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S23.E08: Week 8 - Hometown Dates


OnceSane
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3 minutes ago, Adeejay said:

Colton did not tell any of the ladies that he loves them.  He told them he was "falling in love" with them.  Big difference.  If memory serves, Ben was the only Bachelor to ever tell two women he loved them. 

Eh tomato , tomotto. That might mean something different on this show , but in real life it would still make you an asshole for saying it to all 4. 

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Cassie's family surprised me.   Her sisters look exactly like their mom with the weird sculpted nose and LA hair.   They were also so thin that they made Cassie look like the heifer size 2 of the family.   Sheesh.   Cassie has a very effortless casual look about her.   She's way too young though and she knows it.  It's too bad she can't figure a way out of this.

I didn't hear a word Caelynn's sister said because of her eyeshadow and eyelashes weighing her eyes down like a shiny metallic glop.  She came ready for her 1.2 minutes of fame with the boobs out.   Thirsty.

I wish Taysha's dad wouldn't have given in at the end.  I was really liking him.

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Colton is very attractive in a typical kind of way.   He's got a great body and a nice disposition.   He is also very charismatic at times and shows a lot of kindness despite having to memorize a lot of lines for this show.  His aspirational acting chops are getting better.   My question is why don't I have any reaction when the show opens with him showering with the water cascading down his muscular bod etc. etc.    If the tables were turned and the water was pouring slowing over a nearly naked lady I think the universal male response would at least be positive LOL.    He literally makes me feel nothing.  Is he a cartoon or CGI and I'm just next level?   HAHAHAHAHAHAH

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Cassie and her sister were so vapid. I couldn't handle it. She isn't ready for marriage, but it is clear that she is the one he wants.  

I'm so sick of the fantasy suite talk. I'm such a prude and seriously, if I were the F1 on any season, I'd be pissed if my fiancé was sleeping with someone else the day before we got engaged. If Colton is true to his word, the F1 will know who she is because he's only going to sleep with one. I'd be really, really pissed if for all his talk Colton slept with all of them. Again, I'm an old prude. 

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I’m just putting this out there.  Who was the Hannah family member with the short hair and balding area?  Honey, spare hair isn’t just for contestants.   

Hannah is a changeling, or she’s going to go from 100 to 49 in about 15 years. 

Fuck that etiquette heifer.  I would have shoved that whole bread in my mouth and then stuck some butter, about half a stick in. Like a feral dog.  Sorry, I had a bad experience with uppity ass people in Alabama and need to vent. 

I would rather hear about that Roz lady giving everyone in production hand jobs than hear Colton squealing about losing his virginity.  He sounds like he’s in 16 candles.

Edited by Mu Shu
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7 minutes ago, HappyDancex2 said:

    If the tables were turned and the water was pouring slowing over a nearly naked lady I think the universal male response would at least be positive LOL.    He literally makes me feel nothing.  Is he a cartoon or CGI and I'm just next level?   HAHAHAHAHAHAH

Well he is a virgin.  Of course us non-virgins are not going to feel like........ super-randy about him

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1 hour ago, JenE4 said:

I think the whole family Hannah thinks she’s actually marrying Colton. Mom is proud of her for falling in love on a TV show? Wait, Colton just told Hannah he’s falling in love with her, but didn’t he tell Caelynn the same thing? Oh, wow, the coming up, just had him telling Tayshia’s dad he’s falling in love with HER. Oh, Colton, no wonder why he has to jump over a wall...to avoid the mob with pitchforks coming after him for leading ALL of these women AND their families into thinking she’s The One!

All these comments have me hysterical.  I haven’t watched this show in a long time as it’s so out of touch.  All I’ve seen the past few weeks is this guy in the shower.  Should I be impressed with this man/child?  NO !  I liked Caelynn’s Father the best.  No bullshit.  He said it like it is.  Is it a new thing to tell all of them he’s falling in love with them?  What a douche.

I feel very accomplished after watching that episode.  That's how I eat my bread.  Well without the butter but still.   The reason why I eat it like that is because that way you can put a small amount in your mouth and chew it without biting into something and risk getting bread in your teeth.

If I'm by myself I put my feet up on the table and chew the bread as it hangs out of my mouth.  #carbconfessions

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5 minutes ago, hyacinth said:

At this point, we viewers deserve the same sort of hidden cameras that caught Robert Kraft so we get to see exactly what action goes on in the fantasy suites for Shallow Hal Colton and the Virgin Slayers.    Bring on the best sex they've ever felt!!    😝

I love his confidence LOL.   Tender.  Yep.

And the amount of reassurance he's going to need after?   Ugh.   Almost as awkward as Hannah G's rapping skillz.   I'm sure she comes off as super twee girl in her circle but that's just bad.

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Etiquette-correct bread-consumption in public is one thing, but it's just tight-assed to do the butter-it-bite-by-bite at home.  And if I remember correctly from my event-coordinating days, the really high-end dinners don't have bread anyway.  Now I'm having flashbacks to that job and remembering why it turned me into a socialist.

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So he probably won’t pick Tayshia but I find myself really enjoying their moments. I think they will turn into great friends when this is all over. I know she is not well liked but I continue to think she would be a great bachelorette. And, honestly, in real life, long term, Colton would probably work best with her. I think true friendship is the best foundation for a relationship.

I really liked Hannah G this ep. I know editing... but I couldn’t help it! I have her at #2 and, even though I like her, she seems too young to be bachelorette and I don’t want her on paradise (paradise ruins everyone I like). Hmmm...

Cassie and caelynn are actresses IMO.

These men always want the one who wants them the least so Cassie will win. Blah Can’t see them lasting.

Bryce was so cute!! And so love Tayshia’s dad!

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1 hour ago, jackjill89 said:

I'm so sick of the fantasy suite talk. I'm such a prude and seriously, if I were the F1 on any season, I'd be pissed if my fiancé was sleeping with someone else the day before we got engaged. If Colton is true to his word, the F1 will know who she is because he's only going to sleep with one. I'd be really, really pissed if for all his talk Colton slept with all of them. Again, I'm an old prude. 

yes, the way it's presented is - He gets to have sex with three women, and whomever performs the best in bed gets the final rose and the proposal.  

I miss when they referred to the fantasy suite dates as  "a chance to get to know each other without the cameras", as if they stayed up all night talking. 

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I always end up watching these home town episodes with a lot of pauses due to my heavy second hand embarrassment. The poor poor families...

I was mildly surprised to see Caelynn be the one sent home, though it would be too rational for someone on this show to synthesize those "dates" and come up with that everyone was obviously talking about Cassie all along, as she is no where close to being 'ready'.

The bigger issue though is that she is going through the motions and can't tell how she feels but thinks being chosen would be great! (And being chosen as 'ette? Even better!) I mean that whole hometown should have been sponsored by red flags as they were everrrywhere. But Colton has been fantasizing about her as his first time from the beginning and that's hard to give up on even when you are getting zero back from her beyond they love to make out. Sexual chemistry 10, amount of 'substance' to their "relationship"? I'll be nice and give it a 2.

I don't feel too bad for Bachelorette Caelynn though. Good auditioning tonight. Nice combo of broken hearted but still slightly hopeful that 'her person' is out there and maybe if she for example had 30ish guys all in one room only looking at her she could figure it out...

I just think Taysha wants to "win the game". I see nothing between them though.

Oh poor Hannah, she's not long for this show and too sweet for BiP, maybe she'll find a real person to date possibly get engaged to.

I would make the producers tell me who is getting the first Fantasy Suite, because I would NOT want to be that woman. First times often suck, no matter how "into it" Colton may be odds are he won't live up to his own billing.

But once he's gotten through it once and doesn't die he'll be loosened up and probably even want to try again just to have something to compare with. Imagine all that bottled up sexual tension finally being released? Boy is going to be on a tear with anyone who says yes. Look out ladies!

Edited by Wandering Snark
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2 hours ago, EllenB said:

Etiquette-correct bread-consumption in public is one thing, but it's just tight-assed to do the butter-it-bite-by-bite at home.  And if I remember correctly from my event-coordinating days, the really high-end dinners don't have bread anyway.  Now I'm having flashbacks to that job and remembering why it turned me into a socialist.

So what do you do if they only have one butter plate on the table?  Can you imagine having to ask them to pass the butter 17 times just so you can get through dinner?

Edited by Mswldflwr
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5 hours ago, nlkm9 said:

Tayisha, girl you are so cute but take it down a notch- she is so so so competitive and i went from loving her to not seeing any sincerity. She wants to win. I think if he dumps her it will be crocodile tears and she will move on immediately . I am worried about Hannah tho- she is soo sweet. Caellyn has a totally flat affect- i feel bad for her, i think her attack has really screwed her up and i hope she can get some help. Cassie- as Elaine on Seinfeld says “ fake fake fake fake fake” so I’m rooting for Hannah. Lol.

I can't tell if Cassie is fake, or just so immature.  I had a hard time listening to her - every other word 'like'.

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1 hour ago, tinkerbell said:

yes, the way it's presented is - He gets to have sex with three women, and whomever performs the best in bed gets the final rose and the proposal.  

I miss when they referred to the fantasy suite dates as  "a chance to get to know each other without the cameras", as if they stayed up all night talking. 

Doesn’t it feel like Cassie and caelynn were the final 2 but he couldn’t bear sleeping with caelynn and breaking her heart or even Cassie’s if she found out they slept together?  I had a weird feeling that cutting her this round was merciful.  Tayshia is the easy boot later.  And Hannah doesn’t seem like she has a lot of chemistry with him.

when was the last time the guy slept with all 3 and then proposed?  I’m newer but I haven’t seen it yet on either franchise side.  It’s come out later that the lead didn’t sleep with all of the potentials.

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9 minutes ago, Mswldflwr said:

So what do you do if they only have one butter plate on the table?  Can you imagine having to ask them to pass the butter 17 times just so you can get through dinner?

You take a chunk of butter and put it on your bread plate....then each time you want a nibble you have your own butter stash.

Or you can just shove the whole roll in your mouth and chase it with a knob of butter and skip the pretenses.

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4 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

Tayshia's dad is not here to mess around! I love him.

Usually thats how it goes. The same on Batchelorette, they tell the contestants that either they love them, or is "falling in love with them" or some variation. 

It used to be forbidden. Until one season it caused a ton of drama, and is seems almost expected, which is awful. Now Colton is taking it to a whole new level telling each of the F4 (not, say, just F2) that he's falling in love with them. I hope the Women Telling All ream him a new one! His love isn't worth much, is it?

I never believed Caelyn's professions of love for Colton, no matter how hard she tried to convince herself. Her family was terrifying, especially that sister with the humongous outsized bazoongas spilling all over. They were all ready for their TV moments, except Stepdad John. He seemed genuine. I felt bad that she kept calling him John, while he referred to her as his daughter.

Hannah is so dang cute, I really want her to be the Bachelorette. Please! But her date was dorky. Sadz.

Tayshia's Dad for the Dad Rose. He was awesome. I wonder what kind of federal law enforcement officer her brother is, and what her dad does for a living.

I love that Cassie won't lie about "falling in love" with Colton until she's good and ready. That's as it should be.

So what's the surprise no one knew? Colton is really a woman? Or impotent? Finally, we get the gate jumping scene. Chances are good it will be something lame and uninteresting.

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17 minutes ago, Mswldflwr said:

So what do you do if they only have one butter plate on the table?  Can you imagine having to ask them to pass the butter 17 times just so you can get through dinner?

You never put the butter directly on your roll from the butter server.   You take the amount of butter you want from the butter plate, put it on your bread plate, and then pass the butter plate to others.  Then you use the butter from your bread plate to butter pieces of your bread. 

I learned this when I dated a guy whose family had these proper manners at the dinner table.  I swear, they were not prim and proper about anything else,  but boy did I feel like a big dumb klutz when I went there for thanksgiving.  There are a LOT of rules.  And I broke all of them.

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4 hours ago, Mu Shu said:

So, like Cassie?  Is a like, speech, like? Pathologist?

get the fuck right out.  Whoever she’s speech pathologizing will, like? End up, like, illiterate?  She should have flunked out.  

I despise uptalk.  It makes so called intelligent adult women sound like insecure second graders. 

HAAAAAAAA - just noticed that she is a speech pathologist!!  I am, well, speechless!

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1 hour ago, Wandering Snark said:

I don't feel too bad for Bachelorette Caelynn though. Good auditioning tonight. Nice combo of broken hearted but still slightly hopeful that 'her person' is out there and maybe if she for example had 30ish guys all in one room only looking at her she could figure it out...

I would make the producers tell me who is getting the first Fantasy Suite, because I would NOT want to be that woman. First times often suck, no matter how "into it" Colton may be odds are he won't live up to his own billing.

Caelyn was trying so hard for that B'ette spot with her tearful farewell (sob)... she can never find love (sob)... but she hasn't lost hope!

ITA about the fantasy suites. Are they ALL thinking he'll put out for them? And if he doesn't, will they assume they're the losers? And since when is he supposed to boink all three finalists? That's just so gross. It used to be completely implied, but the contestants are assuming There Will Be Sex (as opposed to extra getting-to-know-you time away from the cameras.)

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32 minutes ago, Mswldflwr said:

So what do you do if they only have one butter plate on the table?  Can you imagine having to ask them to pass the butter 17 times just so you can get through dinner?

The fancy dinners I had to organize usually had individual artsy blobs of butter on each bread/roll plate, like a sweet little elf had squatted down and left a pale yellow fancy poo on the plate.

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7 hours ago, hyacinth said:

At this point, we viewers deserve the same sort of hidden cameras that caught Robert Kraft so we get to see exactly what action goes on in the fantasy suites for Shallow Hal Colton and the Virgin Slayers.    Bring on the best sex they've ever felt!!    😝

Ew!  Two minutes of fumbling, a mess to clean up, and then snoring. 

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9 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Yeah divorce!  So uncommon.  So weird.  😁

Yeah and all over Instagram with a boyfriend until the nite she left for bachelor. You know, as much as i don’t care for her now, Tayshia insincerity and good looks would make her a perfect bachelorette. She can lie with the best of them and dazzle everyone with her good looks ( i think she is very pretty)

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4 hours ago, Andromeda said:

Caelyn was trying so hard for that B'ette spot with her tearful farewell (sob)... she can never find love (sob)... but she hasn't lost hope!

ITA about the fantasy suites. Are they ALL thinking he'll put out for them? And if he doesn't, will they assume they're the losers? And since when is he supposed to boink all three finalists? That's just so gross. It used to be completely implied, but the contestants are assuming There Will Be Sex (as opposed to extra getting-to-know-you time away from the cameras.)

Funny how things change— the first season, one of the final girls ( Shannon) has never even kissed him and she really challenged him on the fantasy suite card . I rewatched a few years ago and it was so interesting. Obviously so much better because none of the girls were auditioning for anything.

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5 hours ago, HappyDancex2 said:

Doesn’t it feel like Cassie and caelynn were the final 2 but he couldn’t bear sleeping with caelynn and breaking her heart or even Cassie’s if she found out they slept together?  I had a weird feeling that cutting her this round was merciful.  Tayshia is the easy boot later.  And Hannah doesn’t seem like she has a lot of chemistry with him.

when was the last time the guy slept with all 3 and then proposed?  I’m newer but I haven’t seen it yet on either franchise side.  It’s come out later that the lead didn’t sleep with all of the potentials.

Hahha the creator of the show bragged about blob and how he slept with 51/2 girls. His dumping of the runner up was brutal. And jessie palmers dumping ( the girl immediately said “ well then last nite was in appropriate “ and one more, Matt’s dumping of Chelsea and Deanna’s dumping of Jeremy. There used to be a lot of real feeling in this show before it became a launching pad for other things . 

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6 hours ago, tinkerbell said:

Tayshia, even with her family, talks about "my previous relationship,"  instead of saying his first name, or "my ex", or "my ex-husband."   or even "that asshole I married."   it seemed very stilted an not at all natural.

The whole time i wondered if she was referencing her ex that she was with all over Instagram that she dumped the nite before she left for the show

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6 hours ago, angelamh66 said:

Cassie’s family is just impossibly good looking.  

Except for Cassie whose eyes are too small and her jaw too big.  I thought she seemed like a 15 year-old brat, interrupting her father to yell at him for telling her what to do.  He was saying pretty much what the other fathers said and were nicely thanked for caring so much.  She has no feelings for Colton but doesn't want to say it because she wants to stay on the show long enough to be Bachelorette.  Katie was right and she is Wrong Reasons, but I have no pity for Colton who was leading on at least three women last night.

Etiquette classes because in The South we have good manners.  Not like in The North where we all eat our soup beans with our hands and fart at the table.  I lived in Georgia for a while and had people explaining  things like that to me all the time.  It was amazing the nice things they thought were only done below the Mason Dixon line.

I do wonder about a nice virgin gentleman from any place, who can't kiss a woman in public without cupping her behind in his hands.  He was too handsy in front of the parents, too. Don't rub her thigh in front of Dad!  I think that's why he was called a ... guy.

I've predicted Hanna B as the winner all along, but I did notice Tayisha was the one he couldn't stop kissing while his limo waited.  I loved how Tayisha  got all the best features from her two average looking parents, so did her brothers who were super cute.

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It really bugged when Caelyn said to Cassie "I love you. Go get engaged." WTF was that? Those two irritate me to no end.

I wish he'd pick Hannah or Taisha (I know I spelled it wrong). But I just know it will be vapid Cassie. I liked her at first, but mid season something changed and now I don't like her at all. Hannah is dim, but she seems so sweet. There's something calculated about Cassie. 

They never used to say anything to the contestants about their feelings. That "I'm falling for you crap started the last several seasons." 

Edited by jackjill89
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12 hours ago, Mu Shu said:

So, like Cassie?  Is a like, speech, like? Pathologist?

get the fuck right out.  Whoever she’s speech pathologizing will, like? End up, like, illiterate?  She should have flunked out.  

I despise uptalk.  It makes so called intelligent adult women sound like insecure second graders. 

In my mind, there's a difference between speech and language.  So, someone could be a great speech pathologist (focusing on the actual sound of spoken words) while still having a limited (or annoying) vocabulary.  I'd take all of Cassie's "likes" over Hannah's vocal-fry-sounding voice.  

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2 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

do wonder about a nice virgin gentleman from any place, who can't kiss a woman in public without cupping her behind in his hands.  He was too handsy in front of the parents, too. Don't rub her thigh in front of Dad!  I think that's why he was called a ... guy.

Yep. The scene with Cassie on the beach. She's  wearing a bikini, so to kiss her he's  handling her bare ass.  Then, yeah, way too handy in front of her parents. When you meet the parents you want to give them the idea that you are respectful and in love. NOT that you can't wait to have sex with their daughter. 

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1 hour ago, Jaclyn88 said:

I find Cassie to be gorgeous and naturally at that. But the way she speaks is like a 14 year old between her whining, use of the word like, and inability to string a sentence together. Now I see why her scenes with Colton throughout the season were left on the cutting room floor. She can't have a conversation.

I agree...it is like we saw the real Cassie at home with her family, and there isn't much there.  She is a sweet girl, but she isn't very mature or good at communication. 

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I thought last night made it obvious that Hannah is the "winner." With all of the other Dads, he carefully phrased his question "if it ends up that your daughter is the one, would I have your permission?" With Hannah's Dad he just straight out asked "can I marry your daughter?"

Now, I've thought she was the one for a while now, especially given how little they've shown of them together other than their one-on-one date (which was bordering on inappropriate for primetime ABC!). If they had shown more of them would it have been too obvious?

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14 hours ago, Adeejay said:

So, Taysha's Dad raised her to make good decisions, and yet, here she is a divorcee.  Just saying.

That's hardly fair. We don't know what precipitated the divorce. For all we know, the divorce was the good decision she made in her situation.

14 hours ago, JenE4 said:

But just 20 seconds into the family Cassie, I think this dad’s “I don’t know Colton but he seems like...a guy” is the best yet!

Oh my gosh, I loved this. What an absolutely perfect description for our sweet but bland Bachelor. 🙂

I seem to be the only one but I absolutely despise Caelynn. She's incredibly manipulative. First with Colton when she tricked him into keeping her by appealing to his protective nature when she talked about how scared she was about this process ("Take care of me, you big ole strong man, you") instead of addressing the questions he had about what Alabama Hannah re: the way she acted during their pageant. Then with her stepfather. My God. I was absolutely gobsmacked. He was trying to talk to her about some very legitimate concerns he had regarding this whole thing and she bamboozled him into forgetting about all of that with talk of how she's never missed her biological father because of what an amazing dad he is to her. She's incredibly cunning. If she is the next Bachelorette I truly don't think I could watch that season because I wouldn't believe one word coming out of her mouth. That and her horrific reaction to Tayshia's comments to Colton in the last episode ("I would never tear down a woman"/"That fucking bitch better watch her back"). It is a very thin veneer of sweetness that covers that giant pile of shit.

Look, I get where everyone is coming from about the whole asking for permission thing. And it sounds even worse when you hear it four times in a row from the same guy to the fathers of four different women. But I just don't see a problem with asking for his blessing. Mr. Lily spoke to my dad before he proposed because my father's an old-fashioned man and would've deemed it the height of disrespect if he'd proposed without a conversation with him first. But I warned Mr. Lily to ask for his blessing and not his permission, my argument being, what are you going to do if he says no? Family get-togethers would be a lot more uncomfortable if my father always thought of my husband's first act in becoming a member of his family was one of "disobedience." 🙂

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5 hours ago, nlkm9 said:

Hahha the creator of the show bragged about blob and how he slept with 51/2 girls. His dumping of the runner up was brutal. And jessie palmers dumping ( the girl immediately said “ well then last nite was in appropriate “ and one more, Matt’s dumping of Chelsea and Deanna’s dumping of Jeremy. There used to be a lot of real feeling in this show before it became a launching pad for other things . 

Hmmmm I don't know any of these people.   I guess that's why the whole fantasy suite thing seems anticlimactic (pun intended) to me because it seems to be all for show.   I haven't seen a series yet where there was any confirmed banging of multiples.   I thought what's his face whose name I already forgot banged Raven but it turned out to not have happened apparently.   But I remember when I first started watching I was incredulous at the premise of Fantasy Suites and either the Bachelor or Bachelorette having sex with all 3 people that week and then picking a winner.   And also getting rid of someone right after LOL.   Just seems odd and cruel.   

I mean I guess IRL you can be dating several people and sleeping with some of them and then decide that one is really the best out of the lot.....I think this format is so compressed though so it seems strange.   Plus you are living with and knowing the other girls/guys.....that makes a difference to me.   It seems different when you don't know the other people or what's going on.  

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This episode was, I think, the second time they played the voiceover of Colton talking about his first time, which I'll paraphrase as, "It's going to be tender and wonderful and the best thing ever." I just think, "Oh, honey. Not to burst your bubble, but it's going to be awkward, and sloppy, and it will last less than a minute." 

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