S03.E12: A Stand Against Stassi

[Teddybear]

 

I remember Jax mentioning Kristin.

Oops you're right.  I must have dozed off when he was going through the list.  

 

This is the first time I've ever seen Stassi look like she'd been kicked in the stomach.  She seemed on the verge of tears throughout the whole meeting with Katie.  

[Ubiquitous]

At first, wgen they showed StASSi showing off her lame necklaces, I thought the guy was her phantom boyfriend. Oh well, maybe next time.

[portfino]

Something tells me writing a stand-up routine based around Jax has precisely the opposite effect than what Kristen's friend wants.

 

Katie's takedown of Stassi was great. Someone should splice it in with NBA players being posterized and Jim Ross providing OTT commentary.

[sunrisepink]

I officially hate Vail after this episode. If you don't want the guys at SUR to think you're interested, don't flirt with them! It was painful to watch her attempts to humiliate Peter on the faux date.

[Duke2801]

I officially hate Vail after this episode. If you don't want the guys at SUR to think you're interested, don't flirt with them! It was painful to watch her attempts to humiliate Peter on the faux date.

 

Is it not possible that he just misinterpreted her being a normal, friendly human being as "flirting"?   I mean, men *have* been known to do that once or twice or eleventy billion times the world over. 

Edited January 20, 2015 by Duke2801

[Persnickety1]

I feel like somebody should do an intervention for Ari along the lines of "if you're on a fucked up show surrounded by fuck-ups you're probably also fucked up".  Being the shinniest fucked up penny is not anything to really feel that good about..........

 

Someone needs to inform Golden Nugget that when one is feeding at the same Bravo trough as one's castmates, you, too, are hence a piglet.

 

Speaking of pigs...  

 

Peter, my eye candy on this show....

 

After seeing that pigsty you call a bedroom, all of my illusions are shattered beyond repair.

 

I realize you're a single guy but, damn, even in my wildest days before I met Mr. Persnickety, had someone taken me to that dreadful and filthy bedroom, I would have been out of there in a hot damned second.

 

And what the actual fuck was that stain on the sheets the camera focused in on?

 

And used Magnum condom wrappers laying around?

 

I'm devastated.  No more Harlequin Romance fantasies for me.  

[ghoulina]

I officially hate Vail after this episode. If you don't want the guys at SUR to think you're interested, don't flirt with them! It was painful to watch her attempts to humiliate Peter on the faux date.

 

Yea. I'm not saying Peter and Jax are saints or anything (the latter, clearly), but Vail does seem to flirt a lot. I can't tell yet if she's just one of those people who is very friendly and flirtatious without meaning anything by it, or if she's one of those girls who likes to flirt and get the guys around her to do whatever she wants. 

[RealityTVSmack]

Don't hate me for saying this...but look as I might I don't see one redeeming quality among these reality stars. What rock did LisaV find these cast mates living under. Just one big cluster-F of the dregs of society?!?

I know they're supposed to entertain us...but now they are beginning to scare me. Kristen twists her ex and makes him cry like a faucet...then arranges for his one-nite stand to confront him? Vail flirts like she's on steroids with Peter while saying she can't remember what she did with Jax only to publicly talk smack about Peter for believing he was on a date?!? Stassi and the others just a read away from mentally deficient.

It just gets worse and worse and all reflects back on LisaV...who appears to be the madam for a restaurant of ill repute, lol.

Edited January 20, 2015 by RealityTVSmack

[Ubiquitous]

Something tells me writing a stand-up routine based around Jax has precisely the opposite effect than what Kristen's friend wants.

Oh yeah, I totally forgot about that part! I cringed when they flashed to part of her lame routine and then revealed it was Jax. I did not want or need to know that. I bet anyone who watched her so-called comedy routine is taking a hot shower with a scouring pad and bleach now.

[heebiejeebie]

I noticed the dedication at the end of this episode : In Memory of George Gregory Pitt, Jr.  I had to look him up to find out he was a trainer on Work Out who got hit by a commuter train.  Sad.

 

I missed this  Was it really tacked to the end of VPR?  That is so incredibly odd and random seeing as his new show was scheduled to follow right after (I did not see if it did and think it crude and crass and rather disgusting if it did....i.e. BRAVO).  Why wouldn't it be on the airing of the fake relationship show they slapped together hoping that 1. no would notice it was nothing more than a revamped version of the previous Singles Experiment which turned out to be nothing but a slightly spun version of yet another singles pretend to hook up candid reality show.  Again....i.e. BRAVO.

 

Or why would wonk eyed Cohen be given the part as the live/up to date voice of BRAVO programming to mention it instead and try to at least put some kind of spin as to why the fake show is still going to be run (I have sympathy for the Plitt family but he seems like he was just downright stupid and it caught up with him -- nice body, overtweaked face and huge famewhore...may he rest in peace -- I wonder if WE will trot out his just Mystery Millionaire episode?  They are worse than BRAVO in terms of grace and class).

 

Vail is someone who strikes me hard and heavy as someone who needs to have constant affirmation that she is PRETTY and hot and boys like her.  and is too shallow and self absorbed and has been lucky in life enough despite her powdered woes to not know what to do with it once she has it or really care to.  In other words perfect casting. 

 

More and more as I watch these people who are my age or horrifically even older and living the life the guy who moves out to live with a bud while delivering pizzas for rent and free grub so he can otherwise play video games all day, sleep to 2 pm and basically think he is living the life at the age of nineteen, I'm amused and find it not only a huge ego boost at where I am.  But I also wonder in L.A. just how many Peters Jaxs and Toms there are who refuse to give up and just settle in low rent scuzzy apts that will never be a home or have a true life.  Because this small representation clearly thinks via this show they have it made.   That is what makes watching this a save from being so sad and pathetic as a whole.  They go to San diego to mingle in a pool smaller than mine with a broken down sound system some skanky babes and buds who the fuck knows what is in the water and these people think they are living Large! 

 

I can be a thrown it down and leave it where it is kind of guy.  For a day.  Cameras coming?  You could perform bowel surgery on my floors counters and pretty much every other surface.  So I have to wonder if Peter is just that dim or if he actually thinks the filthy chaos makes him look youthful and "free".    All it does to me is make him look like one of the mule riders of the VPRpoxalypse.

[walnutqueen]

I missed this  Was it really tacked to the end of VPR?  That is so incredibly odd and random seeing as his new show was scheduled to follow right after (I did not see if it did and think it crude and crass and rather disgusting if it did....i.e. BRAVO).  Why wouldn't it be on the airing of the fake relationship show they slapped together hoping that 1. no would notice it was nothing more than a revamped version of the previous Singles Experiment which turned out to be nothing but a slightly spun version of yet another singles pretend to hook up candid reality show.  Again....i.e. BRAVO.

 

Or why would wonk eyed Cohen be given the part as the live/up to date voice of BRAVO programming to mention it instead and try to at least put some kind of spin as to why the fake show is still going to be run (I have sympathy for the Plitt family but he seems like he was just downright stupid and it caught up with him -- nice body, overtweaked face and huge famewhore...may he rest in peace -- I wonder if WE will trot out his just Mystery Millionaire episode?  They are worse than BRAVO in terms of grace and class).

 

My bad, heebiejeebie.  It came on screen after VPR, so I suppose it was actually at the beginning of that other whatever-the-fuck Bravo show. 

 

I don't get these people, either.  By the time I was 25, I'd been married & divorced, bought and sold a condo, and started my own business after working several other jobs.  It is baffling to see them all living in relative squalor and seemingly at a dead end.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Yeah, the dedication to Greg Plitt was intended to run right before Friends & Lovers (which looks totally unwatchable to me), which Greg Plitt had a part on.  Just happened that Friends & Lovers ran right after VPR & his death occurred over the weekend.  Don't think this had anything to do with our chucklefucks.  I can't even imagine Greg having anything to do with the chucklefucks. 

[heebiejeebie]

Running it in between the two shows makes it easy to misunderstand walnutqueen.  I get that Bravo doesn't want to just cast aside a show because someone died tragically.  Let alone speak at the top of the show in any way that pulls the curtains back and shows how fake these relationship shows are getting (I wonder if Millionaire Matchmaker's production is behind the new slant on singles candid reality shows BRAVO is putting out?)  But maybe they should have devoted more than a graphic to the matter?

 

I think Gregg Plitt would have jumped at the chance to be a regular on VPR.  He was more than happy to play Jackie Warner's grungy bad boy and have a "relationship" with a co star.  Did Mystery Millionaire and now this.  If Lisa could have fit a trainer into the show's storyline as a regular he would have jumped all over it.  And, I guess too late to speak ill of the dead, from what I knew of him, would have fit right in and loved every minute of the camera time.  From a girl he pursued after Workout, he came off as charming for ten seconds and vapid self aborbed for the remaining 50 and anything past a minute made you long for a root canal and she actually had a picture of him looking at himself in the reflection of a glass at the table they were sitting at.  Damn fine body though.  Certainly better by far than anything on this one.  If I have to look at Schwartz or Kristin's pretend boyfriend in a swimsuit again this season I'm going to have to record more and ff through as I cannot stand either's skinny-flab white puffiness.  Schwartz looks like he is preparing for the role as a popped open can of Pillsbury Crescent Rolls.  For a model his body is so soft and doughy and yet scrawny at the same time I immediately "put a shirt on".  Of course when Jax comes on I yell the same thing  Well first I yell "put a bag over it, a family size one cause that noggin is something even Linus would find threatening."

Edited January 20, 2015 by heebiejeebie

[ScoobieDoobs]

Is it not possible that he just misinterpreted her being a normal, friendly human being as "flirting"?   I mean, men *have* been known to do that once or twice or eleventy billion times the world over.

 

 

I'm sure Jax and Peter do this all the time.  But Vail was acting pretty damn flirty -- to the point of being annoying (er, maybe to me, but clearly not to Peter).  "You're really working out, Peter."  Blink, blink, blink.  "Oooh, you're getting soooo much bigger, Peter,"  Blink, blink, blink.  "Oh, Peter, why do you wear such a tight, shirt?"  Blink, blink, blink.  Oh man, she was giving her eyelashes a workout there.  And why the implication to him that she was so drunk in Miami she didn't know what happened between her & Jax sexually?  She sure as fuck was pretty clear to us she didn't do nothin' with Jax.  More flirty bullshit?  Why the heavy cock teasing & then pulling back so quick?  I thought they did make sort of a cute couple.  Maybe the script called for them to not be a couple?

 

So is white eyeliner a big thing now or is it just Stassi?  When she was wiping her eyes in disbelief that Katie was no longer obeying her commands, all I saw was a shit-ton of white eyeliner gunked up in the corners of her eyes.  WTF?

Edited January 20, 2015 by ScoobieDoobs

[meeeeech]

UGH the white eyeliner. @ScoobieDoobs, putting light colored eyeliner in your waterline/inner eye corner is supposed to make your eyes look bigger and more awake. The problem is stark white eyeliner looks really unnatural and kind of scary. Stassi is just full of bad makeup and wardrobe decisions this season.

[ScoobieDoobs]

I think Gregg Plitt would have jumped at the chance to be a regular on VPR.  He was more than happy to play Jackie Warner's grungy bad boy and have a "relationship" with a co star.  Did Mystery Millionaire and now this.  If Lisa could have fit a trainer into the show's storyline as a regular he would have jumped all over it.  And, I guess too late to speak ill of the dead, from what I knew of him, would have fit right in and loved every minute of the camera time.  From a girl he pursued after Workout, he came off as charming for ten seconds and vapid self aborbed for the remaining 50 and anything past a minute made you long for a root canal and she actually had a picture of him looking at himself in the reflection of a glass at the table they were sitting at.  Damn fine body though.  Certainly better by far than anything on this one. 

 

 

I couldn't picture how Greg Plitt would in any way fit in with da chucklefucks, but thanks, Heebie, for putting out this scenario cuz it gave me a hearty chuckle.  My theory is Andy did like Greg (who could blame him?) and was looking for some way to get him on Bravo.  The prob was where would he fit.

 

Certainly putting Greg on VPR woulda provided us with endless giggles.  I mean, Jax seems deluded enough into thinking he's got a great body, but standing next to Greg certainly woulda shaken him to his core (whatever core there is).  And how would FI have dealt with being next to someone so hot?  Fallen on his knees or just cried?  

 

Well, my thought on Greg is that his life was so consumed by his dedication (obsession in my eyes) to fitness, it curtailed what he could do with most of his time.  Sure, he'd jump at a chance to be on any reality show, especially this one.  But it woulda been a stretch to fit him into the script.  Would he have had time in his life to actually work any type of job at SUR?  Given his lifestyle & diet constraints, would he ever in a zillion years have worked at a place like SUR?  Doesn't seem believable.  Ah, but then again, who cares?  The contrast between him & da chucklefucks in looks alone woulda been awesome.

[DrSparkles]

I noticed the dedication at the end of this episode : In Memory of George Gregory Pitt, Jr.  I had to look him up to find out he was a trainer on Work Out who got hit by a commuter train.  Sad.

I would come back from the dead if someone dedicated this show to my memory. Like Jesus, but way more pissed off.

[OnceSane]

Poor Kristina. Stassi has no friends but still won't be seen with you.

Jax calling his left nut his "good one" gave me a chuckle.

[BogoGog24]

I have to wonder if when Stassi said Katie was her last connection to SUR that it was meant as a euphemism for VPR. Katie is one of the remaining things that gives Stassi a storyline. Without Katie, what storyline does Stassi have? Maybe that's why she is hanging around with Kristina and that other couple so much. She feels like she needs some kind of connection to SUR in order to remain relevant to the show. What she doesn't realize is that even if she remains friends with anyone who works there, it still doesn't make her relevant at all. And yeah that scene of her talking about how hard she worked followed by an awkward silence was hella awkward.

 

It goes back to what Lisa said about Stassi. She wants followers, not friends. Even Kristina said she could see Katie's point of view in the situation and did not immediately just take Stassi's side in the matter. I don't know if Stassi acts this way for a storyline/producer driven, or if she really has this type of mentality. But if it's the latter, man that's sad and pathetic. It's like what a middle schooler would do. I don't know how or why she has this unrealistic view of how her "friends" should act. 

 

At this point, I believe 90% of this show is scripted. We have no actual proof FI Tom slept with that chick in Miami, we were only told so. For all we know, that whole storyline is scripted and that is why they're bringing the girl to LA the next episode for the big "reveal" in front of Ariana. For all we know, Ariana and Tom aren't even a real couple. There's so many things that could be scripted and that's why there's really no point in trying to see the logic in any of it or why the characters (yes, they're characters) do or say the things they do. It is just purely fun entertainment and that's it. For all we know, it's all or mostly fake. All I know is that, real or not, it's fun to watch. I don't look too deeply into anything they do because we have no idea what is true and it takes the fun out of just watching this hot mess burn.

 

Peter and Vail's date was one of the best parts of the whole episode. Peter bragging about how he woos a woman by staring deeply into her eyes. Cuts to Peter staring creepily at Vail and Vail looking creeped out. I'm personally not a fan of women who lead men on though. Yes maybe a guy like Jax deserves a taste of his own medicine (maybe not Peter though), but after a point I think it is rude to intentionally flirt with someone and then pretend you didn't mean it that way and act like they're stupid for thinking you were into them. It's a very high school thing to do and it's something only insecure women do to validate the fact they're still pretty and can get all the guys. IMO a secure woman wouldn't do things like that in order to feel like she's still got it. Then again, it could be all for the storyline. I believe Vail is smart enough to know what will get her screen time on this show. I wouldn't be surprised if once she found out she was going to be on the show that she went back and watched every episode and really studied it to find out how to fit in and what would get her screen time. I can picture her being savvy that way.

[phoenix780]

At this point, I believe 90% of this show is scripted. We have no actual proof FI Tom slept with that chick in Miami, we were only told so. For all we know, that whole storyline is scripted and that is why they're bringing the girl to LA the next episode for the big "reveal" in front of Ariana. For all we know, Ariana and Tom aren't even a real couple. There's so many things that could be scripted and that's why there's really no point in trying to see the logic in any of it or why the characters (yes, they're characters) do or say the things they do. It is just purely fun entertainment and that's it. For all we know, it's all or mostly fake. All I know is that, real or not, it's fun to watch. I don't look too deeply into anything they do because we have no idea what is true and it takes the fun out of just watching this hot mess burn.

 

 

A decade or so ago there was an amazing stupid little soap called "Passions," and people used to complain about how the characters- particularly the women- were totally unrealistic because they were so shallow, one-note, and often obsessed with men who were a little bit...stupid.  I always thought it was fun, though, especially the villains and their overly-complicated plots to mess with relationships.  So when I watch this show...it's a happy flashback, and I feel like that writer was a little vindicated.

 

But tying back to that quote- it could well be scripted. It feels like leftover scripts from that show (the only difference, really, is that instead of monologues they bring in some random people to have conversations and introduce plot points, like the comic, or Stassi's "friends").  And, I also don't give a damn.  It's absurd and hilarious in a way that simultaneously can't be real and can't be fake.  

 

I think my favorite part was how joyful Kristen was about the girl from Miami.  Although the super-dramatic lunch, with the former best friend emerging triumphantly from the shadows as the other one wiped away a tear, was also fun to watch.  

 

Wish this was on every night for 30 minutes or so.  It's a really good way to wipe out the stress of the day.

[beaker73]

So is white eyeliner a big thing now or is it just Stassi? When she was wiping her eyes in disbelief that Katie was no longer obeying her commands, all I saw was a shit-ton of white eyeliner gunked up in the corners of her eyes. WTF?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Stassi looked like Tamra 2.0 in that scene--a nasty bitch with bad eyeliner who can't cry.

[Elizabeth]

I think this episode is a transition for Stassi leaving after this season {or even for the rest of this season}. Didn't someone mention that Lisa said on WWHL that Stassi is done? Why would Lisa even want her on this show after all the trash talking she has done about Lisa and SUR?

 

I loved that Tom Schwartz wrote in his Bravo blog that Stassi has been dressing like a 40-year-old. Do y'all think he reads here? I guess it's just that blatant how horrible she has been dressing this season - it makes what she said when showing off her necklaces even funnier! How everyone at SUR just thought she had been putting on cute outfits and living off her dad. That was first-season Stassi, not this boring, dressing like a grandmother Stassi!

 

Sorry Katie, but I think Tom Schwartz full-out cheated on you, and that is what is "weighing heavily on his mind {per his blog}. I have a feeling that episode is coming up... calling it now!

Edited January 21, 2015 by Elizabeth

[sunrisepink]

Don't think this had anything to do with our chucklefucks.  I can't even imagine Greg having anything to do with the chucklefucks. 

 

This gave me a laugh - the word collectively being used to describe the whole cast.

 

For some reason Peter has always been the only one I respected out of this group so it makes me feel bad to see him torn down by Jax (of all people!) and Vail. Although I agree that the "staring them in the eyes" thing was pretty funny. I thought the whole thing was a set-up for them to become a couple because they actually seem like a good match but when she started taking jabs at him on the date I realized it was going in the opposite direction. It was especially heinous when she went back to Sur and told Katie that Peter talked about all the women he had dated in the past...dude, you left out the part where YOU ASKED! Ugh.

[Granimal]

"Blackouts are God's way of saying, 'Dont worry about it."

 

That's a great motto for a self-described "former addict"! Not to be putting Vail into a box or anything, but after disclosing to her boss (on camera) that she used to "use hardcore drugs," she is now acting the part of someone who gets so blackout drunk that she may or may not have had sex with Jax? Either Vail has zero self-awareness or this is bad(genius) scripting!

 

And as for Peter, I was just as shocked by his dirty apartment and stained sheets as the rest of you were! And did he really have no bed-frame? What is the trend with having your mattress on the floor these days? But cheers for having a flat iron (and condoms)! VPR priorities.

 

Really? Kristen's friend has a comedy routine based around Jax? Not a cute look. She's either trying to piggyback off of the popularity of VPR or obsessed with her ex. Knowing that she's friends with Kristen, we can assume both of these things to be true.

 

Dying when Kristen said that "Miami girl" was flying to LA to confront Tom. This shit makes no sense! None! Until the previews, I fully expected Kristen to walk into SUR with a wig and sunglasses next week playing the part of "Miami girl." Now that I see that "Miami girl" is a real non-Kristen person I'm just confused. Why does Miami girl feel the need to fly to LA and confront Tom about having sex with her? Is she pregnant? I know that in reality the producers and/or Kristen paid for her ticket and put her up to this, but in what world do you have sex with someone once on a vacation and that person shows up at your work angry that you've denied hooking up with them? Has this ever happened to anyone?

 

Poor DJ Muppet Baby James! He looked annoyed and worried for Kristen's mental health. Did he tell Kristen that her obsession with Tom was getting creepy or did I just imagine that? IA he is looking better as time goes on (a rarity on this show).

 

Loved everything about Katie telling off Stassi!

 

If this show's last episode is anything like the last episode of The Hills I will be pissed!

Edited January 21, 2015 by Granimal

[bosawks]

I think the worst thing about Peter's apartment, for me, is that I still think it is one of the cleaner ones.......

[fliptopbox]

It is kind of sad that Jax has a cleaner apartment than Peter, and we only saw Peter's bedroom and bathroom. But I think first prize in SUR apartment cleanliness goes to DJ Muppet. Have we seen Kristen's apartment this season? Does she live with Muppet? I kind of doubt it, since his place looks like it would smell nice. It's odd, I am starting to kind of like him. I really hope we have a huge Muppet/Kristen blow out. Maybe when Miami chick visits? But really, who convinces a random hookup chick to fly across the country just to confront someone they slept with while on vacation? Obviously Bravo is paying, but still. That's a lot of money over confronting a one night stand....and really why should Miami girl even care? It's not like she knows Kristen, beyond this incident. There's no "chicks before dicks" here. It's not like she's gonna start dating FI Tom....and orchestrating all this to ruin FI and Ariana's relationship isn't exactly gonna chase FI back into Kristen's open arms. Being the one who wrecks someone else's relationship doesn't usually make them turn around and love you. Even if there was a shred of a chance next episode will kill it, I am sure.

I can totally see Kristen justifying a murder as romance. "Oh baby, I killed Ariana for you. Here's her heart.." *stab!*

 

Delusional, for sure.

[Ubiquitous]

And why the implication to him that she was so drunk in Miami she didn't know what happened between her & Jax sexually?  She sure as fuck was pretty clear to us she didn't do nothin' with Jax.  More flirty bullshit?  

I think Vail said it for plausible deniability.

 

It goes back to what Lisa said about Stassi. She wants followers, not friends. Even Kristina said she could see Katie's point of view in the situation and did not immediately just take Stassi's side in the matter. I don't know if Stassi acts this way for a storyline/producer driven, or if she really has this type of mentality. But if it's the latter, man that's sad and pathetic. It's like what a middle schooler would do. I don't know how or why she has this unrealistic view of how her "friends" should act. 

Given what I've read about her and her fame-whoring ways, I am pretty sure she really is like that.

 

A decade or so ago there was an amazing stupid little soap called "Passions," and people used to complain about how the characters- particularly the women- were totally unrealistic because they were so shallow, one-note, and often obsessed with men who were a little bit...stupid.  I always thought it was fun, though, especially the villains and their overly-complicated plots to mess with relationships.  So when I watch this show...it's a happy flashback, and I feel like that writer was a little vindicated.

Gawd, how I miss that stupid show!

 

I loved that Tom Schwartz wrote in his Bravo blog that Stassi has been dressing like a 40-year-old. Do y'all think he reads here? I guess it's just that blatant how horrible she has been dressing this season - it makes what she said when showing off her necklaces even funnier! How everyone at SUR just thought she had been putting on cute outfits and living off her dad. That was first-season Stassi, not this boring, dressing like a grandmother Stassi!

Yeah, she even said that's what she does!

[psychoticstate]

Until the previews, I fully expected Kristen to walk into SUR with a wig and sunglasses next week playing the part of "Miami girl."

 

 

Holy crap, that might be the greatest entertainment EVER. 

 

But I think first prize in SUR apartment cleanliness goes to DJ Muppet. Have we seen Kristen's apartment this season? Does she live with Muppet? I kind of doubt it, since his place looks like it would smell nice. It's odd, I am starting to kind of like him.

 

 

Clearly the laws of physics don't apply to Muppet because he's actually getting MORE attractive after being around Cigarette Sally for a while.  I would expect her fucknuttery to rub off on him and make him appear grimy, greasy and dirty but it's apparently having the opposite effect.  (See how both Kristen and FI's appearances improved after their break-up).

 

Since "officially" being with FI, the Nugget's looks haven't changed but her head has gotten awfully big.

 

I don't ever need to hear about Jax's nuts, good or bad.  Ever.  They can join Katie's formerly orange hair off in Never-Never Land.

 

What I really want to know is where has the Chunky Sweater been hiding?  And will we be treated to more parking lot fights between the guys where they rip off their shirts in preparation? 

Edited January 21, 2015 by psychoticstate

[ghoulina]

"Blackouts are God's way of saying, 'Dont worry about it."

 

I wonder if the loved ones of someone killed by a drunk driver would agree. 

 

Vail is an idiot. 

 

 

Now that I see that "Miami girl" is a real non-Kristen person I'm just confused. Why does Miami girl feel the need to fly to LA and confront Tom about having sex with her? Is she pregnant?

 

Maybe in her sad, little world Tom is some kind of lustworthy celebrity and it MUST be known that he did, indeed, have sex with her. 

[OnceSane]

A famewhore's gotta do what a famewhore's gotta do…

My $.02. He'll, if they actually banged, she may have hoped it would lead to this exact walk-on role. But my guess is that this shit be fake for storyline purposes.

But if this is some swerve and Ariana put the Miami chick up to this just to prove how far Kristen would go (and how crazy she is)…I will be in almost awe. That would be some brilliant television. Kristen thinks she's won, she'll split up Tom and Ariana, and get her man back. Instead, The Master of the Flat-Iron and Madame Smuggerton are stronger than ever, laughing at Kristen's attempted manipulation.

And then shit gets real when Kristen truly loses her mind (we've only seen the warm-up so far).

Yeah, I'd be pretty down for that. Though I worry we might see an on-camera murder.

[walnutqueen]

I'm hoping for an on camera straightjacket and a 5150.  :-)

[psychoticstate]

If the majority of this season is any indication, the reunion promises to be epic. 

 

I hope Kristen majorly loses her shit and Scheana winds up with a nonfatal, non-dangerous injury (maybe she'll get an eyelash in her eye.)  Will StASSi even be brought out?  Do we care?  Bring out a big tray of brownies for Schwartz.  Katie and Scheana can sign a friendship contract on stage (thank you, Cynthia Bailey.)  Bring on the subpar San Diego chick that Jax allegedly railed in the bathroom.  Bring back Laura Leigh for her commentary and then bring out Carmen and Tiffany and let them fight to see who can rip off Jax' good nut.   Let the Nugget find out that FI may have cheated on her with someone at the Four Queens.  Let FI have started his own FI business. 

[ihartcoffee]

I couldn't picture how Greg Plitt would in any way fit in with da chucklefucks, but thanks, Heebie, for putting out this scenario cuz it gave me a hearty chuckle.  My theory is Andy did like Greg (who could blame him?) and was looking for some way to get him on Bravo.  The prob was where would he fit.

 

Certainly putting Greg on VPR woulda provided us with endless giggles.  I mean, Jax seems deluded enough into thinking he's got a great body, but standing next to Greg certainly woulda shaken him to his core (whatever core there is).  And how would FI have dealt with being next to someone so hot?  Fallen on his knees or just cried?  

 

Well, my thought on Greg is that his life was so consumed by his dedication (obsession in my eyes) to fitness, it curtailed what he could do with most of his time.  Sure, he'd jump at a chance to be on any reality show, especially this one.  But it woulda been a stretch to fit him into the script.  Would he have had time in his life to actually work any type of job at SUR?  Given his lifestyle & diet constraints, would he ever in a zillion years have worked at a place like SUR?  Doesn't seem believable.  Ah, but then again, who cares?  The contrast between him & da chucklefucks in looks alone woulda been awesome.

http://m.newser.com/story/201578/bravo-star-trying-to-outrun-train-when-he-was-killed.html

This article says he was trying to out run the train? My apologies if this has been discussed. Crazy if it's true.

[bblancobrnx]

Once again Jax proves what an idiot he truly is. Thinks the only part of a "relationship" that means anything is sex.

"Carmen is the best sex I have ever had, and from what she has told me, I am the best that she's ever been with, so why would she want to date other people? I just don't get it."

Well, probably because everything besides the sex is absolutely awful and you skeeve her out. It just goes to show yet again how truly juvenile and shallow Jax truly is. He has no idea what makes a real relationship. Everything is only about sex with him

[SuzWhat]

It is indeed a sad state of affairs when Jax has the nicest apartment of these chuckleheads (TM someone up thread).    Stassi's is nice but that is fake.    James's apartment seems to consist of the bedroom only.  Flat iron Tom's is sad.   Kate and Schwartz's is sad.   Petah's is gross.

[HouseofBeck]

Once again Jax proves what an idiot he truly is. Thinks the only part of a "relationship" that means anything is sex.

"Carmen is the best sex I have ever had, and from what she has told me, I am the best that she's ever been with, so why would she want to date other people? I just don't get it."

Well, probably because everything besides the sex is absolutely awful and you skeeve her out. It just goes to show yet again how truly juvenile and shallow Jax truly is. He has no idea what makes a real relationship. Everything is only about sex with him

I was wondering if Carmen would say the same about him on her own. But dude has to have some good moves, right? Or Bravo pays a LOT for some of these girls to keep coming back.

Also had flashbacks to the "best sex I've ever had" line about Laura Leigh and the "best sex I've ever had" coerced line about Stassi. Consistent vocab, at least.

Edited January 22, 2015 by HouseofBeck

[bblancobrnx]

Well, I don't think you.can have as much sex as Jax does and not be pretty good at it!

[OnceSane]

Well, I don't think you.can have as much sex as Jax does and not be pretty good at it!

Yes. Yes, you can.

When you depend on your crabs to tickle her g-spot instead of doing it yourself, you may be crap at putting it down.

[walnutqueen]

Well, I don't think you.can have as much sex as Jax does and not be pretty good at it!

 

Unfortunately, you can.  Quantity does not correlate with quality.  Take it from one who knows ... [/small, sad voice]

[JenE4]

Yes. Yes, you can.

When you depend on your crabs to tickle her g-spot instead of doing it yourself, you may be crap at putting it down.

I am SO glad that I'm working from home today, because not only did I LOL, but I gaffawed! (But, yay, I finished all my work early so I'm watching this episode now!)

[MZ30958]

It's so irritating to hear Stassi say "I design statement necklaces" when for the past seasons we've heard her say HER MOM designs statement necklaces.  And she talks about how much she looovvvveeeesss statement necklaces in her TH and that at least if someone's not staring at your boobs they are looking at your necklace ... but says this while she isn't wearing "her" statement necklace, with her ta-ta's hanging out.  

[JenE4]

Vail is completely the female Jax the way she tells one person something and then tries to play it off like the complete opposite happened and the person is crazy for hearing what she said the first time. At first when she was doing this TO Jax in previous episodes, who cares. But the way she was fawning over Peter rubbing his muscles and then practically laughing in his face that he thought his coffee date was a wine date and not just a "meeting"--what does a hostess need to have a meeting about? And then all of the questions she was asking HIM about who he's dated at SUR, she's laughing back at Katie as if he's volunteering this information himself to just make Peter look like an idiot. I mean, the poor guy already looked silly enough with his shirts that are two sizes too small as if he suddenly had a huge growth spurt, but his mom's like, "I just bought you these new school clothes in September! Let's try to get another couple of months out of them in case you keep growing." Anyway, I can't decide whether I'm starting to not like Vail, or Andy Cohen is a genius for hiring a soap opera star to play the role of the vampy villainess who breaks hearts and confidences.

[walnutqueen]

It's so irritating to hear Stassi say "I design statement necklaces" when for the past seasons we've heard her say HER MOM designs statement necklaces.  And she talks about how much she looovvvveeeesss statement necklaces in her TH and that at least if someone's not staring at your boobs they are looking at your necklace ... but says this while she isn't wearing "her" statement necklace, with her ta-ta's hanging out.  

 

There's a statement Stassi's necklaces are making, but even I am too refined to repeat it here.  ;-)

[The Mighty Peanut]

Unfortunately, you can. Quantity does not correlate with quality. Take it from one who knows ... [/small, sad voice]

You're not alone. I've also been traumatized underwhelmed by men suffering from delusions of magical dick grandeur.

Edited January 23, 2015 by The Mighty Peanut

[katbirdy]

A funny moment that I noticed on my second watch was when Jax and Carmen were lunching, Jax said something so dumb, even for him.

He was asking Carmen to think about being his date for the wedding and he points to his giant Frankenstein noggin and says, " Let it fonder "

Gold, Jaxy, gold.

[LibertarianSlut]

I found Vail to be shady from the jump, for all the reasons stated above, and also because she seemed to be a good 10 years older than the rest of this crew. I finally broke down and checked her work on IMDB, which states that she's been working since 1973, which makes her at least 40 when this show was in production (then again, IMDB says that VPR is a half hour long, and that Scheana is 5'5" and 115 lbs, which is laughable).

Not that there is anything wrong with being older per se, but I think it makes it even more pathetic that she's trying to enmesh herself with these people than if she were, say, James's age. I mean, a sit-down with Stassi? Going cross country for a near-stranger's 20-something bachelorette party? Please. People call out Jax all the time for being 35 and still playing this game. Is it my imagination, or did Vail herself even make a remark? So, what's good for the goose...I know this is mostly fiction, but I really think girl friend needs to get some pride, rather than attach her real name to a reality show where she's playing with immature, dysfunctional, developmentally-arrested 20-somethings...and now she's getting sloppy and swapping tales about their bad behavior (see Peter)? Girl, have a seat.

[zoeysmom]

Stassi whining about Lisa.  http://www.wetpaint.com/stassi-schroeder/articles/2015-01-19-lisa-vanderpump-moody-brandi-glanville?postId=603824&socialTitle=&utm_campaign=vrl&utm_medium=tw-wetpainttv&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_term=1421707887857044

 

Is that even Stassi in the picture?

[OnceSane]

She looks like she's the same age as Brandi…not a good look, StASSi.

[yourmomiseasy]

But wait, is 32 too old to flirt?  Somebody did NOT give me that memo.  I was single when I was 32 and out there flirting my ass off.  Ahh well. 

 

32 isn't too old for flirting, it's too old for the juvenile shit she's putting out there.  I've seen tween girls that were less obvious and eyeroll inducing.  Also, I was going to say there's no way she's only 32, but cocaine...  I think the observations other posters have made about her being insecure and seeking validation in the form of male attention are probably pretty correct.

 

 

More and more as I watch these people who are my age or horrifically even older and living the life the guy who moves out to live with a bud while delivering pizzas for rent and free grub so he can otherwise play video games all day, sleep to 2 pm and basically think he is living the life at the age of nineteen, I'm amused and find it not only a huge ego boost at where I am.  But I also wonder in L.A. just how many Peters Jaxs and Toms there are who refuse to give up and just settle in low rent scuzzy apts that will never be a home or have a true life.  Because this small representation clearly thinks via this show they have it made.   That is what makes watching this a save from being so sad and pathetic as a whole.  They go to San diego to mingle in a pool smaller than mine with a broken down sound system some skanky babes and buds who the fuck knows what is in the water and these people think they are living Large! 

I live in LA and am currently unemployed.  I'm old (Jax's age) and unlike these chucklefucks have a real career, but I got a sweet severance package so I'm bumming around and doing charity work for a little while (and also spending way too much time watching VPR, obviously).  Anyway, I always think that now that I can go out and about on weekdays instead of weekends it is going to be magical and not full of people, but it's worse and I'm constantly thinking "who are all these people and why are they not at work?"  I think there are a lot of people working non-office hours in LA.  A good portion are probably aging out while waiting for their big break, but there are a lot of people in LA period, so I don't think it is actually a large percentage of the people here, even though it sometimes seems like it.  As for the shitbox apartments, housing in LA is expensive, all types, especially if you want to live in WeHo as it appears they all do.  My house is a shithole in a marginal neighborhood and it's worth over a half mil.  If I was a server/struggling mactor, there's no way I could have bought it and I would have rather rented in a nicer neighborhood than purchased a house in an even shittier one than I'm in.  I mean seriously, saving up a 6 figure down payment is hard and mortgage payments are high, who wants to do all that to live in constant fear of crime?

 

http://m.newser.com/story/201578/bravo-star-trying-to-outrun-train-when-he-was-killed.html

This article says he was trying to out run the train? My apologies if this has been discussed. Crazy if it's true.

 

I knew it was going to be something ridiculous when I saw on the news that they were filming near railroad tracks without permits, but this just blows my mind.  What a senseless and stupid way to die.

[fliptopbox]

Kristen and her delusions really know no bounds. I don't understand how she thinks she is going to "get Ariana out of the picture" short of murdering her. Even if Ariana were to not work at SUR anymore she's still alive, and living in LA. Getting someone fired from their job won't break up a relationship and I'm thinking FI would still date her even if she worked at a different bar. Also, chances are after next episode Kristen won't be working at SUR either.

Edited January 25, 2015 by fliptopbox