S05.E16: The Adirondacks

[ShadowFacts]

1 hour ago, kili said:

In other news, Rebecca moved to LA to help out with baby Jack. Maybe she could help solve the problem of the two working parents. I was kind of surprised that was never considered as an option. It was the goto solution Randall had to solve his exact same problem (when he got elected in another state) - but Rebecca was moving to LA.

Rebecca having Alzheimer's wasn't known yet at the time she moved.  She could help Kate and Toby, but only with somebody else with her, her diagnosis doesn't lend itself to caring for a newborn and a special needs toddler alone.  Who's to say Miguel would be up for that in retirement, even as much as he seems to love being a grandfather and is very helpful.  It's a lot having that responsibility at his age even without Rebecca's health situation. As far as her inappropriate behavior at the non-wedding, and I agree it was out of bounds, it could be typical for her, or the poor judgment could be an indication of cognitive decline.  These Pearsons love their drama so it's hard to tell.

[kili]

Quote

 Who's to say Miguel would be up for that in retirement, even as much as he seems to love being a grandfather and is very helpful.  It's a lot having that responsibility at his age even without Rebecca's health situation

They do seem to come as a team. When Randall asked them to babysit, he asked both. They moved to California to help Kate with Jack. 

Kate could at least consider asking. She doesn't know, but we and Beth know, that Rebecca is feeling not normal because neither Kate nor Kevin are asking her to help with the kids.

Quote

As far as her inappropriate behavior at the non-wedding, and I agree it was out of bounds, it could be typical for her, or the poor judgment could be an indication of cognitive decline.  

Given how she never went to a filming of Kevin's show and the way she behaved when he was a guest on the show, I'm thinking it is just typical behaviour for Rebecca. It's rare for Rebecca to give Kevin attention if she feels her other children need attention.

[izabella]

On 5/31/2021 at 12:16 PM, debraran said:

But why redo things? With all the ways to love someone why reuse Princess Bride. For 5 years it was Sophie’s and Kevins thing. 

Was it?  I thought the movie thing was making up endings to Good Will Hunting because they didn't see the ending of it for some reasons whenever it was that they tried watching it.  So they would call each other for years with their guesses and imaginary endings.

I don't remember Princess Bride being a Kevin/Sophie thing. 

[debraran]

26 minutes ago, izabella said:

Was it?  I thought the movie thing was making up endings to Good Will Hunting because they didn't see the ending of it for some reasons whenever it was that they tried watching it.  So they would call each other for years with their guesses and imaginary endings.

I don't remember Princess Bride being a Kevin/Sophie thing. 

There were many references and a princess bride party Kevin had instead of some thing else because of Sophie to start it off.  It was their thing as children and private jokes. That’s why I was shocked TIU had him doing something from it at Madison’s wedding but then he wasn’t.  It was Kates. 

Edited June 2, 2021 by debraran

[Dreamboat Annie]

Okay.  So I did something last night I have never done.  I re-watched some of an episode of This is Us.  This episode.  Kevin's wedding speech parts in particular.  Sans any gummies whatsoever if anyone is wondering, lol.  What I noticed and my opinions.

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the beginning of the episode:

 

Kevin exhales a deep breath through his nose and says rather seriously "Wow.  First of all, you look absolutely beautiful".  More deep breaths.  Then "There's so many things I want to say to you today".  

Then "I guess I'll just start with the most important one:  Mawage...".  He then says "I can't do that - obviously".  Obviously.  After some hemming and hawing, he says "could get a laugh though".  Then right after that, he's much more confident about using it, and happily says "right, it's gonna kill, it's gonna absolutely kill".  

 

-  The first things he says are not said in a way a brother would think of saying them to his sister on her wedding day.

-  There's a door to his left (he's looking in a mirror) in the bathroom.

-  He obviously can't do that. 

-  He is rifling through papers.  Seems a bit nervous for a wedding that's not his own, and for someone used to the spotlight.

-  His hair is parted with his bangs combed to his left side. 

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the end of the episode.

 

Kevin says "Yep, that's the one.  People are going to love it!".  

 

- No door to his left in the bathroom unless he's standing somewhere else by then.

-  His hair, while still parted to the left, does not look quite the same and looks like a different hairstyle to me, and longer than in the first one.

-  No papers he could "rifle through" this time, only one small paper (Big Three Homes) folded in half.

-  When he sees Kate, he tells her she looks beautiful in a way that a brother would totally say it.

-  Kevin is so much more relaxed now because it's not his wedding.

 

At the very end of the first speech "rehearsal", the lighting slightly changes (could be my TV lol) and Kevin is much more relaxed when he says "it's absolutely gonna kill", and his hair looks more like it does at the end.  Then, in the one at the end, when he has become much more confident using "Mawage...", and says "that's the one, people are gonna love it" and it really does look like he is saying that on the heels of what he said at the end of the first one.

 

So, we were lead to believe at first that Kevin at the beginning was rehearsing his speech for his later called off wedding.  Then, at the end, we learn he wasn't - he was rehearsing all along for Kate's second wedding.  I say those were not the same wedding at all.  The first one near the beginning was not Kate's wedding - it was Kevin's.  And not for the wedding Madison just called off.  One that happens after that but before Kate's.  When Madison arrived at Kevin's hotel room to call off the wedding, Kevin wasn't dressed for the wedding yet.  

[debraran]

1 hour ago, Dreamboat Annie said:

Okay.  So I did something last night I have never done.  I re-watched some of an episode of This is Us.  This episode.  Kevin's wedding speech parts in particular.  Sans any gummies whatsoever if anyone is wondering, lol.  What I noticed and my opinions.

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the beginning of the episode:

 

Kevin exhales a deep breath through his nose and says rather seriously "Wow.  First of all, you look absolutely beautiful".  More deep breaths.  Then "There's so many things I want to say to you today".  

Then "I guess I'll just start with the most important one:  Mawage...".  He then says "I can't do that - obviously".  Obviously.  After some hemming and hawing, he says "could get a laugh though".  Then right after that, he's much more confident about using it, and happily says "right, it's gonna kill, it's gonna absolutely kill".  

You are right, the first speech was not suitable for a sister, especially a second wedding and the rest.

 

-  The first things he says are not said in a way a brother would think of saying them to his sister on her wedding day.

-  There's a door to his left (he's looking in a mirror) in the bathroom.

-  He obviously can't do that. 

-  He is rifling through papers.  Seems a bit nervous for a wedding that's not his own, and for someone used to the spotlight.

-  His hair is parted with his bangs combed to his left side. 

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the end of the episode.

 

Kevin says "Yep, that's the one.  People are going to love it!".  

 

- No door to his left in the bathroom unless he's standing somewhere else by then.

-  His hair, while still parted to the left, does not look quite the same and looks like a different hairstyle to me, and longer than in the first one.

-  No papers he could "rifle through" this time, only one small paper (Big Three Homes) folded in half.

-  When he sees Kate, he tells her she looks beautiful in a way that a brother would totally say it.

-  Kevin is so much more relaxed now because it's not his wedding.

 

At the very end of the first speech "rehearsal", the lighting slightly changes (could be my TV lol) and Kevin is much more relaxed when he says "it's absolutely gonna kill", and his hair looks more like it does at the end.  Then, in the one at the end, when he has become much more confident using "Mawage...", and says "that's the one, people are gonna love it" and it really does look like he is saying that on the heels of what he said at the end of the first one.

 

So, we were lead to believe at first that Kevin at the beginning was rehearsing his speech for his later called off wedding.  Then, at the end, we learn he wasn't - he was rehearsing all along for Kate's second wedding.  I say those were not the same wedding at all.  The first one near the beginning was not Kate's wedding - it was Kevin's.  And not for the wedding Madison just called off.  One that happens after that but before Kate's.  When Madison arrived at Kevin's hotel room to call off the wedding, Kevin wasn't dressed for the wedding yet.  

So I'm a little tired so please correct me, you think that was for Sophie's wedding and his and they had Kate's included too to throw us off?  I did notice not everything seemed to match up but not hair etc. Sometimes they film things in multiple takes. I know he never dressed for Madison which was why the end stuck out more when he was in the suit. She pointed that out. I can never see Dan using anything from Princess Bride with anyone but Sophie or maybe Kate. It was just too long with them and first time he said "I love her" to his mom and dad was during he Princess Bride party. He said he couldn't tell her to go to Kate's Madonna party because he loved her. (he was adorable)

 

Edited June 2, 2021 by debraran

[Dreamboat Annie]

7 minutes ago, debraran said:

So I'm a little tired so please correct me, you think that was for Sophie's wedding and his and they had Kate's included too to throw us off?  I did notice not everything seemed to match up but not hair etc. Sometimes they film things in multiple takes. I know he never dressed for Madison which was why the end stuck out more when he was in the suit. She pointed that out. I can never see Dan using anything from Princess Bride with anyone but Sophie or maybe Kate. It was just too long with them and first time he said "I love her" to his mom and dad was during he Princess Bride party. He said he couldn't tell her to go to Kate's Madonna party because he loved her. (he was adorable)

 

 

I think the first one was for Kevin's future wedding, to whom I can't say, and they had Kate's included too to throw us off, yes.  I know Madison pointed out that he wasn't dressed, so we knew right then that at the beginning of the ep he wasn't rehearsing for the called off wedding .  I agree that he obviously couldn't use The Princess Bride reference at his own wedding unless it was to Sophie, but that could also be to throw us off.  

[CrystalBlue]

1 hour ago, Dreamboat Annie said:

Okay.  So I did something last night I have never done.  I re-watched some of an episode of This is Us.  This episode.  Kevin's wedding speech parts in particular.  Sans any gummies whatsoever if anyone is wondering, lol.  What I noticed and my opinions.

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the beginning of the episode:

 

Kevin exhales a deep breath through his nose and says rather seriously "Wow.  First of all, you look absolutely beautiful".  More deep breaths.  Then "There's so many things I want to say to you today".  

Then "I guess I'll just start with the most important one:  Mawage...".  He then says "I can't do that - obviously".  Obviously.  After some hemming and hawing, he says "could get a laugh though".  Then right after that, he's much more confident about using it, and happily says "right, it's gonna kill, it's gonna absolutely kill".  

 

-  The first things he says are not said in a way a brother would think of saying them to his sister on her wedding day.

-  There's a door to his left (he's looking in a mirror) in the bathroom.

-  He obviously can't do that. 

-  He is rifling through papers.  Seems a bit nervous for a wedding that's not his own, and for someone used to the spotlight.

-  His hair is parted with his bangs combed to his left side. 

 

Kevin rehearsing in front of the mirror at the end of the episode.

 

Kevin says "Yep, that's the one.  People are going to love it!".  

 

- No door to his left in the bathroom unless he's standing somewhere else by then.

-  His hair, while still parted to the left, does not look quite the same and looks like a different hairstyle to me, and longer than in the first one.

-  No papers he could "rifle through" this time, only one small paper (Big Three Homes) folded in half.

-  When he sees Kate, he tells her she looks beautiful in a way that a brother would totally say it.

-  Kevin is so much more relaxed now because it's not his wedding.

 

At the very end of the first speech "rehearsal", the lighting slightly changes (could be my TV lol) and Kevin is much more relaxed when he says "it's absolutely gonna kill", and his hair looks more like it does at the end.  Then, in the one at the end, when he has become much more confident using "Mawage...", and says "that's the one, people are gonna love it" and it really does look like he is saying that on the heels of what he said at the end of the first one.

 

So, we were lead to believe at first that Kevin at the beginning was rehearsing his speech for his later called off wedding.  Then, at the end, we learn he wasn't - he was rehearsing all along for Kate's second wedding.  I say those were not the same wedding at all.  The first one near the beginning was not Kate's wedding - it was Kevin's.  And not for the wedding Madison just called off.  One that happens after that but before Kate's.  When Madison arrived at Kevin's hotel room to call off the wedding, Kevin wasn't dressed for the wedding yet.  

That's very observant of you and valuable information.  I will rewatch again for sure.  I wish my gummies were as good as yours.

[Dreamboat Annie]

2 hours ago, CrystalBlue said:

That's very observant of you and valuable information.  I will rewatch again for sure.  I wish my gummies were as good as yours.

Aww, thank you!  But time will tell whether it's valuable information or a load of nonsense.  Whenever I think I might be onto something, this show is very good at proving me wrong. 😠

LOL I'm sure your gummies are just as great!  I haven't had any of mine yet this week but I'm looking forward to rewatching at least those parts again when I do. 😄

[TivoFan]

On 5/30/2021 at 4:18 AM, Diana Berry said:

 

If Kevin was going to end up with Sophie I think they would have eased her more into this season.  I have no doubt Kevin will find out her drama, though ( why did she change her number).

 

I immediately thought it was because her husband(?) might have been abusive.

[DebbieM4]

On 5/26/2021 at 4:57 PM, MissLucas said:

Okay I might be a dinosaur but I can't let this go: If you did not want someone to delete a tape you'd simply remove the little latch on the front-side. The only way to tape over then was to cover it with a bit of sticky tape - which would have been a major jerk move. (I did check - the latch was still there).

SO THIS WAS ON YOU REBECCA!

*off to chase some kids from my lawn*

I thought the same thing.  She should have removed that little tab.  

And also: Were we supposed to believe this was the first time the kids ever saw Rebecca & Jack arguing?  That’s very unrealistic, even for this show. And their reaction was ridiculous.

[debraran]

7 hours ago, Dreamboat Annie said:

Aww, thank you!  But time will tell whether it's valuable information or a load of nonsense.  Whenever I think I might be onto something, this show is very good at proving me wrong. 😠

LOL I'm sure your gummies are just as great!  I haven't had any of mine yet this week but I'm looking forward to rewatching at least those parts again when I do. 😄

Another thing that I thought stuck out (for me) was that the hotel room was all female in the sense Kevin except for his jacket wasn't there. Bed was blurry but you saw at least one side pulled back and a pink robe and the pink again bra on chair and a dress or robe and women's clothes in the armoire along with his dress jacket. The bathroom only had women's products and no shaving items etc or anything to show Kevin.

Maybe just a heavy handed, "hey a woman also shared this room but a bit much. Not even a robe for him or anything like that. If he didn't take jacket out of the armorie I'd think he just stopped in. (and he could have and hung it up)

Also and it's a split second, I know they film scenes in parts, but when Kevin is leaving this room, the bed in the back doesn't have the pink robe on it when obvious during the "look at Randall" magazine shot. I wish sometimes my brain didn't lock into these things because I'm not sure the writers mean for you too, but I've always liked the "what's wrong in this picture" type of things since I was a kid. ; )

Edited June 3, 2021 by debraran

[LadyIrony]

On 5/26/2021 at 1:04 PM, Quickbeam said:

I just don’t understand what the big change was to Tess’ look. It still looked pretty and feminine. It sure wasn’t non-binary after Beth got done with her. I was just lost on that point.

A case of Tess saying she wants to be treated like everyone else but then gets upset because the dress doesn't reflect who she really is it whatever! And inconsiderate of Madison as well. 

I always felt uneasy about Kevin and Madison without the baby I don't think they would be getting married.

Edited June 3, 2021 by LadyIrony

[ShadowFacts]

13 hours ago, Dreamboat Annie said:

So, we were lead to believe at first that Kevin at the beginning was rehearsing his speech for his later called off wedding.  Then, at the end, we learn he wasn't - he was rehearsing all along for Kate's second wedding.  I say those were not the same wedding at all.  The first one near the beginning was not Kate's wedding - it was Kevin's.  And not for the wedding Madison just called off.  One that happens after that but before Kate's.  When Madison arrived at Kevin's hotel room to call off the wedding, Kevin wasn't dressed for the wedding yet.  

These are super sharp observations! I'm just wondering if/why the weddings would be at the same location. Except to fool us, of course. If his perfectly crafted wedding to Madison didn't happen as we know it didn't, but he marries her in the future, would a person go to the same site for the second time? Maybe, maybe not. If he marries someone else, a new location would be probable. Besides lighting, were the bathroom and bedroom the same?

[Crs97]

5 hours ago, DebbieM4 said:

And also: Were we supposed to believe this was the first time the kids ever saw Rebecca & Jack arguing?  That’s very unrealistic, even for this show. And their reaction was ridiculous.

I have to chuckle at this because a few weeks ago husband and I argued with raised voices (well, mine was raised) and our two adult (with special needs) kids raced into the room to see if we were okay; we realized they had not heard us argue before because we usually do so pretty calmly and privately.  They didn’t make us renew our vows, though.

[MissLucas]

1 hour ago, Crs97 said:

 They didn’t make us renew our vows, though.

That's because you failed to deliver a daily Pearson speech to them!

[RedbirdNelly]

the show got me again. I thought (a) wedding was Uncle Nicky's or (b) wedding was Kevin's actual wedding. Did not expect Kate at all.

I'm torn on the bridesmaid dress. I generally agree with most posters--it's not about you; suck it up and wear it for this wedding; get out of it when the wedding is over--but I do wonder if it is more of a true issue for Tess than it would be for me. I'm straight; like dresses--so any issues with a dress are small. It seemed to mean more to her.

I love this show. I cried as usual. I also was dismayed to realize next year is the last season. I'm glad they are stopping at a set point vs driving this show into the ground for as long as they could get away with it. But I will miss it. 

[LadyIrony]

7 hours ago, ShadowFacts said:

These are super sharp observations! I'm just wondering if/why the weddings would be at the same location. Except to fool us, of course. If his perfectly crafted wedding to Madison didn't happen as we know it didn't, but he marries her in the future, would a person go to the same site for the second time? Maybe, maybe not. If he marries someone else, a new location would be probable. Besides lighting, were the bathroom and bedroom the same?

 

1 hour ago, RedbirdNelly said:

the show got me again. I thought (a) wedding was Uncle Nicky's or (b) wedding was Kevin's actual wedding. Did not expect Kate at all.

I'm torn on the bridesmaid dress. I generally agree with most posters--it's not about you; suck it up and wear it for this wedding; get out of it when the wedding is over--but I do wonder if it is more of a true issue for Tess than it would be for me. I'm straight; like dresses--so any issues with a dress are small. It seemed to mean more to her.

I love this show. I cried as usual. I also was dismayed to realize next year is the last season. I'm glad they are stopping at a set point vs driving this show into the ground for as long as they could get away with it. But I will miss it. 

I got the impression at the end that they did one of their famous time skips, this time a flash forward. So it starts off as being about Kevin's wedding but finishes up with it being Kate's wedding in the future. 

Far from an expert on the show but the This is Us Wiki states Kevin was born 1980 which makes him 40/41 years old. Whilst preparing for what is now Kate's wedding he makes a comment that he is 45 years old. 

So based on that, the writers have jumped forward 4 years at least to Kate's wedding. We also know from a previous flash forward that Toby attends a family gathering in the distant future alone. 

Regarding the dress. We all have something we don't like wearing or doing. It's called being a grown up and we realize it's just for one day. The idea is for the bridesmaid dress to be a uniform by changing it you ruin that effect and make it look like one bridesmaid is more important than the others. Fine if that is what the bride wants but not cool if the bridesmaid wants it herself. 

Especially since Madison doesn't even know her bridesmaid all that well. It is just out of courtesy and convenience that she chooses Randall's girls.

 

[CrystalBlue]

2 hours ago, RedbirdNelly said:

the show got me again. I thought (a) wedding was Uncle Nicky's or (b) wedding was Kevin's actual wedding. Did not expect Kate at all.

I'm torn on the bridesmaid dress. I generally agree with most posters--it's not about you; suck it up and wear it for this wedding; get out of it when the wedding is over--but I do wonder if it is more of a true issue for Tess than it would be for me. I'm straight; like dresses--so any issues with a dress are small. It seemed to mean more to her.

I love this show. I cried as usual. I also was dismayed to realize next year is the last season. I'm glad they are stopping at a set point vs driving this show into the ground for as long as they could get away with it. But I will miss it. 

I'm not torn on the bridesmaid dress; it was still a dress after Beth got through with it!  As has already been said by others and moi many times before, Beth was pandering to Tess because she's been on eggshells since her gay announcement and the Alex/they thing.  I wonder what Madison did to the altered dress after the non-wedding.  Does she own it herself because she bought it?  Did Beth and Randall have to pay for it themselves?

I felt for Madison in this episode and thought she made a very lovely non-bride!

Edited June 3, 2021 by CrystalBlue
Missing word.

[chocolatine]

2 hours ago, RedbirdNelly said:

I'm torn on the bridesmaid dress. I generally agree with most posters--it's not about you; suck it up and wear it for this wedding; get out of it when the wedding is over--but I do wonder if it is more of a true issue for Tess than it would be for me. I'm straight; like dresses--so any issues with a dress are small. It seemed to mean more to her.

We saw Tess wear a dress and high-heel shoes in the 2030 flash-forward. She's coming straight from her job as a social worker, so a dress is not required in that context, it's something she chooses to wear.

And like @CrystalBlue said, the end result of Beth's alterations was still a dress.

I'm with everyone who says that Tess was just being a brat and Beth should have explained to her - long before the day of the wedding - that being a bridesmaid entails wearing a dress of the bride's choosing.

[debraran]

mistake

Edited June 3, 2021 by debraran
mistake

[debraran]

On 6/3/2021 at 7:14 AM, ShadowFacts said:

These are super sharp observations! I'm just wondering if/why the weddings would be at the same location. Except to fool us, of course. If his perfectly crafted wedding to Madison didn't happen as we know it didn't, but he marries her in the future, would a person go to the same site for the second time? Maybe, maybe not. If he marries someone else, a new location would be probable. Besides lighting, were the bathroom and bedroom the same?

Before I checked out MLT on Hulu I watched the beginning and end of TIU again and Kevin doesn't say the same things in the beginning as stated. He also tells Kate she looks pretty in a casual way, not like he said it in the beginning as he more doing "vows" and seemed nervous. The only thing that throws me off that is that the suit seems the same.  Funny how the separated it and maybe thought no one would notice he wasn't doing the same speech. They are careful also to show the bathroom door to his left in the early scene  but the other shots show him differently later and more of the vanity and his paper.

Edited June 4, 2021 by debraran

[bros402]

10 hours ago, LadyIrony said:

 

I got the impression at the end that they did one of their famous time skips, this time a flash forward. So it starts off as being about Kevin's wedding but finishes up with it being Kate's wedding in the future. 

Far from an expert on the show but the This is Us Wiki states Kevin was born 1980 which makes him 40/41 years old. Whilst preparing for what is now Kate's wedding he makes a comment that he is 45 years old. 

So based on that, the writers have jumped forward 4 years at least to Kate's wedding. We also know from a previous flash forward that Toby attends a family gathering in the distant future alone. 

Regarding the dress. We all have something we don't like wearing or doing. It's called being a grown up and we realize it's just for one day. The idea is for the bridesmaid dress to be a uniform by changing it you ruin that effect and make it look like one bridesmaid is more important than the others. Fine if that is what the bride wants but not cool if the bridesmaid wants it herself. 

Especially since Madison doesn't even know her bridesmaid all that well. It is just out of courtesy and convenience that she chooses Randall's girls.

 

i think the big three were born aug 31 80

[Blakeston]

I really have to think that the writers have done a disservice to queer people with the depiction of Tess this season.

There are probably lots of viewers who don't know much about things like nonbinary identities, who are now nervous about the prospect of having a queer person in their families, because they think they'll be demonized if they occasionally get someone's pronouns wrong.

[JayDub1987]

On 5/28/2021 at 1:42 PM, JayDub1987 said:

No idea how true it is, but my teenage god-daughter informed me that "they-bey" is an acceptable (yet funny) term. Her bisexual friend is currently dating a classmate who refers to herself as a "they" and both of them use the term "they-bey." That's what I've been going with when talking about Tess and Alex(?). She could be playing me just to get me to say something stupid though lol

 

Edit:

For the record, I just realized I called "they" a "female." I'm still trying to learn how all this works and I'm just 33. Makes me feel even worse for the adults that Tess continually yells at whenever they slip up.

A follow up for anybody who really gives a crap:

I met my god-daughter's friend and her companion at my god-daughter's graduation party/cookout yesterday evening. I told them I was genuinely trying to understand and that I had been told "they-bey" was acceptable. After thanking me for trying to understand, they told me that the "they-bey" term was the right choice. Otherwise, it's "companion" or "partner" and that many teen who are gender neutral feel like those terms sound too "old."  

[MBayGal]

6 hours ago, Blakeston said:

they think they'll be demonized if they occasionally get someone's pronouns wrong.

I thought that before the Tess drama.

[bros402]

6 hours ago, JayDub1987 said:

A follow up for anybody who really gives a crap:

I met my god-daughter's friend and her companion at my god-daughter's graduation party/cookout yesterday evening. I told them I was genuinely trying to understand and that I had been told "they-bey" was acceptable. After thanking me for trying to understand, they told me that the "they-bey" term was the right choice. Otherwise, it's "companion" or "partner" and that many teen who are gender neutral feel like those terms sound too "old."  

I wonder if it is "they-bae" - as "bae" is used to denote a boyfriend/girlfriend

[Crs97]

My kids have friends who have recently announced they relate to different pronouns.  When I messed up (luckily not to them), my kids said, “Mom, you just say sorry and move on.  The worst thing you can do is make a big deal about it with your apology.”    So Tess’s reaction rang false to me.

[JayDub1987]

8 hours ago, bros402 said:

I wonder if it is "they-bae" - as "bae" is used to denote a boyfriend/girlfriend

It probably is. But I'm old so I didn't know there was a spelling difference LOL

[gonzosgirrl]

1 hour ago, JayDub1987 said:

It probably is. But I'm old so I didn't know there was a spelling difference LOL

LOL! Me too. I am get-off-my-lawn enough to loathe the 'bae' term in any context, and I though Bey was Beyonce. o_O

I admit to having a hard time getting used to they/them for a single person and my inner grammar-cop gets twitchy. But I realize it is entirely not about me, and people deserve to be referred to as they wish. I hope that any slip-ups are taken for what they are - an honest mistake - and not an indication of lack of respect or tolerance.

One thing I don't understand and need to look into further is, if you are non-binary how can you also identify as gay/lesbian/queer?

[Blakeston]

11 hours ago, gonzosgirrl said:

One thing I don't understand and need to look into further is, if you are non-binary how can you also identify as gay/lesbian/queer?

I've seen people call themselves "non-binary lesbians," and they were promptly criticized for it. IMO, it really doesn't make much sense to call yourself gay or lesbian if you don't identify as male or female.

Being non-binary and queer makes sense to me, though, because queer is an umbrella term for LGBT. And in some cases it means non-binary and pansexual.

[bros402]

13 hours ago, gonzosgirrl said:

LOL! Me too. I am get-off-my-lawn enough to loathe the 'bae' term in any context, and I though Bey was Beyonce. o_O

I admit to having a hard time getting used to they/them for a single person and my inner grammar-cop gets twitchy. But I realize it is entirely not about me, and people deserve to be referred to as they wish. I hope that any slip-ups are taken for what they are - an honest mistake - and not an indication of lack of respect or tolerance.

One thing I don't understand and need to look into further is, if you are non-binary how can you also identify as gay/lesbian/queer?

On the LGBTQ spectrm there's pansexual, asexual, a bunch of different -sexuals

[LadyIrony]

On 6/7/2021 at 3:03 AM, Blakeston said:

I really have to think that the writers have done a disservice to queer people with the depiction of Tess this season.

There are probably lots of viewers who don't know much about things like nonbinary identities, who are now nervous about the prospect of having a queer person in their families, because they think they'll be demonized if they occasionally get someone's pronouns wrong.

Going strictly off the show the sense I get is that you would be walking on eggshells the whole time. And if the kid wants to bring a special friend up to their room than you have to allow it. And of course if they don't like the clothes they are expected to wear for a someone else's event than you better alter it quick smart even if it ruins photos and that person's special day or even their deposit if it's rented! 

Edited June 9, 2021 by LadyIrony

[Violetgoblin6]

So yeah. Before I dig in enthusiastically reading all your commentary (just watched it, 6/9), I had to add my comment.

So, I basically screamed at the end, with joy. I love him. Like major crush, loved him on A Million Little Things. His voice actually calms me. 

 

And I ask myself, why did I assume this entire time that Toby was going to leave Kate? I guess because I picked up on his tension with being a SAHD and the gym obsession maybe? His dad foreshadowing about "tension", as it related to the pipes in the ceiling? But anyway, no wonder Toby is so depressed in the future. 

Okay, questions, yes, I'm terribly late here. 

Are Kevin and Madison married 5 years in the future? They said the Big 3 were 45.

Does Kevin still act? 

What's Randall up to? Mayor of Philadelphia? 

Will Deja join Malik at Harvard or will they go to Penn together? Looked like wherever Deja was doing her medical residency was in driving distance. As a native of the Philadelphia burbs who leaves now near Bethlehem (TIU's weak grasp on the geography of the Poconos), it's a very doable drive.

Nicky has a wife! Sally? 

I cried when Rebecca asked Kevin to build her house. Big 3 Builders, finally. I've been waiting for that to come fruition for awhile. She mentioned that she's having trouble holding Jack in her memories. I know observant watchers on here mentioned that perhaps Nicky stands in for Jack as she doesn't remember him, or something to that effect. 

Tess looked gorgeous.  

 

 

[Violetgoblin6]

On 5/25/2021 at 11:09 PM, katycat74 said:

I got a kick out of Kate and her excitement about Dynasty's Moldavian Massacre.  I'm old enough to remember watching that in real time.  It WAS a huge event!! 

Same, I think we're the same age too. 74? 

[Violetgoblin6]

On 5/30/2021 at 1:44 AM, bros402 said:

Nicky and Miguel go on a trip to find Nicky's lost love.

and Annie snuck into the car to spend time with her grandpa and great-uncle.

Smiles. I'd totally watch this! 

[cameron]

20 hours ago, Violetgoblin6 said:

So yeah. Before I dig in enthusiastically reading all your commentary (just watched it, 6/9), I had to add my comment.

So, I basically screamed at the end, with joy. I love him. Like major crush, loved him on A Million Little Things. His voice actually calms me. 

 

And I ask myself, why did I assume this entire time that Toby was going to leave Kate? I guess because I picked up on his tension with being a SAHD and the gym obsession maybe? His dad foreshadowing about "tension", as it related to the pipes in the ceiling? But anyway, no wonder Toby is so depressed in the future. 

Okay, questions, yes, I'm terribly late here. 

Are Kevin and Madison married 5 years in the future? They said the Big 3 were 45.

Does Kevin still act? 

What's Randall up to? Mayor of Philadelphia? 

Will Deja join Malik at Harvard or will they go to Penn together? Looked like wherever Deja was doing her medical residency was in driving distance. As a native of the Philadelphia burbs who leaves now near Bethlehem (TIU's weak grasp on the geography of the Poconos), it's a very doable drive.

Nicky has a wife! Sally? 

I cried when Rebecca asked Kevin to build her house. Big 3 Builders, finally. I've been waiting for that to come fruition for awhile. She mentioned that she's having trouble holding Jack in her memories. I know observant watchers on here mentioned that perhaps Nicky stands in for Jack as she doesn't remember him, or something to that effect. 

Tess looked gorgeous.  

 

 

Rebecca needs to put the memories of Jack on the back burner.  Enough is enough.

[Good Queen Jane]

Ooooh, maybe Rebecca's obsession with the Dynasty Moldavian Massacre is a foreshadowing of what happens next in the flash forward. At Kate's wedding, Miguel (tired of being ignored) pulls out a gun and kills Kate, Phillip, Madison, and anyone else who doesn't appear in the Rebecca death bed flash forward before turning the gun on himself. (Just kidding!)

Edited June 11, 2021 by Good Queen Jane

[debraran]

For many who forgot the Princess Bride start this shorter youtube clip shows Kevin at party at the end. He is adorable.

 

[MsJamieDornan]

https://www.tvinsider.com/1000344/this-is-us-season-5-finale-justin-hartley-kevin-wife-future/

Justin dances around a few things. 

[debraran]

20 minutes ago, MsJamieDornan said:

https://www.tvinsider.com/1000344/this-is-us-season-5-finale-justin-hartley-kevin-wife-future/

Justin dances around a few things. 

I'm glad he said what most thought anyway. I do think it was a nice way of doing it but way to drawn out. It could have happened before the wedding and had them use the last show to highlight other characters for next season surprises. Did anyone really think the wedding would happen?

I am surprised they didn't ask him about Sophie's call or other women but it will be fun to see how it pans out. Everyone knows how to be coy and keep interest (if you are interested) If something seems like a dead end, they will add hope.

Alexandra who plays Sophie, was not supposed to say much and she didn't. There is the obvious show she is on (and very popular) but she mentioned in one article VR films for 3 months. This is Us films for much longer. She said I can't say much but I was supposed to be back more but couldn't. I do hope to be back more in the future. What happened was she was a regular cast member and then Kevin was to go on this long arc of finding himself, Vietnam, Nicky, Zoe, Cassidy, etc. They covered her pregnancy well and it gave her time .She was obviously off the air for a long time on show and asked for a different contract to do other things in between. Low and behold, she got Virgin River, a starring role and probably more money. She said their 30 year love affair is special and she looks forward to working with such a great cast but can't say in what capacity at this time. All I learned from that article was her contract change and I can see her not wanting to be waiting a year or two for Kevin to get his act together. If they do end up together I can see it being more at the end of the season and filling in other episodes with different Pearson's.

 

Edited June 13, 2021 by debraran

[Scarlett45]

On 5/25/2021 at 10:11 PM, KaveDweller said:

Madison's mother really sucked. If you can't stand being married to your awful husband, why not take your kid with you?

Likely (in no particular order) 1. Money, 2. You never wanted to be a mother but had a child because with your spouse because it was expected. In many situations like this a parent is offered a nice settlement to walk away and not “bother” the other person any more. Madison’s father likely had money (given the job he had and the type of lifestyle they lived)- he may have offered his wife a lot of money to “stay gone” and she took it because parenting Madison wasn’t high on her priority list. 
 

Think of Dylan from Beverly Hills 90210- his Mom was given $6million to stay away and she did. 
 

If Madison didn’t want to marry a man that wasn’t in love with her, then I’m glad she ended things with Kevin. Getting married for partnership and child rearing and hoping love will come is fine, if BOTH parties go into it with the same expectations and want the same things from the relationship. Madison wants to be in love, she did the right thing by both her and Kevin (and the twins). 

[Dreamboat Annie]

On 6/3/2021 at 7:14 AM, ShadowFacts said:

These are super sharp observations! I'm just wondering if/why the weddings would be at the same location. Except to fool us, of course. If his perfectly crafted wedding to Madison didn't happen as we know it didn't, but he marries her in the future, would a person go to the same site for the second time? Maybe, maybe not. If he marries someone else, a new location would be probable. Besides lighting, were the bathroom and bedroom the same?

 

Thank you! - Time will tell if they amount to anything :).  I don't think it's the same location/venue.  I don't think we saw the bedroom when Kevin was practicing in the mirror the first time, but it does look to me like the two bathrooms were different.  When we saw him practicing at first, we were lead to believe it was for his soon to be called off wedding to Madison.. then we learned at the end that he had been practicing for Kate's wedding to Phillip.. and my theory is that he wasn't practicing for either of those weddings when he was practicing near the beginning of this episode.  We did see him leave the bathroom near the end, and we saw that bedroom, which was in the hotel they were at for Kate's second wedding.  And good question about whether they would choose the same venue if Kevin and Madison get married in the future - they could, but I hope they wouldn't, I hope it would be a different location/venue, if only to reflect the fact they are in a different "place" in their relationship than they were when their first wedding was called off.  I don't know about anyone else, but I know I would always associate the first location with the sad memories of a called off wedding, even if it ended amicably like theirs did.  

 

On 6/3/2021 at 5:25 AM, debraran said:

Another thing that I thought stuck out (for me) was that the hotel room was all female in the sense Kevin except for his jacket wasn't there. Bed was blurry but you saw at least one side pulled back and a pink robe and the pink again bra on chair and a dress or robe and women's clothes in the armoire along with his dress jacket. The bathroom only had women's products and no shaving items etc or anything to show Kevin.

Maybe just a heavy handed, "hey a woman also shared this room but a bit much. Not even a robe for him or anything like that. If he didn't take jacket out of the armorie I'd think he just stopped in. (and he could have and hung it up)

Also and it's a split second, I know they film scenes in parts, but when Kevin is leaving this room, the bed in the back doesn't have the pink robe on it when obvious during the "look at Randall" magazine shot. I wish sometimes my brain didn't lock into these things because I'm not sure the writers mean for you too, but I've always liked the "what's wrong in this picture" type of things since I was a kid. ; )

 

Yes, it sure seemed all female, which makes me wonder if Kevin was using someone else's room just to get ready (but he wouldn't need to do that unless it was his own wedding).  At first I thought it might be Rebecca's room because really who else would keep the magazine open to Randall's article but his mom (lol)?  Who in four years will even want an actual magazine featuring Randall but his mom?*  But Rebecca's room would have Miguel's things in it too if he was there.  I know we saw Kevin, Randall, Nicky and Phillip at the end, but did we see Miguel?**

But if Kevin was getting ready, you're right, there doesn't seem to be any men's toiletries in the bathroom.  What I did notice was a ladies watch.  I guess some people still wear watches in four years' time.  (Heck, I still had mine practically super glued to my wrist for almost a decade after I got my first cell phone because I was so used to it I didn't want to part with it even though I had my phone with me all the time.)  From what I can tell, and admittedly I didn't look too far, Rebecca, Beth and Madison don't wear watches, the one Kate wears resembles a man's watch and has a rather large round face.  The black ladies watch in the bathroom has a small rectangular face.  The only character I can tie this to is Sophie, a nurse - so a watch makes sense, and when she called Kevin to "congratulate" him she was wearing not the exact same one but one quite similar - a black watch with a square face.  The watch was very visible, showcased almost, as she was waving her left hand up and around while she was on the phone.

The pink robe was missing from the bed?  I will have to see that again!  I agree with you that they film in parts and multiple takes and if it were any other show, that's what I would chalk it up to.  Maybe he's not alone in that room when he leaves it to to ask Kate if he can use The Princess Bride in his speech...

...which brings me to "obviously".  Kevin says in the first practicing that he can't use it - obviously.  That could mean anything.  Like we had remarked, if he was using it for his own wedding, it wouldn't make sense to use it unless he was marrying Sophie.  And when Madison asked him (in the episode previous to this one, I think) if he had been practicing saying his vows, she said something like "remember - no silliness, no movie quotes, improv Kevin was not invited...".  (She didn't say "silliness", but I recall that was the gist.  I think she did say "no movie quotes".)

Like I've said before, all this could mean absolutely nothing.  With this show, it's often a toss up as to whether something means anything significant or whether they're faking us out.

 

*   Out of everyone in the family, Randall and Beth might but I don't think it was Randall and Beth's room, based only on when Kevin left the room, Randall appeared from another hallway around the corner - but that could mean nothing.

**  We may have seen Miguel in that hallway but I really don't recall if we did .  I'd like to see it again but just two days ago we had a rep from our cable provider here to replace our outdated boxes with the new ones and that meant losing all our taped shows!  😭

 

[chocolatine]

@Dreamboat Annie, you are so perceptive! I watched that scene twice but didn't pick up on the watch at all.

Also, you get bonus points for being a Heart fan.

[debraran]

11 hours ago, Dreamboat Annie said:

 

 

 

 

*   Out of everyone in the family, Randall and Beth might but I don't think it was Randall and Beth's room, based only on when Kevin left the room, Randall appeared from another hallway around the corner - but that could mean nothing.

**  We may have seen Miguel in that hallway but I really don't recall if we did .  I'd like to see it again but just two days ago we had a rep from our cable provider here to replace our outdated boxes with the new ones and that meant losing all our taped shows!  😭

 

I don't think Randall's room but really a lot was left out. And in 5 years, there are magazines people buy? lol  I also noted that "great article" had mistakes, the first paragraph repeats at the third, something I realize NO ONE expected you to see, I enlarged a better pic, but really prop guys, you couldn't fill in more fluff without repeating.☺️

I think Kevin used that room, came in, hung up his jacket, dropped his wallet on the end table, maybe read the carefully propped magazine, went in bathroom and practiced his speech. His children have to be with someone and they weren't in that room also. Who would be minding all the Pearson children? There were no signs of them or an extra bed. Another possible prop error (I don't expect perfection) was there was a spray bottle you see in first Kevin speech and not later and they keep the camera very tight in that scene. They made him act like he was preparing speech for a wife, much more intense, the "first may I say, you are beautiful" and later at the end scene, he was more lighthearted. He even casually told Kate she was pretty in the room, so that whole scene didn't make sense. Was it to throw us off? Maybe. Two weddings? Maybe but if you think about it too much, nothing makes sense. Did he wear the same suit twice?

I also wondered why TIU made Sophie a nurse. Was it to make her help Kevin later? Was that the original outline? She could have been anything and TIU never does anything for no reason.

I guess we will see, my hope is that our ideas don't make us disappointed in theirs.

 

Edited June 24, 2021 by debraran

[Thumper]

On 5/26/2021 at 9:50 AM, cameron said:

Guess I'm probably the only one out there that doesn't like Uncle Nicky.  

Just finished this episode last night.  I often find Uncle Nicky annoying, but he cracked me up in this episode.  He is just so socially clueless! 😁

[debraran]

6 hours ago, Thumper said:

Just finished this episode last night.  I often find Uncle Nicky annoying, but he cracked me up in this episode.  He is just so socially clueless! 😁

I liked him once Jack dissed him and he tried to come back to him numerous times. In 5 years when we get back, he wont be as clueless but probably still eccentric a bit.

On 6/23/2021 at 5:50 PM, Dreamboat Annie said:

 

.  

 

 

Yes, it sure seemed all female, which makes me wonder if Kevin was using someone else's room just to get ready (but he wouldn't need to do that unless it was his own wedding).  At first I thought it might be Rebecca's room because really who else would keep the magazine open to Randall's article but his mom (lol)?  Who in four years will even want an actual magazine featuring Randall but his mom?*  But Rebecca's room would have Miguel's things in it too if he was there.  I know we saw Kevin, Randall, Nicky and Phillip at the end, but did we see Miguel?**

 

 

*   Out of everyone in the family, Randall and Beth might but I don't think it was Randall and Beth's room, based only on when Kevin left the room, Randall appeared from another hallway around the corner - but that could mean nothing.

**  We may have seen Miguel in that hallway but I really don't recall if we did .  I'd like to see it again but just two days ago we had a rep from our cable provider here to replace our outdated boxes with the new ones and that meant losing all our taped shows!  😭

 

Randall wasn't coming from his room, he went out with Nicky and was coming back with him, he said to Kevin "he got this" or something like that, he'll be watching him, keeping him on time. I think knowing TIU, it's all smoke and mirrors. I don't believe for a second that room was Kevin and Madison's, a knee jerk reaction by some because then there is no mystery and they did a very bad job of "cliff hanging" the ending. Madison said "12 times" and the robe etc. but as many here saw, there were clues not there, no male items, no bed for the children, no mention of the kids, the difference in the speech from beginning to end, etc. I hope it doesn't fall flat, how boring it would be if that was "real" and we pretty much see the ending. I guess there will be one episode where "Oh that was it!" will be said and a puzzle piece will fall into place.

Edited July 4, 2021 by debraran

[Thumper]

On 5/27/2021 at 4:57 AM, circumvent said:

I liked most of the episode. Nothing really stuck out for me, they went for the cliche of one partner realizing, last minute, that getting married is not the thing they want, but it wasn't as saccharine as most shows do. 

Like people have mentioned, Harvard in not in Boston and if Malik thinks that it is, he should be unaccepted. 

I didn't mind Tess throwing a little fit over the dress, she is a moody teenager. What I don't get it, is how come she didn't know what the dress looked like. She doesn't have a problem speaking her mind to at least one person every episode, she could have said no to being a bridesmaid, She could have been extra nice and tell Madison that she loved her and uncle Kevin, but she doesn't want to wear that dress. Probably not the nicest thing to do, a little selfish, but in character. She also would have tried the dress for fitting, it was hardly a surprise. 

But more than that, why can't bridesmaids choose their own dresses? I have friends who just told theirs the color and length she wanted for the dresses, and that was it. They picked their own design. Nobody really cared if they didn't have the same dress. It is a silly tradition, imo. 

 

I think the  “picking your own” bridesmaid dress idea, with guidelines from the bride (color range, etc) is becoming much more common now, although my friend did it for her wedding in 1980.

 

 

 

[Thumper]

I have never seen “The Princess Bride,”so I thought he was doing an Elmer Fudd imitation just to be silly!  😂

[CrystalBlue]

2 hours ago, Thumper said:

I have never seen “The Princess Bride,”so I thought he was doing an Elmer Fudd imitation just to be silly!  😂

Me too.  The entire Princess Bride kitsch was lost on me.  Nevertheless, I personally don't think it's cute or clever, just some popular culture reference for a ceremony that is not (or should not be IMHO) a comedy routine.  Yeah, I am a lot of fun at parties.  😕