S11.E14: Lost in translation

[Keywestclubkid]

Eva and the ladies continue their celebration with a bachelorette party that has a questionable start and an unexpected visitor, some epic battles go down during a traditional samurai lesson a long standing rivalry finally starts to fade.. original air date 2/10/2019

I didn’t see a topic for this episode yet 

[swankie]

Damn Nene!  Way to make Gregg's cancer all about you.  This heffa is definitely not a nurturer.  I wouldn't be friends with her if she paid me.  The way she is treating Tanya sucks.  You're supposed to be her friend and you tell her you don't give a damn about her relationship?!  Nene is always telling other people that they aren't a good friend, but she is the worst friend.  Her attitude is so stank!

[parrotlover]

Only saw a few minutes switching back and forth from the Grammys on commercial breaks, but why was Gregg having another surgery?

[announcergirl]

It sounded like he was reversing a colostomy bag to no longer have one. Can’t be sure though.

They had a point with the strippers socks. I can’t stand to see a naked man in socks. He seemed like maybe he danced for men? My question was what is appropriate with a Japanese stripper? Can I treat them like strippers in Upper Marlboro, MD? 🤣🤣Can I touch shot? 

[swankie]

15 minutes ago, parrotlover said:

Only saw a few minutes switching back and forth from the Grammys on commercial breaks, but why was Gregg having another surgery?

Nene said it's a reversal so he doesn't have a bag so I assume he had a colostomy and is getting it reversed.  

[Keywestclubkid]

Them screaming take off your socks to the stripper was hilarious 

[parrotlover]

Thanks announcergirl and swankie!

[CrinkleCutCat]

Some touching moments in this episode.... but the preview for the rest of the season?? Woweeeeee!!!

Edited February 11, 2019 by CrinkleCutCat

[nexxie]

1 hour ago, swankie said:

Damn Nene!  Way to make Gregg's cancer all about you.  This heffa is definitely not a nurturer.  I wouldn't be friends with her if she paid me.  The way she is treating Tanya sucks.  You're supposed to be her friend and you tell her you don't give a damn about her relationship?!  Nene is always telling other people that they aren't a good friend, but she is the worst friend.  Her attitude is so stank!

Really. Sounds like Gregg’s cancer is getting in the way of Nene’s usual adoration/attention/agenda.

[biakbiak]

Do none of these women know the difference between a cucumber and a pickle?

[swankie]

I thought it was in very bad taste for Marlo to mention how she fought with knives in the past.  I heard she slashed a girl's face so bad that she later committed suicide.  Not something I would want to brag about Marlo.  

[biakbiak]

27 minutes ago, swankie said:

I thought it was in very bad taste for Marlo to mention how she fought with knives in the past.  I heard she slashed a girl's face so bad that she later committed suicide.  Not something I would want to brag about Marlo.  

She killed herself six years after the incident with no corroboration that it had anything to do with the incident. According to Marlo and something that could probably be looked up the woman testified on Marlo’s behalf at sentencing and wanted her to get less the 6 months that she got. 

[Jade Foxx]

4 hours ago, swankie said:

Damn Nene!  Way to make Gregg's cancer all about you.  This heffa is definitely not a nurturer.  I wouldn't be friends with her if she paid me.  The way she is treating Tanya sucks.  You're supposed to be her friend and you tell her you don't give a damn about her relationship?!  Nene is always telling other people that they aren't a good friend, but she is the worst friend.  Her attitude is so stank!

Typical narcissist. Nene is heinous. 

[link417]

Ugh, Nene sulking around the bachelorette party like she’s some moody teenager. Get over it and yourself!

More of the women having fun, please! The pickle scene was hilarious, even Kandi and Porsha shared a high-five. Nice shoutout to Swinging Richards, LOL. (When I first heard the name a few years ago, it took me forever to “get” it!)

LMAO at Eva’s hair getting caught in the car door. 

Shamari is goofy as hell, but not in a fun way. Her THs annoy the hell out of me.

Now we ALLLLL know Greg is not the only person that can piss Nene off in five seconds.

[biakbiak]

6 minutes ago, link417 said:

Ugh, Nene sulking around the bachelorette party like she’s some moody teenager. Get over it and yourself!

I agree though I did laugh at Kandi’s reaction to Tanya being so on for the dumb games that no one including Eva was into. I don’t know why they didn’t just go to a club but I imagine they have somewhat limited filming options because they can’t afford to license the music playing at them, hence the tiny clips of them when they were dancing.

[hoosiermom]

All I could think about was what happened to all that beautiful food that no one appeared to eat much of? I would have chomped the shit out of it!

[Baltimore Betty]

On ‎2‎/‎11‎/‎2019 at 12:22 AM, biakbiak said:

Do none of these women know the difference between a cucumber and a pickle?

I winced at their immature pickle/cucumber game, it was like watching a bunch of 12 year olds.  

NeNe, if it it's not all about her she is not happy.  it was nice of Greg to send flowers but all I can think about is the huge expense and they were going home the next day.

The one time NeNe could have worn one of her kimono's but did not...everyone else did. 

Marlo's wigs, ugh. Terrible. 

Edited February 12, 2019 by Baltimore Betty
Messy spelling.

[Mr. Miner]

Nene sucks! I could not care less about her or that old man that carries her purse.

[swankie]

6 hours ago, biakbiak said:

She killed herself six years after the incident with no corroboration that it had anything to do with the incident. According to Marlo and something that could probably be looked up the woman testified on Marlo’s behalf at sentencing and wanted her to get less the 6 months that she got. 

I'm just going by what I read.  If I was her I still wouldn't make reference to it if for anything else the woman's family could be watching.  I still say it was in bad taste.

[TV Diva Queen]

Shamari in the talking heads with the black hair is just stunning. The over processed blonde look...not so much. 

[luckyroll3]

Nene sucked all the air out of the bachelorette party.  They enable her way too much, especially when she walked in and started in on Tanya again.  Just because she's having a bad day, doesn't mean gets to be a dick to everybody.

9 hours ago, nexxie said:

Really. Sounds like Gregg’s cancer is getting in the way of Nene’s usual adoration/attention/agenda.

Yup.  It's like she's mad that his cancer is getting in the way of his chauffeur, butler, stylist, chef, manager duties (or whatever else he did for her).

I always enjoy when the ladies have fun together.  As dumb as the bachelorette party was, it was a nice gesture by Tanya and it was great to see the ladies being silly.  And I would totally be Kandi showing up in actual pajamas!

[For Cereals]

I saw Nene doing a lot of dabbing at her eyes, but I never saw any actual tears...

Tanya seems nice but she’s way too happy cheerleader for me.  She isn’t  messy enough for this show.

[biakbiak]

51 minutes ago, swankie said:

I'm just going by what I read.  If I was her I still wouldn't make reference to it if for anything else the woman's family could be watching.  I still say it was in bad taste.

And I was just pointing out in all the googleable stories about her suicide there is no indication that they were connected.

[RHJunkie]

I'm glad Kandi apologized for her messiness as it relates to Dennis. She may have heard plenty of things but she was definitely messy with the way she was giving her people air time so they could dish about Dennis. Hopefully, she means it and this is the last we see her gossip squad talking about it. It's not that interesting Kandi...never was.

Tanya's idea of a bachelorette would work for some people...definitely not for that crew and definitely not for good TV. The backup 'pickles' came in handy. But unless they dried them off really well, I'm pretty sure those were cucumbers (before any pickling process took place to turn them into 'pickles')...but that was just my particularity trying to figure that out, lol. Tanya's hosting at the party seemed more like her attempt at showmanship...it didn't ring as authentic though I do think she tends to be naturally cheery person which I think is nice but certainly don't think she'll last past this season unless she really steps it up in the drama department though I don't know if she'll want to do that.

I felt bad for Nene when she was talking to Cynthia but my empathy dwindled the more she spoke. For someone who wanted everyone to go easy on her because she was dealing with things and had 'feelings', she doesn't offer that kind of understanding to others when she gets into a spat with them. If she's a bystander, sure. But when she feels she has reason to be slighted, Nene holds on to it for dear life and tries to make you pay. The idea that Nene is being a rollercoaster on this trip because of her personal issues with Greg would require me to forget the fact that I've seen Nene in action long before Greg was diagnosed with cancer. I don't doubt that it must be tough being the primary caretaker and that he must demand a lot of attention - I just can't get on board with this notion that Nene should get some free pass for her own behaviour doesn't mean you can put your shit on other people and think they need to simply take it.

Was it just me or did it look like the women barely touched their dinner? All of their plates looked full as they were leaving. I can't imagine what the kitchen was feeling when they saw all that food go back.

[bichonblitz]

How dare NeNe behave that way at Eva's bachelorette? She is beyond hateful and obnoxious and the most ungracious woman I have ever seen. I'm glad they all mostly ignored her. 

However, Andy Cohen and all the ass kissing celebs he has on his WWHL show worship the ground NeNe walks on. They also all worship Bethenny from RHONYC This is why they both act the entitled way they do.  

[politichick]

I know that Nene sounds selfish, but few people can understand what a caretaker goes through and the enormous burdens they bear unless you go through it yourself. Part of her tough talk is likely a facade in part because she doesn't want to seem vulnerable or weak, and she's really super scared about Gregg's health and the possibility of losing her husband and her child losing his dad. There have been many ups and downs but they've been together for eons. And who is helping her keep it together?

Tanya needs to get over herself in my opinion and just let it go. She knows Nene can be mean and that she's going through something so just let that shit go. She gave less thought to her childish bachelorette party. I think we saw just snippets of that and they likely ate more of the food than we saw, but it was way too much food to begin with. Why would she order a hundred burgers? Maybe the hotel staff got some free goodies. If they're untouched, why not?

Those "pickles" were actually persian cucumbers, i think. And as dicks they were pretty damned limp! What the hell did Marlo drink at the club? I need to look at that 4 am scene again.

It was nice and very grownup of Kandi to genuinely apologize to Porsha. 

The previews look crazy!

[Juliegirlj]

What did Greg do........? I don’t believe Nene’s pouting is only from the stresses of Greg’s cancer. I think it may be related to something financial. As in- Greg made some bad financial decisions. 

Kandi sure cries easily. However I appreciated her heartfelt apology to Porsha. 

[Neurochick]

35 minutes ago, politichick said:

I know that Nene sounds selfish, but few people can understand what a caretaker goes through and the enormous burdens they bear unless you go through it yourself. Part of her tough talk is likely a facade in part because she doesn't want to seem vulnerable or weak, and she's really super scared about Gregg's health and the possibility of losing her husband and her child losing his dad. There have been many ups and downs but they've been together for eons. And who is helping her keep it together?

Thanks for saying this.  I may not like Nene but in reality, I don't know how well I would do if I were in her situation.  I don't think anybody really knows until it happens to them.

[wanderingstar]

I wonder if Nene realizes how terribly she came across in this episode. Her main complaint seems to be that Gregg's cancer is keeping him from attending to his duties as her manservant. Ugh! 

And if she was going to spend the bachelorette party rolling her eyes and snarking,  she should've just stayed away.  

Edited February 11, 2019 by Gillian Rosh

[beaker73]

1 hour ago, politichick said:

I know that Nene sounds selfish, but few people can understand what a caretaker goes through and the enormous burdens they bear unless you go through it yourself. Part of her tough talk is likely a facade in part because she doesn't want to seem vulnerable or weak, and she's really super scared about Gregg's health and the possibility of losing her husband and her child losing his dad. There have been many ups and downs but they've been together for eons. And who is helping her keep it together?

Thank you for this.  

Look--I don't like Nene, but as some who is in her position I can sympathize with what she's feeling.   You do everything you can to stay positive and be strong for your loved one. You don't always have an outlet for your feelings because you don't want that person to know how scared you are, so you bottle it up and eventually you break.  

[nexxie]

46 minutes ago, Gillian Rosh said:

I wonder if Nene realizes how terribly she came across in this episode. Her main complaint seems to be that Gregg's cancer is keeping him from attending to his duties as her manservant. Ugh! 

And if she was going to spend the bachelorette party rolling her eyes and snarking,  she should've just stayed away.  

Nene can’t stand for someone else to be the center of attention, for any reason - she makes Gregg’s illness about her the same way she makes a party to celebrate a friend about her. I’ve known people like this - people with narcissistic personality disorder.

[Neurochick]

1 hour ago, beaker73 said:

Thank you for this.  

Look--I don't like Nene, but as some who is in her position I can sympathize with what she's feeling.   You do everything you can to stay positive and be strong for your loved one. You don't always have an outlet for your feelings because you don't want that person to know how scared you are, so you bottle it up and eventually you break.  

I agree.  I don't think someone has a personality disorder, just because they don't behave "properly" or how society says they should behave.  Not everything needs a psychiatric diagnosis.

[Dance4Life]

I am confused!  Why all the violent outbursts this season?  Porsha is a breath of fresh air but then again....in tiny gulps. She is gonna be a great mom...though PJ gonna be spoiled hopefully not bratty.

I am here campaigning for #TeamPeach🍑 on Celebrity Big Brother. Tamar and Kandi are both houseguests. America’s Favorite Houseguest gets an additional $25,000 prize.  Support your favorite Peach and vote here.

Yes, Tamar and Kandi are still in the house and made Final 5!

https://www.cbs.com/shows/celebrity-big-brother/news/1009054/how-to-vote-for-america-s-favorite-houseguest-of-celebrity-big-brother-season-2/

Edited February 11, 2019 by Dance4Life

[hoosiermom]

Well, I for one do resent Nene’s attitude towards Greg. I took care of my husband by myself,at home when he had terminal cancer. I was also taking care of 2 young daughters. He made me promise not to take him to a hospital and wanted to die at home. I am a nurse so was able to do it. I did have hospice come in the last week. There wasn’t a thing I wouldn’t have done for him. Nene should have stayed home. She wasn’t enjoying herself and was just sour around everyone. What was her point  in going? Not saying she shouldn’t get a break from Greg,but geeze,at least put the time to good use!

[kassa]

My friend's husband had the same cancer Greg has and it's a rough, rough road.  (He chose chemo in addition to/not instead of vegetables).  Caretakers have a hard time, absolutely.  But Nene wasn't snippy or or irritable, she didn't retreat  -- she put on a PERFORMANCE of her displeasure at multiple opportunities.  It would be one thing if she was unnaturally quiet and kind of a downer in energy level from her usual life of the party self, but quite another to still demand to be the focus of the party in the state she was in.

I practically cheered when they basically ignored her. That's the approach with passive aggressive people just DEMANDING that you suck up to them to find out what's wrong so that they can center themselves.  Could be she tried to stay away and was ordered to attend, and they recognized that her open contempt was for the show runners and not them.  

I give Kandi a pass on the food thing.  She was hangry.  If I've spent 20 hrs on planes and in airports, I need something to EAT.  And if you serve me food you know in advance I don't eat (seafood), a handful of side veg isn't going to cure the hangry.   And the people setting up the dinner knew she wouldn't eat most of it, which has got to be annoying after x years on the show. I'm going to assume there would have been things on the menu that she would have happily eaten, but they were not provided. 

[DrSparkles]

Did y’all see whatshername get locked out of her room?!

[AuntiePam]

Looks like Nene is grieving in anticipation of Greg's death.  She certainly isn't doing much as a caretaker, at least not the hands-on kind.  I haven't watched most of the season, but did she ever help him with his ostomy bag?  Did she drive him to medical appointments?  Did she clean up any vomit?  Wipe any butts? 

Or did she just stay in the same house? 

I'm genuinely curious.  I just don't think Nene cares all that much about what Greg is going through.  She can't relate to how it affects him -- the man who's facing death.  Yeah, her life will change -- has changed -- but she's still living privilege.

(I cared for a terminal spouse too, but only for a few months.  His cancer was quick.)

[Keywestclubkid]

Marlo sluring to the manager tell me I’m the most beautiful while locked out of her room was gold him telling her he needs ID and her you remember me I wore this hat....

[biakbiak]

44 minutes ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Marlo sluring to the manager tell me I’m the most beautiful while locked out of her room was gold him telling her he needs ID and her you remember me I wore this hat....

The best part was production just standing their recording it not helping either one. 

[luckyroll3]

5 hours ago, DrSparkles said:

Did y’all see whatshername get locked out of her room?!

48 minutes ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Marlo sluring to the manager tell me I’m the most beautiful while locked out of her room was gold him telling her he needs ID and her you remember me I wore this hat....

Yeah, I'm still dying over, "how many other beautiful black women have you seen in this hotel?!?!"  LMAO!

Edited February 12, 2019 by luckyroll3

[ninjago]

Nene's self-absorption and lack of grace is what has made her a reality TV star, and it probably also means she is particularly poorly suited for being a caretaker.  And Greg seems to be a worse than average patient/grump.  

But I think Nene seems like she is tired and old, beyond just this stress.  Of all the grande dames on these shows-LVP, Ramona, Vicki-Nene has been on a hard hustle for a longest time.  And there's no end in sight.  She's the sole breadwinner and she helps support her children and her grandchildren.  I don't like her, but I have sympathy for her.

She said something at dinner, about having other problems she didn't want to get into.  Anyone know what that was about?

[Neurochick]

A reason Nene might have to work harder than others.

Edited February 12, 2019 by Neurochick

[Rlb8031]

17 hours ago, AuntiePam said:

Looks like Nene is grieving in anticipation of Greg's death.  She certainly isn't doing much as a caretaker, at least not the hands-on kind.  I haven't watched most of the season, but did she ever help him with his ostomy bag?  Did she drive him to medical appointments?  Did she clean up any vomit?  Wipe any butts? 

Or did she just stay in the same house? 

I'm genuinely curious.  I just don't think Nene cares all that much about what Greg is going through.  She can't relate to how it affects him -- the man who's facing death.  Yeah, her life will change -- has changed -- but she's still living privilege.

(I cared for a terminal spouse too, but only for a few months.  His cancer was quick.)

See, I'm not gonna shame her for this. We only see a very small portion of their lives that they are willing to share.

She would only be seen doing this if Greg was comfortable having that much of his illness shared on tv. He isn't required to put his health struggles out there for entertainment so that Nene has a storyline, but his failure to do so doesn't necessarily mean that she wasn't engaged in helping him in this way either. It just means that it may not have been part of their tv lives. 

I know how hard caring for loved ones is, so I'm giving everyone here the benefit of the doubt and assuming the best possible scenario.

[Apprentice79]

On ‎2‎/‎11‎/‎2019 at 4:52 PM, kassa said:

My friend's husband had the same cancer Greg has and it's a rough, rough road.  (He chose chemo in addition to/not instead of vegetables).  Caretakers have a hard time, absolutely.  But Nene wasn't snippy or or irritable, she didn't retreat  -- she put on a PERFORMANCE of her displeasure at multiple opportunities.  It would be one thing if she was unnaturally quiet and kind of a downer in energy level from her usual life of the party self, but quite another to still demand to be the focus of the party in the state she was in.

I practically cheered when they basically ignored her. That's the approach with passive aggressive people just DEMANDING that you suck up to them to find out what's wrong so that they can center themselves.  Could be she tried to stay away and was ordered to attend, and they recognized that her open contempt was for the show runners and not them.  

I give Kandi a pass on the food thing.  She was hangry.  If I've spent 20 hrs on planes and in airports, I need something to EAT.  And if you serve me food you know in advance I don't eat (seafood), a handful of side veg isn't going to cure the hangry.   And the people setting up the dinner knew she wouldn't eat most of it, which has got to be annoying after x years on the show. I'm going to assume there would have been things on the menu that she would have happily eaten, but they were not provided. 

Kandi should know that Japanese restaurants do not just serve seafood. They serve other types of meat as well.  Years ago, I used to be wary of Japanese food myself, thinking it was all raw fish.  I was gobsmacked to learn how diverse their food is, you just have to have an open mind about culinary that is not your own, especially, when you are traveling abroad. 

Nene is just nasty about everything. She is always angry, aggressive, nasty for petty stuff or for no reason at all.  Even if Greg was not sick, she would find somebody to demean and bully. I loved season 1 Nene because she was such a hoot. Then, she went Hollywood and she became intolerable. 

Edited February 12, 2019 by Apprentice79

[kassa]

30 minutes ago, Apprentice79 said:

Kandi should know that Japanese Restaurants do not just serve seafood. They serve other types of meat as well.  

Did they order their own food, though?  I  might have missed it if they did.  I took it as a planned "event" dinner that had disregarded one of the guests.  If she had a menu and didn't go for non-fish protein, that's on her. 

[lezlers]

Nene absolutely CANNOT handle all the attention not being on HER.  She is petty, mean narcissistic.  I think that's the real reason she's dealing with Gregg the way she is.   Everyone is sympathizing with him and no one is showering her with sympathy and attention and she CANNOT handle it.  So then when Tanya dared to get a smidgen of sympathy from the girls at that lunch after Nene went all nuts on her with barely any provocation at all, she became public enemy number 1.  Notice that after her funky little attitude (I swear, my four year old is more mature than her) was largely ignored she dropped it and started acting right.  Sorry you couldn't ruin Eva's party just because Tanya was the one throwing it, you damn CHILD.

[lezlers]

On ‎2‎/‎11‎/‎2019 at 12:12 AM, hoosiermom said:

All I could think about was what happened to all that beautiful food that no one appeared to eat much of? I would have chomped the shit out of it!

My favorite part was when Kandi just dug into that food without hesitation before anyone else even got there.  You can always count on Kandi to EAT!  😄

[Mr. Miner]

I heard a story on Reality Checked on XM radio last week. When Nene was living in LA she was talking with LVP about a property in West Hollywood that was for sale. Nene was interested in buying it to start a bar/restaurant. LVP convinced her it wasn't a good deal or idea. LVP later bought the property where PUMP is located today.   

[funnygirl]

39 minutes ago, Mr. Minor said:

I heard a story on Reality Checked on XM radio last week. When Nene was living in LA she was talking with LVP about a property in West Hollywood that was for sale. Nene was interested in buying it to start a bar/restaurant. LVP convinced her it wasn't a good deal or idea. LVP later bought the property where PUMP is located today.   

Nene can be salty at LVP all she wants, but LVP saved her from a failed business venture. What does Nene know about running a bar/restaurant? LVP had two prior to Pump (and they're still going strong). Not to mention, the location is close to the famed LGBTQ bar The Abbey. Nene would've never stood a chance, while LVP at least has the business clientele and reputation in Hollywood to survive in the competitive market. 

[smores]

5 hours ago, Rlb8031 said:

See, I'm not gonna shame her for this. We only see a very small portion of their lives that they are willing to share.

She would only be seen doing this if Greg was comfortable having that much of his illness shared on tv. He isn't required to put his health struggles out there for entertainment so that Nene has a storyline, but his failure to do so doesn't necessarily mean that she wasn't engaged in helping him in this way either. It just means that it may not have been part of their tv lives. 

I know how hard caring for loved ones is, so I'm giving everyone here the benefit of the doubt and assuming the best possible scenario.

Also, who wants to see Greg having a colostomy bag changed on the show?  I sure as hell don't.  And that's really a big part of the problem that Nene faces.  When you're a caregiver, a lot of people are all "OMG! This is so hard, I'm so sorry! Tell me if there's anything I can do!" and they send flowers and sort of mean their words.  They're happy to come sit at the hospital for an hour, bring some food by, but, often that goes away after a bit.  No one wants to literally handle the bag of shit, and of course, the patient likely doesn't want them to.  No one is lining up to sit with them at 3 am, if they're feeling sick, or to do yet another load of laundry that got messed up from some sort of fluid that no one wants to think about.  But, Nene is the one who gets to do all of that.  And she has to do it in a way that more or less makes Greg think she's totally happy to do it and it's not any more unusual than the load of towels she was already going to wash that week anyway.  And how do you call to complain about this stuff?  People will think you're selfish, it's not the type of thing most people really have a background in.  They don't get the stuff that the patients can say, how absolutely nasty they can be without meaning it.  And on top of all of that, Nene has to come to grips with the fact that Greg is essentially refusing to do the treatment that the drs say will save him, because he somehow believes that he is going to be cured by vegetables.