S04.E04: Happily Never After

[bblancobrnx]

Joe, thank you for pointing out Scheana's terrible vampire nails in your episode recap. I meant to fingernail-shame her but I had forgotten. They look absolutely ridiculous and makes her hands look like monster hands. Boooooo Scheana. Booooooooo

ETA - this is not in style is it? Please tell me it isn't

Edited November 24, 2015 by bblancobrnx

[FozzyBear]

What if Shay weren't an addict but developed a health issue and a doctor ordered him not to drink? A kidney problem, or something. Is Scheana going to dump him because of her lifestyle? I shouldn't let this dumb show bother me, but it is.

I think that's a different situation she would likely react differently too. To be fair to Sheena, I don't have even an inch of save-a-hoe (or I guess it would be save-a-bro in my case) in me. I will not play sober coach and I will not pretend my life is different than it is. I will support any decision someone makes, but I'm not going to take their hand and make them make it. And I will not pretend I caused someone's shit. If you need a mommy/counselor/babysitter/life coach than move on to another girl because even when I try, I suck at it.

To be fair to Shay, I laughed out loud during the entire pee in a cup conversation. I'm with Jax (and now I want a shower), that marriage is not built to last.

As for their apartments, I don't think that the actual places are that bad. It is West LA. They're all probably paying at least $2 grand a month. It's just that Kristen is the only one wha can decorate to save her life. Which is odd since Kristen herself always looks sort of disheveled. Everyone else just has ugly couches pushed up against the wall like a frat house. Really strange.

[Ubiquitous]

This is probably an unpopular opinion but my lord this show needs more Stassi. So much more Stassi. I don't tune in to this shit to watch Scheana MF Shay cry for an hour.

Gawd help me, but I agree! Of course, as soon as she does show up, she'll be the reason things aren't interesting.

 

Scheana (whatever, spelling) is drug-testing her grown ass husband.

I just can't even.

Yeah, Shay won't start to resent Schena's home drug testing at all.

 

ETA: pure speculation, but it wouldn't surprise me if Mike went to detox and lied about being with his parents. I think he might actually be hiding going to NA because it doesn't fit Scheana's narrative. The more I think about it, the more I think that intervention was for Scheana so he'd be able to speak. Generally addicts don't schedule their own interventions.

Interesting point! That would explain Shay going 'ground for ten days and being off the grid, so to speak.

 

Ariana's face when Tom mentioned marriage- priceless.

I got the sense Pandora was referring to Schwartz's Panic at Pump episode when she mentioned no crying, running away, etc.

I thought that reaction shot of Ariana was to Tom saying he wants to have children with her.

 

Pandora was totally referring to Schwartie's Panic at Pump moment It made me laugh, but it seemed kinda bitchy to me. What exactly were the Tom's proposing, anyway? Promoting the sangria sold at business tycoon Lisa Vanderpump's bars/restaurants in Saint Lois, or was it their idea to apply the Vanderbucks name to an existing sangria they make at their house parties?

 

I just don't buy that that is really Kristen's apartment. I think production rented it for her on some kind of a corporate deal. Fully furnished. Compliments of Ikea. She was probably living out of her car or shacking up at a friends place and needed a place to film. She has no job. She can't afford a place that is as nice as that apt. The other chucklefucks are all working and they can't even afford a decent place to live.

Kristen being jobless didn't occur to me until you mentioned it. I figured it was nice b/c she's neurotic about cleaning things.

[ghoulina]

What exactly were the Tom's proposing, anyway? Promoting the sangria sold at business tycoon Lisa Vanderpump's bars/restaurants in Saint Lois, or was it their idea to apply the Vanderbucks name to an existing sangria they make at their house parties?

 

I believe Lisa already has her own sangria line. I think that the Toms were getting at was that they could go to various clubs and try and promote her brand? Apparently mainly in St Louis, because Sandoval is a very important person there.

[Ubiquitous]

If you were looking for step-by-step instructions for how not to help a friend with a drug problem, Scheana and her pals are here for you.

http://previously.tv/vanderpump-rules/vanderpump-rules-puts-the-shun-in-intervention/"> Read the story

When I think of bad interventions, I think of this one:

[pbutler111]

What's up with Pandora acting like a sitcom star trying to hide a real-life pregnancy not shared by her character? Is she actually pregnant and keeping it under wraps for some reason? She does look like she's gained a lot of weight, and she was really working that oversize purse to cover up her mid-section.

[OnceSane]

*shrugs* Eh, I still like Scheana. Is she narcissistic? Yes. Clueless? Most definitely. But no one is responsible for Shay's addiction problems but himself. And she can't force him to stay clean no matter how many times she drug tests him. I'm glad he's standing up for himself more, but I'm not gonna blame Scheana for Shay's choices. I do hope we see her getting more information (from someone credible) about living life as the loved one of an addict. If she did/does that, I can easily forgive her initial "me me me" reaction.

Ariana's face at the idea of kids made me laugh.

And I expect James and Kristen to get into a legit fistfight by the end of the season.

[FozzyBear]

I had a guy slut shame me for sleeping with people he knew before we were dating, just like Kristen and James. Never mind that we had run in the same circle for years and he had slept with some of my girlfriends too, I had to be forgiven for having an adult sex life with someone he knew a year before we started dating. Never again will I put up with that bullshit. That was when I learned to silently ask myself if I had done anything I would be ashamed of if someone wasn't yelling at me and if the answer is no then to just walk away.

[KungFuBunny]

The best plan for VPR Sangria - would be for the VPR clan to go to various clubs - Vegas and other major cities promoting her liquors.

The cast members would sort of be like the Jersey Shore kids that can make cake by making an appearance at said club and glasses or bottles of sangria can be sold at the event so that Lisa can make her cut.

I'm renaming Schwartzie - Peter PansyAssed

Lisa was absolutely right - it's ridiculous to hire Shay to work at Pump surrounded by alcohol.

 

I kind of have a feeling this has been in works for a while and this was a way for them to pump it on the show.

Scheana probably is in a panic because she won't make any money if she is left behind with trying to keep my huzban sober.

 

There is not one piece of Shay's personality in that girly princess apartment.

I don't get why he married or dated Scheana - they dated and lived together for years before getting married - if he felt intimidated then why marry her? oh wait he had easy access to booze and drugs probably.

 

Every time I see Hanky the Swan - I hear Scheana's voice coming out.

 

As for James and Kristen - I wonder if they had already broken up after Scheana's wedding but stayed together so that both could come back for another season on VPR. When James mentioned anger at Kristen for having sex with Jax and Tom - I think he purposefully left out the guys she really was banging.

 

Wait so Muppy's DJ station is at the entry of the restaurant by the hostess station? That makes sense....LOL

 

Jax found a girl dumber than himself - wow I can see this relationship lasting

[ghoulina]

There is not one piece of Shay's personality in that girly princess apartment.

I don't get why he married or dated Scheana - they dated and lived together for years before getting married - if he felt intimidated then why marry her? oh wait he had easy access to booze and drugs probably.

 

I think it's possible to love someone and feel intimidated by them at the same time. For whatever reason, Shay does seem to truly love Scheana. The way he clung to her and cried when he came back felt very genuine to me. But I also think he is probably a very insecure person and it might not have ever occurred to him that he deserves better - that doesn't even mean leaving her, just insisting she treat him better. 

[bosawks]

I had VPR Sangria once but a little amoxicillin cleared it right up.

[Ubiquitous]

What's up with Pandora acting like a sitcom star trying to hide a real-life pregnancy not shared by her character? Is she actually pregnant and keeping it under wraps for some reason? She does look like she's gained a lot of weight, and she was really working that oversize purse to cover up her mid-section.

All I'm saying is don't ask a woman if she is pregnant if you aren't 100% sure you already know the answer. :-)

Apparently I wasn't paying attention to Kristen and DJ Muppet Baby's faux couples therapy session b/c I thought (or assumed) he said he was angry about Kristen spending all her time screwing/fucking around with Tom and Jax's relationships to the detriment of theirs: snooping, stalking, contacting Miami Girl, etc.

Speaking of DJ Muppet Baby, why the hell is he DJing at (or what seems to be intended to be) a fancy formal restaurant?

[BogoGog24]

If Scheana is clueless/dumb for thinking Shay should be able to "drink just enough for a buzz," then Tom Sandoval is equally clueless and dumb for asking Lisa to give him a job at a bar. At any rate, one of them (might have been Tom Sandy) asked Shay if he had withdrawal symptoms when he wasn't taking pills and he said yes, so clearly he has an addiction issue, not just that he's covering something up. And even if Scheana's initial reaction was all "I was so upset without you for a whole week!", "I can't be with someone sober!," me me me, I think at the end she came around and was blathering on about if she was talking too much that he could step in and tell her to shut up once in a while, to which all the others were like "You mean like you're doing right now?" I think it's something she's going to have to adjust to, if all these years they've been together, she was the one taking over the conversation and doing all the talking, it will be an adjustment for both of them for her to talk less and listen more and for him to talk more. Hopefully by now things are better between them and with Shay's addiction.

[straightshooter]

Stupid and narcissistic are a very dangerous combination.  If ol' Wife of the Year can't be with someone who is sober, she's going to need either a hell of a life insurance policy on her hubby or divorce papers.  What a selfish bitch.  

[WhosThatGirl]

I wouldn't want to trade my whole life either, don't get me wrong. I think that if someone has a real problem and gets real help, they should be able to be around others drinking, as some  addicts can do that. With Schena though- and probably due in no small part to this show both she and Shay are on- there is a PARTY every other day. Obviously that isn't a great environment to be sober in.

 

I also agree, that while this isn't Schena's responsibility on her own, Shay should get help that he needs and it isn't her fault per say, I still come back to what I asked earlier: How was she not aware of this as a problem? They were together for a long time and yet she was all of a sudden surprised by this or was she hiding it until there needed to be some sort of a story for her now that the wedding had happened. I just.. I have a lot of questions. I don't want to dismiss this as not being a real problem for Shay but I never know anymore on these reality shows. Stuff is sort of real but there's an filter over it.  I hate it when these mindless shows make me think too much. WHY ARE YOU BEING REAL LIFE NOW, VANDERPUMP RULES? WHY?

[TattleTeeny]

Call me a shallow monster, but for all the talk of Britney's (Brittany's?) beauty, I was seriously underwhelmed and that's being kind. Sorry, but oof.

[Silo]

You LET them. (your words) Why?

By "let them", I mean you stay with them anyway. People stay for different reasons; they're too naive to know better, they love the other person and hope they will change, they think on some level they deserve to be treated like that.

Edited November 25, 2015 by Silo

[LibertarianSlut]

When Pandora referenced Tom's panic attack I yelled at the tv! What a smug little witch!

Yeah, this is a perfect description of her. It not that she didn't have a point--she did--but why even take a meeting with someone like that when your business is going to be as big as she made it sound like it was going to be? Answer: she probably has no plans to work with Tom, but she needed them there to pimp her product and gloat about it.

Once again, Pandora kept her giant purse in front of her belly during taping.

Preach! She is not pregnant, has never been pregnant (that I know of), but she's always got that giant purse wedged between her midsection and the camera. I think Pandy is well aware of the other girls being featured on this show--Scheana, Katie, Kristen, Faith, Brittani, Lala, Ariana, and Stassi. She sees the calendar shoots they do each year, and I think she's aware of the premium that is put on prettiness and thinness in the culture that her mother made a killing from. I don't know if it bothers her, but Pandora does not have the body or looks these other girls have. All the money and shiny bouncing blonde hair in the world won't change that. This is one of those unfortunate cases of the mother being prettier than the daughter. Todd's son from a prior marriage is a very good-looking man. I have a feeling there were a lot of expectations for Pandora's looks as she was growing up. But genetically, it just didn't pan out.

She's so elitist and cold that I don't feel sorry for her. Every time she works with someone from her mom's business, starting with Stassi and now the latest with Tom, she never fails to put them down and cause them to feel inferior. She lords the fact that she's in a power position over them, even though she did not get where she is through virtue; she got there because of who her parents are. She's lucky she landed that Prince William doppelgänger. I don't think he's going anywhere. That marriage is like American royalty.

Edited cause Prince William ain't Prince Charles

Edited November 25, 2015 by N. Bluth

[Jextella]

Tom & Tom are a hoot this season.  I like to see them slowing transitioning to adulthood.  Finally! Right?!

[Granimal]

Being the husband/wife of an addict is extremely hard, to put it mildly. I'm ashamed to admit, that I too (in the past) considered checking my partner's urine. I did not actually do it, but you get desperate. With all the lies and deflection, it really does feel like you're being cheated on. You feel like you have to have the strength to carry and take care of two people, and its exhausting.

 

I shouldn't be commenting because I haven't seen the episode. However, from what I hear/ saw earlier posters are right, it's the Scheana show. And telling Shay to drink at parties? As if that's the main thing to focus on right now!

 

I tend towards self-absorption, but not to the extent that Scheana does (I hope). Wow. When VR hits too close to home...

I am glad they're showing Shay's story (sort of), because most non-addicts don't understand that there are functional addicts. You can be at the top of your career, pay your bills, clean your house, but you need pills to do it. Not all addicts are of the Kim variety, in fact many that I know (through work) are highly educated, functional, and over-achievers. They just need pills to do it.

Edited November 25, 2015 by Granimal

[Spiderella2]

Regarding the Sangria line, it's been around for a couple of years and doing very well. Actually most of its leading sales are abroad, especially in the UK. Lisa mentioned it during an interview on WWHL that Pandora and her husband manage the business and it's been profitable. I love sangria so I did buy some when I was in LA, it's fairly pricey but I hate to admit...it's pretty decent. Good choice going with Sangria, there is less competition in that field and she can serve it in her restaurants for even a higher profit margin.

We have come to expect a Real Housewives business enterprise automatically fail, because they are often vacuous idiots who know nothing about the business they embark upon. Of course, there are a few interesting exceptions...Bethanny's Skinny Girl cocktail line, Teresa's cooking books, and Nene's QVC fashions for big girls. Hopefully the sangria will continue to do well, because living in Beverly Hills is not cheap.

I do think the Tom2 interview was a plug, but that just shows that they (Pandy & Jason) are good at marketing, using VPR as another sales vehicle for the business. Smart move.

[Shelby]

This show deosn't need Stassi back. Glad she's gone.

They need to find a way to get Kristen back to working at SUR again, where she can interact with everyone on a regular basis. Especially once Lala starts dating James.

Having Scheana as the lead will be the kiss of death for this show.

I felt sad for Kristen when Tom S. Gave James a big hug upon greeting him. Everyone really has been forgiven and is back in the group, except for Kristen.

[Rebecca]

I find it hard to believe that Shay's addiction has been all that hard on Scheana...because she didn't even notice for, apparently, years! Sure, i would assume it's hard to hear that this has been going on without her knowing but, only as far as it's all about herself and her own ego. She couldn't have made that more clear. She said she thought she had a fairy tale. I wonder how much of her wishes she never found out and they could just continue on in delusion. She seemed to want to down play what he said about how many pills he'd been taking regularly.

I personally definitely don't think Scheana is niave about drugs...no way with the area and crowds she runs in. I wouldn't be surprised if she's popped some pills herself. At least back in the day. I'd assume they all probably have dabbled in drugs, just not to the extent of addiction for most of them. I'd say a number of the have definite alcohol issues.

Edited November 25, 2015 by Rebecca

[bblancobrnx]

I find it hard to believe that Shay's addiction has been all that hard on Scheana...because she didn't even notice for, apparently, years! Sure, i would assume it's hard to hear that this has been going on without her knowing but, only as far as it's all about herself and her own ego. She couldn't have made that more clear. She said she thought she had a fairy tale. I wonder how much of her wishes she never found out and they could just continue on in delusion. She seemed to want to down play what he said about how many pills he'd been taking regularly.

I personally definitely don't think Scheana is niave about drugs...no way with the area and crowds she runs in. I wouldn't be surprised if she's popped some pills herself. At least back in the day. I'd assume they all probably have dabbled in drugs, just not to the extent of addiction for most of them. I'd say a number of the have definite alcohol issues.

It is VERY EASY for a functioning addict to hide a pill addiction from people around them. Very easy. The signs of being high on opiate pills are subtle unless the person is totally lambasted and passes out in front of you at every event. If you haven't been around a functioning addict before, you would never be able to tell. Mostly their attitude might change over time, but if that person has been using since you knew them, you would have no way to know Edited November 25, 2015 by bblancobrnx

[SuzWhat]

If the giant mis-placed photos (trademark rustyspigot) didn't cause me to become an alcoholic, Scheana's giant gold ring would. --Shay

[Duke2801]

This show deosn't need Stassi back. Glad she's gone.

 

 

Oh I could not agree more.  I'd rather Gordo or Lisa's sick swan be made a cast member before Stassi.  A "guest spot" once or twice a season is ok, but other than that?  Bitch needs to stay gone. 

 

Regarding the Sangria line, it's been around for a couple of years and doing very well. Actually most of its leading sales are abroad, especially in the UK. Lisa mentioned it during an interview on WWHL that Pandora and her husband manage the business and it's been profitable. I love sangria so I did buy some when I was in LA, it's fairly pricey but I hate to admit...it's pretty decent. Good choice going with Sangria, there is less competition in that field and she can serve it in her restaurants for even a higher profit margin.

 

 

Thanks for the scoop. I had forgotten about that scene from RHoBH last season where Lisa and Pandy were in a Total Beverage (or something similar) and they were talking about Max finding/meeting his biological parents.  Pretty sure the reason they were there had to do with the sangria.   

[Jextella]

"I didn't know I married an addict"

"I've been taking pills since I met all of you"

 

Shay is a stranger to all involved.  I'd be surprised if any of the relationships he's in that we see on the show last at all.

[TattleTeeny]

These folks are not classy.  Kristen's apt looks the best because it's probably the most recently paid for with Bravo $$.  Still, you're 34, I'll be hard pressed to accept your shithole as "normal".

 

I am not an ass like these people are, and have had a decent paycheck for years and years. Still, I wasn't able to afford anything better than Ikea until I was at the end of my 30s; in fact, I still have quite a bit now because it's nice to look at and serves my purposes. I like it and I am "hard-pressed" to call my furniture, previous apartments, or life in general a "shithole." But maybe I am not classy...not that being a bastion of class is a goal I have in mind; I'm just glad that I don't judge perfectly normal, acceptable apartments and furnishings so harshly, as it would have sucked to live in a so-called shithole from age 18 until I was able to buy a place three years ago in my 40s.

Edited November 25, 2015 by TattleTeeny

[psychoticstate]

I wouldn't want to trade my whole life either, don't get me wrong. I think that if someone has a real problem and gets real help, they should be able to be around others drinking, as some  addicts can do that. With Schena though- and probably due in no small part to this show both she and Shay are on- there is a PARTY every other day. Obviously that isn't a great environment to be sober in.

 

 

I think the main problem is that Scheana doesn't realize that addiction is addiction.  I think she believes that because Shay has had a problem with pills, he's okay to be around alcohol.  Since he's indicated that he turned to pills in order to deal with depression and stress, I'd be worried that he would simply trade one addiction for another.

 

 

 

This show deosn't need Stassi back. Glad she's gone.

They need to find a way to get Kristen back to working at SUR again, where she can interact with everyone on a regular basis. Especially once Lala starts dating James.

Having Scheana as the lead will be the kiss of death for this show.

I felt sad for Kristen when Tom S. Gave James a big hug upon greeting him. Everyone really has been forgiven and is back in the group, except for Kristen.

I agree.  I don't care to see StASSi come back.

 

Oh I could not agree more.  I'd rather Gordo or Lisa's sick swan be made a cast member before Stassi.  A "guest spot" once or twice a season is ok, but other than that?  Bitch needs to stay gone. 

 

 

Thanks for the scoop. I had forgotten about that scene from RHoBH last season where Lisa and Pandy were in a Total Beverage (or something similar) and they were talking about Max finding/meeting his biological parents.  Pretty sure the reason they were there had to do with the sangria.   

Gordo needs to be the Giggy of this show.

[tvfanatic13]

Lord help me, but I actually think Kristen looked really good in this episode. I like her hair longer. I also liked the dinner for 6- seemed like everyone really enjoyed each other's company. And I felt bad for Shay- unless we later learn that this is a fake storyline ala Vicki and Brooks.

[Duke2801]

psychoticstate, on 25 Nov 2015 - 12:21 PM, said:

I think the main problem is that Scheana doesn't realize that addiction is addiction.  I think she believes that because Shay has had a problem with pills, he's okay to be around alcohol.  Since he's indicated that he turned to pills in order to deal with depression and stress, I'd be worried that he would simply trade one addiction for another.

 

 

 

I agree.  I don't care to see StASSi come back.

 

Gordo needs to be the Giggy of this show.

 

Yesssss.  Gordo > Giggy

[ghoulina]

I think the main problem is that Scheana doesn't realize that addiction is addiction.  I think she believes that because Shay has had a problem with pills, he's okay to be around alcohol.  Since he's indicated that he turned to pills in order to deal with depression and stress, I'd be worried that he would simply trade one addiction for another.

 

Well, they both talked about him drinking way too much as well. So she must be aware that he has been abusing alcohol, and to suggest he just have a few drinks when they're out is so ridiculous, IMO.

 

 

I agree with everyone about Gordo. Gordo has life! Gordo has spunk! Gordo has personality! Giggy looks like he's dead half the time. (And I would probably die too if I were forced into those asinine outfits on the regular.)

[ivygirl]

{Pandora is] lucky she landed that Prince William doppelgänger. I don't think he's going anywhere. That marriage is like American royalty.

Edited cause Prince William ain't Prince Charles

Ha! I thought the same thing (about her husband looking like Prince William... but first having the name "Charles" come to mind)!

Edited November 25, 2015 by ivygirl

[KnoxForPres]

I am not an ass like these people are, and have had a decent paycheck for years and years. Still, I wasn't able to afford anything better than Ikea until I was at the end of my 30s; in fact, I still have quite a bit now because it's nice to look at and serves my purposes. I like it and I am "hard-pressed" to call my furniture, previous apartments, or life in general a "shithole." But maybe I am not classy...not that being a bastion of class is a goal I have in mind; I'm just glad that I don't judge perfectly normal, acceptable apartments and furnishings so harshly, as it would have sucked to live in a so-called shithole from age 18 until I was able to buy a place three years ago in my 40s.

Yeah- agree completely. And that's one thing that rings true to me on VPR- they aren't all ocean front Malibu facing, thank God.

During the intervention I found:

the hug legit. Seemed they do care.

I was kind of annoyed by the Tom's what- holy shit you've had five in one day and had side effects? Give me a fucking break. As said above- we could all maintain that life.

Was distracted by Ariana's olive onesie? Or what was that unflattering piece of fabric?

Main focus was on the 42 ft wedding pics

Hate it- but we could go back many seasons with me saying on these sites ! this and I stand by it- I love Schwartz.

I'm really glad Peter found a nice girl who he wants to take out.

FI Toms love for Ariana made me kind of sad. Like she was slurping spaghetti giving him the fuck eye and his response "I have to be so great she will want to marry me".

Oh dear Flatiron- take a seat by Knox. I too have been that person and you're left sad, lonely, and worst- writing on the wall the whole time.

[ihartcoffee]

Ha! I thought the same thing (about her husband looking like Prince William... but first having the name "Charles" come to mind)!

I've always thought her hubby looks like prince William.

[FozzyBear]

Pandora has always been someone who gives herself way too much credit for her accomplishments. She really does seem responsible and hard working and well educated, which is great and sincerely good for her. But lots of people are all of those things too and don't get rewarded with the lifestyle she has. I don't always feel like she is super aware of that.

[straightshooter]

Having Scheana as the lead will be the kiss of death for this show.

 

I couldn't agree more.  (The same can probably be said for her marriage) 

[The Mighty Peanut]

Scheana did an interview for Access Hollywood (or something like it) about how hurt she was when Eddie Cibrian left her for Leann Rimes. Brandi, who was pregnant at the time, claims this is how she found out Eddie was not just leaving her, but had been cheating on her with multiple mistresses. Who knows if this was actually how she found out, but the Scheana interview did happen and she did know Eddie was married and his wife was pregnant.

I had chocked this up to Scheana being young and Eddie being a player, but now I'm beginning to think the me-me-me attitude is pretty deep and longstanding.

[heatherchandler]

When Pandora referenced Tom's panic attack I yelled at the tv! What a smug little witch!

I fucking hate Pandora. She is absolutely a smug witch.

[heatherchandler]

 

It wasn't the gay guy from the bar. It's Jason, Pandora's husband. 

 

 

To me, she has a point.  And, tbf, you're gonna have to call a lot of us here smug little wenches, too, because his panic attacks get brought up and - and snarked on - quite a bit in these parts.

 

 

Oh, is she pregnant?

Yeah it wasn't the gay guy from the bar, but anyone else think Pandora's husband is gay? He just strikes me as not straight. Also, there is NO WAY IN HELL a straight guy would ever want to be with that disgusting troll Pandora. Maybe he is suffering through the marriage for the ultimate divorce payout. Or maybe he will just stay with her for ever for the lifestyle she affords him.

Whichever way it ends up, that dude is not with her because he loves her. He's good looking, she is downright heinous. Let's be real. He's there for the Vanderbucks.

She brings up the panic attacks to Tom. I'd be like shut the fuck up you smug asshole. Who is she to make fun of him? Like when she admonished the other Tom or whoever last season when they did something she didn't like- she's a pain in the ass.

I know I'm being mean about her looks but this is the place to snark. Does Lisa realize she has a troll for a daughter?

[FanOfTheFans]

I have to say that I hope Shay gets the help he needs. I really like the guy. He seems like such a gentle soul. I think he is just swallowed up in that relationship. Not placing blame on Scheana though for his drug use. But the situation I believe needs some outside help. Maybe a marriage therapist would help too.

James has really turned into a Asshat. Last year he pretty much tolerated Kristin's BS. This year he is all about himself.

[WhosThatGirl]

I would watch a whole show about Gordo. 

[BogoGog24]

I think Pandora has the right to bring up Schwartz's panic attack (which I seriously doubt was a real anxiety attack, but rather that he had no clue what he was doing), since he wants to be in business with her and have serious money on the line. She can't afford to have him or anyone she goes in business with drop out after 30 minutes because they can't handle it. She is rightfully looking for people who can handle the job and stick with it and Schwartz showed himself to be incapable of that at a bar job, let alone a business deal. And beauty is in the eye of the beholder I guess. I don't think she's striking but I'd hardly call her a troll or heinous looking. If she's a troll, then I don't want to know what that means I look like.

Edit: Looked her up in Google images, yeah her teeth are really crooked and sometimes when she smiles in photos it looks jarring. But overall I think she's rather pretty looking.

Edited November 26, 2015 by BogoGog24

[ihartcoffee]

Jumping in to your convo. ... pandy looks like maybe she was a thumb sucker and never got it fixed.

Switching topics, apparently Jax's gf thinks she's applying for a job at a strip club and her resume is her looks and skimpy outfit. She always looks like she forgot her clothes.

I feel sorry for Shay, he messed up marrying that self absorbed twit.

[Ubiquitous]

Gordo needs to be the Giggy of this show.

Initially, I was in a turkey-overdose torpor and misparsed that as "giggity" and I initially wonder why this show neede a Quagmire in it before realizing you meant Lisa Vanderbuck's dog. I thought they had put it to sleep several yesrs ao.

No one has mentioned this yet, but what the heck was the deal with Katie's lame Pout & Pose blog? I don't care enough to look, but I was not impressed by what they showed on the show.

[BogoGog24]

It's probably similar to the Style by Stassi blog or whatever that was.

[LibertarianSlut]

I think Pandora has the right to bring up Schwartz's panic attack (which I seriously doubt was a real anxiety attack, but rather that he had no clue what he was doing), since he wants to be in business with her and have serious money on the line. She can't afford to have him or anyone she goes in business with drop out after 30 minutes because they can't handle it. She is rightfully looking for people who can handle the job and stick with it and Schwartz showed himself to be incapable of that at a bar job, let alone a business deal. And beauty is in the eye of the beholder I guess. I don't think she's striking but I'd hardly call her a troll or heinous looking. If she's a troll, then I don't want to know what that means I look like.

Edit: Looked her up in Google images, yeah her teeth are really crooked and sometimes when she smiles in photos it looks jarring. But overall I think she's rather pretty looking.

 

Are you mean though? Do you mock people while you're in their presence? Do you treat people poorly because they struggle, while you have everything 100% together? Just from the very little I know of you on this board, you are nothing like that. Which means that most people--or, I, at least--would never go after your looks, even if you were Quasimodo. Pandora is in the other category IMO, so I think that is why people think her looks are more fair game. No one talks smack about Lisa's other child, Max's looks, even though he's not, like, handsome. I think it's because, even though he's really had his struggles, he's not obnoxious.

I hadn't even noticed Pandora had crooked teeth; can't that be fixed?? The issues I have with her looks are 1.) her mouth. It just forms into a natural scowl, and 2.) she has a really heavy, low brow line, which pulls down her whole face. I don't think she's a hideous girl. I just don't think she's nearly as pretty as she could have been, judging by what her parents looked like in their youth.

If Tom had the anxiety attack or whatever it was, I asked up thread why Pandora would take the meeting at all, and someone wrote that bringing the sangria onto VPR was good marketing. That is true; it was good marketing. But, was it nice? To bring these somewhat neurotic guys out to Villa Rosa where they are intimidated, have them kiss her ass because they truly need the money, only for Pandora to lecture them and correct them and send them off with no positive feedback whatsoever, and not putting them out of their misery by just telling them it's not going to work, but instead send them away with a homework assignment to make a proposal or something, when she knows they're wasting their time, because she had no wish to work with them?

 

Yeah it wasn't the gay guy from the bar, but anyone else think Pandora's husband is gay? He just strikes me as not straight. Also, there is NO WAY IN HELL a straight guy would ever want to be with that disgusting troll Pandora. Maybe he is suffering through the marriage for the ultimate divorce payout. Or maybe he will just stay with her for ever for the lifestyle she affords him.

Whichever way it ends up, that dude is not with her because he loves her. He's good looking, she is downright heinous. Let's be real. He's there for the Vanderbucks.

She brings up the panic attacks to Tom. I'd be like shut the fuck up you smug asshole. Who is she to make fun of him? Like when she admonished the other Tom or whoever last season when they did something she didn't like- she's a pain in the ass.

I know I'm being mean about her looks but this is the place to snark. Does Lisa realize she has a troll for a daughter?

Pandora's husband actually comes from serious money. That's why I think they're like royalty--they're keeping the monied families together.

I don't like the way she treats people, because of their relative positions of power. If she were just a nobody who worked at SUR and she acted the way she did, I'd probably just roll my eyes. But she is the big boss's daughter. I think this brings with it the extra responsibility to have a bit of diplomacy. She comes to the table with almost all the power, while they are clearly replaceable. If it were me, I'd bend over backward to be kind and nonjudgmental of others.

While I don't quite think Pandora is a troll (but fully respect you getting your snark on), I think Lisa has cognitive dissonance when it comes to this. Part of her loves Pandora so much (and I truly believes she LOVES her daughter), that she is blinded to her potential weak spots. But the business-minded side of her--the one that produces the SUR calendar and would not even think of hiring Shay at Pump (was I the only one who thought that part of that refusal to hire Shay had a little something to do with his bear-like characteristics, and not only because of a reported pill addiction, considering some of the questionable behavior of the attractive people she employs?)--the business side of her knows that there is nothing more marketable or powerful as a young, beautiful woman, and maybe a tiny, tiny part of her wishes her daughter had been that stereotypical California beauty.

PS sorry for the novel. I love football, but the longer it's on, the more I tend to write.

PPS I hope I'm not coming off as a Marxist, like there's a class struggle between Pandora and the others. I'm a total capitalist--just because I'm not rich doesn't mean I don't think people should get their coin on. Just be cool about it.

[Sun-Bun]

I don't agree that Pandora's quite the hideous-looking beast some folks on here would claim she is, but yeah, it's a shame she's as homely as she is with such a gorgeous mom living in such a looks-obsessed glitzy city and working in such an environment.

Her personality appears to be quite dull and sometimes judgey/bitchy though, so that doesn't enhance her looks.

Her teeth have apparently been fixed already and she has nice hair, she just suffers from a naturally thick/big-boned body type and her face definitely looks like someone squished her face down too far---losing some of that chunk, an eyebrow-lift and maybe a chin-shaving plus a nose job would certainly help improve her aesthetically, but then how could she possibly acquire a necessary personality implant?

On the flipside, that poor chick Jax is trying to help get hired at SUR? What a sad case she is...coasting by on her marginally-good looks with barely a professional bone or brain in her body. Who in her right mind would dress like she does for a job interview at a high-end restaurant?! I hope to God she is only dressing like that for exposure/drama-potential...

[bblancobrnx]

Edit: Looked her up in Google images, yeah her teeth are really crooked and sometimes when she smiles in photos it looks jarring. But overall I think she's rather pretty looking.

No, she is not pretty at all. And her attitude makes her just heinous. She is a troll. A disgusting wretch. Which is amazing because I think her mother is a knockout

[ghoulina]

Pretty isn't a fact. As cliche as it sounds, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Personally, I don't find Pandora to be pretty, but I don't think she's all that heinous either. Just like I find Katie to be the prettiest on the show, and others have said they do not find her good looking at all. We're all entitled to our opinions.