Small Talk: About Big People

[spankydoll]

17 hours ago, editorgrrl said:

http://www.lifeandstylemag.com/posts/ruby-gettinger-now-151760

Maybe the competition will inspire Whitney to change her ways?

That is frustrating! I watched Ruby's show waiting to see some success on her part and some inspiration on mine. It was just a whine fest with dull plot lines and very little healthy lifestyle themes. Good for her! They should have her come on as Whitney's life coach.

[sainte-chapelle]

7 hours ago, Me from ME said:

Since I am without access to live viewing for a few weeks, I heartily thank you. BTW during the last episode I didn't see you all were mentioning licking armpits. Who was the lickee?

 

I'm beginning to really like Ashley. (I wasn't too sure about her when she served as Twit's personal attendant several seasons ago when our dance goddess was supposed to teach a bride some choreography for her wedding.) But with that diaper comment as well as the "to the mental hospital or the regular hospital" question I am beginning to love her. Simply stating the truth is unintentionally funny since the diva is so ridiculous in almost all aspects of her existence.

I laughed hard at the mental hospital comment and her flat 'here we go again' tone. I also laughed when she told Twit not to make the pregnancy all about her.

[editorgrrl]

On 1/20/2018 at 11:32 AM, spankydoll said:

They should have Ruby Gettinger come on as Whitney's life coach.

 

Ruby does life coaching by phone:

Quote

Ruby’s methodology: Deep listening, asking  powerful questions, helping you discover, reach and set your goals, envision your destiny, sharing of her insights, personal tips, best practices, assignments between calls, client accountability.

Ruby will use coaching  tools such as Inner Critic, Wheel of Life, Future Self, Enneagram, etc. All while in a safe, judgment free environment! Focus areas & topics are driven by the client; this is complete coaching. All topics are potentially on the table.  

 

She’s also a public speaker at “women's conferences, sports banquets, and church services.”

[Brooklynista]

Did Ruby ever discover her buried "secret" from her childhood?

[Dot]

The WaPo has an advice column called "Ask Amy." I thought this was an interesting response to a reader who apparently didn't like what Amy suggested to "Active Traveler," whatever it was. (Can't you imagine what Twit's response would be in HER advice column?)

 

Dear Amy: “Active Traveler” was upset because her obese traveling companion couldn’t partake of the full experiences during their international travel. And now Active was concerned because another obese friend wanted to join them!

She should bring both of these friends along on her next trip. Then the two obese women can entertain each other, and Active can enjoy her own more active choices.

Reader

Reader: “Active Traveler” was trying to maximize her own traveling experiences. Doubling down on this problem hardly seems like a solution to me.

[Maggienolia]

On 1/23/2018 at 9:57 AM, editorgrrl said:

 

Ruby does life coaching by phone:

 

She’s also a public speaker at “women's conferences, sports banquets, and church services.”

sports banquets?!?!?! Plus, I be interested to know if Ruby has gone through the training and certification to administer/interpret the Enneagram. 

[editorgrrl]

On 1/28/2018 at 7:50 PM, Dot said:

The WaPo has an advice column called "Ask Amy." I thought this was an interesting response to a reader who apparently didn't like what Amy suggested to "Active Traveler," whatever it was. (Can't you imagine what Twit's response would be in HER advice column?)

 

Dear Amy: “Active Traveler” was upset because her obese traveling companion couldn’t partake of the full experiences during their international travel. And now Active was concerned because another obese friend wanted to join them!

She should bring both of these friends along on her next trip. Then the two obese women can entertain each other, and Active can enjoy her own more active choices.

Reader

Reader: “Active Traveler” was trying to maximize her own traveling experiences. Doubling down on this problem hardly seems like a solution to me.

Amy Dickinson is a syndicated advice columnist. Here’s the original question:

Quote

Dear Amy: I am a single woman. I used to be a binge eater. About 10 years ago I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. I have since become fit and active.

I have a friend who is at least 200 pounds overweight. We are both retired. Last year we decided to start taking trips together. I enjoy her company, but after two trips together I am very disappointed in her as a traveling companion. She can barely walk two blocks. We mostly drive around or sit on benches near where we parked the car and watch the world go by. I am so sad and frustrated at not being able to fully explore these dream destinations. I need exercise to maintain my health and I love taking long walks in new places. In addition, watching her overeat at every meal is depressing.

If I start traveling without her, I feel like I would need to hide this part of my life from her to protect her feelings. Even worse, I have another friend, also obese, who also now wants to travel with me! How can I handle this?

—Active Traveler

Dear Active: Traveling with friends is often fraught with peril; and in this case, I feel like you are dangerously close to doubling down on the peril.

Given your condition and that of your friend, you must have realized that being incompatible travel companions was a possibility.

You shouldn't blame another person for you not having enough fun or getting enough exercise on your vacation. I've been on enough vacations (and exercise regimes) to know that there is only one person responsible for your experience: you.

If you really want to end your travels with this person, then you're going to have to be honest, adult and respectful. Acknowledge that the trips aren't quite what you envisioned and that, for now, you would like to become a solo traveler.

Whitney would accuse Active Traveler (AT) of body shaming her overweight friends, and insist that she follow their lead, watching the world go by and watching them overeat. Then she’d accuse AT of self loathing for dealing with her eating disorder, controlling her blood sugar, eating mindfully, and exercising. In Whitney’s worldview, AT must be jelly of those fabulous friends.

If I were AT, I’d explain to friend #1 that I prefer more active vacations—not lie about my travels to “protect her feelings.” Then I’d tell friend #2 the same thing, and ask if she’d be be ok with me taking long walks, exercising, and going on excursions without her. Traveling companions needn’t be joined at the hip, and separate activities would give us something to talk about at dinner.

Just because AT dislikes traveling with friend #1 doesn’t mean she wouldn’t have fun with friend # 2. But if it doesn’t work out, AT will have to have another honest conversation.

Edited January 30, 2018 by editorgrrl
Maybe friends #1 and 2 could travel together.

[auntjess]

For all cruise goers.
Just wow.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/dr-gridlock/wp/2018/02/17/a-10-day-carnival-cruise-in-the-south-pacific-descended-into-violent-anarchy/?hpid=hp_no-name_hp-in-the-news%3Apage%2Fin-the-news&utm_term=.1307b5a276f0

[LuvMyShows]

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

[Thrifty]

20 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

The thing is that there's being overweight, which is common, and being very, dangerously overweight.  I'm about 50 pounds heavy, but I can walk around pretty well, move well, and generally take care of myself.  I don't like walking up stairs and I wish I didn't get winded after only 4 flights, but it's not an insurmountable task.  I think what everyone is kind of expecting of Whitney is that she work her way down to being just somewhat overweight.  That's what most of the patients on My 600 Pound Life do.  Most of them are still a bit chubby and overweight, but they don't need nursing home level care and their weight isn't an imminent threat to their lives.

 

There was an article in The Onion once.  It said something like "Man To Get Fatter Before Losing Weight".  The man was fat, but reasoned he wasn't super fat, so he didn't need to lose weight.  I wish I could find it.

 

I basically got motivated after my pants started feeling tighter and I couldn't fit into my collection of humorous t-shirts.  Whitney needs to find her own motivation to lose weight.  It would have to come from within of course, or it would never work.

Edited March 1, 2018 by Thrifty

[3girlsforus]

8 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

I think that’s an excellent question. I am overweight and you are right. My family telling me I need to lose weight was not the trigger to motivate me to start getting my act together. In fact I’m not really sure what did it. About 6 weeks ago I decided enough was enough. I was tired of hating how I looked. So I started tracking everything I eat and walking everyday. I’m down 15lbs  I have a long way to go - about 45 more - but I’m on my way  

I don’t believe telling Whitney she needs to lose weight will do any good at all. I can’t speak for others but when I say I hope her family gives her some tough love or she needs a wake up call has to do with realizing how her weight is affecting her ability to do basic everyday things. I am overweight (and old LOL) but I can walk 3 miles. I do it almost every day. She can’t walk more than a few feet without pain. She can’t wear shoes. She can’t wipe her butt. Her skin is rubbing itself raw. That is what I think she needs to realize is going on here. In some ways Whitney is right. It doesn’t matter what number is on the scale. It matters that she can’t care for her basic needs. And that’s what her family needs to do to shock her into reality. They don’t need to say ‘lose weight’ they need to say they aren’t willing to be her caregiver anymore. If then she doesn’t do anything, well that is her choice. Glen and Babs especially really care about her of course. She’s their daughter. They’ve tried all kinds of things to help her. Whitney won’t help herself. So I think at this point the most effective  solution is to stop taking care of her. She’s 33. She should be able to do that herself. That’s what I’m looking for when I say Wakeup Call. 

[LuvMyShows]

3 minutes ago, 3girlsforus said:

I think that’s an excellent question. I am overweight and you are right. My family telling me I need to lose weight was not the trigger to motivate me to start getting my act together. In fact I’m not really sure what did it. About 6 weeks ago I decided enough was enough. I was tired of hating how I looked. So I started tracking everything I eat and walking everyday. I’m down 15lbs  I have a long way to go - about 45 more - but I’m on my way  

I don’t believe telling Whitney she needs to lose weight will do any good at all. I can’t speak for others but when I say I hope her family gives her some tough love or she needs a wake up call has to do with realizing how her weight is affecting her ability to do basic everyday things. I am overweight (and old LOL) but I can walk 3 miles. I do it almost every day. She can’t walk more than a few feet without pain. She can’t wear shoes. She can’t wipe her butt. Her skin is rubbing itself raw. That is what I think she needs to realize is going on here. In some ways Whitney is right. It doesn’t matter what number is on the scale. It matters that she can’t care for her basic needs. And that’s what her family needs to do to shock her into reality. They don’t need to say ‘lose weight’ they need to say they aren’t willing to be her caregiver anymore. If then she doesn’t do anything, well that is her choice. Glen and Babs especially really care about her of course. She’s their daughter. They’ve tried all kinds of things to help her. Whitney won’t help herself. So I think at this point the most effective  solution is to stop taking care of her. She’s 33. She should be able to do that herself. That’s what I’m looking for when I say Wakeup Call. 

Very insightful answer (and best of luck on your weight loss!!!).  I like the distinction you made between refusing to be a caregiver, which the fam/friends CAN do something about, versus urging Whit to lose weight, which they CAN'T do anything about.

[Dot]

@LuvMyShows, you can find my response to your Q in column 60 of the Social Media thread.

Long story short, I could literally feel my organs beginning to shut down at 380+ #s. If that's not a wakeup call, I don't know what is!

The reason I -- and many others in this forum -- are so aggravated by Twit's constant refrain of having lost 100 #s is that she doesn't acknowledge that's not what's important. Maintaining the loss is. 

So, tho I am still in the morbidly obese camp, I am grateful to have lost 120 #s & kept it off.

Edited March 1, 2018 by Dot
wrong poster

[ClareWalks]

I think Whitney's biggest obstacle is her absolute refusal to change. An individual has to want, nay NEED, to lose weight, for their own sake and their own health and wellness. Anything her friends or family do is going to fall flat if Whitney doesn't want it enough. But other critical ways that people can truly support weight loss (and some of these popped up in this episode) are:

1) Don't be an enabler. Don't bring the loved one unhealthy foods or do everything for them because they're too fat to do it themselves. Imagine if Todd and Donna just refused to put cream on Whitney or help her shave or shower. She would be forced to face the consequences of her eating.

2) Encourage healthy eating and habits. Glenn does an okay job of this but he should be guiding her more towards swimming (which Whitney seems to enjoy - enjoyment will make a BIG difference in how often she does it). Encourage the setting of goals, like a race or a lifting goal or even just "go to the gym every day," and work with them to reach it if you can.

3) Do it with them. Do the race with them. If you live with the person, take the bad foods out of the kitchen and eat healthy with them. I'm guessing Whitney's kitchen is a disaster and I doubt Donna and Buddy cared.

[AUJulia]

1 hour ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

I lost 70 pounds doing what we're all suggesting Sweatney do: move more, eat less. 

More specifically, what worked for me:

~ keeping a food diary (the My Fitness Pal app is great for this and exercise/calories burned) and eating six small (veggie-heavy, protein-rich) meals a day to keep my blood sugar steady

~ lifting heavy weights (muscle will weigh more, so my size 8-10 body is 140 pounds while my friend's 140 pounds is a size 14) to ramp up my metabolism

~ doing heart-rate-increasing cardio at least five days/week

~ never eating after 7 pm

~ getting plenty of sleep

~ drinking tons of water but no carbonated drinks or sugary drinks

What DOESN'T work: not trying. 

Edited March 1, 2018 by AUJulia
Left out protein!

[Yajmele]

1 hour ago, 3girlsforus said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

I’m one of the people who has said “fat, but working on it.”  

 

As as far as how her family can handle it, and what they should do, and whether it’s worked?  My family had expressed concern about my weight, and I had acknowledged it, but I just wasn’t in the mindset to actively DO anything about it.  If other people could want it enough for others, then there would be no fat people in the world.  We know that Whitney’s family and friends would like for her to be healthy and happy, and ultimately, they know that she isn’t. It doesn’t matter, though. She has to realize it and she has to want to change for herself. 

 

I did have a wake-up call. It wasn’t one singular event that was it; it was the realization of many things that had become my reality.  

 

Reality #1:  I could no longer go to the plus-sized stores to shop for clothes. I had old clothes I was wearing to the point where I was trying to conceal that they were falling apart. 

Reality #2:  Even walking a short distance would leave me tired. 

Reality #3:  Staying on my feet for a period of time would have a part of one leg go numb, even for as long as it took to cook dinner. 

Reality #4:  Bending down to do the simplest things - like putting on my shoes or cleaning my cats’ litterboxes - was becoming seriously challenging. 

Reality #5:  After a couple near-misses, I became terrified I would fall, and at my size, would seriously damage something. 

Reality #6:   Seats were becoming an issue.  Going out to eat at a restaurant was becoming such where some booths were not an option. I was terrified of flying out to see my brother because I feared being one of those people pulled off the plane for being ‘too fat to fly.’  And some office chairs at my job were digging into my legs. 

 

I’m sure there are others, but these were the ones I could remember. And it would become a bad cycle:  Get on the wagon for about a week or two with restricted eating and going to the gym, feel miserably sore and ravenously hungry, and go back to the fuck-it lifestyle.  Plus, losing the weight, especially as much as I needed to lose, felt like such an insurmountable task.  Also, when I did lose some weight, I would never notice a difference, which was discouraging. 

 

I finally cottoned on to the fact that I was going about this all wrong. Eating healthy doesn’t mean going anorexic.  It doesn’t mean misery. And there’s no outrunning a bad diet.  After reading some good info and anecdotes on Reddit (/r/loseit), I saw some of the very traps I had fallen into over and over again. Sore and hungry?  Get the diet under control first, and don’t make huge, sweeping changes at first.  You don’t have to exercise to lose weight.  Not seeing a difference?  You’re not going to at first. Weight loss is like a paper towel roll:  you take off one sheet, you don’t notice.  You take off 10,  you don’t notice. No one notices until it’s halfway to almost gone.  Lot of weight to lose?  It didn’t get there overnight.  It won’t go away overnight either.  

 

The biggest thing was to stop the bullshit. Stop the mental gymnastics to justify my shitty habits. Stop telling myself that what I’m doing is ‘not that bad.’   I was on the road to self-inflicting my worst fear:  not being able to take care of myself. It is that bad.  I’ve learned that, not just in weight loss and being honest about what I’m eating/how much, but in ALL things.  It’s best to live and die by pure truth, however unpleasant that truth may be. 

 

At my heaviest, I was just under 400lbs. I had lost 150lbs of that, and I gained a lot of it back last year.  I backslid little by little at a time, and gradually, I got back to the binging I used to do arbor my fattest. Through the course of several events throughout the year, I got into a really bad headspace. I finally emerged from it and am on track again. It really fucked with me that I’m doing this again, but the alternative was too scary to fathom:  going back to where I was, and worse.

 

Whitney doesn’t seem to recognize the vast ocean between being her size/level of delusional, and going on a majorly restrictive diet and exercise plan. She also doesn’t seem to recognize that not being able to do simple things for yourself and your own body is NOT normal.  There are no elderly people her size.  There’s a reason for that. 

Edited March 1, 2018 by Yajmele

[LuvMyShows]

3 minutes ago, Yajmele said:

I’m one of the people who has said “fat, but working on it.”  

.......

I did have a wake-up call. It wasn’t one singular event that was it; it was the realization of many things that had become my reality.  

.......

I finally cottoned on to the fact that I was going about this all wrong. Eating healthy doesn’t mean going anorexic.  It doesn’t mean misery. And there’s no outrunning a bad diet.  After reading some good info and anecdotes on Reddit (/r/loseit), I saw some of the very traps I had fallen into over and over again. Sore and hungry?  Get the diet under control first, and don’t make huge, sweeping changes at first.  You don’t have to exercise to lose weight.  Not seeing a difference?  You’re not going to at first. Weight loss is like a paper towel roll:  you take off one sheet, you don’t notice.  You take off 10,  you don’t notice. No one notices until it’s halfway to almost gone.  Lot of weight to lose?  It didn’t get there overnight.  It won’t go away overnight either.  

The biggest thing was to stop the bullshit. Stop the mental gymnastics to justify my shitty habits. Stop telling myself that what I’m doing is ‘not that bad.’   I was on the road to self-inflicting my worst fear:  not being able to take care of myself. It is that bad.  I’ve learned that, not just in weight loss, but in ALL things, it’s best to live and die by pure truth, however unpleasant that truth may be. 

At my heaviest, I was just under 400lbs. I had lost 150lbs of that, and I gained a lot of it back last year.  I backslid little by little at a time, and gradually, I got back to the binging I used to do arbor my fattest. Through the course of several events throughout the year, I got into a really bad headspace. I finally emerged from it and am on track again. It really fucked with me that I’m doing this again, but the alternative was too scary to fathom:  going back to where I was, and worse.

Whitney doesn’t seem to recognize the vast ocean between being her size/level of delusional, and going on a majorly restrictive diet and exercise plan. She also doesn’t seem to recognize that not being able to do simple things for yourself and your own body is NOT normal.  There are no elderly people her size.  There’s a reason for that. 

Go Yajmele!  I just wish Whit could have even half the awareness/realizations that you've had...

[MegD]

1 hour ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

You asked a really good question. For me, my wake up point was when I went to order my dress for my brother's wedding. My sister-in-law really didn't want me in the wedding and selected something she really thought I had no chance of fitting in. And at David's Bridal, there was not a thing from Vera Wang to try on in my size or even something from another designer in a similar cut to try on. So I ordered the largest size and hoped for the best. When it came in, it was really tight. Meanwhile, I was just miserable. I wasn't doing well health-wise and I was getting closer to 300 lbs than I ever thought I'd be. I'd done diets in the past with some luck but nothing lasted. So when a friend of mine posted that she had started seeing a doctor in town who runs a weigh loss clinic with a focus on healthy lifestyles and had lost 15 lbs in her first month, I figured it was worth going to talk to the doctor. At most, I'd be out my time.

So the doctor I see offers the full range of diet options from the 500 calorie drink all your meals version to the healthy lifestyle stuff. I had done the powdered crap in college and it wasn't a good option with my diabetes, so we started out at 1000 calories a day, high protein, moderate carbs (70 g), and making better food choices. I write everything I eat down via MyFitnessPal. I chart my steps, I track my water, I pick carbs that make sense for me (fruits, veggies, nuts, etc.). It helps that I am highly intolerant of wheat (gives me migraines) so I had already eliminated bread from my diet, but there are noodles out there that are made of other things. I adore cauliflower rice in all sorts of forms. I eat a lot of cheese and meat. I actually really am not hungry a lot of the time and I've had times where it's 9 PM and I'm digging out yogurt to finish out my calories and carbs for the day. I move more and it's gotten easier to go to the gym for elliptical time than it ever was before. Every two weeks I print out my food journal and show it to the nutritionist at my doctor's office and we talk about it. I have times when I'm not perfect. I hit plateaus and get bored and get annoyed. But I have someone I've got to report to so it's easier to stay on track. And the app does the math for me.

I started my diet at 293 on Oct 17, 2015. On November 21, 2015, my brother's wedding day, we had to remove 9 inches from the bust of my dress and I was at 248.6. Right now, I'm stuck in the 230s but it's because I've not been good about my exercise and I need to get back to it. But I was still able to go to London for a week over Christmas and walk between 8 and 12 miles a day without feeling like I was going to die any second. (Dad may disagree with that assessment. He insisted on afternoon naps as he was sick as a dog.)

 

I will say that while I do live with my parents at 38 (stupid job market and student loans), I appreciate what they do for me. And part of that meant that all junk left the condo (their full time home is an hour from Dad's office. They have a small condo near his office that we share.). It means that I got better about weighing and measuring things. But I even eat out and it's not misery. Twit could do it. For the first month, we focused only on the diet portion. It also helped that my doctor and her staff have taste tested just about every protein powder, snack, chip and bar out there so they could tell you which ones were worth it and which were just gross.  Saved a lot of time and trouble finding gross stuff and being disappointed.

[calpurnia99]

47 minutes ago, Yajmele said:

I’m one of the people who has said “fat, but working on it.”  

 

As as far as how her family can handle it, and what they should do, and whether it’s worked?  My family had expressed concern about my weight, and I had acknowledged it, but I just wasn’t in the mindset to actively DO anything about it.  If other people could want it enough for others, then there would be no fat people in the world.  We know that Whitney’s family and friends would like for her to be healthy and happy, and ultimately, they know that she isn’t. It doesn’t matter, though. She has to realize it and she has to want to change for herself. 

 

I did have a wake-up call. It wasn’t one singular event that was it; it was the realization of many things that had become my reality.  

 

Reality #1:  I could no longer go to the plus-sized stores to shop for clothes. I had old clothes I was wearing to the point where I was trying to conceal that they were falling apart. 

Reality #2:  Even walking a short distance would leave me tired. 

Reality #3:  Staying on my feet for a period of time would have a part of one leg go numb, even for as long as it took to cook dinner. 

Reality #4:  Bending down to do the simplest things - like putting on my shoes or cleaning my cats’ litterboxes - was becoming seriously challenging. 

Reality #5:  After a couple near-misses, I became terrified I would fall, and at my size, would seriously damage something. 

Reality #6:   Seats were becoming an issue.  Going out to eat at a restaurant was becoming such where some booths were not an option. I was terrified of flying out to see my brother because I feared being one of those people pulled off the plane for being ‘too fat to fly.’  And some office chairs at my job were digging into my legs. 

 

I’m sure there are others, but these were the ones I could remember. And it would become a bad cycle:  Get on the wagon for about a week or two with restricted eating and going to the gym, feel miserably sore and ravenously hungry, and go back to the fuck-it lifestyle.  Plus, losing the weight, especially as much as I needed to lose, felt like such an insurmountable task.  Also, when I did lose some weight, I would never notice a difference, which was discouraging. 

 

I finally cottoned on to the fact that I was going about this all wrong. Eating healthy doesn’t mean going anorexic.  It doesn’t mean misery. And there’s no outrunning a bad diet.  After reading some good info and anecdotes on Reddit (/r/loseit), I saw some of the very traps I had fallen into over and over again. Sore and hungry?  Get the diet under control first, and don’t make huge, sweeping changes at first.  You don’t have to exercise to lose weight.  Not seeing a difference?  You’re not going to at first. Weight loss is like a paper towel roll:  you take off one sheet, you don’t notice.  You take off 10,  you don’t notice. No one notices until it’s halfway to almost gone.  Lot of weight to lose?  It didn’t get there overnight.  It won’t go away overnight either.  

 

The biggest thing was to stop the bullshit. Stop the mental gymnastics to justify my shitty habits. Stop telling myself that what I’m doing is ‘not that bad.’   I was on the road to self-inflicting my worst fear:  not being able to take care of myself. It is that bad.  I’ve learned that, not just in weight loss, but in ALL things, it’s best to live and die by pure truth, however unpleasant that truth may be. 

 

At my heaviest, I was just under 400lbs. I had lost 150lbs of that, and I gained a lot of it back last year.  I backslid little by little at a time, and gradually, I got back to the binging I used to do arbor my fattest. Through the course of several events throughout the year, I got into a really bad headspace. I finally emerged from it and am on track again. It really fucked with me that I’m doing this again, but the alternative was too scary to fathom:  going back to where I was, and worse.

 

Whitney doesn’t seem to recognize the vast ocean between being her size/level of delusional, and going on a majorly restrictive diet and exercise plan. She also doesn’t seem to recognize that not being able to do simple things for yourself and your own body is NOT normal.  There are no elderly people her size.  There’s a reason for that. 

The truth is that it IS overwhelming and most people make the mistake of doing  "good" for five days and then giving up. I think you need to find a diet that you can LIVE with for the long term, that you like, that has things on it that you like to eat - because it is going to take a long time, but week by week, you add on a pound here and a pound there, eventually you have lost ten pounds. I like the paper towel visual. But people get fed up after one or two weeks. If it wasn't so hard we would all be our ideal weight. The diet I liked had certain "diet" snacks I could eat at night that were "allowed". This made the whole plan livable and I could keep up with a long time- months and years. If you feel denial you can just snap and go the other way. I know often we get to feeling sorry for ourselves and just say :Fuck it!" but in the end, after you ate it, it really didn't help anything, but made things worse. Another good thing is to forgive yourself for slip-ups and get right back on track. Anyway I wish you the best of luck, hang in there, it's hard!

As far as the exercise, again you have to try to find something you enjoy. I never liked exercise machines. I was constantly starring at the clock, how many more minutes? For some people walking with a friend where you can chat is fun. I like bike riding, for me it's just fun and I don't notice the clock at all.  I also like rollerblading but it's hard to find a good place to do it. After I discovered rollerblading, I never went back into a gym again. I do have a stationary bike set up that I can ride indoors to TV, it's okay but I still look at the clock when doing that. For some people playing basketball or tennis is fun. Another thing is if you like to walk to sign up for a 5K and they have them every weekend, and try to keep doing it a little faster each time.  

Now as for Whitney, she may have a big awakening some day and then really get on the stick. At this point it does not seem likely. Everything is such a big ordeal!

 

Edited to say when I say "you" I mean all of us dieters in general not you Yajmele personally. You are doing amazing! I loved your post!

Edited March 1, 2018 by calpurnia99

[LuvMyShows]

4 minutes ago, MegD said:

You asked a really good question. For me, my wake up point was when I went to order my dress for my brother's wedding.

....

So when a friend of mine posted that she had started seeing a doctor in town who runs a weigh loss clinic with a focus on healthy lifestyles and had lost 15 lbs in her first month, I figured it was worth going to talk to the doctor. At most, I'd be out my time.

....

I write everything I eat down via MyFitnessPal. I chart my steps, I track my water, I pick carbs that make sense for me (fruits, veggies, nuts, etc.). It helps that I am highly intolerant of wheat (gives me migraines) so I had already eliminated bread from my diet, but there are noodles out there that are made of other things. I adore cauliflower rice in all sorts of forms. I eat a lot of cheese and meat. I actually really am not hungry a lot of the time and I've had times where it's 9 PM and I'm digging out yogurt to finish out my calories and carbs for the day. I move more and it's gotten easier to go to the gym for elliptical time than it ever was before. Every two weeks I print out my food journal and show it to the nutritionist at my doctor's office and we talk about it. I have times when I'm not perfect. I hit plateaus and get bored and get annoyed. But I have someone I've got to report to so it's easier to stay on track. And the app does the math for me.

....

Awesome, MegD...keep it up!!!

I'm sensing from the replies that people have had different 'aha' moments that were their turning point.  Whit has surpassed those many times over, and still hasn't come to her senses.  I'm wondering if she's being figuratively handcuffed by her "No BS" mantra, and feels like "I can't go back on it now and admit that there really is no such thing as healthy at any weight."     

[goodbyeglittergirl]

4 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

I weigh in at about 250, and am 5'9". I have gotten down to 180 before, but it was with very nearly disordered eating and constant exercising, and it was not sustainable once I no longer had 5 hours a day to put into exercise. I have been as high as 285 but it was not comfortable and limited my activity - however, that was about 6 months after my husband left me, so I was doing a lot of comfort eating. 

What I THOUGHT this show was going to be about was a situation like mine - I am active, I have a life, I travel, I exercise, I swim, I go to the beach, I do yoga, etc. - but I do all of that as a fat person.  I have PCOS, just like Whitney, and so I KNOW from experience that losing weight for us is not a clear calories in/calories out equation. Our bodies work differently. It doesn't mean you can't lose weight, but I have had to come to terms with the fact that I will never be what society determines acceptable: skinny. I will always have these muscular legs and large shoulders and etc. and I'm going to have to find a way to be okay with that. That's what I thought Whitney's show was going to be: watch me live my life as a fat person and realize that fat people can and should be allowed to live their lives without constant disapproval. (**if you think that's not what it's like to live life as a fat person, you are wrong. I am not even a supersized fat person, so I can't imagine HOW MUCH WORSE it must be for them.)

I was looking forward to THAT show. 1 in 10 women has PCOS. Unfortunately, that is not the show we got.

[MyBigFatFakeLife]

2 hours ago, MegD said:

You asked a really good question. For me, my wake up point was when I went to order my dress for my brother's wedding. My sister-in-law really didn't want me in the wedding and selected something she really thought I had no chance of fitting in. And at David's Bridal, there was not a thing from Vera Wang to try on in my size or even something from another designer in a similar cut to try on. So I ordered the largest size and hoped for the best. When it came in, it was really tight. Meanwhile, I was just miserable. I wasn't doing well health-wise and I was getting closer to 300 lbs than I ever thought I'd be. I'd done diets in the past with some luck but nothing lasted. So when a friend of mine posted that she had started seeing a doctor in town who runs a weigh loss clinic with a focus on healthy lifestyles and had lost 15 lbs in her first month, I figured it was worth going to talk to the doctor. At most, I'd be out my time.

So the doctor I see offers the full range of diet options from the 500 calorie drink all your meals version to the healthy lifestyle stuff. I had done the powdered crap in college and it wasn't a good option with my diabetes, so we started out at 1000 calories a day, high protein, moderate carbs (70 g), and making better food choices. I write everything I eat down via MyFitnessPal. I chart my steps, I track my water, I pick carbs that make sense for me (fruits, veggies, nuts, etc.). It helps that I am highly intolerant of wheat (gives me migraines) so I had already eliminated bread from my diet, but there are noodles out there that are made of other things. I adore cauliflower rice in all sorts of forms. I eat a lot of cheese and meat. I actually really am not hungry a lot of the time and I've had times where it's 9 PM and I'm digging out yogurt to finish out my calories and carbs for the day. I move more and it's gotten easier to go to the gym for elliptical time than it ever was before. Every two weeks I print out my food journal and show it to the nutritionist at my doctor's office and we talk about it. I have times when I'm not perfect. I hit plateaus and get bored and get annoyed. But I have someone I've got to report to so it's easier to stay on track. And the app does the math for me.

I started my diet at 293 on Oct 17, 2015. On November 21, 2015, my brother's wedding day, we had to remove 9 inches from the bust of my dress and I was at 248.6. Right now, I'm stuck in the 230s but it's because I've not been good about my exercise and I need to get back to it. But I was still able to go to London for a week over Christmas and walk between 8 and 12 miles a day without feeling like I was going to die any second. (Dad may disagree with that assessment. He insisted on afternoon naps as he was sick as a dog.)

 

I will say that while I do live with my parents at 38 (stupid job market and student loans), I appreciate what they do for me. And part of that meant that all junk left the condo (their full time home is an hour from Dad's office. They have a small condo near his office that we share.). It means that I got better about weighing and measuring things. But I even eat out and it's not misery. Twit could do it. For the first month, we focused only on the diet portion. It also helped that my doctor and her staff have taste tested just about every protein powder, snack, chip and bar out there so they could tell you which ones were worth it and which were just gross.  Saved a lot of time and trouble finding gross stuff and being disappointed.

I’m sorry your sister in law didn’t want you in the wedding! I hope things are better now. If they aren’t, well, you showed her!!! Congrats on your weight loss! Keep it up. I simply don’t get where Whitney lost the battle. She had a break up with carbs Episode and everything. 

Where there’s a will, there’s a way. 

[kar328]

4 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

I'm not quite the person you're looking to hear from, but wanted to answer anyway. I'm Whitney's height, with PCOS (but 20 years older). Five years ago I weighed 248. BMI was 45. I've been fat my whole life, lost weight on WW in my 20s, gained it all back. Family used to give the not helpful "you have such a pretty face, if ... " Got told to lose weight at my physicals, etc etc. I knew I was fat, (people tend to think you're clueless sometimes), I knew it wasn't healthy (did have normal blood pressure and only high cholesterol in my late 30s), but for whatever reason I wasn't ready to change. And having anyone, even family, tell me these things, would not be the catalyst for it. I think her family isn't helping her, it's not like she doesn't know she's fat, having mock funerals or coercing her to run is only making it worse. 

I had no big wakeup call. I just got tired of being big and a fat belly getting in my way. I live alone and didn't want to be that woman in the commercial who has fallen down the stairs and can't get up. There was no lightning moment of motivation, all the comments from people over the years didn't make me want to lose and if anything hindered me starting.  I was just done with being what I was. Now 100ish pounds lighter, I'm so much happier, inside and out. Still have some pounds to go, but I'm focusing more on lifting weights and getting some muscle. Those are the numbers I'm trying to focus on. 

I wonder if Whitney watched "My 600 LB Life" last night? Or at least heard about it. 

[Mothra]

6 minutes ago, kar328 said:

There was no lightning moment of motivation, all the comments from people over the years didn't make me want to lose and if anything hindered me starting.  I was just done with being what I was. Now 100ish pounds lighter, I'm so much happier, inside and out.

This is exactly my story, too.  I truly believe that my success comes from not following a diet and not expecting anything or anyone outside of myself to "cause" me to lose weight.  I stopped dieting and lost 85 lbs.  I eat the foods I like but in normal portions; I don't drink anything but water, black coffee and 1% milk on my cereal; I don't eat between meals.  I think diets infantilize people and remove responsibility from them--"I tried dieting but it didn't work for me"--I weigh myself every morning, not to see what I weigh, but to see if I've gained or lost from the day before and consider why that was.  It's all my responsibility, and I'm not doing it to please anyone but myself.

[MegD]

2 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

I'm sensing from the replies that people have had different 'aha' moments that were their turning point.  Whit has surpassed those many times over, and still hasn't come to her senses.  I'm wondering if she's being figuratively handcuffed by her "No BS" mantra, and feels like "I can't go back on it now and admit that there really is no such thing as healthy at any weight."    

The thing is, there's no reason that she can't lose weight and still support her No BS mantra. There's a difference between being ashamed of how you look and deciding to make changes for yourself. Through body composition analysis, we've figured out that I have far more muscle than a "normal" woman my height. My BMI is always going to be overweight unless I want to veer into muscle loss. I have years of swimming to thank for that. So even though I'm 5'10 and should be under 175 for "normal" BMI, it's not going to happen. My realistic goal is somewhere around 210. I'd love to be under 200, but again, my body fat would be pretty low at that point and I'm not into the ripped body builder look. She could decide, you know what, I want to start taking charge of my life and drop the unpleasant parts that go with being so big, and lose a little purely to handle those. If she decided "hey, I want to wipe my own ass, not use a seatbelt extender, walk a quarter mile without an issue, and get back involved with dancing" and say dropped 50-100 lbs and kept them off, she would be living up to the premise of her show. That she's a fat girl who has a fabulous life. Her current life is more sad than fabulous. And after those first couple of weeks, she'd find that it gets dramatically easier because you feel better and like yourself even more, even if you're not losing any weight.

 

1 hour ago, MyBigFatFakeLife said:

I’m sorry your sister in law didn’t want you in the wedding! I hope things are better now. If they aren’t, well, you showed her!!! Congrats on your weight loss! Keep it up. I simply don’t get where Whitney lost the battle. She had a break up with carbs Episode and everything. 

Where there’s a will, there’s a way. 

I'm 10 years older than she is. She's a mid 20s walking stick who's big into fitness and yoga with all of her little friends. The close to 40 single fat sister of the groom wasn't really in the mental pictures of her day because all of her friends who were getting married were so focused on the whole "who's got the hottest looking bridal party". She's a sweet girl, but seriously, there's an age where hip high slits and strapless dresses become kind of desperate looking and not the oh so cute they look when you are 20. Luckily, I can sew and my slit magically closed itself down to almost my knee. Sister-in-law and I are friends, I just have to remember that she's a millennial and we grew up very differently so we react to things differently. It's a perspective thing.

[auntjess]

I just saw something about this woman on Facebook.
http://womensrunning.competitor.com/2017/09/fat-girl-running/mirna-recognizable-fat-runner_81117

[AZChristian]

I guess this is a personal anecdote, so I'm putting it here.

Twitney - at age 33 and fabulous - took 2 hours and 40+ minutes to walk about 4 miles.  This morning - just to get a better personal idea - I walked 4 miles inside a mall (before it opened).  I took 1 hour and 35 minutes.  I am 71.  I am 40 pounds overweight.  I have an artificial knee.  I have recently been treated for plantar fasciitis.  I was not screaming in pain, nor did anyone have to almost carry me when I got to 4 miles.

I am now thinking TLC should contact me about a new show called "My Big OLD Fabulous Life."  It would be more fun than anything Whitney does.

ETA:  MY show would feature things like . . . 

• Our visits to all 50 states
• Our visits to all the major league baseball parks
• Our current effort to ride as many ziplines as we can get to

I think our life sounds a lot more fabulous.  But we don't have ANY pizza apps on my phone.

Edited March 5, 2018 by AZChristian

[Elizzikra]

Quote

I'm guessing Whitney's kitchen is a disaster and I doubt Donna and Buddy cared.

I'm guessing her kitchen is mostly empty, because she says she doesn't cook. So I'd think there are bags of chips; cookies and candy; cereal; pasta and tuna. I doubt there are any fresh vegetables or much if any fresh fruit. I'd bet on ice cream in the freezer, whole milk in the fridge for the cereal, butter, mayo and other condiments. Soda and juice, as well as alcohol. Maybe there is fruit because those drinks need garnishes. But I think lean protein, high fiber and low fat foods don't have permanent homes in Whitney's kitchen. 

[monagatuna]

On 1/12/2018 at 10:29 AM, ClareWalks said:

I checked the PTV Forum rules to make sure this is okay and it seems like it is, mods please delete if not allowed! I created a closed FB group (meaning people outside the group can't read the posts, but I will add whoever here wants in) for discussion of Whit and all unpleasantness that is Whit-adjacent. Here is a link: Cat Breath

If the link doesn't work, PM me and we'll trouble-shoot the problem. Again if this is not allowed I am totally fine with removing it! :)

A few days ago my cat was snuggling me awake so I'd feed her. She was sniffing pretty hard at my nose so I thought she was sniffing my breath. I started laughing, scared the cat, and woke up my girlfriend. My GF has already teased me about getting hooked on this show and dislikes Whitney as much as I do (we just call her "That Fat Bitch"), so when she woke up I had to explain, "Lilly was sniffing my breath and it made me think of That Fat Bitch!"

[Maggienolia]

On 3/5/2018 at 3:17 PM, AZChristian said:

I guess this is a personal anecdote, so I'm putting it here.

Twitney - at age 33 and fabulous - took 2 hours and 40+ minutes to walk about 4 miles.  This morning - just to get a better personal idea - I walked 4 miles inside a mall (before it opened).  I took 1 hour and 35 minutes.  I am 71.  I am 40 pounds overweight.  I have an artificial knee.  I have recently been treated for plantar fasciitis.  I was not screaming in pain, nor did anyone have to almost carry me when I got to 4 miles.

I am now thinking TLC should contact me about a new show called "My Big OLD Fabulous Life."  It would be more fun than anything Whitney does.

ETA:  MY show would feature things like . . . 

• Our visits to all 50 states
• Our visits to all the major league baseball parks
• Our current effort to ride as many ziplines as we can get to

I think our life sounds a lot more fabulous.  But we don't have ANY pizza apps on my phone.

You could also include stop-offs to say HELLO to all your friends on the PTV forum!! We could be your barnacles!!! :) OR we could all meet up for the season finale and walk a big, ole, 8K together! Skipping and singing all along the way! :) 

[cherenkov]

On 3/1/2018 at 6:38 PM, MegD said:

I'm 10 years older than she is. She's a mid 20s walking stick who's big into fitness and yoga with all of her little friends.

 

On 3/1/2018 at 6:38 PM, MegD said:

She's a sweet girl, but seriously, there's an age where hip high slits and strapless dresses become kind of desperate looking and not the oh so cute they look when you are 20.

I'm in my 40s and into fitness and yoga. I'm an endurance athlete, and a weight lifter, and my BMI is 22.

I wear things that display the hard work I've done to build and refine my body because I'm proud of the work it took to get here and takes to maintain and improve relentlessly. Desperate walking stick my ass.

[MegD]

9 hours ago, cherenkov said:

Quote

She's a sweet girl, but seriously, there's an age where hip high slits and strapless dresses become kind of desperate looking and not the oh so cute they look when you are 20.

I'm in my 40s and into fitness and yoga. I'm an endurance athlete, and a weight lifter, and my BMI is 22.

I wear things that display the hard work I've done to build and refine my body because I'm proud of the work it took to get here and takes to maintain and improve relentlessly. Desperate walking stick my ass.

When you've got the body, go for it. When you're overweight and not in great shape (even if you are losing weight), there are certain cuts that aren't body friendly, especially if it's got no boning to give the dress structure and help to keep things in place and you live in DDD territory. That was what I meant by the "looking desperate" comment. There's a difference between dressing sexy and age appropriate because you look good and you've worked hard and dressing like you still want to believe you're in high school or college and you're ignoring your cellulite and batwings. This one was definitely more of a younger market / woman in shape style. It bordered on prom dress had the slit not been so high. The fabric was also really prom dress feeling though. Dress in question:

Doesn't help that it's Vera Wang so it's cut crazy small (we ended up taking 12 inches out of the dress after my weight loss, we took 2 off the belt, wtf?).

[cherenkov]

1 hour ago, MegD said:

That was what I meant by the "looking desperate" comment.

I'm not sure then what you meant by the walking stick comment, given that you seem to be opposed to body shaming. As for the dress, it looks pretty typical of a bridesmaid's dress.

[MegD]

20 hours ago, cherenkov said:

I'm not sure then what you meant by the walking stick comment, given that you seem to be opposed to body shaming. As for the dress, it looks pretty typical of a bridesmaid's dress.

I was referring specifically to my sister in law, who lives to talk about how "fat" she is so she can fish for comments about how tiny she is. Just the one specific person, not a generalized evaluation of people. Sorry if you took my statement that way.

It wasn't that it was a horrible dress. It looked great on the rest of the bridal party who were all between 20 and 25 and who were all at least in shape. It was not a cute dress on me between the very high slit, lack of boning with very low back (my girls require a bra and straps), and odd cut (the belt was far smaller than the dress at the same point, the shoulder strap was far longer than could be reasonably explained). It was also oddly ruched (I couldn't find a picture) that made my chest and stomach appear even larger. The fabric was also semi-see through but only on the bottom. In my opinion, taken together, it just wasn't something I would have selected as an age appropriate dress for me and given some of the things that went on in the planning for the wedding, I have good reason to believe she was hoping the dress would not fit me and I wouldn't be able to be in the wedding.

[editorgrrl]

On 3/2/2018 at 11:20 PM, auntjess said:

I just saw something about this woman on Facebook.
http://womensrunning.competitor.com/2017/09/fat-girl-running/mirna-recognizable-fat-runner_81117

Wow, Fatgirlrunning has an entirely different attitude than Whitney’s:

Quote

If folks are encouraged by what I do; if they can see a bit of themselves in me; if they feel inspired to put their running shoes or hiking boots on or try yoga, or attempt a class at the gym they’ve always been intimidated by—then I’m going to keep doing what I do. I will continue to have high expectations for myself. I will continue to be out on the trails and on the road, at the gym lifting heavy, in the pool swimming laps in a figure-hugging bathing suit, or simply out in the world sharing my enthusiasm for movement, authenticity and for life.

I thank my beloved running community for allowing me this.

[editorgrrl]

49 minutes ago, Me from ME said:

I am not acquainted with Fun Dip. I wonder if it is something like a mysterious confection that is available in Great Britain known as Sherbert. It is a sweet white powder that bubbles in the mouth. It is conveyed by a hollow piece of licorice that acts like a straw, or, by a lollipop that is dipped into it.

I know we have some members from across the pond. Is it still available?

Dumbledore likes sherbet lemons (hard candy w/ sherbet inside). Dib Dabs are sherbet powder packaged with a lollipop—like Fun Dip, but fizzy. (Fun Dip was originally called Lik-m-Aid, and didn’t have a dipper—one just used a finger. At my school, some kids dipped sandwich bags of Jell-O powder.)

Edited March 14, 2018 by editorgrrl
Pixy Stix had the same sugary goodness, but in a paper straw.

[mybuddyspence]

On 3/1/2018 at 1:04 PM, LuvMyShows said:

I have a genuine question, and please don't hate on me for it, but it's something that just occurred to me from reading the responses to this episode.  Quite a few of the posters to this show have said they are somewhat-to-significantly overweight.  And there is lots of advice given about what Whit's family should do to somehow get her to lose weight.  But I'm curious if any of that ever worked for you, and if it hasn't, why not, and why should it work in Whit's case?  Likewise with the physical state that Whitney is in...it seems that people are saying that she should be taking such-and-such event as a wake-up call that she needs to lose weight.  But what are those posters waiting for in terms of a wake-up call in their own lives, and why have other events not caused the weight loss decision?  I have sincere curiosity and would hope to get some sincere answers. 

The turning points for me are the realization that carrying around 25-30 extra lbs. is very likely to shorten my life span, reduce my ability with certain activities and being disgusted with my physical appearance. I've struggled with my weight starting in my 40's and it's really a day to day issue with me.  Things that work for me are using plastic containers with premeasured amounts of food (one serving), using measuring spoons and cups when I'm preparing them, weighing myself once a week, using a pedometer to track my steps and having "goal clothes". I've attended a great wellness class that taught me about good and bad fats, carbs, proteins, how many calories I should consume to lose weight, etc. In addition, I try to be more aware of what's going on when I'm eating (emotionally). I did lose about 40 lbs. for several years using those methods, but regained about 20 as of today, The regain was from me gradually getting away from good eating habits. So, my current plan is to lose at least 20 lbs. which would put me at 155 lbs. 

What really upsets me, is Whitney's message about fat acceptance is perfectly healthy and anyone who believes otherwise is a fat-shamer. 

[mybuddyspence]

On 3/1/2018 at 3:25 PM, LuvMyShows said:

Awesome, MegD...keep it up!!!

I'm sensing from the replies that people have had different 'aha' moments that were their turning point.  Whit has surpassed those many times over, and still hasn't come to her senses.  I'm wondering if she's being figuratively handcuffed by her "No BS" mantra, and feels like "I can't go back on it now and admit that there really is no such thing as healthy at any weight."     

I don't get that vibe from Whitney. She just strikes me as having the attitude of "I'll do whatever the hell I want, consequences be damned". The cynical part of me believes that TLC would love to see her go through such a huge life changing transition like that. 

[mybuddyspence]

On 3/8/2018 at 5:46 PM, MegD said:

When you've got the body, go for it. When you're overweight and not in great shape (even if you are losing weight), there are certain cuts that aren't body friendly, especially if it's got no boning to give the dress structure and help to keep things in place and you live in DDD territory. That was what I meant by the "looking desperate" comment. There's a difference between dressing sexy and age appropriate because you look good and you've worked hard and dressing like you still want to believe you're in high school or college and you're ignoring your cellulite and batwings. This one was definitely more of a younger market / woman in shape style. It bordered on prom dress had the slit not been so high. The fabric was also really prom dress feeling though. Dress in question:

Doesn't help that it's Vera Wang so it's cut crazy small (we ended up taking 12 inches out of the dress after my weight loss, we took 2 off the belt, wtf?).

Bridal dresses seem to run small in general, in my opinion. No vanity sizing there! That is a pretty dress but it would limit people due to the cut. I wouldn't feel comfortable in it based on my current body. Now if I worked my ass off, like Cherekov does, hell yes, I would rock the shit out of that dress!

I perceived the "desperate walking stick" comment as a reference to the sister-in-law's attitude. She sounds pretty snotty. It's pretty petty to not want your future sister-in-law in your wedding party based solely on her weight. Best of luck to your brother.

[Me from ME]

So I told my tofu eating bf about the chicken gizzard discussion. He said he thought they were delicious. Fond memories from KFC when they were on the menu. He's from the country and has eaten turtle, squirrel, pheasant, raccoon and bear when he was a confirmed carnivore. He harvested them all.

[Sasha888]

36 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

*Soft voice  * I like chicken  gizzards, they have to be fried but I was also  raised in the country  we eat odd things . 

My Dad always wanted gizzards and that bag of assorted organs you pull out of a turkey. My parents actually purchased cow tongue before as well. I did not partake - no thank you! :-)

My Dad said his Mom used to make something she called "Walkers and Talkers" - chicken necks & feet! (bleh!) My Mom's Dad used to make head cheese. I never had to eat my grandparent's delicacies, thank goodness.

When my Mom was little, she used to love pickled pig's feet. As soon as she was old enough to realize they were actually pig's feet, she wouldn't eat them anymore! At the time my parents were growing up, you didn't waste stuff, and you ate weird shit. That's just the way it was, especially on the farm.

[crazycatlady58]

My grandparents  butchered  a pig once. I opened  the refrigerator  door and  there was a pigs head sitting  on the shelf . She said  she was going  to make hogshead chesse the next day and did I want some, a very strong  " no thank  you" came out.

[Tosia]

11 hours ago, Sasha888 said:

My Dad always wanted gizzards and that bag of assorted organs you pull out of a turkey. My parents actually purchased cow tongue before as well. I did not partake - no thank you! :-)

My Dad said his Mom used to make something she called "Walkers and Talkers" - chicken necks & feet! (bleh!) My Mom's Dad used to make head cheese. I never had to eat my grandparent's delicacies, thank goodness.

When my Mom was little, she used to love pickled pig's feet. As soon as she was old enough to realize they were actually pig's feet, she wouldn't eat them anymore! At the time my parents were growing up, you didn't waste stuff, and you ate weird shit. That's just the way it was, especially on the farm.

My dad was born in Poland and my mom raised Polish in Nebraska  so they (and their generation in our East Euro immigrant community) cooked and ate the above regularly,  including cow  brains,  pig butts, marrow of chicken bones,  headcheese, cow tongue, homemade sauerkraut, raw onions, and ludefisk, plus steak, ham, short ribs, etc.... They loved it all.

 They lived through the Depression and wars so ai think they appreciated regular meals in general, but they weren't fat--far from it--my mom always TRIED to gain weight!  She was about a size 8 and 5'6".  Snack foods weren't sold/pushed in stores in mass quantities.  And i remember when the first McD opened in our town. 

We kids didn't have to eat those foods though.    Being raised in cow country. I really tired of red meat quickly as a kid,  and loved seafood which we only got on Friday, year round,  not just during Lent.   Good times. 

[Me from ME]

Sorry ClareWalks but I have to continue chiming in on the "gross food" discussion. I pay a lot of attention to which foods are especially nourishing and contain micronutrients and antioxidants.

I so completely agree with not wasting any part of an animal that has been slaughtered and commend anyone who puts the same into practice. I'll have to remember that "talk and walk" thing. I have a friend who refers to pig's feet as "trotters".

My mother's relatives who had survived WW2 in Britain introduced her to a food that I used to really enjoy when I still ate meat. The drippings from Sunday roast which consisted of juice and fat and congeal when cold are delicious when spread on bread with a little salt. However, I never tried black pudding or head cheese. When I saw a bristle in the loaf of head cheese in the deli case that was enough to steer me away from that.

Oh, and the bf who hunted squirrel etc. for eating - also from Nebraska.

[auntjess]

On 3/17/2018 at 8:50 PM, crazycatlady58 said:

My grandparents  butchered  a pig once. I opened  the refrigerator  door and  there was a pigs head sitting  on the shelf . She said  she was going  to make hogshead chesse the next day and did I want some, a very strong  " no thank  you" came out.

My Kansas farm aunt, trying to entertain the little city girl, asked me if I wanted to watch her chop the chickens head off.
At dinner, I announced it didn't eat "dead chickens."  (I also told them I didn't drink cow's milk, only Embassy's (dairy) milk.)
But I came here, to tell anyone who doesn't usually watch My 600 Lb Life, that new one this week features a former plus-size model, who had been a fat acceptance advocate.
Wednesday night, at 8.

Edited March 20, 2018 by auntjess

[SevenCostanza]

I apologize in advance if this was already discussed ( I don't have time to read through all the previous posts) but has anyone read the book  "Designated Fat Girl"?  It's written by Jennifer Joyner who was morbidly obese and she discusses  how awful it was for her.   She's brutally honest about it and some parts of the book are really funny.  At her heaviest she was 335 which is alot less than what Whitney weighs, but at that size her life was far from fabulous.   She had high blood pressure and full blown type 2 diabetes. She would break toilet seats, something Whitney's never mentioned but I'm betting has happened to her too.  She talks about "chub rub" which she had several times in the folds of her flesh and were in reality yeast infections.   Jennifer at least knew she had a problem and spent alot of time trying different diets and diet drugs, she never talks about feeling fabulous or healthy, she speaks the truth,  being that overweight is dangerous and very unpleasant.     If you haven't read it I highly recommend it. 

[AZChristian]

On 4/29/2018 at 11:45 AM, Dot said:

Did you wear a sports bra & long skirt with huge flowers patterned on it for the last dance? I understand it's all the rage on cruises. (That, and weighing 400 #s.)

Actually (in answer to each of your questions):

• No sports bra
• No long skirt
• No huge flowers
• Worse stuff than that is "the rage" on cruises
• Quite a few people looked to be topping 400 pounds . . . but we never went to the buffet, so we didn't see a lot of them out and about.  They tend to hang out on Deck 16 (the buffet).

18 hours ago, Kaia40 said:

We missed you here too! Hope you had a nice cruise! I love cruises! 

I love this!!! You’re the best DOT! 

Thanks.  Great cruise on the Allure of the Seas to Haiti, Jamaica, and Cozumel.  SOOOOO relaxing!!!!

[Dot]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

 

Quote

Great cruise on the Allure of the Seas to Haiti, Jamaica, and Cozumel. 

 

That's the same itinerary Twit is advertising for her Nov cruise. I think you mentioned you would be zip-lining -- did you? And what's the wgt limit? (If less than 400 #s, I declare fat-shaming.)

[AZChristian]

38 minutes ago, Dot said:

That's the same itinerary Twit is advertising for her Nov cruise. I think you mentioned you would be zip-lining -- did you? And what's the wgt limit? (If less than 400 #s, I declare fat-shaming.)

Yep, we did the zipline in Haiti.  Beyond AWESOME!!!!  There is a 250 (or 275) pound weight limit, although if Twit lies and gets on it and the cable snaps, she'll land in the water.  And drown people on the beach from the resulting tidal wave.

ETA:  The looks on our faces tells you why I will NEVER allow myself to get to a weight where I can't do ziplines.  Sheer joy!  More wonderful than ice cream, pizza, Starbucks drinks . . . anything edible!!!!

Edited April 30, 2018 by AZChristian

[Dot]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

Yep, we did the zipline in Haiti.  Beyond AWESOME!!!!  There is a 250 (or 275) pound weight limit, although if Twit lies and gets on it and the cable snaps, she'll land in the water.  And drown people on the beach from the resulting tidal wave.

ETA:  The looks on our faces tells you why I will NEVER allow myself to get to a weight where I can't do ziplines.  Sheer joy!  More wonderful than ice cream, pizza, Starbucks drinks . . . anything edible!!!!

Very cool! ?