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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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I sent you all a private message..  

Wanted to make sure you knew....

Did you get it?

 

My mom doesn't really understand the point of texting.  If you don't write back in.like 5 minutes even if it's the middle of the day, she thinks I either didn't get the message or I'm ignoring her  

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I'm very conflicted about You've Got Mail.  I don't like that the big bookstore took over her store, but she ended up working in the children's department?  I also don't like that they were cheating on other spouses/SOs at the beginning.  Now the movie is so dated because even many of the large book stores have been put out of business by Amazon (all of Borders and many Barnes and Noble branches).

On the other hand, I love the ending, and it makes me cry.  The place where they meet at the end is in the park just a few blocks from where I live, and I walk my dog there all the time.

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She didn't go to work for Fox Books.  There was a scene with her in the Fox bookstore, and she was helping both a customer and the Fox employee find the "shoe" books, but she was just visiting the store.  She was not working there.  I don't think it was ever explicitly stated what she was going to do, but writing children's books was a definite possibility.

I do hate that her store closed, but she didn't close it voluntarily.  Fox Books, with lower overhead and discounts, took her customers and put her out of business.  

 

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Pet peeve today - weather.  So it's supposed to go up to 16c today and it was -1 first thing this morning.  So spring has sprung?  Not so fast.  Tomorrow it's back down to 4c.  Which isn't terrible but it sure ain't 16!  Every year this happens and every year it bugs me - someday as god is my witness I am going to move somewhere that doesn't have these extremes!

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An end to the saga of the instant message/email peeve of earlier this week - and, it raised 2 more pet peeves! I received the email this morning and it asked me 

  • to change a company policy for that person and their colleagues - no
  • who to talk to in IT about a couple of email problems - email the help desk

I’m sure my answers aren’t satisfying to the person who asked, but I did get satisfaction out of my answers. 

Edited by MargeGunderson
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On 3/29/2022 at 1:21 PM, MargeGunderson said:

People who IM me to tell me they are sending me an email. I don’t even know where to start with that. 

I can see this being okay in certain situations (where it wouldn't just be annoying.)

Like maybe if my boss tells me to "Send so and so an email and copy me on it."  If so and so is somebody I have a good working relationship with, I think it would be appropriate to let that person know ahead of time.  

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Songs that never end!  I've got the oldies station on and they just played Ramblin' Man.  I really like this song,  Actually quite a lot but dear god were they paid by the note?  It just went on and on and on at the end.  Very 70s of them I guess.

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15 hours ago, SusanM said:

Songs that never end!  I've got the oldies station on and they just played Ramblin' Man.  I really like this song,  Actually quite a lot but dear god were they paid by the note?  It just went on and on and on at the end.  Very 70s of them I guess.

Never been a real Beatles fan (gasp!), but Hey Jude makes me stabby.

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(edited)
2 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Never been a real Beatles fan (gasp!), but Hey Jude makes me stabby.

I don’t like the Beatles. Please don’t throw things at me. My related peeve is people that insist that I must like some Beatles song. Nope.

Edited by MargeGunderson
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14 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Never been a real Beatles fan (gasp!), but Hey Jude makes me stabby.

 

12 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

I don’t like the Beatles. Please don’t throw things at me. My related peeve is people that insist that I must like some Beatles song. Nope.

The Beatles are "safe". If you ask someone what kind of music they like & they say they like The Beatles, it means either they're embarrassed by the music they like, or they just don't have a clue what kind of music they like.

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9 hours ago, GaT said:

The Beatles are "safe". If you ask someone what kind of music they like & they say they like The Beatles, it means either they're embarrassed by the music they like, or they just don't have a clue what kind of music they like.

Or it's possible they like The Beatles.

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I'm not of the Beatles generation and when I was in high school (the era of Alanis et al) I was always nervous about letting people know what I liked - country (and Broadway).  I think people kind of figured it out, but it was the source of embarrassment!  The other big thing among the kids was Canto-pop (for those who speak/understand Cantonese or have family members who do, anyway).  It was harder to reveal that to THEM because I was once called "white-washed" by another girl.  I eventually gravitated to Lilith Fair type music so it was easier towards the end of high school.  It was a major stressor for me.  

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2 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

People love to hate on pop music, but it makes me more happy than anything. 

I think people go through stages with this.  I had a friend who was a huge Donny Osmond fan in high school.  Like went to every concert she could go to in the US and Canada (and England!) kind of fan.  I met up with her in university and when I brought up her Donny Osmond fandom she almost died of embarassment and quickly shushed me in case anyone in a 5 mile radius had overheard me,  Fast forward to recent years and she's proud of her Donny love and even went to Las Vegas with fellow fans to see Donny and Marie when they were playing there.

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My pet peeve regarding music is gatekeeping.  The whole, “You can’t be a true fan of x, y, or z music because ______” (insert arbitrary criteria). What? Who cares if I am a fan of a certain type of music or a particular band/artist? Or if I am not familiar with everything about a music genre or artist? I like what I like. 

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51 minutes ago, Adiba said:

Or if I am not familiar with everything about a music genre or artist? I like what I like. 

Yes!  I like quite a few musicals (only a handful of movie musicals, though), but I am not at all a student of musical theatre.  That doesn't mean I can't discuss what I liked and disliked about an individual play or film just because I can't put it in the context of the composer's entire oeuvre.

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My peeve about music, acting, painting, writing etc is when someone says "Oh they are so overrated".  Well how do you actually know that?

I remember someone saying that to my grade 11 English teacher about Shakespeare.  Oh my she just demolished him!  As I recall her main point it was perfectly fine not to like something but unless you have a lot more credentials under your belt than a cursory reading of Hamlet (as was the case here) you don't get to call the author overrated! 

I am betting he never went on to embrace the bard but he probably also picked his audience - or certainly his words - with a bit more care going forward.

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5 minutes ago, SusanM said:

My peeve about music, acting, painting, writing etc is when someone says "Oh they are so overrated".  Well how do you actually know that?

I don't like that one, either, Mainly because too many people confuse "I personally don't like this" with "They're overrated". The two things are not one and the same. 

Either that, or they're trying to sound so cool and "above it" by dismissing this really popular thing everyone likes, and act like they're the first person ever to make this oh-so-daring statement. Wow, you don't like this popular thing? That's nice, want a cookie? 

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4 hours ago, SusanM said:

I think people go through stages with this.  I had a friend who was a huge Donny Osmond fan in high school.  Like went to every concert she could go to in the US and Canada (and England!) kind of fan.  I met up with her in university and when I brought up her Donny Osmond fandom she almost died of embarassment and quickly shushed me in case anyone in a 5 mile radius had overheard me,  Fast forward to recent years and she's proud of her Donny love and even went to Las Vegas with fellow fans to see Donny and Marie when they were playing there.

I bet she saw Joseph many, many times then (I saw him as Joseph at one of the Toronto stops back in the 90s)

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I agree more or less regarding calling things overrated, but there's no need to keep putting some classics on a pedestal as if they can't be touched. Citizen Kane, Godfather and Watchmen are overrated and I will gladly die on that hill. 

Now, where's my cookie?

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1 hour ago, JustHereForFood said:

I hate it when I accidentally inhale some food or drink. I have inhaled some coffee about half an hour ago and I'm still coughing, worse than when I had covid.

Still coughing? If so I’d see a doctor.  You can actually end up with bronchitis, or pneumonia after aspirating.

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16 hours ago, SusanM said:

I think people go through stages with this.  I had a friend who was a huge Donny Osmond fan in high school.  Like went to every concert she could go to in the US and Canada (and England!) kind of fan.  I met up with her in university and when I brought up her Donny Osmond fandom she almost died of embarassment and quickly shushed me in case anyone in a 5 mile radius had overheard me,  Fast forward to recent years and she's proud of her Donny love and even went to Las Vegas with fellow fans to see Donny and Marie when they were playing there.

I have a similar thing, but I'm not going to say who it is.  Or I really will die of embarrassment.

 

14 hours ago, SusanM said:

I remember someone saying that to my grade 11 English teacher about Shakespeare.  Oh my she just demolished him!  As I recall her main point it was perfectly fine not to like something but unless you have a lot more credentials under your belt than a cursory reading of Hamlet (as was the case here) you don't get to call the author overrated! 

I liked the Shakespeare that we had to read in school (except Romeo and Juliet), but I can't read it without a teacher spoonfeeding me explanations.  So, my pet peeve is that I'm not smart.  Which probably is what led to me picking substandard teen idols.

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On 4/3/2022 at 11:04 AM, rcc said:

Not necessarily a big Beatles fan but I do love Here Comes The Sun.

You and me both, it brightens my day any time I hear it. 

19 hours ago, Annber03 said:

I don't like that one, either, Mainly because too many people confuse "I personally don't like this" with "They're overrated". The two things are not one and the same. 

Truth. 

7 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Still coughing? If so I’d see a doctor.  You can actually end up with bronchitis, or pneumonia after aspirating.

This is touching on my Pet Peeve from last week:  

I had both my physical and my annual Gyn appointment in  the same week. Both of these doctors are female and I have been seeing both of them for 10+ years. I am, at least medically speaking, pretty simple, I can count on one hand how many times I've seen them outside of my annuals. Both appointments went fine, but I was bothered by how impersonal these things usually are. Like I am a blank slate and they just fill in the blanks with all the questions they are required to ask but they don't really talk to you, they just talk at you.

I am dealing with some post-menopausal weight gain and was hoping at least one of them could offer some medical or personal insight on how to combat it. Nope. My GP referred me to a nutritionist. My Gyn told me I looked great for 54. Gee thanks. I almost always leave my appointments  with the feeling that I was just patient #15 of the day. I guess I should be thankful I'm healthy enough to not have to worry about anything serious.

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I am dealing with some post-menopausal weight gain and was hoping at least one of them could offer some medical or personal insight on how to combat it. Nope. My GP referred me to a nutritionist. My Gyn told me I looked great for 54. Gee thanks. I almost always leave my appointments  with the feeling that I was just patient #15 of the day. I guess I should be thankful I'm healthy enough to not have to worry about anything serious.

I've been reading a series of articles that explain that many hospitals and clinics are being taken over by private equity firms whose only goal is to generate as much profit as possible.

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35 minutes ago, BexKeps said:

Gee thanks. I almost always leave my appointments  with the feeling that I was just patient #15 of the day.

I've had the same GP since we moved to our area when our kids were small.  And even after all this time I feel like we've never really made a personal connection with him at all.  He's been there for me when I've had health issues in the past, as a doctor I have no complaints.  But as a person?  Cold fish.  I guess this shouldn't matter but I have been fooled by TV shows where people seem to develop warm, personal relationships with their family doctors.  Once again it seems TV has misled me!

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(edited)

Inefficient meetings at work. I have a daily meeting with my team that’s supposed to be a 15-minute check in, and lately I’ve been turning my camera off because my team has spent several minutes discussing cars and TV (among other things) as the clock is approaching 15 minutes. I think it’s extremely rude. If you want to talk about what TV shows you’re watching, use the appropriate Slack channel or set up a virtual happy hour or something. 

I’m not opposed to some small talk but I wish it weren’t dominating long stretches of what’s supposed to be a short work-related meeting. And if people are more interested in talking about Bridgerton or what streaming services they use, maybe we don’t need a daily meeting if it’s three minutes of work talk and 10+ minutes of the mundane navel-gazing you did this week.

I just have little patience for people who don’t respect others’ time. I’m in a choir and we start practice at 7 pm. I would be peeved if it were starting at 7:20 so we could chit chat for 20 minutes every week about who watched what and what everyone did on the weekend. Trust me, my ice skating coach has been consistently late every week lately and if he weren’t leaving coaching soon anyway I’d fire him. 

Edited by Cloud9Shopper
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17 hours ago, SusanM said:

I've had the same GP since we moved to our area when our kids were small.  And even after all this time I feel like we've never really made a personal connection with him at all.  He's been there for me when I've had health issues in the past, as a doctor I have no complaints.  But as a person?  Cold fish.  I guess this shouldn't matter but I have been fooled by TV shows where people seem to develop warm, personal relationships with their family doctors.  Once again it seems TV has misled me!

@SusanM exactly, if only my life were a sitcom! My prior Gyn was the sweetest guy, he actually took the time to read my file before he walked in the room.  I was with him all through my 2nd pregnancy and he delivered my youngest daughter so he always asked about her as well as her sister. He even remembered my cats' names (must have put a note in the file) but he retired. I was looking forward to having a female Gyn but as you see, it's not that great. She is always late so my appointments always seem rushed. She's thorough, just no warm and fuzzies there. She forgot I was remarried. Sigh.

I'm not looking for a new best friend but it would be nice to have my doctor KNOW me without having to look at a piece of paper. Again, I should be thankful that I haven't had to spend a lot of time in medical buildings. 

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26 minutes ago, BexKeps said:

'm not looking for a new best friend but it would be nice to have my doctor KNOW me without having to look at a piece of paper. Again, I should be thankful that I haven't had to spend a lot of time in medical buildings. 

Welcome to modern production line medicine.  Marcus Welby (ancient TV doc reference) has left the building.

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(edited)
On 4/3/2022 at 5:14 PM, SusanM said:

I think people go through stages with this.  I had a friend who was a huge Donny Osmond fan in high school.  Like went to every concert she could go to in the US and Canada (and England!) kind of fan.  I met up with her in university and when I brought up her Donny Osmond fandom she almost died of embarassment and quickly shushed me in case anyone in a 5 mile radius had overheard me,  Fast forward to recent years and she's proud of her Donny love and even went to Las Vegas with fellow fans to see Donny and Marie when they were playing there.

Those Osmonds have some crazy non-poppy songs! My BF recently discovered this (why, I am not sure) and there is one called Crazy Horses that is just nuts, as is the video footage of them performing it.

Quote

I am dealing with some post-menopausal weight gain and was hoping at least one of them could offer some medical or personal insight on how to combat it.

I think I may be having a bit of a post-menopausal belly! Is this a thing? I hate it. Everything else is "normal," I eat well, I walk at least 25 miles per week, my clothes generally all still fit, and I have always been on the smaller side. So why is the little blubby pooch here now? Stupid! Anyway -- sorry about the rant! I hope you were able to get some satisfactory answers after dealing with a runaround. 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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10 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

I think I may be having a bit of a post-menopausal belly! Is this a thing? I hate it. Everything else is "normal," I eat well, I walk at least 25 miles per week, my clothes generally all still fit, and I have always been on the smaller side. So why is the little blubby pooch here now? Stupid! Anyway -- sorry about the rant! I hope you were able to get some satisfactory answers after dealing with a runaround. 

@TattleTeeny that  is exactly what I am dealing with! Not to get too graphic but it's a jiggle belly that came out of nowhere! On average I run at least 20 miles a week, I eat on the healthier side, rarely snack, I do have a sweet tooth but it is not out of control. I like beer and wine but again, it's not something that is consumed frequently. I don't get it. My GP told me that my BMI was fine and that my weight has been steady for years, meaning I haven't gained or lost. So where did this mushy belly come from? Everything I have read points to hormones but there doesn't seem to be much I can do other than starve myself. Being a woman can be very frustrating.

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Being a woman can be very frustrating.

YUP!

And it's not like I expect to have the exact belly I had in college -- I don't (and I was probably too skinny then anyway). But this just feels very wrong for me!

Random not very peevy peeve: One of the ads at the bottom of this page, for me, is for those sugary candy orange/lemon/lime slices (which, I don't eat now, but used to like and have always found aesthetically pleasing). But the ad is showing a black cherry one! Is that weird? It does look good, but a slice of a cherry would not look like that!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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Just now, RealHousewife said:

Wanda is a national treasure.

By far and away my favorite comedian; she has been making me laugh for about 30 years now.  You combine that much humor, intelligence, and commitment to social justice in one person, and I am guaranteed to be a fan.

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People that don't call back or email back in a responsive time period when it is an issue that requires a deadline. 

I emailed my investment advisor guy for advice on opening an IRA, and if I want to be able to contribute for 2021 has to be done by April 18 [Tax Day]. I emailed him the first time on 3/21, to account for a lot of time. He still hadn't gotten back to me within a week, so I emailed him again on 3/27 asking him to please call me. He returned my call on 3/28 and said he'd have to do some research and get back to me in 'a day or two' to set up an appointment. That was last Monday. Today is Tuesday April 5.

At this point I might as well do it myself, right? At the very least open one at a brokerage and contribute the money, and do more research to figure out what to invest it in. Yeah?

How hard can it be?

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5 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Those Osmonds have some crazy non-poppy songs! My BF recently discovered this (why, I am not sure) and there is one called Crazy Horses that is just nuts, as is the video footage of them performing it.

I think I may be having a bit of a post-menopausal belly! Is this a thing? I hate it. Everything else is "normal," I eat well, I walk at least 25 miles per week, my clothes generally all still fit, and I have always been on the smaller side. So why is the little blubby pooch here now? Stupid! Anyway -- sorry about the rant! I hope you were able to get some satisfactory answers after dealing with a runaround. 

I think I'm at the beginning of it, and I suddenly have a massive belly, that I only had with bloating before. I thought it was hormonal, plus stress and lack of sleep, and haven't been able to walk on the treadmill much, for that reason. But if some of you are running and walking for miles, it sounds like it wouldn't make a difference. :/

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I got temporarily banned from posting on another message board for swearing. Sure, it's a message board of a serious newspaper's online version so they try to be more careful about it and yes, I didn't read their terms when I signed up very recently (I only signed up because I wanted to quickly ask a question about something and then decided to stay). But I'm still pissed about it.

I am the type of person to swear very casually, not just when I'm angry but also in normal conversations, just replacing regular words for swearwords. I get that some people don't like it, but I kind of see it as a sort of double standard, when other people can say all sorts of nasty, horrible things and get away with it as long as they don't swear while doing it. Plus, I am certain that in my case the wording was very appropriate.

I am glad that this site isn't so tight about it.

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17 hours ago, Bastet said:

Just do like Wanda Sykes and name your belly roll - hers is Esther:

 

When she announced the name of her belly roll, she said its name was "Esther...Esther Roll" and I wondered if she realized who Esther Rolle was.  Esther Rolle played Florida, the housekeeper on "Maude" who eventually got her own show, "Good Times". 

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On 4/1/2022 at 7:27 PM, SusanM said:

Songs that never end! 

Gives side eye to Stevie Wonder....by the time As ends, I have to be talked out of jumping off the ledge of a high building!!

Dear Supermarket Cashiers:

Please stay focused when you’re dealing with the items on the conveyor belt!  I hate it when cashiers either talk with their co-workers or the customer before me….heiffa, your bags have been scanned and packed, now go home!

I have no problem shutting that shit down when it happens to me, the challenge is to not be pissy about it and on that I always fail, lol.

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18 hours ago, Anela said:

I think I'm at the beginning of it, and I suddenly have a massive belly, that I only had with bloating before. I thought it was hormonal, plus stress and lack of sleep, and haven't been able to walk on the treadmill much, for that reason. But if some of you are running and walking for miles, it sounds like it wouldn't make a difference. :/

I don't want to deter anyone from exercising, so please walk/run/ride, for your overall health, physically and mentally (my runs keep me sane). Who knows, you may have better luck. It angers the shit out of me that in order to have a flatter stomach I would have to eat nothing but low-carb, low sugar, give up alcohol and coffee w/creamer. Where's the fun in that, Give me a little jiggle, I don't want to be sacrificing for the rest of my life. 

:)

 

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