S10.E11: Jessa's Wedding

[msblossom]

I think Thorncrown Chapel is beautiful & have checked out their website many times to look at their photos. If they told me I could have had just 10 guests to be married there, then 10 guests it would be. Benessa laughed when they found out it could only accommodate approx 100, so there was no way their wedding could be there. But a parking lot reception is fine though.

Exactly. I don't think Jessa has ever attended anything truly special or meaningful in her life, so maybe she just doesn't know that less is more. Hopefully, as she matures and gets exposed to more she will evaluate and form her own ideas about what she likes. Little things like having a cupboard full of spices that a friend gave her and Ben as a wedding gift that they use to cook with now she seems to treasure as if it were something that never existed before. And for Jessa, it probably didn't! And traveling to Paris and eating at roadside bistros taking in the the smells, sights and sounds must have been an incredible adventure without her parents and all her brothers and sisters. No wonder the photographs of her show her beaming and relaxed.

[BitterApple]

With the Duggars it's not so much the cheapness it's the horrible execution. I get that Fundies don't do big spreads at weddings, but that doesn't mean the food you do put out has to be done carelessly.

As others have said, ice cream and hot dogs in July would have been a fun idea. Ice cream in a parking lot in November is ridiculous. They should have done a warm dessert like an apple crisp or berry cobbler that could have been served with hot chocolate and coffee.

The Seewalds aren't wealthy yet Guinn managed to put on a classy, cohesive rehearsal dinner with a filling meal. The Duggars are either so oblivious or so self-involved that it doesn't even occur to them to care about their guests' comfort.

[Absolom]

 

Thanks. I like this version better. Jessa's dress looked weirdly bunched up in the back during the parking lot reception. Kind of took away from it a bit.

Ah, yes, Jessa's dress was bustled for the reception.  It's a common thing to do.  Buttons or hook and eye arrangements are sewn on the dress so it can be put up instead of having a long train after the ceremony.  It's optional if you want the train out of the way or you can leave the dress down after the ceremony is over.  

[tinderbox]

Thanks. I like this version better. Jessa's dress looked weirdly bunched up in the back during the parking lot reception. Kind of took away from it a bit.

The train of Jessa's dress was bustled during the outdoor reception.

[Bingermin]

Welcome to new poster Binjermin! Now when will Mrs. Robinson show up? teehee

Thanks... Glad to be out of the shadows, the wedding officiant shed light on what a great username should be. In honor of him I'm randomly adding R's to words torday. 

[Evenshorter]

There is a lot of bowling, actually. Among normal Fundies. Remember how good Anna's mom was?

I think Sierra is one of these women who pops them out but doesn't want to raise them. So she takes every opportunity to do anything she can that looks like a job but isn't actually a job, because of course her kids come first.

Sierra gave birth to a little girl after Jill's wedding. She and her husband have 3 boys as well, who look to be about a year apart. And she's pregnant again.

As for the Benjerman pronouncement, it seemed to me that after Jessa said her vows (correctly saying Benjamin) that the officiant then changed it Benjamin as well. So much for saying how he really knew them and loved them as a couple.

[Bingermin]

He did ride a bus with them once or twice. Doesn't that qualify as an old family friend?

[BitterApple]

I'm a Boston girl so I'm totally familiar with the "-a" turned into an "-er" sound, but Jim Shadt's pronounciation was extreme even to my ears. He kept saying "ben-GER-min", it was so odd and distracting. It's not like Benjamin is some rare, exotic name that is unfamiliar to most Americans.

[Bingermin]

His pronunciation of Bengerman has a certain Moe Szyslak quality to it. 

[SunnyBeBe]

I hope they abolish the "running out of the church after the ceremony" tradition.  IMO, it's rude and disrespectful, especially in a church.  I just can't envision Jana doing it.

[Chai]

I don't really understand why they have to invite thousand and thousands of people to their weddings? I read that fundies invite their whole church? I just can't fathom that! No wonder they spent so little time there or hardly any money on food. Most of these people are complete strangers! So, the after party held at the Duggars or Seewalds would most likely be the real reception, right? That's where family and close friends would gather to have something to eat and sit and talk?

 

I think days and days of making sandwiches and having hot coffee with the hot desserts described above would have been much better. With tables and chairs of course! Even round tables with folding chairs would be fine. Whatever happens to the elderly in this group? 

 

So instead of doing it that way, why bother inviting the whole church? I really like the idea of that beautiful church where they were engaged.  Just my own opinion. :-)

[3girlsforus]

With the Duggars it's not so much the cheapness it's the horrible execution. I get that Fundies don't do big spreads at weddings, but that doesn't mean the food you do put out has to be done carelessly.

As others have said, ice cream and hot dogs in July would have been a fun idea. Ice cream in a parking lot in November is ridiculous. They should have done a warm dessert like an apple crisp or berry cobbler that could have been served with hot chocolate and coffee.

The Seewalds aren't wealthy yet Guinn managed to put on a classy, cohesive rehearsal dinner with a filling meal. The Duggars are either so oblivious or so self-involved that it doesn't even occur to them to care about their guests' comfort.

 

I love this idea... apple crisp or cobbler... what a great idea and you could still have ice cream with it. There are very nice ways to do simple. As you say, it's about the execution. 

 

Oh and let's not forget... whatever you choose to feed them.. PLEASE let them sit down somewhere!!

Edited April 2, 2015 by 3girlsforus

[Ilovemylabs]

I loved Jessa's gown, but then I also loved Jill's.  They were very different but both lovely IMO.  I' so over the strapless wedding gown.  These were both modest and lovely.  I don't care how much you like ice cream...ice cream sundaes in November in a parking lot are just a very bad idea. Please remind me why this reception was not held inside. In my church, the wedding ceremony is a part of the liturgy.  You could have a wedding ceremony in the middle of a regular service if you wanted (we have baptisms during the service on a regular basis), although no one has done this that I can remember.  For my wedding the congregation was invited to attend the ceremony if they chose.  The reception was very small and by invitation only.  Some congregants did come. 

 

I do not think Jessa is that pretty...lips way too big and bad skin.  I think Jill and Jana are prettier, Jana with a sweetness in her expression that is just lovely.  And I do think Jill is quite full of herself (no pun intended).  All that being said, if the bride and groom are happy with the wedding, then I suppose that is all that matters.  They did seem very happy.

[SunnyBeBe]

It's my understanding from watching this show from day one, that they do not attend a regular church.  They used to go to this empty rental building, (the girls took casseroles and they also ate lunch they) but then switched to meeting  in a room inside their house.  Unless it's changed, they make their own church service, so I'm not sure who they invited to their weddings. I would assume it's their ATI Convention associates.  I wonder if there would have been such a large invitation list if the family was not on tv.  I suspect the weddings had to be large to help with the ratings.

[Absolom]

 

Please remind me why this reception was not held inside.

The church hall was too small for all the guests - fire regulations.  Instead of renting a ballroom or even putting tents in the parking lot, the Duggars chose to keep it open air.  

 

The Duggars are Baptists and don't have liturgical services as the Catholic church and some other liturgical churches do.  The weddings can be much more free form and as many think lacking dignity.  I do love Jessa's dress.

 

SunnyBeBe, you kind of have it flipped.  First they met in their own house with their family and added a few like-minded close friends.  Then it grew and they moved it to the "airport house."  It outgrew that and they moved to one or more warehouse type locations.  

Edited April 2, 2015 by Absolom

[msblossom]

I kind of like the idea of Ben's best man developing an interest in Jinger. He was articulate and handsome and super buff.

[awaken]

I know Ben is no genius and his adherence to Duggar rules is based in his own beliefs, but so many times during the rehearsal, I felt like "Okay, a couple might kiss at this point." I felt like they legitimately wanted to kiss - not in a giggly, oooh, kissing fashion (see the early days of JoshAnna) - but because it's just natural. at that point in time The lack of any contact feels awkward.

 

You put it well- I thought the same thing.  Same Dill's "first look" session.  it was actually more awkward and obvious that they DIDN'T do a normal kiss or hug then.  Doesn't have to be a sloppy, passionate makeout session, but a normal kiss on the cheek or lips would have been entirely chaste and appropriate.  NOT doing it kind of made them stand there are smile and giggle at each other because it was so obvious that a small token of affection is what would naturally come at that point.

 

The Duggars' wedding receptions are beyond cringeworthy. Who invites hundreds of people to travel hundreds, if not thousands, of miles, and then has the audacity to serve them a cup of ice cream in a parking lot? It's just so cheap and tacky. And they think nothing of it. I'm not wealthy and I don't have a tv show, but I guarantee that if and when my daughter ties the knot, I will make sure everyone is comfortable and no one goes away hungry.

 

From the wedding-planning episode where they met with the church reps and talked about how many would fit in the reception hall, I have thought:  if the # of guests you're having doesn't fit in your venue, 1) Get a new venue or, 2) invite fewer guests.  If you can't afford to feed and seat everyone you've invited, 1) Invite fewer guests.  If the bride has a desire and dream to have her wedding at a certain beautiful location, but it's too small to fit the # expected, 1) invite fewer guests.  It's simple, but it's almost as if they were irretrievably locked into inviting the 1300 or whatever, and having it at that church, and just had to make do with whatever it was, even if that meant standing up in a parking lot in November.  I understand that weddings are prime socializing and mate-finding time for this set, but still, every wedding doesn't HAVE to include every single possible family and their entire extended families.  With the # of kids they have, there will be many more weddings in the future to meet a potential spouse!

 

I think since Benjermin has allergies he might be a little high from Benadryl and Claritin D, which would explain some of his slowness.

 

I noticed Anna was talking this way in this ep, too, really stuffy.  

 

I also cannot imagine the process of going from never being alone or kissing, to going home alone, getting naked, and having sex for the first time. How do you just cross that threshold?

 

I feel the same way.  While I'm a dying breed in this day and age, who supports saving sex until marriage, and having some physical standards in a relationship, I do think it would be very tough to fulfill the assumed expectations (JB's expectations) of physical intimacy all in one day, after having nearly no physical contact or time alone together throughout their entire relationship thus far.  I do hope that many couples take the time to get to know each other, just get used to actually being alone without a chaparone, talking about "what's on their hearts" in private, being in close physical proximity, and let it build to sex when the time is right, instead of feeling like they must go for it that very night.  I think that would actually make a very stressful wedding night and maybe some not so great memories, to go from zero to everything in a matter of hours.  And I feel worse in that situation, for someone like Jill, who never even had the time to let it develop and build into a solid, close physical and emotional connection before all the crazy ups and downs that pregnancy and new parenthood brings.  

 

I'm a Boston girl so I'm totally familiar with the "-a" turned into an "-er" sound, but Jim Shadt's pronounciation was extreme even to my ears. He kept saying "ben-GER-min", it was so odd and distracting. It's not like Benjamin is some rare, exotic name that is unfamiliar to most Americans.

 

Totally (ha ha)- not only is it a run of the mill, typical American name that you hear all the time, but Benjamin is a Biblical name, which I assume the pastor has read about and taught about many times.  When he is reading that Bible passage, does he also say "Binjerman"????  And no one has corrected him in all this time?  

[Wellfleet]

lol!  I also hope Josie wasn't cooking but it could be her jurisdiction by now.  (Who am I kidding.  I don't think that kid will ever have to do a chore.)

 

I'm still not sure that kid will ever be able to DO many chores...

[Wellfleet]

EarlGrayTea no kidding. Heck at our wedding we struggled to feel like we spent enough time with our guests and we had closer to 100-120. There is no way Jessa and Ben got to spend any quality time with all of those guests, especially in their rush to get out of the place (er...parking lot). I wish they'd gotten married where he proposed and just hacked the guest list wayyyy down if that's what they had to do. I think it would've been better for just about everyone.

 

I doubt that Ben & Jessa were all that interested in spending time with their guests, and I have to say I can't really blame them. They probably only actually knew about 10-20% of them. Now of course good manners comes into play too. They invited them, and in many cases were receiving gifts from them, so they should have at least been greeting everyone who attended. But I doubt there was a formal receiving line either. These are the Duggars, the original backyard and barefoot people.

[awaken]

Also, I can't imagine the travel expenses that people must have taken on to attend this wedding.  If you have 10+ kids, or even 5, that cannot be cheap to bring them all to a wedding, even if one uses a second hand RV and doesn't fly.  

[truthtalk2014]

I think that the reason she is such a bad wedding planner, is that she is not a wedding planner.

 

Someone posted up-thread that she told J'chelle that she would be really pleased with how pretty Jordyn-Grace looked in her dress, and it made me wonder if the Duggars hired her to help out with some of the J'slave tasks while they were busy with wedding prep and filming. 

 

 

I wouldn't doubt it.  My question is- why does she have so much time with the brood of children she is building.  Why did she not bring them along to stick their hands in the brownie mixture with the Duggar kids.  I'm sure Josie would have appreciated another pair of sticky dirty hands to help out.

Here you have the bride dressed to the 9s feeding her guests hot dogs in a parking lot in the freezing cold. And I bet a lot of the guests were in frumpers due to the poverty QF lifesyle brings for most. 

 

Oh they should be so lucky to get a hot dog! 

 

Sierra gave birth to a little girl after Jill's wedding. She and her husband have 3 boys as well, who look to be about a year apart. And she's pregnant again.

 

She is a MEchelle wanna be.  Probably uses that loud horrible voice to hand the littles off to anyone that will watch them.

I don't really understand why they have to invite thousand and thousands of people to their weddings? I read that fundies invite their whole church? 

She wants the 1300 gifts!  She already has thousands from her adoring fans.  Gotta get as much as you can 'catch' with this family. 

I have a feeling Guinn was totally embarrassed for her son with this BS of a so called reception.  I know I would be. 

 

Want to save money?  Just don't have an elaborate ceremony.  After it all, it's really you and your spouse after all the ice cream reception is over.  Just go get married in Vegas or Hawaii - just the two- and no worries about kissing in public.  You can tell all your pervy relatives about it later. 

 

EDIT TO SAY- I keep forgetting how annoying it was for Jessa to be barefoot at the rehearsal dinner.  That's so Josie on the countertops.  

Edited April 2, 2015 by truthtalk2014

[GEML]

Again, the 10 people in an RV did not bring an elaborate gift. It would have been something very small, perhaps even homemade. 40 of those families and you have three bowls, some towels, jelly, some cookbooks, a photo album, potholders, two crocheted afghans, and the like but you need to somehow accommodate 400 people, most of whom are 12 and under.

That's how quickly these numbers add up, and how little the gifts do. But the people there wouldn't have cared about being in a parking lot or driving all that way for a short wedding. They knew what it was. They will do something similar when it is their turn.

[funky-rat]

They had more than ice cream.  Pa Seewald's blog has some wedding photos on it taken by his nephew - "a budding photographer" (or something like that), including one shot of the bridesmaids that shows one of his daughters with a rather unfortunate facial expression.  One shows tons of slices of pies of different varieties with someone piping whipped cream on top.  So if nothing else, there was pie.

 

I've been to a few weddings where there was nothing but cake, ice cream (once it was squares wrapped in wax paper), and punch was served, but at least we sat down!  And were inside.  And most, if not all (I can't quite remember) were people of "stricter" religions, so I'm not too terribly surprised.  I'm sure that just like with Jill's wedding, they had some sort of reception at the house for more "inner circle" or "VIP" guests.

 

Most "low budget" weddings here at least offer cold cuts, or a big crock pot full of hamburger bbq, or something along those lines.  Heck, many weddings around here are pot luck.  I grew up Methodist (bring a covered dish!), and pot luck wedding receptions were very common, and sometimes a good way to get new recipes.  I know pot luck is tough for 1000 people, but there are ways it can be done.  Heck, many of the attendees must be used to cooking for large crowds.  One of my favorite receptions was in the parent's backyard, where us kids got to swim, and they roasted an ox.....all week.  So good.  My reception was about 100-125 people.  Our food was somewhat of a gift.  My dad was president of a social organization at the time, so we got the hall for free.  The hall manager - a good family friend - asked us to pay the hall's price for the raw food ingredients, and she prepped set-up the food as our gift.  We had hot and cold things - cold cuts, baked beans, macaroni and cheese (for both me and my Pappy, whom I miss dearly), macaroni and potato salad, veggies and dip - stuff like that.  Everyone complimented us on our food, and it was pretty standard fare for the area where I live.  Fire halls are common places for receptions here, so we're not terribly high-brow sometimes.

 

I know there's a lot of "non love" for Ben.  Honestly, he reminds me very much of my husband (20 years and counting).  He and I were 18 when we met.  We knew within a month or two that we were meant to be together.  We had both dated prior, but it never went anywhere for him, and I had a boyfriend of 3 years, but it turned out he was closeted, so we never got past the "hanging out" stage (looking back, there were loud signals, but I didn't see them).  So he and I were each others first kiss, and 6 or so months later, were each others first....well....you know.  But we had one key difference (other than the courtship crap):  We lived together.  For almost 3 years before we got married.  My parents insisted on it, even though other members of the family weren't down with it.  And it's something we credit with our longevity.  You never truly know someone before you live with them.  We were engaged for one year, while I finished college.

 

But I digress....my husband isn't book smart.  He spent most of his high school years in Vo-Tech, taking only basic general ed classes.  He learned a trade and went off to trade school.  He didn't finish, but that was his mother's fault, and something I won't go into here.  He was raised in an environment where learning, knowledge, and culture were not valued.  I have worked on that over the years - something that Jessa sadly won't be able to do with Ben because she doesn't have it either - but if any of you would have met him at 18, you'd be saying the same thing about him that you say about Ben.  My husband is not articulate most of the time - he often puts his foot in his mouth.  But he tries.  He's loyal, and he's honest, and hard working.  And 20+ years later, I don't have to doubt that he still loves me.  I'd take Ben over Derick any day - especially since it's come out that he's been given an IV of Kool-Aid.

 

I liked that they wrote their own vows, and that he designed her ring.  I liked their modern pastor ("Benjermin" and all).  I liked her non-white dress.  And I LOVED their running off to kiss in private.  There were lots of kiss calls at our reception, and after a bit, we politely mentioned that one or two was ok, but every 10 minutes wasn't, and we felt like we needed to get a room.  And it stopped.  And pretty confident that the whole "Do you like cherries" conversation was on purpose.  I wouldn't put it past them.  I just hope she's not pregnant.  They deserve some "us" time.

 

ETA: I liked Guinn's dress, but not in that color.  It didn't flatter her skin tone and made her look drab.  A nice blue, or purple would have been better.  I didn't care for the side ponytail either, but she still looked better than Michelle.

Edited April 2, 2015 by funky-rat

[truelovekiss]

Yes, the "combined" numbers seemed ridiculous, since many of them would have already been skewed by Josh and Anna's wedding, and with so many boys, there will be much less say.

There's also the chance that one or more of them *gasp* won't marry and the even bigger chance that one or mofe of them might *double gasp* divorce and remarry. There might be 15 Duggar weddings, there might be 19, and there might be 27. I wouldn't wish divorce on anyone, but I'm enjoying imagining Boob's face if he had an Elizabeth Taylor in the family, on his or her 6th husband.

[woodscommaelle]

I thought the pill box/container some of you have mentioned looked like the plastic box I keep my beads in. In regards to the show, it looked to me like a box full of hair stuff:  barettes, ponytail holders, etc. 

[GEML]

One branch of my super religious family? Three children, six divorces. Sounds like a bad American average until you know two married once and one married four times!

Right now, the Duggars are at their pinnacle. The children they know best and raised most closely, who have great financial incentive to keep to their values are in young adulthood. But no family is untouched. There are a lot of children coming up that have no idea, really, what the Duggars stand for or who their real parents are. Let's start there.

Edited April 2, 2015 by GEML

[JoanArc]

Is there an appropriate thread for long term Duggar speculation? I mean, we had a baby pool, why not this?

[Missy Vixen]

I just can't see how even television exposure in Northwest Arkansas is going to add up to being worth the cost of a diamond ring or Allure gown. Especially being that the Duggars main followers are not terribly well off.

And I think TLC learned a lot of valuable lessons with the Gosselins and even early years with the Duggars. Sure, they are the current highest ranking show, but they aren't so high ranking that their advertising is worth huge bucks.

How many gowns did Allure sell as a result of Jessa's gown being plastered all over People magazine? I don't feel the need to copy the Duggars in anything, but I can imagine there were more than a few brides who noted the dress, noted the (reasonable for a bridal gown) price, and marched right to their local bridal shop to at the very least try it on. That dress was free. Why bother showing the exterior of the bridal shop and the name if they didn't donate services as well? The jewelers got a ton of free publicity as well; the leghumpers in that part of the country will be purchasing anything from there so they can say they went to the Duggar family jewelers.

 

If the advertising on 19KAC was not profitable, the show would not be stuffed to the gills with commercials. I have been keeping track of the advertisers this season. Each episode has at least thirty different commercials featuring nationally-known companies as well as a "brought to you by" spotlight on one particular advertiser each week.

[GEML]

I'm not saying the advertising isn't profitable. But the fact that there's so much of it tells you they need to sell a lot for their cash cow. It's a solid program that is enjoying it's best and highest viewership run right now. But that viewship isn't, demographically, the advertiser gold standard when it comes to market share. A lot of elderly people watch the Duggars. They are the least attractive to advertisers, as their brand preferences are set. We don't see this because we see only the social media savvy side of their viewership which skews young. But even there, how many "leghumper" fans, as you call them, can afford the name brand products advertised during commercials or shops like the ones the Duggars are now enjoying? Especially ones clustered in the geographical region of northwest Arkansas?

It just doesn't make huge sense that people are giving them stuff for free simply for exposure. Now, regarding Jessa's dress, it does seem that it was last years' model and is no longer available. So yes, I can see getting a model of a previous year's dress for a discount or even free by the company, because they are trying to push their modesty line. But she likely "shopped" for it at the salon for "free" when the salon had nothing to do with it (likely the company and TLC were involved and the dress was a done deal) and Jessa likely paid for alterations, as their were several mentions by her about not wanting any except the bustle. Things like that.

But that's a lot more complicated than saying everything is comped. Stuff like the house renovations and the honeymoon, for instance.

Edited April 2, 2015 by GEML

[truelovekiss]

Is there an appropriate thread for long term Duggar speculation? I mean, we had a baby pool, why not this?

I love this idea! It's always kind of fun to be able to say "I called it!" And there's a lot of potential courtships and babies coming up, so there's a lot to work with.

[kstar821]

I laughed at James when he said he was glad he didn't have to be in this wedding. That kid is over it as much as Jessa is.

 

 

 

This.  James has always been my #1 favorite Duggar.  I've always said I'd like to rescue that kid and bring him to my house. 

 

Has nobody commented on Me-chelle's voice as they were looking at the table of remembrance (which Guinn did beautifully, BTW)

 

Me-chelle {to Josie}  - "Josie, do you know who that is??"  {17 octaves higher}  "It's Grandpa Duggar!!!"  

 

My yellow lab turned around to see what the heck was making that noise.

 

My 9 year old made me rewind it twice.

[Cherrio]

I wouldn't doubt it.  My question is- why does she have so much time with the brood of children she is building.  Why did she not bring them along to stick their hands in the brownie mixture with the Duggar kids.  I'm sure Josie would have appreciated another pair of sticky dirty hands to help out.

 

Oh they should be so lucky to get a hot dog! 

 

 

She is a MEchelle wanna be.  Probably uses that loud horrible voice to hand the littles off to anyone that will watch them.

She wants the 1300 gifts!  She already has thousands from her adoring fans.  Gotta get as much as you can 'catch' with this family. 

I have a feeling Guinn was totally embarrassed for her son with this BS of a so called reception.  I know I would be. 

 

Want to save money?  Just don't have an elaborate ceremony.  After it all, it's really you and your spouse after all the ice cream reception is over.  Just go get married in Vegas or Hawaii - just the two- and no worries about kissing in public.  You can tell all your pervy relatives about it later. 

 

EDIT TO SAY- I keep forgetting how annoying it was for Jessa to be barefoot at the rehearsal dinner.  That's so Josie on the countertops.  

I would be mortified by a reception like that, but Guinn probably knew about it.    I give her credit for doing the right thing and having a nice dinner.

             Who knows what these morons think, but if I had seen my son zapping toys when they went registry shopping I would of insisted both of them cancel all the gift grubbing.

[Sew Sumi]

Edited because I didn't see that Absolom posted the correct version of Jessa's dress, from Allure's modest line. 

 

LOL because I just got a pop-up ad regarding becoming a wedding planner. Sorry Sierra Jo, Imma putting you out of work! 

Edited April 2, 2015 by Sew Sumi

[EarlGreyTea]

Edited because I didn't see that Absolom posted the correct version of Jessa's dress, from Allure's modest line. 

 

LOL because I just got a pop-up ad regarding becoming a wedding planner. Sorry Sierra Jo, Imma putting you out of work! 

I swear she's putting herself out of work after this performance. Melted ice cream, no heaters, being overly frazzled, etc.? Rookie mistakes. Although it's true she could probably make a decent living just doing Duggar weddings alone, and all of their friends. I wouldn't be surprised if business really is booming. Still. She's no Jennifer Lopez in The Wedding Planner.

[Sew Sumi]

They had more than ice cream.  Pa Seewald's blog has some wedding photos on it taken by his nephew - "a budding photographer" (or something like that), including one shot of the bridesmaids that shows one of his daughters with a rather unfortunate facial expression.  One shows tons of slices of pies of different varieties with someone piping whipped cream on top.  So if nothing else, there was pie.

 

I've been to a few weddings where there was nothing but cake, ice cream (once it was squares wrapped in wax paper), and punch was served, but at least we sat down!  And were inside.  And most, if not all (I can't quite remember) were people of "stricter" religions, so I'm not too terribly surprised.  I'm sure that just like with Jill's wedding, they had some sort of reception at the house for more "inner circle" or "VIP" guests.

 

Most "low budget" weddings here at least offer cold cuts, or a big crock pot full of hamburger bbq, or something along those lines.  Heck, many weddings around here are pot luck.  I grew up Methodist (bring a covered dish!), and pot luck wedding receptions were very common, and sometimes a good way to get new recipes.  I know pot luck is tough for 1000 people, but there are ways it can be done.  Heck, many of the attendees must be used to cooking for large crowds.  One of my favorite receptions was in the parent's backyard, where us kids got to swim, and they roasted an ox.....all week.  So good.  My reception was about 100-125 people.  Our food was somewhat of a gift.  My dad was president of a social organization at the time, so we got the hall for free.  The hall manager - a good family friend - asked us to pay the hall's price for the raw food ingredients, and she prepped set-up the food as our gift.  We had hot and cold things - cold cuts, baked beans, macaroni and cheese (for both me and my Pappy, whom I miss dearly), macaroni and potato salad, veggies and dip - stuff like that.  Everyone complimented us on our food, and it was pretty standard fare for the area where I live.  Fire halls are common places for receptions here, so we're not terribly high-brow sometimes.

 

I know there's a lot of "non love" for Ben.  Honestly, he reminds me very much of my husband (20 years and counting).  He and I were 18 when we met.  We knew within a month or two that we were meant to be together.  We had both dated prior, but it never went anywhere for him, and I had a boyfriend of 3 years, but it turned out he was closeted, so we never got past the "hanging out" stage (looking back, there were loud signals, but I didn't see them).  So he and I were each others first kiss, and 6 or so months later, were each others first....well....you know.  But we had one key difference (other than the courtship crap):  We lived together.  For almost 3 years before we got married.  My parents insisted on it, even though other members of the family weren't down with it.  And it's something we credit with our longevity.  You never truly know someone before you live with them.  We were engaged for one year, while I finished college.

 

But I digress....my husband isn't book smart.  He spent most of his high school years in Vo-Tech, taking only basic general ed classes.  He learned a trade and went off to trade school.  He didn't finish, but that was his mother's fault, and something I won't go into here.  He was raised in an environment where learning, knowledge, and culture were not valued.  I have worked on that over the years - something that Jessa sadly won't be able to do with Ben because she doesn't have it either - but if any of you would have met him at 18, you'd be saying the same thing about him that you say about Ben.  My husband is not articulate most of the time - he often puts his foot in his mouth.  But he tries.  He's loyal, and he's honest, and hard working.  And 20+ years later, I don't have to doubt that he still loves me.  I'd take Ben over Derick any day - especially since it's come out that he's been given an IV of Kool-Aid.

 

I liked that they wrote their own vows, and that he designed her ring.  I liked their modern pastor ("Benjermin" and all).  I liked her non-white dress.  And I LOVED their running off to kiss in private.  There were lots of kiss calls at our reception, and after a bit, we politely mentioned that one or two was ok, but every 10 minutes wasn't, and we felt like we needed to get a room.  And it stopped.  And pretty confident that the whole "Do you like cherries" conversation was on purpose.  I wouldn't put it past them.  I just hope she's not pregnant.  They deserve some "us" time.

 

ETA: I liked Guinn's dress, but not in that color.  It didn't flatter her skin tone and made her look drab.  A nice blue, or purple would have been better.  I didn't care for the side ponytail either, but she still looked better than Michelle.

They didn't write the vows. They admitted that they got them elsewhere (probably online, but they'll never admit it). 

[Seashell Lover]

I just got 2 popups one was unzip and the other was download. I need brain bleach please.

[Chai]

I just got a pop up for SCORE. I wish I could say I was kidding, lol

[msblossom]

I did find it kind of cute that Jessa wanted a photo of herself hugging Ben that copied Michelle's wedding photo 30 years earlier holding the marriage certificate and doing the wink. I laughed.

Out of all the kids, other than Josie, Michelle does seem to have more of a fondness for Jessa. I'm not saying she's been a great mother to her, but I sensed out of all of her kids she is probably closest to Jessa bc she's sees something of herself in her that she doesn't with the others. Narcissistic? Yes, imo. I did see her catch her breath right before the ceremony and tear up a tiny bit, that's as emotional as I've ever seen her get for her any of her grown children.

ETA: I'm not saying Jessa is narcissistic, I'm saying that Michelle is for seeing something of herself in a Jessa and favoring her for it, imo.

Edited April 3, 2015 by msblossom

[Sew Sumi]

Who does this? 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0-1JdDqWiC/?taken-by=ezellon

 

Or this? 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0-6gNjKWts/?taken-by=ezellon

 

They're like creepy Glamour Shots. 

[GEML]

Are those so odd? They aren't to my taste, but I've seen plenty of similar (and in the second photo, that same project) in tons of photo albums and walls, and have for about 30 years now. And no, not only religious people - plenty of people who never stepped foot in a church have some of the oddest photos.

[3girlsforus]

I agree - those don't seem that odd to me either. The first picture reminds me of a kinds of those supposedly sentimental photographs they do around wedding and newlywed times. We have one of us staring down at our hands with our wedding rings on them. The photographer told us to do it ... so we did. Now I look at it and think 'okay - what the heck' but it's stuff people do when they are young and just married.

[Sew Sumi]

Sorry, I just find them pretty narcissistic. But then, look at who we're talking about here. :)

[SusieQZie]

That first picture of them inside the ring is creepy!

Edited April 3, 2015 by SusieQZie

[JoanArc]

Yikes. The Sweet Fellowship of the Ring!

[Barb23]

This.  James has always been my #1 favorite Duggar.  I've always said I'd like to rescue that kid and bring him to my house. 

 

Has nobody commented on Me-chelle's voice as they were looking at the table of remembrance (which Guinn did beautifully, BTW)

 

Me-chelle {to Josie}  - "Josie, do you know who that is??"  {17 octaves higher}  "It's Grandpa Duggar!!!"  

 

My yellow lab turned around to see what the heck was making that noise.

 

My 9 year old made me rewind it twice.

  

I commented earlier on MEchelle's voice during this scene. I didn't really notice it the first time I watched it but boy when I watched it again, she sure got my attention with her higher than normal octave. Another poster caught that Grandma said "Josie wasn't even born yet" (to know Grandpa Duggar) to which MEchelle screeched something like "Josie knows who he is & we show her pictures of him." In another family, I would believe this, not so much the Duggars. Go Grandma.

They didn't write the vows. They admitted that they got them elsewhere (probably online, but they'll never admit it).

I guess it was too good to be true that they wrote their own vows.

[JenCarroll]

Who does this?

https://instagram.com/p/0-1JdDqWiC/?taken-by=ezellon

Or this?

https://instagram.com/p/0-6gNjKWts/?taken-by=ezellon

I love how this guy describes his photo-shop work as "hand crafted."

Edited April 3, 2015 by JenCarroll

[Wellfleet]

Michelle is holed off in the Prayer Closet writing out Benchelle fan fic right now. 50 Shades of Beige.

 

LOL - 50 Shades of Beige!!! This is why we need another button here - one for posts that make us burst out laughing!!

 

PS - if Me-chelle wrote this book, it would be a fast read because as we now know, with Boob "it doesn't take too long..." According to Me-chelle at least.

[Wellfleet]

She probably had some adjustments to increase it's modesty. I think it's gorgeous either way.

 

It really is. One of THEE prettiest dresses I've seen in years. Stunned that a Duggar had that much good taste [makes me hopeful for the future - LOL]. Haven't seen one I've liked this much since Caroline Kennedy's. That was really pretty too. Quite simple all in all, pure white, big organza skirt and a bodice trimmed all over with little white shamrocks.

Edited April 3, 2015 by Wellfleet

[purpleflowers]

I just have to say there is something so annoying about Jill and Derick as a couple. I can't quite put my finger on it. They are obviously not bad people or anything, they are just plain annoying to hear and watch! Jill always gazing at Derick while he talks, the obsession with being a couple, the whole "we're" pregnant thing. 

 

I loved Jessa's dress. Did not like the music that was played as Jessa entered the aisle. Pretty touching episode, and great to see emotion from Jessa too. I admit I kind of teared up when Jinger was giving a speech and crying.

[andromeda331]

About the reception, the Duggars live in a home with industrial kitchen, enough pots and pans to prepare enough food for a reception and enough space outside to hold the reception. Why don't they use any of that? Whether they did it themselves or let Sierra and the volunteers put it together. If you have all that stuff why not use it? They could save a ton of money to put towards food, tables and chairs. Or buy tables and chairs since they were having two wedding receptions and will probably have like what eight or nine more? They'd get plenty of use out of them. I realize their cheap but their not even picking the cheapest and easiest option.