Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[GeeGolly]

51 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

Warm hugs for you.

[emma675]

SunnyBeBe, I'm so sorry. I hope you'll find some comfort that it was a peaceful transition. This year just keeps on sucking.

[PikaScrewChu]

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

My condolences on your loss. 

[jcbrown]

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

I am so sorry for your loss. You reached out to me recently about my dad's situation and I very much appreciated that. I know how hard it is to lose someone mentally for so long before you lose them physically. I hope memories of her are comforting to you and I know you did everything you could. <hugs>

[rue721]

@SunnyBeBe I’m sorry for your loss. I’m glad that her death was peaceful and that she was in such caring hands right through the end.

[pinkie]

((SunnyBeBe)) Deepest sympathy. May her soul Rest In Peace.

[Mindthinkr]

Condolences and purrs from the Mindthinkr family to @SunnyBeBe. 

Hooray for @Scarlett45 for the reprieve with your sister’s new obsession. 

[Scarlett45]

@SunnyBeBe I’m so very sorry to hear of your cousin’s passing. You were a wonderful cousin and advocate for her. She was lucky to have you. I’m so glad she’s at peace. Be gentle with yourself. 

[zoomama]

i need to share my good news story today.  it was wonderful.

husband and i went on a drive to test our our new fast-track pass on the freeway.  i drove down to the beach which is about an hour away from home. no traffic at all, blue skies and it was just gorgeous! first a ferry ride across the small bay,  then we snagged a handicap parking spot right next to the pier. i did have to nav some stairs but i made it. i was able to walk about a third of the pier before needing to stop and rest and catch my breath. it was worth it!!!  there was a slight breeze, not enough to wear my sweater, and temps were in the mid 60's. for those in so-cal, i could see the entirety of catalina island! its been years since that has happened. we took the fast-track lane home through the canyons that recently had burned in a fire. it didn't look as bad as i had feared but we also didn't see the worst of it. we were able to get a nice dinner at a bbq place that had exactly one other table seated. we were virtually alone the whole meal. came home to my christmas lights being on and beautiful. 

it was a nice day, covid safe and little to no direct human interaction. 

[Olliesmom]

4 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

I am so sorry for your loss.   May she Rest In Peace.  

[awaken]

5 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Small Talk friends. My prayers have been answered. ANSWERED. 
 

I have mentioned before my sisters behavior has been down right AWFUL since my Mom’s surgery and she was driving me crazy. I was constantly having to discipline her, “no”, “don’t touch”, “wait”, “leave mommy alone” over and over and over again. 
 

Yes she’s been watching Disney+ but still she was being a BRAT. This week she discovered YouTube on her own (because it’s free and you don’t have to sign in), and look what has had her in a trance all day. 
 

It is DISNEY PRINCESS COLORING VIDEOS. (Princess Aurora is her favorite). Omg. She’s in a trance. She’s been perfectly well behaved. And YouTube is FREE Y’ALL!!
 

My mom got super jealous “how does she know how to download apps to her fire stick and I don’t?????” (Because my Mom would rather just ask me to do it, and my sister has nothing to do all day but fiddle with that remote)

That is pretty neat!  I’m glad she found something fun and absorbing to do!  And found it on her own!  

[ChiCricket]

4 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  

So sorry to hear of the loss of your cousin, Sunny.💕

[Love2dance]

6 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

So sorry @SunnyBeBe. May your beautiful memories be a comfort to you. I’m so glad her passing was peaceful. Hugs.

 

[Love2dance]

3 hours ago, zoomama said:

i need to share my good news story today.  it was wonderful.

husband and i went on a drive to test our our new fast-track pass on the freeway.  i drove down to the beach which is about an hour away from home. no traffic at all, blue skies and it was just gorgeous! first a ferry ride across the small bay,  then we snagged a handicap parking spot right next to the pier. i did have to nav some stairs but i made it. i was able to walk about a third of the pier before needing to stop and rest and catch my breath. it was worth it!!!  there was a slight breeze, not enough to wear my sweater, and temps were in the mid 60's. for those in so-cal, i could see the entirety of catalina island! its been years since that has happened. we took the fast-track lane home through the canyons that recently had burned in a fire. it didn't look as bad as i had feared but we also didn't see the worst of it. we were able to get a nice dinner at a bbq place that had exactly one other table seated. we were virtually alone the whole meal. came home to my christmas lights being on and beautiful. 

it was a nice day, covid safe and little to no direct human interaction. 

What a lovely day, @zoomama. I think you don’t live too far from me in Southern California. It was a beautiful day here. A relief from the gale winds a few nights ago. Glad you were able to walk the pier and enjoy your adventure.

Edited November 29, 2020 by Love2dance

[Love2dance]

 I have a jealous, but angry rant to share. For nine months we have not hugged our family, been in anyone’s home but our own, eaten inside a restaurant, danced to a classic rock band, celebrated events with family or friends, etc., etc. But we have been ok with it for the greater good, as well as to hopefully protect ourselves and everyone else from serious illness or worse. Tonight, a friend of our posted a live video on Facebook from a restaurant/bar he is at that is one county over, but only five minutes away from us. MANY people were dancing to a live country rock band, singing, hugging and dancing with each other, no masks and no distancing.
We would LOVE to do such a thing, but are too old and vulnerable to even think about it, and even if we weren’t, we would not want to add to the chance of passing Covid onto others who are. And yes, we could drive there, but have no interest in joining in or adding to the dangerous practices going on next door. 
But watching this just filled me with envy and wanting my real world back. Why do some people in our society get to live in a completely different world with completely different rules? Due to our spiking Covid numbers, our county has had to change the restrictions again and there is no outdoor restaurant eating, no gathering outside at parks, etc, except with members of our immediate household. We are very near complete lockdown again. But these rules are not for those who live five minutes away!

But then I come back to reality and am thankful for our own health and those of our friends and family, and that we are not having to worry about our next meal, or if we will have a job tomorrow. And I remember the trials and difficulties you all have shared with me on Small Talk. Then I feel guilty for all my bad feelings. Such a strange world we are living in. Thanks for listening to my rant. Sending love and hugs to you all. I can’t tell you how much your all just being here has helped me during the pandemic.

[iwantcookies]

Good news Sunday:

I can only eat food that I can see is not spoiled. Cannot taste or smell anything. Well at least I don’t miss salt and salty snacks or sugar. 

[Temperance]

So I heard from friend that a mutual friend's aunt and uncle have COVID. The aunt and uncle are their seventies. So far they're at home. They were talking to their nephew over the phone and he asked them if they have an oximeter.  They didn't, but he was able to order an oximeter and have it delivered overnight. It made the doctor's appointment go better. 

  I don't know how they got the disease, but my friends don't live near enough to visit. I know they were nowhere this aunt and uncle. 

@SunnyBeBe So sorry for you loss. Your cousin was really lucky to have you. Hopefully it's comforting to know she is no longer in pain. 

[DangerousMinds]

1 minute ago, iwantcookies said:

Good news Sunday:

I can only eat food that I can see is not spoiled. Cannot taste or smell anything. Well at least I don’t miss salt and salty snacks or sugar. 

Did you call and get the results of last week’s Covid test?

[Turquoise]

My good news for today: I heard from my doctor yesterday. Pathology came back benign. Project Yank the Uterus should be able to continue laparoscopically, which would be much easier for me to heal from. We'll discuss further at my post-op in a couple weeks. 
My BIL is recovering from COVID, but has been able to stay at home. Sister and niece are still quarantining, but showing no symptoms. The rest of my family is doing fine right now. And in "it's the little things", I was able to get a hold of some Lindor dark chocolate and peppermint truffles. Let the holidays begin!

[ginger90]

Great news on your results @Turquoise !

[iwantcookies]

8 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Did you call and get the results of last week’s Covid test?

Office is closed 

[Mindthinkr]

@iwantcookies The waiting time for answers is nerve wracking. I hope you get some good news tomorrow. You have had a rough year with medical issues. I sincerely hope that you can begin to work with your medical care team and get healthy. If you don’t have one, I strongly suggest that you make one. If you feel really lost ask for an advocate to help you navigate the system.
  I  can find myself negative at times, but then I remember that happiness and health begin with me. Sometimes I can only take baby steps, but the point is that I do. I remember that so many things are a choice and my natural inclination was to usually dive right in to the negative side of the pool. It has taken me time to make any progress. I feel so much better since I have. I pray you can do the same. I’m rooting for you. 

[ginger90]

My grandson’s paternal grandmother lives in Massachusetts. We live in Pennsylvania. Her grandparents also live in Pennsylvania. She had my grandson last weekend while she was here. They visited and stayed with his great grandparents, from Friday evening until Sunday evening.

Sounds lovely with precautions in place, right?

While she had him, they went to fucking Maryland to a sports bar for a baby shower. 
 

I am livid, my daughter is so pissed she hasn’t even spoken to her about it. The reason it is known is because my grandson mentioned it to me in conversation yesterday.

 

There was no discussion beforehand, and the school district has a policy in place that if a student goes out of state they need a negative test result 72 hours before returning, or quarantine for 14 days.

 

I want to commit a crime.

[kaleidoscope]

Group {{{HUG}}}, comfort, love, and peace to all going through so much ♥

Edited November 29, 2020 by kaleidoscope

[Quof]

6 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

I want to commit a crime.

Do it.  No jury would convict.

[Oldernowiser]

6 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

My grandson’s paternal grandmother lives in Massachusetts. We live in Pennsylvania. Her grandparents also live in Pennsylvania. She had my grandson last weekend while she was here. They visited and stayed with his great grandparents, from Friday evening until Sunday evening.

Sounds lovely with precautions in place, right?

While she had him, they went to fucking Maryland to a sports bar for a baby shower. 
 

I am livid, my daughter is so pissed she hasn’t even spoken to her about it. The reason it is known is because my grandson mentioned it to me in conversation yesterday.

 

There was no discussion beforehand, and the school district has a policy in place that if a student goes out of state they need a negative test result 72 hours before returning, or quarantine for 14 days.

 

I want to commit a crime.

I’ll help. How old is your grandson?

[lookeyloo]

Hello everyone.  I sit here crying, yet again.  I am so sorry for everyone's sadness - @SunnyBeBe - I am so sorry.  No matter what the circumstances, it is hard to lose a loved one.  I'm also happy to hear that some of my small talk friends have had good news.  Honestly, for me it is a minute by minute struggle.  Our dear son in law has lost his life partner.  I told him it is harder for him.  His house is empty. He has been here, but, still, not the same.  This is the third major loss in my life, and the hardest.  Sweet son made me promise I would be "okay".  I am trying. At least Mr. lookeyloo found out he doesn't have prostate cancer.  It is the year of new "firsts", none by our choice.  I am thankful for what we do have, but still this is hard. I'm going to try and be more regular because maybe it will be a distraction.  Thanks to everyone who has prayed for us, thought about us, etc.  

[ginger90]

Thinking of you every day @lookeyloo .

3 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

I’ll help. How old is your grandson?

He’ll be 12 next month.

[Oldernowiser]

It’s good to hear from you, @lookeyloo. There were times in my life when all I could do was get through the hours and let the days accumulate until the passing of time gave me a tiny little bit of a buffer between me and the pain. I feel for you, I really do.

Big virtual hug. 

[Oldernowiser]

8 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

He’ll be 12 next month.

Let’s start with they took him to a BAR? Okay a sports bar, but a BAR in a pandemic???

Wow. If this is a custody situation, your daughter has grounds to get the agreement revised so the grandparents never have unsupervised visits again while he’s a minor. Where was his father in all of this?

Edited November 29, 2020 by Oldernowiser

[PikaScrewChu]

I've got some pretty wicked mask-acne or whatever cutesy name they're calling it.

It's going to be weird to not wear one constantly. My parents do curbside for everything except buying produce.

I'm starting to gain weight again. The emotional eating has been bad. 😕 but soon I will blow off this popsicle stand.

Can't wait to get out of here.  

[emma675]

23 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

I want to commit a crime.

Do it. We'll post your bail.

[ginger90]

5 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Let’s start with they took him to a BAR? Okay a sports bar, but a BAR in a pandemic???

Wow. If this is a custody situation, your daughter has grounds to get the agreement revised so the grandparents never have unsupervised visits again while he’s a minor. Where was his father in all of this?

He described it as looking like a storage room at the sports bar.

His father is a much longer story, and lives in Arizona.

There’s no agreement in writing. His grandmother used to live here  in Pennsylvania too, and my daughter has always accommodated her seeing him. ☹️

[Oldernowiser]

7 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

He described it as looking like a storage room at the sports bar.

His father is a much longer story, and lives in Arizona.

There’s no agreement in writing. His grandmother used to live here  in Pennsylvania too, and my daughter has always accommodated her seeing him. ☹️

Well, that shit’s over. Just when I think people can’t be any more stone stupid...they take the damn prize.

I’m sorry, sweetie. I would be AIRBORNE in rage. I am available post-Covid for contract shin-kicking...for you, no charge. It would be my pleasure.

Edited November 29, 2020 by Oldernowiser

[ginger90]

I’m so pissed, but now at least I know I’m sane. 😃 Thank you.

[iwantcookies]

23 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I just wanted to post that my cousin, who had dementia and for whom I cared for, passed away this morning in Memory Care.  She had been on hospice for quite a while, but was maintaining with good vitals and appetite.  Still, she was in the end stage and we were never sure when it would happen.  I was able to speak with staff who were present and it was quite an inspiration of how it happened.  I’ll post more about it later.  This evening we are glad she is at peace, but with heavy heart at her passing. She was a huge part of my life. She taught me the names of the Beatles, took me to see Saturday Night Fever and Star Wars.  I was her person, since she was an only child. I don’t think it was covid. From those present, it was peaceful and for that I am grateful. 

I am so sorry for your loss. Big hug.

[crazycatlady58]

@lookeyloo gentle hugs. 

[GeeGolly]

So many things that we all have no control over - and it sucks. And while we all know things do get better in time, it doesn't lessen the pain, sadness or anger now.

Please know I'm available to 'sit' next to anyone who needs it. I'll listen quietly if that's what you need. I'll offer advice if that's what you need. I'll make you laugh if that is what you need.

Healing and light thoughts, and warm squishy hugs are being sent to you all.

 

[CherryMalotte]

SunnyBebe please accept my condolences.  It sounds like your cousin was a wonderful person.  

Hugs to you lookeyloo.  There's no timer on grief, and no right way to grieve.  Just know that you are cared for.

It was a good weekend - my husband worked and I had the house allllllllllllll to myself.   No football or any other sports or auto auction or home improvement pounding.  He's working the next couple of weekends as well.  It's not the money, of course that will be helpful, but it's the wonderful peace and quiet!         

[Oldernowiser]

@ginger90, I looked it up and your daughter may have a case for child endangerment...all the more so because they crossed state lines to do it. I believe it’s a felony.

Assholes.

[awaken]

3 hours ago, PikaScrewChu said:

I've got some pretty wicked mask-acne or whatever cutesy name they're calling it.

It's going to be weird to not wear one constantly. My parents do curbside for everything except buying produce.

I'm starting to gain weight again. The emotional eating has been bad. 😕 but soon I will blow off this popsicle stand.

Can't wait to get out of here.  

Ugh, I have mask acne too. Not cute. 

[Zella]

@SunnyBeBe Very sorry to hear about your cousin. You and your family have my condolences.

@PikaScrewChu and @awaken, I've also been dealing with mask acne. So are a couple of my library coworkers. We all have oily skin, and the one it doesn't seem to affect has drier skin. Not sure if that applies to you or not, but that's our theory about it. I finally started putting a clear bandage over the acne to provide a layer between it and the mask. It's helped it not get worse, at least. 

[awaken]

@Zella thanks 🙂 at least wearing the mask helps hide the acne!  Double edged sword. 

[Zella]

Just now, awaken said:

@Zella thanks 🙂 at least wearing the mask helps hide the acne!  Double edged sword. 

Bahahaha I've been telling myself that too! It may cause the acne, but at least it has the decency to cover it too. 😄 

[emma675]

I'm actually really enjoying wearing masks when I venture outside the house. People have no clue if my face is a mess or not and I only have to put on eye makeup, which saves tons of time. At this point, it's weird to be out without a mask on. It's amazing how much has changed when you stop and think about it. I sometimes wonder if I'll ever feel comfortable again in a restaurant full of people, a movie theater, the mall.

[Zella]

15 minutes ago, emma675 said:

I'm actually really enjoying wearing masks when I venture outside the house. People have no clue if my face is a mess or not and I only have to put on eye makeup, which saves tons of time. At this point, it's weird to be out without a mask on. It's amazing how much has changed when you stop and think about it. I sometimes wonder if I'll ever feel comfortable again in a restaurant full of people, a movie theater, the mall.

It does cover my "Bitch, please" face I get when people are annoying me. My eyes might still be a tell, but the mask probably makes people think I am friendlier. LOL

[iwantcookies]

I got acne too. It’s awful. I never had acne before. Ever.

[iwantcookies]

2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

So many things that we all have no control over - and it sucks. And while we all know things do get better in time, it doesn't lessen the pain, sadness or anger now.

Please know I'm available to 'sit' next to anyone who needs it. I'll listen quietly if that's what you need. I'll offer advice if that's what you need. I'll make you laugh if that is what you need.

Healing and light thoughts, and warm squishy hugs are being sent to you all.

 

Thanks GG. Such kind thing to offer.

[ChiCricket]

My five kids and their spouses, and my grands, and great grands are not going to get together for the holidays this year.

We made the final decision today.😢

I'm sad, but we all want to be very careful after what happened with Flaco.

 We will be doing multi-generational grab-bags for the first time...that'll be SO different..but then, nothing is normal in 2020.

Everything will be sent to each family, and then we'll open them over Zoom.

   Depending on when stuff actually gets to Germany and Maine (where my daughter's family's live-on boat is right now) will determine the actual day we'll do the ZOOM meeting to open gifts together. 

It should be chaos..but our holidays always are always nucking futz, anyway. 😁 

 We want to save money, so someone in that family (who the package is not directed to) is going to gift wrap the box and label it.

(It's too expensive to pay for a purchase bought online to be gift wrapped)

This will be the first time in 51 years of marriage that I'll be stuck with just my husband for the holidays.😕

 (he's a Puerto Rican Scrooge/Grinch, if that helps set the scene) 🙄😂

SSB (Sorry So Blabby)🙃

Edited November 30, 2020 by ChiCricket

[Love2dance]

@Turquoise, so happy for you. Now you can go ahead with your surgery, heal, and then carry on!