Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[ShaNaeNae]

I sure do hope they get another car ASAP. Jill will not have time to be running the streets all day once Baby Dill comes along. Where is used car salesman Boob when you need him??

 

So I haven't been following as religiously (no pun intended) as I used to. I was over Jill's pregnancy somewhere around week 9, day 3, 9 hours, 13 minutes. Give or take an hour.

 

They only have 1 car? Really?  I saw the pic on P&H of them at the gym, her waiting. I just assumed it was because she's so clingy, she didn't want him out of sight. Makes me wonder if she's not pushing to get a 2nd car so she can use the excuse of knowing where he's at all the time.

 

I just strikes me as odd for a family with some money, a husband with a decent job can't get a second "cash car" just to run around town?

[GEML]

We couldn't afford a second cash car when our first child was born, and yes, we bundled said child up every time to take Dad to work and pick him up (I worked from home) and managed. No one thought we were clingy, just managing.

[3girlsforus]

We couldn't afford a second cash car when our first child was born, and yes, we bundled said child up every time to take Dad to work and pick him up (I worked from home) and managed. No one thought we were clingy, just managing.

I don't find the drive to and pick up from work to be clingy. That's what you do when you have one car. It's the 'lunch together at work' thing. If that's true that's just creepy.

[trimthatfat]

I'm sure the Dillards (even without JB's help) can afford another vehicle. From a practical standpoint and in the event of an emergency, IMO, Derick should have his own car.

Edited January 14, 2015 by trimthatfat

[bigskygirl]

What happens when Jill goes into labor, and she has the car? Will one of the Duggars go pick up Derick at work or will Jill drive to pick him up? I know people who make less money than Derick does and do not sell their souls to social media for a few bucks, and they can afford a decent second vehicle. Was it Derick's idea or did Jill talk him into not getting a second vehicle?

[MJDai]

I'm kind of loving this whole 2nd car discussion as it epitomizes USA values in a way. I feel it encumbent upon me as European to assure everyone that yes, you can live a happy, fulfilling and safe life without a second car. Or even *gasp* without any car at all.

 

If Jill and Derick choose to spend their money on something other than a car, well who cares?

 

I feel I am doing the snarking wrong here as it's directed at the forum rather than the subjects under scrutiny. I assure you, it is done with love. In retaliation, feel free to make fun of my car-less life. Or my apparent lack of knowledge of the boondock lifestyle.

[Fuzzysox]

What happens when Jill goes into labor, and she has the car? Will one of the Duggars go pick up Derick at work or will Jill drive to pick him up? I know people who make less money than Derick does and do not sell their souls to social media for a few bucks, and they can afford a decent second vehicle. Was it Derick's idea or did Jill talk him into not getting a second vehicle?

This! Seems strange considering that Boob knows how to buy cars at auction. If Jill does go into labor and she has the car poor Derick is SOL for sure.

I'm kind of loving this whole 2nd car discussion as it epitomizes USA values in a way. I feel it encumbent upon me as European to assure everyone that yes, you can live a happy, fulfilling and safe life without a second car. Or even *gasp* without any car at all.

 

If Jill and Derick choose to spend their money on something other than a car, well who cares?

 

I feel I am doing the snarking wrong here as it's directed at the forum rather than the subjects under scrutiny. I assure you, it is done with love. In retaliation, feel free to make fun of my car-less life. Or my apparent lack of knowledge of the boondock lifestyle.

I was born in a tiny town in Sicily were if you didn't have a car no problem since you can walk from the beginning of town to the other end in 20 minutes. But Jill and Derick don't seem to be living in a metropolis where everything within walking distance. They will end up getting another car because it's necessary unless Jill never wants to leave the house or has to call on her sisters or brothers to cart her around. Remains to be seen what they will do.

[Ljohnson1987]

What happens when Jill goes into labor, and she has the car? Will one of the Duggars go pick up Derick at work or will Jill drive to pick him up? I know people who make less money than Derick does and do not sell their souls to social media for a few bucks, and they can afford a decent second vehicle. Was it Derick's idea or did Jill talk him into not getting a second vehicle?

Jill is having a home birth, so there's no going to the hospital. Jill and Derrick seem attached at the hip, so I'm sure he'll probably be there when she goes into labor. 

[cereality]

Jill is having a home birth, so there's no going to the hospital. Jill and Derrick seem attached at the hip, so I'm sure he'll probably be there when she goes into labor. 

Has she said anything about a home birth or are we assuming? Couldn't she birth at that birthing center where Anna had her 3rd -- the one that's a long drive away; I'm not sure if that's her former work place or not. Plus as a corporate employee, Derick has benefits so she could go to any local hospital too. I do agree about being joined at the hip. If towards the end of the pregnancy, Jill is feeling contractions but is told by the doctors -it'll be a few more days-I can see him taking those few days off to be by her side -- unlike other young husbands who mostly go to work nervously and tell their bosses they may have to leave at any second. So likely he'll be home when it starts anyway. And even if he isn't, I highly doubt Jill and Derick are doing this without the Duggar family and a camera crew; when she calls her sisters/Michelle, one of them will just swing by WMT on the way and grab Derick.

[GEML]

"Going into labor" isn't like you can't do anything. When I was in early labor I finished up several appointments and was perfectly capable of driving. First babies take a long time in coming. Jill will have more knowledge than most, and will have plenty of time to get everyone where they need to be (where ever that is) in plenty of time. Even if she makes full use of her hospitalization.

Edited January 15, 2015 by GEML

[Barb23]

What happens when Jill goes into labor, and she has the car? Will one of the Duggars go pick up Derick at work or will Jill drive to pick him up?

 

Don't forget about Duggar time - you know they will have to load up the Stink Bus when they hear that dear Jilly Muffin is in labor, leaving poor Derick at work. (I'm just snarking, I know others can go get him)

[BitterApple]

Jill is having a home birth, so there's no going to the hospital. Jill and Derrick seem attached at the hip, so I'm sure he'll probably be there when she goes into labor. 

Is she really? Wow, I'm surprised because Jill looks like she is carrying really big. Even if she's planning on a natural delivery, I'd think it would be reassuring to know pain relief is available, just in case. She might regret that one once she's ten hours into labor....

[Rhondinella]

Hi, hope it's ok for somebody from the UK to post on this forum?!

 

 

NO!  We've completely banned everyone from across the pond!  You are only allowed to comment on Dr. Who, Sherlock and Downton Abbey.

 

Just kidding.  Welcome! :-)

[cereality]

Is she really? Wow, I'm surprised because Jill looks like she is carrying really big. Even if she's planning on a natural delivery, I'd think it would be reassuring to know pain relief is available, just in case. She might regret that one once she's ten hours into labor....

There may not be one answer to this, but does Jill (and do fundie women generally) HAVE to forego pain relief? As in -- is it one of those things where God made this a natural process, so there should be no need for an epidural and if you get one, you are being un-Godly; you should be willing to "sacrifice" by being in pain? Or is it the view that you should have as many as God gives you, but you can be "comfortable" in having them? I can't recall what Michelle does. Anna had home births and the last time got to the birthing center with minutes to spare, so I'm guessing pain relief was not an option. Though I know Kelly Bates has said that as she has gotten older, she just can't do it without an epi anymore. Or is the pain relief decision going to be made simply by where she delivers because it just won't be an option at home without adequate monitoring? Given that this is a first baby and she doesn't know what labor will be like and given that Cathy has told her that Derick and his bro were big babies, you'd think she'd opt for birthing some place where she could have pain relief if things got really bad. I know she wasn't a wife and mom yet, but wasn't she the one who was scared out of her mind with wisdom teeth (or was that one of her sisters)? You'd think she'd be somewhat more nervous with this, or even if she isn't -- you'd think Derick would say -- um no, this is our first, I have no idea what to expect, I really want you someplace where an army of doctors can tend to you and baby Dilly just in case there's a need.

[Mrsjumbo]

Hi, hope it's ok for somebody from the UK to post on this forum?!

I found this forum quite by accident the other day and have spent quite a bit of time....work time!...reading your comments and laughing to myself.

Love the names you have given some of them, the howlers makes me laugh every time i read it!!

The run up to Jills wedding is showing in the UK at the moment, I do like Derrick just wish he had a little more 'back bone' tbh, but who knows maybe once the wedding is over things might change, would love to see them be independent, even just a little bit, of Jim Bob....who makes my skin crawl.

If you have been to the U.S., here in the suburbs things are separated by expressways. I have to get on one just to take my kids to school. I live near Jerick.

I'm trying to imagine her biking the 20 miles to Tontitown with a baby in tow! As a lark I put in on my maps app as a walk from my house to Tontitown & it is 6 hrs, 41 min.

I think I posted the wrong quote. I meant to quote the poster who didn't understand why they would need a 2nd car.

Edited January 15, 2015 by Mrsjumbo

[KateUK]

NO!  We've completely banned everyone from across the pond!  You are only allowed to comment on Dr. Who, Sherlock and Downton Abbey.

 

Just kidding.  Welcome! :-)

Lol....thanks to everyone for the welcomes.

 

So pleased to have somebody to 'talk' to about this show, nobody I know watches it.

 

Was sad but not surprised to hear that Jill was expecting, I really hoped that her and Derrick would break free and live abroad for a while doing missionary work so Jill could see an alternative life style and wouldn't follow in her parents footsteps, but it seems they will become Mr and Mrs Jimbob mark 2.

[floridamom]

I don't know much about the kinds of midwives that this group of people enlist to monitor their care, but would that person be qualified to assess Jill's pelvic spread in regards to safely delivering a large Dillard baby vaginally? It's not just the pain management with drugs that would be available to her with an ob/gyn who is her doctor and is familiar with her pregnancy progress but what if she CAN'T deliver such a large baby and he's "stuck"? Wouldn't that put both mother and baby in needless peril?Also this is her first delivery, as mentioned, and they don't know what to expect. I cringed at watching poor stupid/young/inexperienced Anna suffer needlessly through her labor and delivery actually of all 3 of her kids. Jill, I'm afraid is in for a rude awakening as to what it is like to be on the "other side" of labor and delivery. I do hopethat all goes well for Bab Dilly, as he is an innocent participant in this matter. They need to put the safety of this child first not their Christian badges of honor to flash around.

This concern is coming from someone who has delivered children herself, ME. My oldest will be 27 tomorrow, and I remember every aspect of his delivery, so I speak from experience.

[Zahdii]

I'm sure that at the first sign of trouble Jill will go to the hospital, if she is planning on a home birth.  They can't be that opposed to hospital births, Michelle has had a bunch of her deliveries at a hospital.

 

Where I live midwives are required to work under the supervision of an obstetrician.  The OB may never actually see the mother, but I would hope that in a case where a first time mother looks to be having a large baby the OB would be watching developments and be prepared to step in if needed.

[Portia]

How far does Jill live from a hospital? My niece just had a home birth, and her midwife insisted that she deliver at the midwife's home because it's closer to a hospital. That was a high-risk delivery, however; they knew the baby was in breech position.

[Barb23]

I don't know much about the kinds of midwives that this group of people enlist to monitor their care, but would that person be qualified to assess Jill's pelvic spread in regards to safely delivering a large Dillard baby vaginally? It's not just the pain management with drugs that would be available to her with an ob/gyn who is her doctor and is familiar with her pregnancy progress but what if she CAN'T deliver such a large baby and he's "stuck"? Wouldn't that put both mother and baby in needless peril?Also this is her first delivery, as mentioned, and they don't know what to expect. I cringed at watching poor stupid/young/inexperienced Anna suffer needlessly through her labor and delivery actually of all 3 of her kids. Jill, I'm afraid is in for a rude awakening as to what it is like to be on the "other side" of labor and delivery. I do hopethat all goes well for Bab Dilly, as he is an innocent participant in this matter. They need to put the safety of this child first not their Christian badges of honor to flash around.

This concern is coming from someone who has delivered children herself, ME. My oldest will be 27 tomorrow, and I remember every aspect of his delivery, so I speak from experience.

Once again, I totally agree. I feel she thinks the bible verses they have been preparing will get her thru the hard throes of labor & yes, she's in for a shock. I'm hoping too they are preparing for possible complications due to Baby Dilly's size. Looking back on Anna's births, what stands out for me was ding-dong MEchelle saying Anna was doing "just fine" when in the background, she was writhing in pain. I, too, remember everything from my son's (complicated) birth 25 yrs ago :)

[Wellfleet]

There may not be one answer to this, but does Jill (and do fundie women generally) HAVE to forego pain relief? As in -- is it one of those things where God made this a natural process, so there should be no need for an epidural and if you get one, you are being un-Godly; you should be willing to "sacrifice" by being in pain? Or is it the view that you should have as many as God gives you, but you can be "comfortable" in having them? I can't recall what Michelle does. Anna had home births and the last time got to the birthing center with minutes to spare, so I'm guessing pain relief was not an option. Though I know Kelly Bates has said that as she has gotten older, she just can't do it without an epi anymore. Or is the pain relief decision going to be made simply by where she delivers because it just won't be an option at home without adequate monitoring? Given that this is a first baby and she doesn't know what labor will be like and given that Cathy has told her that Derick and his bro were big babies, you'd think she'd opt for birthing some place where she could have pain relief if things got really bad. I know she wasn't a wife and mom yet, but wasn't she the one who was scared out of her mind with wisdom teeth (or was that one of her sisters)? You'd think she'd be somewhat more nervous with this, or even if she isn't -- you'd think Derick would say -- um no, this is our first, I have no idea what to expect, I really want you someplace where an army of doctors can tend to you and baby Dilly just in case there's a need.

 

All very good points. I've never had a baby but I do know one thing. There's no way I'd want to be anywhere except a hospital for the first one. Hopefully with her prior knowledge of childbirth, and knowing that Derick and his brother were big babies, and that she's carrying quite large [at least we seem to think she is] Jill will be smart enough to at least be hospitalized this first time - to see how things go for her. And if she isn't, I hope Derick will assert himself - for a change - and insist on it.

[GEML]

I think the risk of going to the hospital is that the chances of a C-section sky rocket - even on " just to be safe" and once you've had a C section subsequent pregnancies become more risky to not have one. And after a certain point that decision no longer is in the mother's control. So I imagine Jill will almost certainly go to a birth center if not stay in her home.

[NikSac]

I think the risk of going to the hospital is that the chances of a C-section sky rocket - even on " just to be safe" and once you've had a C section subsequent pregnancies become more risky to not have one. And after a certain point that decision no longer is in the mother's control. So I imagine Jill will almost certainly go to a birth center if not stay in her home.

 

I have also known of people who switched to a home birth for fear of catching who-knows-what in the hospital. I've been quite sick for the last 2.5 weeks (flu I think), and at one point was so dehydrated I was falling down dizzy. People were urging me to go to the hospital but I didn't want to catch something even worse, so I wasn't going unless I really thought I had no other options. I'm not anti-hospital by any means but I do try to avoid it when at all possible. I'm sure the risk is much lower in labor and delivery, but I can see someone preferring home or a birthing center for that reason also. If that's even Jill's plan - I don't think we know at this point.

[BitterApple]

If Jill does opt for a home birth, I pray that, unlike Anna, she at least has somebody certified attending her.

[Chai]

Lol....thanks to everyone for the welcomes.

 

So pleased to have somebody to 'talk' to about this show, nobody I know watches it.

 

Was sad but not surprised to hear that Jill was expecting, I really hoped that her and Derrick would break free and live abroad for a while doing missionary work so Jill could see an alternative life style and wouldn't follow in her parents footsteps, but it seems they will become Mr and Mrs Jimbob mark 2.

HI there!

Welcome aboard !  :-)

 

I thought the same thing. OMG, why couldn't she have waited a year or two to enjoy being herself and being out of the house 

and into a new life with her husband? find out  what life is like not being a full time care giver to all your siblings. Take the time to know the person you didn't get a chance to before that quick marriage. But, really, that's all she knows. Sad.

[Barb23]

I still have the Jerick wedding on my DVR. (God knows why) & need to watch it again to confirm. When Jill was telling Boob that she was going barefoot at the wedding, Boob referenced the Barefoot & Pregnant line. I thought Jill said "oh not too soon" or something like that, giving me hope that they would put off babies for awhile.

[Almost 3000]

HI there!

Welcome aboard !  :-)

 

I thought the same thing. OMG, why couldn't she have waited a year or two to enjoy being herself and being out of the house 

and into a new life with her husband? find out  what life is like not being a full time care giver to all your siblings. Take the time to know the person you didn't get a chance to before that quick marriage. But, really, that's all she knows. Sad.

I just wanted her to finish her mid-wife training.

[riverblue22]

First babies don't always take a long time.  My contractions started two minutes apart and by the time I got to the hospital I was fully dilated and ready to go.  I'm certainly glad my husband (and car) were home with me at the time!

[Mrsjumbo]

HI there!

Welcome aboard ! :-)

I thought the same thing. OMG, why couldn't she have waited a year or two to enjoy being herself and being out of the house

and into a new life with her husband? find out what life is like not being a full time care giver to all your siblings. Take the time to know the person you didn't get a chance to before that quick marriage. But, really, that's all she knows. Sad.

I had lived on my own & had lived with a female roommate, but the first year of marriage really was a change for me. I'm glad we didn't have kids right away!

I can't imagine coming from the duggar house of chaos & going straight into marriage & pregnancy.

[Chai]

Count me among those that think Jill is in for a rude awakening about child birth. Even if you didnt read history books there are books like Time Life books that depict life for the american woman in early America first populating this land. It was described as .. " childbearing was considered a dread due to no hospitals or medical interventions" and we have a family worth millions putting their most precious in those same conditions.

[mythoughtis]

I'm kind of loving this whole 2nd car discussion as it epitomizes USA values in a way. I feel it encumbent upon me as European to assure everyone that yes, you can live a happy, fulfilling and safe life without a second car. Or even *gasp* without any car at all

 

 

In the USA,  it depends on where you live.   Josh and Anna live close (but not close enough) to Washington DC, where there is lots of public transportation that can get you lots of places.  Jim Bob and Michelle live in the country, next to a small town.  There is usually no bus service that can get you to the places you need to go, and definitely no train service.  Jill and Derick live in a larger town, but I would still guess that bus service only runs during the normal commute hours, and only on a few routes.  She can't get to her parent 's home without a car.... a taxi would be unafforadable on a regular basis.   They live about 30 minutes away, so she can't count on round trip pick-up from her sisters either.   

[crouton]

I still have the Jerick wedding on my DVR. (God knows why) & need to watch it again to confirm. When Jill was telling Boob that she was going barefoot at the wedding, Boob referenced the Barefoot & Pregnant line. I thought Jill said "oh not too soon" or something like that, giving me hope that they would put off babies for awhile.

 

IIRC, she said "not yet" meaning she wasn't actually knocked up at that moment, not that she was putting it off for a bit. Or at least, that's how I remember interpreting it.

[Barb23]

IIRC, she said "not yet" meaning she wasn't actually knocked up at that moment, not that she was putting it off for a bit. Or at least, that's how I remember interpreting it.

Thanks for your take & it makes sense. I did think it was weird she would say Not Yet & then in their TH's they were spewing the "we'll have as many kids as God gives us & doing nothing to prevent it" line.

[3girlsforus]

I remember the comment too but I was so distracted by it being so completely inappropriate for a dad to say 'barefoot and pregnant' to his daughter as she's about to walk down the isle that I was not mentally capable of evaluating the response.

[Jynnan tonnix]

Yup..."not yet, but wait 'til tomorrow" was probably the intended meaning there.

[GEML]

I remember the comment too but I was so distracted by it being so completely inappropriate for a dad to say 'barefoot and pregnant' to his daughter as she's about to walk down the isle that I was not mentally capable of evaluating the response.

I think that was Jill's reaction too, which is why she was trying to tell her father in a nice way, "you might be making people think I had sex when I didn't. Knock it off."

And given her quick pregnancy, unless she delivers exactly on time/late, there WILL be people who think that.

[BitterApple]

Given what a Kool-Aid drinker Jill is, I just can't see her having sex before marriage.

Edited January 16, 2015 by BitterApple

[GEML]

I can't either. Plus, she and Derick looked so uncomfortable with each other physically, they clearly hadn't done much touching.

It's yet another example of JB blathering on without giving a thought about how something sounds.

[Rhondinella]

Jim Bob and Michelle live in the country, next to a small town.  There is usually no bus service that can get you to the places you need to go, and definitely no train service.  Jill and Derick live in a larger town,

 

 

Ok enlighten me.  I thought Jill and Derick lived very near the Duggar compound, not in a separate city.

[Mrsjumbo]

They live about 30 min away from the Duggars.

[Fuzzysox]

Jill should be having her baby shower soon. I can't wait to see what they come up with. Hopefully it won't include root beer floats! Wait a minute it might include banana splits since she hoarded all those bananas. lol

[mythoughtis]

Ok enlighten me.  I thought Jill and Derick lived very near the Duggar compound, not in a separate city.



Jill and Derick live in (or next to) Rogers, Ark, close to Bentonville where Derick works.  I think they only live about 5 minutes from the church they got married in.  Jill has posted pictures of those crosses that can be seen from their patio.  My understanding is that it is 30 minutes from the Duggars ... who live outside of Tonitown?, even though TLC keeps showing a Springdale city limit sign.



Copy function not working, so couldn't add a quote about Jim Bob's 'barefoot and'... comment.  Given the apparent absolute adherence to the chaperone and touching restrictions that Jerick were commanded to follow, it would be unbelievable to think that sex occurred before marriage for them.   Now, Benessa, not so much (I think Jessa could (not implying she did) have snuck down to the shed at night at  if she had really tried).  Can't wait to see how these restrictions work when the younger children get of age, and the older children have fled the compound  

Edited January 17, 2015 by mythoughtis

[Zahdii]

Can't wait to see how these restrictions work when the younger children get of age, and the older children have fled the compound  

 

It's like that scene in the late '80's movie 'Parenthood'.  Watch it if you can, it's funny.  Anyway, one set of parents is called in to the school to talk with the principle (I think).  She tells the parents (Steve Martin and Mary Steenburgen) "Kevin is a very sweet, sensitive, extremely tense little boy.  He needs some special attention."

 

Steve Martin's character replies "It's a because he was our first.  l mean, l think we were very tense when Kevin was little.  lf he got a scratch, we were hysterical.  By the third kid, you know, you let them juggle knives."

 

No matter how hard you try, it's the same for (almost) all parents.  You have your ideals, energy, and time with the first kid.  Most parents adjust their childrearing beliefs as they go along.  Young parents gain more maturity, life experience, and confidence as time passes.  There's also the problem of realizing that as each new child arrives the parents must now divide their time, money, and emotional resources among the children. 

 

Ask any eldest child of a family where children were arriving every couple years, many of them will tell you that the younger children got fewer restrictions and more leniency from their parents. 

 

With the Duggars, it seems apparent that Michelle was very regimented and strict with her oldest children and trained them rather than parent them.  They drank the kool aid and as time passed and more children arrived, Michelle was able to pass off more and more of her parenting duties to her older children.  At first, even the older boys were pressed into service as 'buddies', but as more of the girls got older the children who were originally partnered with the older boys were reassigned to the girls.  It now seems that most of the grunt work of raising the children and the housework was in the hands of the three or four oldest girls, while the family as a whole existed just to be available for filming their show.

 

Roughly, the top third of the kids are somewhat functional in a limited capacity regarding their ability to appear to the general public as adults or near adults.  The middle third are mostly feral, and the bottom third are struggling.

 

I think that the Duggars will end up as an example of what not to do if you really want to raise a large number of children to become mature, independent adults capable of making their own decisions and making a positive mark on the world.  In the future, I see a lot of bewildered, lost adults wandering around trying to make sense of life and figure out how to get by.

[Rhondinella]

Please take further posts that are only about the Duggars' child-raising methods to the JimBob and Michelle thread.  Thanks.

[Higgins]

Americans value freedom and autonomy. For many that includes the freedom to come and go on our schedule as we please. I love being in the car by myself, listening to music and hitting the open road. So, gasp, I like having my own car and I'm not ashamed to say so.

[Sew Sumi]

I'm the outlier: a non-driving American. Unlike Jill, I live in a big city (all major sports are represented here, except for hockey...San Jose got that). I walk about a mile round-trip to hit the grocery and drug stores, as well as the gym, and about 8 options for great espresso. Not to mention the eats. I love my hood, but damn, its bones are from the 30's, and parking is scarce (and expensive). I am also a bus commuter; I work at a local community college, and again on a commuter campus, parking is scarce. Hubby drives to work because his shift starts at 5:30am, and busses aren't running through our 'hood when he needs to leave. 

 

Frankly, I don't know how any of you do it in the 'burbs, but it's definitely a two-car deal. Jill and Derick will get theirs...if it wasn't already gifted to them, but we just haven't heard of it. I think this scenario is highly likely, but they can't admit it, or there's no reason for Jill's smothering other than that she's really that suffocating. 

[NikSac]

Sew Sumi my brother is the same way. He lives in a large city with excellent public transportation. He can't imagine owning a car the same way I (suburbanite) can't imagine not having one. They have a neat service where you can pre-register for rental cars that are parked around the city and rent one for a day anytime you do happen to need one, which he usually does if he leaves the city. I think it depends a lot on what transportation is around, and it doesn't seem like they'd have much where Jill and Derick live. One good thing is if his work's only a few minutes drive from home, at least the driving back and forth isn't eating up a ton of time each day. I was originally picturing more like my commute to my former office which took at least 30 minutes each way during busy times, so I was thinking Jill was in the car for hours several times a day.

 

Still daily lunch together seems pretty "smother-y," but whatever works for them, I guess. I assume Derick could stop it if he wanted to.

[GEML]

I do think a lot of the lunches together are really just their actual dating. They've known each other really just a year, if you think about it, and for the first six months of that she wasn't even ALLOWED to go and have lunch with him. So they are only now finally dating.

[cereality]

Agree with GEML - they're in that lovey-dovey, I want to be around you all the time and I miss you when I'm not with you stage that girls go through when they're young and have their first boyfriend. Only they're married, so now it seems odd because at least in this country by the time people have been together for a year and are married -- the 'newness' has worn off because most practically live together before marriage -- even if not officially, they spend a lot of time in each others' homes and with each others' friends -- most have slept together etc. What they are demonstrating is how girls are with a high school boyfriend . . . .

[satrunrose]

Weird question maybe, but in Jill and Derick's world is it considered acceptable for a husband to heat up his own tupperware container of left-overs for lunch or is that seen as strictly "women's work"? Just wondering if that might be influencing the daily lunch dates (which, yeah, I find silly and clingy).