Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[louannems]

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=738630896270562&id=510067475793573&refid=17&_ft_=top_level_post_id.738630896270562%3Atl_objid.738630896270562&__tn__=%2As

Jessa and Ben's newest religious video. I haven't had the heart to watch it.

[lookeyloo]

Didn't watch the video but the comments are interesting. I wonder if Benessa read them or even understand them

[MichaelaRae]

Oh, you are so right! Jinger is so very tiny! I want to see Jessa!

 

Oh, honey...you aren't going to see Jessa until she's gotten rid of all that Spurgeon weight. Ideally with a People cover about how she prayed the baby weight away.

[SometimesBites]

Didn't watch the video but the comments are interesting. I wonder if Benessa read them or even understand them

Amazing how much self-righteous certainty can be packed into the psyches of two near-teenagers. Guess they didn't read the one about a haughty spirit leading to a public pratfall. It'll happen. I just want a front-row seat.

[BitterApple]

I bet Jessa was pissed when People didn't dip into the Photoshop budget and trim her down for their featured spread.

[lookeyloo]

They are just so arrogant!!!

[dillpickles]

https://www.instagram.com/p/-pQOS1jfoU/

Jessa is SO VERY TINY, just 3 weeks post partum.

I barely recognized Jana, at first, I thought it might be Tabitha, the homeschooling teacher.

Is this the first we've seen of Jessa, since the birth, out of the hospital? She is so wan that I do wonder if she was dangerouly I'll, post-partum. If she is healthy, then she looks wonderful! After my first, I also bounced back quickly, thanks to my jogging/walking 3 miles daily during pregnancy, plus excersise.

"Some of my favorite people right here"

Awh, she couldn't photoshop Jill in there? Girl needs some sista lovin'.

[Almost 3000]

I see Jana, JoAnna, Jinger and Bin in the pix but not Jessa. The thin one is Jinger.

eta: Joy-Anna not Jo

Edited November 30, 2015 by Almost 3000

[FakeJoshDuggar]

According to Ben:

1. The 'Lord' made everyone.

2. Everyone deserves to be damned.

3. Children are a reward from the 'Lord'.

Interesting fellow making everyone to be deserving of damnation and rewarding atheists equally with children.

Whoa. Children are a reward from the Lord? Uh, even cockroaches reproduce, let's not go overboard.

[Fuzzysox]

"Some of my favorite people right here"

Awh, she couldn't photoshop Jill in there? Girl needs some sista lovin'.

But, but, but Jill is on a holy mission for JESUS don't you know saving the poor villagers from being unGodly Catholics and painting their nails of course. THIS is important work she can't be bothered to meet Bam Bam and risk her leghumpters not sending $$$$$$$$ to continue their important work.

[Sew Sumi]

Apparently, Jessa is still endorsing Jesus' December birthday, as opposed to Spurgeon's teachings.

Sorry, I can't paste her Insta post on my phone. It's the post in which she praises Jinger's piano playing (she went on a posting barrage, but the other ones are merely pathetic).

[BitterApple]

No wonder Erin Bates was practically suicidal because it took her a whopping year to have a viable pregnancy. If children are a woman's reward, then I'm assuming lack of children is a form of punishment. That's an incredibly dangerous philosophy to live your life by.

[DoctorWhovian]

https://www.instagram.com/p/-pQOS1jfoU/

Jessa is SO VERY TINY, just 3 weeks post partum.

I barely recognized Jana, at first, I thought it might be Tabitha, the homeschooling teacher.

Is this the first we've seen of Jessa, since the birth, out of the hospital? She is so wan that I do wonder if she was dangerouly I'll, post-partum. If she is healthy, then she looks wonderful! After my first, I also bounced back quickly, thanks to my jogging/walking 3 miles daily during pregnancy, plus excersise.

 

They've come along way from the Little House on the Prairie. But Ben needs to take the hat off now. I think white boys stopped wearing sideways hats back in 1994. 

[SometimesBites]

They've come along way from the Little House on the Prairie. But Ben needs to take the hat off now. I think white boys stopped wearing sideways hats back in 1994. 

And which person does little Benny actually want to embody when he grows up? Sick sideways-hat dude or mature Christian hellfire apologist fellow? He's a typical immature, know-it-all, post-teenage dork, trying on costumes to see how they fit. So far, none of them work.

Edited November 30, 2015 by SometimesBites

[Churchhoney]

And which person does little Benny actually want to embody when he grows up? Sick sideways-hat dude or mature Christian hellfire apologist fellow? He's a typical immature, know-it-all, post-teenage dork, trying on costumes to see how they fit. So far, none of them work.

 

Wonder whether he sees the hip dude (haha) persona as a possibility for boosting his career as a Calvinist teevee preacherman who'll appeal to millennials because he's just so ... cool. (haha). 

 

That was sort of the Mark Driscoll/Mars Hill approach, wasn't it? Before MD showed his true colors as massive grifter and overall mean guy. 

[Tabbygirl521]

YES re: Mark Driscoll. Initially Mars Hill seemed pretty OK. I had a coworker who joined, along with her husband. Two of the nicest, normal people you would ever meet. They went with the church to do restoration work after the tsunami is SE Asia. They were super involved with the church, then suddenly moved from Seattle to small-town Oregon. It seemed odd for them to leave their church so suddenly. But looking back, the true colors were probably starting to show.

Ben does seem like he is trying to be all hip and modern and whatnot. But he needs charisma and a message of hope. Something uplifting and positive and illustrative of Gods LOVE. The negative haranguing will attract less than mentally healthy people, I think. Still, bodies in the seats. All that matters, I guess.

[SometimesBites]

The litmus test for just how problematic a church or a religious group is or might become, one that seems pretty universal is this: what do you teach about the female half of the human race?

 

If the teachings place specific restrictions on women that makes them subservient to men, muzzles when or with whom they can interact, or creates laws about how they dress or what they will be allowed do with their lives--there WILL be a problem. It's not a matter of IF, only a matter of WHEN. It's a sure sign that the male subset of that group is insecure, power-hungry, unbalanced, and emotionally immature--and any women who willingly debase themselves are just as problematic. Notice how often, when these groups have unraveled, the sexual abuse of young females eventually became part of the problem. These are men who want dominance and obedience, elements which have no place in healthy adult relationships. None. When forcing grown women to submit to such unreasonable ideas becomes too much work, they turn to immature girls.

 

Interesting to me that President Jimmy Carter has come around to the understanding at this later part of his life that the maltreatment of females is the number one problem in the the world.

Edited December 1, 2015 by SometimesBites

[Vaysh]

SometimesBites: That was one of the best, most succinct and well articulated texts on the problems of patriarchal religions and cults I've read. You nailed it. And it makes me furious that these tiny little "men" get away with their oppression of women and children by hiding under the guise of being religious and holy, when it's really their own neuroses and hunger for power that's driving the bus.

[Missy Vixen]

Wonder whether he sees the hip dude (haha) persona as a possibility for boosting his career as a Calvinist teevee preacherman who'll appeal to millennials because he's just so ... cool. (haha). 

 

That was sort of the Mark Driscoll/Mars Hill approach, wasn't it? Before MD showed his true colors as massive grifter and overall mean guy. 

Bin won't be able to stomach the concessions Driscoll made to hang onto his flock -- namely, he's fine with those in the church that smoke, drink and listen to rock n' roll. The hipsters that hang at Mars Hill would never go for the typical fundie rules and neither will the vast majority forced to listen to Bin's "theology".

[Churchhoney]

Bin won't be able to stomach the concessions Driscoll made to hang onto his flock -- namely, he's fine with those in the church that smoke, drink and listen to rock n' roll. The hipsters that hang at Mars Hill would never go for the typical fundie rules and neither will the vast majority forced to listen to Bin's "theology".

 

Oh, heavens no. I didn't say he was going to succeed. He has neither the brains nor the personality nor, perhaps, the larceny in his soul to get himself a church. I was just responding to the idea that his wanna-be "cool" clothing might be at odds with his grumpy Victorian Calvinism. And Mars Hill was Calvinist and had its Victorian elements, too, such as their views of women, but with a major side of rock music and hipster stuff. So a millennial-appealing style certainly can go along with fire-and-brimstone theology underneath. 

 

But luckily Ben's just a little dumb guy who'll never start a big rotten megachurch or grifting teevee ministry. So for that we should all be thankful (even Ben, although I suppose he'll never realize it.) 

[GeeGolly]

I'm not familiar with many TV evangelists, but I assumed that to grow a congregation they would need charisma, a loving hopeful message, and a place of comfort.  I don't see Jessa and Ben having charisma or loving messages, nor do they seem to be offering hope or comfort.

 

But like I said I don't know the typical modus operandi of "successful" evangelists. 

[queenanne]

I'm not familiar with many TV evangelists, but I assumed that to grow a congregation they would need charisma, a loving hopeful message, and a place of comfort.  I don't see Jessa and Ben having charisma or loving messages, nor do they seem to be offering hope or comfort.

 

But like I said I don't know the typical modus operandi of "successful" evangelists. 

 

No, that's about it, with a heaping helping of "prosperity gospel" tossed in on there for most as well.  

 

You can be energetic; you can be smart; you can exude peace and make people want to bask in the warmth of your soothing voice.

 

What you generally can't do, is hector at them like Jonathan Edwards, ranty and fiery-eyed about infinitesimal spiders.

[Temperance]

Whoa. Children are a reward from the Lord? Uh, even cockroaches reproduce, let's not go overboard.

One of my all time favorite posts. Mike drop. Awesome.

[BitterApple]

Yeah, people are more likely to donate when you're telling them that God wants them to be successful, rich and driving a Ferrari. You'd think Bin and Jessa would've gotten a clue by now.

[Churchhoney]

They're young. Given half a chance, they'll figure out a better, i.e., positive "God Wants You to Prosper, Just Follow MEEEE!" approach to evangelistic grifting.

 

But when they do, they'll have to cover up all the negative nelly stuff they've been posting on SM these days. Like turds in a cat box. And hope the scent never rises up to undermine them.

Well, I guess that would at least show that they have the ability to learn something. With Duggars, that's pretty much always in doubt, i think.

[louannems]

https://m.facebook.com/duggarfamilyofficial/photos/pb.510067475793573.-2207520000.1448980093./740726019394383/?type=3&source=54&refid=17

Jessa loves sisters Joy and Jinger

[kokapetl]

https://m.facebook.com/duggarfamilyofficial/photos/pb.510067475793573.-2207520000.1448980093./740726019394383/?type=3&source=54&refid=17

Jessa loves sisters Joy and Jinger

I think that's Jinger saying she loves Joy-Anna.

[Defrauder]

I'm so sick of the side hair.  Ever since Michelle hit the airwaves way back when we've been subject to picture after picture of Duggar females putting all of their hair hanging on one side down the front.  It's like a wildlife mating call of some kind.  Now we have Ben with the side hat. 

[kokapetl]

Side hugs are very tv friendly, both of the huggers face the camera. Coincidence?

Edited December 1, 2015 by Kokapetl

[neural-plasticity]

The only thing Jessa and Bin have going for themselves is the fact that when 19 Kids and Counting was on, they smiled, said nice things, etc. That's where they got their fan base from. If they had to completely start from scratch like most Evangelicals who aren't raised being on national television, not nearly as many people would be interested in listening to their doom and gloom rants. 

[sometimesy]

What happened to all the selfies Jessa? The sausage casing style?

 

Isn't Bin opposed to Xmas? Isn't Jessa at Xmas central shooting video? I suppose if the nannies have choir practice she has to put herself out and go to them. You don't want birth moms getting too attached to their arrows.

[BitterApple]

The thing that really pissed me off about that video is all the people sitting around who could've helped out with Mere and Spurge.

[Pachengala]

Spurge! Thank you for reminding me anew of what a terrible, terrible name that is. It's like a verb for something revolting.

[RazzleberryPie]

I think that's Jinger saying she loves Joy-Anna.

 

Dang, Jinger is co-dependent. Sorry Joy-Anna. Glad you're allowed at the Big Girls' table now, but sorry you now have a permanent leech, well at least until one of you is married off. I guess Jill isn't the only one who can't function without a 24/7 bestie. Not sure if I should be sorry for Jana, because, once again, she's left out of the Bestie Sister Wonder Twin Duo, or happy that she didn't get the Extra Appendage Known as Jinger.

 

I'm really rethinking Jana now. She's either dull as dishwater or introverted to the point of being anti-social. I've rethought Jinger for years - she isn't the rebel who needs freed, she's a big Kool-Aid Gulper who still expresses herself like a 12 year old. Run Joy, run away with Josiah, or even Cousin Amy, before they suck the personality out of you, too.

[Readalot]

A quick note - I Just saw the new title and it's perfect! Kudos to the whoever thought of it. Wouldn't it be great if Spurgy wrote his own book when he becomes of age?

[Churchhoney]

Dang, Jinger is co-dependent. Sorry Joy-Anna. Glad you're allowed at the Big Girls' table now, but sorry you now have a permanent leech, well at least until one of you is married off. I guess Jill isn't the only one who can't function without a 24/7 bestie. Not sure if I should be sorry for Jana, because, once again, she's left out of the Bestie Sister Wonder Twin Duo, or happy that she didn't get the Extra Appendage Known as Jinger.

 

I'm really rethinking Jana now. She's either dull as dishwater or introverted to the point of being anti-social. I've rethought Jinger for years - she isn't the rebel who needs freed, she's a big Kool-Aid Gulper who still expresses herself like a 12 year old. Run Joy, run away with Josiah, or even Cousin Amy, before they suck the personality out of you, too.

 

The thing is, when you're born into a family where being together all the time is the rule, this is what you do. It's something that happens way before and below thought to be joined at the hip with somebody. The JInger/Jill Extra Appendage behavior (great coinage, by the way) is exactly what happened in my family. It was just what came naturally because of the programming.

 

 

 

Some people people do hate it, though, even though they do it like everyone else, and I wonder whether Jessa wasn't one such, since she seems to have pulled so much away from the one-on-ones with Jinger now and is not looking back. ...Notice that she and Bin are pretty much joined at the hip now, though. So it's still her pattern. They're almost as joined as Jill and Derick, I think. Heck, Ben didn't want to work or go to school during Jessa's pregnancy, and she seemed to approve of that. And I would bet Jessa's nearly as much teh driver of their joined-at-the-hipness as Ben. (Although I expect that when her honeymoon feelings end she'll be very disgruntled if he still wants the togetherness, since I do suspect that togetherness isn't her nature, just her lifelong habit....)

 

I do think there's another possibility for Jana besides the two clear possibilities you mention. Introverts often are among those who hate the joined-at-the-hip stuff, in my experience. So I think it's possible that Jana's another one who hates it. On that scenario, she generally goes along with it, behavior-wise, to avoid rocking the boat, but she doesn't seek it out and she's conscious of her dislike of it but keeps that to herself because not keeping it to herself would cause her trouble. An introvert shoved into an you-must-always-be-together situation may well act antisocial without being antisocial -- since you'd like being around some people if you weren't required to have them tied to you all the time. (in other words, the rather antisocial can come out looking and feeling utterly radically antisocial in one of these force-togetherness situations) Jana kind of reminds me of myself, and that's what I did. It makes you seem dull as dishwater, but there is something going on underneath. (in my case, plans to leave -- in Jana's, maybe just seething annoyance tinged with guilt?).... Of course, she's a Duggar, so the "no, she's just dull as dishwater" may apply. 

Edited December 2, 2015 by Churchhoney

[Oldernowiser]

As the introvert's introvert, I can't imagine how horribly uncomfortable I would be growing up in that chaos. Between the clingy little "buddies," the constant forced marches in public, the lockdown dorm sleeping arrangements...there is no place or time to be alone.

Oh, wait, there's always the prayer closet...

[Churchhoney]

As the introvert's introvert, I can't imagine how horribly uncomfortable I would be growing up in that chaos. Between the clingy little "buddies," the constant forced marches in public, the lockdown dorm sleeping arrangements...there is no place or time to be alone.

Oh, wait, there's always the prayer closet...

 

You'd probably be furious all the time, without actually knowing what you were furious about, and your base-level anxiety would be sky high. That's how I was. Just constantly on edge, and that was in a home with way fewer people than the Duggar house. Not only is there no place or time to be alone, but the non-aloneness involves being watched constantly, too. And that'll drive anybody crazy -- even an extrovert.

[Temperance]

Dang, Jinger is co-dependent. Sorry Joy-Anna. Glad you're allowed at the Big Girls' table now, but sorry you now have a permanent leech, well at least until one of you is married off. I guess Jill isn't the only one who can't function without a 24/7 bestie. Not sure if I should be sorry for Jana, because, once again, she's left out of the Bestie Sister Wonder Twin Duo, or happy that she didn't get the Extra Appendage Known as Jinger.

 

I'm really rethinking Jana now. She's either dull as dishwater or introverted to the point of being anti-social. I've rethought Jinger for years - she isn't the rebel who needs freed, she's a big Kool-Aid Gulper who still expresses herself like a 12 year old. Run Joy, run away with Josiah, or even Cousin Amy, before they suck the personality out of you, too.

I think it doesn't matter who runs away; anyone who runs away is a rebel and a brave soul.  Jana always seemed to get along with Anna. Jill was too into following the rules, and Jessa too full of herself for Jana. I've seen Jana seeming to bond with her other sisters now. Keep in mind Gothard had a lot of weird rules involving friends. All the kids were supposed to be equally good friends and all  the outside family friends were supposed to be the whole family's friends. 

 

I think Jinger, as people have possibly suggested, has been cast aside by Jessa. Feeling hurt and rejected she posted a picture of herself with Joy. It's like getting dumped by your boyfriend and having your friends post pictures of you and your new boyfriend so your ex can see you moved on with someone amazing, and are happy now. That being said I'm not sure Jessa cares. 

Edited December 2, 2015 by Temperance

[kokapetl]

Even Amy won't cut ties. It says a lot.

[queenanne]

You'd probably be furious all the time, without actually knowing what you were furious about, and your base-level anxiety would be sky high. That's how I was. Just constantly on edge, and that was in a home with way fewer people than the Duggar house. Not only is there no place or time to be alone, but the non-aloneness involves being watched constantly, too. And that'll drive anybody crazy -- even an extrovert.

 

Agreed, I waged a constant - well, not literally, but like a dog to its vomit, did we return over and over  - push-back about having my room door locked, with multiple avowals and empty threats to take the door off the hinges instead, my parents would be unglued simply because it was locked and I had to go unlock it, even though I did so at all times within 30 seconds or fewer.  Privacy is a dirty word, probably because it involves the suspicion that somebody somewhere is, ahem, pleasuring themselves (and I'd almost rather hope that's the reason, because at least that's a clear reason you can imagine someone having a clear through-line to in their thoughts).  Ideas that privacy is a dirty word simply because it's a dirty state of being, linked to nothing in particular, is too ugly to contemplate and makes no sense.  Even the Bible is OK with, nay encourages, private devotionals and meditation.  Objections, seem to be waged by the authoritarian control freaks.  Either that or they think the only way to behave, is as Christ with the apostles, camping all over together and living basically in each other's faces 24/7.

 

And I still loathe anybody standing behind me, hovering around me, any scenario where I'm not turned around looking right at your face, because it's worse to suspect-wonder whether or not someone is looking at you, than to actually find out.  And of course, turning around to assess constantly, makes others treat you like the freak.

Edited December 3, 2015 by queenanne

[Churchhoney]

And I still loathe anybody standing behind me, hovering around me, any scenario where I'm not turned around looking right at your face, because it's worse to suspect-wonder whether or not someone is looking at you, than to actually find out.  And of course, turning around to assess constantly, makes others treat you like the freak.

 

Oh, wow. Me, too. And if I am involved in something that distracts me from my usually constant reconnaissance, I jump a mile if I suddenly detect someone too close behind me. ... On the bright side, at work I'm considered admirably observant! I notice stuff on the edges of vision that nobody else sees. And this can have its benefits.

 

I often wonder what such disturbed traits the Duggar kids exhibit. Can't believe that they don't have a ton, since they truly live in crazyville.

Edited December 3, 2015 by Churchhoney

[GeeGolly]

Oh, wow. Me, too. And if I am involved in something that distracts me from my usually constant reconnaissance, I jump a mile if I suddenly detect someone too close behind me. ... On the bright side, at work I'm considered admirably observant! I notice stuff on the edges of vision that nobody else sees. And this can have its benefits.

 

I often wonder what such disturbed traits the Duggar kids exhibit. Can't believe that they don't have a ton, since they truly live in crazyville.

Silence is probably painfully deafening for them.

[Barb23]

 I think Jinger, as people have possibly suggested, has been cast aside by Jessa. Feeling hurt and rejected she posted a picture of herself with Joy. It's like getting dumped by your boyfriend and having your friends post pictures of you and your new boyfriend so your ex can see you moved on with someone amazing, and are happy now. That being said I'm not sure Jessa cares.

I'm not sure Jessa could even figure that out.

[Churchhoney]

Silence is probably painfully deafening for them.

 

No kidding. And they probably feel quite uncomfortable in any space that doesn't have echoes coming from several directions. In videos, at least, the house sounds like some sort of canyon with a middle school field trip going through it. And given that it's basically an auditorium, I think that's probably an accurate impression.

Edited December 3, 2015 by Churchhoney

[frenchtoast]

Topic please. Discussion of how the family lives can go into the Duggars and Their World topic. Thanks!

[frenchtoast]

Folks, some posts have been hidden following the mod note JUST ABOVE about staying on topic. This is not about the family, JB, Michelle etc. This topic is the Jessa, Ben and Spurgeon topic. Posts will be deleted and repeat offenders may need be to warned which seems so ridiculous. Stay on topic.

[louannems]

https://www.instagram.com/p/-2Ujmdjfnv/

https://www.instagram.com/p/-2tT71jfgm/

Picture of little Spurgeon and various Duggar's from Jessa's Instagram

[WhineandCheez]

Why must every single one of these kids saw away on a violin?  Isn't there a choice of instruments to play?  I can understand a parent mandating you must learn an instrument, but why violins?  Does Aldi carry violins??

[lookeyloo]

We are moving to a place with an Aldi around corner so I will check out the violin section and report back!!!!