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LuAnn de Lesseps: No Longer a Countess, Still Never a Princess


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I would imagine that LuAnn would be playing Matron Mama Morton.--her song can really be talk-sung by almost anyone......i.e. Wendy Williams did it...so I think LuAnn with her height and deep voice could probably pull it off--doesn't require that much movement/dancing or real singing.  

Next up.......Dancing with the Stars!!!!

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On 7/13/2019 at 6:58 PM, izabella said:

They have to do something to put on tv.  It's their job and this season, cabaret was it since most of the women had no storylines at all.  This season was short for a reason.  What did Sonja and Ramona bring to the season?  Dorinda brought little except for her anger toward Lu from last season, plus she invites people to her Berkshires house so she had the fish room drama to carp about all season. 

The season was short, what, 3 episodes? What else was the season short of? An international trip? How long do those trips last? Three episodes. Why wouldn't they go on an international trip this year? Ms. Ankle monitor, perhaps? She claimed it was a concession to get permission to travel in the country. Im thinking international travel was a huge no. So, what did the Countess bring to the show this year? Entitled twuntness and very likely the removal of my travel porn. 

Oh, and some tired ass caberet. 

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(edited)
41 minutes ago, tabloidlover said:

So Luann lied about being cast in Chicago on Broadway

https://pagesix.com/2019/07/26/luann-de-lesseps-isnt-actually-joining-chicago/

Wonder if she honked somebody off by blabbing about it, thereby eliminating herself from consideration.  Just deserts.

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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1 hour ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Is it just me, or does Victoria always look like she needs a good scrubbing? 

I get that not smiling is a fashion thing, and we absolutely shouldn't have to smile, but both Victoria and her cousin have stank face. Also, do we think the cousin wore a sheer shirt as a fashion statement. Because, boobie! ( childish, I know but that makes me cringe.)

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Just now, ShawnaLanne said:

I get that not smiling is a fashion thing, and we absolutely shouldn't have to smile, but both Victoria and her cousin have stank face. Also, do we think the cousin wore a sheer shirt as a fashion statement. Because, boobie! ( childish, I know but that makes me cringe.)

I kind of love the skirt, though.

I'm five foot two, so it'd look like a Hefty bag on me, but still.

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(edited)
34 minutes ago, ShawnaLanne said:

I would do the same. If I'm the subject of the image, I would feel I'd have a right to it.

I hear you. But Unfortunately, that’s not the case. Photo agencies can, and do, sue for copyright infringement. (At minimum, they’ll send you a cyst and deceased letter and still demand a fee in the hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars—generally more than you would have paid if you had licensed the photo in the first place.) Here are BFA’s terms; fees for using the photos were in the hundreds of dollars (exact fee dependent on use).

And usually at events like that, you sign a waiver saying they can use your image as they please. 

Luann didn’t even bother to crop out the watermark 🙄

(I don’t think she’s alone in doing this, though; I feel like I saw a Getty Images watermark on some other Bravolebrity’s Insta site recently.)

Edited by ivygirl
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4 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

Me too!!! Yikes. I mean, Lu’s kids are attractive, but it kinda shocks me how much they look like The Count; dude has some seriously strong genes!!

I think they were Peak-Too-Soon like Sonja and alcohol.  I thought they were cute kids but it didn't translate into a good looking adult.  

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1 hour ago, bosawks said:

Chicago is all about the flim-flam and liars and cheats.

Maybe she was just auditioning......

Luann is very method. Roxie Hart pretends to be pregnant to avoid the gallows. Luann spends season 5 pretending she was trying to have a baby with her man after half the cast was axed, even though Lu's tubes were tied. Roxie claims she was led astray by music, men, and booze. Luann's music is a crime, she's had two cheating husbands and a pirate as a lover, and booze...duh. Roxie uses the scandal to restart her career. Can anybody say Countess and Friends Cabaret? Method!

Daniel Day Lewis and Marlon Brando ain't got nothing on Lu.

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20 hours ago, divsc said:

It sounds like the role required too much work for Lu before she gets in front of an audience.  I do get that she could not cancel her cabaret performances already scheduled,  but I would think that she would want to try to work out an arrangement.   Nene was able to do her role in Cinderella while she was filming RHOA.  

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10 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

You should tweet this to Ben Rimalower and Billy Stritch. Dietrich could not sing and this song is so up Lulu's alley.

I dunno, HH.  If they need some anonymous dork (me) to tell them about this song, they're definitely in the wrong business.  And if the countess has so little curiosity about her own art, well . . .

I hope they never put the song in her act.  Dietrich was such a hero (literally, against the Nazis) that I can think of a million better ways to "honor" her.

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@Mondrianyone you're probably right. Billy and Ben are knowledgeable professionals; they are probably familiar with the song. It's just me the civilian who had to be reminded that Marlene Dietrich was no great shakes as a singer and a lot of the songs she was famous for would work really well for Luann. It reminded me of this episode of Batman: The Animated Series where Harley Quinn is singing a song that could really describe her relationship with the Joker. The relationship is abusive, manipulative, and codependent.

The song is actually from the musical flop, Meet the People.

It reminded me that are whole bunch of songs that are largely unknown to modern audiences and might actually work well with Luann's vocal limitations.

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2 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

It reminded me that are whole bunch of songs that are largely unknown to modern audiences and might actually work well with Luann's vocal limitations.

For sure.  So many wonderful old songs, and stars who weren't really singers, like Mae West and Sophie Tucker, Rusty Warren, Mabel Mercer.  The difference is, they brought a healthy dose of irony and a sense of humor about themselves to their work.  And a great deal of intelligence underpinning their performances.  I don't think the countess has that in her.

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It's absolutely Luann's mugshot in the center. I think face on the left with the chain of the statement necklace poking through the eye is a riff on the Countess and Friends poster.

Victoria and Noel are very talented, but damn does the sketch suggest that there are still some lingering issues.

Edited by HunterHunted
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4 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

It's absolutely Luann's mugshot in the center. I think face on the left with the chain of the statement necklace poking through the eye is a riff on the Countess and Friends poster.

Victoria and Noel are very talented, but damn does the sketch suggest that there are still some lingering issues.

Quite understandably!

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4 minutes ago, QuinnM said:

People get ready.  She is off probation this week. Are we going to have a board pool for the date of the next arrest?  I mean she’s not really an alcoholic so there is no reason she can’t drink.  And drink.  And drink.

Hmmm....I give her until October. Sometime around Halloween because she’ll be all dressed up in costume and forget who she really is. Like Reece Witherspoon when she got arrested: “Do you know who I am?” 

P.S. Now that she’s almost off probation she’ll be headed to the Drs office first for her prescription for medical marijuana 

Edited by Mindthinkr
Added a P.S.
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25 minutes ago, QuinnM said:

People get ready.  She is off probation this week. Are we going to have a board pool for the date of the next arrest?  I mean she’s not really an alcoholic so there is no reason she can’t drink.  And drink.  And drink.

Let's not get too excited. That's still enough time to for her to violate by staggering home hammered and dropkicking a school crossing guard.

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I don't think Luann thinks she is an alcoholic - I also think she has some manic issue.

If Luann is smart she'll keep the drinking in private settings. Not out in the public. She really shouldn't drink while filming the new season.

The only protection she has from getting into trouble again - are the handlers of the Cabaret show. They will provide some covering up as long as they are making money off of her. If she becomes too much of a liability they will drop her like it's hot.

Edited by KungFuBunny
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2 hours ago, QuinnM said:

People get ready.  She is off probation this week. Are we going to have a board pool for the date of the next arrest?  I mean she’s not really an alcoholic so there is no reason she can’t drink.  And drink.  And drink.

She'll be hunkered down all alone in her round bunker  with multiple cases of beer, wine and various hard liquors hidden under her bed. Also several cartons of ciggies.

Mimosa's for breakfast, bloody marys for brunch, gin and tonic with lunch, nap in the afternoon, a beer after the nap, a couple of fun cocktails before dinner, wine with dinner and then martinis in the evening.

I think her next arrest will be a DUI.

Edited by Happy Camper
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7 minutes ago, Happy Camper said:

She'll be hunkered down all alone in her round bunker bingeing with multiple cases of beer, wine and various hard liquors. Also several cartons of ciggies.

Mimosa's for breakfast, bloody marys for brunch, gin and tonic with lunch, nap in the afternoon, a beer after the nap, a couple of fun cocktails before dinner, wine with dinner and then martinis in the evening.

I think her next arrest will be a DUI.

I also don’t think that the legal system will be so lenient with any subsequent arrests.   

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5 hours ago, QuinnM said:

People get ready.  She is off probation this week. Are we going to have a board pool for the date of the next arrest?  I mean she’s not really an alcoholic so there is no reason she can’t drink.  And drink.  And drink.

Okay, we really need a board pool on this. The winner getting bragging rights.

After two arrests I think she will keep her consuming less public for a while but as my Google search on Countess and Friends shows, her last cabaret date on the calendar is something like November 9, so my net for the pool is November 10 

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