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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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It annoys me that Michelle and JB were used in place of Jessa and Ben's kiss. Eww. What the hell is a "Duggar kiss" anyway? Jessa's becoming a Seewald, so technically it's not even about the Duggars today. Why didn't the Seewalds get singled out for a kiss? Ugh.

 

Her dress (if it's the same in the photo) was very pretty. I'm curious to see what the wedding party looked like. Hopefully she took a page out of Jill's wedding about what not to do!

 

I also wonder if now we're going to be subjected to another entire season of 19 K&C dedicated to Jessa and Ben's wedding.....and every Duggar spawn wedding thereafter. Seriously, this show could be on for the next 20 years!

 

It also bugs me they keep referring to the ceremony as private. Um, no. A 1000 person guestlist is not a private wedding, especially when camera crews and (probably) professional photographers were there. I would have laughed even harder if they'd tried to call it "intimate". The Duggars just don't want anyone else being able to sell their precious wedding shots before they do.

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Love Jessa's (modesty)alteration-free dress choice. I like Ben's outfit too, even the kinda-goofy coral bowtie--he looks more put together than Derrick did, IMO. I want to see the bridesmaids' dresses!

 

I think it's great that they didn't do their first kiss in front of a billion people, but they really had to leave in middle of the ceremony to go do it? That's even more awkward, gah! And I don't even want to think about MEchelle and Boob having a "Duggar kiss" in their place. cringe cringe cringe.

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I thought her dress very lovely, and in the world she grew up in, very daring. (Hardcore Fundy covers the collar bone) and the blush was practically admitting they had already kissed! ;)

Having JB and Michelle kiss - yuck. Never pass up the chance to be tacky when you could have been classy.

I'll be honest, and maybe here my Fundy roots are showing, but sometimes marriage does really make a man (or woman) out of you. This isn't to say the military isn't a good choice, but not everyone is meant for the military, just as not everyone is meant to marry young. There is no doubt in anyone who knows my husband and me that we were far more powerful and mature as a couple than we were as individuals. We both married at twenty. And we have, for lack of a better description, raised each other into adulthood. We've shared that, and sometimes it was miserable, but sometimes it was glorious. And we got exactly the adulthood that we wanted, and we got it together.

Hopefully Ben and Jessa get to have that too. That's the biggest advantage of marrying young.

I love this. My husband and I got married at 20 and are now 26. I feel like we've begun growing into adulthood together too. This year has especially been very good and I'm getting more excited for our future. I agree, it would be great for Jessa if they could have that too.

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And I bet not kissing was also her idea -- not because she's more Godly but because she doesn't want to be embarrassed in front of 1000 people as well as the magazines if they missed or if the kiss was sloppy or at an awkward angle or whatever;  this way they could both be pretty relaxed through the ceremony without thinking "uh we have to kiss in 90 seconds, OMG I hope it goes ok."

 

Or playing devil's advocate here - if they've snuck behind their chaperones' backs and kissed/made out/experimented already, they might give themselves away by being too experienced during their supposed wedding 'first kiss.'

 

Also, I find it really hard to believe that a couple of virgins who share their first kiss at their wedding can accelerate from kissing to full intercourse in one night (without a lot of mishaps at least).  If they do, it's got to be incredibly awkward and probably not pleasurable for either party!

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Ick at the idea of a "demonstration" kiss. Seriously JB & Mechelle just have to have eyes on them. Even if they were asked they could've said no. Barf.

I hope good things for Ben & Jessa. I got married young too & unfortunately we didn't grow well together & many miserable years later finally called it quits. It makes me oddly sad, in ways I can't quite identify, that they got married at FBC in Bentonville. That was my church growing up. I haven't been back in years but nostalgia is an odd thing. Sigh. Good luck little ducks.

Edited by ramble
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Can't snark on the dress because it was really pretty!

Wishing her happiness. Sounds like not having their first kiss was a stick it to you moment for her parents that now she can finally have some much needed freedom to be her own person!

And a further little dig at Boob and MEchelle in inviting them to demonstrate. We all know they loooove to indulge in OTT PDA.

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I've only read the People article but I DID NOT see that it implied that they left the ceremony to kiss, came back and then left again. Maybe it's more explicitly stated that way somewhere else.

 

What a beautiful dress .... and I didn't even know you could get a beautiful wedding dress for $245. Good news for someone with 3 daughters :-)

 

Edited because Did not means something different than did :-)

Edited by 3girlsforus
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I definitely don't believe things that the inquisitr puts out but I read this in an article about Jessa and Ben's wedding: “The Duggars think booze is a totally lame — and definitely not a necessary ingredient for a successful party. After accidentally having a sip of spiked punch, Jessa deemed liquor to be ‘disgusting.'”  If this was true, my big question is when and what environment would she even have had the opportunity to partake in the Devil's juice?

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Wow, Jessa's dress is gorgeous and suits her skin tone perfectly. I'm not feeling Bin's shirt and bowtie however. If he wanted to do a bowtie, fine, but his shirt needed to be dressier. I also think peach is too much of a spring/summer color to do for fall wedding bridesmaid dresses.

 

I love that Jessa gave a big FU to Boob by refusing to kiss at the altar. A first kiss is something special and should be kept private. I'm also happy to see Jessa had actual friends as bridesmaids, although it makes Jill look kinda lame that she couldn't srounge up anyone other than her sisters to be in her wedding. 

 

Regarding the Frito Pie, I love chili, but it certainly isn't a dish that everyone's stomachs can handle, especially little kids. It seems like a risky choice to serve the night before the wedding. Hopefully they had another option as well.

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Too many points to reply to but my take on a few:

 

My wedding gown cost me $100 plus another $50 for alterations.  I bought it on clearance and took it to the seamstress to fix the small seam seperation in the back.  You can buy a beautiful gown for under $300 IF you look hard.

 

Did anyone else catch Bin's BROWN shoes with his navy tux?  It's called "clashing".  Look it up Bin!

 

I'm actually glad we won't be subjected to that awkward first kiss between Jessa and Bin.  But having your parents do it in your place?  YUCK!  What exactly did the minister preach about while they spent 10 minutes snogging?  Why not save the kiss until you're alone after the ceremony (NO CHAPERONES to see you defraud yourself!)????

 

I still maintain that you can't progress from your 1st kiss to red hot monkey sex in a matter of hours.  One can only hope these "Duggar" grooms understand that.  Because they of course are NOW Duggar's and NOT their daughter's joining another family!

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I have a question about the way they invite people to these weddings. Does anybody know how/if a guest list is enforced? If they send out thousands of invitations and announce it online how could they enforce it?

I just wonder if a group of us could tease our hair, put on a faded denim skirt, wrinkled top and flip flops and crash the wedding?

I think about weird shit late at night when my insomnia hits.

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Very pretty dress. Proof that modest doesn't have to mean a bunch of unsightly alterations or a tee-shirt top. Hooray for Jessa and Ben keeping their first (married) kiss private. Horrible that the crowd was subjected to the awful spectacle of a J'Chelle/JBoob smooch instead. You just know they milked it for all it was worth. :(

I hope Jessa isn't moving out of the girls' room only to move into Ben's makeshift room on the property. That would suck. Will be interested in seeing where JBoob locates them, though, since he is still their only visible means of support. That definitely sucks. Sure hope that changes before long, but not holding my breath.

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According to the link (US Weekly, maybe?) posted above, their engagement episode is next week (we already knew that) and the wedding episode will be next season, so right around Pickle's birth. I imagine we'll get bombarded with wedding stuff, a breaking news episode about Pickle, and then the actual wedding episode.

 

Edit to delete a question I found on google.

Edited by SpaghettiTuesdays
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Very pretty dress.   

 

Horrible that the crowd was subjected to the awful spectacle of a J'Chelle/JBoob smooch instead.

 

 

I suppose the positive side was if there was no food at the reception it didn't matter. I imagine quite a few people lost their appetite after seeing that. If they air that part which they probably will I'll remember to have a bucket next to me to vomit in. 

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I just think it's so disrespectful to be bare foot in a church. Jill said both her and Jessa have been "walking in relationships" with her sister...

It is not disrespectful to be barefoot in a church!

Don't you think the ministers / preachers / pastors / lay leaders etc would've said "No" if they felt it was disrespectful?

I've been a Sunday School teacher; my mother was a lay minister; my children went on mission trips. I went barefoot often in church (never while working the kitchen though).

These arcane 'rules why people left the Catholic Church.

There's much to snark on w/the Duggars, but each wedding is different. As long as they're happy with it, then it's not for us to say what's right or wrong. Tacky or overblown (the Bates).

Let's just pray these kids work out okay since they're now stuck together.

Edited by roamyn
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It is not disrespectful to be barefoot in a church!

 

 

I think the choice to go barefoot for the wedding was simply childish behavior and solely for the purpose of seeking attention.  Why bother with the worry of the "right" dress when you spoil it with dirty feet?!  However, the issue of being barefoot inside a church isn't an issue as I am pretty sure Jesus was barefoot?

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It is not disrespectful to be barefoot in a church!

Don't you think the ministers / preachers / pastors / lay leaders etc would've said "No" if they felt it was disrespectful?

I've been a Sunday School teacher; my mother was a lay minister; my children went on mission trips. I went barefoot often in church (never while working the kitchen though).

These arcane 'rules why people left the Catholic Church.

There's much to snark on w/the Duggars, but each wedding is different. As long as they're happy with it, then it's not for us to say what's right or wrong. Tacky or overblown (the Bates).

Let's just pray these kids work out okay since they're now stuck together.

 

I agree it's not disrespectful to be barefoot in church. When we had a wonderful group of nuns visit our catholic church, one of them removed her shoes when she went up on the altar. It was a sign of deep respect.

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It is not disrespectful to be barefoot in a church!

Don't you think the ministers / preachers / pastors / lay leaders etc would've said "No" if they felt it was disrespectful?

I've been a Sunday School teacher; my mother was a lay minister; my children went on mission trips. I went barefoot often in church (never while working the kitchen though).

These arcane 'rules why people left the Catholic Church.

There's much to snark on w/the Duggars, but each wedding is different. As long as they're happy with it, then it's not for us to say what's right or wrong. Tacky or overblown (the Bates).

Let's just pray these kids work out okay since they're now stuck together.

When I was working in a mid-sized church one pastor wore sandals almost year round and common kicked them off and walked everywhere in the church barefoot. A lot of people didn't like it, but many other people felt it was Christ-like of him. Inside myself I thought he thought it was Christ-like of him, but I never commented. 

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Re: the barefoot thing.....we are talking about when getting married in a church, not doing work in a church when it's empty. Jill and Jessa were also walking around outside, in the church hall, reception, etc without shoes on. It's slightly a different thing IMO. We also don't know if the ministers knew these brides were going to be barefoot, maybe they didn't tell him that was their intent. Either way, they were inappropriately attired, shoe-wise, yet again.

BTW, I thought Ben's wedding coat and pants were very nice looking; a great shade of blue, but he lost the fashion contest with me on the shirt and shoes; he should have worn a white shirt, and black dress shoes....his tie was ok as it would have blended well with the rest of his ensemble...

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Shoes vs no shoes seems to be such a cultural thing that there is definitely no right or wrong. I, personally, pretty much only wear shoes when absolutely necessary, and while I'm not a huge fan on flip-flops, I DO stick to sandals for as long as weather permits.

 

Being a Navy wife, I have lived in Hawaii on and off for a good number of years (though I'm now back in Connecticut enjoying cool weather but lamenting the fact that it means closed-shoe season is coming), and most everyone out there removes their shoes when they come into your home. My father, on the other hand, is old-country Polish, and finds it very offensive to see someone's bare feet indoors.

 

I find, more and more, that I seem to be in the minority as far as not really ever bothering to think about someone's feet to the extent of actually looking at them...I focus on faces, and even clothing tends to be more or less peripheral to my notice, but because so many people DO seem to be so focused on footwear and the state of the feet within, I do make an effort to have my feet presentable. They will never be pretty, but I have flat, size 9 wide feet with stubby toes, so they really are never going to be pretty in any case. They are perfectly functional, though, which is the most important thing.

 

As for shoes in a church, I'm not much of a churchgoer, but having been raised Catholic, it would have never occurred to me not to wear shoes to Mass...but, again, there are religions where shoes are left outside and do not sully the sacred space. As has been mentioned, Jesus was likely barefoot as often as not, and wasn't Moses commanded to remove his shoes on the sacred ground around the burning bush?

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I've only read the People article but I see that it implied that they left the ceremony to kiss, came back and then left again. Maybe it's more explicitly stated that way somewhere else.

 

What a beautiful dress .... and I didn't even know you could get a beautiful wedding dress for $245. Good news for someone with 3 daughters :-)

The gown that Jessa wore was not $245. That link was to a Chinese knock off site. The real Allure gown that she wore was at least $1000.

Edited by Higgins
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Chances are that she didn't pay a penny for it though, cos we all know how the Duggars persuade businesses to give them freebies in exchange for free "advertising' on their show. So it really is a moot point. Their whole frugality schtick is just that....a schtick. They're petty grifters.

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It's not moot to the people who are posting about what a beautiful dress you can get for $245. While you may be able to get a beautiful dress for that. You can't get the Allure Bridal that Jessa wore.

ETA: The dress is gorgeous and on trend. Ben looked like a dork and didn't match the blush gown at all. Bad choice in colors to go with a blush gown IMO.

Shoes vs no shoes seems to be such a cultural thing that there is definitely no right or wrong. I, personally, pretty much only wear shoes when absolutely necessary, and while I'm not a huge fan on flip-flops, I DO stick to sandals for as long as weather permits.

Being a Navy wife, I have lived in Hawaii on and off for a good number of years (though I'm now back in Connecticut enjoying cool weather but lamenting the fact that it means closed-shoe season is coming), and most everyone out there removes their shoes when they come into your home. My father, on the other hand, is old-country Polish, and finds it very offensive to see someone's bare feet indoors.

I find, more and more, that I seem to be in the minority as far as not really ever bothering to think about someone's feet to the extent of actually looking at them...I focus on faces, and even clothing tends to be more or less peripheral to my notice, but because so many people DO seem to be so focused on footwear and the state of the feet within, I do make an effort to have my feet presentable. They will never be pretty, but I have flat, size 9 wide feet with stubby toes, so they really are never going to be pretty in any case. They are perfectly functional, though, which is the most important thing.

As for shoes in a church, I'm not much of a churchgoer, but having been raised Catholic, it would have never occurred to me not to wear shoes to Mass...but, again, there are religions where shoes are left outside and do not sully the sacred space. As has been mentioned, Jesus was likely barefoot as often as not, and wasn't Moses commanded to remove his shoes on the sacred ground around the burning bush?

I hate bare feet anywhere. I will tolerate them at the beach or pool since I have to but I hate when people remove their shoes at my door and enter my house without shoes. I know a lot of people consider it polite but, not me.

ETA : too is different than to.

Edited by maraleia
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I think removing shoes to enter a home or church is a sign of respect if the feet are clean.  If you are saying that you don't want to bring in dirty shoes and so go in with clean feet it does make a lot of sense.  But to go into a place with filthy feet is pretty disgusting IMO.

 

I'm not sure why everyone thinks Jessa is going to go more fundie than her parents.  Jessa is a very practical girl.  I wouldn't be surprised to see her in pants someday (not on the show of course--must keep up the image!)  And Jessa will not want a zillion kids.  I think she will look at Ben's family and realize that you don't have to go completely overboard.

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The gown that Jessa wore was not $245. That link was to a Chinese knock off site. The real Allure gown that she wore was at least $1000.

 

Well bummer but I'm not surprised. It's beautiful and Allure is a brand I've heard of so I figured it was unlikely to be that inexpensive. Even still, if something that beautiful is in the $1000-$2000 range that's much better than what you see on these shows were you say your budget is $3000 and they look at you like you should have gone to Kmart.

Edited by 3girlsforus
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I wonder what MEchelle thought that Josie wasn't a flower girl. I'm glad Jordyn got to be one & for once, she got to be in the spotlight.

I thought it would have been nice if they had mentioned Grandpa Duggar & MEchelle's parents in the program. Even tho they weren't physically there, a little mention would have been thoughtful.

  • Love 1
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I definitely don't believe things that the inquisitr puts out but I read this in an article about Jessa and Ben's wedding: “The Duggars think booze is a totally lame — and definitely not a necessary ingredient for a successful party. After accidentally having a sip of spiked punch, Jessa deemed liquor to be ‘disgusting.'” If this was true, my big question is when and what environment would she even have had the opportunity to partake in the Devil's juice?

Supposedly the J'slaves were at a political event and the drink contained alcohol.

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Regarding Ben's shoes, apparently GQ agrees that dark brown shoes (as long as they aren't light brown or tan) are appropriate and perfectly acceptable with a navy suit. According to the article they should be as dark as the suit, which looking at the wedding photo, Ben could have chosen a bit darker brown shoe. I don't think he's that far off though.

http://www.gq.com/style/style-guy/shoes/200501/navy-suit-brown

Edited by msblossom
  • Love 3
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I don't know, I just can't get on board with bare feet in a church, especially at a wedding. To each his own, though.

 

Regarding Josie, I'm sure Jessa took one look at how she misbehaved during Jill's ceremony and said hell no to her being a flower girl. 

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Supposedly the J'slaves were at a political event and the drink contained alcohol.

Thanks for the info! But why would a political event have spiked punch; I could understand wine or champagne? Maybe it's the norm since I've never been to one but I associate spiked punch with things like house parties or cookouts. 

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Don't you think the ministers / preachers / pastors / lay leaders etc would've said "No" if they felt it was disrespectful?

I've been a Sunday School teacher; my mother was a lay minister; my children went on mission trips. I went barefoot often in church (never while working the kitchen though).

These arcane 'rules why people left the Catholic Church.

 

I honestly don't think God cares if one is wearing shoes or not.  These things vary from culture to culture, and society to society. 

 

It just looks tacky and inappropriate for the setting.  They weren't married on beach, or out in nature anywhere.  Just like I wouldn't got to a court house, a restaurant, or meet the President barefoot, I wouldn't get married in a church barefoot.  That's just me though, and if Jessa is okay with getting her feet blackened with all manner of filth, that's her prerogative.  I'm sure her groom could care less if she climbs into bed with dirty feet or not. 

 

It was a beautiful gown, and a lovely shoe would have made the look even prettier.  A bejeweled ballet flat would have been adorable.  Do they think they are trying to be boho chic or trendsetting? Once again, the Duggar bride could have had a more professionally finished hairstyle.  It just looked "everyday" and kind of scraggly.  Even worn long, a good professional hairstylist could have given her a better look with more body and volume.  It could have looked more polished.  

 

As for the Frito Pie, I love it! I just would never serve it at that type of event.  Maybe as a quirky option or alternative, but not as the "real" entree.  Why do these people insist on serving carnival food? 

 

As for Ben's brown shoes and navy suit, it's a thing.  He just didn't pull it off very well.  Once again, Jeremy Roloff achieved the look flawlessly in his wedding attire. 

 

lpbw-jeremy-audrey-wedding-05.jpg

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All I can think of, is how Jana, Jinjer, and Joy are going to be really weighed down with child-care and cooking duty now that Jessa is married. I feel really bad for them.

It wouldn't be so bad if the rest of the family got off their lazy asses and helped. The only real little kids in the house are Josie and Jordyn. Everyone else should be able to take care of their personal needs and pick up after themselves, as well as help with chores.

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It seems to me that especially with something like a wedding gown, unless it's something you plan on passing down to potential daughters (who may or may not like the design in any case), there's not much wrong with a knockoff gown. Assuming the fit is good, which even in a knockoff, it may be, and assuming it's put together well enough to withstand one wearing, it hardly matters whether all the details and all the finish work are meticulous. It's a "big picture" item to my mind, and as long as it looks and fits like the gown which inspired it, finding a knockoff for a fraction of the price can only be a good thing. But I've never been into designer labels, and they may be important to some.

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I don't think anyone was implying there's anything wrong with a knockoff gown. I think the previous poster was just trying to mention that Jessa's gown was in fact from the designer, meaning she got it for free or heavily discounted. I think the bigger theme here is the Duggars' hypocrisy over claiming to be so thrifty when they eagerly scrounge for freebies and handouts.

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I liked Ben's choice mainly because it was a fall wedding and it fit the season which I appreciated. I also liked the deep coral because it was picked up in the flowers. Now the big question is how the wedding party coordinates and in particular the bridesmaids. So far so good.

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It seems to me that especially with something like a wedding gown, unless it's something you plan on passing down to potential daughters (who may or may not like the design in any case), there's not much wrong with a knockoff gown. Assuming the fit is good, which even in a knockoff, it may be, and assuming it's put together well enough to withstand one wearing, it hardly matters whether all the details and all the finish work are meticulous. It's a "big picture" item to my mind, and as long as it looks and fits like the gown which inspired it, finding a knockoff for a fraction of the price can only be a good thing. But I've never been into designer labels, and they may be important to some.

Except it is illegal to sell a gown advertised as Allure Bridal made by a knock off company. I have read many posts by brides who purchase from these sites and usually it is a disaster. They are cheap looking with poor quality workmanship that is very noticeable. There are some sellers that will make a somewhat comparable decent quality inspiration dress but the site posted earlier in the thread actually advertises the dress as Allure with the model number. That is infringement.

I liked Ben's choice mainly because it was a fall wedding and it fit the season which I appreciated. I also liked the deep coral because it was picked up in the flowers. Now the big question is how the wedding party coordinates and in particular the bridesmaids. So far so good.

I just don't think the whole outfit looked good together. The coral and the gray shirt and the navy is too much especially with the bow tie and her soft blush gown. I think a white shirt would have been better. As long as they liked it, it doesn't matter.

Edited by Higgins
  • Love 4
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At first look, I didn't really care for the color of Ben's shirt combined with the orangey-red bow tie and thought a white shirt would look better also. It's just not my preference, not that it matters to J and B. Seeing the whole wedding party together and a photo of the couple standing up will help form my opinion better. Regardless, I do think they look 10x better than Jill and Derick.

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Regarding flower girls, for an informal wedding, lots of little girls rolling around on stage can be quite charming. I also think that Jill, who genuinely likes small children and is family inclusive, liked including everyone.

I've always felt that during her younger years, Jessa acted out, desperate for attention. (See jewelry box story). She was the original "lost girl" and this, likely along with some natural temperament, likely taught her to never show emotion or desire or anything that JB or Michelle could take away from her as a way of "building character."

I think this goes a long way to explaining how odd her relationship has been. When something is under that much control, by acting like you don't want it may be her only way of getting it.

And I also think it explains why only Jordyn- she knows how special it feels to be little and be singled out. And Jordyn was her buddy.

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And I also think it explains why only Jordyn- she knows how special it feels to be little and be singled out. And Jordyn was her buddy.

 

GEML, I think you analysis is very insightful, but I didn't understand your remark about Jordyn. Could you elaborate?

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