S05.E04: Litchfield's Got Talent

[Cranberry]

Red and Blanca dig for dirt on Piscatella. Suzanne conducts a séance. The guards show off their talents for "Litchfield Idol" judges Leanne and Angie.

[Chairperson Meow]

The methheads get the gun from Daya,etc.  The guards are now hostages and are forced to perform a talent show.  One guard pulls a Magic Mike.  

[Armchair Critic]

We didn't find out what crime the Muslim woman did to end up in prison?

[Lady Calypso]

So, I had a feeling that either Maria or Gloria had the gun, so I was right on that. I'm not pleased that the gun ended up in the meth heads' hands, though. I really don't like either of them, so any scenes with them make me tune out. 

So, I like Alison so I was happy to get a backstory on her. I was surprised that she was in a relationship where her husband was also married to another woman. I guess we'll find out how she got into prison soon enough. 

Yeah, the Magic Mike scene went on a tad too long. I appreciated it for what it was, but there was no substance there. 

I had to laugh at Alex's attempt to denounce herself as a leader, only to have the rest parrot her last statement. 

I just realized that Healy's nowhere to be seen. I kind of remember what happened to him, but I'm surprised he hasn't shown up yet or been mentioned.

Man,  Blanca and Red are taking those supplements like they're candy. That can't be good for them. 

I'm starting to like Linda, even though she's going to get her ass kicked when her secret comes out.

At least Caputo was only locked away and not anything else. 

[Chairperson Meow]

I'll guess that Alison tried to kill the other wife or assaulted her.  It seemed like the direction they were going in, plus we've never heard her mention a husband not daughter.  

[ShortyMac]

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I'm over this riot. It's boring me. On to the next...

[DoubleUTeeEff]

Interesting how they paralleled the white nationalist's understanding with her boyfriend-that he could have a sexual relationship while she was in jail-with the Muslim woman's story about her husband marrying a second woman. In both cases, the relationships went outside the women's boundaries-going public on Bookface in the white nationalist's case and making decisions on mothering in Alison's case. I guess if you give 'em an inch, they'll take a mile. (There's a dirty joke in there somewhere.) I was totally judging Alison's situation more than the white nationalist's but then I thought at least Alison had someone to help her out. I guess what bothers me is the double standard. Why can't Alison have a second husband to help her out instead? You know that would never fly with the ultra religious. OTOH, it's plausible that someone would have an understanding that they could have a relationship during their prison stay.

Edited June 10, 2017 by DoubleUTeeEff
realized I can't tell difference between meth head and white nationalist

[Kel Varnsen]

I am starting to get curious how many bullets that gun has. Daya shot one into the ceiling, and one into the guard's leg. The meth girl has fired it at least two times now. I mean sure the inmates still outnumber the hostages by a wide margin, but the gun without bullets reduces their power quite a bit.

[wonderchica05]

I couldn't believe Alex and Piper let Linda deliver food to her boyfriend and then I realized they didn't know yet. Boy, we're getting a lot of penises this season, huh? Good 'ole Beer Can. Linda's fitting right in!

Speaking of...Magic Mike went on too long, but the bouncing sock had me cracking up.

I'm surprised we haven't seen much public reaction to the riot yet, but I'm guessing that's coming next episode with the helicopter photos. Was that Sophia's wife in the previous episode, outside with the guards from Max? Who else do we think will show up? Maybe Lorna's hubby, and surely Suzanne's parents.

Edited June 11, 2017 by wonderchica05

[Helena Dax]

I must confess I don't understand the logic behind Alison's "I'm a modern woman, please use empowering terms when you talk with my babygirl, and btw, we should totally find another wife so someone will help (us? me?) to raise our daughter and help with the housework". Don't get me wrong, if they want to have a polygamous marriage, I'm okay with that. We should be free to love and share our life with the person/people we want. But this wasn't about love. This was about having someone to help with the housework... because that's what wives are for? I don't see the empowerment anywhere. 

 Anyway Alison wouldn't be the first character (or person) who doesn't live up to her own standards. 

The contest of talents was hilarious, yet totally absurd. The guardians took it too seriously, given the circumstances. I don't know, sometimes we're supposed to think the riot is a terrible and dangerous situation and sometimes we're supposed to laugh at it. To me, it isn't working 100%.

[Negritude]

8 hours ago, Helena Dax said:

I must confess I don't understand the logic behind Alison's "I'm a modern woman, please use empowering terms when you talk with my babygirl, and btw, we should totally find another wife so someone will help (us? me?) to raise our daughter and help with the housework". Don't get me wrong, if they want to have a polygamous marriage, I'm okay with that. We should be free to love and share our life with the person/people we want. But this wasn't about love. This was about having someone to help with the housework... because that's what wives are for? I don't see the empowerment anywhere. 

 Anyway Alison wouldn't be the first character (or person) who doesn't live up to her own standards. 

The contest of talents was hilarious, yet totally absurd. The guardians took it too seriously, given the circumstances. I don't know, sometimes we're supposed to think the riot is a terrible and dangerous situation and sometimes we're supposed to laugh at it. To me, it isn't working 100%.

ITA, the empowerment then sister wife talk made no sense but I'm guessing that was some kind of display of cultural sensitivity while playing into the overall girl power feminist tone of the show and it wasn't handled well...which is par for the course for OITNB, but I still watch lol.

I was here for the Magic Mike shenanigans. I expected it to just be the typical corny white guy who can't dance stuff but he actually had moves. I would make it rain on him, or at least sprinkle.

Edited June 11, 2017 by Negritude

[Nordly Beaumont]

I was expecting Magic Mike to grab the gun away from Meth Head while she was distracted.

[DangerousMinds]

On June 9, 2017 at 8:54 PM, Lady Calypso said:

So, I had a feeling that either Maria or Gloria had the gun, so I was right on that. I'm not pleased that the gun ended up in the meth heads' hands, though. I really don't like either of them, so any scenes with them make me tune out. 

So, I like Alison so I was happy to get a backstory on her. I was surprised that she was in a relationship where her husband was also married to another woman. I guess we'll find out how she got into prison soon enough. 

Yeah, the Magic Mike scene went on a tad too long. I appreciated it for what it was, but there was no substance there. 

I had to laugh at Alex's attempt to denounce herself as a leader, only to have the rest parrot her last statement. 

I just realized that Healy's nowhere to be seen. I kind of remember what happened to him, but I'm surprised he hasn't shown up yet or been mentioned.

Man,  Blanca and Red are taking those supplements like they're candy. That can't be good for them. 

I'm starting to like Linda, even though she's going to get her ass kicked when her secret comes out.

At least Caputo was only locked away and not anything else. 

Definitely amphetamines, not supplements. Whose were they?

[Captain Asshat]

On 6/9/2017 at 7:54 PM, Lady Calypso said:

I had to laugh at Alex's attempt to denounce herself as a leader, only to have the rest parrot her last statement.

All I could think about in that scene was Fight Club. "His name is Robert Paulson."

[The Mighty Peanut]

On 6/10/2017 at 6:20 PM, ShortyMac said:

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I'm over this riot. It's boring me. On to the next...

You may be in the minority, but you're certainly not alone. I honestly hate this plot and am depressed over what this show has become. I don't buy that a group largely composed of small time criminals would turn into this weird hybrid of sadistic torture rapists, and dopey buddy comedy cliches.

Edited June 13, 2017 by The Mighty Peanut

[ExplainItAgain]

On 6/11/2017 at 6:20 AM, Helena Dax said:

The contest of talents was hilarious, yet totally absurd. The guardians took it too seriously, given the circumstances. I don't know, sometimes we're supposed to think the riot is a terrible and dangerous situation and sometimes we're supposed to laugh at it. To me, it isn't working 100%.

Ugh, totally agree. I don't understand. This might be my least favorite episode of the series so far.

ETA: I am so over the meth heads. Literally anyone else with the gun would be more intriguing.

Edited June 12, 2017 by ExplainItAgain

[questionfear]

On 6/10/2017 at 9:30 PM, Kel Varnsen said:

I am starting to get curious how many bullets that gun has. Daya shot one into the ceiling, and one into the guard's leg. The meth girl has fired it at least two times now. I mean sure the inmates still outnumber the hostages by a wide margin, but the gun without bullets reduces their power quite a bit.

I have been wondering the same thing, and I am hoping we get a Clue shout out where they all argue over how many bullets are left. 

[Dobian]

On ‎6‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 6:30 PM, Kel Varnsen said:

I am starting to get curious how many bullets that gun has. Daya shot one into the ceiling, and one into the guard's leg. The meth girl has fired it at least two times now. I mean sure the inmates still outnumber the hostages by a wide margin, but the gun without bullets reduces their power quite a bit.

In New York and California the mag limit is ten rounds.  Law enforcement is exempt.  I don't know if private prison security guards fall under law enforcement, so could be 16, otherwise 10.

[Thog]

I'm fascinated by what the inmates choose to do with a phone once they get their hands on one. Knowing it has limited battery life, so many of them seem to be looking for funny cat pictures and dancing penis memes rather than trying to get a message out (talking to loved ones, asking for help, etc). I've got to give it to Pennsatucky for coming up with the most creative use. This episode made me really sad once I realized that many of them just don't have anyone on the outside to call, either because bridges have been burned or they simply never had any allies to begin with. So a little escapism is the best they're going to get from what should be a powerful tool.

[Clanstarling]

On 6/9/2017 at 5:54 PM, Lady Calypso said:

Man,  Blanca and Red are taking those supplements like they're candy. That can't be good for them. 

On 6/11/2017 at 11:39 PM, DangerousMinds said:

Definitely amphetamines, not supplements. Whose were they?

I definitely think they're drugs - but some of the specifics (the thirst and feeling hot) sounded like what I've heard about ecstasy - but again, I don't really know anything about them. Maybe amphetamines do the same thing. They found them in one of the guards lockers, as I recall.

On 6/10/2017 at 3:31 PM, DoubleUTeeEff said:

Interesting how they paralleled the white nationalist's understanding with her boyfriend-that he could have a sexual relationship while she was in jail-with the Muslim woman's story about her husband marrying a second woman. In both cases, the relationships went outside the women's boundaries-going public on Bookface in the white nationalist's case and making decisions on mothering in Alison's case. I guess if you give 'em an inch, they'll take a mile. (There's a dirty joke in there somewhere.) I was totally judging Alison's situation more than the white nationalist's but then I thought at least Alison had someone to help her out. I guess what bothers me is the double standard. Why can't Alison have a second husband to help her out instead? You know that would never fly with the ultra religious. OTOH, it's plausible that someone would have an understanding that they could have a relationship during their prison stay.

My take away from it was, that if they could just have gotten past their differences, they were the only people who could understand what the other was going through. I thought it was a nice commentary on how we can be so polarized and not be able to recognize our commonalities. 

[iMonrey]

Quote

We didn't find out what crime the Muslim woman did to end up in prison?

That's true about most of them, actually, if you think about it. What's Big Boo in prison for? Or Pennsatucky? Or Angie? Or Cindy? Rarely do the flashbacks show them getting arrested. We make assumptions, like Pennsatucky and Angie likely being in prison on drug charges, but we rarely see the arrest in the flashbacks. I don't even think we know why Nikki is in prison, do we?

Quote

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I'm over this riot. It's boring me. On to the next...

Yeah, I mean it was an interesting idea but we've spent four episodes on a 24-hour period. I'm ready to move on now. 

Quote

 I don't know, sometimes we're supposed to think the riot is a terrible and dangerous situation and sometimes we're supposed to laugh at it. To me, it isn't working 100%.

Agreed - the tone is all over the place. And the talent show was just absurd - at this point they're really reaching to keep this story going.

Quote

In New York and California the mag limit is ten rounds.  Law enforcement is exempt.  I don't know if private prison security guards fall under law enforcement, so could be 16, otherwise 10.

We don't know how many bullets were in it when the guard brought it with him either. There's nothing to say it was fully loaded at the time. BTW - which guard was it that brought the gun? Was it the one who got shot and had a stroke? "Humps?"

[Clanstarling]

4 hours ago, iMonrey said:

That's true about most of them, actually, if you think about it. What's Big Boo in prison for? Or Pennsatucky? Or Angie? Or Cindy? Rarely do the flashbacks show them getting arrested. We make assumptions, like Pennsatucky and Angie likely being in prison on drug charges, but we rarely see the arrest in the flashbacks. I don't even think we know why Nikki is in prison, do we?

I believe Pennsatucky was in jail for something related to shooting someone at an abortion clinic. I don't remember the details, but it was covered pretty thoroughly early on. I'm pretty sure they've revealed the stories for a number of the ones who were the prime focus originally, but not for most of this huge cast.

[DietCokeJunkie]

5 hours ago, iMonrey said:

at's true about most of them, actually, if you think about it. What's Big Boo in prison for? Or Pennsatucky? Or Angie? Or Cindy? Rarely do the flashbacks show them getting arrested. We make assumptions, like Pennsatucky and Angie likely being in prison on drug charges, but we rarely see the arrest in the flashbacks. I don't even think we know why Nikki is in prison, do we?

Pennsatucky shot an abortion clinic worker. Cindy was stealing from the airline passengers who went through her security line. The police showed up at her house after she gave a stolen iPad to her "sister." Nikki stole a cab to get to her drug dealer. 

I don't think we've ever seen an Angie flashback. 

[piequinn35]

https://www.popsugar.com/entertainment/How-Orange-New-Black-Characters-Got-Prison-34949342

Here's a summary on the characters and their flashbacks and the assumptions that got them to Litchfield, no Angie flashback yet.

[Clanstarling]

Thanks @piequinn35, that was a great update! 

[piequinn35]

Np, it's not complete though, we have seen Chang's flashback, right?

[iMonrey]

We saw a Chang flashback but it didn't tell us how she wound up in prison. 

[piequinn35]

I am guessing illegal business or organized crime activity for Chang.

[Guest]

The Red/Blanca/drug stuff is annoying me.  It's gone on too long.  WTH are they going to do with dirt on Piscatella, anyway?  

This has all gone on too long.  I enjoyed it for three eps and by the middle of this one, I was done.  I mean, I'll keep watching but they better have something more to come.  

[FozzyBear]

Re: what we know about who's in prison for what. I'd say it's about a 3/3/3 with the backstory.

1/3: we know to about a 99.9% certainty why they're in prison.

1/3: we don't know the exact charge, but we know enough about their life to make a pretty educated guess.

1/3: we really don't know.  

[FozzyBear]

I know the one gaurd doing a strip show for the prisoners was supposed to be funny, but it just made me ill. Can you imagine if this were a riot in a mens prison and a female gaurd felt the need to do that to stay alive? I don't think it would be funny. Right now I don't understand what the point of this season is because it's just making me hate characters that I had felt commodore with before.  

[Clanstarling]

8 hours ago, FozzyBear said:

I know the one gaurd doing a strip show for the prisoners was supposed to be funny, but it just made me ill. Can you imagine if this were a riot in a mens prison and a female gaurd felt the need to do that to stay alive? I don't think it would be funny. Right now I don't understand what the point of this season is because it's just making me hate characters that I had felt commodore with before.  

It made me very uncomfortable too. 

[knaankos]

On 6/16/2017 at 9:29 PM, Winston9-DT3 said:

The Red/Blanca/drug stuff is annoying me.  It's gone on too long.  WTH are they going to do with dirt on Piscatella, anyway?  

This has all gone on too long.  I enjoyed it for three eps and by the middle of this one, I was done.  I mean, I'll keep watching but they better have something more to come.  

Yeah I agree. Red is basically  a caricature now. 

Edited June 19, 2017 by knaankos

[Paloma]

I kind of liked Alison's character in the previous season (can't remember if she's been in more than one before this), but her flashbacks now seem pointless and irrelevant to the current plot. At least with Frieda you can see a connection to current behavior, but so far I don't see anything in Alison's flashbacks that illuminates her current behavior--maybe because her current behavior isn't particularly unusual (aside from seeming more level-headed and intelligent than many others). Probably the flashbacks are eventually going to show how Alison ended up in prison, but in the context of the riot and so many other characters, it just doesn't seem that important. And I have a really hard time buying that such an intelligent and apparently feminist woman would urge her husband to get another wife (and be fine with it until the other wife made decisions about the child).

The flashbacks for Caputo's girlfriend also were unnecessary. We already knew how superficial, selfish, and scheming she was--did we really need to see her sorority days to confirm that? 

Overall, there were too many flashbacks and ridiculous scenes (such as the talent show and Red and Blanca going through files while on amphetamines or whatever) going on too long. I'll probably watch to the end because my husband likes the show, but I'm mostly bored now.

[Mama No Life]

On 6/16/2017 at 6:35 PM, piequinn35 said:

https://www.popsugar.com/entertainment/How-Orange-New-Black-Characters-Got-Prison-34949342

Here's a summary on the characters and their flashbacks and the assumptions that got them to Litchfield, no Angie flashback yet.

That was helpful!

Does it make sense that someone who murdered someone would be in jail with someone who committed food stamp fraud?

[tennisgurl]

Blanca and Red are so in synch now, they're literally speaking each others languages! I watched it twice, and Red said something in Russian when she was super excited, and Blanca replied in Spanish, and they both seemed to totally understand each other. Maybe they can read the subtitles?

Honestly, I'm so not sure how I'm supposed to feel about half the stuff happening in the riot at this point. Like, when the inmates were striping the guards, we were clearly supposed to be disturbed. But now, I have no idea if I'm supposed to find this funny and karmic punishment, or if I'm supposed to be horrified by how far the women are taking this. This show needs, I don't know, a laugh track or something, to let us know what I'm supposed to be taking from this. This show has always walked that fine line between drama and dark comedy, with forays into wackiness and social commentary, but I'm not sure how well its working this year.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Angie is definitely the kind of person who should not have ANY kind of power. It's not just because she's a racist ignoramus either. Look at how she treated her BFF Leanne because she was the one holding the gun, not Leanne.

I, too, thought that Magic Mike's plan was to shimmy close and steal the gun, so I was surprised that he just did his dance. His performance reminded me why I can't go to male strip clubs - I would just spend the entire time laughing. I can't take people seriously when they're trying THAT hard to be sexy and then humping other people.

[Clanstarling]

4 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I, too, thought that Magic Mike's plan was to shimmy close and steal the gun, so I was surprised that he just did his dance. His performance reminded me why I can't go to male strip clubs - I would just spend the entire time laughing. I can't take people seriously when they're trying THAT hard to be sexy and then humping other people.

Yep, I've only ever seen it on the screen - movie/tv/computer - and it only arouses my amusement. Which isn't to say I can't appreciate the bodies.

[Triple P]

How did Sophia end up handcuffed to the wall? 

[Hanahope]

On 7/11/2017 at 2:20 AM, Triple P said:

How did Sophia end up handcuffed to the wall? 

She somehow got out of the prison (not sure how, I thought Blanca chained/locked all the doors) and surrendered to one of the guards from Max who was sleeping outside "on guard".  He took her down to the Max prison and it appears she's in a 'holding' cell.

 

On 6/10/2017 at 9:30 PM, Kel Varnsen said:

I am starting to get curious how many bullets that gun has. Daya shot one into the ceiling, and one into the guard's leg. The meth girl has fired it at least two times now. I mean sure the inmates still outnumber the hostages by a wide margin, but the gun without bullets reduces their power quite a bit.

I'm wondering if anyones counting.  especially Caputo.

On 6/15/2017 at 10:07 PM, Clanstarling said:

My take away from it was, that if they could just have gotten past their differences, they were the only people who could understand what the other was going through. I thought it was a nice commentary on how we can be so polarized and not be able to recognize our commonalities.

That was exactly my thought, they actually had something in common, that they could support each other on, but their distrust of each other due to race/religion keeps them apart.

As to Alison's backstory, I don't know very much about the Muslim religion.  Does it really condone or even encourage bigamy like the Mormons do?  Her husband didn't "legally" marry the other woman, right?  that's still illegal in the US even if it is a religious practice, right?