Season 6 Discussion

[millennium]

6 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

 If Kalani wanted an smart, educated, in the know person, she wouldn't have married an Island boy who is very naive about the world.

If Kalani wanted a smart, educated person, she wouldn't have married someone with such obvious cognitive and emotional challenges.  The head-slapping, stalking around and barking should have tipped her off.   That can't be the first time she has seen it.

[Kath94]

10 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

I wasn't suggesting that it's cool to not support your child. It is disgusting if he was lax and didn't bother. But to me, it doesn't match his character on the show. I want to know if Kalani asked him to send money and diapers and whatever and he said, "No. Why should I? You live in a rich country and don't need anything from me" or did Kalani cease contact with him and never reach out to him for help. It was not made clear whether she asked for help and he refused. He's childlike to such a high degree. He doesn't know a lot of things that people think he's supposed to know. If he really did feel like Oliver would be well taken care of here because everyone in America is rich and he needed to continue to support his parents, I don't see it as coming from a cold hearted, cruel dirtbag. I seriously would have seen it as a teaching moment and let him know that he is definitely misinformed and it doesn't matter if Kalani is wealthy, he should be contributing. I don't see him fighting back against that. I just think he has led such a simple life that he just doesn't know. The answer to that is not to skewer him, but teach him. If Kalani wanted an smart, educated, in the know person, she wouldn't have married an Island boy who is very naive about the world. She can't expect him to know things that he is not aware of and it's not really fair to trash him for being unaware. She can trash him if she explains things and he ignores them, of course. 

I agree.  I just don't think the thought crossed Asuelu's mind to send any kind of assistance.  It wasn't malicious or intentional.  It just never occurred to him.

[millennium]

44 minutes ago, Mothra said:

Do they really think women secretly like that?  Wha?

Why not?  They think women secretly like everything else they do.

[configdotsys]

2 minutes ago, millennium said:

If Kalani wanted a smart, educated person, she wouldn't have married someone with such obvious cognitive and emotional challenges.  The head-slapping, stalking around and barking should have tipped her off.   That can't be the first time she has seen it.

Totally. I was looking at her during that time and she wasn't alarmed or shocked. If my husband acted that way and I had never seen it before, I would have been aghast and probably fallen over in shock. She didn't have much of a reaction so I thought this wasn't the first time she saw him flip.

[magemaud]

11 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

12 hours ago, magemaud said:

There's a picture out there (on the Eric/Leida thread) of Eric with Ashley at some 90 Day event. He's wearing a t-shirt that says something like "It Must Be Proper" and miraculously, his forehead crease is gone! That led to some conjecture that Leida is indeed messing around with Botox injections. 

Big difference.

Thanks for posting this (I was too lazy to look it up myself.) The more I look at the before and after, the more I think it's Photoshopped. Even his eyebags look smaller. 

[sasha206]

Am I the only one here that wants a Big Brother version featuring 90DayF cast?

[Granny58]

1 hour ago, bravofan27 said:

Erik's ex-wife did an interview and said Erik drinks too much and is a womanizer

I am stunned that he is a womanizer.  How is that even possible????

[RealReality10]

37 minutes ago, shockermolar said:

There's an entire sub-genre of erotic fiction about it. For real.

After watching the second season of Goliath and a few choice episodes of CSI I will never be shocked by the things people get off on.

Just now, Granny58 said:

I am stunned that he is a womanizer.  How is that even possible????

RIGHT????  Is he considered sexy in baraboo?  Is the population like 95% blind single women who don't have access to a computer?

[RealReality10]

28 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

Because she's naive and 20 and thinks he will change? She wants to come to America and this is her only way. I don't know. I think she is foolish for doing so but everyone does foolish things when young. Look how giddy she was when he gave her the ring. Look how happy he was. It's a euphoric moment. But put that up against how he treated her at many other times and even his attitude on the tell all: The host asked OLGA what time it was in Russia and Steven jumps in and answers the question. That is telling. I feel bad for Olga. She will be in a strange place, unable to work and completely dependent on Steven for everything. She'll have no say in a lot of things. Hopefully, she will find some type of support system, or he'll get this ass into some type of anger management and therapy and grow the eff up.

So, let's say Olga were here (I guess she is now) and they get married (or don't) since Richie is her child and an American citizen does that make it easier to stay if Steven isn't in the picture?

If there is any impression I've gotten of Olga it is that she has it together, much more so than Steven. 

She has an apartment, she was going to school, she funded her summer vacation with a job showing some degree of responsibility and planning.  She has survived on her own with what appears to be relatively little help from family and friends.  She survived a Russian orphanage.  She seems composed and patient, she went through a C-section and put up with Steven being an ass with relatively little complaint.

I could see her getting her act together, going to school, getting a career and supporting Richie. 

Given Stevens attitude, I don't see the same opportunities for him.  The whole "I don't want to be told what to do" and "you have to thank me for doing stuff I'm supposed to do" generally doesn't go over well in the workplace.

[CoachWristletJen]

49 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

Maybe Ashley should try to buy a butt.

Too bad she can't buy some character!

The faces she was making when Larissa was talking made me think of a girl in middle school. She is really immature!

Also, it's painfully clear that Jay used her to get to the United States. He's very calculating. He waited until they were married to mess around because in his mind, he felt safe. So he started putting his Abe Lincoln beard on Tinder.

He's only sorry he got caught.

And, he probably resents Ashley more and more with each passing day because she can't stop bickering.

As for Ashley, she's just weak A.F.  She should have had the police remove him. He could go stay with relatives, just like Luis did.

[RealReality10]

^^ yeah what is it with that beard?  It literally only worked for Abe Lincoln.

Why is she still paying his phone bill if he is using it to meet women on tinder? 

Edited January 8, 2019 by RealReality10

[Gobi]

1 hour ago, shockermolar said:

There's an entire sub-genre of erotic fiction about it. For real.

And now, in the category of "Things I Didn't Need to Know" ...

[CoachWristletJen]

49 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

I wasn't suggesting that it's cool to not support your child. It is disgusting if he was lax and didn't bother. But to me, it doesn't match his character on the show. I want to know if Kalani asked him to send money and diapers and whatever and he said, "No. Why should I? You live in a rich country and don't need anything from me" or did Kalani cease contact with him and never reach out to him for help. It was not made clear whether she asked for help and he refused. He's childlike to such a high degree. He doesn't know a lot of things that people think he's supposed to know. If he really did feel like Oliver would be well taken care of here because everyone in America is rich and he needed to continue to support his parents, I don't see it as coming from a cold hearted, cruel dirtbag. I seriously would have seen it as a teaching moment and let him know that he is definitely misinformed and it doesn't matter if Kalani is wealthy, he should be contributing. I don't see him fighting back against that. I just think he has led such a simple life that he just doesn't know. The answer to that is not to skewer him, but teach him. If Kalani wanted an smart, educated, in the know person, she wouldn't have married an Island boy who is very naive about the world. She can't expect him to know things that he is not aware of and it's not really fair to trash him for being unaware. She can trash him if she explains things and he ignores them, of course. 

I agree that Asuelu just assumed that Kalani was rich and had walls and so his son would be well taken care of until he arrives. I don't think that he's a deadbeat because he said that he takes care of his parents. I think he will work a job in a warehouse someplace doing something he loathes in order to support his family. Between the miserable job and Kalani's constant berating him, he will be very beaten down. His mother's constant encouragement has been replaced by Kalani's constant disappointment.

I think he has some undiagnosed issues. He's been taught English, but it is a constant struggle for him to speak in a foreign language. And, when more than one person is speaking at once, he can't deal.  Based upon what we saw, there's no way that I would want to leave him alone with a baby who can scream and fuss and make noise. Now he'll be in a situation with two kids screaming and fussing and making noise. I've raised two children who were close in age and I know you have to stay calm. Little people just don't always do what you want them to do, and you can't start yelling and hitting yourself when you think things are going awry. The fact is, a little chaos is normal!

The behavior we are seeing is not a Samoa thing. It's an Asuelu thing. The guy has some issues! Kalani was desperate, and she picked him based upon his appearance. She doesn't have a tight trim body like Larissa or Fernanda, and, there's not a thing wrong with that! However, like most of the Americans on the show, she's shallow and she wanted a man who had a tight trim body himself. But he looks at the size of a country on a map and determines that his son doesn't need anything from him. Even taking his culture into consideration, that's not adult behavior.

17 minutes ago, RealReality10 said:

^^ yeah what is it with that beard?  It literally only worked for Abe Lincoln.

Why is she still paying his phone bill if he is using it to meet women on tinder? 

Because she's stupid.

She traded her dignity for the D.

And she'd do it again.

[Gem 10]

On 1/6/2019 at 10:44 PM, Rabithed said:

Yes, his parents most likely miss him and worry about him as much as he does them. :( 

Kalani is very...childlike and seems shocked at everything going on around her. I think her parents (mom)? will be caring for the lot of them. 

You are 100 per cent right about that.  Hit the nail on the head.  They both need to be taken care of.  I couldn’t put my finger on it, but now I see why Kilani sister is so attached and worries about her.  Their parents also.

[Gobi]

33 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

I am stunned that he is a womanizer.  How is that even possible????

Just aim low.

[CoachWristletJen]

49 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

Totally. I was looking at her during that time and she wasn't alarmed or shocked. If my husband acted that way and I had never seen it before, I would have been aghast and probably fallen over in shock. She didn't have much of a reaction so I thought this wasn't the first time she saw him flip.

YES! Exactly! I'm happy to say that I've never seen Mr. Coach start barking.

[RealReality10]

2 minutes ago, Gobi said:

Just aim low.

.....must be what all the single women of baraboo say when they give Eric the time of day.

[Boofish]

38 minutes ago, RealReality10 said:

After watching the second season of Goliath and a few choice episodes of CSI I will never be shocked by the things people get off on.

RIGHT????  Is he considered sexy in baraboo?  Is the population like 95% blind single women who don't have access to a computer?

A. You me a new keyboard HAHAHAHAHAAH

6. Perhaps the place has been bird-boxed

[CoachWristletJen]

8 minutes ago, Gem 10 said:

You are 100 per cent right about that.  Hit the nail on the head.  They both need to be taken care of.  I couldn’t put my finger on it, but now I see why Kilani sister is so attached and worries about her.  Their parents also.

Kalani is not bright either. Her decisions are just awful. It's like every time she has a chance to do right she goes left.

I think about that road trip when she had a fit because Asuelu took Oliver out of the car seat. She put the baby in worse jeopardy by looking back and screaming and trying to drive with Cheeto fingers.

They're low on money. And, they're only an hour away from their destination. For heaven's sake, it's still DAYLIGHT! And, Kalani makes the decision that it's time to stop and spend money for a hotel room for the night. I mean, WTF? How much did that room cost? Why didn't you just drive for another 60 minutes and reach your destination?

Because she's Kalani, and her brain doesn't work good. And she can't live good and do other stuff good. #Zoolander 

[StatisticalOutlier]

1 hour ago, Elizzikra said:

Some breastfed babies won't take a bottle. Maybe Oliver is one of them.

The way those two are, I wouldn't be surprised if her sister could feed him without a bottle.

 

3 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

This is getting really ridiculous!  I am responding to this comment because it is the most recent but many people here have said that he was trying to leave the country with the baby.  Yes, he did say that he thought he should take the baby to America but he NEVER tried to take the baby without Olga knowing.  No matter what you think of his plan - what we SAW was a PARENT discussing custody of a child with the OTHER PARENT!   And again, no matter what anyone thinks about his qualifications to parent or what is the best situation for a newborn it is up to his parents to decide what THEY want to do.  Painting him as some sort of international child smuggler/kidnapper is really jumping to conclusions.

That's the thing for me.  He has given us so many reasons to hate him that jumping to conclusions is unnecessary, and in fact can make one's point weaker.  But I like facts.  Or as close as we can get to them on shows like this.

[Natalie68]

On 1/6/2019 at 9:46 PM, Toaster Strudel said:

I'm ready to declare a winner :

His boobs are bigger than I thought.  He totally gives me the creeps and it has nothing to do with his moobs.

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, eatsleep said:

OMG yes! I was so puzzled by her grungy little knitted hat and his stupid thrift store jacket thing.

I kept wanting to fix Colt's collar

[magemaud]

4 hours ago, Granny58 said:

5 hours ago, bravofan27 said:

Erik's ex-wife did an interview and said Erik drinks too much and is a womanizer

I am stunned that he is a womanizer.  How is that even possible????

He strikes me as the "dirty old man" type who tries to pick up women in bars, but I doubt if he's very successful at it. 

edited to add: I think if you asked Larissa, she'd also claim Coltee is a womanizer since she was jealous that he "true complimented" the waitress's glasses. 

Edited January 8, 2019 by magemaud

[Mr. Miner]

I'm always amazed at the desperation of these people to come to America. They will actually marry people like Colt, David Poor, Danielle, Nicole and Pole to name a few.

Apparently Coltee likes to jackee offee on camera.

[millennium]

49 minutes ago, CoachWristletJen said:

 

Also, it's painfully clear that Jay used her to get to the United States. He's very calculating. He waited until they were married to mess around because in his mind, he felt safe. So he started putting his Abe Lincoln beard on Tinder.

He's only sorry he got caught.

And, he probably resents Ashley more and more with each passing day because she can't stop bickering.

As for Ashley, she's just weak A.F.  She should have had the police remove him. He could go stay with relatives, just like Luis did.

I have no impulse anymore to think about what Ashley or other members of this show should do.    Reading the social media-related material shared in this thread has left me feeling deflated and used, like NONE of what we're shown is real, it's all lies perpetuated by the writers and a cast of characters not clever or attractive enough to be youtube sensations so they went this route instead.  Even the tell-all isn't a tell-all, obviously, because this thread alone is ten times the tell-all Sunday night's episode was.  Colt masturbating on the internet, Larissa abandoning her children,  Jonathan bankrupt, Fernanda in the wind, Steven grifting on GoFundMe, Jay on the loose to impregnate or spread STDs ...

Forgive me, but hard-working people are being snatched by immigration officials and deported when they leave their apartments to buy a gallon of milk nowadays, but these 90-day con artists can move about freely and become social media sensations?   Something is seriously fucked up.

[sasha206]

1 minute ago, magemaud said:

He strikes me as the "dirty old man" type who tries to pick up women in bars, but I doubt if he's very successful at it. 

I was about to say the same thing -- being considered a "womanizer" doesn't mean that he's good or successful at it!

[b2H]

17 hours ago, RealReality10 said:

This was kalani/kolanis point, which I totally agreed with.  Even if someone else has the money you can send something just to show that you're trying to care for your child.

So much of that discussion had its foundations in cultural differences.  The guy comes from an island in the Pacific.  What does he know about normal cultural behavior outside of Samoa?  Why would anyone expect him to have that knowledge?  Did anyone explain this to him at any point, or did they just assume he was a deadbeat so they could hold it over his head forever, like they're doing?  
I'm sorry, but the guy is not from around these parts.  He was also supporting his parents, so I'm not sure he even had anything to send.  I don't like the Horror sisters because they're really evil at heart, both of them.

[blubld43]

On 12/30/2018 at 10:42 PM, Dance4Life said:

Yea.  When you go to jail it can take at least 24 hours.  A few hours to book you.  Transfer you to jail. Then you have to wait until the next business day to go in front of the judge.  You are read your charges, you make our plead and judge sets the bail.

Then when it is in the system you can get bail out.  They can pay cash but if the person has to go to the bail bond.....then that can add a few more hours.

 

Where I am at the judge works every day.  But, people have to remember you are getting charge with 50-100 people at a time.....especially if it is over the weekend and it is busy.  It is mostly fights, drugs, traffic or warrant violations. 

 

She is in Vegas....can you imagine how many people get arrested???  This is probably why it took 2 days!

The judges here do business 7 days a week as well.   Yeah that stuff all takes time but not 48 hours.   Colt let her sit there for some of that time,  guaranteed. 

Most people have someone making arrangements with a bail company while being booked,  when you're done with that, the bond is ready.  And the booking process is all done at the jail, no transfers involved. 

Larissa deserves an expedited green card, the idea of sleeping with Colt is SO repulsive!

[JennyMominFL]

3 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

Well, while we know this rarely happens on this show, there is a SLIGHT chance of producer manipulation here also : ).  They could have decided that it was a good idea for Richie to have the US passport for many reasons and we never got to see the discussion.  Also, isn't it possible that even if Olga didn't get the K1 she could get a visitor visa and bring Richie in the future and they thought this might make it easier?  I don't think it is out of the question that Olga could get a normal, visit the US visa.

I think getting Richie’s passport as soon as he could was actually smart. I have no issue with that. Trying to take him outnof the country without Olga would have been a problem though.

Edited January 8, 2019 by JennyMominFL

[RealReality10]

19 minutes ago, b2H said:

So much of that discussion had its foundations in cultural differences.  The guy comes from an island in the Pacific.  What does he know about normal cultural behavior outside of Samoa?  Why would anyone expect him to have that knowledge?  Did anyone explain this to him at any point, or did they just assume he was a deadbeat so they could hold it over his head forever, like they're doing?  
I'm sorry, but the guy is not from around these parts.  He was also supporting his parents, so I'm not sure he even had anything to send.  I don't like the Horror sisters because they're really evil at heart, both of them.

I don't know, I don't think anyone should have to tell you that you should support your child.  And I don't think there was anything particularly cultural about "I thought you were rich so I no longer had any responsibility to care for my child."

And I think he still thinks this is the case, which is why he was so excited to have another child that he cannot afford.  He doesn't seem to think that financially supporting a child is his responsibility.  And he understand a responsibility to support family if he supports his parents 

[Natalie68]

On 1/7/2019 at 7:37 AM, bichonblitz said:

Steven makes no apologies for anything and still comes off as very controlling. . That's a bad sign. He can still take the baby away from Olga once she's here. I hope she is very, very careful. 

I was rooting for her to stay in Russia.  I think he is nothing but trouble and will continue to verbally/mentally abuse her.  I do not see him changing or growing out of it.  While I am here and commenting...

This season felt really dirty to me.  I didn't like any of the couples really. 

Jay/Ashley:  He is 20 and a playboy.  To expect him to act differently when he had nothing to keep him busy was foolish.  I fast forwarded through a lot of their story.  Hopefully she has learned her friend had her best interest in mind and maybe she will believe her next time.

Leida/Erik:  Man, when her sister was around she was pretty honest about Leida's crazy.  He is the hardest looking 40 I have seen and I have seen some shit.  He is icky and she is no prize but, even Leida didn't deserve to come to the US for THAT lifestyle.  He is not in a position to buy a wife financially or otherwise.  What a sad existence.  

Fernanda/Jon:  I felt she was cute and he was a douchebag.  I did NOT know she was a literal child when he met her.  That grosses me out and I am glad they are not together.  Why couldn't he find someone who was of legal age here?  Because he is a douchebag.  

Larissa/Colten:  Ew.  Just overall ew.  I don't think she is as pretty as she thinks she is, he is SUPER gross (not necessarily just in looks, but I wouldn't be surprised if he had a trunk of trophies from past women), and unless he MUST live with his mother as a caregiver, I would run far away from any man who at his age lives with his mother.  The only thing about him that I could possibly like about him is his cats.  But I do not want to think about what he does to them when the cameras aren't around.  That said, I also felt badly for Larissa that she hooked her wagon to this mofo and come here for THAT life.  Just no.  

Kalani/Asuelu:  He is a sweet and naive boy who may be on the spectrum as suggested above.  He doesn't seem to process things well.  Her family needs to be a bit warmer to him.  I think they would be better off living in Samoa and Kalani might want to check into some bc. 

[sasha206]

I'm confused about Ashley -- she certainly made it sound like she didn't want to be on the hook to pay for Jay for the next 10 years, but didn't she also say she wasn't going to change his status?

I think she tried to act like she's some badass that would never put up with a cheating man...and yet, I bet she gives him many many more chances only to be disappointed EVERY TIME.

[eatsleep]

2 hours ago, configdotsys said:

I wasn't suggesting that it's cool to not support your child. It is disgusting if he was lax and didn't bother. But to me, it doesn't match his character on the show. I want to know if Kalani asked him to send money and diapers and whatever and he said, "No. Why should I? You live in a rich country and don't need anything from me" or did Kalani cease contact with him and never reach out to him for help. It was not made clear whether she asked for help and he refused. He's childlike to such a high degree. He doesn't know a lot of things that people think he's supposed to know. If he really did feel like Oliver would be well taken care of here because everyone in America is rich and he needed to continue to support his parents, I don't see it as coming from a cold hearted, cruel dirtbag. I seriously would have seen it as a teaching moment and let him know that he is definitely misinformed and it doesn't matter if Kalani is wealthy, he should be contributing. I don't see him fighting back against that. I just think he has led such a simple life that he just doesn't know. The answer to that is not to skewer him, but teach him. If Kalani wanted an smart, educated, in the know person, she wouldn't have married an Island boy who is very naive about the world. She can't expect him to know things that he is not aware of and it's not really fair to trash him for being unaware. She can trash him if she explains things and he ignores them, of course. 

Kalani and Kolini said their disappointment wasn't just about his not sending money. They he was not involved at all. 

I never said he was cruel, just that I found his lack of involvement gross. In every culture, on every continent on earth, men know they are expected to protect and provide for their children. If he knows to kick in and support his parents, then he knows he needs to kick in and support his child. He knows how to finesse the panties off of foreign tourists but he can't ask if his infant child is OK? Bullshit.

 

1 hour ago, CoachWristletJen said:

Also, it's painfully clear that Jay used her to get to the United States. He's very calculating. He waited until they were married to mess around because in his mind, he felt safe.

I don't see how he felt safe or had calculated this when he knows (and told the guys in the barber shop) it's not a done deal for two more years. 

 

29 minutes ago, b2H said:

So much of that discussion had its foundations in cultural differences.  The guy comes from an island in the Pacific.  What does he know about normal cultural behavior outside of Samoa?  Why would anyone expect him to have that knowledge?  Did anyone explain this to him at any point, or did they just assume he was a deadbeat so they could hold it over his head forever, like they're doing?  
I'm sorry, but the guy is not from around these parts.  He was also supporting his parents, so I'm not sure he even had anything to send.  I don't like the Horror sisters because they're really evil at heart, both of them.

He's from another country. Not another planet. He knows English. He watched American tv. He socialized w/ tourists from all over the world. Ppl who live in the South Pacific raise children like everyone else. They understand ppl need to eat and go to the doctor and wear clothing, etc. He admits he was working so he could give his parents money so they could live. He understands the concept. 

Edited January 8, 2019 by eatsleep

[Drogo]

10 minutes ago, b2H said:

So much of that discussion had its foundations in cultural differences.  The guy comes from an island in the Pacific.  What does he know about normal cultural behavior outside of Samoa?  Why would anyone expect him to have that knowledge? 

Samoan society is predominantly patriarchal, so his cultural norms dictate (probably more than ours do)  that a father should be the income provider for a family while a mother cares for the child and keeps the home.  I think Asuelu could've cleared all this up by saying "Hey, don't you need anything for the baby?" but he didn't, because he's a shitbag deadbeat who thinks money and diapers grow on trees in Oliver's mother's big country and Kalani didn't ask because she probably knows Asuelu has two settings:  Uncontrollable Tears and Finger Guns.  In short, he's exactly the kind of guy Low didn't want for his daughters. 

Shit, even Terrible Little Steven arrived in Russia and immediately started spending most of his limited funds to get Olga set up with everything Richie would need. 

Asuelu couldn't understand why Steven wanted to hear 'thank you' because Asuelu never did anything for Kalani besides knock her up, so he's never expected to hear thank you from her. 

[eatsleep]

11 minutes ago, RealReality10 said:

I don't know, I don't think anyone should have to tell you that you should support your child.  And I don't think there was anything particularly cultural about "I thought you were rich so I no longer had any responsibility to care for my child."

And I think he still thinks this is the case, which is why he was so excited to have another child that he cannot afford.  He doesn't seem to think that financially supporting a child is his responsibility.  And he understand a responsibility to support family if he supports his parents 

Yes! Thank you. It's actually offensive to read ppl imply Samoans lack basic morality and common sense (not wanting to support their own child).

Edited January 8, 2019 by eatsleep

[RealReality10]

8 minutes ago, JennyMominFL said:

I think getting Richie’s passport as soon as he could was actually smart. I have no issue with that. Trying to take him outnof the country without Olga would have been a problem though.

It probably is smart to get the passport or the paperwork done.  It just seems like the passport was obtained, in Steven's mind, as best I can tell, so that he could take Richie back to the United States with him.

Which is a fine plan if both parties have agreed to it.  But Steven was so busy pushing for richies paperwork and being shifty eyed with Olga about the status of her paperwork knowing full well that there is no way he could take Richie and Olga back with him.

He never specifically said he was going to take the baby, but up until he had gone into the embassy he had not been on the up and up with Olga, and he had been pushy about Richies paperwork.

The conversation about "well, it might take a long time to get YOUR paperwork Olga so maybe I should take the baby back with me" happened right after his embassy visit.  And no one in the embassy would have given him any more information on Olga's visa status since he hadn't applied for it.  He knew she couldn't leave with Richie.

Which makes me think that it's possible that the only information he DID get from the embassy was that there was no way he could just take Richie without Olga's consent.

It's certainly open for interpretation and it's not set in stone that that's what happened.  But right up until the embassy visit he had been very opaque, IMO.

[doyouevengohere]

Honestly I think Ashley wants to keep her options open for making up so they can be on Happily Ever After.....it' a paycheck and it comes with attention.

[RealReality10]

7 minutes ago, Drogo said:

Samoan society is predominantly patriarchal, so his cultural norms dictate (probably more than ours do)  that a father should be the income provider for a family while a mother cares for the child and keeps the home.  I think Asuelu could've cleared all this up by saying "Hey, don't you need anything for the baby?" but he didn't, because he's a shitbag deadbeat who thinks money and diapers grow on trees in Oliver's mother's big country and Kalani didn't ask because she probably knows Asuelu has two settings:  Uncontrollable Tears and Finger Guns.  In short, he's exactly the kind of guy Low didn't want for his daughters. 

Shit, even Terrible Little Steven arrived in Russia and immediately started spending most of his limited funds to get Olga set up with everything Richie would need. 

Asuelu couldn't understand why Steven wanted to hear 'thank you' because Asuelu never did anything for Kalani besides knock her up, so he's never expected to hear thank you from her. 

As much as I despise Steven, you are right.  Even he has kicked in whatever little money he made waiting tables.  I don't think it requires a thank you per se.  But I acknowledge that in that respect he was pretty stand up.

And 1000% agree that if you know a guy is going to start crying or putting his hands over his ears when he is even mildly confronted to do something you're not going to want to approach him at all.  

I had an ex boyfriend who would cry whenever we had an argument because I just couldn't deal and I would just drop my point immediately.

[sasha206]

9 minutes ago, eatsleep said:

He's from another country. Not another planet. He knows English. He watched American tv. He socialized w/ tourists from all over the world. Ppl who live in the South Pacific raise children like everyone else. They understand ppl need to eat and go to the doctor and wear clothing, etc. He admits he was working so he could give his parents money so they could live. He understands the concept. 

Yes, thank you!  I think far too often we give the 90 Day Fiances a break b/c they are from other countries and attribute everything to cultural differences.  I think there are also far too many "on the spectrum" armchair diagnoses.  Sometimes people are just sociopaths, socially uncomfortable, awkward, not intelligent.  

Asuelo's constant tears, and then his strange outsburst when there was arguing going on now makes me wonder if the Asuelo is violent and got fired b/c of an altercation with a female employee at the resort is actually true.

Early on, I felt embarrassed by him, for him, and sad for him.  After watching him for a while, I can see why the sister is freaked out by this union.  

[RealReality10]

^^ agree!  I said the same thing about Nikki.  Like, you obviously are willing to go through great pains and sacrifice to be in this beautiful country, so you'd probably really appreciate citizenship.

I mean how awful is Brazil that you'd sleep with Colt?  Yuck! It must be like a humanitarian crisis over there.

[blubld43]

On 1/2/2019 at 10:25 AM, Neurochick said:

I'm confused by this.  Is it because she's a woman that she should not have had to sit in jail?  Maybe she is violent and deserved to be in jail.  

Ashley's like, "I'm white and blonde, all the men want me!"  Now that Jay doesn't she's mad.  Ashley, you're not all that.  I've seen better women at the supermarket and without all the face paint.

Ashley is the typical woman who, having been popular in high school,  really thinks she's all that.  Now she's 30 and desperate,  I was baffled to see her and Jay snuggled up on the couch!

Kalani, ugh, imma need you to acknowledge that maybe YOU helped conceive your children,  this business of her acting like Asuelu did it all by himself makes me want to throw something .  She seems to think her entire family sits around focusing on her and her relationship all the time, meh.  She has such an air of the princess; honey we all know you just went crazy on that young stuff!

[politichick]

12 minutes ago, doyouevengohere said:

Honestly I think Ashley wants to keep her options open for making up so they can be on Happily Ever After.....it' a paycheck and it comes with attention.

Plus, she's totally getting off on being able to publicly chastise him and he will take it because he really wants to stay in the U.S. And then there's the angry fucking, too. 

[politichick]

3 hours ago, Boofish said:

Instagram and Fashion Nova. She will probably never be on the cover of Vogue but the Target Spring collection mailer is not out of the question. I actually think Fernanda is pretty but someone said she looked like a sock monkey and now I'm questioning all my life decisions.

I needed this laugh. Thank you. 

[Drogo]

9 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Sometimes people are just sociopaths, socially uncomfortable, awkward, not intelligent.  

Sometimes people are just assholes.  I agree it does a disservice to those with an actual diagnosis to lump people behaving badly in with them, based purely on bad behavior.

[Granny58]

1 hour ago, not you again said:

He appeared to have every intention of doing so, and as a PP said Olga's very obvious relief when he told her she could keep the baby (just typing that gets my hackles up) it seems this was not made-up drama in Olga's mind.

her relief really made an impression on me.  Either she is a marvelous actress and should head straight to Hollywood or she actually thought he was taking the baby.  

[sasha206]

21 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

her relief really made an impression on me.  Either she is a marvelous actress and should head straight to Hollywood or she actually thought he was taking the baby.  

Exactly.  It could very well have been producer manipulation, but it doesn't excuse it to me because she clearly thought this was a real possibility.

[TwirlyGirly]

5 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

<snip> Also, isn't it possible that even if Olga didn't get the K1 she could get a visitor visa and bring Richie in the future and they thought this might make it easier?  I don't think it is out of the question that Olga could get a normal, visit the US visa.

If Steven hasn't applied for the K-1 visa, then yes, Olga could apply for a Visitor visa.

However, if the K-1 visa application has been submitted and is in process, OR is submitted and subsequently denied, Olga would not get approved for a Visitors visa. Visitor visas are only granted to those the US has determined will leave when the visa expires; someone who has filed for a K-1 has made it known their intention is to immigrate. Therefore they are a risk to get married while in the U.S. on their Visitor visa, then apply for an Adjustment of Status (circumventing the K-1 process).

More on that here.

Edited to add: isn't that what Rachel and Jon (90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days) tried to do? I can't remember now whether Rachel ever filed for a K-1 visa for Jon or whether they held off because the chances of it getting approved were slim due to his criminal record. I can't remember the timeline of what they did. I know they got married in England, and didn't Jon also visit Rachel in the U.S. (which would have been on a Visitor visa)? But I don't recall the order in which these things took place.

5 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

<snip>  You can't just apply for a K-1 visa without the other person giving their information.  I base this on absolutely nothing but unless she filled out paperwork and Steven simply didn't file it she was probably aware that nothing had been done.

I downloaded the K-1 visa application and instructions from the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services website. The foreign immigrant ("beneficiary") does not complete any part of the form nor do they sign it. All of the information for both the petitioner and the beneficiary is completed by the petitioner; only the petitioner signs the form.

While the information requested regarding the beneficiary is extensive (it's a single form covering both the petitioner and the beneficiary - but it's 13 pages long), there's nothing there that couldn't be communicated in a phone call or Skype/FaceTime session. 

It's entirely possible Steven obtained the necessary information from Olga, completed the form, and just didn't submit it.

Edited January 8, 2019 by TwirlyGirly
Added info/questions about Rachel and Jon

[gingerella]

1 hour ago, eatsleep said:

In every culture, on every continent on earth, men know they are expected to protect and provide for their children.

I'm sorry but this simply is not true. When I lived in Southern Africa region nearly all the households were female-headed and men went around impregnating women and being proud & loud about their abilty to get a woman pregnant but it was totally not expected that they would step up and actually be a parent, let alone give anything monetary to raise said child(ren), and most didn't. In fact, most kids I knew didn't know who their fathers were. Sure preachers preached 'family values' of a two parent home but those were/are 'Christian' values and didn't take into account the current social norms. Not saying I approved of that, but that's how it was. In other regions of Africa at that time, men were responsible fathers, just not in the region I was in. So no, it's not everywhere.

 

And in the Pacific Islands cultural practices vary greatly from island to island. I dont know what Samoan culture is like, but it seems from what I see locally where I live, and on this show, family is closely knit so either Asuelu is a slacker asshole, or he's mentally deficient in some manner and isn't terribly socially aware of what is expected of him. I suspect the latter because dude just doesn't seem right in the noggin'.

[Kangatush]

I'm going to defend Asuelu a little here.  Financially supporting children, is NOT universally a given.  What about Leida's ex not contributing for Alless?  It's normal for us here in the US, but even then look at how many parents need court orders to do "the right thing".  

If Kalani didn't ask, especially since they seemed to be very on again/off again, I'm not surprised that it didn't occur to him to offer.

[RealReality10]

5 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

I'm going to defend Asuelu a little here.  Financially supporting children, is NOT universally a given.  What about Leida's ex not contributing for Alless?  It's normal for us here in the US, but even then look at how many parents need court orders to do "the right thing".  

If Kalani didn't ask, especially since they seemed to be very on again/off again, I'm not surprised that it didn't occur to him to offer.

But I think that even deadbeat parents the United States know what the right thing is, they just choose not to do it.

As for cultural norms, I find it hard to believe that a culture would expect you to support your parents but not the children you brought into the world.

As for alless, someone hypothesized (and it's all conjecture) that leida's ex husband may have been a beard who married her because the father of her child wasn't fabulous enough or wasn't interested.  

There is no shortage of men anywhere in the world who will sleep with a woman and refuse to take any responsibility.

It's totally a theory, so I am in no way saying it's gospel truth, but it explains a lot.