Bachelorette (and I also wouldn't want Mike Fleiss to have anything to do with it).

Edited December 18, 2018 by chocolatine

[ByTor]

Something similar did happen with a hetero person, though.  That one woman (I think her name was Roz?) was kicked off one of the Bachelor seasons because she hooked up with a producer.

[JudyObscure]

31 minutes ago, ByTor said:

Something similar did happen with a hetero person, though.  That one woman (I think her name was Roz?) was kicked off one of the Bachelor seasons because she hooked up with a producer.

I was just remembering Roz!  Chris Harrison was so mad at her he could barely contain himself and she was like, "Oh what now?  Was that wrong?" LOL

I think she proves Chocolatine's point.  Attractive young people with lots of down time away from the Prize are likely to look around for other options.

[hnygrl]

12 hours ago, Token said:

This show stopped being about right reasons and finding love a long time ago.

And it's fairly offensive to suggest that gay people are automatically going to hook up with each other all the time while on the show.  What, they have no self control and are just perverts who need to have sex constantly?

Nobody's saying that. Let's get real here for a minute and stop making it perverted/sexual. That's not what anybody means.

The very thing I'm about to write about happened on Bachelor Australia. Two of the Bachelorettes hooked up. With each other. And are dating now.

They are trapped together in a tiny little space, two, three, four to a room. They can't go outside, not even for a darn walk, they can't go clubbing, they can't even watch TV OR read a book! Not even a BOOK! They only have each other and their handlers to talk to. When the handlers go back to their hotels/go home if they're in LA still? They only have each other.

If you're surrounded by stunningly beautiful men/women, and you're only into men/women, you're gonna fall for EACH OTHER. It's gonna happen. You optimistically spend maybe 2, 3 hours top with the Star (Bachelor/ette) and the rest of the time (if you don't get a one-on-one) is spent with your fellow contestants.

In a same-sex-season, they WILL fall in love with/hook up with EACH OTHER because they get to know each other intimately well. They're all they've got. Nobody else to talk to, no books to read, no games, no TV, no outside influences whatsoever. They can't even go down to the store to get tampons or razors. The handlers have to do that for them. They're basically prisoners in a gilded cage. They only have each other for entertainment for weeks. Yeah, if it's a same-sex group? They will definitely fall for each other.

[call me ishmael]

51 minutes ago, hnygrl said:

Nobody's saying that. Let's get real here for a minute and stop making it perverted/sexual. That's not what anybody means.

The very thing I'm about to write about happened on Bachelor Australia. Two of the Bachelorettes hooked up. With each other. And are dating now.

They are trapped together in a tiny little space, two, three, four to a room. They can't go outside, not even for a darn walk, they can't go clubbing, they can't even watch TV OR read a book! Not even a BOOK! They only have each other and their handlers to talk to. When the handlers go back to their hotels/go home if they're in LA still? They only have each other.

If you're surrounded by stunningly beautiful men/women, and you're only into men/women, you're gonna fall for EACH OTHER. It's gonna happen. You optimistically spend maybe 2, 3 hours top with the Star (Bachelor/ette) and the rest of the time (if you don't get a one-on-one) is spent with your fellow contestants.

In a same-sex-season, they WILL fall in love with/hook up with EACH OTHER because they get to know each other intimately well. They're all they've got. Nobody else to talk to, no books to read, no games, no TV, no outside influences whatsoever. They can't even go down to the store to get tampons or razors. The handlers have to do that for them. They're basically prisoners in a gilded cage. They only have each other for entertainment for weeks. Yeah, if it's a same-sex group? They will definitely fall for each other.

After all this is basically what happens with BIP.  Everyone on that show was “deeply, madly” in love with the lead but throw them together with other options...

[ByTor]

1 hour ago, hnygrl said:

They only have each other for entertainment for weeks

Each other and...don't forget...free-flowing booze.

[MakeMeLaugh]

14 hours ago, chocolatine said:

That's not what I meat at all. I meant that in a group of 25-30 gay men or lesbian women, a contestant is just as likely to be attracted to any other contestant as they are to the lead....

Probably more attracted, considering some of the leads!

[JenE4]

A million years ago MTV had a “bisexual bachelorette” type show with Tia Tequila. Everyone in the house hooked up with each other and poor Tia was just all alone like hellooooo?!? It was awesome. 

I 100% think Colton is gay because of “football” being his reason why he’s a virgin. I’d bet that the big twist ending is that he comes out.

[hyacinth]

I saw Colton just standing there in a suit looking uneasy twice on TV ads yesterday.   I felt nauseous or maybe I felt nauseated, I can never remember which one means I want to throw up in my mouth a little.   

Edited December 20, 2018 by hyacinth

[Wandering Snark]

I've been on the "Maybe he's just not that into women" bandwagon since his first showing to us. This will be the most. dramatic. season. evar. because maybe he will finally figure out that it's just not happening for him because he not into women beyond a "looks and appearances" way to prove he's a 'normal' guy. We know he has chased only high profile women that make him look like a real redblooded american male stereotype. We've all seen through that charade. He is going to have the largest population of friend zoned 'ettes ever.

I hope he does figure out how to find happiness but I doubt even more than usual that "our lead man" will do so in this format. I mean he was clearly terrified that he might have to deal with a woman in a sexual way in a fantasy suite. That lead to that terribly awkward convo with CH about what happens in them.

So, yeah, I feel like this season is more of a sham than usual even.

Edited December 21, 2018 by Wandering Snark

[JudyObscure]

Another possibility is that he's just not that into anyone.  That's a new and growing group of young men who don't find three dimensional women as appealing as the low maintenance, photo shopped ones they've been "dating" since they were fourteen. These women never get pimples, their schedule is convenient (after football practice) and they don't cry when you break up with them.

[Mu Shu]

On 12/6/2018 at 3:36 PM, leighdear said:

Wow, lots of those photos are NOT flattering.  They all look so harsh, exaggerated and shiny.  

And how many more seasons are we going to have all the women with the exact same hairstyles?   Where's Kelsey Poe when you need her?  *ROFL*

Angelique.  Short, flattering hairstyle, pretty girl.  I’m sure she’ll go soon. 

[JudyObscure]

Taking a break from all this kindness and good will to have a shallow look at the contestants faces.  As we know they can look like tens in those photos and then lose all their points as soon as they start talking and moving around.  So, subject to change the first night, my early favorite to win is Hannah.  I also think Laura, Reviana and Tahzjuan are stand outs. I would add Elyse, but she's a red head and we've seen how they usually get bounced the first night.  What is that all about?  Do the set lights wash them out into vampire territory?

I think Bri looks like Ben Higgin's Lauren. 

 Erin's eyelashes are too pointy -- get the hook!

[Mu Shu]

2 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

Taking a break from all this kindness and good will to have a shallow look at the contestants faces.  As we know they can look like tens in those photos and then lose all their points as soon as they start talking and moving around.  So, subject to change the first night, my early favorite to win is Hannah.  I also think Laura, Reviana and Tahzjuan are stand outs. I would add Elyse, but she's a red head and we've seen how they usually get bounced the first night.  What is that all about?  Do the set lights wash them out into vampire territory?

I think Bri looks like Ben Higgin's Lauren. 

 Erin's eyelashes are too pointy -- get the hook!

You’re so mean.  There’s one that looks like a rat, but I forget which one .  Oneyanka has some pretty bad looking stenciled brows. 

[seacliffsal]

I just read my recent copy of Entertainment Weekly and there was a multiple page spread detailing the timeline and events of the entire first meet and greet of Colton and the women.  No spoilers were in the article, but Entertainment Weekly has never done such an elaborate spread for the Bachelor before (well, at least to my knowledge, and I have subscribed for several years).  I was wondering if ABC thinks there's going to be lower than usual ratings for the season and are trying to build up more interest in it.  

[LBS]

2 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

 

I just read my recent copy of Entertainment Weekly and there was a multiple page spread detailing the timeline and events of the entire first meet and greet of Colton and the women

 

I read that as well.  It wasn’t the most flattering article either.  Quoting Fleiss calling one contestant ‘rating killer’ was weird.  I also think they know this season will be a bad and are trying to gin up interest in any way.

ps: last night I dreamt about being on the Bachelor and I actually fell in love with Colton but  he turned out to be a cad like Arie. I also went on a group date Krystal and I accidentally spilled a glass of red wine on us both and she accused me of sabotage but my excuse was that I was wearing a white dress so why would I do it on purpose.  Then baby Becca bought me and her a new dress.  I need to not fall asleep looking at Instagram and Twitter!! Lol!

[Wandering Snark]

Unfortunately I think your dream was more interesting and entertaining than anything we'll see this season...

At Christmas my cousin (who is a 32 year old policeman in the city) and I were watching basketball and a Bachelor ad came on. He looked at me and said "I can't wait!" so I guess there is some draw out there. I muttered something about Colton being a sham and no more was said on the topic.

[leighdear]

I must have missed this a couple of weeks back.....

https://hollywoodlife.com/2018/12/18/bachelor-nikki-ferrell-tyler-vanloo-divorce-split/

Who'd have thought Juan Pablo would be the one still married?  He's only made it a year & a half so far, so he's still got time to crash & burn... ;-)

Edited December 30, 2018 by leighdear

[EllenB]

10 hours ago, leighdear said:

I must have missed this a couple of weeks back.....

https://hollywoodlife.com/2018/12/18/bachelor-nikki-ferrell-tyler-vanloo-divorce-split/

Who'd have thought Juan Pablo would be the one still married?  He's only made it a year & a half so far, so he's still got time to crash & burn... ;-)

Well, this article wins the dubious Massive Misuse of Quotation Marks Award.

[ApprenticeFan]

13 hours ago, leighdear said:

I must have missed this a couple of weeks back.....

https://hollywoodlife.com/2018/12/18/bachelor-nikki-ferrell-tyler-vanloo-divorce-split/

Who'd have thought Juan Pablo would be the one still married?  He's only made it a year & a half so far, so he's still got time to crash & burn... ;-)

And yeah, the first former Bachelor winner who got divorced. Most of the former winners are now married. Lauren B (OG), Vanessa, Vienna and Courtney are remained single.

[fib]

On 12/16/2018 at 10:15 PM, chocolatine said:

I don't know (or care) what Colton's deal is, but who would have anything to gain from putting a closeted gay man in the Bachelor spot? For all of the show's trashiness, they still pretend that they care about "right reasons" and the "journey to find love".

 

After rewatching and hearing about the fact that he fell off the face of the Bachelor World, Ive come to the conclusion that the first ever Bachelor, Alex Michel, was quite possibly a closeted gay man.  

His season, in hindsight, he seemed to be performing interest in the women, more than being actually interested in any of them.  At the time I chalked it up to the awkwardness of the format and show, but his taste in women seemed performative rather than genuine, IMHO.  He was a 31-year old man who was single, stayed single long after the show, and is apparently still single? Not even George Clooney has that track record.  I may be way off, and if so, sorry Alex.  I just honestly think that "confirmed bachelor" is a weird thing to be in 2018.

https://www.bustle.com/articles/137741-whats-season-1-bachelor-alex-michel-doing-now-even-chris-harrison-hasnt-seen-him

 

So I guess my point is, who would have something to gain? Fleiss.  The MOST DRAMA EVER!. And its not like he cares about the contestants. That we know. 

Edited January 3, 2019 by fib

[leighdear]

And shots fired!

https://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/other/arie-luyendyk-jr-calls-out-former-bachelorette-rival-jef-holm/ar-BBRKS4E

I love this.  I've always adored Arie and despised Jef, so this made me laugh.  Unless Arie does something to screw upm the wedding, I think he & Lauren are going to be just fine and have a sweet little baby soon.  

[hnygrl]

22 hours ago, fib said:

After rewatching and hearing about the fact that he fell off the face of the Bachelor World, Ive come to the conclusion that the first ever Bachelor, Alex Michel, was quite possibly a closeted gay man.  

His season, in hindsight, he seemed to be performing interest in the women, more than being actually interested in any of them.  At the time I chalked it up to the awkwardness of the format and show, but his taste in women seemed performative rather than genuine, IMHO.  He was a 31-year old man who was single, stayed single long after the show, and is apparently still single? Not even George Clooney has that track record.  I may be way off, and if so, sorry Alex.  I just honestly think that "confirmed bachelor" is a weird thing to be in 2018.

1

That's SO unfair. If a WOMAN never wants to marry, it's cool. That's her prerogative. She's allowed to decide if she wants a man in her life or not, but if a MAN decides he never wants marriage or kids he'a GAY? If he's not at all attracted to the women SOMEONE ELSE picked out for him he's GAY? 

The dude doesn't live his life in social media. He (probably) just decided this was so not for him and went off into the sunset, and suddenly he's a closeted GAY man? WHY? Because he's SINGLE? When I was younger, "Confirmed Bachelor" was a thing. NOW? It's man-speak for GAY?

[Ms Blue Jay]

On 12/17/2018 at 12:15 AM, chocolatine said:

I think the problem with that would be that contestants would hook up with each other - The Bachelor/Bachelorette would turn into Bachelor In Paradise. This show only works because it creates a Stockholm syndrome environment where 25-30 heterosexual contestants vie for one "prize" of the opposite sex. There's no other man/woman to attract their attention, so everyone starts to believe that they're attracted to the "prize", even though in a real life situation, most of them wouldn't be. 

Regarding, The Gay Bachelor:

Actually, they did this show already, it was called Finding Prince Charming, and it was amazing.  I personally loved it.  I would continue to watch further seasons but it seemed to be a one and done.  Honestly, a lot of the men seemed VERY into the lead, who was quite handsome.  I think after the show concluded he was revealed to be a former escort, I think even to famous designers like Marc Jacobs, but eh?  (Shrugs shoulders.)   I don't think most contestants minded.

Edited January 4, 2019 by Ms Blue Jay

[violet and green]

On 1/4/2019 at 10:09 AM, hnygrl said:

When I was younger, "Confirmed Bachelor" was a thing. NOW? It's man-speak for GAY?

It's been around since Victorian times as a euphemism for gay.

[fib]

On 1/3/2019 at 4:09 PM, hnygrl said:

That's SO unfair. If a WOMAN never wants to marry, it's cool. That's her prerogative. She's allowed to decide if she wants a man in her life or not, but if a MAN decides he never wants marriage or kids he'a GAY? If he's not at all attracted to the women SOMEONE ELSE picked out for him he's GAY? 

Im not remotely saying that if ANY man decides to never marry, he's gay, Im saying that after watching Alex Michel on the show, and afterwards, I think its possible he is gay.  And just to be clear, That's not an insult.  Being gay is totally forking fine. Its only even remotely problematic if you are duping people and hurting them by willfully concealing that fact. 

And Alex Michel probably shouldnt have appeared on a show where women put their lives on hold to date him if he "never wanted marriage".  And it's not like Im judging based on the fact that he didnt choose one of the 16 women picked for him, Im judging based on the fact that in 48 years of life he has NEVER found anyone world wide who he wants to marry, despite having once presented himself nationwide as the "Country's Most Eligible Bachelor"

Quote

The dude doesn't live his life in social media. He (probably) just decided this was so not for him and went off into the sunset, and suddenly he's a closeted GAY man? WHY? Because he's SINGLE? When I was younger, "Confirmed Bachelor" was a thing. NOW? It's man-speak for GAY?

It's not only that he doesnt live his life on social media, its that he has completely disappeared, wont talk to Chris Harrison or any of the producers at all, even to the extent of not providing a statement to include in reunion shows of any kind (as evidenced in the link I included above)  

And "confirmed bachelor" isnt something I invented, see this wikipedia page for some backstory: "He never married/confirmed bachelor".  Maybe when you were younger you just werent aware of that, or it wasnt as true in your region as it was with my british family. 

[JudyObscure]

On ‎1‎/‎3‎/‎2019 at 6:09 PM, hnygrl said:

That's SO unfair. If a WOMAN never wants to marry, it's cool. That's her prerogative. She's allowed to decide if she wants a man in her life or not, but if a MAN decides he never wants marriage or kids he'a GAY? If he's not at all attracted to the women SOMEONE ELSE picked out for him he's GAY? 

I see that sort of speculation over women who never marry just as much as men.  Lately I've noticed it seeping into biographies of famous women who never married. All of a sudden all the women writers who never married were lesbians, and the companion or friend they lived with was their partner.  Not that there's anything wrong with that, but they're often basing this assumption on nothing much at all, particularly considering that women who lived alone frequently asked another woman to live with them in order to avoid scandal of another kind.

People just want to think other people are having sex. These days, it's the asexual person who dare not speak its name.

[Mu Shu]

On 1/4/2019 at 6:13 PM, violet and green said:

It's been around since Victorian times as a euphemism for gay.

I toured Mercer house in Savannah with my loud mouthed aunt.  Everyone in Savannah knew Jim Williams was gay, but to this day the tour guides will deny it.  She very loudly demanded to know why he never married, and the guide got pissy and said he was a confirmed bachelor.  Funny thing is he never hid it, savannah society did.

But yeah, I’ve always heard confirmed bachelor used, usually by the family.  

[reggiejax]

17 hours ago, fib said:

It's not only that he doesnt live his life on social media, its that he has completely disappeared, wont talk to Chris Harrison or any of the producers at all, even to the extent of not providing a statement to include in reunion shows of any kind (as evidenced in the link I included above)  

He hasn't disappeared. A quick search pulled up his LinkedIn page, and it shows that in the last two years, he co-founded a company called NewCo, based in DC. Just because he doesn't keep in touch with Bachelor Nation or Chris Harrison (heaven forbid), it hardly means he's gone into hiding. I know in this day and age, when people hang around on the edges of fame long after their sell-by-date, it seems strange that someone would go back to their regular life when their 15 minutes are up, but it does happen.

As for any other speculation about Alex Michel, whatever the truth is, we should agree that at the moment we don't know what the truth is. As has been stated, Michel is decidedly out of the public eye, and information is quite scarce. So point in fact, we don't know if he is a "confirmed bachelor" or if he is in fact married. Maybe he is closeted, maybe he is as out as out can be. Maybe he doesn't want to get married because he has personal issues, or maybe he doesn't want to get married because being single is far more preferable to him. Or maybe he is one of those incels I keep hearing about, and he may be ready to explode, so someone should check up on him. 

In any event, Michel has chosen to walk away from that part of his life (one which happened 17 years ago, btw). Considering there is no shortage of Bachelor Nation nitwits to keep up with, I don't think it is too big of a loss. 

[Mabinogia]

59 minutes ago, reggiejax said:

Just because he doesn't keep in touch with Bachelor Nation or Chris Harrison (heaven forbid), it hardly means he's gone into hiding.

To me that makes him the single smartest person to be involved in this shit show. I don't think they are contractually obligated to be part of Bachelor Nation for the rest of their lives and Alex Michel was on it in what Bach Years would be about 200 years ago. Good for him for getting the hell out of the Nation and having a real life. 

As for the not married thing, that's his business. I'm a 46 year old female who has never been married and never plans on marrying and never had any interest in doing anything sexual with another woman. Straight as a rod I am. I just don't feel the need to get married since I don't plan on having kids. Some people just don't want to get married, or haven't met the person they want to marry. 

We seem to be back to the American Dream concept that everyone has to have a house, a business and be married with 2/5 kids. I see it with a LOT of my late twenties early thirties friends. They are all married, or rushing to get married, buying houses and spitting out kids.  I don't really remember my peers doing that. When I was the age of the folks that go on this show, marriage and a house and family where the last things on my mind. I was living in the city, travelling and having adventures I wouldn't be able to with a mortgage, paying off a wedding and putting away money for college funds. IDK, different times. But Alex is from my generation so I don't think "Must get married" was burned into his brain. After all, we didn't have to keep up with the people who live their lives on Instagram back then. lol

[fib]

4 hours ago, Mabinogia said:

. Some people just don't want to get married, or haven't met the person they want to marry. 

Sure, but then dont go on a show to find the person ou want to marry. 

5 hours ago, reggiejax said:

He hasn't disappeared. A quick search pulled up his LinkedIn page, and it shows that in the last two years, he co-founded a company called NewCo, based in DC. Just because he doesn't keep in touch with Bachelor Nation or Chris Harrison (heaven forbid), it hardly means he's gone into hiding. I know in this day and age, when people hang around on the edges of fame long after their sell-by-date, it seems strange that someone would go back to their regular life when their 15 minutes are up, but it does happen.

He has essentially disappeared, even from independent pieces discussing the history of the show: from the Cut “Writer’s Note: I made multiple attempts to contact Alex, following leads from Wong, Chris Harrison, people who knew him at Harvard and Stanford, and his LinkedIn page. He appears to be the head of strategy at Microsoft in London; to his credit, he hasn’t been in the fold of the franchise for years. As Rob Mills, the ABC executive in charge of "alternative series," including The Bachelor, tells me, “He is absolutely the D.B. Cooper of The Bachelor” 

If you’re the DB COOPER of something, you are deep deepoff the grid. 

[chocolatine]

3 hours ago, fib said:

He has essentially disappeared, even from independent pieces discussing the history of the show: from the Cut “Writer’s Note: I made multiple attempts to contact Alex, following leads from Wong, Chris Harrison, people who knew him at Harvard and Stanford, and his LinkedIn page. He appears to be the head of strategy at Microsoft in London; to his credit, he hasn’t been in the fold of the franchise for years. As Rob Mills, the ABC executive in charge of "alternative series," including The Bachelor, tells me, “He is absolutely the D.B. Cooper of The Bachelor” 

If you’re the DB COOPER of something, you are deep deepoff the grid. 

Declining requests for interviews is not the same as disappearing. He just sounds like someone who wants to keep his life private and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Keep in mind that he had no idea that the Bachelor franchise would become the media juggernaut that it is, and he didn't expect people to remember him for it all those years later. It sounds like he has a great career, and the association with a tacky reality show won't do him any favors.

[ByTor]

13 hours ago, chocolatine said:

 Keep in mind that he had no idea that the Bachelor franchise would become the media juggernaut that it is,

He probably also didn't know what a shitshow it would become.  I don't blame him for wanting to distance himself from the franchise.  

22 hours ago, Mabinogia said:

To me that makes him the single smartest person to be involved in this shit show.

LOL sure does!

[saber5055]

I think speculation about anyone's sexual side is a waste of time. There are better things to do. Girls have always been raised to HAVE to be married and have children or they are nothing, a loss to society. Thanks the gods that thinking is changing, and women can now have professional careers and (some of them) make more money than a man. Whether they chose to sleep with men or women or no one at all means nothing. The same goes for men IMO. I judge people by how they present themselves and what they accomplish in the way of doing good or creating something worthwhile, not by with whom they have sex, or don't have sex. Making sex-partner preferences the No. 1 "thing" is so 1960s. Are unmarried women still called "old maids"? Or just lesbians? It seems they are, and unmarried men are all gay.

Yeah, right. NOT.

I'm on two online dating sites and 99 out of 100 men on both are divorced. To me, that speaks volumes about how "great" marriage is. After the fun of the engagement and wedding, one has to live with the person. That doesn't seem to be so popular.

The Bachelor is going up against AGT tonight. I'll be in for TB since AGT reruns on Saturday. Otherwise, tough decision given the lows to which TB franchise has sunk. See you guys in the episode thread tomorrow.

[ByTor]

It's a girl!

[Mu Shu]

Oh goody, babies clean up on Instagram. 

[EllenB]

4 hours ago, saber5055 said:

I think speculation about anyone's sexual side is a waste of time. There are better things to do. Girls have always been raised to HAVE to be married and have children or they are nothing, a loss to society. Thanks the gods that thinking is changing, and women can now have professional careers and (some of them) make more money than a man. Whether they chose to sleep with men or women or no one at all means nothing. The same goes for men IMO. I judge people by how they present themselves and what they accomplish in the way of doing good or creating something worthwhile, not by with whom they have sex, or don't have sex. Making sex-partner preferences the No. 1 "thing" is so 1960s. Are unmarried women still called "old maids"? Or just lesbians? It seems they are, and unmarried men are all gay.

Yeah, right. NOT.

I'm on two online dating sites and 99 out of 100 men on both are divorced. To me, that speaks volumes about how "great" marriage is. After the fun of the engagement and wedding, one has to live with the person. That doesn't seem to be so popular.

The Bachelor is going up against AGT tonight. I'll be in for TB since AGT reruns on Saturday. Otherwise, tough decision given the lows to which TB franchise has sunk. See you guys in the episode thread tomorrow.

1960s?  I graduated in 1968 and knew a lot of young women who had no interest in entering domestic captivity.  And those of us who did marry and/or had children did so in our 30s after establishing careers.  Of my high school friends, only a few have had children, now that I think about it.  You might have us confused with our mothers - although neither of my aunts had children, so they also forgot to read about the stereotypes. 😀

Edited January 8, 2019 by EllenB
Pinkie typed.