S09.E17: Eat, Pray, Run

[walnutqueen]

Oh dear god, the shrieking harpies are on the loose in Bali ... I suggest you turn the volume down before watching this first look.

[featherhead]

Someone needs to put a gag in Vickie's mouth! I know more mature 5 year olds.

I like Heather calling Tamra on her bullshit.

[SFoster21]

Why oh why do they behave like clowns? Tamra and her "stone with moss" -- just leaves you speechless.

Talk about a waste; industrial, poisonous, fetid waste.

[Snarky McSnarky]

Oh dear god, the shrieking harpies are on the loose in Bali ... I suggest you turn the volume down before watching this first look.

They were in the van and Heather said, "Vicki, look at the monkey."  Vicki shrieked before she even turned her head to actually see the monkey.  Even then, what is so shriek-worthy about a little monkey?  Six year old girls do that stuff, but middle aged women?

[Ubiquitous]

Oh dear god, the shrieking harpies are on the loose in Bali ... I suggest you turn the volume down before watching this first look.

My gawd, almost the entire part I saw this morning was them shrieking, interupted by an inappropriate comment by Tamra, but at least we got to see them doing touristy things this time.

[walnutqueen]

This bunch should not be allowed to do touristy things - anywhere.  They shouldn't be out in public - they need to  be kept behind locked gates.   ;-)

[featherhead]

Tamra having all the fish by her was hysterically telling.  Ugh boots indeed.

[walnutqueen]

When the ladies asked why none of the fish went for Heather, a couple of things besides her allegedly pristine pedicure came to mind ...   ;-)

[Chit Chat]

What I learned from the preview is that the monkeys behaved better than some of the HoWives.   Sheesh!  What an embarrassment they can be.

[RubyWoo72]

Tamra having all the fish by her was hysterically telling. Ugh boots indeed.

Yes. This bitch is busted. Get thee to a Happy Nails on a regular basis, lady.

And I just noticed how ungainly Vicki's gait is when they were walking by the monkeys. Completely oafish. Ack.

[islandgal140]

Vicki shrieking in the FAMILY VAN before even seeing a monkey made me want to clock the heffa. She just should have been chloroformed and left on the bus.

 

That fish pedicure is one of the grossest things I have ever seen. I would never do that mess. Surprised that Shannon opted to try since she is on record as hating fish and not even wanting to go into the ocean for fear of one of them brushing up against her. So color me surprised when she dip both feet into a tank full of those little suckers. On the one hand, I admire her for facing her fears on the other I wish she hadn't because her shrieking was terrible. I have really been liking her on this trip. I like what she said about those two idiots Backdoor Tamra and Icky Vicki opening closed cabinets at a place of worship. I think that is one of the rudest most disrespectful uncouth things I have ever seen done on this show. Just wow!

 

Heather has been great too. I did like that she wouldn't let Tamra steam roll over her and told it like it was. Vicki and Tamra are so childish. It was almost like they were throwing in their new found closeness in Heather's face now that Tamra isn't happy with Heather daring not to agree with 100% even though she is wrong. I am still on Shannon's side in the whole Heather vs Shannon issue but I like how Heather has been outside that particular dynamic on this Bali trip.

 

Of course the fishies were all over Tamra's hooves. She is a pile of rotting flesh and they love dead skin.

 

Tamra has no need to worry about a monkey gangbang. They have much better taste than that and even they aren't that hard up! Why does she have to sexualize everything? Bet Eddie isn't hitting it on the regular. Oh and bullshit about her not having an issue if Lizzie had allegedly said shag instead of fuck. I don't believe that for a minute.

 

Ugh at Tamra being unable to appreciate the beauty of the stone sculptures. That was breathtaking on the screen so it must have been phenomenal in person and there her simple ass is saying she doesn't see how people can go so gaga over a pile of moss covered rocks. Hate her! What a waste of a trick on an idiot!! 

Edited August 11, 2014 by islandgal140

[bosawks]

They were in the van and Heather said, "Vicki, look at the monkey."  Vicki shrieked before she even turned her head to actually see the monkey.  Even then, what is so shriek-worthy about a little monkey?  Six year old girls do that stuff, but middle aged women?

 Maybe Vicki thought she meant Brooks.......

[Persnickety1]

I was amazed at the length and points of Lizzie's foot talons.

 

Did anybody else see that?  I was tired watching this and maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me but damn...Homegirl looked like she could use those toe claws as deadly weapons.

 

And LOL forever at all the fish swarming to Tamra's feet.  The evil side of me was wishing they had stocked that tank with at least 1 piranha just for Tamra.

Edited August 11, 2014 by Persnickety1

[SFoster21]

Wouldn't go near her. Professional courtesy.

Edited August 11, 2014 by SFoster21

[walnutqueen]

I had a magical vacation with my Mum in September 2001 (yes, that one).  We were staying at a wonderful place on the Sunshine Coast and strolled over to a tiny sand beach, where I sat on a rock and swished my feet in the shallows.  The amazing part was my old Mum, whose bare feet probably hadn't touched the earth for half a century, joining me - and the little minnows groomed our feet most delicately.   Not a shriek or a shudder between us (and Mum's easily grossed out). 

 

Ooh - just remembered the first time I fell asleep on Lanikai Beach in Hawaii, and woke to a few ghost crabs cleaning the dead skin off my toes.  So cool!  :-)

 

Bali was the place to go in the 1970's, according to my Canadian nude beach friends at the time.  The Balinese are probably as used to dealing with asshole tourists as they are true spiritual seekers and travel aficionados.

[Trooper York]

Vicki Gunvalson: Howler Monkey in High Heels.

[MatildaMoody]

This first look gave me a flashback to an Ugly Betty Episode. The Vanessa Williams character had this type of pedicure because she was trying to seduce the owner of the company. He apparently had a foot fetish or something. But, I didn't know that this type of pedicure was a real thing. I just assumed they made it up for that show. 

[Bobcatkitten]

It is indeed a real thing. First time I saw it was last year on the Kardashians' trip to Greece. There was very similar shrieking.

[featherhead]

Vicki Gunvalson: Howler Monkey in High Heels.

Please don't insult the monkeys!!

[BucFan]

Tamra keeping it classy by having her foot on top of the coffee table in the hotel lobby.

[AKA...CJ86]

It is indeed a real thing. First time I saw it was last year on the Kardashians' trip to Greece. There was very similar shrieking.

...Didn't the NY HW's do it too last season...on the trip Aviva ruined?

[psychoticstate]

Vicki shrieking in the FAMILY VAN before even seeing a monkey made me want to clock the heffa. She just should have been chloroformed and left on the bus.

 

 

Holy crap, this made me bust out laughing . . . which scored me more than a few puzzled/concerned/irritated looks here at the office with my supposedly random snorts and laughter.  Just the thought of Vicki being clocked and chloroformed fills my little black heart with glee (and I usually don't mind Vicki - - maybe when she's not around that sea beast Tamra).

 

I like what she said about those two idiots Backdoor Tamra and Icky Vicki opening closed cabinets at a place of worship. I think that is one of the rudest most disrespectful uncouth things I have ever seen done on this show.

 

 

Tamra + Vicki = rude, disrespect and uncouth.  So there you go.   But in a show that's been chock full of rude, disrespectful and uncouth things (see: Slade Smiley, Gretchen Rossi, the Curtin females, etc.) to say this one of the worst says a lot.

 

Wouldn't go near her. Professional courtesy.

 

 

Yet another snort and laugh out loud moment.  You guys are killing me today.

 

Say what you want about how pretentious Heather is but even Miss Prisspot seems to be game with whatever is going on vacation wise.  She was cool with the monkeys, cool with the fish pedicure and I recall her being cool about the whitewater thing on a previous season.  Shannon seems to be the same.  Funny how the two ladies who seem to think they are the coolest are the most annoying and narrow minded during the trips.

 

I know it's not going to happen but I would get down on my hands and knees and thank Baby Jesus if Tamra actually trips, falls and face plants during her "you'll never see my face again!" shriek as she runs into the night.

[nenya]

Why oh why do they behave like clowns? Tamra and her "stone with moss" -- just leaves you speechless.

Talk about a waste; industrial, poisonous, fetid waste.

SFoster21, she just predicted her own future. With the way she is acting, no one will care about her either (reality show wise, obviously I wouldn't want her kids to hate her or something).

 

And to think, last week I was hoping they would go to a temple and maybe learn something. I shouldn't wish that about people and sacred places. Ladies, stay by the pool with your champs!

 

The only thing I will give them some leeway is the fish pedicure. I also tried it (Thailand for me). It is very weird. I was supposed to do it for 15 minutes, I lasted for maybe 3-4. I didn't enjoy it, and it wasn't enough time to feel much of a difference. But I managed to not shriek like a banshee, I mean, it is a voluntary thing, and at most you are out a few dollars by stopping early. 

[Mischievious]

Is tonight the season finale?

[PhilMarlowe2]

No, that is next week - that is also the episode where we will be treated to Ms. Terry whipping out the big guns and calling David what they refer to in the medical field as "a penis!" The hits just keep on coming with this crew...

[Persnickety1]

This first look gave me a flashback to an Ugly Betty Episode. The Vanessa Williams character had this type of pedicure because she was trying to seduce the owner of the company. He apparently had a foot fetish or something. But, I didn't know that this type of pedicure was a real thing. I just assumed they made it up for that show. 

 

This type of pedicure was also featured in St. Barth's when the ladies went on RHONYC.

 

Although I don't recall the NY women screeching like the OC women did.  

[MatildaMoody]

 

This type of pedicure was also featured in St. Barth's when the ladies went on RHONYC.

I think I missed that because of all of the crazy that took place during that trip.

[BucFan]

I think Gene Simmons did the fish pedicure on his show years ago too.

[charming]

Ugh, Vicki and Tamra need to dial it down. I'm glad Shannon said something to them about their disrespectful behavior. I also hope they have the sense to be embarrassed about how they acted. Open your mind to new cultures and experiences.

[RubyWoo72]

I think I missed that because of all of the crazy that took place during that trip.

There were some of these types of pedicure stations at at least one nail salon here in Southern California, but I remember it being closed for health reasons or something like that. Something about not being able to properly sanitize the tub after each use.

[bosawks]

I'm not shit stirring I'm merely watching out for my friends by telling them what their friend said to me as a friend.....

Oh, Real Housewives don't ever change.

[charming]

I need a cigarette!

 

Why didn't Heather call Tamra an ambulance? Some friend she is!

[mbaywife123]

That was great! Did you see Tamra realizing that the ladies had been putting together Tamra's insults and lies after being without her all day and when Vicki would not go to the ladies room with her so she could do her usual isolate and spin . You could see the dread In her eyes. Run Tamra Sue Waddle, Barney,Judge., you should have chosen this week to deactivate your Facebook and leave the country. You are toast at this point!

[Ubiquitous]

Poor Tamra... NOT!

[JAYJAY1979]

Shannon was the MVP of the Tamra take down in tonight's episode. 

Edited August 19, 2014 by JAYJAY1979

[ramby]

At least Tamra and Heather actually did something worthwhile in Bali.  I thought their bike ride trip was gorgeous.  Meanwhile, the other cows didn't even leave the resort.  All they did was sit there and talk loads of crap. What was the point in that?  They wanna take Tamra down but they hurt Shannon, made Vikki cry and when Tamra went running they could see Heather had sympathy for her so then they start telling Heather crap and make Heather almost cry.  I friggin hate people like that. I don't even believe half the stuff they said. Heather said Lizzie definately said f*ck so Lizzie was already lying about that.  They twisted the things that Tamra said as we all could see via flashbacks.  Tamra is an ass for sure but Lizzie and the other chick are far worse IMO.

[Mrsrwc]

Ok... I have way too many thoughts about tonight. I will not bore you all. Here is a question.... Did Tamra really comment on Lizzie's shorts , were Tamra's any longer?

[motorcitymom65]

I detest Tamra, but no Vicks, you haven't been a good friend to Tamra this season. Vicks is so offended to hear that Tamra is still talking shit about Brooks, yet Vicks has been talking about Tamra nonstop to Lizzie and Shannon. Her sense of betrayal is ridiculous.  

[phoenix780]

Well that was oddly intense and strangely real, at least from Vicki (and possibly Heather).  I think I wound up feeling sorry for Vicki and, in a weird (mild) way, Tamra.  Vicki seemed genuinely hurt.  Tamra's just not smart enough for this kind of thing- not smart enough to see it coming, and not smart enough to handle it.

 

Because of the editing choices- cutting out Danielle, relying on flashbacks without showing a change in relationships based on the "new" conversations we're seeing- I'm not sure what exactly Tamra said...except that she clearly said a lot of shit and seems to have a weird concept of a private conversation in a reality show environment.  She seems to have been thrown by Shannon, who just lays it all out there. 

 

As far as "fuck"-gate, I'll go with Heather's version, as I think she was most likely to have been sober.  And it fits with the snapshot of Lizzie we saw last week.  I might have a different opinion had I found out who Danielle was.

 

I would be pissed beyond belief if I booked a trip to that resort as an ordinary person and these women and camera crews showed up.  Hopefully they were forewarned or compensated somehow.

 

Let's get to the reunion.  I don't care about Terry vs. Shannon's husband, and there's a lot to clear up, imho.  Or, y'know, to shriek about while throwing phones and random paperwork at Andy so he can discredit your enemies.

Edited August 12, 2014 by phoenix780

[charming]

Now that I've stepped outside to smoke.

 

I'm a little surprised that Tamra crumbled that quickly. What an amateur. I don't think I've ever seen a group of housewives put the pieces together on camera like that before. It was awesome. I'm annoyed that Vicki's main issue with Tamra is her not liking Brooks. Nobody likes that phony grifter. Stop blaming her for Brianna not liking him.

 

Yes, I think Lizzie was semi shit stirring. I'm sure she didn't mind when Tamra was talking trash about other people. It's just when she realized that Tam's doing the same thing to her that she has an issue.

 

So Shannon tries to make amends with Heather again. Heather accepts her words, semi apologizes for what she did but then has to bring up another issue that she's upset about? She will never let this feud with Shannon go. Heather will never admit that she's wrong. Heather always has to be on top. The eternal offended innocent victim. I also don't think Heather can be BFFs with Tamra and then clutch her pearls about David's liquored up inappropriate joke. Hypocrite much? My God she's grating on my nerves this season.

 

I want Tamra to come back next season just to see her turn on Heather. I'd love for her to start spilling The Dubrows secrets. You know how dirty she gets.

 

Bali is gorgeous!

Edited August 12, 2014 by charming

[Chicklet]

Rice Tree. That is all, I'm now dead.

[TexasGal]

Dear Vicki - we all now know that Balinese monkeys, elephants and stray dogs are all better behaved than you are. Please stop screeching at random animals. If they bug you that much, stay in the family van. K? Thanks. ETA: also better behaved, the "sucking fish." Can't believe I forgot them.

Is it wrong that I wanted a bigger Tamra take down? She did fold like a house of cards. Bah.

Edited August 12, 2014 by TexasGal

[Tippi]

The talking head segments this episode were just over the top in their stupidity.  Middle school girls would act more mature than this bunch of coconuts.

[Ubiquitous]

Dear Tamra;

Please ask Vicki for notes on how to produce actual moisture when you cry.

[poeticlicensed]

They all talk shit about each other. Every.single.one.of.them. The key to a RH takedown is to get the others on your side. Tamra is a piece of shit, but so are Lizzie, Shannon, Heather and Vicki. They all talk shit behind each other's backs. There are no innocent injured parties here. They are all horrible.  

[jnymph]

For once these dumbasses had the perfect opportunity to use their favorite word "literally" correctly. Shannon could have said she literally had a monkey on her back & the other time Heather could have used it in regards to literal monkey business. Instead she called it a pun.

Also, did I hear Tamra say something was taken out of "contents"?

It's these things that grate on me. : \

Edited August 12, 2014 by jnymph

[Midnight Cheese]

Well, that was a little unsatisfying.

 

Yes, all of these fools talk shit about each other, but - Tamra vigorously puts most of this shit in motion, at least to me, and never gets held accountable for anything.  The stuff with Shannon alone is pretty unforgiveable.  She pushed as hard as she could, quite literally physically pushed Shannon, to try and have some kind of rationale to say Shannon was crazy - because Shannon in all likelihood told the truth about the 'take the Beadors down' bullshit.  She ruined Lizzie's one event where everyone showed.  And she was shown giving her unsolicited put-downs of Crooks all season.  The other wretches do have reason to be pissed at Tamra and have her dead to rights on those things.  And I do think she has a hate-boner for Lizzie strictly because of Lizzie's 'exotic' looks while she, Tamra, is a rapidly melting creature from The Secret of NIMH. 

 

But I wanted a real meltdown.  Tamra folded but she is a cockroach comfortably living inside of a Twinkie.  Of course she won't be fired (despite distributing Lizzie's real phone number) and will be back next season.  She is a walking sack of shit coated in Teflon.  Ugh.

[diorella78]

I think that I've never seen Heather as upset as she looked when she heard the "anorexic" comment. Maybe it's just editing, but I thought that was interesting (not trying to diagnose her with anything).

I thought that Tamra screamed, "Get away from me!" in the preview??

I thought her reaction was interesting as well. Tamra for the most part spouts the truth in her own vile manner, so if she said Heather was anorexic I wouldn't doubt if it were true. I am sure if Heather and Tamra are ever on the outs, that will be the "go to" crap she launches at Heather....."were you at Bass Lake?" "Were you in treatment for your eating disorder???"

Edited August 12, 2014 by diorella78

[motorcitymom65]

It was absolutely unsatisfying.  After dreaming about Tamra getting paid back for all the shit she had done, this just isn't what I was expecting. Tamra has done enough shit that folks don't need to twist anything or make shit up, or try to get back at her for some silly perceived slight, but that is what it feels like is going on. 

 

I do think that Lizzie was ridiculously pissed off at Tamra for missing her party. We have already seen Lizzie proven to be a liar about the text. We also saw the way she reacted to her husband in the limo later that night. It looks like Lizzie has decided to make Tamra pay for that by revealing a bunch of shit that she has no doubt said, but said in conversation with other folks who were also saying shit. Was it Danielle or Lizzie who met Tamra and Heather for lunch and said that she had heard that David was upset in his marriage? Lots of hands are dirty in that. Both Lizzie and Shannon are well aware that Vicki has been talking a lot of shit about Tamra, yet they feel some sort of need to share with her that Tamra has said things about Brooks? Didn't Vicki tell Shannon that she could never trust Tamra again. Didn't she warn Lizzie to watch out for Tamra? Yes, Tamra is a terrible friend, but why aren't they giving Vicki the side-eye about what a shitty friend she is? Has Lizzie forgotten the Dumb and Dumber comment, or the way that Vicki treated her earlier in the season? 

 

I completely believe Heather in the whole fuck vs. shag deal.  She likes Lizzie, and had no problem calling out Tamra the night before when she misrepresented what she had said about Lizzie's dress. I thought Heather's question to Tamra - would it have bothered you less if she had said "shag" instead of "fuck" made it clear that she knew that Lizzie had indeed said that. During the dinner she kept quiet through everything, only clarifying to Lizzie that she had said that. Why is Lizzie lying about it, unless she realizes that it was mean, and maybe said it to get a reaction? I know others don't agree, but I stand firm in my belief that Heather has always shown herself to be the only true friend on this particular franchise. She was very concerned about Vicki, and looked to be hurt about what Tamra might have said about her. Yet she didn't become hysterical or automatically believe that someone she cares about would say such a thing. She took her question directly to the source. This is rare in HW land. 

[PhilMarlowe2]

My take on Lizzie is that she is like NYC Ramona in that she legitimately doesn't remember the things she does and says (when she drinks). She seemed so convinced of her truthfulness when she insisted that Tamra did not text her the night of her birthday. It just doesn't make sense that she would so boldly lie about something that could be so easily proven false. She seems to just go off half-cocked.