Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[PRgal]

 I think the problem is funding.  Schools just don't have the money to hire extra staff to help with kids who have needs.  My son is "expressively delayed" (this means he understands words, but can't/won't say them).  It's a good thing we're finding out at the age of two, because without intervention, he may have issues when he starts school.  We're working hard to build his vocabulary and I'm hoping he'll be able to put two words together by Christmas.  He can say "Mama,"* but refuses to say "Daddy" or "Dada."  Any person who isn't me is "Nay-Nay" (nay is "you" in Cantonese).  Other words include "dere" ("there"), "dee" ("this" or "tree," depending on what we're looking at), boo ("moon") and "mao" ("cat" in Cantonese).  

 

To make this legit:  Why do grandparents seem to think their grandkids are much younger?  Or can't handle certain flavours or textures?  My mom was a little surprised my son liked Indian food.  She thought that at age 2, he wouldn't be able to handle the spices.  It wasn't even a spicy dish - just a simple daal and rice.  

*Sometimes, "Mama" could refer to any woman with dark hair.  Over the weekend, he pointed to the TV and said "Mama" when Kamala Harris appeared.  Yeah, buddy, you wish!

[Katy M]

2 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't understand why anyone would think this is a good idea.   It seems like an "everyone wins a trophy just for participating, we don't want to make the children feel bad" mentality.  What happens when the kids graduate from high school?  They wouldn't be able to get into college, and they might not have the skill set for jobs that don't require a college education.  Then what? 

Theoretically, they are supposed to keep redoing the assignment/retake the test until they get a passing grade.  However, I still think that's stupid, because it teaches no accountability.

Someone posted on some website that they knew someone teaching a nursing class and she wasn't allowed to fail anyone,they had to be able to redo as often as necessary to get it right. I don't want people in charge of life or death situations taught that they get as many chances as it takes because that's not the way real life works.

Now, I don't have much of a problem with that approach in elementary school, but my friend is a high school teacher.

[Katy M]

3 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I would hope the test that is retaken isn't the exact same test.

I think it is, but I really couldn't tell you for sure.

[peacheslatour]

Quote

Theoretically, they are supposed to keep redoing the assignment/retake the test until they get a passing grade.  However, I still think that's stupid, because it teaches no accountability.

Then they get into the work force and can't understand why they keep getting fired for missing deadlines and showing up late.

[TattleTeeny]

On 11/9/2020 at 12:37 PM, peacheslatour said:

I hate all professional sports. The amount of money that goes into it is obscene.

I hate that there is a surcharge on my cable bill for sports, which no one here watches. It's not that I can't afford it, of course, but why is it there? Considering that the sports are shown on channels I already pay for, why am I paying more to watch those channels less? 

Also, regarding recordings that get screwed up because of games, why the hell can't the DVR just figure that out and adjust itself? 

[AgentRXS]

Tropical Storm Eta. This thing just won't go away. It caused major flooding here the past two days. It headed west into the Gulf and now may be turning back east. My baby is due at the end of the month, but I can go into labor any day now. Its already enough dealing with the COVID pandemic, I really would not like to have to give birth during or after a storm event. 🙄

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

There are a whole bunch of channels that I don't watch and am not too thrilled that I am paying for, but I guess having the ability to cherry pick the channels I want was never in the cards. 

Same here, I guess, as far as having a bunch I don't watch, but they're included in the package I chose to pay for. But the sports fee is on its own line in the bill, which makes it seem like its a separate entity that I could excise if I so desire. But no! To be honest, I'd be less annoyed if they just rolled that fee into the package price and I had no idea it was there. Same with all the weird fees* attached to ticket prices for shows. Don't show me them!

*The weirdest being the "print it at home" charge. Why do I pay you for that?

[Nicmar]

On 11/10/2020 at 12:25 PM, peacheslatour said:

I picked up saying veg back in the seventies in England. As in "I need to pick up some veg for dinner this evening."

I watch alot of bad British reality TV but I do hear the word Veg alot. lol 

On 11/10/2020 at 12:56 PM, icemiser69 said:

You might need a flowchart to follow this one.  I am getting lost in it and I am the one that wrote the following paragraph.  I might have to break out the sock puppets just to see if I have got this written correctly.  I have to make light of it, because those years were truly horrible and it is the only way that I can get through it.  Here it goes.

No, but I do think it is fair to penalize teachers who allow disruptive students to interfere with other students who want to learn but can't because those students are so focused on which disruptive students are going to kick their ass, knowing and being terrified that it is going to happen and even more terrified in not knowing when it is going to happen and not knowing which disruptive students are going to be involved in it.  Most importantly, teachers having no interest in stopping it from happening.

Yeah.  I was getting annoyed with that whole "veg" thing on Jamie Oliver's vegetarian series.

I am a vegetarian and most of the vegetarian cooks/chefs on television seem to annoy me.  The Jazzy Vegetarian is a bit of an odd duck. Sometimes I laugh hysterically during her show, because it is so quirky.  Unfortunately a lot of her recipes involve a Vitamix and I don't have one of those.  Even if I did, it would probably kick the electrical breakers in my kitchen.  The Jazzy Vegetarian airs on Create on Sundays. 

Vitamix is expensive... even at Costco

[Cobb Salad]

Tonight we were supposed to have an online Homeowners Association meeting.  We were notified by snail mail of the date around a month ago - along with instructions for filling out the ballot for the yearly election to fill 2 seats on the board.   Since it’s online this year it would be easy for me to attend.  So the time came, I clicked on the link and waited for them to start the meeting.  Several minutes passed then I went back to recheck the site with the link.  It had tomorrow’s date.  The letter had today’s date (correct day of week, month and day) so I’m wondering when this changed.  They didn’t notify us of any date change.  I’ll join it tomorrow but it’s annoying that this happened.  Since it’s the annual open meeting they need a quorum to hold it and stuff like a not communicated change of date doesn’t help that.  Ugh.  

[GaT]

On 11/10/2020 at 10:46 AM, annzeepark914 said:

I can't stand abbreviations as well as shortened words.

 

On 11/10/2020 at 10:49 AM, Mindthinkr said:

I think a lot of words are shortened because certain social media sites only allow so many spaces. In order to fit their thought in people use acronyms, abbreviations and emojis. 

I can't stand when someone uses both the acronym or the shortened version, & then puts the full words next to it to explain it. For example, someone will put LOL (laugh out loud). The point of the acronym is to take the place of something, not to be used in conjunction with it.

[TattleTeeny]

It's as if the Optimum heard me complaining and decided to seek vengeance. For the second week in a row, it has not recorded The Amazing Race and somehow it's also missing from the "Scheduled Recordings" list. But when I try to set it again, I cannot. Why, you ask? "Recording already scheduled." 

In an effort to not sweat the small stuff, I said to myself, "Well, I pay (exorbitantly) for OnDemand service, so I will simply watch last week's episode that way (and attempt to remember to do so going forward)!" Big fat fucking nope; it's not there yet. Stupid Optimum--do you not know there is a pandemic happening and you are all I have?!

[peacheslatour]

1 hour ago, GaT said:

 

I can't stand when someone uses both the acronym or the shortened version, & then puts the full words next to it to explain it. For example, someone will put LOL (laugh out loud). The point of the acronym is to take the place of something, not to be used in conjunction with it.

Do people still do that?

[Katy M]

My pet peeve is people who go on and on and on when I answer the phone at work.  Here is what i would like "Hi, this is so and so, from so and so and I would like to speak to so and so."  In any order.  "he's expecting my call, or I have an appointment,  or I'm returning his call" is acceptable.

That is then time for you to stop talking and then I can either say "one moment" and transfer you, or inform you that so and so isn't available and we'll go from there.

What I get is the above and I called 6 times yesterday and I want to talk about blah blah blah and I was referred by blah blah blah and I met so and so 20 years ago at such and such and I jsut think he's the greatest and what's the weather like up there?  

Yeah OK, great?  Who are you again?  I've forgotten.

[emma675]

9 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Do people still do that?

Rachael Ray. She always says "EVOO" and then immediately follows that up with "extra virgin olive oil". It drives me batty. You gave it that acronym so you wouldn't have to say it all.

[peacheslatour]

6 minutes ago, emma675 said:

Rachael Ray. She always says "EVOO" and then immediately follows that up with "extra virgin olive oil". It drives me batty. You gave it that acronym so you wouldn't have to say it all.

Oh yeah, I haven't watched her in along time. She does that, huh?

[GaT]

1 minute ago, peacheslatour said:

Do people still do that?

YES! That's why it drives me crazy. I used LOL as an example because that's the one I see all the time. Though I have to admit that someone once told me they were texting their mother or aunt or someone like that about their grandmother dying & the person kept responding & ending their comment with LOL because they thought it meant "lots of love", so I guess sometimes an explanation is good.

Here's another pet peeve. I went to my Comcast home page and right there in the entertainment section in big letters it says (don't read if you watch The Masked Singer)

Spoiler

"The Masked Singer Unmasks the Snow Owls"

Now, I understand they get the news in that section from E! Online, so it's really their headline, but that show isn't on for at least 1 1/2 hours here, so I don't appreciate being spoiled by my cable company.

[bilgistic]

We've discussed the bizarre ads on this site. Well, this is a doozy. I have seen this ad twice now and just got a screenshot. I usually read this site on my phone's Chrome browser, the cache of which I clear at least daily because of the ad bombs. (AdBlock Plus doesn't work on Chrome for Android.) I don't know what this thing is. It looks like a..."marital aid," but that doesn't make sense when one thinks about how it might function. I promise I haven't been searching for those types of things to get such an ad. This site is fairly innocent, so I can't figure out this product's purpose. Is it a...facial exerciser? I'm spoilering the ad because it's slightly disturbing. This is exactly how it appeared in my browser on this site.

 

Spoiler

 

Edited November 12, 2020 by bilgistic

[AgentRXS]

@bilgistic I complained when FB would continuously have that same ad pop up in my feed. One of my FB friends explained that it is a facial exerciser. I discussed my Bell's Palsy experience from my youth not long before that ad started to appear so it's plausible. Doesn't make it any less disturbing, though.

[bilgistic]

I wonder if a corrective device for an actual medical issue wouldn't look more...clinical.

[GaT]

2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I wonder if a corrective device for an actual medical issue wouldn't look more...clinical.

LOL, it's not an actual corrective device for a medical issue, which is why it doesn't look more clinical, it's a "face slimmer" (perfectly safe Amazon link 😁)

[bilgistic]

6 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I know where my mind went with that ad.  I was thinking of a blow up doll of some sort.  Is that really an offensive ad, or are my preconceived notions are what is causing me to think that ad is offensive?  Clearly, I read into it more than there was.  I drew conclusions before all of the facts were in.  That isn't a good thing.  There is a lesson to be taught there.

That's exactly what it's designed to look like. It's as simple as that. And yes, it's offensive because it reduces a woman to a sex object--literally making her look like one.

[BookWoman56]

15 hours ago, GaT said:

 

I can't stand when someone uses both the acronym or the shortened version, & then puts the full words next to it to explain it. For example, someone will put LOL (laugh out loud). The point of the acronym is to take the place of something, not to be used in conjunction with it.

That may be carried over from having to do so at work. In the documentation I do for a large financial institution, I am required to spell out an acronym or abbreviation on first use in the document, put the acronym or abbreviation in parentheses immediately after the full version, and then use the acronym or abbreviation for the rest of the document. Part of that practice is because we can’t assume the audience already knows what the acronym stands for, and the other reason is that different parts of the organization use the same acronym or abbreviation to refer to entirely different things. For example, there are 9 different terms/definitions listed for “AA” in our online glossary, and none of them is for Alcoholics Anonymous. Yes, social writing is very different from business writing, but some people may define acronyms without thinking about those differences. 

[Browncoat]

4 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

Three weeks ago there was so much bird activity at my bird feeders that I decided to put out three more sock feeders.  Here it is three weeks later and I don't have much bird activity at all.  Nyjer seed is very expensive.  I haven't had  to refill the feeders at all and if the birds don't start eating all of the seed soon, I am afraid that the seed will go bad due to it getting wet from all of the rain.

That flurry of activity might have been fall migrants passing through.  There are still a few lingering around here, but the winter residents are starting to move in, so maybe they'll like the seed.

[PRgal]

17 hours ago, emma675 said:

Rachael Ray. She always says "EVOO" and then immediately follows that up with "extra virgin olive oil". It drives me batty. You gave it that acronym so you wouldn't have to say it all.

Is it eee-voe, ev (like Evan)-ooooo or what?  How exactly are you supposed to pronounce it?  I usually say eee-voe, but it's probably wrong.

[emma675]

Rachael Ray literally says every letter, aka "eeee veee oh oh", and then says "extra virgin olive oil" right after. It is one of the many reasons I stopped watching anything with her in it. 

[Bastet]

Exactly -- she didn't even make an acronym out of it, just an initialism, and then she'd still go on to immediately say the whole thing every single time.  "Use a tablespoon of E-V-O-O, extra virgin olive oil ..."  Abbreviations are supposed to save time!  It was thoroughly annoying.

Edited November 12, 2020 by Bastet

[Brookside]

On 11/11/2020 at 12:15 PM, Nicmar said:

I watch alot of bad British reality TV but I do hear the word Veg alot. lol 

Vitamix is expensive... even at Costco

I'd rather hear veg than sammie.  (Actually, veg doesn't bother me at all, but sammie makes me throw up in my mouth a little.  Well not really, because "throw up in my mouth a little" is another pet peeve so I was just trying to be ironic.)

Edited November 12, 2020 by Brookside

[Nicmar]

15 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I will never understand why Rachael Ray is popular, but a lot of people must like her given that her show has been on for so long.  That said, I really can't understand why Guy Fieri is popular at all.  I can't watch anything that he is on.  They both maybe nice people, but man do they say things that annoy the crap out of me.

 

I do not like Rachel Ray quotes especially EVOO 

[SuprSuprElevated]

28 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Exactly -- she didn't even make an acronym out of it, just an initialism, and then she'd still go on to immediately say the whole thing every single time.  "Use a tablespoon of E-V-O-O, extra virgin olive oil ..."  Abbreviations are supposed to save time!  It was thoroughly annoying.

If she would just friggin say "olive oil", she would actually save a syllable from that damnable 'EVOO' nonsense.  I'll make up my own mind whether or not I choose to use extra virgin, virgin, or dried up hag olive oil, K Rachael?

[peacheslatour]

47 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I will never understand why Rachael Ray is popular, but a lot of people must like her given that her show has been on for so long.  That said, I really can't understand why Guy Fieri is popular at all.  I can't watch anything that he is on.  They both maybe nice people, but man do they say things that annoy the crap out of me.

 

Add in Ree Drummond and we'll have a Terrible TV Cooks trifecta.

[ABay]

I will say this one thing in partial defense of Rachael Ray--EVOO extra virgin olive oil and the fact I could hear her even with the TV on mute aside, she got me to start cooking again. If she can do it...

[SoMuchTV]

1 hour ago, Brookside said:

I'd rather hear veg than sammie.  (Actually, veg doesn't bother me at all, but sammie makes me throw up in my mouth a little.  Well not really. because "throw up in my mouth a little" is another pet peeve so I was just trying to be ironic.)

Ooh ooh - can I throw in vacay, delish, comfy (okay, maybe I use that one once in a while), prolly, and all the ones I'll remember after I post this...

[magicdog]

On 11/9/2020 at 3:34 PM, peacheslatour said:

Think about teachers. They are entrusted with our children's educations and basically their futures. They get paid jack.

It depends on the district they work in and if unions are involved or not.  My sister is a Special Ed teacher and they are paid fairly well for the area.  However the district (Clark County NV) is so screwed up, they create their own problems!  Many people who come here to teach (some retired from other professions but are licensed to teach) and have told me about how despite having more than one Masters (and a doctorate or two!) they are refused additional pay beyond what a teacher with one Masters Degree (in Education) is paid.  Meanwhile these people have multiple degrees in great subjects like Math, English, and various sciences.    

Which comes to my pet peeve of the hour - when outsiders are hired to do a job an insider could have done (and is likely more qualified for) and then when everything goes to Hell because the outsider couldn't handle the job, they are given a golden parachute and go screw up some other outfit!

On 11/9/2020 at 3:39 PM, RealHousewife said:

Another pet peeve of mine would be folks who think they always deserve more and that others do not!

I think in some cases it is deserved.  For example, in my job, I think I deserve more money because I produce more.  As a video editor for the AM news show, my edit partner and I are editing almost every scrap of video for a 5 hour news show non stop - even as the show is airing!  We get last minute notice on changed stories, we order video, download online stuff, edit graphics, etc. and yet those who work on the PM show by comparison, have it super easy!  They edit about 1/2 dozen videos at most (reporters on that shift often edit their own videos) and everything is tied up with a bow by the time the show airs!  

 

On 11/10/2020 at 9:55 AM, icemiser69 said:

I find it highly annoying when words are shortened.

Sometimes I don't mind it because some words or phrases need to be shortened!  Veggies was a word we used only occasionally - and that's only because "The Fonz" used it on Happy Days. 

[CrazyInAlabama]

My latest pet peeve are some of the online sales adds.   ON this screen or every other screen advertising clothing, or shoes, or other items.   Then when I click on the ad, whatever jacket or whatever they're advertising is nowhere to be found anywhere in the online site, or catalog.     It does save me money, because I don't buy some things I would like to.  

[RealHousewife]

2 hours ago, magicdog said:

It depends on the district they work in and if unions are involved or not.  My sister is a Special Ed teacher and they are paid fairly well for the area.  However the district (Clark County NV) is so screwed up, they create their own problems!  Many people who come here to teach (some retired from other professions but are licensed to teach) and have told me about how despite having more than one Masters (and a doctorate or two!) they are refused additional pay beyond what a teacher with one Masters Degree (in Education) is paid.  Meanwhile these people have multiple degrees in great subjects like Math, English, and various sciences.    

Which comes to my pet peeve of the hour - when outsiders are hired to do a job an insider could have done (and is likely more qualified for) and then when everything goes to Hell because the outsider couldn't handle the job, they are given a golden parachute and go screw up some other outfit!

I think in some cases it is deserved.  For example, in my job, I think I deserve more money because I produce more.  As a video editor for the AM news show, my edit partner and I are editing almost every scrap of video for a 5 hour news show non stop - even as the show is airing!  We get last minute notice on changed stories, we order video, download online stuff, edit graphics, etc. and yet those who work on the PM show by comparison, have it super easy!  They edit about 1/2 dozen videos at most (reporters on that shift often edit their own videos) and everything is tied up with a bow by the time the show airs!  

 

Sometimes I don't mind it because some words or phrases need to be shortened!  Veggies was a word we used only occasionally - and that's only because "The Fonz" used it on Happy Days. 

Many good points! And I obviously agree some people really do deserve more. I know what it's like to do tons of work but not get compensated for it. I just know some folks who are unfortunately more for whatever works in their best interest, not what's right. I can admit if someone deserves to make more money than I do. 

I shorten some words too, but it is a pet peeve of mine when people are overly cutesy, like everyone must have a nickname. 

[auntlada]

On 11/10/2020 at 2:43 PM, PRgal said:

 To make this legit:  Why do grandparents seem to think their grandkids are much younger?  Or can't handle certain flavours or textures?  My mom was a little surprised my son liked Indian food.  She thought that at age 2, he wouldn't be able to handle the spices.  It wasn't even a spicy dish - just a simple daal and rice. 

I vaguely remember reading when my son was small that kids can handle a lot more spices than people think they can if it's something they've always had or if it's something their mothers ate when they were pregnant/breastfeeding. I have no idea if that is true or not, but I definitely remember reading that children do not need to eat a completely bland diet.

4 hours ago, Bastet said:

Exactly -- she didn't even make an acronym out of it, just an initialism

That leads to one of my pet peeves: people who say acronym when they mean abbreviation or initialism. If it doesn't spell out a word (or something that can be pronounced as a word), it's not an acronym.

[SoMuchTV]

47 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

My latest pet peeve are some of the online sales adds.   ON this screen or every other screen advertising clothing, or shoes, or other items.   Then when I click on the ad, whatever jacket or whatever they're advertising is nowhere to be found anywhere in the online site, or catalog.     It does save me money, because I don't buy some things I would like to.  

DON’T CLICK ON THE ADS!!  Or am I just paranoid?

[Suzn]

4 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Add in Ree Drummond and we'll have a Terrible TV Cooks trifecta.

Times 1,000!  All three are unwatchable to me.  Even the name of Ree Drummond's show annoys me.  Her family is one of the richest in the state of Oklahoma and she cooks in a million dollar kitchen and is the "Pioneer" Woman!

[peacheslatour]

13 hours ago, Suzn said:

Times 1,000!  All three are unwatchable to me.  Even the name of Ree Drummond's show annoys me.  Her family is one of the richest in the state of Oklahoma and she cooks in a million dollar kitchen and is the "Pioneer" Woman!

When I first watched her show I thought it would be about growing your own food, baking bread from scratch and canning, that sort of thing. Silly me.

[KittyMom4]

1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

When I first watched her show I thought it would be about growing your own food, baking bread from scratch and canning, that sort of thing. Silly me

Lol, me too! I thought I'd be learning how to grow my own vegetables and then making meals with them. Boy was I surprised and actually disgusted when I saw her cook. Yuck. 

[theredhead77]

15 hours ago, SoMuchTV said:

DON’T CLICK ON THE ADS!!  Or am I just paranoid?

Never click on the ads, especially the junk ones from "outbrain" like this one at the bottom of my page. I have an ad blocker on my personal computer but they aren't allowed on my work computer.

Never click on the ads from Facebook, either. Or buy things from Facebook ads. I thought I had my mom trained to find what she wants on Amazon and email it to me so I can make sure it's fine and buy it for them but she went off and bought some smokeless grill off an ad from FB, turns out it was shipped from China and wasn't what was advertised. She was so upset and all I could do was reminder her this is exactly why we have this vetting process in place.

 

[SuprSuprElevated]

My newly retired husband now has little to do but peruse his phone, alternating with television viewing, and my days have become training sessions on what and what not to do/click/push/scroll. So far, we've only received one package that "was ordered by accident".  I check the bank account daily, I'm trying to be patient, as I know this was never his "thing", but his health didn't allow him to continue working, and we're left with this.  He's retired, I'm just tired, lol.

[magicdog]

17 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

My newly retired husband now has little to do but peruse his phone, alternating with television viewing, and my days have become training sessions on what and what not to do/click/push/scroll. So far, we've only received one package that "was ordered by accident".  I check the bank account daily, I'm trying to be patient, as I know this was never his "thing", but his health didn't allow him to continue working, and we're left with this.  He's retired, I'm just tired, lol.

Not the first time I've heard this from wives with retired husbands.

See if you can get him a new hobby - or rediscover an old one.  If it's something you can do together all the better!  Retirement shouldn't mean staying at home in front of the TV or computer all the time. He needs to keep his mind and body active somehow.

[TattleTeeny]

Sot of related, I guess--I think that my boyfriend sometimes thinks that me working at home, which I have been doing since March, means I am not working! Obviously, I can fit in some little housework things during the day or take an hour to run out for errands or whatever, but sometimes I think he totally forgets that I am not "free" Monday through Friday!

[Sun-Bun]

21 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

My newly retired husband now has little to do but peruse his phone, alternating with television viewing, and my days have become training sessions on what and what not to do/click/push/scroll. So far, we've only received one package that "was ordered by accident".  I check the bank account daily, I'm trying to be patient, as I know this was never his "thing", but his health didn't allow him to continue working, and we're left with this.  He's retired, I'm just tired, lol.

Sorry to hear this, @SuprSuprElevated; retirement can be a tough transition for many spouses, especially if one spouse is still steadily working.

I have similar fears of this since my husband is 15 years older than me and just several years shy of being eligible for retirement. I keep reminding him that just because he CAN retire, doesn’t mean that he SHOULD, and working longer is proven to be better for one’s brain and routine. He swears to me that he’d find a PT job doing something that he enjoys(pouring craft beer at a brewery or leading tours at the state museum as a guide), so I hope he keeps his word on that.

So has your husband mentioned the possibility of maybe working even a PT gig or volunteering somewhere a few hours a week? Because that’s sure better for you both than him sitting around at home annoying you all day. Hang in there! 

[peacheslatour]

2 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

Sorry to hear this, @SuprSuprElevated; retirement can be a tough transition for many spouses, especially if one spouse is still steadily working.

I have similar fears of this since my husband is 15 years older than me and just several years shy of being eligible for retirement. I keep reminding him that just because he CAN retire, doesn’t mean that he SHOULD, and working longer is proven to be better for one’s brain and routine. He swears to me that he’d find a PT job doing something that he enjoys(pouring craft beer at a brewery or leading tours at the state museum as a guide), so I hope he keeps his word on that.

So has your husband mentioned the possibility of maybe working even a PT gig or volunteering somewhere a few hours a week? Because that’s sure better for you both than him sitting around at home annoying you all day. Hang in there! 

My husband retired in 2010. He took a little P/T job at a model rail road store because he's into model r/r's. It wasn't long before he was managing the place and now he works six days a week. Seven during Dec. But, he retired in his fifties and won't be ready for S.S. for a couple more years. I think he'll quit then and we'll sell the house and move.

[SuprSuprElevated]

11 hours ago, magicdog said:

Not the first time I've heard this from wives with retired husbands.

See if you can get him a new hobby - or rediscover an old one.  If it's something you can do together all the better!  Retirement shouldn't mean staying at home in front of the TV or computer all the time. He needs to keep his mind and body active somehow.

I appreciate your sentiments, however he has extremely limited interests outside of his former industry/work life, and his body is rapidly breaking down to the point that physical activity is nearly out of the question.  Not the 'golden years' either of us anticipated.

Edited November 15, 2020 by SuprSuprElevated

[SuprSuprElevated]

4 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

Sorry to hear this, @SuprSuprElevated; retirement can be a tough transition for many spouses, especially if one spouse is still steadily working.

I have similar fears of this since my husband is 15 years older than me and just several years shy of being eligible for retirement. I keep reminding him that just because he CAN retire, doesn’t mean that he SHOULD, and working longer is proven to be better for one’s brain and routine. He swears to me that he’d find a PT job doing something that he enjoys(pouring craft beer at a brewery or leading tours at the state museum as a guide), so I hope he keeps his word on that.

So has your husband mentioned the possibility of maybe working even a PT gig or volunteering somewhere a few hours a week? Because that’s sure better for you both than him sitting around at home annoying you all day. Hang in there! 

You and I sound like the same person, as my hubs is also 14.5 yrs my senior.  Unfortunately, his health issues won't accomodate any sort of outside work, at all.  He had a p/t gig lined up for when he finally retired, but alas, it wasn't to be.  Don't back down with your hubs though.  As you well know, the older we get, the larger that age gap becomes, and anything you can do to keep from becoming a full time caregiver is a plus.  I'm just starting to come to terms with how things have turned out, and trying to make the best of it, for both of us. 

 

Edited November 14, 2020 by SuprSuprElevated

[CrazyInAlabama]

One thing about moving in retirement (I live on a street that's about 70% retirees) is that some people did zero research about a place before moving and settling down permanently.     Before you move to a place, look at any reviews or websites of people discussing what it's like to live there, see if the town has the amenities you need for medical, shopping, housing, etc.   Find out what all of the taxes are, including property taxes, and income taxes on pensions.     

I have a few neighbors who are very unhappy, because they moved here from another state, and didn't do any research, and hate living here because of reasons they could have easily read about online.  

See if anyone online is talking about why they left the place too (city-data forum has a very entertaining thread on The Villages, called something like 'why I left').    Don't go to a place that may not suit you long term, unless you can afford to move again.   Or rent for a year to see what the town is like year round.   Some places that are very nice during half of the year, can be overcrowded during Snow Bird season.  

Edited November 14, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[annzeepark914]

On 11/13/2020 at 12:34 PM, theredhead77 said:

Never click on the ads, especially the junk ones from "outbrain" like this one at the bottom of my page. I have an ad blocker on my personal computer but they aren't allowed on my work comput

 

I didn't click on an ad but I wrote down the name of the company (anniecloth) and went to their website via Google. I ordered a pair of casual khaki pants w/ banded ankle--very cute. I thought the company was in England. The pants were too voluminous & I wanted to return them. I was instructed to ship them to an address in China. Sheesh. I still have them. Learned my lesson.