While I agree with almost all of your post, andromeda, I had to copy this part because, for all of his faults, we do find out that Mr. Bennet had always planned to introduce himself to Bingley and Darcy.
From Chapter 2: “Mr. Bennet was among the earliest of those who waited on Mr. Bingley. He had always intended to visit him, though to the last always assuring his wife that he should not go; and till the evening after the visit was paid she had no knowledge of it.”
Doesn’t take him off the worst parents list, but I will throw him this particular bone.