Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Chai]

YES. All other information on their wedding website was locked down except for registry information. Benessa's registry information was printed on their "save the date" card as well. The estimated value of the Dillards' registries: $20K. Benessa's registries were estimated at $30,000. (Asking for a Mac Air, an iPad and a kayak will cause that dollar value to soar.)

 

If they weren't expecting gifts from viewers and 1700/1300 wedding guests, why allow the registries to be public?

ugh! this just made me add something to the list of things that I can't stand about the Duggars! How can someone add an mac air, ipad or kayak to a gift registry? How greedy and inappropriate is that?  $30k gift registries is shameful.

[CatS]

There are many ways to wear a baby appropriately, but the way Jill was pictured with her ring sling is not one of them. You always want to be able to kiss the top of the baby's head when they're being worn in the front. You can't even see Iz's head. Fail.

[bigskygirl]

Jill and Derick can make me want to run outside screaming, but she does look good for someone who gave birth almost three weeks ago.

[Sew Sumi]

She looks good, but knackered. That pic was taken at Big Sandy, on the side of the house the Duggars were given to stay in (pictures were posted with many of the kids sitting in the yard of the same place).

[Sew Sumi]

Derick's post made me very angry. This man spent two years in Nepal. He wasn't too far from where all the devastation and loss of life is occurring. If it were me, I would be almost paralyzed by the fear that people I nurtured a relationship with were hurt, missing, or worse. I hate to make generalizations about missionaries; but, it seems as if most Fundamental Baptist missionaries see themselves as a golden opportunity for the people their aiming to convert instead of a recognizing that those people weren't "missing" anything. They had lives and religions and cultures that have worked for thousands of years. Therefore, when someone like Derick dismisses the pain and struggle of people who allowed him into their lives, it's shocking. I would have a massive amount of respect for Derick if he had, instead, tweeted: "Due to the devastating earthquake in Nepal, Jill and I will be donating the proceeds from this month's People magazine spread to send water, temporary shelter, and medical aid to the wonderful Nepalese people. We've created a gofundme account, please join us in helping our fellow man." Instead, while he and his wife sit in comfort and congratulate themselves for being proper Christians, people in Nepal are probably trying to survive. Telling them that Christ loves them and that they should look to the Lord is like telling a person who is on fire that they should look to the Lord while you're standing there with a fire extinguisher.

I just took another look at Derick's twitter. He has subsequently retweeted three ways people can donate cash. They are all  Baptist-based. No Red Cross for that boy! I wonder how choosy these organizations he referenced are about who their money goes to?

Edited April 26, 2015 by Sew Sumi

[abseedee]

Iz montage from Blessa. I really think she's trying to convince herself that she can do this mothering thing by hanging around Muffy's spawn. She has posted more pics of the kid than his parents! 

 

https://instagram.com/p/16EcvJDfsP/?taken-by=jessaseewald

 

edit 2 to add this pic Jessa just posted: https://instagram.com/p/16KDEHDfp-/?taken-by=jessaseewald

 

eta Derick's tweet re: the earthquake in Nepal. He's getting lambasted in the comments for basically handing people in need a bible rather than food, water, and shelter. A 7.9 50 miles from Khatmandhu probably leveled most of it. I told him to spearhead a Red Cross effort in his area. If he can't lead, at least do *something.* Don't just sit there and pray. 

 

https://twitter.com/derick4Him/status/591993873552920577

The corners of Iz's lips turn upward and looks like he's always smiling. 

 

[Wellfleet]

Jill and Derick can make me want to run outside screaming, but she does look good for someone who gave birth almost three weeks ago.

 

I've never had a baby so maybe I'm just not as suitably-impressed as I should be - feel free to let me know. But I'm thinking she should look pretty well. She's only 23. She didn't have to chase after any other kids while pregnant. She didn't work. She didn't have any kind of schedule to keep except to hustle Derick back and forth, which was just driving - and that was their choice. I doubt she did much cleaning or cooking. There were probably no financial stresses, and she was without a doubt showered with gifts for most of the 9 months. And while she did have major surgery, it has been, by now, 3 weeks of nonstop rest, probably being waited on hand and foot by husband and various sibs. Of course people all have different recovery rates and styles, I'm sure. But shouldn't she look fairly well by now?

Edited April 26, 2015 by Wellfleet

[zenme]

Those are cute pics of Izzy. I think Jimbo has got one of those mouths that upturns. So does Jessa...His lil nose is as wide as his mouth. Who's nose is that? I still can't get over how ginormous he is, and the photos of his with his eyes open he looks so alert!

[NikSac]

YES. All other information on their wedding website was locked down except for registry information. Benessa's registry information was printed on their "save the date" card as well. The estimated value of the Dillards' registries: $20K. Benessa's registries were estimated at $30,000. (Asking for a Mac Air, an iPad and a kayak will cause that dollar value to soar.)

 

If they weren't expecting gifts from viewers and 1700/1300 wedding guests, why allow the registries to be public?

 

Plus they made sure to publicize the street address for packages to be delivered.

[Darknight]

Plus they made sure to publicize the street address for packages to be delivered.

Now what if someone sent a bomb or gasp a naked magazine or something dangerous

[SpaghettiTuesdays]

The corners of Iz's lips turn upward and looks like he's always smiling. 

Awww, he's keeping sweet already. Or is that just for the wimin?

 

It's interesting to me how he seems so alert. He looks like an old soul. I like him already.

[EarlGreyTea]

Jill's hair looks the best I've ever seen it in that family pic posted above. Either  she trimmed it or it's true what they say - pregnancy can make your hair healthier.

 

Israel looks pure Jim Bob in all his photos, and the wide eyes are kind of channeling Jill's bug-eyed Instagram look. So there's some resemblance there. I will say I'm not all that  fascinated by babies, but this one is cute.

[salvame]

"eta Derick's tweet re: the earthquake in Nepal. He's getting lambasted in the comments for basically handing people in need a bible rather than food, water, and shelter. A 7.9 50 miles from Khatmandhu probably leveled most of it. I told him to spearhead a Red Cross effort in his area. If he can't lead, at least do *something.* Don't just sit there and pray."

By rights, Derrick should be heading to Nepal to help with relief care, right? ? Yeah, right.

Thank you, Jill, for the baby sling photo. I'm thinking we'll be seeing a lot of these in the future, giving just as bad a name to ring slings as your momma did to " my breast friend". (Still surprised the company didn't sue/shut her down for her misuse)

My family has used all types of baby slings. They are a wonderful tool for parents. But then again, my family can read and follow directions. They seek out advice from trained pros, not self-proclaimed "experts"

[Ljohnson1987]

Come on, Derick. Show your son that you have that servant's heart, and do something to help the people of Nepal.

[Upallnight]

I think those slings are so simple, yet so genius at the same time. Wish I'd thought of that 36 years ago when I was lugging around my first newborn who's weight was close to Izzy's. They are getting far more popular in the US now, I'm seeing them more and more frequently. I know I'm antique, but I like that it brings the baby right back to the mother in a way he can almost hear her heartbeat. He can hear her voice (albeit muffled) just like he could the months before birth. Plus it allows her to caress him and almost "hug" him every moment. That's a lot of weight to be lugging around any other way, and I think its a great idea. Babies are sort of "rubbery" anyway this soon after birth and they wad all up on their own. He's fine in that thing. Anyway, in another month or so, he'll be big enough to reach out and smack her and say "Hey! Get me OUTTA here!" if he's uncomfortable.

And I'm trying to think how Jill could win with us as the judge panel. If Derrick had been wearing the sling, we'd have said Derrick seems much more attached to Iz than Jill. If someone else was holding him, and he'd not been in the pic at all, we'd have said Jill was just like Mama Duggar, foisting that kid off and not dealing with him at all. :) As it is, she has secure possession of Iz and we're all griping about the way she's doing it. I'm cutting her some slack for this one.

.

Babywearing and ring slings are very popular. I'm 29 and pregnant with my 2nd and I would say more people than not own a carrier of some kind or at least interested. But the way Jill is doing it is not ok. Not only is it probably uncomfortable for both of them, it's not safe. Jill should be able to kiss the top of his head without too much bending of her neck. Edited April 26, 2015 by Upallnight

[Ljohnson1987]

No one is implying that Derrick should leave his wife and newborn and go to Nepal,  but raise awareness.

[irisheyes]

If he didn't want to put a link to the Red Cross site (http://www.redcross.org/support/donating-fundraising/donations/online), World Vision already has a dedicated link up (http://donate.worldvision.org/nepal-quake?campaign=10680820&gclid=CjwKEAjwmfKpBRC8tb3Mh5rs23ASJACWy1QP_peFTztcfNWSn6JZdvBYrZGesofV84i5y9q0kI7jbxoCQ43w_wcB). It wouldn't have been that hard to say, "Praying for Nepal. Go here to help."

ETA: sorry for the giant long links. Not sure how to make them short!

Edited April 26, 2015 by irisheyes

[Apple Clark]

I'm Christian and if I was sending things to a poor country I would certainly NOT send Bibles. I'd send money and clothing and if possible food of some sort. Canned goods and such. The Duggars are idiots...

[GEML]

The ugly secret is that most money from any organization (including the Red Cross) doesn't usually help the actual people living in what was often near poverty in these countries. Haiti, for instance, received billions in aid, but estimates put that less than 15% went to actual people. The worst thing Derick could do is hop on a plane. The best thing he could do is wire money to INDIVIDUALS there that he knows. But there is no way he can post that kind of information on social media.

[truelovekiss]

She's probably Lion King-ed him in front of the whole conference by now though.

While I love the Lion King reference, unfortunately Jilly Muffin probably wouldn't get it :( After all, Simba and Nala were alone together without a chaperone!

[Spencer Hastings]

Unfortunately, I think that Derick is probably damned if he does and damned if he doesn't. Anything he does will be spun in a negative light.

If he posts a couple of links about how to help and says that he's praying for the people of Nepal, he will be jumped on for not putting his money where his mouth is and be told to do more than post a link and pray. If he says how much he donated, he will be told it's for show.

If he spearheads his own campaign to raise money for relief efforts and starts collecting supplies, he will be going against *real* relief workers. Again, it'll be for attention.

If he hops on a plane and goes to Nepal, he will be ripped to shreds for leaving his wife and child, taking yet another day off work, and going to preach about his religion (even though we'd have no way of knowing that).

I really don't know what people expect him to do or not do in this situation. Whatever he decides, I'm sure the snark will be mostly unfounded and through the roof. We don't know what he is doing privately. We don't know how he's truly reacting. I've seen people on other forums ripping him to shreds already while having no clue what's going through his mind. He could have already donated $10,000 towards relief efforts but we would have no way of knowing that. Dude isn't going to be able to win.

Edited April 26, 2015 by Spencer Hastings

[Sew Sumi]

The ugly secret is that most money from any organization (including the Red Cross) doesn't usually help the actual people living in what was often near poverty in these countries. Haiti, for instance, received billions in aid, but estimates put that less than 15% went to actual people. The worst thing Derick could do is hop on a plane. The best thing he could do is wire money to INDIVIDUALS there that he knows. But there is no way he can post that kind of information on social media.

I know this. It's not a state secret. I just doubt that his Baptist funds are any better, and probably worse, since they likely target where aid goes, rather than spread the wealth. 

[JenCarroll]

Now what if someone sent a bomb or gasp a naked magazine or something dangerous

Oh, man. Now I'm dying to send them some copies of Playboy. Or Playgirl. Maybe both...

[GEML]

It's not a state secret, but most people don't know it. One major reason the damage is so devastating and so difficult to overcome is that these are countries that are poor with unstable governments. There's a reason the money gets lost, from even reputable charities and organizations. And it's not necessarily the fault of those organizations.

[DangerousMinds]

I doubt Derek did anything to actually help the people of Nepal when he lived there.  He was there to arrogantly tell the locals that their way of life was wrong.  He probably believes the earthquake was because of their sins or some bullshit like that.

I would love to know what kind of "work" he did there.

Oh, man. Now I'm dying to send them some copies of Playboy. Or Playgirl. Maybe both...

Just as useful as Bibles IMHO. I guess they could always burn them for warmth.

[GEML]

I actually bet they get a considerable amount of stuff like that. Politicians do - you'd be surprised what people will waste money on to show people how much they despise them. Of course the flip side is that people send them thousands and thousands in gifts.

It's probably someone in the family's full time job simply to process their mail at this point.

[JenCarroll]

I would love to know what kind of "work" he did there.

Just as useful as Bibles IMHO. I guess they could always burn them for warmth.

Please allow me to clarify, as it seems my words may have slipped out of their context. My comment about sending dirty magazines was in reference to the recently married Duggars and their outrageous gift registries, NOT the victims of the earthquake in Nepal. The two topics are running concurrently and are interwoven on the same thread, and I apologize if my post was unclear in any way. I did not and would not suggest sending skin magazines to impoverished earthquake victims.

Thanks.

Edited April 26, 2015 by JenCarroll

[DangerousMinds]

Sorry, Jen. I have a warped sense of humor and found it funny. No offense meant!

I did just read that Doctors Without Borders is sending several teams and lots of supplies.

[Missy Vixen]

It's probably someone in the family's full time job simply to process their mail at this point.

The mail is one of Jana's "jurisdictions" according to a recent 19KAC episode.

[GEML]

Now THAT is a group that will actually be useful and help.

[DangerousMinds]

I hope so!

[zenme]

The mail is one of Jana's "jurisdictions" according to a recent 19KAC episode.

 

Ugh! I just can't deal with these people.  So Jimbo and Michelle don't even open their own mail?? Seriously? What exactly do these two twits do all day?

[DangerousMinds]

Maybe someone should write a letter addressed directly to Jana with a detailed escape plan.

[Jellybeans]

One of my daughter's friend's works for a charity foundation which I won't name here. She had an opportunity to go on a mission to one of the countries in South America for a week. She said it changed her- her job was to teach the village how to acquire and maintain clean water supplies. She also said she had to give each family a Bible And she did not enjoy that part but the villagers loved the Bibles. She did not speak of God, etc but worked on the water issue. On her last day she was approached by the villagers and asked if they were not worthy of prayer? She said she had a come to Jesus moment and since most of her water projects were done, she prayed with them and had Bible class for them.

Her theory was they felt desolate and a Bible "would help them through the darkest of days".

I do not judge anyone's need for a Bible but I would rather have clean water.

[Micks Picks]

I was personally helped by the Red Cross, who gave me shelter for 5 days.  My sister had a houseguest for the weekend and did not offer me her couch, since her one houseguest had the bedroom.  The Red Cross put me up in a hotel.  I have a cold insensitive sister, I'm sorry to say.

 

I asked the question on the last page of what did Derick do in Nepal.  Does anyone actually know.   Was he what I usually think of as a missionary and help with clean water, construction, schools, ag and animal husbandry advise, or was he the John Shrader type and only teach the bible to those interested?  The Shrader type was provided by god with a plane and his wife (Anna Duggars's sister) was given a refrigerator by god.  Shrader himself has made 3 converts in a year and a half using that approach.  Does anyone know what Derick did?  I thought it was the first type since I'd never heard of the Shrader type.

[DangerousMinds]

I'm hoping he did more Peace Corps-type actual work, but somehow I doubt it.

[Sew Sumi]

Derick chose to be in the public eye. He should know by their leghumper fanbase that he's being looked to as a role model. A little statement about how he has personally chosen to help in the Nepal aid would be welcomed. No one said he had to hop on a plane and be at ground zero. Unfortunately for him, he now has the burden of reality celebrity thrust upon him. A few better-chosen words from him would actually go a long way in putting himself back in the snarker's good graces after the mess that was Cat Gate.

[Chalby]

Derick really does look like Shaggy (from the cartoon Scooby Doo), in that pic.

Yes he does, and every time I see him I think SHAVE ALREADY!!!!

[Missy Vixen]

Ugh! I just can't deal with these people.  So Jimbo and Michelle don't even open their own mail?? Seriously? What exactly do these two twits do all day?

I'd tell you, but the amount of brain bleach required to erase the image will overwhelm the Earth...

[Fosca]

Derrick did later suggest a few places to donate to help earthquake victims . . . after a lot of people asked him why he didn't give that sort of information in his first post.  Pretty much all his first post said to do to help was pray.  That's what made me roll my eyes a bit when I read it.

 

I need to give some money to Doctors Without Borders.  I donate to them when I can, because I think they put their donations to better use than other companies.

[Chalby]

If they weren't expecting gifts from viewers and 1700/1300 wedding guests, why allow the registries to be public?

Duggars elevated the concept of being tightwads to a whole new level. How crass.

[abseedee]

I was personally helped by the Red Cross, who gave me shelter for 5 days.  My sister had a houseguest for the weekend and did not offer me her couch, since her one houseguest had the bedroom.  The Red Cross put me up in a hotel.  I have a cold insensitive sister, I'm sorry to say.

 

I asked the question on the last page of what did Derick do in Nepal.  Does anyone actually know.   Was he what I usually think of as a missionary and help with clean water, construction, schools, ag and animal husbandry advise, or was he the John Shrader type and only teach the bible to those interested?  The Shrader type was provided by god with a plane and his wife (Anna Duggars's sister) was given a refrigerator by god.  Shrader himself has made 3 converts in a year and a half using that approach.  Does anyone know what Derick did?  I thought it was the first type since I'd never heard of the Shrader type.

I remember reading or seeing a picture of Derick and others talking to/teaching people (farmers?) about agriculture.  I'm not going to spend too much time looking for it but if I do I will post the link.

Edited April 26, 2015 by abseedee

[Missy Vixen]

Unfortunately for him, he now has the burden of reality celebrity thrust upon him.

The only reason why yesterday's huge Twitter gaffe was not front and center was because of the sheer amount of national and international news crowding it out. (White House Correspondent's Dinner/Nepal/Baltimore/Bruce Jenner, for starters.) He needs some (good) media training, stat.

 

One would think that Cat Gate was enough to show him this isn't all fun and games, but he's not going to learn until he says or does something so objectionable he loses his job over it, IMHO.

[Chalby]

Again, if I read it wrong, I apologize, but Derrick isn't in a position ti do much more than provide links to where people can donate. He's not the head if Walmart, just a lowly accountant.

I read this and thought, what? I have a sister who works for Starbucks and she has no problem donating money for supplies. You think being a 'lowly accountant' means he can't offer more than a link? I'd buy that argument if he never tithes any money to his church.  You and I both know that the people of Nepal embraced him, so the least he can do is help them out. 

Edited April 26, 2015 by Chalby

[Chalby]

Awww, he's keeping sweet already. Or is that just for the wimin?

Whenever I would note how much my newborn smiled, my mother would always remind me that smiling was just a lot of gas, lol.

Edited April 27, 2015 by Chalby

[mbutterfly]

Maybe someone should write a letter addressed directly to Jana with a detailed escape plan.

If I were a betting person, I would lay a solid bet that at least one person has already sent just such a secret escape plan to Jana. If she really does handle their mail, I'll bet there are some real hoots coming in. But should a young maiden be exposed?

[Chalby]

I need to give some money to Doctors Without Borders.  I donate to them when I can, because I think they put their donations to better use than other companies.

Good point, when I researched where the dollars went (during crisis donations) the majority of faith-based organizations only put 20 - 25% of donations to the victims. The rest was for administration and salaries. Doctors without borders is an excellent foundation.

[RazzleberryPie]

The ugly secret is that most money from any organization (including the Red Cross) doesn't usually help the actual people living in what was often near poverty in these countries. Haiti, for instance, received billions in aid, but estimates put that less than 15% went to actual people. The worst thing Derick could do is hop on a plane. The best thing he could do is wire money to INDIVIDUALS there that he knows. But there is no way he can post that kind of information on social media.

 

 

Unfortunately, I think that Derick is probably damned if he does and damned if he doesn't. Anything he does will be spun in a negative light.

If he posts a couple of links about how to help and says that he's praying for the people of Nepal, he will be jumped on for not putting his money where his mouth is and be told to do more than post a link and pray. If he says how much he donated, he will be told it's for show.

If he spearheads his own campaign to raise money for relief efforts and starts collecting supplies, he will be going against *real* relief workers. Again, it'll be for attention.

If he hops on a plane and goes to Nepal, he will be ripped to shreds for leaving his wife and child, taking yet another day off work, and going to preach about his religion (even though we'd have no way of knowing that).

I really don't know what people expect him to do or not do in this situation. Whatever he decides, I'm sure the snark will be mostly unfounded and through the roof. We don't know what he is doing privately. We don't know how he's truly reacting. I've seen people on other forums ripping him to shreds already while having no clue what's going through his mind. He could have already donated $10,000 towards relief efforts but we would have no way of knowing that. Dude isn't going to be able to win.

I totally agree with both of your, and I don't think his post said "Not there, don't curr, you brought this one yourself, you don't need help or money, just pray, you heathens."

 

What is Derrick going to do, teleport over there and single handedly save the day? Then it would be "how DARE he leave his infant and wife (who is trying to smother her baby in a sling), and not let anyone else help."

 

As for suggesting Baptist relief organizations, well, DUH. He's going to suggest his previous missions group and other groups with which he is familiar. Nothing wrong with that or with the Red Cross. He never said only send them Bibles and not food/shelter/medical care. He never said they brought this upon themselves for their sins. 

 

I personally remember when everything hit in Haiti, many, many church members who were very frustrated that they couldn't immediately go and start 'ministering' through clean up, medical care, child care, sending clothing, rebuilding, in addition to Christian based counseling/prayer. Haiti is much closer than Nepal, but for weeks, sending money was the best option, then sending clothing/food, then sending people to help rebuild. I'm sure Derrick will eventually travel back there and help in some capacity, but his immediate statement on social media was that it's a tragedy and to seek God's guidance. I can fault him for a whole lot of things, but saving Nepal in one fell swope is not one of them. 

[Vaysh]

Doctors Without Borders is an absolutely amazing organization that does good work all across the world (without them, last year's ebola outbreak could've easily turned into a pandemic) but I sincerely doubt that any Duggar would support them. They are far too vocal about and supportive of family planning, and with the Duggars, it doesn't matter how much good an organization does or how many lives it saves, if it supports access to contraception or abortion it is evil by definition.

Edited April 26, 2015 by Vaysh

[Bella]

We don't know whether Derick was a hands-on, lead by example, help-build-a-school type of missionary or one who just passed out Bibles. There are both kinds, and there is lots of space on the continuum in between.

 

It's okay to speculate, but please don't get heated about a possibility when we don't actually know what he did or didn't do.

 

Thanks!