Where Are They Now?

[Elizzikra]

Quote

 I can understand the urge to be a mother, but I don't understand Jamie putting herself through that over and over just so she can have biological offspring. They already had one kid, and there are SO MANY children out there already who need good homes. If they are so desperate for more kids, why spend all that time, money, and physical/emotional toll trying to force her body to carry a child? She, especially, knows how it feels to be a child who was abandoned by her parents. Why not adopt?

It takes a very special person to adopt a child from foster care, which is where the SO MANY children in need of good homes are. Those children have all, by definition, experienced trauma. They are great kids and they need loving parents and stable homes but they need so much more. There are a lot of people who are excellent parents to their biological children but they just aren't cut out to deal with the myriad challenges of parenting adopted children - from the very start taking a child in who may be removed from your care and returned home, to dealing with the fall out of a short life spent in foster care and experiencing abuse or neglect. The experiences are so different that I really think there is little use or benefit in comparing them. 

I also never understand why there is any pressure on people who are experiencing infertility to just give it up and adopt. No one ever says to a pregnant woman who had no trouble conceiving "why didn't you adopt a child in need of a home?" People who struggle to conceive don't have any greater of an obligation to children who need homes than people who are able to conceive easily, or for that matter, people who are childless by choice.

Quote

It kind of revealed that the underpinnings of the show are pretty much a sham and that none of the experts are actually bound to the usual ethical guidelines- they don't truly have to have their participants' best interests in mind as a counselor or social worker would, because they are acting as entertainers, not as their clinicians. That's why I think the show's 'experts' weren't pleased.

Yeah - the show can't have it both ways. Either the "experts" are clinicians who are present to provide some sort of clinical guidance/services to the couples, and thus are bound by ethical rules that prevent other relationships, or they are random people there to offer opinions with no expectation that they are any different from someone on the street offering an opinion. I didn't watch any season that involved Jessica but I have no respect for her as any sort of mental health professional. She crossed an ethical line and she won't even acknowledge it.

[configdotsys]

19 hours ago, sasha206 said:

When a man starts bringing up your sexual past to shame you for not fucking him, it's actually worse than whining.

Her worst crime to him before that scene was wanting to have some romance that builds into something.  He was all horned up for her immediately and it was a turnoff (see ball gag).   I'm surprised people seem to like him.  I get that she was a cold fish with zero personality, but his over zealousness turned her way off.

I did not see that season and my only exposure to those two people was what occured in that video clip. I would run as fast as I could from that guy. Acting like a 12 year old is just a complete and total turnoff to me. 

1 hour ago, sometimesjennifer said:

I am not sure if Shawneice CAN do better, but she sure deserves to be treated better than she is by Jephte. She is such a lovely, kind hearted, fun person. My heart breaks for her and all he has put her through. The comment I mentioned before, about how he is staying married to her because he wants all of his kids to have the same mother, leads me to believe that when they are done having kids he will probably leave her. They don't need a Hollywood romance, but there should be some level of mutual respect in the marriage. Even if they enjoy each other's company, on a deeper level he just sees her as someone he can tolerate long enough to stay with till he has gotten all the kids out of her that he wants. She deserves someone who appreciates her as a person, not just as the mother of his kids.

This is the problem I have: the "all he has put her through" part. Having to compromise on not having a shower caddy because your spouse will throw himself to the floor and throw a tantrum is something one can choose to put up with because it's easily fixed by returning the shower caddy and changing your husband's diaper, but being cheated on, publicly humiliated by hearing your husband is only with you because he wants kids, is a whole other thing entirely. No one should be in a marriage where they wake up every morning knowing that no matter what they do or how hard they try, their spouse will never truly love them because their spouse believes they deserve more that you. 

[OnTime]

30 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

 I can understand the urge to be a mother, but I don't understand Jamie putting herself through that over and over just so she can have biological offspring. They already had one kid, and there are SO MANY children out there already who need good homes. If they are so desperate for more kids, why spend all that time, money, and physical/emotional toll trying to force her body to carry a child? She, especially, knows how it feels to be a child who was abandoned by her parents. Why not adopt?

Jamie has said she wants four bio kids and then wants to adopt two more, for six total. I think it is one of her podcasts.

[psychoticstate]

I finally watched this today.  Matt has not changed one iota.  He's still the same insufferable douchebag he was during his season.  If this hadn't been filmed before the end of Season 10, I would assume that Matt didn't want to lose his King Fuckwit status to Zach because why else would you refuse to sign separation papers, at least?   I don't know the law in NC but it seems that Amber could get an attorney, get Matt served and if he doesn't respond, default his ass.  They have been unofficially separated long enough and their train wreck of a marriage is documented on film.  

Yeah, Matt.  Run off to your Instagram girl.  

Beth is still ridiculous.  She can't wait to explain what basic Caucasian sex is - - and keeps saying BCS constantly, like she's going to make it a thing but then feigns embarrassment when Jamie brings up how he managed to overcome all that BCS?  Just stop, Beth.  

And the most horrifying thing I've heard this week is that Beth and Jamie are considering having a baby.  Please no.  Just don't.

While I do think that Jamie and Doug make it work, I also think they work hard at showing us all how they make it work.   And Jamie, please quit shopping at the same store that Beth shops at.  I don't need to see the upper inner thigh of either one of you. 

Not sure about Shawniece and Jephte.

I think Anthony and Ashley and Bobby and Danielle are both very happy.  And certainly didn't see the need to demonstrate or remind us of it every second.  I think Bobby remains my fave MAFS husband but I had forgotten how cute Anthony was.  

I appreciated that Sam from Season 3 Atlanta regrets how she treated Neil, who remains awesome.  And they both are friendly and respect each other.  I also laughed over Neil doing an update with Tres, who he has apparently remained good friends with.  Telling that they are clearly not friends with scummy David.   I have had zero time for David ever since he dumped that sweet girl  -- was her name Tara?  I am drawing a blank.  

Anyhow, I appreciated Kevin Frazier and the checking in but too much Beth and Jamie.

[sometimesjennifer]

29 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

I also never understand why there is any pressure on people who are experiencing infertility to just give it up and adopt. No one ever says to a pregnant woman who had no trouble conceiving "why didn't you adopt a child in need of a home?" People who struggle to conceive don't have any greater of an obligation to children who need homes than people who are able to conceive easily, or for that matter, people who are childless by choice.

You're right - they are very different things. I personally don't understand someone like Jamie who is so very desperate to procreate that she puts herself through multiple miscarriages and pain, especially when she already has a child. That level of suffering and punishment to her mind and body doesn't seem worth it to me. The maternal instinct makes sense to me - the desire to mother and nurture is within a lot of people. In her specific case, it would make more sense to me to stop torturing herself and maybe look into other options to fill that need. Adoption certainly isn't for everyone, and I am sorry if I sounded flippant about it or that I think everyone should adopt rather than procreate. I may not personally have the desire to parent, but I do understand the drive people have to do so. I do believe there are a lot of wonderful people who are actively creating/raising amazing humans in this world, but there are also a lot of selfish people who just want a mini me to dress up and show off but have no interest in actually being good parents. Those are the people who upset me the most. I don't know that Jamie is that kind of person, but it did rankle me a bit that she put the pressure on her daughter to save her marriage. That kind of motive for procreation is really gross to me.

[princelina]

13 hours ago, Meowwww said:

When I see Jamie, all I can see is the horrible lap dance she attempted on Ben on The Bachelor. 

I was thinking about her with regard to Taylor being an instagram fame whore; different people like Luke and possibly Brandon recognizing their bride from somewhere before the wedding, etc. - they started this whole show/premise with a girl who had appeared on both the Bachelor AND Bachelor Pad!  At the time I was thinking, "Are they serious that we should take this seriously?"  (I will admit to an UO that I like Jamie now - she's happy doing her little interviews and seems like a nice person; I've always liked Doug too so they don't really bother me at all.  They seem to enjoy each other and living their lives and taking advantage of MAFS opportunities, which is not a bad or evil way to be.)

[OnTime]

59 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

Beth is still ridiculous.  She can't wait to explain what basic Caucasian sex is - - and keeps saying BCS constantly, like she's going to make it a thing but then feigns embarrassment when Jamie brings up how he managed to overcome all that BCS?  Just stop, Beth.  

Well, she certainly isn't stopping.  You can buy a mug here for $22.

https://shop.bethandjamie.com/products/basic-caucasian-sex-mug

Shirts, hats and water bottles could be next....

 

Edited May 1, 2020 by OnTime

[Elizzikra]

Quote

it did rankle me a bit that she put the pressure on her daughter to save her marriage. That kind of motive for procreation is really gross to me.

I hate that too and I'm shocked that people still have the belief that having a child will "save" a marriage. It never works and even if it did, it's one of the worst possible reasons to have a baby.

[becauseIsaidso]

On 4/30/2020 at 10:55 AM, Booger666 said:

i thought Ashley and Anthony looked great and am glad they are so happy.  Their little girl is adorable.

I’m shocked that Jaime and Elizabeth are together.  I remember them having some very nasty fights.  It’s amazing they’ve gotten past that and are happy now.

I wish Jephte and Shawniece would be done already.  They don’t show much, if any, affection or kindness to each other.  Life is short and they should be with someone who appreciates and likes them, not someone who does the bare minimum to keep it together for the kids.

I was pleased to see Jaime and Elizabeth together - they both run hot and cold and have the same over-the-top style of dealing with conflict, from which may well come understanding ....Having found the one who very well matches their own emotional makeup, each is likely in the place and with the person for which they are best suited, and, no one else with have to figure out how to deal with these particular roller coasters.

Besides, for some strange reason, I kinda like them.

[Ohwell]

I don't need to see Jamie and Elizabeth anymore.  Every time I see them I feel like taking a shower.   So yeah, I guess they belong together.

[humbleopinion]

The continued wedded state of Nostrils and BigRed is to be.... celebrated?

If they can be horrible to each other, leaving than the rest of humanity alone... then the experts did a good job?

Those 2 deplorables revealed ONE the recipes for MAFS success...find 2 equally awful people, throw them a teevee wedding and let them sink or swim in the deep end....

Mazel tov to the Thompson-Bices

[DocTerv]

Matt looks like he's homeless with his greasy hair and the knees out of his jean sweatpants. He appears to badly need a shower.  Thanks to our NC legal folk, I'm now of the opinion that Amber and he are milking this divorce thing for just a little extra camera time.  They are both abhorrent. 

It's interesting how different some of these couples are on Couples Couch (which was far more entertaining than the actual show this go-round) so my observations are based on that rather than the reunion. 

Danielle looks way prettier just hanging around her house with Bobby than she did when she was "professionally made up. 

On CC,Shawniece and Jephte seem cute and comfortable together and appeared to regard each other with a lot of affection. I've been married 40 years and it's been my observation that the white hot "falling in love" phase over time becomes a much stronger bond based on absolute trust, humor,and shared experience, . They seem headed in that direction. The reunion seemed to stir up some old stuff between them. 

Jamie and Beth surprised the heck out of me. I thought they'd have killed each other by now but they seemed relaxed and happy together. Beth wasn't nearly as obnoxious as usual on CC. Shocked. I was shocked I tell you!

Sam realized she was an asshat to Neil and she owned her faults and seems to have changed a lot since they are friends now. I shall forgive her a little for being so mean to darling Neil. 

Edited May 1, 2020 by DocTerv
Because who is not how unless you're dyslexic.

[Kiss my mutt]

I got divorced in NC and there is a one year separation period before you can file. It’s archaic and ridiculous 

I wonder if Jamie is feeling negatively about her abortions and that feed into her no hold barred, do whatever, need to procreate. I know way too much about this chick’s reproductive history. 

[DrewPaul2010]

19 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Yes.  I think by that point Jon felt like he was being strung along and wanted her to just be honest and open about it, not continue to let him go on with false hopes.  To be fair it was after a month had passed with no change at all.  Now I don't remember if he was putting subtle pressure on her all the way through which turned her off, but this is a unique situation where there is all kinds of pressure on a person to find the other one attractive, not just pressure coming from the other person.  After all, you married them so you want to wait to see if it ever happens before throwing in the towel, but then you feel so much pressure that you may end up never feeling it just by virtue of the weight of your own expectation to do so, and you want to be sure you're really feeling it and not just doing it because it would make for a happy ending.  Those feelings have to have a non-pressurized situation in which to develop, which this is not just by virtue of the couple having gotten married before those feelings may have developed.  Molly could have been sincere about how she felt about that but Jon was tired of waiting so he had lost his patience and his belief in her.  I can understand that, but yeah, he didn't look good in that video.  It's like the more time went on the more his ego was bruised that she wasn't falling for him, and the more he acted snippy with her.  I remember when I first saw this exchange I thought she looked worse than him, but now I'm not seeing her as badly and him worse.

I faulted Jon for not moving out after about 3 weeks into it because it was painfully obvious she wasn't going to even pretend to be a wife, a friend or a soulmate. She expected someone to be handsome and charming by her standards and he didn't.

The worse matched couple ever had to be Heather and Derek of season 4. The scene where they attempted to reconcile with Pastor couldn't have illustrated the differences between them more clearly. She's dressed in a nice pants and blouse outfit with large owl glasses. Derek comes in wearing a tank top shirt and a baseball cap on backwards. Either he took his own idiotic advice to wear such clothes or listened to equally idiotic friends. Its obvious he's a knock about guy a beer drinker, pot smoker. The very first morning she realized he was a slob. She said he'd be a one date guy. So how could they get it so wrong?

 

 

[Yeah No]

12 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

It was definitely inappropriate behavior but I'm just saying it's not technically "unethical" in an official sense because she wasn't actually their counselor. Do I think it was totally okay behavior as a *human being* or as someone who purports to be a counselor on TV, no. But I think it embarrassed the show because it revealed that, actually, these people aren't acting as their counselors at all, in any capacity, no matter how much they try to set that dynamic up on TV. People complained to the requisite psychological board/medical board (sorry, not sure) after they got together, but there was no complaint to be made...because they're not actually their therapists. They're there for entertainment. It's basically like he got together with a friend who was his confidante & advice-giver during a protracted breakup and who had a little crush on him, not like getting together with his actual doctor/therapist. Still weird, but not the same power dynamic.

It kind of revealed that the underpinnings of the show are pretty much a sham and that none of the experts are actually bound to the usual ethical guidelines- they don't truly have to have their participants' best interests in mind as a counselor or social worker would, because they are acting as entertainers, not as their clinicians. That's why I think the show's 'experts' weren't pleased. When we see the experts telling participants to keep trying on marriages that are clearly beyond dead, it's for the show, not for their best interests.

So yeah, I guess, is it moral? Probably not totally, but imo definitely not worse than telling people who are being cheated on, lied to, screamed at, told they're ugly every day, etc., to "stick it out" as all the experts so often do to keep the show going. 

I'm going to agree with you but go one further to say that even though the "experts" are not technically acting as their therapists they don't make that clear to the audience and so are "giving the appearance" of being their actual therapists.  And that, yes, is widely considered to be unethical behavior by people in the therapeutic community.  You don't get to portray an image of acting in your professional capacity and then just because you're not technically functioning as a therapist on the show in the fine print somewhere get to claim you've done nothing unethical.  The show clearly wants to capitalize on these people's titles to make itself look legitimate and serious.  And being deceptive and giving the appearance of acting as a therapist without making any public disclaimer on the show to clarify that they are not is considered by many in the therapeutic community to be unethical behavior for anyone with their professional credentials.

[Meowwww]

Matt looked like an old man.  Grey and skinny and ugly in form and personality.  He aged 30 years.  
Beth and Jamie are perfect for each other, they are just alike in personality.  Not saying anything positive here, other than she has nice facial skin. 
Molly redeemed herself. I think Jon and Dr Jessica had something from the start. 

[Liberty]

4 hours ago, Yeah No said:

the "experts" are not technically acting as their therapists they don't make that clear to the audience and so are "giving the appearance" of being their actual therapists.  

A couple of odd things came to mind while reading the post.

It is difficult to grasp the difference between "reality" and "reality TV".  MAFS is "reality TV", and what production and direction present to us, is not necessarily "reality".  

 

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, Liberty said:

A couple of odd things came to mind while reading the post.

It is difficult to grasp the difference between "reality" and "reality TV".  MAFS is "reality TV", and what production and direction present to us, is not necessarily "reality".  

 

Yup, exactly!  At least on fictional shows we know that the doctors aren't really doctors and even if somehow they were they're reading from a script, they're not necessarily functioning as they would in real life.

[Valegro]

On 4/30/2020 at 12:46 PM, OnTime said:

I really don't get that because they are training to run a marathon!  Guess I thought they would be in better shape.

Having run a few half marathons and in training for a full marathon, the runger is STRONG. All that exercise makes you feel like you're starving because your body thinks you suddenly need a ton of calories for all that work. Many people actually gain weight during training due to that unless you track your calories. You also have to fuel during the runs so you might take in 100 calories every few miles which negates a lot of the calories burned. Add in genetics and it can be a struggle. Marathon training isn't recommended for weight loss generally.

[ReadMeLattice]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I'm going to agree with you but go one further to say that even though the "experts" are not technically acting as their therapists they don't make that clear to the audience and so are "giving the appearance" of being their actual therapists.  And that, yes, is widely considered to be unethical behavior by people in the therapeutic community.  You don't get to portray an image of acting in your professional capacity and then just because you're not technically functioning as a therapist on the show in the fine print somewhere get to claim you've done nothing unethical.  The show clearly wants to capitalize on these people's titles to make itself look legitimate and serious.  And being deceptive and giving the appearance of acting as a therapist without making any public disclaimer on the show to clarify that they are not is considered by many in the therapeutic community to be unethical behavior for anyone with their professional credentials.

I definitely agree with that. I’m just saying that applies to all of them, not just Jessica, so I found the faux concern about “ethics” that the show tried to portray on the special a bit hypocritical. I don’t think they were upset with her because she went against ethical guidelines, I think the other experts weren’t pleased because it exposed the fact that they are all masquerading as these folks’ clinicians when they are not in any way filling that role. The others might not have dated any former participants but anyone who tells Brandon and Taylor, Meka and Michael, or Katie and Derek to stay together! and work things out! and try to save their marriage! is not acting ethically either. 

Edited May 2, 2020 by Lm2162

[HZAnita]

Matt is ridiculous.  Why not sign the damn papers?  Is he afraid she's going to steal the laundry bag of possessions he lugs around when he couch surfs?

And, sorry, but Amber came across as still soooooooooo bitter (understandably so).  I did not believe her "I met the sweetest, kindest, most wonderful man ever" spiel.  At all.  It seemed like she was trying to bait Matt, but he barely acknowledges her existence enough to be bothered. 

I will be out on the shaky limb that likes the current incarnation of Jamie and Beth.  They seem to have really calmed down and become more positive after the cameras.  Plus, they are both off the market now, which is better for the rest of the nation. 

I have always thought that Shawniece was really pretty.  It used to amaze me that she could look like 10 different people during one episode depending on hair, makeup, and glasses!  I also enjoy them on Couples Couch.  I see that they act like friends, but I don't think that is a bad foundation for a marriage.

Sam really seems to have matured.  I felt sort of sad when she admitted that the experts had picked the perfect man for her but she was not in a place to see that until it was too late.   I am glad she seems happy now.

Neil!!!!!! 🥰  Tres!!!! 🤢

 

[StatisticalOutlier]

3 minutes ago, HZAnita said:

Matt is ridiculous.  Why not sign the damn papers? 

Because if she wants a divorce that bad, she can file it on her own, without any participation from him.  No histrionics necessary.

And it's still not clear exactly what paper it is she says she needs his signature on.  I wouldn't sign it either, and I'm nowhere near as big of a jerk as he is.  You want a divorce?  Get one and leave me alone.

[DrewPaul2010]

I wonder if anyone of the people who have been on this show would be willing to marry a stranger a second time?

They ever plan to have an obese couple?

Or couples with physical challenges?

Couples of different races?

 

 

[Yeah No]

13 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

I definitely agree with that. I’m just saying that applies to all of them, not just Jessica, so I found the faux concern about “ethics” that the show tried to portray on the special a bit hypocritical. I don’t think they were upset with her because she went against ethical guidelines, I think the other experts weren’t pleased because it exposed the fact that they are all masquerading as these folks’ clinicians when they are not in any way filling that role. The others might not have dated any former participants but anyone who tells Brandon and Taylor, Meka and Michael, or Katie and Derek to stay together! and work things out! and try to save their marriage! is not acting ethically either. 

I think these people are the opposite of those actors that say on commercials "I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV".  They should say, "I AM a doctor but I DON'T play one on TV (despite the way it looks)", LOL.

[HZAnita]

10 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Because if she wants a divorce that bad, she can file it on her own, without any participation from him.  No histrionics necessary.

And it's still not clear exactly what paper it is she says she needs his signature on.  I wouldn't sign it either, and I'm nowhere near as big of a jerk as he is.  You want a divorce?  Get one and leave me alone.

Really?  Well, then I am not sure what was happening on the show! lol Why was she being so adamant that she can't "move on" if she could just finish off this whole crapfest herself....?  As far as him signing, I still don't get why he wouldn't sign the papers (on or off camera).  Their whole situation is bizarre and gets more bizarre the more I read.

[Gigi43]

10 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I wonder if anyone of the people who have been on this show would be willing to marry a stranger a second time?

They ever plan to have an obese couple?

Or couples with physical challenges?

Couples of different races?

 

 

 

Sean and Davina in the dumpster fire that was season 2 were different races (he was white and I believe she was Indian ), but that season seems to have been erased from the shows history.

 

As for physical challenges... personally I'm okay they haven't and I have them. Either they're going to match two people with challenges/disabilities with that being the one thing they have in common, they've done it with races, and that's not how relationships are built. Or they're going to match someone with physical challenges with someone who ends up not being cut out for it and that shouldn't be sprung upon a person. You can be someone who isn't cut out to be in a relationship with us and still be a good person but I foresee that person being flamed online when the producers are to blame. I can watch sports with the best of 'em but I'm not ever going to be able go hiking with a guy and if a guy wants someone who can do that or generally be  very active with, that's fine with me, you aren't obligated to date me just don't be a dick about how you state it. There's no chance this show will be respectful with it.

Edited May 3, 2020 by Gigi43

[humbleopinion]

12 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I wonder if anyone of the people who have been on this show would be willing to marry a stranger a second time?

JamieO would love to marry a different stranger and be on camera for another whole other season...

Doug...who?... would be forgotten in a heart beat...

[ReadMeLattice]

9 hours ago, Gigi43 said:

 

Sean and Davina in the dumpster fire that was season 2 were different races (he was white and I believe she was Indian ), but that season seems to have been erased from the shows history.

 

As for physical challenges... personally I'm okay they haven't and I have them. Either they're going to match two people with challenges/disabilities with that being the one thing they have in common, they've done it with races, and that's not how relationships are built. Or they're going to match someone with physical challenges with someone who ends up not being cut out for it and that shouldn't be sprung upon a person. You can be someone who isn't cut out to be in a relationship with us and still be a good person but I foresee that person being flamed online when the producers are to blame. I can watch sports with the best of 'em but I'm not ever going to be able go hiking with a guy and if a guy wants someone who can do that or generally be  very active with, that's fine with me, you aren't obligated to date me just don't be a dick about how you state it. There's no chance this show will be respectful with it.

I’m more concerned about the disabled people they’d choose for the show and how they’d likely be spoken to... or people in interracial relationships, etc. this show doesn’t deal with anyone or anything respectfully or with any class (remember how constant the virginity talk was?), so I can’t imagine they’d choose partners who would afford anyone the dignity they deserved. They’d go for drama and sensationalism instead. Not fair for any disabled participants who would be reduced to a stereotype. 

[Gigi43]

1 hour ago, Lm2162 said:

I’m more concerned about the disabled people they’d choose for the show and how they’d likely be spoken to... or people in interracial relationships, etc. this show doesn’t deal with anyone or anything respectfully or with any class (remember how constant the virginity talk was?), so I can’t imagine they’d choose partners who would afford anyone the dignity they deserved. They’d go for drama and sensationalism instead. Not fair for any disabled participants who would be reduced to a stereotype. 

 

It's not okay for reality shows to reduce people to stereotypes but that's pretty much the nature of reality shows, as this show has proved over and over again. Able bodied people trade their dignity for 15minutes, a physically disabled person is perfectly capable of making the same decision. I don't think the show should go out of their way to find anyone disabled as my original post said. It's pointless because this show isn't actually trying to accomplish anything with society. However if I for example lost my mind and applied I  don't think my disability should make me less qualified than any of the other idiots. I know what I'd be getting into and anyone who doesn't have an intellectual disability has the same ability. 

Edited May 4, 2020 by Gigi43

[ReadMeLattice]

10 hours ago, Gigi43 said:

 

It's not okay for reality shows to reduce people to stereotypes but that's pretty much the nature of reality shows, as this show has proved over and over again. Able bodied people trade their dignity for 15minutes, a physically disabled person is perfectly capable of making the same decision. I don't think the show should go out of their way to find anyone disabled as my original post said. It's pointless because this show isn't actually trying to accomplish anything with society. However if I for example lost my mind and applied I  don't think my disability should make me less qualified than any of the other idiots. I know what I'd be getting into and anyone who doesn't have an intellectual disability has the same ability. 

I’m saying this as a disabled person married to another disabled person, to clarify. I just wouldn’t find it very fun to see all the bigoted things they’d likely say *as an audience member*. Enough of that in the real world. 

they tried to go the “let’s discuss real issues in people’s lives!” route with bride and prejudice and it is a TRAIN WRECK, lol. (I never knew, like, anti-Semitism could be made into a reality TV episode hosted by Pastor Cal, but I was wrong!) Although I guess they know what they’re doing because it’s hard to look away from a wreck. 

Edited May 4, 2020 by Lm2162

[Booger666]

It’s interesting that people say it’s very easy to get a divorce in NC.  On the Teen Mom forum there was a lot of speculation that Janelle, who lives in NC, went to TN because she wanted a divorce and NC laws made it more difficult than TN.  I wonder if Amber can get a divorce without his signature, but maybe it takes longer.  Regardless, they are done and Matt is an ass for not signing the papers.

[Peper81]

I don't fault Matt for not being willing to sign these papers on the tv show.  There is no way in hell I'd sign anything foisted on me like that, period.  That said, he should've signed the papers back when she sent them to him.  I can only assume that Matt can't afford an attorney so he's just avoiding the whole thing.  I, personally, wouldn't want to risk any kind of liability from staying married to someone I didn't like, didn't trust and wanted nothing to do with.  She needs to file some papers and just go about doing what she can do without his signature.  Surely she should be able to default him once he gets served whether by personal service or by publication.  I'd want that clock ticking as soon as possible.  

[Kira53]

10 hours ago, Peper81 said:

I don't fault Matt for not being willing to sign these papers on the tv show.  There is no way in hell I'd sign anything foisted on me like that, period.  That said, he should've signed the papers back when she sent them to him.  I can only assume that Matt can't afford an attorney so he's just avoiding the whole thing.  I, personally, wouldn't want to risk any kind of liability from staying married to someone I didn't like, didn't trust and wanted nothing to do with.  She needs to file some papers and just go about doing what she can do without his signature.  Surely she should be able to default him once he gets served whether by personal service or by publication.  I'd want that clock ticking as soon as possible.  

I thought someone wrote that the show would pay for the divorce if people chose to divorce. The same as they paid for the marriage ceremony. Can anyone confirm this?

[OnTime]

This is a couple of years old....

https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/how-much-are-the-couples-on-married-at-first-sight-paid-for-being-on-the-show.html/

As fans know, not every couple on Married at First Sight gets a happy ending. Through season 6, only 22% of couples on the show have stayed together. Who foots the bill for the divorce attorney if things go up in smoke? Apparently, the producers will step in and cover some of those costs.

“There is not any money specifically built in for divorce costs, no,” Coelen told The Wrap. “We will contribute within a certain period of time if they get divorced. We will help them cover the costs of an attorney if they choose to do that. I don’t know what the amount is. It’s nominal.

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 5/4/2020 at 5:50 AM, Booger666 said:

I wonder if Amber can get a divorce without his signature, but maybe it takes longer.

I posted a link to the law upthread.  There's no fast-track if some document is signed by the non-filing party. 

 

Quote

 Regardless, they are done and Matt is an ass for not signing the papers.

No, Amber is an ass for insisting that he sign papers when she can file for divorce without any involvement from him. 

Which brings up the question:  What are these fucking papers she's flashing around, if the law says she can get a divorce without any participation from him???

[Retired at last]

Maybe she was trying to get him to sign some kind of release so she could spill her guts and he couldn't sue? That would have been interesting if he did sign that, due to Kevin Frazier's urging and then found out it wasn't a divorce doc.

[psychoticstate]

On 5/2/2020 at 10:12 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

Because if she wants a divorce that bad, she can file it on her own, without any participation from him.  No histrionics necessary.

And it's still not clear exactly what paper it is she says she needs his signature on.  I wouldn't sign it either, and I'm nowhere near as big of a jerk as he is.  You want a divorce?  Get one and leave me alone.

Sure, if Matt didn't want the divorce.  He did.  He checked out before Amber did so there is no reason for him not to at least sign the separation papers -- other than he's simply a Class A Fuckwit who keeps rising to the challenge to out-fuckwit himself.  

[StatisticalOutlier]

29 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

Sure, if Matt didn't want the divorce.  He did.  He checked out before Amber did so there is no reason for him not to at least sign the separation papers -- other than he's simply a Class A Fuckwit who keeps rising to the challenge to out-fuckwit himself.  

There are no separation papers.  "A separation agreement or other written document is not required to be legally separated in North Carolina. To be considered separated from your spouse, you need to be living in different homes, and at least one of you needs to intend that the separation be permanent." 

I think they've got that covered.

[RealHousewife]

What poor IG model is Matt kicking it with? lol I hope Amber really has found a sweet guy. I don't wish Matt on any nice girl. 

[Elizzikra]

32 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

What poor IG model is Matt kicking it with? lol I hope Amber really has found a sweet guy. I don't wish Matt on any nice girl. 

Maybe she's an "IG model" the way he's a "pro basketball player."

[RealHousewife]

Just now, Elizzikra said:

Maybe she's an "IG model" the way he's a "pro basketball player."

LOL! I thought the same. It's kind of disgusting how gorgeous some of those Instagram models are, but I'm sure there are many who are broke down too...

[Liberty]

6 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

 .... I hope Amber really has found a sweet guy. .... 

I wish the best for Amber.

Do you think she hurt her chances of meeting a sweet guy by being on this show?

Edited May 7, 2020 by Liberty

[gonecrackers]

Katie is doing Cameo.   A big wow on the lack of self awareness there.

Mindy is also on Cameo but is donating her proceeds. Oh, & also she's a decent person.

[Elizzikra]

5 hours ago, Liberty said:

I wish the best for Amber.

Do you think she hurt her chances of meeting a sweet guy by being on this show?

I don't think a lot of men watch the show - it's not really their target demographic. I'm sure she will tell people she was on it and hopefully they won't watch much, if any of it. If someone watches her season, they might think badly of her in some spots but it's also pretty clear that Matt treated her very badly. So it's a toss up. Depends on the guy I suppose.

[humbleopinion]

On 5/1/2020 at 11:12 AM, OnTime said:

Well, she certainly isn't stopping.  You can buy a mug here for $22.

https://shop.bethandjamie.com/products/basic-caucasian-sex-mug

Shirts, hats and water bottles could be next....

 

Candles that smell like her va jayjay like Gwenyth's scented candles.....pass me a barf bag..

[RealHousewife]

8 hours ago, Liberty said:

I wish the best for Amber.

Do you think she hurt her chances of meeting a sweet guy by being on this show?

I agree with the comment that men aren't as into this show. I'd think Matt would be the one who has to worry more about the show's effect on his love life since he came across so coldhearted and there are more female viewers. 

Amber seems to have a good heart. I really hope this show doesn't hurt her. 

[topanga]

2 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I agree with the comment that men aren't as into this show. I'd think Matt would be the one who has to worry more about the show's effect on his love life since he came across so coldhearted and there are more female viewers. 

Amber seems to have a good heart. I really hope this show doesn't hurt her. 

Unfortunately, men like Matt will get women no matter how cruel, selfish, dumb, directionless, or lazy he is. Some women are drawn to that type of man. 

[ReadMeLattice]

I don't get what's really going on with the divorce/separation papers, and yeah, I wouldn't sign something on a TV show, but Matt also didn't appear to disagree with Amber's claim that she'd sent *something* three times thus far that he'd refused to sign. He doesn't seem to have any issue with defending himself, so I'm inclined to believe that some aspect of the story is true, no matter how they've trussed it up/scripted it to make it make sense on the show.

I know that in my state, when I got divorced after my first marriage, there were several rounds of agreements to sign. It was an amicable divorce, no assets, no kids, no court. We still had to sign an initial agreement before anything could be filed, and then those papers had to be returned six months later, and then we had to sign those, and *then* one of us had to go in and hand in the papers physically at the courthouse. And we lived in a state where it was far easier to get a divorce than in NC. There was still definitely initial paperwork of some kind that we both had to sign in order to get started. She might not be calling it the right thing, but I just remember there being several rounds of paperwork requiring both signatures, even though we were definitely already separated and in agreement that we would get a divorce.

I'm no lawyer, but I do believe her that it's likely that there's some initial paperwork step he refuses to take as some kind of revenge or just to be snotty. If it wasn't true at all, I highly doubt he'd be willing to go along with that story, even if producer-concocted.

I agree with Amber that it's some kind of power play. He told media outlets after they got married that he was disappointed to see her walking down the aisle, that he wasn't that attracted to her, etc., etc. He complained about her being too affectionate, for god's sake. However Amber might act now, she really didn't do much wrong to him during their marriage besides being needy, so I think that speaks to his overall character--no reason to tell that to outlets unless you want to get a dig in. I think he literally resents her for not being the kind of "hot" he wanted, and he feels cheated by the experience and somehow blames that on her. I also think he likely resents her because everyone on social media absolutely hates him, and he probably sees himself as a victim of them/her/the show. 

Edited May 7, 2020 by Lm2162

[Ohwell]

I don't "hate" Matt, I just think he should never have been chosen as a mate.  I do agree that he's angry that he wasn't paired with someone he thought was attractive. 

[ReadMeLattice]

Just now, Ohwell said:

I don't "hate" Matt, I just think he should never have been chosen as a mate.  I do agree that he's angry that he wasn't paired with someone he thought was attractive. 

I don't mean everyone here, I just mean he's likely gotten a ton of angry messages on social media and probably directs some of his resentment at those critics at Amber. 

And yeah, he literally seems angry that he wasn't attracted to her.