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S06.E16: Family Meeting


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(edited)
15 hours ago, Dminches said:

I do hope that Rebecca's end happens in the next episode and they use the finale to do a "Six Feet Under" closing.

 

Yes! Someone else said this also.  That remains my favorite series finale ever.

Edited to add: I know the realities of dementia/Alzheimers, and I'm glad they don't portray it in all its ugliness - this is bad enough, and "Us" is pretty dark and heavy as it is. I hope the series ends on an up beat, that next week is Rebecca's end, and the finale is the family sorting things out. Since we have already seen some scenes of Kate and Toby's grown son, I am hopeful.

Edited by salvame
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13 minutes ago, drafan said:

As soon as I saw the robotic cat , I said , "Oh no, the Pearsons never had a cat, so one of them is going to get Rebecca a Lee Middleton "Someone to Care For" memory care baby doll.

 

All the scenes of her looking after babies, I think a baby doll would have been more appropriate, it maybe would have tapped into some deep memories.

But about the robotic kitty, have you seen the ads for it? They are hilarious!!  But still I want one, but I am waiting for a Japanese made model.

Mr Blackie walked in and said what is your show about. "3siblings and their mother with dementia, do you want to watch it".  No comment, he just lived it.....

When Kevin phoned Randal did he say get the girls and Beth, or get the girls together? I can't remember if we see Beth is the fast forward scenes. 

In the last 2 episodes I wouldn't mind seeing something about Randall's girls lives since they have been on the show since nearly the start.  I do not want to see another future Jack episode and if that if what it is I will take a pass.

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6 hours ago, AriAu said:

Very touching episode and certainly well acted, but, and I am sure that this is not a popular opinion, but Rebecca was a good, loving dependable mom-at least to me, she didn't do anything that other moms don't do....TV moms and real moms.

Agree. Not sure why she would be considered "magical." 

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21 hours ago, txhorns79 said:

Beth really is the best.  You'll notice that Randall was proposing his plan to move Rebecca into he and Beth's home before we saw him speaking with Beth about it.  Classic Randall.

Beth talking to Phillip about the Pearsons:   "They're always trying to move someone into your house!"  Yep.  Kevin, William, etc.  

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3 hours ago, mansonlamps said:

  I was not a fan of her telling him secrets to keep from his siblings,  even if it was just the tooth fairy.

For me, this was fine. I am a few years older than my brother and sister and thus learned the truth about the Tooth Fairy before they even started losing their baby teeth. Knowing the truth while they still believed was kinda fun for me. It made me feel a little more grown-up that 1) I knew the truth, and 2) my parents trusted me not to ruin the magic for my siblings.

Rebecca really didn’t have a lot of options there. The very idea of the Tooth Fairy was freaking Randall out. She had to do something to ease his mind without taking the experience away from Kate and Kevin, especially since Kevin was excited. 

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I am so surprised spouses were not included with the Big Three decision. 

Instead relegated to the old cabin.

The Big 3 all wanting Rebecca to be with them without their spouses by their side to reaffirm how it would work out. Obviously Rebecca already had one nurse.

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(edited)

 

38 minutes ago, Blackie said:

When Kevin phoned Randal did he say get the girls and Beth, or get the girls together? I can't remember if we see Beth is the fast forward scenes. 

She is. Randall picks social-worker Tess up from her office, Annie picks up med-student/intern Deja from the hospital, and Beth comes from the ballet school and brings the pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey game. (Of course we have no idea what Annie's doing other than playing chauffer.)

24 minutes ago, Dani-Ellie said:

For me, this was fine. I am a few years older than my brother and sister and thus learned the truth about the Tooth Fairy before they even started losing their baby teeth. Knowing the truth while they still believed was kinda fun for me. It made me feel a little more grown-up that 1) I knew the truth, and 2) my parents trusted me not to ruin the magic for my siblings.

My brother is two and a half years older so he had a year or two to help play Santa before I figured it out. I figured out the Tooth Fairy when I was seven and my mom came to "check on me" after I went to bed on they day I lost a tooth and I heard the quarters clink in the pocket of her pajama top. Santa wasn't too far behind.

Edited by ams1001
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1 hour ago, AriAu said:

And maybe they decided there was only so much "miserableness" we could all take!

Misery?

18 minutes ago, Cosmocrush said:

Beth talking to Phillip about the Pearsons:   "They're always trying to move someone into your house!" 

The key to avoiding “move ins” is to not have extra rooms. If you have guest rooms, you’re gonna have guests.

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(edited)

IMO Randall has always thought he was now the patriarch of the family after Jack died. And he was not.

And Phillip, iirc Kate did want to move Rebecca in with you...

Edited by maggiemae
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I don't mind when timelines do not make sense or when someone is absent or that the ages really don't match up or that the careers are totally off center.  I love this show and will miss it very much.

I watch it for the pure pleasure of being entertained and having my emotions compeletely drained.  My sister walked into the room as I watched the end of the show and I was ugly crying.  She yelled, "Don't tell me!  Don't tell me!  I haven't watched it yet."  Then threw a box of tissue in my lap as she ran out of the room.

I think the last time I cried that hard over a film was when I watched Gone With the Wind and little Bonnie Blue Butler died. Rhett wouldn't let her be buried. because she was afraid of the dark.  Oh my goodness, by the time Hattie McDaniel (Mammy) got through wailing to Melanie, I was sobbing uncontrollaby.  That's the way I felt after watching this episode.

IMO, if you dwell on the "logic" and try to make the pieces fit together like a jigsaw puzzle, you won't enjoy the show as much.  I just go with it - whatever the writers throw out there - and enjoy the ride.

 

 

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12 hours ago, bichonblitz said:
15 hours ago, Laurie4H said:

And I might be in the minority but I am not a fan of Beths quirky, clever dialogue. I mean who says capiche?  

Italians. Often. Surprised Beth ever heard the word or knew it's meaning.

If Beth had known any Italian, she would have used the correct form of capire for addressing a group of people, which is (voi) capite. (Tu) capisci / (lei) capisce is used to address an individual, depending on formality. (I'm not Italian, just a language nerd.)

6 hours ago, deaja said:

She’s a Pearson. She applied for a bachelor’s , was denied admission, barged into the room and made a speech, and they said “oh you misunderstood! We denied your application because you’re too far advanced! We want to give you a masters’ degree just for applying to our program. Will you accept?” And she agreed, at which point the governor of California called her to personally ask her to oversee the education of all special needs individuals in the state.

I know you're joking, but there was a very similar storyline on the show Silicon Valley (which was a comedy though, not a drama like TIU). A character who was a college dropout but made a lot of money in tech tried to enroll in Stanford to finish his degree, but Stanford refused to enroll him because they wanted him as a professor instead. 

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2 hours ago, maggiemae said:

IMO Randall has always thought he was now the patriarch of the family after Jack died. And he was not.

Because Rebecca encouraged him to feel that way, and that was wrong.

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Why are ppl saying it seemed like Kevin and Randall were not getting along in the flash-forward when Kevin had a beard? Did I miss something they seemed fine.

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I know "Miguel" is hard to top, but I think they could've done better than this filler episode so close to the end.
We have seen before Kate getting her *** together, we have seen far better (worse) fights between Randall and Kevin. Beth and Sophie even made a parody over how we've seen it all before.

Somehow I still don't see Kevin and Sophie as a long term couple no matter how much time has passed between Kate's wedding and the flash forwards. They threw it in at so late stage, I guess we were supposed to be invested more into the suspense over the identity of Kevin's wife than them actually being together.

Nobody cares, but I wonder what exactly is Elijah's remote job?

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7 hours ago, Dani-Ellie said:

For me, this was fine. I am a few years older than my brother and sister and thus learned the truth about the Tooth Fairy before they even started losing their baby teeth. Knowing the truth while they still believed was kinda fun for me. It made me feel a little more grown-up that 1) I knew the truth, and 2) my parents trusted me not to ruin the magic for my siblings.

Rebecca really didn’t have a lot of options there. The very idea of the Tooth Fairy was freaking Randall out. She had to do something to ease his mind without taking the experience away from Kate and Kevin, especially since Kevin was excited. 

I guess I should have specified kids of the same age.  The scene just came off as patronizing to me.

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The title of the episode should’ve been “The Kate Reclamation Project”. It’s quite an impressive accomplishment to go from part-time teacher’s aide to dream job of “supervisor” at a school for the blind to earning a Masters while taking care of two young children, one of whom is blind, and being asked to develop an arts curriculum for the entire state of California, all in a matter of five-ish years. Next episode she will cure Alzheimer’s and reconstitute Jack, Jurassic Park style, using DNA from his beard brush that she keeps under her pillow.

Kate’s side eye at Randall when he very accurately noted her lack of input during the family meeting is quite rich considering she had to consult with her ex-husband on what to do. And then at the end, she will quite literally be the one child who will be least involved in Rebecca’s care. Kevin will be living there full time, and Randall can drive up to the Poconos on his weekend trips home, or during the 320 days a year that Congress doesn’t work.

Hey Jack. Man up and change a blow out by yourself big guy. We’ve all done it and you’re nothing special.

The Big Three could’ve used much more alive Nicky in their lives than memories of dead Jack. 

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29 minutes ago, Johnny Dollar said:

The title of the episode should’ve been “The Kate Reclamation Project”. It’s quite an impressive accomplishment to go from part-time teacher’s aide to dream job of “supervisor” at a school for the blind to earning a Masters while taking care of two young children, one of whom is blind, and being asked to develop an arts curriculum for the entire state of California, all in a matter of five-ish years. Next episode she will cure Alzheimer’s and reconstitute Jack, Jurassic Park style, using DNA from his beard brush that she keeps under her pillow.

She's a late bloomer.  🙄

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10 hours ago, maggiemae said:

IMO Randall has always thought he was now the patriarch of the family after Jack died. And he was not.

Rebecca took a leave of absence after Jack died, right before the three kids graduated from high school. It was the worst time of her life, and her worst time as a mother. Without direction from Rebecca, Kate stayed home aimlessly (I don't think we ever learned if she had been accepted at Berklee) while she ate her grief; Kevin followed Sophie to New York and then married her, while he became an alcoholic, and Randall gave up going to Howard, while he came home every weekend to look in on his mother, as his siblings self-destructed. 

Rebecca leaned on a grieving boy with lifelong, acknowledged, anxiety and abandonment issues -- but no treatment, ever. Meanwhile he was negotiating his freshman year at an excellent college (with a Black student body of less than 3%), on his own. All Randall had to fall back on were his coping mechanisms of over-thinking and taking control, and for a time, Rebecca took advantage of them. 

She learned. Her three kids were turning 36 when the show began: exactly twice 18 years old. How Rebecca continued to develop as a mother over their first 18 years and then again, 18 years later, is a quietly heroic story. For me, that's the magic.

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On 5/10/2022 at 10:45 PM, Mrs Shibbles said:

Toby looked like he put a little weight back on.

Also, still no Kate in the flash forward?  Maybe she is off earning her second PhD.

Probably busy designing an art curriculum for the entire universe! Little space dudes like art and music too not to mention Pearson speeches 😂

bailar-moves.gif

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12 hours ago, Rootbeer said:

The cabin is someplace in the Poconos, which is about 100 miles from Philly and 220 or so from DC; so a reasonable drive for Randall and family.

As for Elijah and Madison, I got the impression that they were planning to move someplace in the Poconos or even to the old cabin.  We didn't hear where Elijah's family was from in NJ, but if they were in Alpine, where Randall and Beth used to reside, they'd be about 120 miles away.

So, Kate would be the only one who would need to fly to see Rebecca and probably wouldn't be able to swing a quick weekend visit too often.

Of course with kates magical life she will be able to take as much time off as needed and will be able to take a private jet back ans forth seamlessly , with no ill affect on her new important job and her magical marriGe .

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6 hours ago, Marley said:

Why are ppl saying it seemed like Kevin and Randall were not getting along in the flash-forward when Kevin had a beard? Did I miss something they seemed fine.

Weren't they fighting in the present-day when we first saw that flash forward? Probably just making interpretations of their behavior toward each other based on what was happening else-when.

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Yes, in the flash-forward at the cabin they are somber together, but seem fraternal in each other's presence. Toby, too, looks like someone taking stock as he waits for The Call while alone in a hotel room near his ex-mother-in-law's house, where he's been called to her deathbed: no more and no less than that.

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1 hour ago, Johnny Dollar said:

The title of the episode should’ve been “The Kate Reclamation Project”. It’s quite an impressive accomplishment to go from part-time teacher’s aide to dream job of “supervisor” at a school for the blind to earning a Masters while taking care of two young children, one of whom is blind, and being asked to develop an arts curriculum for the entire state of California, all in a matter of five-ish years. Next episode she will cure Alzheimer’s and reconstitute Jack, Jurassic Park style, using DNA from his beard brush that she keeps under her pillow.

Kate’s side eye at Randall when he very accurately noted her lack of input during the family meeting is quite rich considering she had to consult with her ex-husband on what to do. And then at the end, she will quite literally be the one child who will be least involved in Rebecca’s care. Kevin will be living there full time, and Randall can drive up to the Poconos on his weekend trips home, or during the 320 days a year that Congress doesn’t work.

Hey Jack. Man up and change a blow out by yourself big guy. We’ve all done it and you’re nothing special.

The Big Three could’ve used much more alive Nicky in their lives than memories of dead Jack. 

Not to mentions kates ability to attract a man and immediately rebound from one marriage to another and overnight change this mans personality, have a dream second wedding , etc

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1 minute ago, nlkm9 said:

Not to mentions kates ability to attract a man and immediately rebound from one marriage to another and overnight change this mans personality, have a dream second wedding , etc

The show compressed 5 years into one episode, so it may look like Kate and Philip hooked up as soon as the ink was dry on her divorce papers.  Philip did take Kate out to karaoke on the day those papers were signed, but as friends.  That happened sometime in 2023.  Kate and Philip's first date was at the Mexican restaurant sometime after that.  It could have been six months later or a year later.  Kate and Philip get married sometime in 2026 before her and Kevin's birthday at the end of August. 

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8 hours ago, Marley said:

Why are ppl saying it seemed like Kevin and Randall were not getting along in the flash-forward when Kevin had a beard? Did I miss something they seemed fine.

Yeah, I thought it showed the opposite! They had the terrible fight in present day, and then it showed the future where we’re sort of wondering if they’re still estranged. Then Kevin puts his hand on Randall’s shoulder which seemed to be the show’s way of saying that they weren’t estranged at all. At least that’s how I interpreted it.

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(edited)
12 hours ago, Blackie said:

 

All the scenes of her looking after babies, I think a baby doll would have been more appropriate, it maybe would have tapped into some deep memories.

But about the robotic kitty, have you seen the ads for it? They are hilarious!!  But still I want one, but I am waiting for a Japanese made model.

Mr Blackie walked in and said what is your show about. "3siblings and their mother with dementia, do you want to watch it".  No comment, he just lived it.....

When Kevin phoned Randal did he say get the girls and Beth, or get the girls together? I can't remember if we see Beth is the fast forward scenes. 

In the last 2 episodes I wouldn't mind seeing something about Randall's girls lives since they have been on the show since nearly the start.  I do not want to see another future Jack episode and if that if what it is I will take a pass.

Small voice.

Someone gave me a robotic cat for Christmas. It does give me a little comfort since I am not allowed to have cats at the place where I currently live.

11 hours ago, Shermie said:

Misery?

The key to avoiding “move ins” is to not have extra rooms. If you have guest rooms, you’re gonna have guests.

Believe me, some people will take a couch or sleeping bag on the floor.

In fact, couch surfing is a thing.

Edited by qtpye
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2 hours ago, Johnny Dollar said:

Did anyone else notice that Rebecca’s aide referred to her as “Mrs Pearson”? One final indignity for poor Miguel. 

 

I know with my Dad's Alz regression, we called him Dad until he no longer responded to it.

Then we called him Bob because that is what my Mom called him.

Then we call him Robert because that is what his own Mother called him.

So maybe not a slight to Miguel, just using the language that Rebecca would respond to at that given moment in the disease.

 

 

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11 hours ago, HelloooKitty said:

Bearded Kevin is prettiest Kevin. 
 

that is all. 

I know Kevin has always been considered handsome, but he never appealed to me... until Bearded Kevin appeared.

 

12 hours ago, Aloeonatable said:

Agree. Not sure why she would be considered "magical." 

Because she's their mother. They all went thru traumatic events, and Rebecca was there to support and help. One can say, "Yeah well mothers are supposed to do that," but this is what they experienced. In their eyes she's magical.

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(edited)
17 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

I just find it so bizarre how rushed so much of this season has been. Its been six seasons, the show could have kept going for another season or two at least, they knew that this was the endgame, the show chose to end now, why does it feel like the frantic scrabble you get when a show's been suddenly cancelled, especially with Kate's divorce, marriage, and career, she totally changed her life in about three episodes. 

I know that this show has never nailed pacing (how much time can we spend watching Randall's bio mom sell veggies or Deja engage in awkward teen flirting) but come on, I feel like Kate's getting cliff notes. 

I wonder if the very fast pace of season 6 has to do with Randall's speech about "time moving fast". We also saw Miguel tell Randall at the wedding, "it's moving to fast" Randall: "what is?" Miguel "all of it". And next week the nurse tells Kevin and Randall "it's going to go fast now", or something along those lines. Just the speed of time as one ages compared to being a child. I definitely can relate! 

 

Edited by Violetgoblin6
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(edited)
45 minutes ago, peeayebee said:

I know Kevin has always been considered handsome, but he never appealed to me... until Bearded Kevin appeared.

This was me with Ben Affleck.  All those years of Hollywood trying to make him a leading man and I just didn't get it.  Then I saw him in Gone Girl and I finally saw the light. 

Oh wait,  This is Us....hmm....I have a LOT (unfortunately) of experience with dementia and alzheimers and agree this portrayal is not typical of anything I've seen.  But, as someone else mentioned,  I don't think showing her yelling, hitting, losing her temper,  falling out of bed, etc. would be how people want to see Rebecca's end of life, this portrayal is sad enough.

Edited by mansonlamps
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I know these are characters in a tv show, but did none of the Pearsons consider consulting with a doctor before deciding all these life changes for Rebecca?? Just getting new furniture can be stressful enough on a patient with Alzheimer's and moving them to a new home can cause a rapid decline. Kevin seemed to be the only one clued in that keeping her in her home where she had a routine and felt safe would be the best thing for her.  Randall wanted to play family savior and didn't consider some of the real life issues they would need to sort out in order to have her move in with them, and Kate didn't really consider that a move across the country is unbelievably stressful even for a fully functioning adult who is aware of what is going on. I mean Rebecca doesn't even know who the hell Phillip is so it would be a little frightening for her to see him every day in the unfamiliar house that she's found herself living in. And how were they even planning on getting her to LA? A six hour flight, even if on a private jet, would be incredibly difficult for her at that stage and a several day road trip would hellish. Were they just planning on giving her patented Pearson inspirational speeches to calm her down the whole way?   

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I was out of town for a few days and unable to watch until late last night and show got me again. I think some of that is just seeing my MIL in Rebecca as she has Alzheimer's and my own mother getting older and seeing her decline a bit. You're just never, ever ready for any of this.

The opening montage with Rebecca caring for the kids and showcasing that strong mother's love as she dealt with the wee hours of the morning incidents was so touching. And WTAF Jack to never getting his ass out of bed to spell his exhausted wife?

Those scenes with baby Kate and LOL to them watching Knot's Landing together and Rebecca falling asleep sitting straight up as one does when running on less than fumes is so true to life. Her waking up to Kate screaming from falling on the floor and her panic was so real as was her keeping vigil by Kate's crib that night.

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That scene being tied to Kate reading to Rebecca. That age-old shift from being parented by your parents to parenting them.

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Kate smiling at her mother the next morning to give her the reassurance that "I'm okay, Mommy" was sweet relief.

Later, Kate bemoaning being behind her brothers in everything, including losing teeth. Showing the origins of Kate feeling lost in her brothers' shadow, through present-day. We see further evidence of this with Kate being infantilized a little bit while Randall gets let in on the Tooth Fairy secret. But that also came with Randall feeling more of the burden of responsibility and the need to control everything while Kate and Kevin, to a lesser extent, felt inferior.

Rebecca did smooth things over a little bit by reassuring Kate she would catch up and then some and young Kate was just the cutest when she said, "Well, maybe with Kevin."

Fast-forward to the teenage years with Randall punching out a guy who was trying to take advantage of a drunk, vulnerable Kate, which I don't advocate violence, but an exception and a point for you, Randall. Kate feeling like she was a "dud" and clearly being eclipsed by her brothers. She cannot know, of course, that Rebecca takes Kevin to task for his drunken messiness and basically tells him to grow up.

The present-day scenes with Kevin and Randall having a pissing contest over what to do with Rebecca with Miguel recently passed and seeing how even though Kate was in the room, she might as well have been invisible, resonated with me. Beth and Sophie were spot-on in their imitation of their spouses. The impressions, words, tone, cadence, body language - all of it was perfection. Poor Phillip, who doesn't have the history and baggage, tries to interject and I love that the women shut him down, although nicely. Beth made me laugh so hard when she talked about having 30 years with this family and she has to hole up and blow off steam what with all the Pearson feelings and speeches and grand gestures like letting people (cough-William-cough) move in. Then she softens, saying being part of this family is both the greatest burden and the greatest blessing in her life, which Sophie seconds. It's a bonding moment for the in-laws.

Rebecca asking about Miguel and it not clicking that he is gone is absolutely true to real-life scenarios. It's just heartbreaking to watch and rather than tell her the truth - that he is dead - they say he's somewhere else. 

The bickering back and forth between the brothers and of, course, Randall wants Rebecca to move in with him and the family in Philadelphia and Kevin calling out, quite correctly, that with his role as senator, he's not going to be there that much for his mother (and what isn't said is that the heavy lifting will be left to Beth). Kevin is also delusional if he thinks dropping in a few times a month to the cabin is a long-term solution.

Kate wisely removes herself from that heated discussion to take her mom for a walk. The brothers comment that Rebecca is no longer the woman she once was and that was another moment for me, particularly as we see that moment juxtaposed with Kate and Rebecca having a walk outside. 

I loved the phone call/pep talk with Toby. I love seeing that they are on good terms, that he is dating Laura, and that they have a healthy co-parenting relationship. He has the perspective Phillip is only now starting to gain with respect to the steamrolling that is Randall and Kevin. He urges her not to revert to the lesser version of herself (being the background to her brothers' foreground) as Rebecca chose her for a reason. She knew Randall and Kevin would do what they often do - fight over who knows better and Kate could be trusted to be neutral. We also learn that Kate has gotten her master's degree and is helping to design an arts curriculum for California. I'm sure many eyes rolled during this scene, but mine did not. It's been several years since she got the promo and given that she persevered with final getting her undergrad degree, I don't find it that far-fetched that she would have gotten her masters' and I (at a table for one, probably) am happy to see Kate growing her education, skills, and career as a whole. 

Randall trying to get Beth on his side about his plans for Rebecca and Beth shutting him down by reminding him that Kevin is not the irresponsible chucklefuck he used to be nor Kate the passive, overwhelmed person she used to be. When she said, "you keep thinking about Kate and Kevin as who they used to be instead of who they are," I cheered.

Kate, finally ready to address her brothers on equal footing, calls them out on the fact that neither of them really looks or sees or touches their mother anymore, not wanting to face what she has, their mother is in serious decline. 

And here come the tears as she takes them into the bedroom and has Randall brush her hair (and shut up about having daughters and knowing about hair, Randall, and just listen to your sister) and has Kevin apply lotion to her hands. Rebecca enjoying the sensation, tilting her head back, closing her eyes, and smiling. It was a powerful, powerful scene.

Though she is not their mother as the "magic" she once was, she is still here, still their mom, and very much in need of them and their love.

We hear Kate's plan - to move Rebecca in with them or in a memory care facility, and for once, both brothers hear her out.

Then come more tears as Kevin shares The Manny is ending, his new adventure, Big 3 Homes is obviously based on the East Coast, and he and Sophie are going to move into the dream cabin with Rebecca. Sophie clearly has no fondness for Los Angeles and confirms she is onboard.

Kate questioning Kevin being that far away from the twins and Madison responding, "He won't." OMG, that really got me in the feels. Learning that Madison and Elijah have grown to love the area and Elijah's family will be much closer in NJ and will be moving east as well. Wow. You got me over and over again, show.

Nicky and Edie will be close by as well and offering to help - I mean, that is really the epitome of family, isn't it?

Kate's comment about the significance of she, Kevin, and Randall being a trio and it somehow being a bit fated, given where they are now, and she agrees to Kevin's proposal. That flashback to Rebecca and Jack learning she is pregnant and obviously before they knew it would be 3 vs 1 baby.

We opened with a montage, we close with a montage, and nobody does it better than this show. We hear the "To Build a Home" song that we heard when the night of the fire as well as the first flash-forward at the dream house. We see Sophie and Kevin settling in with Rebecca, Randall and Kate visiting, the extended family with Madison and Elijah. We see the passage of time and Kevin growing the beard and getting more gray. And all the while, the sand in the hourglass keeps trickling away.

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Then the moment I and they have been dreading - Kevin's phone call, summoning them to the home because Rebecca is nearing the end.

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I am so not ready for the final two episodes, next week's especially.

Now, off to read this thread.

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9 minutes ago, sashabear21 said:

I know these are characters in a tv show, but did none of the Pearsons consider consulting with a doctor before deciding all these life changes for Rebecca?? Just getting new furniture can be stressful enough on a patient with Alzheimer's and moving them to a new home can cause a rapid decline. Kevin seemed to be the only one clued in that keeping her in her home where she had a routine and felt safe would be the best thing for her.  Randall wanted to play family savior and didn't consider some of the real life issues they would need to sort out in order to have her move in with them, and Kate didn't really consider that a move across the country is unbelievably stressful even for a fully functioning adult who is aware of what is going on. I mean Rebecca doesn't even know who the hell Phillip is so it would be a little frightening for her to see him every day in the unfamiliar house that she's found herself living in. And how were they even planning on getting her to LA? A six hour flight, even if on a private jet, would be incredibly difficult for her at that stage and a several day road trip would hellish. Were they just planning on giving her patented Pearson inspirational speeches to calm her down the whole way?   

I found it pretty realistic that none of the plans put forth by the Big 3 were perfect, and that some of them required huge sacrifices on the part of each particular child and could potentially cause harm to Rebecca.  This is what families face when the children are scattered around the country with families and responsibilities of their own and mom or dad needs extra care. Sometimes there is no right answer.  You compromise and come up with the solution your finances and life allows. The Pearsons are lucky that money is no object when it comes to Rebecca's care.

Kate knew she could not move across the country to take care of Rebecca with two young children at home, she was also not going to ask Kevin to give up time with his kids to move.  And Randall took an oath and deserves to see that through.  They also really needed to involve the spouses instead of just the three of them.  They probably could have crafted a better option than what either Randall or Kate put forth.  An option that involved a bit of sacrifice from all of them to have someone in the house with Rebecca full-time.  Because as soon as the spouses got involved, the family was able to reach a satisfactory solution to Rebecca's care.  

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Maybe I missed this… but why oh why were they just then deciding on a contingency plan for a post-Miguel situation? It didn’t seem like he died suddenly, so why wouldn’t they have figured out Rebecca’s care plan like during his illness? 

Also I enjoyed the dialogue in the “meeting”. 
Kate: Philip and I talked last night and Mom can move in with us. 
Kevin: Well, Sophie and I were also up talking… 

Maybe it’s just me, but it sounded like Kevin was one-upping her. Whoever talks to their significant other more and longer wins! 

Also I think Philip instead of Toby pointing out to Kate that she’s accomplished (lol sure) and can stand up to her brothers would have gone a long way to show how he supports her. I currently just think their relationship is dumb. And it made no sense to have the ex husband point that out. 

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1 hour ago, peeayebee said:

Because she's their mother. They all went thru traumatic events, and Rebecca was there to support and help. One can say, "Yeah well mothers are supposed to do that," but this is what they experienced. In their eyes she's magical.

My exact thoughts, as well, and beautifully said.

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6 hours ago, Blackie said:

I'm with others that think either Rebecca's dementia went on too long

No, it can drag on for years and years and years. In fact, I just read a study that said once Alzheimer’s has taken full force, the person can live on for years because they have no stresses (stress is the number one killer, really) since each day is a new day with no worries. Alzheimer’s patients might seemed stressed but they forget almost everything the minute its out of their brain. So they can carry on for many years in their stress-free la-la land.

39 minutes ago, hoosiergirl said:

Maybe I missed this… but why oh why were they just then deciding on a contingency plan for a post-Miguel situation? It didn’t seem like he died suddenly, so why wouldn’t they have figured out Rebecca’s care plan like during his illness? 

Yeah, they should have had something planned, surprised they didn’t. But I’ve seen so many elderly people make zero plans for their future regarding where to live, transportation, care, etc. They have a “we’ll deal with issues when they come up”, but then it’s way too late. Wait lists for seniors housing, nursing homes, home care, etc. Unless you’re loaded, navigating the elderly years can be very problematic. 

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I was bothered by Kevin and Randall when they were saying 'that is not our mother' and something about taking care of what is left of her.  

I do not know how many years since she had been diagnosed but it had been several.    I don't understand how they could say things like that, when they have been watching her decline for years.  

Maybe others  don't see it like that but someone suffering from dementia, is still that person. They are sick.  It is hard and heart breaking to watch but  to me they sounded so cold. 'That is not our mother'.  Yes it is.   

 Typical Pearsons, they are thinking of how it is for them . But Rebecca is who she is, and  yes, the disease robs her of so much and them too. But any illness takes things away.   

I don't really know if i can put it into words but  I feel like , as adults who have watched the progression for years, that by this point they should know and be more accepting that this is  Mom now , and you care for her and love her for who and want she is now, just as you would any one who was ill.   You can hate the disease and wish things were different but it is their reality. 

And Kate's interaction with them helped.    Getting them to look at her and see her for who she is now, instead of always thinking about how she used to be.    I guess i thought it was a little late in the game for this epiphany though.  

Oh, less serious, but  i love how they just through out these tidbits to explain stuff to us.  Oh, Kate  got her master's and is now designing curriculum.  Take that all you naysayers who wonder how Kate and Phillip can afford to live in LA on   their salaries.  No explaination on how  she managed to do that, with a full time job and 2 kids, one with special needs.  Oh, except that she was a late bloomer.  lol  

Well this show,  I hate it but  I am seeing it through to the end.  I find the Big 3 insufferable.  But still,  they can get me.  I am NOT crying!  This show is to stupid and annoying.   Nope, my throat is not tight and eyes are not filling with tears.  I watch it alone so  there is no proof  that this show has brought me to tears.  lol  

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On 5/11/2022 at 12:06 AM, LexieLily said:

Are we sure it was a permission slip form? The way he made sure to slide that in when Rebecca was half-asleep still, I was sure it was a detention slip or something. 

Randall and detention are two words that don't belong in the same sentence.

Although I'm sure many a teacher wanted to send him to detention for being, well, Randall.

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I'm not following the thinking that Kate let Kevin take over and make the decision. I didn't see it that way at all.

Rebecca wanted to stay in Jack's dream house that Kevin built and wanted to be near family but not at the expense of her kids' lives.

Kevin and Sophie came up with a plan to do exactly that now that he was ready to move on from acting and be invested in his East Coast business (Big 3 Homes), with an assist from Madison and Elijah moving East.

I see the latter as less plot-driven and more as a logical move with Madison having no family in California besides the twins and Elijah, Elijah being WFH and having family nearby. and without sacrificing their lives, including Kevin losing time with his kids.

Why wouldn't Kate have agreed to this? If she hadn't and insisted on Rebecca moving in with her and Phillip or going into a memory care facility when Kevin was very willing to make this move, there would be criticism of her for being short-sighted. 

Also, all the discussion about Kate and her master's degree and planning curriculum is amusing to me. In that, if Randall can be a US senator with next to no government/political experience and Kevin can be a fairly famous/successful actor not coming from NYC or LA and being reared to that career from an early age, then Kate can accomplish what she is said to have accomplished. 

Finally, I appreciated the conversation between Toby and Kate as he can give an informed, but neutral perspective on the situation. How refreshing to see a divorced couple that aren't at each other's throats as is the typical TV trope.

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(edited)
20 hours ago, Shermie said:

No, it can drag on for years and years and years. In fact, I just read a study that said once Alzheimer’s has taken full force, the person can live on for years because they have no stresses (stress is the number one killer, really) since each day is a new day with no worries. Alzheimer’s patients might seemed stressed but they forget almost everything the minute its out of their brain. So they can carry on for many years in their stress-free la-la land.

Having just been all the way through this process, I can attest to the fact that it can take a really long time. My mother started having obvious cognitive decline at least 15 years before she died and she was pretty far into it for nearly a decade. And she was not a joy to manage or take care of. I'm just as happy they aren't showing that part in TIU because I couldn't handle it after having been through it IRL.

Edited by BC4ME
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On 5/11/2022 at 6:39 AM, circumvent said:

Why would it be surprising? There is nothing in her story that negates this possibility. We don't see all the steps of the time jump. 

I will not quote because more than one person made the same comment about how fast Kate got her degrees, taking are of two kids and working. I know someone who got her degrees after divorcing, taking care of two kids and working full time. It is not impossible, but it can happen. 

For more context, in prisons that have programs that allow inmates to get college degrees, the ones who are allowed to join do dedicate themselves. They do this while in prison, no privacy, not special time for reading and writing, they still have to work whatever job they have in the prison grounds, and some of them graduate Summa cum laude. Real stories and those were in a way less advantage place than Kate. Maybe most here don't like Kate, but her story is not an impossible dream. For more on the prisoners stories, it is on the book Our Class, by Chris Hedges, and he speaks of those students often in interviews (he was the one teaching them in prison)

I have many, many friends and acquaintances who have done the same (getting a degree while caring for young kids, some SAH parents, some with a part-time or full-time job, some with, some without a spouse). Kate is not a unicorn here but I can agree that if one dislikes Kate, then they are going to view this differently, despite that the degree and the current job is several years in the making and completely in the realm of possibility.

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