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Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)


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If a person/family was never featured on any of the Duggar shows, and is not related to the Duggar family by blood or marriage, they do not need to be discussed here..

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Didn't you just love Poor Sarah's post dedicated to mocha making from Monday? Absolutely riveting stuff there. 

Chelsy's blog is far more entertaining and doesn't shove religion down your throat like Maxhell. 

Edited by Sew Sumi
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14 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Didn't you just love Poor Sarah's post dedicated to mocha making from Monday?

Chelsy's blog is far more entertaining and doesn't shove religion down your throat like Maxhell. 

I know I'm shallow, but every time I look at the Maxwell's blog, all I can think about is how unfortunate looking all of the Maxwell girls are.  Well, that and remembering what a schmuck their father is/

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2 hours ago, louannems said:

Another snark board, Free Jinger, has a member who friends Jill Rod on her private Facebook. That's what Jill said.  It sounds like they are still awaiting the neuroradiologist's reading.

The pictures from J-Rod's page show her crying while holding Janessa. And then one where she's trying to smile for a camera but you can see her entire face is bright red from crying. 

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I really feel awful for Jill Rod and little Nessie. I may not agree with her beliefs and actions, but she really has a lot on her shoulders. I hope she's getting some good support. I hope they get good news from the tests and Nessie can overcome her challenges.

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51 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

I know I'm shallow, but every time I look at the Maxwell's blog, all I can think about is how unfortunate looking all of the Maxwell girls are.  Well, that and remembering what a schmuck their father is/

If you're shallow, I'm shallow. The Maxwell boys are homely, too, but at least they don't make me think "neigh, horsey." 

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I checked out the  Bontrager Maxwell wedding pictures & noticed some things:

There is one picture of an announcement that was either at church or reception. At the bottom of the card, the happy couple list their new address & phone number.  Thats fine to show at the wedding but why would they post a picture of it without blocking out their personal info?  So now the whole world has their address & phone #. 

John & Chelsey did a First Look.  A couple of the pictures had to have been taken after the ceremony as John is wearing his wedding ring. 

I didn't know Chelsy forgot to bring her vows to ceremony & had to get them.  But wouldn't you think with a huge wedding party that someone would have checked to make sure she had them?

Did they have a drone at the wedding? 

Yes, @Sew Sumi that mocha making post on the Maxwell site was riveting.  What is their obsession with coffee?  So many of their pictures & posts revolve around them making or getting coffee  or fellowshipping with friends at a coffee place.  Dont they ever meet friends at a regular restaurant?  BTW, wouldn't  coffee be forbidden in their house since it has caffeine in it like Pepsi, which was the downfall of Terri?

Please make room for me at the "shallow" table regarding the Maxwell ladies looks.  I know they can't help their looks, but I think more flattering hairstyles would help.  Their longer hair just elongates their faces making the Horsey look more prevalent.  Terri could use some hair color too to help with her washed out look as well as modern, more flattering glasses.  

How old are Ma & Pa Maxwell?  

Were the Duggars at the wedding since they are friends or acquaintances of the Bontragers?  (Or was that friendship just for the show?)

Edited by Barb23
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Mere and Pere Maxwell are in their early 60's. 

As for the First Look pics, Chelsy said in the comments that they wore their rings on purpose. There was a lot of stuff that was tweaked just so for this wedding. 

Did anyone else notice how high the Maxwell clan hiked up those gray camis under the bridesmaids' dresses? You can't even see the camis on the other ladies in the group. The necklaces provided enough "modesty" for them. Wanna bet Anna Marie took up the straps a couple of inches on all five camis (she and Elissa were also bridesmaids in addition to the 3 Max daughters).

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I had to go back & check out the camis on the bridesmaids. Why couldn't they have worn turquoise colored camis to make it look like they were part of the dress rather than gray ones? 

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the wedding colors seem to be teal and gray. Melanie was a bridesmaid.

From Chelsy's blog; Here's here explanation of the outfits:

"At the end of the day, the dress I chose for my bridesmaids was this Beachcoco dress in teal blue. I was a little worried about how it would look to have a cami underneath-I really was not interested in a frumpy look and I was pretty concerned about that. I realized that a white cami was not an option-it would stick out to much and just look weird. However, I realized that if I had grey/silver necklaces that had a lot of detail around the neckline, it would layer well on the cami and the necklace would be the focal point, not the camisole neckline underneath. I found grey camisoles at Walmart for $1.64 each! I sewed up the straps a little bit on them and they were good to go. The necklaces I used for my bridesmaids were also the same kind that my sisters and I wore at the double wedding and they were from Walmart as well.

I loved this bridesmaid dress because, first of all, it was super flattering on all of the different body types + sizes. Secondly, it actually was a maternity dress, but it worked out great for all of the bridesmaids. It was one of those styles that could easily be maternity or non-maternity. It was even nursing-friendly for the two nursing mama bridesmaids! Thirdly, I loved how practical it was---it isn't a typical formal and so it isn't limited to only formal events-it was perfect for a number of occasions. And it was SO comfortable! (I know this, because I even got an extra one for myself, to wear later, and I love it)"

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21 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Yep, Nurie had a suitor about a year ago who gave her amazingly wonderful gifts from the Dollar Store and GUM, y’all!!!  It was very fourth grade level ‘romance’ and he disappeared without a trace, probably after spending an hour or two with his future in laws.  I guess he stole a piece of her heart because there hasn’t been anyone since.

Poor Nurie. She and the other kids are the innocents in the Rodrigues train wreck. Who could blame any potential suitor for running after spending time with David and Jill?

20 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I kinda wonder if Jill ended Nurie's courtship when she found out that she was pregnant.  I'm sure Nurie will be needed to help care for her siblings. 

Hmm, I'm not sure about that. There are so many Rodrigues girls that I feel Jill would be willing to sacrifice Nurie for the greater good that the attention from a wedding would bring her.

13 hours ago, Loves2Dance said:

That's only because they have money and a spotlight. They used to wear the same frumpy praisie styled dresses we used to see the Duggars in too. I too wouldn't call them progressive. Gil is far more fundie than JB. 

I don't know about more, but just as fundie, yes. 

6 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Didn't you just love Poor Sarah's post dedicated to mocha making from Monday? Absolutely riveting stuff there. 

Chelsy's blog is far more entertaining and doesn't shove religion down your throat like Maxhell. 

Ha, I have to admit it had me riveted, mainly because I've become obsessed with mochas from this great coffee shop but they're expensive. However, having to buy all the equipment Sarah mentioned doesn't look cheap either!

5 hours ago, Normades said:

I really feel awful for Jill Rod and little Nessie. I may not agree with her beliefs and actions, but she really has a lot on her shoulders. I hope she's getting some good support. I hope they get good news from the tests and Nessie can overcome her challenges.

I'm sure everyone here agrees. A child with special needs is not something to be gleeful about. 

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2 hours ago, becca3891 said:

Poor Nurie. She and the other kids are the innocents in the Rodrigues train wreck. Who could blame any potential suitor for running after spending time with David and Jill?

Hmm, I'm not sure about that. There are so many Rodrigues girls that I feel Jill would be willing to sacrifice Nurie for the greater good that the attention from a wedding would bring her.

I don't know about more, but just as fundie, yes. 

Ha, I have to admit it had me riveted, mainly because I've become obsessed with mochas from this great coffee shop but they're expensive. However, having to buy all the equipment Sarah mentioned doesn't look cheap either!

I'm sure everyone here agrees. A child with special needs is not something to be gleeful about. 

@becca3891 my daughter has Down Syndrome and your comment is down right offensive. "A child with special needs is not something to be gleeful about" 

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9 hours ago, doodlebug said:

I know I'm shallow, but every time I look at the Maxwell's blog, all I can think about is how unfortunate looking all of the Maxwell girls are.  Well, that and remembering what a schmuck their father is/

The Maxwell girls are in desperate need of a good makeover. New clothes, new hairstyles and some good makeup. I think they will never find a man stuck in their fundie looks. I don't even understand how the frumpsters are even appealing to any girl in this modern age.

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1 hour ago, Farmfam said:

@becca3891 my daughter has Down Syndrome and your comment is down right offensive. "A child with special needs is not something to be gleeful about" 

Gonna have to agree with this as another mom on here with a child who has special needs. I implore you to look up what Ableism is @becca3891 and never, absolutely, never ever say something like that again. 

On second thought, here is the definition of Albeism for anyone who may be interested in it: "Ableism – The practices and dominant attitudes in society that devalue and limit the potential of persons with disabilities. A set of practices and beliefs that assign inferior value (worth) to people who have developmental, emotional, physical or psychiatric disabilities." 

Edited by Loves2Dance
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I have known many children with special needs and loved them all. But they do need more time and attention and help than “normal” children. And in poor Nessie’s case, Jill has other small children who also still need her time and attention, and I don’t think JRod has enough to go around. So which kid gets short changed?  Will it be Nessie, who will probably need more intervention than JRod has ever given?  Or will it be Sofia/Olivia/whoever is still young?   

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I have a cousin who is higher functioning disabled, and he is one of the sweetest, kindest person I have ever met. He has been more of an older brother to me than my own brother. I use to work with adults with special needs, and yes it was hard work, but in some ways sad because of what they have been through. I wanted to take some of them home with me to give them all the love and care they need and deserve.

And the sad fact is the definition of Albeism can be related to the Duggars also especially when it comes to their own children. Makes me angry. No one should ever be made fun of because they may have a physical or mental disability or illness.

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31 minutes ago, McManda said:

I don't want to speak for @becca3891 but I assumed she meant it was the potential Jill was gleeful specifically at the possibility of having a special needs baby because of the implication Jill would exploit it that was the issue, not that  baby Janessa could potentially be less of a person because of any potential special needs.

Jill tends to be overdramatic (her weirdly capital words don't help) and make everything about her (a baby shower for #13 where Mama gets gifts like a new beefing set?), so I don't think it's really a jump to assume she's going to use Janessa to bring attention to herself, especially if Janessa faces challenges her other kids didn't. I can see blog posts about how Jill took the TREACHEROUS trip to a neurologist appointment after being EXHAUSTED from staying up all night to watch the baby sleep just IN CASE, coupled with overexaggerations of the actual scenario (just like her pregnancy - a severe in utero stroke that would require immediate, swift after birth monitoring and a breech baby that would most certainly require a c-section ... none of which we're aware happened because God Is Good). 

I hope Janessa doesn't get lost behind Jill's narcissism and stupidity.

I see your point of view. Sadly the poor baby could be use just like Josie has been use by the Duggars for their pro life anti abortion spiel instead of getting the help Josie looks like she might need.

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8 hours ago, Barb23 said:

Yes, @Sew Sumi that mocha making post on the Maxwell site was riveting.  What is their obsession with coffee?  So many of their pictures & posts revolve around them making or getting coffee  or fellowshipping with friends at a coffee place.  Dont they ever meet friends at a regular restaurant?  BTW, wouldn't  coffee be forbidden in their house since it has caffeine in it like Pepsi, which was the downfall of Terri?

When I was going to an extremely fundy/strict church, their obsession with coffee was explained as "the only drug we're allowed to have". 

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38 minutes ago, bigskygirl said:

 I see your point of view. Sadly the poor baby could be use just like Josie has been use by the Duggars for their pro life anti abortion spiel instead of getting the help Josie looks like she might need.

Josie has progressed better than I thought she would without intervention. Yes, she desperately needs speech therapy, and for them to stop treating her like she's still a baby, but she fits in with the rest of the kids and will probably end up married to another clueless fundy, having baby after baby just like the rest of them.

If Janessa has neurological issues, I really hope they are required to get her help. It's one thing to say, "well, she's a micro-premie, she's still behind her chronological age" to justify not getting early childhood intervention. It's another to have substantiated neurological damage and not jump on therapy as soon as possible.

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1 hour ago, Nysha said:

Josie has progressed better than I thought she would without intervention. Yes, she desperately needs speech therapy, and for them to stop treating her like she's still a baby, but she fits in with the rest of the kids and will probably end up married to another clueless fundy, having baby after baby just like the rest of them.

If Janessa has neurological issues, I really hope they are required to get her help. It's one thing to say, "well, she's a micro-premie, she's still behind her chronological age" to justify not getting early childhood intervention. It's another to have substantiated neurological damage and not jump on therapy as soon as possible.

Josie may fit in with the kids in Duggar Land, but I can imagine how well she would not fit in with kids her own age in a real public school. I hope the baby gets the help she may need.

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4 hours ago, Fuzzysox said:

The Maxwell girls are in desperate need of a good makeover. New clothes, new hairstyles and some good makeup. I think they will never find a man stuck in their fundie looks. I don't even understand how the frumpsters are even appealing to any girl in this modern age.

they are not supposed to find husbands because  Not-Maxwells are never going to please Stevehova's need for control over everybody . 

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1 hour ago, Nysha said:

When I was going to an extremely fundy/strict church, their obsession with coffee was explained as "the only drug we're allowed to have". 

I was a Seventh Day Adventist for many years. Coffee, along with tea, caffeinated soda, cards, dancing and I'm sure more, was all evil.

Of course, there were plenty of members who did drink coffee, but they were usually very sly and sneaky about it so other members wouldn't find out.

I agree, I'm shocked Steve hasn't shut their coffee love down.  He doesn't want them to have any passions at all except Bible.

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23 minutes ago, riverblue22 said:

The Maxwells are probably allowed coffee (as opposed to that devil's drink Pepsi) because Steve Maxwell likes it.

I'm an admitted Starbucks whore, but there's something really tragic when the only bright spot in your life is mochas. Those girls need to get out of the house once in a while.

Edited by BitterApple
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2 hours ago, bigskygirl said:

I see your point of view. Sadly the poor baby could be use just like Josie has been use by the Duggars for their pro life anti abortion spiel instead of getting the help Josie looks like she might need.

Of course Jill is going to use the baby. It's her grifting gold ticket. I am not saying it's because of the baby more like it's Jill's lot in life to grift because she loves JESUS!

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26 minutes ago, riverblue22 said:

The Maxwells are probably allowed coffee (as opposed to that devil's drink Pepsi) because Steve Maxwell likes it.

Ding ding ding...we have a winner. Banishing Pepsi was just a way for Steve to control Terri. If not Pepsi, it would have been saltines or dishwasher tabs or name-brand maxi pads or something else he didn't feel was important. 

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I just saw this in the Daily Mail. It’s a statement by Jessica Willis detailing her abuse at the hands of her father. Scroll about halfway through the article to read her full statement. It is heartbreaking and disturbing and does make you wonder what really goes on behind the  supposedly perfect facade put on by so many of these families.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5613193/Willis-sister-Jessica-speaks-abuse-left-family.html

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23 minutes ago, EVS said:

I just saw this in the Daily Mail. It’s a statement by Jessica Willis detailing her abuse at the hands of her father. Scroll about halfway through the article to read her full statement. It is heartbreaking and disturbing and does make you wonder what really goes on behind the  supposedly perfect facade put on by so many of these families.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5613193/Willis-sister-Jessica-speaks-abuse-left-family.html

How horrible that was for them to go through. I hope he gets his  "reward" for all of that child molestation in prison. 

Edited by ChiCricket
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3 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

How horrible that was for them to go through. I hope he gets his  "reward" for all of that child molestation in prison. 

I hope so too. 

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30 minutes ago, EVS said:

I just saw this in the Daily Mail. It’s a statement by Jessica Willis detailing her abuse at the hands of her father. Scroll about halfway through the article to read her full statement. It is heartbreaking and disturbing and does make you wonder what really goes on behind the  supposedly perfect facade put on by so many of these families.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5613193/Willis-sister-Jessica-speaks-abuse-left-family.html

It's interesting the Willis guy used the same "divide and conquer" tactics with his kids that Boob and Michelle use with theirs. Playing favorites, witholding affection from those who didn't toe the line, controlling every aspect of their lives. The Duggars encouraged their kids to rat each other out under the guise of "accountability," knowing it would cause resentment and mistrust between them. 

I hope Old Man Willis is having a very enjoyable time in prison. 

Edited by BitterApple
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I was coming to post the same thing about Jessica Willis. What a horrifying life those kids lead. Brenda knew but did nothing......she majored in education she SHOULD know better(mandated reporter). I don't have any words. 

Edited by Fuzzysox
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1 hour ago, EVS said:

I just saw this in the Daily Mail. It’s a statement by Jessica Willis detailing her abuse at the hands of her father. Scroll about halfway through the article to read her full statement. It is heartbreaking and disturbing and does make you wonder what really goes on behind the  supposedly perfect facade put on by so many of these families.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5613193/Willis-sister-Jessica-speaks-abuse-left-family.html

Wow. Powerful story. I hope the whole family continues to seek help and heal.

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That was heartbreaking to read. Those poor kids. I can't imagine being in a situation where I'm still being physically punished at 23 by my father. This explains Jair's incredible anger issues that were apparent in the TV show.

 It makes me wonder if the Duggar's don't have similar hold on their adult children.

I thought Toby was convicted of molesting the 4 oldest, but if he started with Jessica when she was 3 he probably molested all of the girls. Jessica isn't condemning her mother for allowing it to happen, but she's not ignoring that fact, either. Given that she watched Toby beat Jessica and then allowed her to hide her bleeding body from the police makes her mother complicit in the physical abuse, not to mention knowing he was molesting her daughters and not turning him in. Again, typical for this sick mindset, being on TV trumps protecting your children.

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3 hours ago, EVS said:

I just saw this in the Daily Mail. It’s a statement by Jessica Willis detailing her abuse at the hands of her father. Scroll about halfway through the article to read her full statement. It is heartbreaking and disturbing and does make you wonder what really goes on behind the  supposedly perfect facade put on by so many of these families.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5613193/Willis-sister-Jessica-speaks-abuse-left-family.html

I read this.  Heartbreaking and disturbing is right.  I never watched the show but I followed the story.  The evil done in the name of religion is always shocking to me.  

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On 4/13/2018 at 6:44 PM, OpieTaylor said:

My two cents - I thought becca was assuring the other poster that we do all CARE about Janessa - that we aren't hoping for the worst 

It was my post that received the response. Having read the comments, there is no need to assure me that everyone is hoping for the best for little Janessa. It's pretty obvious. I was just voicing my empathy for Jill and hope for the baby. I don't know why anyone would think I was of the opinion that I'm the only one wishing them well because nothing could be further from the truth. As the sibling of someone with Down Syndrome, I was a little hurt by the reply. I hope it was just something that I, and others misinterpreted since apparently my own comment has also been misinterpreted.

I know lots of people here care about the welfare of the baby and all those children. I thought the outpouring of concern has been pretty awesome.

Edited by Normades
made correction
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9 minutes ago, toodles said:

I read this.  Heartbreaking and disturbing is right.  I never watched the show but I followed the story.  The evil done in the name of religion is always shocking to me.  

I didn't mean to quote my own post.  My bad.

I meant to edit my post to express my admiration for the courageous author.  She managed to escape from her brutal situation and she took the next (and at least as difficult, if not more so) step to seek the help she needs.  She is true hero for stepping into the light.

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39 minutes ago, toodles said:

I read this.  Heartbreaking and disturbing is right.  I never watched the show but I followed the story.  The evil done in the name of religion is always shocking to me.  

 I was interested in them because I am from Illinois and followed the story of the car accident and the subsequent license-for-bribes scandal. I also saw them on America’s got Talent. I watched the first episode of their show and found it boring. I meant to try another episode but never got around to it. Now, knowing what was going on, I’m glad I didn’t watch it.   Regarding the sentence I bolded: I consider myself a religious person (although the Duggars would consider me a heathen) and completely agree. 

Edited by EVS
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1 hour ago, EVS said:

 I was interested in them because I am from Illinois and followed the story of the car accident and the subsequent license-for-bribes scandal. I also saw them on America’s got Talent. I watched the first episode of their show and found it boring. I meant to try another episode but never got around to it. Now, knowing what was going on, I’m glad I didn’t watch it.   Regarding the sentence I bolded: I consider myself a religious person (although the Duggars would consider me a heathen) and completely agree. 

Remember how many times we saw this story on the news? It was all over the news for months. Scott and Janet are salt of the earth types, having a monster for a son must be shocking to them.

I'm glad that Jessica had the strength to get the hell out of that house. I don't understand why she didn't run to her grandparents? Maybe Toby wasn't close to them? I would hope/think she would have felt safe at her grandparents? So many questions.

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21 hours ago, Normades said:

I really feel awful for Jill Rod and little Nessie. I may not agree with her beliefs and actions, but she really has a lot on her shoulders. I hope she's getting some good support. I hope they get good news from the tests and Nessie can overcome her challenges.

From reading posts on FJ it doesn't sound good. The baby has a lot of serious issues. I lifted this post from there. The poster is littlemommy. I hope it's someone here because I just want to say excellent post about Nessie.

Live video from Jill:

*She's hoping to be discharged today with the baby. Jill looks and sounds exhausted.

*The regular newborn tests were all fine. The MRI showed the baby's brain was "different". God still formed her perfectly, because he doesn't make mistakes and all, but she's different.

*The soft spot on the baby's head allows for flexibility. Doctors aren't sure about her "long term journey". Seizures and developmental issues and mobility delays are possible. MRI showed "cystic" area in brain and is putting pressure on the other side of her brain, leading to swelling. The area that connects the hemispheres of the brain is partly missing.

*The regular newborn tests were all fine. The MRI showed the baby's brain was "different". God still formed her perfectly, because he doesn't make mistakes and all, but she's different.

*The soft spot on the baby's head allows for flexibility. Doctors aren't sure about her "long term journey". Seizures and developmental issues and mobility delays are possible. MRI showed "cystic" area in brain and is putting pressure on the other side of her brain, leading to swelling. The area that connects the hemispheres of the brain is partly missing.

(to be cont)

Jill video continued:

*There's nothing Jill did that led to this happening, the doctors say. 

*There was nothing to be done for the baby until birth, now the monitoring and hoping begins. Apparently things were already concerning with the in utero MRI, look worse after the post birth MRI (just because it's clearer, I'm guessing, not because something happened during birth)

*Jill talks about burdens and keeping faith. Everything is going to be perfect according to God's plan, because his ways are perfect. A neurologist is going to follow the baby closely as she grows. Jill knows some developmental therapy will probably be in their future. Thre are no definite answers right now.

*Jill is trusting God "for a miracle" to make Janessa fine and wants your prayers. She does sound pretty accepting of the situation. She says they're not going to focus on the worry of it, just try to go on as normal and do what the doctors advise for Janessa. 

*The Rods are going to embrace Janessa Ruth the way she was sent.

*And now Jill's crying, and so am I.

THE END

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