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Kailyn: Kail Smash!

SPLAIN

By SPLAIN
in Teen Mom 2

OtterMommy
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BitterApple

BitterApple

It sounds like Kail is trying to make Chris out to be some kind of quasi-Cole when I'd bet good money he'd laugh in her face if she asked him to pressure wash her patio. 

And goddamn, Lux is the ugliest baby I've ever seen in my life. I keep waiting for him to grow out of that alien phase, but it ain't happening. Poor kid.

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configdotsys
configdotsys

No matter what she is wearing, she is trash. Sorry to go off topic but just wanted to let you all know that as of yesterday morning, after 15 months of hell, I am cancer free. 

ReadMeLattice
ReadMeLattice

Well, guess they don't share a birthday...my baby girl was born on the 4th around midnight. 7 pounds :) 

lovesnark
lovesnark

Holy shitballs! This bitch's selfishness and ego knows no bounds. Like Jo and Javi are just going to say " Sure. Go ahead and change my son's last name to yours". And, I seriously doubt Chris will wan

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CaliforniaLove

CaliforniaLove

2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

It sounds like Kail is trying to make Chris out to be some kind of quasi-Cole when I'd bet good money he'd laugh in her face if she asked him to pressure wash her patio. 

And goddamn, Lux is the ugliest baby I've ever seen in my life. I keep waiting for him to grow out of that alien phase, but it ain't happening. Poor kid.

Lol! Chris as Cole...have we ever heard Chris speak? Maybe he IS like Cole & that's why he doesn't want to he filmed? "Oh, hey Noreen"..."It's DAN!!!"...

I think cutting his hair, or at least not styling it like Pebbles from the Flinstones would be helpful for Lux...or maybe not, but c'mon already Kail. Maybe she's going for baby dreads as an act of repentance towards Chris?

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geauxaway

geauxaway

7 minutes ago, CaliforniaLove said:

Lol! Chris as Cole...have we ever heard Chris speak? Maybe he IS like Cole & that's why he doesn't want to he filmed? "Oh, hey Noreen"..."It's DAN!!!"...

I think cutting his hair, or at least not styling it like Pebbles from the Flinstones would be helpful for Lux...or maybe not, but c'mon already Kail. Maybe she's going for baby dreads as an act of repentance towards Chris?

Nah.  She’s a poser to the T.  Lux’s hair is just her way of being in control.  He doesn’t have a white boy haircut.  Her words, not mine. 

I was honestly thinking to myself that if she really wanted to make it big she should write a pilot script for a sitcom based on a white trash trying to be something else mom of serial baby daddy kids.  She has the perfect cast of characters.  1.  Responsible dad (Jo)  2. Needy dad (Javi) 3. Dreamer dad (Chris).   And then the Momma Beat, who is morphed beyond recognition from multiple surgeries.  Although, in my sitcom mind, every suregery would be portrayed as her attempt to distance herself as far as possible from her deadbeat momma. Kail would, of course, be the antagonist in this show, ergo no green light from her.  But in the reality of it all, her life is laughable.

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Mkay

Mkay

(edited)
1 hour ago, CaliforniaLove said:

Lol! Chris as Cole...have we ever heard Chris speak? Maybe he IS like Cole & that's why he doesn't want to he filmed? "Oh, hey Noreen"..."It's DAN!!!"...

I think cutting his hair, or at least not styling it like Pebbles from the Flinstones would be helpful for Lux...or maybe not, but c'mon already Kail. Maybe she's going for baby dreads as an act of repentance towards Chris?

On her instgram Q&A someone asked her when she is going to cut Lux’s hair. She said when he tells her to. 

Edited by Mkay
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Marley

Marley

These people are such jokes lol.

Kail and her instagram q&a with the smiley face acting like Chris is the greatest. Shes obsessed and it’s hilarious. Chris will prob peace out once Summer is over and the heat is gone. Does he even work? 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

(edited)
6 hours ago, Mkay said:

Please tell me this girl is not that stupid. She was the third stringer coming off the bench behind Brianna and Kail and now she's moved and bought a house? 

Maybe Javi finally found someone as needy and desperate as he is.

Edited by BitterApple
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Tatum

Tatum

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18 hours ago, druzy said:

God, Kail trying to be self deprecating is even MORE annoying than the outright bragging. First off, "her" landscaper did not say that. I'm sure of it. She's just trying to show that she can laugh at herself and also remind everyone that she has a landscaper on speed dial because she's such a classy lady. And also remind everyone that she's still in the hearts of her various baby daddies enough that when she asks them for a favor, they'll jump to do it. It would almost take more effort to ask someone to pressure wash a patio than just to pressure wash the patio yourself. The whole conversation was made up, I'm sure.

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heatherchandler

heatherchandler

8 hours ago, CaliforniaLove said:

Lol! Chris as Cole...have we ever heard Chris speak? Maybe he IS like Cole & that's why he doesn't want to he filmed? "Oh, hey Noreen"..."It's DAN!!!"...

 

I AM DYING!

That would be awesome if his voice is squeakier than Cole's!  They could have a high-pitched squeak-off.

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Mkay

Mkay

48 minutes ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

There's a number 10 on the front door, and the garage door is inches away.  I'm guessing condo/townhome (not that there's anything wrong with that -- I live in one).

I was thinking that too.  Maybe one of Jo’s propertys. Hahaha

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druzy

druzy

17 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

Knowing this group, I bet there is someone on this board who is able to get the details on the house purchase... 

They just closed so it takes a few days for it to be recorded.

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BitterApple

BitterApple

(edited)

I'm curious to see if both names are on the deed. I've seen enough Judge Judy episodes to know mingling assets with someone you're not married to isn't a very good idea. They haven't even been exclusive for a full year.

Edited by BitterApple
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geauxaway

geauxaway

9 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I'm curious to see if both names are on the deed. I've seen enough Judge Judy episodes to know mingling assets with someone you're not married to isn't a very good idea. They haven't even been exclusive for a full year.

I’m assuming they used Javi’s VA entitlement for the financing, and in that case she wouldn’t be on the loan because they are not married.  He could vest her in title to the property, tho.

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Snarky McSnarky

Snarky McSnarky

Javi's said he will be leaving the Air Force, but they just bought that house.  I wonder if he'll be getting a civilian job at Dover AFB after his enlistment.  What other job could he possibly get in Dover?  Talk show host?  Family planning counselor? 

I think the three biggest employers in Dover are the AF Base, Delaware State Uni, and MTV.   

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ChristmasJones

ChristmasJones

21 hours ago, Birdee said:

That's not a compliment, Kail. Or something that most people would share with the whole world. I would be mortified if someone said that to me. 

But that is because you are not shameless like Karl.

I've come to realize that one of the core personality traits that people who remain on reality tv shows for years have in common is being shameless / lacking self-awareness.  

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Snarky McSnarky

Snarky McSnarky

8 minutes ago, ChristmasJones said:

I've come to realize that one of the core personality traits that people who remain on reality tv shows for years have in common is being shameless / lacking self-awareness.  

In medical textbooks, it's known as Vicki Gunvalson Syndrome.

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Snarky McSnarky

Snarky McSnarky

(edited)
On 8/1/2018 at 11:54 AM, MaddyMaeboxerbabe said:

I think Javi is counting on going the route of Tony from the challenge.  He NEEDS the money for his two kids and all the attention MTV brings.  

Did javi get the “starter home” in the divorce from Kail?

It appears he has been paying property taxes on a house that was purchased in 2013.  That must be it.

https://www.cityofdover.com/evo_property_tax_search

Edited by Snarky McSnarky
Corrected erroneous assumption.
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CaliforniaLove

CaliforniaLove

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16 minutes ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

Jenelle's Producer is now working with Kail?  Is this a promotion or demotion?  

producer.jpg

I guess it would be more of a promotion because this gig at least comes with the perk of her life not being in immediate danger? 

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Mkay

Mkay

(edited)

I wish she would make up her mind on her kids names. On her snap today she told the boys they were going to go cake taste testing for Lux’s cake. ? Make up your mind on his name. 

Edited by Mkay
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TheRealT

TheRealT

32 minutes ago, MaddyMaeboxerbabe said:

Cake taste testing for a one year old’s birthday??   Was chris there too?  Or will whatever they chose get changed per chris’ order like what happened to the original theme of the party.  Allegedly!  

 

Just now, BitterApple said:

Kail is so pretentious. It's a freaking birthday party for a one year-old, not a State Dinner. 

I can't believe the planning is still ongoing. Didn't she post about Chris deciding to change the theme like a month+ ago? Wasn't Lux born in June/July?

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Mkay

Mkay

23 minutes ago, TheRealT said:

 

I can't believe the planning is still ongoing. Didn't she post about Chris deciding to change the theme like a month+ ago? Wasn't Lux born in June/July?

August 3rd I think.  

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FreetheGirlses

FreetheGirlses

On 7/31/2018 at 5:28 PM, Snarky McSnarky said:

Is Kail too busy doing nothing to mow her own lawn?  Fresh air, sunshine, exercise.

Where, I'm from, NO ONE mows their own lawn. Literally, I do not know one person, and I didn't know a family who did it themselves growing up. IDK if this is a Long Island thing or what...we have so many nail salons that I was in shock when I went to school in another part of the country and they quoted me a price for a regular manicure/pedicure (that I could get for under $25 on Long Island always). I have a feeling that the landscaper thing is similar. 
I wouldn't know, because I don't own anything besides my co-op. Getting married this month and can hopefully find a house in the near future that's affordable (I am not holding my breath). 
So much to criticize Kail for, but I hesitate to do it with this one. I'm all for spending money on things that make your life easier and give you more time...IF you can afford it. 
Though Kail has all the time in the world, but whatever. 
Speaking of which, I didn't even feel like going cake tasting for my own wedding. She is so extra. 

 

16 hours ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

In medical textbooks, it's known as Vicki Gunvalson Syndrome.

Just choked on my bagel, thanks. 

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FlowerofCarnage

FlowerofCarnage

(edited)

Such pretenious trash. A cake tasting for a 1 year old's birthday party...a party he won't remember? Did Isaac get a cake-tasting this year? Did she do more than just have him be surrounded by her horde of DUFFs while he opened presents?

Edited by FlowerofCarnage
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citychic

citychic

12 hours ago, Mkay said:

I wish she would make up her mind on her kids names. On her snap today she told the boys they were going to go cake taste testing for Lux’s cake. ? Make up your mind on his name. 

No shoes on the baby in a food establishment. Entitled bitch looks like a trash ho off the street with her business hanging out, Maci is probably regretting giving her that shirt to rep now eh?   I hope those people inside are laughing behind her back while she's taking this picture. 

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guilfoyleatpp

guilfoyleatpp

2 hours ago, ghoulina said:

Anyone else think the cake tasting is an attempt to get free cake for the party? You will be compensated in Instagram posts!

Agree. I cannot imagine finding the time to wrangle 3 kids to go to a "cake tasting" for a first birthday. This bitch has had two weddings and at least 5 birthday parties between her other two in Delaware. Does she not know who has good cakes yet?

I guess if your job IS taking pictures and scoring freebies, you make the time for that. 

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Maharincess

Maharincess

10 hours ago, FlowerofCarnage said:

Such pretenious trash. A cake tasting for a 1 year old's birthday party...a party he won't remember? Did Isaac get a cake-tasting this year? Did she do more than just have him be surrounded by her horde of DUFFs while he opened presents?

DUFFs? 

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SnarkEnthusiast

SnarkEnthusiast

37 minutes ago, Maharincess said:

DUFFs? 

Designated Ugly Fat Friends to make yourself look hotter by comparison.

Wait, Lux's name isn't finalized yet? Where'd Russel come from?

Catch me up - Kail is sleeping with Chris again because he's her live-in maid? And I thought Javi's gf was his ex from years ago - did he actually manage to recruit someone new?

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FlowerofCarnage

FlowerofCarnage

17 minutes ago, SnarkEnthusiast said:

Designated Ugly Fat Friends to make yourself look hotter by comparison.

Wait, Lux's name isn't finalized yet? Where'd Russel come from?

Catch me up - Kail is sleeping with Chris again because he's her live-in maid? And I thought Javi's gf was his ex from years ago - did he actually manage to recruit someone new?

Russell is his middle name.

Apparently, Chris and Kail reconciled so now he is shacking up with her.  However, I think it was Druzy who did a little research and discovered that Chris was served with an eviction notice recently  so  reconciliation isn't genuine.

Javi's latest victim is someone he dated breifly last year.

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toodywoody

toodywoody

(edited)
On 7/29/2018 at 9:19 PM, Mkay said:

Yes!!! Lolol

WTF. Oh look at me, someone take my picture. Does every fucking picture have to be staged. Does she always have to have someone and a camera around?

Cake tasting, it is a fucking cake for a 1 year old. JC I swear she thinks she is a Kardashian or something AND stop with pulling Lux's hair up, fucking cut it and this kid has a serious resting bitch face all the time, but look at both parents, Chris is resting douche face and Kail is resting whale face.

Edited by toodywoody
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TheRealT

TheRealT

59 minutes ago, FlowerofCarnage said:

I can't imagine what it's like for Isaac and Lincoln to have this man whom they don't really have a relationship with, move into their home. 

I think they're actually kind of used to having random adults move in and out of their home. Chris lived with them before when he and his real girlfriend were on a break and I'm sure the various hangers on, babysitters, etc. sometimes stay for days/weeks/however long. Kail seems to live a fairly typical college/post-college lifestyle hanging out with friends/roommates most of the time, only she does it in a McMansion with 3 kids. It's probably confusing for the kids that Chris is suddenly cool enough to live there (probably sleeping in Mommy's bed) after they almost certainly heard Kail going on and on about how he mistreated her, what a shitty dad he is to Lux, etc. If they like him, they'll be hurt and confused (again) when he leaves and suddenly goes back to being a bad guy (again). They probably miss Bone, the last chick Kail was dating, and a bunch of other people who have been fixtures in their home/caretakers until Kail discarded them.

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