S05.E07: The Best Mistake Of My Life

[poeticlicensed]

11 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

When they get old enough to start digging for the boob, it's time to wean them.

Or when they start saying articulating in full sentences that it's time to breastfeed. "Mom I believe I'd like to breastfeed now" is a real clue lol

[Baltimore Betty]

21 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

When they get old enough to start digging for the boob, it's time to wean them.

They don't have to dig real hard, they are on display like a buffet for the kids.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

17 hours ago, DVDFreaker said:

Angela is such a dumbass “I do not have time to cook” what a lame excuse! 

Especially when you can see clearly that she makes time to eat.

I laughed when Larissa was on the phone with Nathalie and she told her that Eric-e said she has bad hygiene and doesn't shower for days, especially seeing all her dandruff- girl needs some head n shoulders 

[1011101010001]

Poor Larissa has cheesy butt and doesn’t shower.  

[Scout Finch]

Still watching episode but just had to pop in to say that Liz's brother has a very punchable face.

[CrazyInAlabama]

Asuelu has two half sisters in the U.S., the one in Utah, and the one in Washington State, where his mother is visiting, except the mother has a green card, so it's not really a visit, but she moved here to live with her daughter.   (This all came up on this episode).  

Edited July 28, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Haute Messe]

51 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Here I go again defending Deb. What is happening to me? 

Anyway, I feel that everything she has said so far about Coltee and Jess' relationship is right on. Why the rush? Why do you have to get married right away? Why talk of kids, you hardly know each other? I don't see anything wrong with these questions. She sees that her son is a big fekkin' moron and she's questioning why he would want to jump right back in to the same mess he was in with Larissa. Only he can't see it. Because again, moron. Jess clearly wants something from Colt. A green card. She's been pushing for it since the beginning of showing us their meet up in Chicago. She is a loud, pushy, overbearing, snotty, spoiled little bitch. Colt better watch it closely with this one because I have a feeling she's going to make him her baby daddy real soon. 

If Colt really wanted to he could move out and get a place of his own just a few miles away and check in on his mom daily with phone calls or a visit or what ever. Deb will get used to it. I think the reason he stays is financial on both of their parts. Also, Deb cooks and cleans for him so he's not going anywhere anytime soon.  

Amen. Jessie has been rude and obnoxious to Debbie since day 1 and Debbie takes the bait every time. Jessie is another unreliable translator as we could see from the subtitles that she was embellishing what her father was saying. However, I do think the Colt and Jessie are a good match. Both are repulsive and I can't imagine either one of them have a lineup of other options wanting to be with them. Debbie is only involved to this extent because TLC thinks we enjoy this bunch of crap. I don't need to see any of them again, especially in ill-fitting beach wear.

As for Asuelu and Kalani, I was under the impression that it is customary to send money back home to family in impoverished countries. Why would he be obligated to provide money for his family members living in the US,  especially when it sounds like Mother Asuelu commutes back and forth between WA and Samoa? Impoverished people can't usually afford that luxury.

If this is all TLC can come up with for HEA, this show should be dumped in the shitter.

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, Dobian said:

He had an office job looking up police reports and criminal records and things, I'm sure. 

Exactly! I can see him as some kind of desk clerk, working WITH detectives but not AS a detective 

[BravoAddict72]

Larissa complaining that Eric said she doesn't shower often made me laugh for some reason. That and cheesey butt are what got her upset? She really is clueless.

Andrei may be a stay at home dad but at one point he said that Libby should still cook and clean since that is woman's work. If he expects her to work, and do all the cooking and cleaning while he stays home that isn't fair.

When Asuela's mom and sister said to give their car back to the dealer so they could send her money I wanted to slap them. They have 2 little kids to take care of. How about she works and supports herself?

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

It was Usman's mom who was concerned over that, right?  I am sure it could be a Mother Michael thing as well.  I am so over Anglea the Abuser and her "I AM AMERICAN!" rants every ten minutes.

You’re correct! Again I’m mixing up my abrasive older White women’s Nigerian men. Michael’s mother actually seems to LIKE Angela but that opinion might change once she realizes there’s no way Ange will be totin’ her a grand baby. 

[magemaud]

2 hours ago, Dirtybubble said:

 

The walk on the beach with Colt and Jess was odd but not because of their weight.  If you look closely Colt was holding Jess by the wrist as he walked and her hand was just dangling limp.  Their hands weren't clasped around each other as you would normally hold hands with someone.  Weird. 

 

Yes, when I first saw the photo of them on the beach, after my initial revulsion, I was trying to figure out what that curled up thing was next to Colt’s junk. Then I realized it’s Jess’s dainty hand. He’s holding it like a parent walking with a child 

Edited July 27, 2020 by magemaud

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, Scout Finch said:

 

Still watching episode but just had to pop in to say that Liz's brother has a very punchable face.

 

I picture him as the type to get in bar fights with his drunken buddies 

I’m still laughing over the brilliant poster here who described Libby as a “potato face.” That’s all I will see now 

Edited July 27, 2020 by magemaud

[charmed1]

5 hours ago, magemaud said:

If Michael's mother was concerned about Angela bringing him to America to "be a slave", after that pizza party there should be no doubt in her mind that's exactly what's in store for him. 

 

3 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

It was Usman's mom who was concerned over that, right?  I am sure it could be a Mother Michael thing as well.  

Usman’s mother was afraid that Lisa would enslave him, but it was Michael’s mother who expressed concern about her son’s safety considering the proliferation of guns in U.S. How fitting that Angela the pig gifted her with a Jesus gun purse upon meeting her.

Edited July 27, 2020 by charmed1

[Grifter Lives]

Those two studs, Eric-y and his roommate, have a big red mug that says, "Hot Mama."  Yet, it's Larissa whom everyone thinks is ultra-sexy.  Maybe it's the halo effect.  

Larissa acts like she's the homeowner.  She tells the roommate that she thinks he'll be a good roommate and he must behave while she's on probation.  (Eric asks why she's on probation, as if he doesn't know.)  Then, she orders a bed and talks about putting her touch on everything with redecorating.  

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, BravoAddict72 said:

If he expects her to work, and do all the cooking and cleaning while he stays home that isn't fair.

Since he uses the same loofah on his ass and his face maybe it’s for the best that he doesn’t cook or clean.

[Haute Messe]

3 hours ago, Uncle JUICE said:

They're making it seem like he has a Mike Ehrmentraut-esque backstory when in reality he was never in any way anything other than an intern at best. 

Love this.

[1011101010001]

1 minute ago, lizajane said:

Love this.

Well we know what happened to Mike so Andrei better watch out.

[Haute Messe]

2 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

Well we know what happened to Mike so Andrei better watch out.

Lol, Chuck ain't no Walter!

[HorrrGoodnight]

6 hours ago, Dobian said:

I knew this reminded me of  something...

 

He's not a baby duck, he's a full grown duck! Don't demoralize him like that!! 😂

[endure]

What was up with Coltee’s hungover hair and squintIng eyes 🥴

[DanaMB]

On 7/24/2020 at 11:14 PM, Frozendiva said:

I probably would have been Angela at that meat market. Being hot outside, not feeling all that well would make me vomit too.

I hate to say it, but I know I would have reacted badly, too. However, I would have suffered in silence until away from others. 

[DanaMB]

On 7/25/2020 at 3:37 PM, athousandclowns said:

Right out of the gate Libby’s father bitching about the walk from one gate to another.  

Which is just asinine. There have been plenty of times I’ve had to run across the airport to get to a gate when flying within the US. Asshat. 

[Mothra]

Just now, DanaMB said:

Which is just asinine. There have been plenty of times I’ve had to run across the airport to get to a gate when flying within the US. Asshat. 

I have never encountered two ruder, unpleasant, belligerent and ungrateful guests in my home in my entire life..  Thank god.  Andre is a total asshat but his restraint has been unbelievable up to the point where the physical stuff begins.  I'm not sure I could have behaved as well as he did.

[1011101010001]

12 minutes ago, Mothra said:

I have never encountered two ruder, unpleasant, belligerent and ungrateful guests in my home in my entire life..  Thank god.  Andre is a total asshat but his restraint has been unbelievable up to the point where the physical stuff begins.  I'm not sure I could have behaved as well as he did.

Maybe they can do even better and plug the toilets while they’re at it.

[DanaMB]

23 minutes ago, Mothra said:

his restraint has been unbelievable up to the point where the physical stuff begins. 

I hate to say this, because I hate violence, but I love how he stands up in the preview when the brother bows up. I’d love to see Andrei knock him out. punchable face indeed. 

[endure]

20 hours ago, Adeejay said:

Say what you want about Miss Debbie, but I thought  Jess rude and disrespectful.  The "eff you" was not called for. She is over acting and doing too much.   

The fact that Angela  kept saying that she couldn't wait to see the look on Mama Michael's face while he is cooking, tells me their storyline is scripted.  I don't understand why Michael didn't go to the market by himself and buy the goat meat, oil and rice.  

 

Agree it seemed so over the top and scripted.  But in fairness to Angela I actually liked the idea of having pizza and Mama especially did seem to enjoy it, she’s probably sick of plantain, rice and goat 🐐 

I’m also on board with Jessie being rude and disrespectful, she seems more than a handful compared to Larissa even 😬

It seems odd to me that Coltee thinks he needs to take care of his aging mother, when she is not an old woman and is more than capable physically to take care of herself.  She probably feels like she has to take care of him.

Edited July 27, 2020 by endure

[1011101010001]

It appears that Debbie has no friends so Colt is her sole social and emotional outlet.  Sick.

[endure]

18 hours ago, Bees52 said:

I don't remember Paul having dogs before he moved to Brazil. I think he just got them and they're going to be guard dogs for the house. He's turning into Higgins from Magnum, PI!

I think he had them down in Brazil at one point too, they appear to be beautiful and well trained dogs.

[Frozendiva]

7 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

It appears that Debbie has no friends so Colt is her sole social and emotional outlet.  Sick.

These days there are tons of activities for older adults. Inexpensive courses, sport activities like pickle ball, walking in malls, volunteering, taking animals at the shelters for walks, etc. 

[bravofan27]

3 hours ago, Scout Finch said:

Still watching episode but just had to pop in to say that Liz's brother has a very punchable face.

He has the same face as Libby. They have the same nose and werid mouth and teeth. 

[poeticlicensed]

7 minutes ago, Frozendiva said:

These days there are tons of activities for older adults. Inexpensive courses, sport activities like pickle ball, walking in malls, volunteering, taking animals at the shelters for walks, etc. 

I think Debbie likes to drinkee and that interferes with any interests she might have. 

[lilysmom]

9 hours ago, greekmom said:

That  would be the logical thing to do but when have any of these yahoos been logical??

I couldn't believe the attitude of Mom and sister.  First, they come before the kids. Second, Mom is lazy (uh get a job? A hobby? What about going to the craft store and getting materials to weave baskets?) The sister doing the money sign was just so bad and insulting.  

 

And one of them said something like, "Your FAMILY comes first" when discussing the $ (meaning mom and sis, of course).  Asuelu's answer SHOULD have been, "You're right, and my FAMILY is Kalani and the boys!"

[bravofan27]

Did someone promise Libby's dad and stupid brother that Maldova is exactly like the US? They are hell bent on pointing out all the differences and making it clear that US is the best superior way and Maldova sucks.

"I had to walk so far in this airport!"

"There are only departures here, no arrivals!"

"Everyone is leaving, no one is coming!"

"This place is grey, nothing like Tampa. It's dreary."

"This looks like where we would get mugged."

"The drivers are out for themselves!"

"I can't believe they cooked all this food in that super tiny little kitchen!"

Oh my gosh, it's like if they have even the slightest bit of fun and acceptance of a different country they are approving of Andrei. The hatred between Andrei and the brother and father, I think, is very real and extremely toxic.

Kalani's eye rolling at everything Ansuelu says is getting on my last nerve. I can't stand either of them. 

Edited July 27, 2020 by bravofan27

[endure]

10 hours ago, steff13 said:

I can't with Libby and her family anymore.  I felt bad for Andrei at the family dinner.  Libby admitted that they agreed for him to stay home with the baby, but then says she can change her mind.   Sure, she can change her mind, but that's something you discuss in private as a couple, not something you use to attack him at a dinner with your families.  And it's unfair of her father to say sitting around playing video games is easier than working; being a stay at home parent it not easy.  Eleanor seems to be well cared for, which is down to Andrei when Libby is at work. 

Completely agree and for them to be so disrespectful in his home when his parents have gone out of their way to feed and celebrate with them, they are disgusting.  I also don’t understand why they would suddenly be interested in Andrei’s past after all this time.  It is so hard to know when this show is just horribly scripted or people can actually be this ignorant and belligerent.

[athousandclowns]

30 minutes ago, endure said:

I think he had them down in Brazil at one point too, they appear to be beautiful and well trained dogs.

I remember when he was sad about leaving them but also wondered the cost because I’ve paid for a weekend and it’s costly. Maybe he traded cleaning up poo in exchange for boarding. 

[1011101010001]

41 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

He has the same face as Libby. They have the same nose and werid mouth and teeth. 

They almost look inbred.  As does Chuck.

[lilysmom]

I couldn't help but notice that Colte's left moob was just out there searching for the sun, while the right one was strategically draped with his shirt, not even making a brief appearance. Artistically reminded me of so many of those classic Greek statues. 

Also, when I was a child, one of the things I really enjoyed for some reason, was when my mom would be vacuuming and she would take the hose and pull my hair into it. It would then stand on end, much like Colt's the morning after the dinner party. I wonder if Jess was doing any vacuuming??

 

[Mrs. Hanson]

2 hours ago, DanaMB said:

Which is just asinine. There have been plenty of times I’ve had to run across the airport to get to a gate when flying within the US. Asshat. 

I had to stand in a line at Denver that was epic.  Not running for gates, but yes, Chuck, when we travel we all have get inconvienced at times.

 

58 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

Did someone promise Libby's dad and stupid brother that Maldova is exactly like the US? They are hell bent on pointing out all the differences and making it clear that US is the best superior way and Maldova sucks.

"I had to walk so far in this airport!"

"There are only departures here, no arrivals!"

"Everyone is leaving, no one is coming!"

"This place is grey, nothing like Tampa. It's dreary."

"This looks like where we would get mugged."

"The drivers are out for themselves!"

"I can't believe they cooked all this food in that super tiny little kitchen!"

Oh my gosh, it's like if they have even the slightest bit of fun and acceptance of a different country they are approving of Andrei. The hatred between Andrei and the brother and father, I think, is very real and extremely toxic.

Kalani's eye rolling at everything Ansuelu says is getting on my last nerve. I can't stand either of them. 

Spot and may I offer an addition?  "Will we make it back in one piece?" when that "thing" fell off the car.  

 

2 hours ago, Mothra said:

I have never encountered two ruder, unpleasant, belligerent and ungrateful guests in my home in my entire life..  Thank god.  Andre is a total asshat but his restraint has been unbelievable up to the point where the physical stuff begins.  I'm not sure I could have behaved as well as he did.

I was actually okay when the brother said "Was this guy really a cop?" as a way to start conversation.  But when Radu said "Yes, for a year" it should have been dropped.  But no, off they go, airing out their grievences for everyone and Jesus to see and hear.  Can't wait for the Coven to show up.  Maybe Anddrrei should have pulled out the family's rapsheets as proof of what a good detective he was!!!!

[CraftyHazel]

1 hour ago, bravofan27 said:

"There are only departures here, no arrivals!"

Of all the ignorant things Chuck and Charlie said, this takes the cake.  If there are no arrivals, idiots, then how did you get there?!?

[Mrs. Hanson]

5 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

Here I go again defending Deb. What is happening to me? 

Anyway, I feel that everything she has said so far about Coltee and Jess' relationship is right on. Why the rush? Why do you have to get married right away? Why talk of kids, you hardly know each other? I don't see anything wrong with these questions. She sees that her son is a big fekkin' moron and she's questioning why he would want to jump right back in to the same mess he was in with Larissa. Only he can't see it. Because again, moron. Jess clearly wants something from Colt. A green card. She's been pushing for it since the beginning of showing us their meet up in Chicago. She is a loud, pushy, overbearing, snotty, spoiled little bitch. Colt better watch it closely with this one because I have a feeling she's going to make him her baby daddy real soon. 

I know @bichonblitz said this so I want give proper credit.  I agree that everything Debbie has said makes perfect sense.  If my son was less than a year out from a bitter divorce, and a new young this shows up, talking kids and a K-1 I would be saying the same thing.  And I would like to think that when/if a woman called me a bitch or referred to me as a bitch, that would be game over for my son.  Yes, they are close....so friggin' what.  Be glad he respects his mom.  Could be worse.   Should they live apart?  If he ever gets married, yes.  That is just best for all parties.

And here is a tip, Colt:  Next time you want to look hungover, have production use a a little less gel in your hair.  Hungover people rarely go for food that fast.

Per Kalani and still nursing the older one:  When I was younger and had littles, I had a friend whose two year older daughter would tug at her shirt and ask for "yum yums" - time to wean!  Yeah, when they can verbalize it, time to wean.

Edited July 28, 2020 by Mrs. Hanson

[Hangin Out]

8 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I know @bichonblitz said this so I want give proper credit.  I agree that everything Debbie has said makes perfect sense.  If my son was less than a year out from a bitter divorce, and a new young this shows up, talking kids and a K-1 I would be saying the same thing.  And I would like to think that when/if a woman called me a bitch or referred to me as a bitch, that would be game over for my son.  Yes, they are close....so friggin' what.  Be glad he respects his mom.  Could be worse.   Should they live apart?  If he ever gets married, yes.  That is just best for all parties.

And here is a tip, Colt:  Next time you want to look hungover, have production use a a little less gel in your hair.  Hungover people rarely go for food that fast.

Per Kalani and still nursing the older one:  When I was younger and had littles, I had a friend whose two year older daughter would tug at her shirt and ask for "yum yums" - time to wean!  Yeah, when they can verbalize it, time to wean.

I’m glad you saw I didn’t post the above.  This is happening lately .. don’t know why.

[Hangin Out]

6 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Pauls wife is just as dirty and lazy as Paul. I agree they certainly need curtains, though. 

She walks around doing nothing but criticizing him.  Put the baby down, get to work and help the guy clean up the place.  She has no ambition and looks like she can’t lift a feather.

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 7/25/2020 at 7:23 PM, Baltimore Betty said:

I went thru the fibroid thing, they are painful when they start to lose their blood supply, having a period with the tumors was painful beyond belief and the blood clots were nightmarish, Angela is not in pain which makes me think it is not fibroids. 

She said she hasn't had a period for several years.

 

Quote

Her husband had to allow her to seek medical help???? Yikes, that would be grounds for murder and no jury would convict her for it.

Maybe not medical help in general, but just the hysterectomy as the treatment?  I was researching Christian healthshare programs as an alternative to traditional medical insurance, and found a provision in one that for a woman's hysterectomy to be considered for sharing (reimbursed) she had to get a second opinion from a physician authorized by the healthshare ministry.  Not a single other procedure required that.

I had my fibroids worked on back when you had to fight not to have a hysterectomy.  Had a doctor refuse to see me again as a patient if I chose to have an embolization.  So I have a history of earnestly avoiding a hysterectomy, and yet the provision in the healthshare program still grated mightily.

 

18 hours ago, Frozendiva said:

Angela and Michael - no, the open air market is not what Ange is used to and if it is a hot day, it could be pretty rank.

I cannot handle the smell of the seafood section in U.S. grocery stores, so I suspect I would have been suffering in that market.  And when I'm in Chinatown, I make an effort not to look in store windows because I know what I'm likely to see hanging there.  Plus it looked hotter than hell where she was.  I would have been suffering.  But in silence, of course.  Or just removed myself from the premises, without histrionics.

So I was feeling it...until she reached for a cigarette.  The thought of a cigarette being the antidote to a smelly market with goat heads staring at you really made me want to gag.

[Meowwww]

10 hours ago, poeticlicensed said:

They are from Tampa, like me, and if you fly just about anywhere from here, you have to change planes in Atlanta, Charlotte, NYC, or Washington. There are almost no direct flights anywhere, particularly international flights. And only the luckiest of us actually find that the gate for our connecting flight is in the same conscourse. I swear sometimes I hear "Welcome to the plane train" for days after I fly through ATL. 

It just seems weird to me that Libby said her family hasn’t travelled internationally.   Chuck seems like he would travel, but I guess not.  
And you haven’t lived until you’ve hiked through the Minneapolis airport from gate 42c.  

[Meowwww]

8 hours ago, poeticlicensed said:

They had the stereotypical American attitude of wanting the world spread at their feet and god forbid they actually have to put forth some effort. I traveled in Europe several times in last few years and I whenever I heard someone complaining in an airport, train station or hotel, it was always an American. Last time we were in Italy the trains all went on strike. We had figured out long ago that with international travel you just have to go with the flow and deal. The number of Americans either paralyzed not knowing or understanding what to do or complaining to the ticket agents who frankly don;t give a crap was hilarious. I had done my homework (thanks google) and knew how to deal with and got to my destinantion only slightly delayed. Am I surprised that Family Libby was bitching? Nope, not a bit. 

We play “ spot the American “ every time we travel overseas.  We are never wrong lol.  Tons of people like Libby’s family.  It’s embarrassing.  
Pole had a business for a minute training police dogs I think?  He’s the kind of guy who spent all his show money on boarding his dogs (probably $1000 a month) and can’t afford dinner.  I’m a horse owner, I know lots of horse people like that. 

Edited July 28, 2020 by Meowwww

[Meowwww]

7 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

If I was Paul’s wife, I would have him take me to Walmart, buy some disinfectant, curtains, Clorox and clean that place up ASAP.  Did they have a crib?  She just stands there.  Man can’t clean like a woman.  That refridge was not clean enough.  I didn’t read all the posts yet, so don’t know what everyone is saying.  I’m going to page 1 now.

Lol!  My husband cleans WAY better than I do.  I hate cleaning.  He can make it spotless in 10 minutes, while if I had spent an hour on it, it wouldn’t be as clean.  His mom is OCD clean so he learned from her lol. 

[poeticlicensed]

2 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

We play “ spot the American “ every time we travel overseas.  We are never wrong lol.  Tons of people like Libby’s family.  It’s embarrassing.  
Pole had a business for a minute training police dogs I think?  He’s the kind of guy who spent all his show money on boarding his dogs (probably $1000 a month) and can’t afford dinner.  I’m a horse owner, I know lots of horse people like that. 

The baseball caps, team jerseys and big white sneakers are a dead giveaway. 

[poeticlicensed]

Hey mother Areola, its 2020 not 1955. Most women support their families and dont expect to be supported 100%.  Areolas life of priviledge has clearly not done her any favors. Otherwise she wouldn't still be living off her parents 

[Meowwww]

4 minutes ago, poeticlicensed said:

The baseball caps, team jerseys and big white sneakers are a dead giveaway. 

And the fact that we are louder and....more large.... (I’m not skinny.  I do, however, try to be very respectful). 

[zenme]

6 hours ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

Especially when you can see clearly that she makes time to eat.

I laughed when Larissa was on the phone with Nathalie and she told her that Eric-e said she has bad hygiene and doesn't shower for days, especially seeing all her dandruff- girl needs some head n shoulders 

Omigoodness! Did she say that? I thought she talked about blow jobs?