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S12.E25: Reunion Part 2


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Kenya and Porsha discuss where their friendship went wrong, which leads to a spicy exchange between Kenya and Nene. The ladies open up about their past relationship struggles and Eva breaks down while talking about her journey with her daughter. Porsha and Eva have a heated exchange when Porsha calls Eva out for being a shady friend. Nene goes missing, leaving Andy and the ladies to wonder if she’ll return to defend herself.

Airdate 05.17.2020

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I think Kenya is a vile person.  I don’t trust her as far as I can throw her.  However, when I watch this show, I don’t choose favorites.  I don’t really like any of them.  So I just call em like I see em, and I was a little surprised at some of the things Kenya said in this installation.

So the big texts that Porsha wanted to reveal were that Kenya didn’t think Cynthia was a good friend to her?  This is the gossip that spanned two episodes?  Holy shit.  And then Porsha said the damning information was allegedly something Kenya told Porsha on the phone.  That’s convenient.  

I actually thought it was mature of Cynthia to say that everyone talks about each other on the show.  For Porsha to pretend otherwise is kind of dishonest. 

Cynthia didn’t gain two daughters, contrary to Andy’s claim.  I am so sick of them not knowing the basics of what a family is on this show.  Cynthia is living with her fiancé and he has kids.  If they get married, they will be her step-daughters.  Who doesn’t know this?

Wow, so Kenya wasn’t lying about Shamea texted her about the water breaking.  A picture is really worth a thousand words.  

It wasn’t fun shade when Kenya stormed Marlo’s wig launch, and it wasn’t fun shade when Shamea drank Kenya’s hair care product to prove it was water.  Two wrongs don’t make a right when there are different players involved, though, Kenya, hello!

How does Marlo hang her breasts out there so blatantly when they are completely different sizes?  I understand that can be a natural occurrence, but some styles are your friend, and some aren’t.  This was not one of them.  

So Gregg was fucking the maid?  That was worth the price of admission.  

I have a question for Tanya:  if there was nothing to hide about cookie lady, why reveal the wig?  That makes Tanya look as guilty and insecure as anything.  Since I’m basically positive my husband isn’t cheating on me with a cookie lady, if someone said that, I’d kind of let it just roll off my shoulders.  The longer they talk about cookie lady, and what Cynthia “knew,” the more it fuels the fire.  Something definitely went on with Paul that wasn’t above-board.  I feel like who facilitated bringing cookie lady onto set was irrelevant.  They all seem to be saying there is something there with the cookie lady.  Kandi was the only one making sense.  Why doesn’t Tanya just address cookie lady full on, instead of talking about filming?  I think I know why.  

I am really not ok with Porsha’s relationship if she’s going to keep taking this cheating shit from him.  “What was he doing out at a diner with a bunch of women at 4 am?”  “Well, we’re in a different place now”?  So he cheated, or at least acted a fool, again, and she’s just writing it off?  She reminds me of Teresa Giudice constantly covering up for Joe’s cheating until she stopped.  I’ll like Porsha again once she stops covering for Dennis.  

I love Kandi laughing at Nene constantly.  Kandi is the one person with whom Nene can’t hold her own, and it kills her.  What does “learn from the lunchbox” mean coming from Nene to Kandi?  That Kandi should protect her belongings?  That made no sense in this context, but the world wouldn’t be spinning on its axis if Nene wasn’t shouting nonsensically.  

So after screaming that she wasn’t talking about Kandi on YouTube, Nene admitted she was talking about Kandi and called her “unforgettable” before realizing it was “forgettable.”  Well played, Nene. 

Hopefully Nene left to change more than just her tampon.  

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1 hour ago, LibertarianSlut said:

Cynthia didn’t gain two daughters, contrary to Andy’s claim.  I am so sick of them not knowing the basics of what a family is on this show.  Cynthia is living with her fiancé and he has kids.  If they get married, they will be her step-daughters.  Who doesn’t know this?

Many people don't consider step-kids as "step-children." When they marry someone with children, they regard those children as their children, not just "step children."  I think Kandi regards Kaela as her daughter, not her step-daughter.

1 hour ago, LibertarianSlut said:

 Why doesn’t Tanya just address cookie lady full on, instead of talking about filming?  I think I know why.  

I am really not ok with Porsha’s relationship if she’s going to keep taking this cheating shit from him.

Everyone claims they will dump a cheater, but 99% of the time they will take the cheater back.  Paul and Tanya have their arrangement.  Tanya doesn't talk about or complain about her arrangement, so it doesn't bother me.  While I wish Porsha would move on from Dennis, it's not that easy like people claim it is.  I am glad Porsha admitted she rushed into this relationship and I hope that she does not marry Dennis for a very long time...she really doesn't need to. I haven't seen where Dennis is doing the work to take responsibility for his actions, not blame Porsha for his actions and letting Porsha take the lead in the pace of the relationship.  Porsha should take her time with this guy and not rush into any marriage with him.

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The boobs, the boobs, I think I am going to have nightmares about them. I had two nightmares about my hair. I got it cut on Friday, I come home and right as I come in the door my hubby said, Your hair, oh my god, your hair!! Later he asked if Joanna brought in a large trash bag to hold all my hair when she swept up. The nightmare that was my hair is now replaced with the nightmare of all that cleavage.

Cynthia, raising your hand that Kenya with the marching band at Marlo’s launch party, not that was just downright vile. Cynthia, Kenya almost ruined Mike’s proposal but yet she remains your current ride or die, please, that is just vile.

Porsha saying that Dennis wants a small waiting because of something about people judging him. I think Dennis’s definition of a small wedding consists of 0 guests and 0 participants. 
 

I will be stunned in the Night Angel on The Masked Singer isn’t Kandi Burruss. That would make a Nene even matter. If it is, I hope when she takes of her mask the first thing she ways is “Hi, Nene” with a small wave.

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33 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

Many people don't consider step-kids as "step-children." When they marry someone with children, they regard those children as their children, not just "step children."  I think Kandi regards Kaela as her daughter, not her step-daughter.

It’s not about how they consider themselves though; it’s what their status is.  I feel the same way about Tanya and Paul calling each other “husband” and “wife.”  Those are specific legal statuses that they haven’t earned.  

Cynthia can love her fiancé’s daughters to the moon, and they will not be her step-daughters until she marries Mike.  Once she marries Mike, she can take a bullet for her step-daughters and they will still be “step” unless or until Cynthia adopts them (I don’t know if it’s legal to adopt an adult in Georgia, but it is legal to adopt one in Florida, or at least it was when I took the bar).  

These aren’t subjective definitions.  They have objective meanings.  “Step-daughter” vs “daughter” isn’t a measure of love, it’s a matter of a legal relationship.  I just don’t know why people like Andy would bungle these terms.  It makes me feel like we’re in Soviet Russia where everyone just called each other “comrade.”

33 minutes ago, drivethroo said:

Everyone claims they will dump a cheater, but 99% of the time they will take the cheater back

I am not sure I agree with that number.  If my husband—not an ephemeral fiancé, but my husband—cheated on me while I was pregnant and it played out in a public way and he was a reluctant participant at best in therapy...I wouldn’t just leave him, I’d use every legal remedy available to, let’s just keep it kind, and “create distance.”  If we weren’t even married?!?  Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya, mufucah!

Phaedra did it.  Cynthia didn’t have kids with Peter, but she got rid of him.  I don’t think they fall into the 1% of women who don’t put up with cheating.  I think the idea that 99% of women will take the cheater back tells a self-defeating, negative story about women, and I don’t find even anecdotal truth in it.  

I never claimed it was easy to move on.  Very little worth achieving is “that easy.”  Porsha already went through a divorce, made something of herself when she doesn’t have much in the way of brains, and she had a c-section on TV.  She can leave Dennis.  If chooses not to, and opts to co-sign his bad behavior, that’s her right.  It just doesn’t stop me from losing respect for her.  I just don’t respect that behavior.  Especially because she is covering for him.  If she would have told us the whole story—which, as I always contend, became our business when she signed up for the big Bravo $—and said, “ok, he cheats, I love him, and we wear condoms when we have sex, and I don’t have the heart to leave him,” I’d say at least she is being real.  It is the making of the excuses and pretending things aren’t as dismal as they are that make a very sad statement about Porsha and her choices.  

ETA:  My husband just looked up the numbers of the survey by The Health Testing Center’s outcomes of admitting to cheating and 54.5% broke up immediately, 30% tried to stay together but broke up eventually, and only 15.6% were still together at the time of the survey.

Edited by LibertarianSlut
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I miss when these reunions were only one episode. I found this boring. Too much screeching and witless remarks.

Eva's segment was touching, of course, but I'm not so sure I buy that she and Kevin weren't in a relationship. That sounded like spin to me.  Sure, it probably wasn't a years long relationship, but given how she told it, it sounded as if they were just fuck buddies who have a kid. Meanwhile, there's pictures of them together all over Al Gore's Internet. I guess it's possible that he just could've been a guy that she was in a situationship with, but I dunno. Glad that she got out of the toxicity and leveled up, though.

I thought it was weak when Kandi said she didn't give a fuck about cookie lady. I get that she wasn't there, but to say, "I wasn't there, so I don't have an opinion. Maybe if I were there, I might've said something," was trash. You watched the episode, you saw what went down, and you have nothing to say? Tanya isn't asking to be rescued, but as she said, it's the principle of the matter.

I can't stand Kenya, but I give her credit for being unflappable in her wrongness. She knows that she should be the last person there discussing anyone's infidelity and marriage given her own marital woes, but she keeps dishing it out.

As for the text with Shamea, according to Porsha, the text happened a month before Shamea gave birth. It was a false alarm. But Kenya made it seem as if it happened on the day of the birth.

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Sick of Andy's bias against Kenya but cant remember the exchange. I know he made an unfair summary of what Kenya had just said. Eva reacted. I laughed when she said it again.

Anyone remember?

NeNe was awful. As always.

Thanks for the "Al Gore's internet" laugh sheenieb! I just woke our dog snorting!

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1 hour ago, Audpaud said:

Sick of Andy's bias against Kenya but cant remember the exchange. I know he made an unfair summary of what Kenya had just said. Eva reacted. I laughed when she said it again.

Anyone remember?

NeNe was awful. As always.

Thanks for the "Al Gore's internet" laugh sheenieb! I just woke our dog snorting!

He said "So you can come after other people's businesses but they can't come after yours?"

😂 He really doesn't like her and can't even attempt to hide his bias. 

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haven't seen where Dennis is doing the work to take responsibility for his actions, not blame Porsha for his actions and letting Porsha take the lead in the pace of the relationship. 

It was Porsha's fault, she had the nerve to get fat while pregnant!

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3 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

It’s not about how they consider themselves though; it’s what their status is.  I feel the same way about Tanya and Paul calling each other “husband” and “wife.”  Those are specific legal statuses that they haven’t earned.  

But who are any of us to tell Cynthia she can't consider Mike's daughters her daughters?   If they're fine with it, who cares?  By that logic, Kandi shouldn't ever refer to Kaela as her daughter and Kroy shouldn't be referring to Brielle & Ariana as his daughters.

And definitely Michael shouldn't be considering Marley his daughter or spending one red dime clothing or feeding her because Marley is not his daughter and she hasn't earned the right to be called his daughter.  Eva should be paying Michael rent for Marley's room and board and Michael needs to instruct his parents never to give any gifts to Marley because she's not his child.  In fact, he needs to snatch his last name back and make her go back to being "McCall."

As far as Paul/Tanya or Porsha/Dennis not "earning the right" to call each other husband and wife, just because it's not "legal" doesn't mean it doesn't exist.  If two gay people legally marry today, but a Republican legislature struck down gay marriage, does that mean those people should no longer consider themselves married? Because some random people say *EYE* get to decide whether you can consider yourself married or not?  Black people couldn't legally get married until 1865 but they considered themselves married.

The point is, it's nobody's business except the people involved if Paul & Tanya consider themselves married, if Michael considers Marley his daughter or if Cynthia considers Mike's daughters to now be her daughters.  We can't dictate the relationship people have with each other because we don't like it or it's not legal or "earned."

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If my husband—not an ephemeral fiancé, but my husband—cheated on me while I was pregnant and it played out in a public way and he was a reluctant participant at best in therapy...I wouldn’t just leave him, I’d use every legal remedy available to, let’s just keep it kind, and “create distance.”  If we weren’t even married?!?  Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya, mufucah!

Again, everyone says that, and the main people who claim they would leave are the main people who end up staying.  They're not going to leave until it happens 3, 4, 6, 8 times.

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Sure, it probably wasn't a years long relationship, but given how she told it, it sounded as if they were just fuck buddies who have a kid

From what I understand, they were just f*ck buddies and she got pregnant and wanted to be a real couple.  Sadly for her, he is a psycho to the point where even Fist Brown is giving him the side eye.

Edited by drivethroo
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1 hour ago, drivethroo said:

But who are any of us to tell Cynthia she can't consider Mike's daughters her daughters?   If they're fine with it, who cares?  By that logic, Kandi shouldn't ever refer to Kaela as her daughter and Kroy shouldn't be referring to Brielle & Ariana as his daughters.

It was Andy who said it.  He said that, living over on the West Coast, Cynthia has two new step-daughters, and Cynthia just acquiesced.  So we don’t know what Cynthia prefers to call Mike’s daughters.

I care, because it’s improper use of language, it’s that simple.  What they want to call each other behind closed doors is not of interest to me.  But if one wanders into the public square talking about one’s “daughter,” I find it helpful when they are talking about their daughter, not their son, not their niece, not their step-daughter, because it fosters effective communication. 

If we’re talking about Eva, Marley and Michael, I have no idea where the idea came from that one can’t give gifts to a child that they did not adopt.  This isn’t Cinderella with the Evil Stepmother.  A step-parent can parent a child and love them like their own.  That love just doesn’t change their status, was all that I said up thread.  I don’t know where the idea that Michael couldn’t care for his stepdaughter in a paternal way originated, but it didn’t originate with me. 

I don’t know why Kandi would refer to Kaela as her daughter.  Kaela already has a mom, so that would seem a little disrespectful.  Also, Kandi doesn’t think of Kaela as a daughter, because she has said several times that she wants to spend on Kaela like she spends on Riley, but Todd wouldn’t let her.  If Kaela were Kandi’s daughter, Kandi would just spend on her the way she spends on Riley.  That’s a strange example, because it doesn’t seem like anyone involved—Kandi, Kaela, or Todd—want Kaela to be Kandi’s daughter.  I think they’re all fine with step status.  

Kroy would absolutely refer to Ariana and Brielle as his daughters, as he adopted them, so it would be incredibly strange and incorrect for him to call them his stepdaughters.  

To the rest, people can treat each other however they want and make agreements that benefit one party at the other’s expense, or deals that are mutually beneficial, or any other combination, and it doesn’t make them family.  I used the examples upthread that Cynthia could love these girls to the moon and back and she can take bullets for them, but they’re not family, and they won’t be family until a marriage and/or adoption occurs.  There’s no value judgment attached to that statement; it’s just how things are.  

I didn’t make these rules.  I’m also not going to pretend that family is a social construct with a subjective definition.  If parents called themselves kids, and kids called themselves parents, could we have eight-year-olds telling 35 year olds what to do with valid, legitimate authority?  I don’t see how that could be possible.  

I think we would have a terrible time navigating if a family were a social construct.  So if Tanya and Paul are married if they consider themselves married, if would stand to reason that I would be divorced if I said I was divorced.  So, on Sunday I can be married, Monday be divorced, and Tuesday married again (albeit, to a different man), as long as that’s what’s going on inside my head and everyone consents?  This is how I read this argument.  

This reminds me of that Abraham Lincoln quote where he said, “How many legs does a dog have if you call his tail a leg?  Four.  Saying that a tail is a leg doesn’t make it a leg.”

I’m not dictating a relationship’s contours; I’m saying there already stand labels that are correct and incorrect to use, and if someone—in this case Andy—calls it something it’s not, I’m going to say something 100% of the time.  A lot of people confuse “adoption” with “step” for some reason, and if someone were to ask Andy how it is to finally have a stepson, I would say that person was confused, and I’d correct them.  That’s not my subjective preference; that’s someone saying something that is incorrect and counter factual.

I’m also not convinced of the logical underpinning of the argument that essentially states that “if there were some people at some time who were denied the privilege of marriage, then it stands to reason that people who are not being denied the right to marry—Tanya and Paul—may be married if they say ‘husband’ and ‘wife’.”  I think that would be a tough pill especially for Paul to swallow, as it does not appear that he wants to be married to Tanya at this point in time.  But she becomes his wife if he placates her with the oldest trick in the book by calling her “wife” or “wifey”?  Wouldn’t that be an affront to his civil rights to suddenly make him married when he didn’t consent?

I wish I had the power to make the rules of earth, but, alas, all I have the power to do is learn them and then call balls and strikes.  

1 hour ago, drivethroo said:

Again, everyone says that, and the main people who claim they would leave are the main people who end up staying.  They're not going to leave until it happens 3, 4, 6, 8 times. 

I would need to see empirical evidence to back up this data.  Upon viewing the 99% projection empirically, it turned out not to be true.  This is a projection, but I don’t know from where it emerges, so I can’t indulge it at this point in time.

I do find and appreciate the irony of the situation where one argues on the one hand that people can make statements about their status, and those statements are necessarily self-full filling (Tanya and Paul are husband and wife if they say they are), and on the other hand, when I make a statement about how I would walk away from any man who cheated on me, that statement is met with “everyone says that,” and just by virtue of my saying that, it is indicative that I would stay in an abusive (I think cheating is abuse) relationship! 😱

Why don’t we just dispense with all pretense and say, who is to define whether they have been cheated on?  If Porsha considers herself cheated on, but Dennis decided he didn’t cheat, because he subjectively doesn’t feel like he was cheating when he was sticking his hot dog in other women, then the logic proffered would dictate that both things could be true at once.

I find that mind-boggling, but to each his own.  

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12 hours ago, dosodog said:

"Porsha from Atlanta has a question".....

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

 

 

Porsha cracked me up a bunch of times - her facial expressions, “Nay-nay down” - too funny!

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Must be pretty interesting for Cynthia to be sharing that space with Mike and FOUR young women - she probably longs to sit on her dock at Lake Bailey all by herself.

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7 hours ago, drivethroo said:

From what I understand, they were just f*ck buddies and she got pregnant and wanted to be a real couple.  Sadly for her, he is a psycho to the point where even Fist Brown is giving him the side eye.

I think she is now downplaying the relationship.  If it was as nonchalant as she says, why would she have given Marley his last name?  If I had ever had a baby as a single mother, you best believe it would have my  last name.

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Every time they showed Cynthia, she seemed mad/bored.  I do wonder if she's questioning how Kenya treated her this year, but is trying to save face. But then, she was the only one to raise her hand about the marching band.

Eva.  How is it she can never remember her shade?  She almost is never "I said what I said", but  almost always, "I dont remember" or "I didn't " EVEN WITH VIDEO CLEARLY SHOWING SHE DID!  And yet?  She has no problem tossing her opinion in on other people during the conversation. 

I enjoyed Andy listening to Kenya's delusional reasons about going after another person's business and then Andy wrapping it up with your sarcastic, basic "It's okay for you to do it, but not other people".  

Porsha was on fire again!  Out of all the ladies, she had me laughing the most.  I almost want her to be center peach next year.

When it comes to Kandi and Mayday Nay Nay?  Andy's mute button is everything......

As to non married people calling themselves husband and wife!  From my experience....we didnt refer to ourselves as husband/wife in the beginning.  I took the Joy Behar route and called him my spousal equivalent. But!  People just can't handle it.  People outside of our relationship called us "husband/wife".  After awhile, you just stop correcting people and go with it.  Because they are going to call you husband/wife anyways--it is ingrained in the brain.

 

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6 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

I care, because it’s improper use of language, it’s that simple.  What they want to call each other behind closed doors is not of interest to me.  But if one wanders into the public square talking about one’s “daughter,” I find it helpful when they are talking about their daughter, not their son, not their niece, not their step-daughter, because it fosters effective communication. 

Why would Cynthia, Kandi, Kroy or Michael (or Marlo) need to refer to or introduce their step-children as their "step-children" to help you or anyone else effectively communicate with them? How does Cynthia referring to Mike's daughters as her "step daughters" and not her "daughters" help foster effective communication? Are you going to treat Mike's daughters differently if you know they're not Cynthia's biological daughters?

It doesn't foster effective communication.  Anyone who wants to know the exact legal relationship between two people does so because they want to know how much respect they need to place upon the people in that relationship.  If we then discover in talking to Kandi that Kaela is not Kandi's child, then we don't need to value that relationship that much as we would if we discover Riley IS Kandi's child.

This value placement is exactly why Cynthia, Michael, Kandi, Kroy and Marlo refer to their step-children (or in Marlo's case, her nephews) as their children, because other people treat their step-kids as less than/other/differently than if they think those children are their actual children.

 

6 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

If we’re talking about Eva, Marley and Michael, I have no idea where the idea came from that one can’t give gifts to a child that they did not adopt.  

You said we must adhere to proper use of language when referring to relationships...to foster effective communication.  It needs to be effectively communicated to Marley that she is NOT Michael's child and therefore is not deserving of any of the benefits she would otherwise receive if she were.

6 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

So if Tanya and Paul are married if they consider themselves married,

In many states, if they declare they are married, they can be considered married.  It's called "common law marriage." 

 

6 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

Why don’t we just dispense with all pretense and say, who is to define whether they have been cheated on?  If Porsha considers herself cheated on, but Dennis decided he didn’t cheat, because he subjectively doesn’t feel like he was cheating when he was sticking his hot dog in other women, then the logic proffered would dictate that both things could be true at once.

If we are demanding people refer to themselves as their legal and proper role so other people can know how to treat them, then yes, we can define whether Porsha and Tanya have been cheated on.  Since Porsha and Tanya are not married, legally Dennis and Paul did not cheat on them and they have no right to get upset.

It's a very silly argument.  None of these people need to properly define themselves to us. Who are we to demand Cynthia/Kandi/Kroy/Michael to stop calling their stepdaughters their "daughters?"

This conversation is over on my end.

 

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As to non married people calling themselves husband and wife!  From my experience....we didnt refer to ourselves as husband/wife in the beginning.  I took the Joy Behar route and called him my spousal equivalent. But!  People just can't handle it.  People outside of our relationship called us "husband/wife".  After awhile, you just stop correcting people and go with it.  Because they are going to call you husband/wife anyways--it is ingrained in the brain.

Howard Stern took the opposite route: he said people didn't give his girlfriend, Beth, the proper respect they would a legal wife because far too many people have seen celebrities with multiple girlfriends.  To me, to not legally marry just says to me, He/She is just not that into you.  And all these women like Porsha WANT to have a legal relationship which is why they are all having babies with their FIANCES. We all know they will be split up before the baby is a year old ... 

As for gay couples, a company in my city offered gay couples spousal benefits when it came to health insurance.  The day gay marriage was legalized, the letters went out to the couples that their benefits would end because they now had the legal options.  

In my family, my brother has six children with 2 wives, so the kids are legally half-siblings. They actually are very close and I have never heard them refer to each other as HALVES. 

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Who are we to demand Cynthia/Kandi/Kroy/Michael to stop calling their stepdaughters their "daughters?"

Kroy legally adopted Kim's daughters so he actually IS their father.  This issue became a TV controversy when Al Trautwig kept referring to gymnast Simone Biles' parents as her GRANDPARENTS because her grandparents legally adopted her. He got booted off the gymnastics commentary. (Terry Gannon now does it)

Edited by AuntieDiane6
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33 minutes ago, AuntieDiane6 said:

Howard Stern took the opposite route: he said people didn't give his girlfriend, Beth, the proper respect they would a legal wife because far too many people have seen celebrities with multiple girlfriends.  To me, to not legally marry just says to me, He/She is just not that into you.  

That may be, but I would like to point out that for, me, I was into him and vice versa.  We spent 20 years together, bought a house, no children, had pets--almost everything a married couple did/does. We just thought a wedding or getting married wasnt necessary. We were committed to each other without ceremony, license or ring. 

For me, committment is the important thing.  Marriage does not equal commitment.  Nor does being married mean that person is into you.  Take Kenya and Mark for example.....They're married and they have a kid.  What level of commitment was there when it ends after 2 years?  And did Mark ever show that he was into Kenya?  

 

 

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I am watching the reunion now, the sound is down and at first glance it looks like most of these women are in line to have a mammogram, the boobage is nuts and it really is not doing them any favors, it makes them heavier and sloppy and uncomfortable.

 

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Sooooo annoying! Moose mouth NeNe screeching through just about the entire first half. All the yelling and petty arguments made this pretty unwatchable. Don't think I'll be around for next time.

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(edited)

"You were in the sunken place and you wanted to pull other people down." Tanya nails Ken to a T. When Ken is miserable (all the time), she projects onto others and tries to pull them down with her. On top of being miserable, Ken is a hypocrite. 

Kandi says she doesn't want any part of Cookie Lady because she wasn't there, but has a lot to say about Porsha and Nene's reconciliation when she wasn't there. Okay girl.  

The Porsha/Tanya/Nene/Marlo vs Kandi/Cynthia/Ken/Eva divide is very clear. 

Edited by funnygirl
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Also also, am I the only one who wants Kandi to come out with a song titled "I'm Embedded In Your Brain, B*@#!", just to piss off Nene?

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11 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

I care, because it’s improper use of language, it’s that simple.  What they want to call each other behind closed doors is not of interest to me.  But if one wanders into the public square talking about one’s “daughter,” I find it helpful when they are talking about their daughter, not their son, not their niece, not their step-daughter, because it fosters effective communication... 

I’m also not convinced of the logical underpinning of the argument that essentially states that “if there were some people at some time who were denied the privilege of marriage, then it stands to reason that people who are not being denied the right to marry—Tanya and Paul—may be married if they say ‘husband’ and ‘wife’.”  I think that would be a tough pill especially for Paul to swallow, as it does not appear that he wants to be married to Tanya at this point in time.  But she becomes his wife if he placates her with the oldest trick in the book by calling her “wife” or “wifey”?  Wouldn’t that be an affront to his civil rights to suddenly make him married when he didn’t consent?

I wish I had the power to make the rules of earth, but, alas, all I have the power to do is learn them and then call balls and strikes.  

 

Language has long been used to subjugate, to oppress and to define others. While I understand that there are "rules", I also see that "rules" are merely something one group of people have agreed to. That doesn't make them sacrosanct or unable to be changed. I refer to my (step) son as my son, because I want everyone to be clear that in my mind the fact that I did not give birth to him does not mean that he is not as dear to me as a child I have borne. And while I can see how some might think it was disrespectful to his mother, I honor and show her respect by not trying to replace her, but to supplement the love that our small village gives him as he develops into an adult. 

I would argue that if the legal definition were the only way families were recognized, we would not have common law marriage, foster parents, adoption, or a myriad of other familial relationships that have been normalized over time. Common law marriage exists today because there used to be a host of financial acts that needed to be taken in order for a marriage to be consecrated. Poor people wanted to be married, but couldn't afford dowries, licenses and ceremonies. That is why the concept of marriage with no religious consecration existed. It dates back to early English law and was certainly part of this country since its founding, so all Paul and Tanya have to do is continue calling themselves married and acting as such and by operation of time, the law could recognize them as such eventually (obviously the specific requirements vary from state to state).  

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11 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

Kroy would absolutely refer to Ariana and Brielle as his daughters, as he adopted them, so it would be incredibly strange and incorrect for him to call them his stepdaughters.  

 

3 hours ago, drivethroo said:

This value placement is exactly why Cynthia, Michael, Kandi, Kroy and Marlo refer to their step-children (or in Marlo's case, her nephews) as their children

Alas, I guess we didn’t get very far on that one, huh?  At least we got to discuss something about which we feel passionately.  

So no empirical evidence about cheating? Well, dang.  I thought I was going to have to reverse myself and say I wouldn’t leave my husband if he were to cheat on me, as apparently the people who say they won’t leave are the only ones who do.  I don’t do well with change.  Dodged a bullet there. 😎 

What I think is so interesting is that Nene admitted Gregg was having an affair with the help, and it garnered, what, a minute of discussion?  Porsha got substantially more time devoted to Dennis and his cheating because Porsha resisted admission.  And Tanya—who is not even a full-time Housewife— got the vast bulk of attention paid to her vis a vis Cookie Lady.  What I learned from this?  It’s not about the crime, it’s about the coverup.  Damn, Nene played something right when everyone else fumbled??  I’m going to have to review everything I know about life!

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23 minutes ago, Rlb8031 said:

all Paul and Tanya have to do is continue calling themselves married and acting as such and by operation of time, the law could recognize them as such eventually (obviously the specific requirements vary from state to state).  

Yes, I see where you’re coming from.  That’s a good point.  In Georgia, they would have had to be together since 1997 for common law marriage to kick in.  I know they’ve been together forever, but certainly not 23 years?  But I see what you’re saying—that it could work in another state, and if that is how one gets to marriage in, say, Kansas, then it’s a path to a legally recognized marriage.  

I don’t think it’s about love.  As has been pointed out up thread, any combination of people (and not just people, people and their pets, and even nature) can form loving relationships.  That is not to be denied.  

By the way, I totally agree with you that rules can be changed and there are proper channels to change those rules.  What I don’t think someone gets to do is call a duck a horse, and if enough people call a duck a horse, it becomes a horse.  That was what I meant when I quoted President Lincoln as far as a dog not having five legs even if you call one leg a tail.  

And I totally understand why you or anyone would call a stepson “my son” if it works for your family.  Way back in my original post that I feel like I wrote 100 years ago, I said I care not how people refer to each other.  Sometimes I call my husband ‘Chuck’ when I do the singsong Lucy voice from The Peanuts.  I’m not saying people should swoop into my living room and demand that I call him by his proper name to adhere to their rules.  

My biggest point—my only point, really—was that I wasn’t thrilled with Andy conferring the wrong title on Mike’s daughters, absent evidence that he had been instructed to call these women “step-daughters.”  I think the one daughter who was hysterically crying during the season has been through enough with this tele-circus.  Andy doesn’t know them or socialize with them as far as we know, so why would he presume that Cynthia is defining her relationship with Mike’s daughters as “step”?  It just sounded ignorant, coming from him.  

Andy’s done this on other shows, too, specifically on a Real Housewives of Orange County reunion—he just bungled a discussion when he used the words “step” and “adopted” interchangeably, and it made some of the Housewives look foolish because they didn’t stop to break it down; they just answered.  And I really don’t think Andy would appreciate if someone referred to his son as his step-son, so it’s really just an argument about Andy being inappropriately casual with titles more than anything else. 

I think it’s an interesting discussion and interesting fodder for discussion to talk about blended families.  It’s something worth talking about.  Ever since season one of Married to Medicine, when we were meeting Jackie and Curtis, and Curtis had a teenaged daughter from a previous marriage, but Jackie loved her like a daughter, and Jackie and Curtis had a really uncomfortable talking head about whether the daughter was actually Jackie’s daughter, I realized I find it to be a topic fraught with intricacies and complications.  There are so many shades of grey and I realize my opinion isn’t the end-all.  I like to read all thoughtful responses on the topic.  

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I'm bored with all these women.  Andy needs to fire them all and get new people.

Nene:  If she's over the show, then be over the show and go.  The show is boring anyway, watching a bunch of grown women who think they are classy (I'm talking about Kenya there) act like rejects from Love and Hip Hop.

Kenya:  I can't stand this woman.  Here was a woman who won Miss USA.  She had a platform, she was a beauty queen.  I think she made some movie that went straight to video and I do think she had recurring roles on TV shows, but I forgot that she existed when she started on Housewives.  And if a white woman had made a comment about how long her hair was, to Kenya, people would say it was racist.  I think Kenya is colorist and texturist, how many times did she run her hand through her hair?  Maybe she was making sure it was still there?  BTW, Kenya does have nice hair, but it's not because of using any products, it's because of DNA, pure and simple.  But Kenya is no longer a beauty queen, she's just another reality show harpie, no different from Nene who she seems to think she's so much better than. 

Eva:  That's another waste.  She's so desperate for a peach that she's trying to be this tough chick.  And I still wonder what happened to the Eva Marcille Project, a show about her life that was on Oxygen.  And calling her daughter's father a "sperm donor?"  Really?  So did she just seek out some random dude to have a baby with?  I'm not saying the man wasn't abusive, but Eva should get some therapy to figure out why she was with a man like that.  She also needs to realize that even if Michael adopts Marley, one day she is going to want to know about her biological dad.  With things like Ancestry DNA and others around, you can't keep that stuff secret at all.

Kandi:  I feel for her because I really think she has a lot on her shoulders.  I was kind of shocked when she cursed at Nene, I thought Kandi has more class but I guess I was wrong.  One of these days Kandi is going to blow.  I sense that she's being pulled in so many directions, I remember the therapy session with she and Todd and I felt that Kandi is just exhausted and tired of it all, but she has to keep going with her businesses, with the show, because she's supporting so many other people.

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5 hours ago, funnygirl said:

Kandi says she doesn't want any part of Cookie Lady because she wasn't there, but has a lot to say about Porsha and Nene's reconciliation when she wasn't there. Okay girl.  

I'm definitely with Kandi on this one.  If I wasn't there, it wasn't about me, and you and I aren't really friends like that, then I don't give a fuck. 

I think the reason she has shit to say about the Porsha/Nene reconciliation is that Kandi has always been vocal about Nene's type of friendship, in that she's cool with you until she decides she's not and then she turns immediately to tearing you down but it's all your fault not hers.  Until she decides that she wants to be cool with you again.  So it's surprising to Kandi (and honestly to me) that Nene once again dogs out someone who was actually supposed to be her friend outside of the show and Porsha was willing to accept that fake ass apology and move forward.

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Nene isn’t capable of taking any criticism. Yes, Greg cheated because you starved him of affection and probably sex. More than likely, Nene got couple envy looking at other couples with sexy partners like Kim Z. Reluctantly she got back with Greg but isn’t physically attracted to him anymore. I see a home where the two of them coexist and are friends not lovers. I can kinda see why Greg would entertain the help. He is lonely in his marriage. I see a man that would rekindle his relationship with his wife but she is ice cold. Just my interpretation of their relationship. 

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(edited)
16 hours ago, Hiyo said:

Also, in case anyone is interested, here are the dresses and outfits worn at the reunion...

https://www.bigblondehair.com/real-housewives-of-atlanta-season-12-reunion-looks/

Most of those very expensive frocks looked like rumpled bed sheets on camera, out of all of them (I might be alone in thinking this) I liked Cynthia's and Tanya's the best, kudos to Tanya for being able to wear satin cut on the bias, not everyone has the figure for that.

Most reunion dresses look amazing standing up but once the ladies are seated they often become a nightmare, things shift and the fit changes into something not so flattering.

This reunion was a blur of boobs, white fabric and yelling...I did not get any information I did not already know or at least I think I did not get any new info, hard to tell.

Edited by Baltimore Betty
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(edited)

Truthfully, I was a bit shocked that Eva, of all people, had the only outfit that retailed for over $2,000 (form the ones that had the prices available, at any rate).

I do agree that Tanya had a nice dress, and so did Kenya as well, basic as it was.

But overall, the all-white season 7 reunion dresses were better than this reunion's.

Edited by Hiyo
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(edited)
On 5/17/2020 at 6:00 PM, LibertarianSlut said:

I actually thought it was mature of Cynthia to say that everyone talks about each other on the show.  For Porsha to pretend otherwise is kind of dishonest. 

I have a question for Tanya:  if there was nothing to hide about cookie lady, why reveal the wig?  That makes Tanya look as guilty and insecure as anything.  Since I’m basically positive my husband isn’t cheating on me with a cookie lady, if someone said that, I’d kind of let it just roll off my shoulders.  The longer they talk about cookie lady, and what Cynthia “knew,” the more it fuels the fire.  Something definitely went on with Paul that wasn’t above-board.  I feel like who facilitated bringing cookie lady onto set was irrelevant.  They all seem to be saying there is something there with the cookie lady.  Kandi was the only one making sense.  Why doesn’t Tanya just address cookie lady full on, instead of talking about filming?  I think I know why.  

I agree it was mature of Cynthia, but at the same time I think it was equal parts delusional! Not once, but twice, did Kenya hit below the belt making fun of Cynthia's wine knowledge therefore disparaging her new business on TV. No real friend would do that, so I understand the other ladies thinking Kenya/Cynthia's friendship is total BS (at least on Kenya's end) & true friendship is a two way street. I actually think Nene & Cynthia's friendship was much more genuine.

Whether the cookie lady accusation was real or not (probably was!), I can understand someone as harmless & inoffensive as Tanya wanting to exact a bit of revenge on Kenya since the attack came out of nowhere & for no reason (that I'm aware of!). I'm not a violent person at all (I safely carry flies & spiders outside in a tupperware container!) & I want to smack the $hit out of Kenya because she is such an awful creature. 😉 


 

Edited by IslandGirl
Writing is in the editing...
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(edited)

I haven’t read the posts yet, but I just saw the episode and LOVED IT. I am living for Kandi’s catchphrases whenever Nene gets her riled up.

Speaking of, that great big baby left the chat AGAIN. Her dumb ass needs to stay gone.

Porsha is no fun at all when she has her head lodged up Nene’s ass. So glad the show had her address everyone’s bestiality comments. 😆

Why was Tanya even there? How long do we think she rehearsed her “shade”? “She’s not corny; she’s Canadian!” 🤣

This episode just reinforced to me that Kenya had the best reunion look, her makeup was great.

Edited by link417
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12 hours ago, luckyroll3 said:

Because he is the help....?

giphy.gif

Yes because Nene wants some younger man. She treats him like ass and this is why he cheated on her. After he took her off the stripper pole and gave her a stable life, this is how that trash box treats him. KARMA biatch! 

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If Nene ever decides to get therapy/life coaching for real, the first issue thet should tackle is How to be Happy for Other People. Season after season, Nene's envy has devoured the show. I'm glad Kandi told Nene off because Nene has always been a primary hater since "Tardy for the Party." For someone who's always like "SupPORT me, bitch!" she always has to bring someone else down. Nene needs to leave the show. 

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8 hours ago, Vanderboom said:

If Nene ever decides to get therapy/life coaching for real, the first issue thet should tackle is How to be Happy for Other People. Season after season, Nene's envy has devoured the show. I'm glad Kandi told Nene off because Nene has always been a primary hater since "Tardy for the Party." For someone who's always like "SupPORT me, bitch!" she always has to bring someone else down. Nene needs to leave the show. 

Nene and her attitude need never to grace my TV screen ever again. And I hope I don’t run into personally (we live near each other, but in different neighborhoods- but we live within our means... ).
She squandered everything she has gained in life by being such a self-serving narcissist, by not being appreciative of others, by not appreciating the amazing, unique (and profitable) opportunities that she has had, and being a horrible, vile friend (or other in any relationship) she has had.

 

 

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On 5/19/2020 at 2:55 AM, GonnahearmeRoar said:

Nene isn’t capable of taking any criticism. Yes, Greg cheated because you starved him of affection and probably sex. More than likely, Nene got couple envy looking at other couples with sexy partners like Kim Z. Reluctantly she got back with Greg but isn’t physically attracted to him anymore. I see a home where the two of them coexist and are friends not lovers. I can kinda see why Greg would entertain the help. He is lonely in his marriage. I see a man that would rekindle his relationship with his wife but she is ice cold. Just my interpretation of their relationship. 

Greg probably cheated with the help, because it was the help who took care of him while he was sick. I remember Nene  just dropping him off when he had a surgery.  The help probably even took him to chemotherapy and sat with him while he was receiving it. The help probably made sure he was fed and took his medicine.

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(edited)
On 5/17/2020 at 10:10 PM, LibertarianSlut said:

It’s not about how they consider themselves though; it’s what their status is.  I feel the same way about Tanya and Paul calling each other “husband” and “wife.”  Those are specific legal statuses that they haven’t earned.  

Cynthia can love her fiancé’s daughters to the moon, and they will not be her step-daughters until she marries Mike.  Once she marries Mike, she can take a bullet for her step-daughters and they will still be “step” unless or until Cynthia adopts them (I don’t know if it’s legal to adopt an adult in Georgia, but it is legal to adopt one in Florida, or at least it was when I took the bar).  

These aren’t subjective definitions.  They have objective meanings.  “Step-daughter” vs “daughter” isn’t a measure of love, it’s a matter of a legal relationship.  I just don’t know why people like Andy would bungle these terms.  It makes me feel like we’re in Soviet Russia where everyone just called each other “comrade.”

I'm curious if you equally require siblings who share only one parent to refer to themselves as "half" siblings? 

Or, how about this? I was adopted by my parents at birth. A year and a half later, my biological parents had another daughter who was adopted by a different family. We are full biological siblings. However, legally, we are not, as we were not raised together as sisters in the same family with the same parents, and did not know about the other until we were in our 30s. Is she my sister?

On 5/18/2020 at 4:18 AM, LibertarianSlut said:

A lot of people confuse “adoption” with “step” for some reason, and if someone were to ask Andy how it is to finally have a stepson, I would say that person was confused, and I’d correct them.  That’s not my subjective preference; that’s someone saying something that is incorrect and counter factual.

Andy's son is neither adopted nor his step-son. He is his biological child, whom he did not adopt, as there was no reason to so. 

Edited by SimonSeymour
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26 minutes ago, SimonSeymour said:

I'm curious if you equally require siblings who share only one parent to refer to themselves as "half" siblings? 

It’s not a question of what I require; it’s a question of the amount of info that I think is relevant to disclose.  I get from the tone of your inquiry that you probably don’t agree with me and that’s totally ok; I respect all sincerely held opinions.  To answer your question, if someone was telling me their backstory and about their family, I would find it extremely helpful and informative if they were breaking down their family to me and explained that this person was their half-brother or sister.  After establishing it once, I wouldn’t see why they would need to repeat it.  

It is like knowing that Porsha and Lauren are half-sisters through their father, so I am not confused when Lauren doesn’t call Porsha’s mom “mom,” etc.. It’s not a value judgment; it’s a description.  If anyone doesn’t agree with me that this is important to understanding the narrative, I’m good with that.  

26 minutes ago, SimonSeymour said:

We are full biological siblings. However, legally, we are not, as we were not raised together as sisters in the same family with the same parents, and did not know about the other until we were in our 30s. Is she my sister?

I would say that, based on the info presented, it is a fact that you have a biological sister.  If her existence has no bearing on yours, I wouldn’t think it was something you needed to inform anyone about, unless you wanted to.  

27 minutes ago, SimonSeymour said:

Andy's son is neither adopted nor his step-son. He is his biological child, whom he did not adopt, as there was no reason to so. 

Yes, this is a restatement of my point.  Andy’s son is his son.  It would be a mischaracterization for someone to call him a stepson.  It is similarly a mischaracterization for Andy to ask Cynthia how she feels about having two new stepdaughters when she does not have stepdaughters, as she is not married to Mike.  Maybe they don’t want to be called her stepdaughters.  Maybe they don’t even like her.  I don’t think Andy should take liberties with familial relationships if he doesn’t want others taking liberties with his.  

Might this be a disagree to agree situation?  😃

To paraphrase Ramona from RHNYC, in all sincerity, I think we have beaten this topic to death.  It’s my position that there are correct and incorrect labels for things.  I generally think it’s more helpful than unhelpful to use the correct labels to facilitate understanding and communication.  To the extent that this is contrary to anyone else’s opinion, that is totally fine.  Nobody is changing anyone’s minds here, so I’m moving on.  Namaste to all.  I’m going to go watch a horror movie on Netflix.   🙏

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Eh, let people call their family members however they want to.

The only time semantics really matters is probably for legal and health reasons anyway.

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