S09.E13: She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not

[Elizzikra]

4 hours ago, Mercolleen said:

I'm pretty sure Matt will say yes just so that he has a place to live. Joke will be on him when Sharp stops paying the rent.

Meh. Amber will pick up the tab and Matt can still do whatever he wants.

[princelina]

6 hours ago, kerrieway said:

If Amber was the one attracted to Raven and he didnt feel the same she would be so unbearable he'd have to disappear, however they consider each other "best friends." I'm sorry what? "Best friends" not good friend or friends since kindergarten or pals...yeah he wants her.

Or he's a casual friend who joined forces to apply for the show with her - and now production has decided they want him on the show and are calling him her "best friend".  (for the record - I did not believe Jamie's lunch date was Elizabeth's "best friend" either)

[princelina]

5 hours ago, configdotsys said:

What I really don't understand is why the interactions that all the couples have are taken at face value but when it comes to Greg and Deonna, many believe that they probably behave completely differently off camera.

IMO it's because when the couples are actively neglectful or unkind on camera/in public, we assume that they don't belong together even if one half of the couple is pathetic enough to seem to want it. (Or, in Jamie and Elizabeth's case - both halves 😄)

When they constantly just show one half acting lovestruck while the other half "has walls", that makes me think "trying to create conflict where none exists" - see Bobby and Danielle last season, and hopefully Greg and Deonna this year.

[Lindz]

3 hours ago, Adeejay said:

It’s almost as if Keith should be punished for not falling madly in love with Iris.

No it's not. The problem with men like them is they DON'T try & say bs, vague, soundbites!! They just decide it's a no & play nice until the end. We don't want to see that bs! It's whack! They're MARRIED!! Put in EFFORT!! Try to work through your issues that you're barely sharing with your wife or leave the experiment & stop wasting everyone's time. That's the correct & respectable thing to do.

[watchingtvaddict]

54 minutes ago, Lindz said:

No it's not. The problem with men like them is they DON'T try & say bs, vague, soundbites!! They just decide it's a no & play nice until the end. We don't want to see that bs! It's whack! They're MARRIED!! Put in EFFORT!! Try to work through your issues that you're barely sharing with your wife or leave the experiment & stop wasting everyone's time. That's the correct & respectable thing to do.

Keith should at least try! He was Married at First Sight. I feel like I don't know him. He hasn't opened up about anything this season. He is super bland.

At least with Will (the groom paired up with Jasmine from last season). We found out he wanted to rent out houses and volunteer as a basketball coach to underprivileged kids. He didn't try with Jasmine at all but he gave us some information to speculate on why they weren't a good match.

Keith just keeps on talking about how Iris is immature... he doesn't talk about his wants and desires and he is not making an effort to communicate to his wife about his wants and desires. It's all very one-sided where we are supposed to blame Iris for the failure of the marriage. But, I think this is all on Keith. Iris is at least trying to create some sort of bond. 

[Jeanne222]

What if on decision day both Keith and Iris  start laughing and tell us they have been having great sex since week two!

What then?

[Delta Blow]

18 hours ago, sasha206 said:

And really, if you have to talk constantly about being a virgin, you are taking all of the passion out of sex.  It either happens or it doesn't.  Stop fucking talking about it!

And start talking fucking about it!

[Delta Blow]

16 hours ago, Drogo said:

Raven is actually Roma Downey in Touched By An Angel and he's just waiting for the right post-Matt time to convert Amber. 

Raven is forever friend-zoned.

Such a pity as he seems like a decent kid. Working with teens, I see Ravens tossed to the side, and crushed to smithereens daily for Matts. 

[cinsays]

5 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

Keith should at least try! He was Married at First Sight. I feel like I don't know him. He hasn't opened up about anything this season. He is super bland.

At least with Will (the groom paired up with Jasmine from last season). We found out he wanted to rent out houses and volunteer as a basketball coach to underprivileged kids. He didn't try with Jasmine at all but he gave us some information to speculate on why they weren't a good match.

Keith just keeps on talking about how Iris is immature... he doesn't talk about his wants and desires and he is not making an effort to communicate to his wife about his wants and desires. It's all very one-sided where we are supposed to blame Iris for the failure of the marriage. But, I think this is all on Keith. Iris is at least trying to create some sort of bond. 

But we only know what they televise and the powers that be don't care if we know Keith and we don't know what he communicates to dear Iris off camera.  We are left to assume what they want us to assume.

[qtpye]

5 hours ago, tvtubebaby said:

Raven is forever friend-zoned.

Such a pity as he seems like a decent kid. Working with teens, I see Ravens tossed to the side, and crushed to smithereens daily for Matts. 

If Raven and Amber wanted a relationship it would have happened by now. I know some people think heterosexual men and women can’t be friends but there are exceptions, particularly for childhood friends. Yes, there is an element of no one is attracted enough to take it to the next level, but you still can value the friendship itself.

[Lindz]

LOLOLOMG!!!! Oh these people kill me!! Commenting on other relationships they need to apply to THEMSELVES!! 😂😂 On last week's Unfiltered, Elizabeth told Amber, "Don't settle for this nonsense, you don't deserve this, you can do so much better than him." LOL!! Wow. I wonder how many times she said that to herself. Jamie O asked Amber what she'd like Matt to do, not what he does cuz everyone knows it's NOTHING. 😂😂 Pastor Cal said he felt good about Jamie & Elizabeth's fight?! Uh. NO. Their arguments are getting worse & escalated to where it will eventually become physical. They are going the wrong way. Still didn't ask Elizabeth WHY she was talking over the instructor?? WHERETHEYDOTHATAT?!! & everyone saying Keith needs to be direct.... WHERE are they direct & demanding their partner be direct?? MIRRORS PEOPLE!!!!

Edited September 7, 2019 by Lindz

[MajorNelson]

1 hour ago, Lindz said:

n last week's Unfiltered, Elizabeth told Amber, "Don't settle for this nonsense, you don't deserve this, you can do so much better than him." LOL!! Wow. I wonder how many times she said that to herself. Jamie O asked Amber what she'd like Matt to do, not what he does cuz everyone knows it's NOTHING. 😂😂 Pastor Cal said he felt good about Jamie & Elizabeth's fight?!

So I'm getting confused about the dates involved.  So the show was filmed in Feb, and March, maybe a week of April, but when were these Unfiltered filmed?  I assume like August?  Anyone know?  But basically...weren't they filmed after  decision day?

So comments made to appear realtime, like Amber still has to make a decision, are weird to me.  As someone said, they felt all these Unfiltered shows are scripted.

But PC commenting positively on Big Red's fight is either...they both said Yes, or they split up and he thinks but gee they didn't have to with such "healthy" sharing of views and opinions.  (GROAN).

[Stinamaia]

I don’t care if Keith is trying or not trying or direct or indirect.  I just want his face on my TV and watch his lips move.  Ot not move.

[sasha206]

In watching this show, I can't imagine wanting to get on TV or married that badly that you would do this.  Beyond the initial shock of who you are marrying and the first intimate encounter, there's nothing really to look forward to other than I suppose finding out if the person really wants to stay married to you.  There is no excitement of being asked out, the excitement of a first date, the excitement of a proposal, the excitement of a wedding day.  The excitement of someone naturally falling in love with you and telling you that in an unforced manner.  If these people are initially attracted and have sex fairly soon, it's really like a one-night stand that lasts longer. 

[psychoticstate]

Regardless of Elizabeth's decision I hope she will go shopping to find tops and dresses with bodices that actually fit.  If three quarters of your boob is exposed, the top is too small, Elizabeth.   Based on her "last dinner" scene with Jamie, I do think she'd look great if she cut her hair to above her shoulders.  

The producers need to play Matt's THs for Amber.  He says point blank that he does not want to spend all his time with her.  Granted, you shouldn't want to spend every minute of your time with someone except when you are in the honeymoon stage of your relationship, which they should still be in.  He is clearly checked out and it's cruel and unusual punishment to allow this to continue.

On Decision Day, the experts should be filled in on what Raven (??) told Amber, they need to confront Matt (because Amber won't) and then make Amber's decision for her.  

I don't think Iris virginity is the issue for Keith.  I think it's her immaturity and he needs to tell her.  Of course, I think he should have been having this discussion with her all along, especially since she asks him if her virginity is a problem at least once an episode.   Keith seems like a chill guy (and he's gorgeous) and I think if Iris had been equally chill about her v-card and letting things progress naturally and not bringing it up ad nauseum, Keith might have been in it for the long haul but now I'm not sure.

Elizabeth and Jamie will probably be stupid enough to decide to stay together but will likely get into a screaming match about sex and materialism the same night.

I'm surprised the previews for next episode showed Greg's decision.  I love Greg.  

[psychoticstate]

Going back and reading some earlier posts in the thread, I agree with most of y'all.

I think Amber is most in need of therapy out of all the folks.   She very clearly has abandonment issues.  I think the "experts" believed she and Matt would be a match because both had their families break up.  Unfortunately, while Amber is craving the security of home and married life, Matt wants the opposite.  He doesn't want to be tied down.  So the "experts" have done a great disserve to Amber by matching her with him and she's probably been damaged by this "experiment."  

Look, I understand she's needy and I understand that Matt may want to get the fuck away from her.  But this is his wife.  If you're going to stay in it, for 8 weeks, for life, whatever, then you man up and have a discussion with your wife.  At the very least, you let her know where you're going and when you'll be home.  And if you don't do that, you respond to her texts so she knows you're not on a mortuary slab.  

It makes me wonder how many times Matt hasn't come home that we haven't seen.  

Amber, get a divorce and a good therapist.  Please.   

[MajorNelson]

1 hour ago, sasha206 said:

In watching this show, I can't imagine wanting to get on TV or married that badly that you would do this.  Beyond the initial shock of who you are marrying and the first intimate encounter, there's nothing really to look forward to other than I suppose finding out if the person really wants to stay married to you.  There is no excitement of being asked out, the excitement of a first date, the excitement of a proposal, the excitement of a wedding day.  The excitement of someone naturally falling in love with you and telling you that in an unforced manner.  If these people are initially attracted and have sex fairly soon, it's really like a one-night stand that lasts longer. 

Well pop everybody's bubble, why don't you.? This is of course a realistic view, you have.  But I guess "reality" tv CAN'T HAVE a REALISTIC view or presentation!

[Neurochick]

2 hours ago, sasha206 said:

In watching this show, I can't imagine wanting to get on TV or married that badly that you would do this.  Beyond the initial shock of who you are marrying and the first intimate encounter, there's nothing really to look forward to other than I suppose finding out if the person really wants to stay married to you.  There is no excitement of being asked out, the excitement of a first date, the excitement of a proposal, the excitement of a wedding day.  The excitement of someone naturally falling in love with you and telling you that in an unforced manner.  If these people are initially attracted and have sex fairly soon, it's really like a one-night stand that lasts longer. 

I think it's simple.  These people want to be married but don't want to do to work to attract a suitable partner and then they get married and realize that yes, it's more work.

[Auntie]

11 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

In watching this show, I can't imagine wanting to get on TV or married that badly that you would do this. 

When it comes right down to it, nobody on this show is actually looking for their "true love."  They are looking for TV exposure, hoping it leads to some magical TV career. They get a free wedding, free to-die-for honeymoon, apparently they also get paid to be on the show, they get a free place to "play house" for 2 months, and then they can do whatever the hell they want. I'm sure the show probably pays for the divorces, too. Nobody treats this as a true, everlasting marriage (not that many are anymore, but...) it's all just a game to them. 

We have seen this season alone how many people lie during the "interview" just to get on the show. Once those lies are exposed, there should be something in the "contract" for these game show participants that if they are caught in a lie they are automatically removed from the show. Period. To go even further, the idiots that produce this circus should be held accountable for not vetting these people properly, if at all, in the first place!! The contracts must have some pretty protective language covering the show's ass or else can you imagine the lawsuits that could be filed against the show, producers, network???

This year's show seems particularly trashy and centered on creating hurtful, irreparable emotional damage. No down-to-earth conversations, no financial planning discussions, no "hey, let's just go for a walk and talk to each other" stuff. Instead, each person is given a label at the beginning of the show, and that's what it remains they whole damn show. 

It doesn't make any difference if I've known someone a day or 50 years, if they ever talked to me, or treated me the way these fucking assholes do on this show - I'd be gone so damn fast their heads would still be spinning a month later. There is absolutely NO REASON to treat ANYBODY this way.

[humbleopinion]

or

I have looked at the bottom of every barrel, lifted up and dated whatever slithered out under every rock in my hometown area and have not found a suitable mate who is ready for marriage ...like Kate from last season

or

Fame Ho like Keith, Iris, Puke

or

Am curious if after all the of questionnaires, interviews, workshops, invasion of privacy is my story compelling enough to be chosen and matched with someone....like Greg, Deonna, Stephanie

[Adeejay]

17 hours ago, Lindz said:

No it's not. The problem with men like them is they DON'T try & say bs, vague, soundbites!! They just decide it's a no & play nice until the end. We don't want to see that bs! It's whack! They're MARRIED!! Put in EFFORT!! Try to work through your issues that you're barely sharing with your wife or leave the experiment & stop wasting everyone's time. That's the correct & respectable thing to do.

Would you rather that he'd slept with her and several months down the line when the cameras are gone dump her or be a gentleman and ride it out to decision day?

[Lindz]

3 minutes ago, Adeejay said:

Would you rather that he'd slept with her and several months down the line when the cameras are gone dump her or be a gentleman and ride it out to decision day?

LOL!! It's NOT about sex!! Coasting & confusing his spouse til Decision Day is NOT gentlemanly! My point is he should've been upfront with her & exited the experiment when he decided he wanted to stop being married to her. Like awful Matt!

[Lindz]

1 hour ago, Auntie said:

Once those lies are exposed, there should be something in the "contract" for these game show participants that if they are caught in a lie they are automatically removed from the show. 

To go a step further, they should be removed if they're abusive. Instead of that sham "recommitment." MAFS brought them together, they should set them apart. & make them earn their pay & such by following the "experts" advice. Like, you're told how to succeed & you're just gunna ignore it?? WTF?! You wanna fail then. What's the point?! You don't know how to be married, LISTEN!! 😂😂

[LuvMyShows]

On 9/5/2019 at 7:47 AM, Meowwww said:

Watch, the mystery woman at the bar turns out to be Matt’s sister or something.  Someone clearly told Matt to be all-in for the cameras.  I didn’t know he had so many words   

On 9/6/2019 at 2:45 AM, gingerandcloves said:

Cut to Amber and Matt on couch, sitting far apart. Amber: "My best friend saw him talking to a girl at a bar, and then he left with the girl." Dr. Vivianna looks over at the other two experts. Pastor Cal raises his eyebrows, like, seriously? Matt: "But I'm also just holding out hope." Dr. Pepper in annoyed tone: "Holding out hope? Are you dating?" 

I thought that they showed Pepper saying, "While you're dating?", which would have been a great truth bomb.  So going with that wording, that shoots down what had initially been my theory too, that there's some innocuous explanation about the other woman.

On 9/5/2019 at 11:18 AM, lids said:

We finally get to see the breakdown between Iris and Keith. Iris’ mom said all Iris relationships have been a disaster.

I missed this on the show, but from reading a few other comments here, it doesn't sound like they gave us any deetz on what went wrong...is that right? 

23 hours ago, configdotsys said:

What I really don't understand is why the interactions that all the couples have are taken at face value but when it comes to Greg and Deonna, many believe that they probably behave completely differently off camera.

...because the show has done that exact thing to us not once, but twice, when dealing with (non-virginal partner) couples supposedly not having sex...first with Nick and Sonia, and then Kate and Luke.

[Lily247]

On 9/6/2019 at 12:33 PM, sasha206 said:

Ha, that is a good point!

I was just hoping that there was *some* reason like her mom's leaving her that would explain the incredible amount of tears that she was shedding that resulted in multiple texts and four phone calls at 10:30 at night 

Low self esteem. 

She may appear to remind us how successful she is, and show how she takes herself very seriously, but in reality it looks like a cover for someone with confidence issues. I saw it when she played up her income (80K, which cant be true unless she strips during the summer). Also, I will make 2 wild guesses: that she has few female friends, and that isnt close with her twin sister. 

[Empress1]

9 hours ago, qtpye said:

If Raven and Amber wanted a relationship it would have happened by now. I know some people think heterosexual men and women can’t be friends but there are exceptions, particularly for childhood friends. Yes, there is an element of no one is attracted enough to take it to the next level, but you still can value the friendship itself.

Right. Maybe they really are friends. I have straight male friends. We're not attracted to each other but we like each other and have things in common, so we're friends. 

5 hours ago, sasha206 said:

In watching this show, I can't imagine wanting to get on TV or married that badly that you would do this. 

I can understand why the women do, to be honest. I'd never, but I get it. Women are still inundated with "you're nobody 'til somebody loves you" messaging. Couples tend to close ranks and associate with other couples, so singles get left out (IIRC, Philly Stephanie touched on this - she was very open about wanting to be married because everybody she knew was married and she was tired of being alone). I've known plenty of women who just married the person they were with at the age they wanted to get married (usually between 28 - 32 or so) because they didn't want to start over, especially if they wanted kids. And dating in the age of apps is trash.

I don't really understand why the women in their mid-20s would do it - Boston Molly was like 24. I also don't understand why men would do it, because men who are reasonably together, reasonably attractive, and want to get married generally can. And if you want to be on TV, it seems like there are shows that would be way less effort to be on.

56 minutes ago, Lily247 said:

Also, I will make 2 wild guesses: that she has few female friends, and that isnt close with her twin sister. 

Amber appears to be pretty close with her twin. When they were sitting on the trampoline talking together, I wondered if they'd had a "secret twin language" when they were kids - they talk SO fast, but they understood each other perfectly. I'm not sure about female friends though. I think she had bridesmaids, but I don't think we've seen them since.

Edited September 7, 2019 by Empress1

[Neurochick]

2 hours ago, Auntie said:

We have seen this season alone how many people lie during the "interview" just to get on the show. Once those lies are exposed, there should be something in the "contract" for these game show participants that if they are caught in a lie they are automatically removed from the show. Period. To go even further, the idiots that produce this circus should be held accountable for not vetting these people properly, if at all, in the first place!! The contracts must have some pretty protective language covering the show's ass or else can you imagine the lawsuits that could be filed against the show, producers, network???

I would agree if this show were really an experiment, if it were about science.  But this is a show, it's about entertainment, people watching, ratings and drama brings ratings.  That's why folks watch the Housewives/90 Day Fiancee/Love and Hip Hop/Basketball Wives franchises.  

[LuvMyShows]

On 9/6/2019 at 3:31 PM, Lindz said:

It is THEIR fault!! Their actions affect & shape their children. Why bother raising them if you're not going to do it right & make their well-being TOP PRIORITY?? Makes no sense. So many people shouldn't be parents. 😂

Certainly parents' actions affect and shape their children, but that is so different from saying that when something a parent does has a negative effect on their child, then the subsequent negative behavior of the child is exclusively the parent's fault.  That absolves 'children' of any responsibility for their own behavior.  Plus it assumes that all parents should be perfect, and falling short of that standard means they must should shoulder blame for any and all aspects of their child that aren't perfect as well. 

Further, making a child "top priority" looks very different to different people...some would think that making their child's life as easy as possible and smoothing out all difficulties for them, is a great thing to do for a child.  Others would say that a child should learn to be resilient and the parents shouldn't jump through every hoop to remove all obstacles.  So there is no definitive set of correct parental behaviors for all situations.

And finally, since there's been no definitive verdict in the debate over nature vs. nurture, you can't discount nature as a contributor here!

[Neurochick]

54 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

Further, making a child "top priority" looks very different to different people...some would think that making their child's life as easy as possible and smoothing out all difficulties for them, is a great thing to do for a child.  Others would say that a child should learn to be resilient and the parents shouldn't jump through every hoop to remove all obstacles.  So there is no definitive set of correct parental behaviors for all situations.

And finally, since there's been no definitive verdict in the debate over nature vs. nurture, you can't discount nature as a contributor here!

I think we want to believe that if the kids are rotten it's the parents fault, because it's very scary to admit that most of life is a crapshoot.  Great parents raise shitty kids and shitty parents raise great kids all the time.  This show is a crapshoot as well, the best experts in the world could produce the exact same train wrecks as we're seeing this season.  People aren't robots, we're not perfect, we have feelings, we hurt.  And if you say, "if lie on your application, you may be sued," what could happen is no one will apply for the show.  No one wants to come on a show where they could be sued if an allegation of any kind is made.   You just can't protect people from themselves.  

[Lily247]

On 9/6/2019 at 3:31 PM, Lindz said:

It is THEIR fault!! Their actions affect & shape their children. Why bother raising them if you're not going to do it right & make their well-being TOP PRIORITY?? Makes no sense. So many people shouldn't be parents. 😂

No parent is perfect. The people whom I hear nowadays blaming their parents for their childhoods often come from privilege  backgrounds. Once a child grows up and becomes a fully fledged adult, they cant rely on the "I have emotional problems and it's my parents fault, so blame them not me", people eventually have to be accountable for themselves. For example, as a child, I never did chores. My mom cleaned everything, never asked me to help. She meant well and just thought I should focus on studying. As a young adult in my early 20s, for a long time I struggled with keeping my place clean. Should I have explained to my roommate. "I struggle still because its my moms fault. And it will always be my mom's fault!" 🤦‍♀️will Amber project these issues onto her own future kids? Will she not be able to handle school drop off and explain its because she has abandonment issues, moms fault ? I wouldn't even think to blame my mom for my episodes of messiness. Thats me being a lazy grownup! 

[Jeanne222]

There are a lot of Matt's in the world and a lot of women that love them and stay with them forever!  Sad but true!

[Adeejay]

4 hours ago, Lindz said:

LOL!! It's NOT about sex!! Coasting & confusing his spouse til Decision Day is NOT gentlemanly! My point is he should've been upfront with her & exited the experiment when he decided he wanted to stop being married to her. Like awful Matt!

Clearly, Keith isn't into Iris. What difference does it make if he dumps her before Decision Day or after?  It is what it is. 

[Lindz]

48 minutes ago, Adeejay said:

What difference does it make if he dumps her before Decision Day or after?  It is what it is. 

TIME!! Precious time! That's wasted being misled & confused, causing more damage! That's the difference! If you don't want to be with someone & you're not gunna try, BE AN ADULT & END IT!! SIMPLE. That's honorable & respectable.

[Lindz]

Y'all see Jephte's joke about Matt on twitter? About him being on apps... Talk about one of the LAST people that should comment. He LEFT his pregnant wife!! 😂😂 SIT. DOWN!!

[Jassie99]

I feel bad for Amber. The girl was in so much pain and its deeper than some jerk may have been cheating on her. It sucks to see her experience it. she's only 27 and yes that's not 17 or 22 but its still young. A lot us don't have it figured out till 35 or later that I've seen. She needs therapy. One thing I didn't like is her friend who obviously cares for her waited to tell her on camera. I'm sure he could've told her off its not like they have cameras 24/7. And I wonder why no romance between those two, he obviously really cares about her. I think something is there. 

This brings me to Keith and Iris. I am honestly confused with them. Why do they like each other in. a romantic way? We haven't seen them do anything other than that "dance" class and the gift exchange. I think they went to dinner twice including this time. Not that we've should've been privy to the ongoings with his grandma's passing. I wonder how did they get close from that? Thats a huge life event to go through. And I'm sure he is still dealing with. Its just like they are really good buddies. Not even good friends but buddies who you hang out with off and on through the yrs. "Oh yeah that guy...Oh he's a good guy ...Hey how you been" type friend. I think this episode was the first time outside of wedding day I saw them kiss. I don't recall any affection. No handholding, hands on lap, cuddling, nothing.  Its like if they do stay together I expect them to high five each other on decision day. I will say Iris is really pretty. I wonder if she's done any modeling she has the angles for it. 

Jamie is just a pig. I just do not like this guy. Was is it needed to tell her bff what text messages she send him? His constant gripe about sex is such a turn off. It would be to any woman I would think even if you looked like Jason Momoa (ok maybe him, lol). Anyhow, they're obviously going to stay together for some reason Beth likes the bore.  However, in their defense there is so much we don't see. On unfiltered Amber excited talked about all the things Jamie does for Beth, that sounded sweet. Like where is this guy? Also showed me how phony these  get togethers are cause they all live next to each other. That means they have these convos all the time and pretty much know how the others are doing. The women seem to be friends esp. with Amber. 

Lastly Greg and Deonna...what is there to say but they're fine. Their issues is understandable but they can make it through them.  Only issue I had watching them is the terrible lighting for them. I know its been mentioned but watching Deonna on unfiltered  the girl was 10 shades darker. The lighting is horrible for black people. They just can't seem to get it right, its astounding how bad it is. 

[Lindz]

37 minutes ago, Jassie99 said:

all the things Jamie does for Beth, that sounded sweet. Like where is this guy? 

Like how he set her up by telling her he loved her so early, she better be careful about any food/drinks he prepares for her... Maybe he's already slipping her mood stabilizers. Could be easy to slip something else if he's very angry. 😨😂

[Crazy Bird Lady]

14 hours ago, Lindz said:

Like how he set her up by telling her he loved her so early, she better be careful about any food/drinks he prepares for her... Maybe he's already slipping her mood stabilizers. Could be easy to slip something else if he's very angry. 😨😂

I think Jamie Matt is a very big douche, but he doesn't want to kill off Amber- he's planning to BS her into saying "yes" on D-Day, so that on nights when he doesn't score with another woman he'll still have a place he can go crash at 2:30 am (and raid the fridge, or maybe wake Amber up- and get his rocks off). 

Edited September 8, 2019 by Crazy Bird Lady
Wrong guy!

[PityFree]

On 9/6/2019 at 4:37 PM, MajorNelson said:

So......How about the producers should have taken both Amber and Raven, and then the experts could have PAIRED THEM UP!!!

That would have been quite the story line, hometown best friends to marry!  Of course, not exactly at First Sight as they usually mean it, but still a surprise!

 Except that it would’ve been incredibly creepy considering both Amber and Raven have the same exact face.

[gingerandcloves]

8 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

I thought that they showed Pepper saying, "While you're dating?", which would have been a great truth bomb.  So going with that wording, that shoots down what had initially been my theory too, that there's some innocuous explanation about the other woman.

Closed captioning says "Are you dating?" but it's hard to hear exactly what she says. It does sound like "while" but I can't be certain.

[Crazy Bird Lady]

On 9/4/2019 at 9:17 PM, Katie111 said:

Does Jamie own any shirts besides that blue v-neck?  He’s worn it about 1000 times this season.  He wears it to work out, sleeps in it, and dresses it up with a blazer. And he’s an ass. 

He's homeless, except for the place he shares with Amber -and he doesn't want to be there, so--

[Mazzy]

To me, earlier seasons seemed more genuine, as far as ppl actually coming on here to find their mate. I don't feel the way many others do, that being arranged married is some kind of nutjob thing to do. I think it's perfectly reasonable and honestly half the world does it so several billion people can't be all wrong. Doing it on a reality show is just a sign of the times in America. ~shrug~

But I don't know if the show just has terrible ratings or what has caused them to veer so far off course, but I've said it before and will say it again: most of the people on this season just don't make sense to have been chosen for an experiment like this.

Amber - there is absolutely no way to hide THAT level of neediness. We literally saw it on episode one, so why would she have been chosen?

Matt - homeless, unemployed, with no job skills. AND, seemingly a person who has been absolutely content their whole adult life with being a homeless drifter, as he told us early on that he crashed on friends' couches. No one would pick this guy as a good candidate.

Beth - obvious day one that she was just an attention seeker, not a good choice to pair with someone.

Iris - no one in their right mind would think putting a stranger on the spot on national television with a VIRGIN would be a good idea! If anything, if I were a producer, I'd be constantly worried the almost-30 year old virgin feeling "violated" if anything happened and it didn't work out and then I'd be producing the rape show!

So yeah, you get the idea, just none of these people make any sense at all as contestants.

As for D-day I have never gotten that part, even since the beginning. They can literally get divorced whenever they want so there is no great pressure to decide by that day.

And last - I don't understand all the Keith-hate. I will admit it doesn't make any sense at all that he is on this show. If anyone DOESN'T need help with a relationship I'd say it's Keith - and he seems to have no trouble (he had a used box of condoms after all). But what did he do that was so wrong? Ppl say he didn't open up or talk to Iris but he totally has. He has told her that her fixation on her virginity is an obstacle. He has told her that he doesn't at all want to be perceived as pushing her forward so it is up to her to guide him in their sex life. The fact that she flat out refuses to move forward with it, there is nothing he can do about that. And clearly Iris never took this seriously because if she was saving herself for her husband - well, he's right here!!

 

[configdotsys]

On 9/7/2019 at 8:41 AM, qtpye said:

If Raven and Amber wanted a relationship it would have happened by now. I know some people think heterosexual men and women can’t be friends but there are exceptions, particularly for childhood friends. Yes, there is an element of no one is attracted enough to take it to the next level, but you still can value the friendship itself.

I think there are way more exceptions than childhood friends. It surprises me that there are people who think that way. My circle of friends for over 20 years has consisted of marrieds and singles and there have been plenty of times that various groups sans spouses went to concerts or events that the others were not into or they had to work or whatever. Honorable, grown up people do not view these types of things as opportunities to cheat on their spouse. 

My prediction for next week:

Greg and Deonna will stay married and Greg will be a henpecked, whipped jellyfish.

Elizabeth and Jamie will stay married and divorce within a year.

Keith and Iris will divorce.

Amber and Matt will divorce.

[qtpye]

10 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

I think there are way more exceptions than childhood friends. It surprises me that there are people who think that way. My circle of friends for over 20 years has consisted of marrieds and singles and there have been plenty of times that various groups sans spouses went to concerts or events that the others were not into or they had to work or whatever. Honorable, grown up people do not view these types of things as opportunities to cheat on their spouse. 

My prediction for next week:

Greg and Deonna will stay married and Greg will be a henpecked, whipped jellyfish.

Elizabeth and Jamie will stay married and divorce within a year.

Keith and Iris will divorce.

Amber and Matt will divorce.

I feel the same way about heterosexual opposite sex friendships. It seems like a whole generation of people have taken Billy Crystal’s character from, Harry met Sally, as a personal guru for male/female relationships.

Edited September 8, 2019 by qtpye

[humbleopinion]

Amber will say yes because she is incapable of saying no...

Matt will say yes because he is a ginormous asshat but wants to look like a good guy.

Harry is wrong...

Millennials have seen their parents having platonic relationships so it is normal for them to be Ravens and Ambers... friends with no romantic hidden agendas...

 Amber said that she and Raven have been friends for 14 years and he is like a brother...seems he was there for her more than her own mother...

Sibling like relationships are as powerful as sibling relationships and to try to make them into potential romantic relationships just because they are close....but down the road... who knows.....

 Relationships are complicated...

Edited September 8, 2019 by humbleopinion

[Lindz]

I have guy friends. I don't find their looks attractive. Keep that unrequited love, unrequited cuz I won't reciprocate it. 😂 I want a man that's upfront, so going about it the friendship way isn't smart. If you're in the friendzone, you're gunna stay there. Men & women can be friends, but shouldn't when either is in a relationship, it's inappropriate. It's annoying not knowing the deal between Raven & Amber, but eh. It'll be a distant memory in a few weeks.

[cinsays]

3 hours ago, Mazzy said:

I don't understand all the Keith-hate. I will admit it doesn't make any sense at all that he is on this show. If anyone DOESN'T need help with a relationship I'd say it's Keith - and he seems to have no trouble (he had a used box of condoms after all). But what did he do that was so wrong? Ppl say he didn't open up or talk to Iris but he totally has. He has told her that her fixation on her virginity is an obstacle. He has told her that he doesn't at all want to be perceived as pushing her forward so it is up to her to guide him in their sex life. The fact that she flat out refuses to move forward with it, there is nothing he can do about that. And clearly Iris never took this seriously because if she was saving herself for her husband - well, he's right here!!

 

Glad someone agrees with me!  We don't see all their interactions, so who knows what happens off camera, but he seems to be liking her and open but she just is a cold fish with some rigid rules and he realizes that and is just waiting it out.  

[Elizzikra]

58 minutes ago, Lindz said:

I have guy friends. I don't find their looks attractive. Keep that unrequited love, unrequited cuz I won't reciprocate it. 😂 I want a man that's upfront, so going about it the friendship way isn't smart. If you're in the friendzone, you're gunna stay there. Men & women can be friends, but shouldn't when either is in a relationship, it's inappropriate. It's annoying not knowing the deal between Raven & Amber, but eh. It'll be a distant memory in a few weeks.

I totally disagree - there is no reason men and women can’t have friends if the opposite sex, whether they are in romantic relationships with other people or not. I have male friends; my husband has female friends. Nothing inappropriate about it. Why does there have to be?

[cinsays]

2 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

I totally disagree - there is no reason men and women can’t have friends if the opposite sex, whether they are in romantic relationships with other people or not. I have male friends; my husband has female friends. Nothing inappropriate about it. Why does there have to be?

yeah, I don't think you should have to end or avoid an opposite sex friendship because you are married

[Adeejay]

3 hours ago, Mazzy said:

I don't understand all the Keith-hate. I will admit it doesn't make any sense at all that he is on this show. If anyone DOESN'T need help with a relationship I'd say it's Keith - and he seems to have no trouble (he had a used box of condoms after all). But what did he do that was so wrong? Ppl say he didn't open up or talk to Iris but he totally has. He has told her that her fixation on her virginity is an obstacle. He has told her that he doesn't at all want to be perceived as pushing her forward so it is up to her to guide him in their sex life. The fact that she flat out refuses to move forward with it, there is nothing he can do about that. And clearly Iris never took this seriously because if she was saving herself for her husband - well, he's right here!!

 

Well said! I wish I could like this a hundred times. 

[karenbrady]

On 9/4/2019 at 10:00 PM, Ohwell said:

Cry me a river Amber.  

Also, I wouldn't want a dude named Raven.  

Thank you! I have a niece named Raven. That is NOT a unisex name.