S09.E15: Finale Reunion

[qtpye]

50 minutes ago, Lindz said:

Iris... I am HERE..FOR..IT!! 😂 I agree with some of what she said & her reactions were justified. What qualities did the experts get right? "We serve the youth." WTF?! He sees her crying & doesn't attempt to comfort her AT ALL & when asked what he thinks about it, says she's "compassionate & caring & he appreciates that." WTF?!! Those aren't answering the questions!! WTF is WRONG with him?!! Her response didn't make sense either. You're crying cuz you care about him? Nah. You're crying cuz you're DEVASTATED!! It HURTS!! When he was more forthcoming, they actually started to get somewhere in understanding. She's right, you can't fix what you don't know & he didn't care & didn't want to try. He tried the bs "they're not negative traits" & she called it & said they were negative enough for him not to want to stay married. Establish her foundation of intimacy & NOT sex?? YEAH. RIGHT. It gets difficult to keep the bs straight! The COUPLE builds their own intimacy. The BETTER question is how did we NOT have that intimacy? & to his "you did your best" response, I'd ask, "HOW did you??" HOW did try at this marriage?? & They still talk & go out, but never had those deep conversations addressing what happened??! WHY are they doing that?? It must her trying to stay friends. Her attitude probably shifted when she watched the show. She has a right be upset, he screwed the marriage by not telling her what he was thinking & feeling. DON'T HOLD BACK! Who tf cares?! BE REAL! BE OPEN & HONEST! Yeah. She's owning her status. It is what it is. Keep it moving. Unfortunately, she just focuses on what he did wrong & didn't acknowledge her own faults & behavior (that we saw) & that won't help her grow.

It’s one of the reasons I thought he was never that into her. I think he was done after the lemonade and the condoms. At least he was not running around with half of Charlotte during the marriage like Matt.

It kind of embarrasses me that Matt was like “Nope” in 15 minutes of meeting Amber and she was babbling about naming their future son Mathew Douchebag Asshole the Fourth on the second day of marriage.

[LittleTexas]

You are all So on the mark about women being jealous of each other; I can tell you that gets Worse with age!  I am "older", and have friends who are jealous of young women we see, when we are out for a drink. My feeling is: "hey, I was There, I did That, it's their turn", and I am the Best "older woman" I can be.  As for Keith not wanting to deflower a virgin, I have 3 brothers, and I think they would have felt the same way.  In the long run, it was Emotional immaturity, with the virginity not really the prime focal point, when it came to Iris.  If she can have oral sex, then I guess she Can "warm up", so don't act all curly lip, when he tries to show some affection.  Too many mixed signals and stop signs, poor Keith.

At the end, I think he had Explained himself, ad nauseum, and she wasn't listening, so he stopped Trying. One can beat a dead horse only So long.  It seemed like she was more interested in JUST how long he was going to wait, and never considered his feelings, very often.

I think Greg and Deonna can make it, as she Was changing, at a reasonable rate, and appreciates Greg. Just needs to let him Know what, more often. Just because You don't like compliments, it doesn't mean your SO might not love them. 

The other two...I can't even. If they are still married today, I would be so shocked!

[Lindz]

Cordial?? Amber. FVCK THAT GUY!! She's still being needy & tryna make demands from that worthless POS!! ISSA WRAP! All that, "you hate me" mess. Girl. STOP! It ain't personal. He doesn't have to fake anymore. She's seeing the real him. She didn't get treated how she wanted in the marriage, she fordamnsure won't get treated how she wants in the divorce! He screwed her over, why try to be nice? Why would she want to say a word to him?? It's BIZARRE! She's sending the message that what he did was okay. Like a desperate puppy. Grow a backbone! How to play it is act like he's nothing & it's DONE! ERASE him from memory! He read from his old script saying, "I care about Amber." HOW did you show you cared? CUT THE BS!! WHY DID YOU DO THIS?? They NEVER get to REAL stuff! 😒 Hell. Call him out on the disrespect statement about Jamie. That's an easy one! He asked, "what boundaries?" Just. WOW. He was so checked out @ the end of the episode. He looked so stupid, ignoring everyone. 😂

Edited September 21, 2019 by Lindz

[humbleopinion]

2 hours ago, lids said:

Iris has said that she planned on having sex with her MAFS husband and she’s had oral sex with people who have since left her and she doesn’t appear to be scarred by

Do not think Iris stops talking long enough to have played the pan flute...if you get my drift...wink, wink

She yammered on and on and on as she gave the friendly groin handshake ..

Betcha she put a latex glove on like the girl in the convertible in Animal House

[princelina]

20 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I think on the basis of looks which initially is very important most couples seem evenly matched. They don't want someone storming out of the wedding in tears because they are repulsed by a person looks.

Yeah they already had that and I guess once was enough 😂

18 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

People judged both Elizabeth and Amber for sleeping with their husbands too quickly and criticized Iris and Deonna for being prudes. Whilst, the word "slut" was never uttered. The women were judged for jumping into bed too quickly or for not giving up the sex quick enough.

I feel like when we talk about the timing of the sex it's not about being slutty/prudish so much as how we think it will affect their marriage.  I feel like most of the marriages that work out did NOT do it on the wedding night but did on the honeymoon or soon after.

6 hours ago, NannyBails said:

Regarding Amber, maybe her way of coping after people in her life abandon her (mom, Matt) is to think they hate her, and that's why they did what they did. 

I think she was just seeking a response:  "I don't hate you; I think you're great!"  That type of thing.  She definitely needs to read He's Just Not That Into You!!  I used to date losers for way too long until I read that book 😄 

[configdotsys]

On 9/19/2019 at 12:40 AM, barbarag said:

I think that Keith said he wasn't ready to have a wife just because he couldn't take any more of  Iris' sanctimonious attacks on him.  Always the gentleman,  he took the blame upon himself and avoided saying that he simply couldn't stand her. 

Keith wasn't ready to have a wife. If he was, and was unsuccessful in his quest, he could have applied to be on this show. But he didn't. He was recruited. A guy who is not ready to settle down yet but has a budding music career that needs a kickstart was the perfect mark for the show to target. I totally believed him when he said he wasn't ready to have a wife. He just wanted the teevee time and the producers wanted a telegenic, smooth dude that women would tune in to see. They sweetened the pot by pairing him with someone he would not have to get entangled in a sexual relationship with. 

On 9/19/2019 at 9:59 AM, Yeah No said:

As much as I love Deonna and Greg, they remind me of that couple in the State Farm "She Shed" commercial.  Greg is like Victor, the wimpy husband holding the limp hose and Deonna is like the emasculating Cheryl who is going to get an even "chi-chi-er" she shed.   Some people online have theorized that Victor was the one that burned down the she-shed, probably to get her back for treating him so poorly.  Let's hope Greg doesn't get to that point, LOL!  😮

I wish I could love this post a million times because it is just perfect. I will never see that commercial in the same way again.

On 9/19/2019 at 1:05 PM, lids said:

To clarify, every single women on the show gets:

-referred to as some kind of slut (even, and sometimes especially, Virgin Iris of the Oral Sex). 

-constantly called crazy and said to be in need of counseling 

-criticized for dress and grooming

-referred to as a liar, gold digger, stalker

I just don’t see this overall messaging with the men.

I think Matt is a total prick and even that is understating it. I think Greg is a whipped doormat and Victor from the She Shed commercial (thanks @Yeah No), Keith is fake and used the teevee time for nothing more than exposure and publicity and Jamie is skeevy, lumpy out of shape, muffin topped, totally unattractive jerk with a mean streak and takes pleasure in being mean and cruel to Elizabeth. I have made this pretty clear in my posts and so have others.  

On 9/19/2019 at 2:47 PM, DocTerv said:

I'm going to sit by sometimesjennifer the other people who rooted for Deonna and Greg and so we can clap and cheer that we were right. I think D/G did their work and grew together quietly off camera. I think they share a very dry sense of humor that may not be obvious to outsiders but the two of them get each other. 

I think they should hang out with Keith/Kristine and RickyBobby/Danielle and have a lovely life. 

Oh, and IIIIIris. PLEASE take it DOWN about 10 notches with the self congratulations.

In my view, watching a television program and forming your own opinions about the participants based on your own intuition or interpretation of what you are shown isn't a competition that involves right and wrong. I like reading all the different points of view that people have and even if I vehemently disagree with them, I can appreciate them as being just as valid as my own view but I guess if clapping and cheering and proclaiming yourself right because they stayed married means that much, then clap away, I guess.

I think I am going to DVR the next season and binge watch several episodes at a time. I just can't deal with all the repetition in this show. The constant flashbacks to the weddings and previous conversations, the filler lunch dates to talk about nothing that we have to sit through. It just gets so boring. God bless the FF button.

Edited September 21, 2019 by configdotsys
fixed a cut off sentence

[Liberty]

34 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

God bless the FF button.

Lovin' it

[watchingtvaddict]

1 hour ago, configdotsys said:

I think I am going to DVR the next season and binge watch several episodes at a time. I just can't deal with all the repetition in this show. The constant flashbacks to the weddings and previous conversations, the filler lunch dates to talk about nothing that we have to sit through. It just gets so boring. God bless the FF button.

Probably going to need the FF button next season with 5 couples and 2 hour shows 

[StatisticalOutlier]

22 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

And people are saying Beth is only staying with Jamie for his money.

Well, there has to be something to explain it.

.

11 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

But another, people are stating she had frigid type reactions to the questions & I think again that's from being upset they were doing the activities on camera when they had agreed not to - but - she was already on camera in the moment & needed to handle it.

But to me, that doesn't explain why she said on the after-show that she'd engaged in oral sex.  I can't remember exactly how it came up, but it struck me as something that she definitely didn't need to say at that moment.

.

6 hours ago, qtpye said:

One thing that really pissed me off was both Jaime and Beth lying about wanting children because it  increased their chances of getting picked for the show. They are lucky they both felt the same way.

I'm confused.  I saw them both say they didn't want to have kids.  They were lying about that?  Or are you saying that they said some other time (that I must have missed) that they did want kids, and that was a lie that increased their chances of getting picked for the show?

[Yeah No]

15 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

I thought he was quite clear actually. She was sexually immature (and immature in other ways but I don't think he said that). He didn't want to be the person to help her shape her sexuality. Bottom line - he got a divorce because he didn't want to be married to Iris. It doesn't get a whole lot clearer than that.

15 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I don't believe this part was all her fault - Keith didn't want her. He has said he did not want to be the one to "teach" her anything sexually. Maybe he watched to see if there was any spark between them, but mostly I think he was riding out the weeks until over - he did not want a virgin, & Iris's personality probably just sealed the no-deal for him.

4 hours ago, configdotsys said:

Keith wasn't ready to have a wife. If he was, and was unsuccessful in his quest, he could have applied to be on this show. But he didn't. He was recruited. A guy who is not ready to settle down yet but has a budding music career that needs a kickstart was the perfect mark for the show to target. I totally believed him when he said he wasn't ready to have a wife. He just wanted the teevee time and the producers wanted a telegenic, smooth dude that women would tune in to see. They sweetened the pot by pairing him with someone he would not have to get entangled in a sexual relationship with. 

I think that if there was even a glimmer of a spark of romance between Keith and Iris things might have turned out much differently even if Keith was recruited and not actively looking for marriage.  People can suddenly become ready when they meet a special person, even if they have a music career to promote or other motivations.  I'm sure he was at least open to seeing what might happen.  I actually think Jamie is an example of that.  He was Mr. Picky all his life until that certain person came along that pressed all his buttons and voila, ♫ "sweet mystery of life thank God I found thee" ♫......he's ready.  If Jamie had gotten stuck with an Iris people might have been saying similar things about him and he would be the one saying he wasn't ready for marriage.  I don't think Keith isn't ready for marriage.  He just isn't ready for marriage WITH IRIS.

When I look at Iris, I find it hard to imagine any guy finding romance with her.  She spends so much time throwing up road blocks to any kind of romance and genuine intimacy that it's no wonder Keith soon gave up trying to achieve that with her.  Not to mention that her irritating and yes, IMMATURE personality just naturally pushes men away.  Even if Keith was the marriage-readiest guy in the world I don't think he would have clicked with her, and wouldn't blame him if not either.  I think for a guy that probably decided early on that Iris wasn't for him, he handled the situation the best he could.  I don't understand why he should be expected to try to make the relationship into something he realized it could never be.  I would never blame someone for that, especially when I understand why it could never be.  I would blame them for acting like a dick or a douchbag in the process (like Matt), but Keith didn't do that at all.  He really did nothing but treat Iris with respect.  He's not a bad person, in my opinion.  People can go on a show like this for multiple reasons.  Just because he was recruited and might like the idea of promoting a career (which I'm not convinced was one of his motivations anyway) doesn't mean his motivations couldn't also include being open to meeting a special person, nor does it necessarily mean he's a dick.

Edited September 21, 2019 by Yeah No

[watchingtvaddict]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I'm confused.  I saw them both say they didn't want to have kids.  They were lying about that?  Or are you saying that they said some other time (that I must have missed) that they did want kids, and that was a lie that increased their chances of getting picked for the show?

They lied on their application/to the experts/producers about wanting kids. 

They were both relieved to discover the other had lied about wanting kids when they revealed the truth. 

[Lindz]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

I think for a guy that probably decided early on that Iris wasn't for him, he handled the situation the best he could.  I don't understand why he should be expected to try to make the relationship into something he realized it could never be.  I would never blame someone for that, especially when I understand why it could never be.  I would blame them for acting like a dick or a douchbag in the process (like Matt), but Keith didn't do that at all.  He really did nothing but treat Iris with respect. 

Really?? We wanted him to try or LEAVE, NOT put on a bs show. How is faking & misleading Iris better than walking away? How was it respectful to make her think they're building a relationship the whole time & NEVER reveal the truth that he was FAKING & blindsiding her on Decision Day. Matt faked it too.

[AussieBabe]

I don’t see Keith as being fake. I think he wanted a wife before his grandmother passed, so she could see him get married before leaving this earth. I don’t believe this was for a music career. For all of Iris’ great qualities like educated, well spoken, great with children, etc., she IS immature and does have a personality that isn’t for everyone. She would be a lot to take with her two drink minimums, OCD about sinks and outdoor clothes, and hot or cold intimacy. I saw him as playing nice because he was with an emotionally immature woman-child who has zero self-awareness and couldn’t handle him telling her he doesn’t like her personality, wasn’t attracted to her in a sexual way, etc. He read the room early on. He wasn’t mean to her. Should he have cut off all contact and not had dinners post-divorce day? Maybe but if Iris had the dating experience he mentioned, she would know what was up. That’s on her for believing that there was ever a chance in Hades of them reuniting. She said he needed to improve if they were to get back together after the decision day episode. What about what she needed to improve on? Sometimes two people can be great individually and not meant for each other.

She asked if he had gotten his rocks off—when it was none of her business—but the catch-22 is, if he had given her a direct answer, she would’ve totally burst into tears, felt rejected all over again, and wondered why he didn’t love her or want her. Her own mother told us every relationship Iris has been in ended quickly and was difficult. So no the problem isn’t just Keith. There’s something off with Iris, too. I don’t think it’s just virginity because plenty of women wait 90 days like Steve Harvey suggested or are celibate/abstinent by choice and in healthy relationships.

He was respectful in how he ended the marriage and gave her valid reasons. Her response? Using Beyoncé’s discography to boast about the ring being off her finger. She couldn’t just say she was saddened that their marriage didn’t work, do some self-introspection, and wish him well? That’s what a mature response would’ve been to me. YMMV, though.

[Stinamaia]

On 9/19/2019 at 5:00 PM, sometimesjennifer said:

Well said. You are cordially invited to join our small delegation in the Deonna Appreciation Lounge. We have snacks and fluffy doggies (downstairs only). 😜

I’m bringing brownies - with and without nuts, and my own fluffy doggie.

i love so much about Deonna.   She’s lucky to have gotten a good patient man who worked with her to build a relationship.  Think how many of these women would have gone into a tail spin in they said “I love you” and the man was silent.  Deonna understood and it’s cute that Greg said “I love you” after Deonna showed she could be a calm help mate in time of need.  

I could go on and on about her cute sense of humor and how she perks up Greg and how Greg is the steady man she needs.   Out of these women, she’s the one i’d like to have a cozy conversation with.  

Edited September 21, 2019 by Stinamaia

[configdotsys]

1 hour ago, AussieBabe said:

I don’t see Keith as being fake.

Taking Keith out of the equation here and just picture a regular, random person who is attractive, educated, has a good job, has no problems finding women, is young and wants a career in the music industry. He's approached by a television program that legally marries strangers and they ask him to participate. This is a person who who does not need this show in any way, shape or form. And he says okay. Then they pair him with a neurotic virgin who acts like a 12 year old one minute and an 80 year old the next and he's got it easy. He tells himself to Keep Calm and Tolerate the Wife for 8 weeks over an over and stays cool no matter what in order to present the image he (and the show) want the public to see. 

I just can't buy that there was no quid pro quo there. He played it perfectly. He never got upset with her or raised his voice or appeared angry. That's very easy to do if you are not emotionally tied to a situation. He just waited it out and kept his indoor voice on. And came out looking like a prince to most viewers.

Why Iris went on the show is a total mystery. I got a vibe that she was hoping to be discovered. I can see why some of the others signed up for the show: Greg, Deonna, Amber, Jamie and Elizabeth. They came across as legit unable to find romance, but the rest of them had an agenda and it was not to find a spouse. 

One of the most uncomfortable moments in this show was Amber, who despite her newfound spine, was STILL trying to get engage Matt and win his approval and be nice to her. She said something like "blah blah, right?" and looked right at him expecting him to agree with her and he did not even acknowledge that she was sitting there and she looked upset about that. Fuck him, Amber. Why on earth would you want to be cordial with such a piece of trash? 

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, Lindz said:

Really?? We wanted him to try or LEAVE, NOT put on a bs show. How is faking & misleading Iris better than walking away? How was it respectful to make her think they're building a relationship the whole time & NEVER reveal the truth that he was FAKING & blindsiding her on Decision Day. Matt faked it too.

I and many others on this board have already said this many times, but I don't know how much clearer Keith could have been with her.  He was very up front with her about his concerns over her emotional maturity and whether that meant he felt they had a future together.  He told this to her face to face and she was not happy about it, but instead of addressing it honestly she doubled down and copped an attitude, which she expressed on camera several times.  I don't call what he did "faking it" or "blindsiding" her.  Keith's behavior was VERY different from Matt's.  It was IRIS that was delusional that they were "building a relationship" and still harbored hopes that he would say yes on decision day.  If I could see his NO coming from a mile away on my couch even WITH all the screwy editing, so I don't know how she (or the stupid so-called "experts") could have missed it.  And I did see it coming and posted about it on this board prior to decision day.  If Iris is that clueless after all he said to her that the show even showed us, you can't blame Keith.  I think it is more than obvious that Iris IS that clueless given all we have seen of her including the reunion show. 

And BTW, the couples are told NOT to divulge their decisions to each other prior to decision day if they have any doubts, so this is not "blindsiding" but part of the show.  This is not fully stated but obvious to me after all these seasons.  I don't know ANY participant in this show (other than Heather who bailed after a week or so) that has been THAT up front with their partner if they were sure they were going to say "no".  Of course, the couples that were certain they wanted to go on usually gave each other positive signals beforehand but even THEY go into decision day nervous about their spouses answer.

[Yeah No]

44 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

Then they pair him with a neurotic virgin who acts like a 12 year old one minute and an 80 year old the next and he's got it easy. He tells himself to Keep Calm and Tolerate the Wife for 8 weeks over an over and stays cool no matter what in order to present the image he (and the show) want the public to see. 

I just can't buy that there was no quid pro quo there. He played it perfectly. He never got upset with her or raised his voice or appeared angry. That's very easy to do if you are not emotionally tied to a situation. He just waited it out and kept his indoor voice on. And came out looking like a prince to most viewers.

I think this description could apply to any number of men on this show.  Other than being recruited (because I'm not sure he was) and wanting a music career, Neil Bowlus could be inserted here, and he was someone that came out smelling like such a rose that if anyone dared question his sainthood in the way he dealt with with Sam it was roundly criticized on this board.  And BTW Sam was similarly as delusional as Iris was on decision day that he might say "yes" because she felt things were going so much better with him (after she stopped abusing him) but that was only because Neil was doing what you say above and riding things out to the end without confrontation.  And she had a real tearful meltdown when he said no, too, but Neil still came out smelling like a rose and even his nastiness on social media afterward has STILL not changed a lot of people's minds about him.  I don't know what kind of teflon that guy is made out of, but I think Keith deserves a little of that too.  Iris is a total wacko and belongs in the same room with Sam for different reasons.

Edited September 21, 2019 by Yeah No

[Liberty]

I was just considering the two females who where headed for divorce court were both on camera going through their spouse's dresser drawers.  Amber finding Matt's ring, and IIIIris finding Keith's condom box.  At least there was some humor in IIIIris asking is he was some kind of nymphomaniac, but no humor with Amber.  Wonder if they were expecting to find a love letter or what they were looking for. Creepy.  Sent an early message to both Keith and Matt about privacy in their marriage.

Wonder if they had boundary problems in other areas too?  Is it really considered normal to go through some else's dresser?

[Kareem]

2 minutes ago, Liberty said:

I was just considering the two females who where headed for divorce court were both on camera going through their spouse's dresser drawers.  Amber finding Matt's ring, and IIIIris finding Keith's condom box.  At least there was some humor in IIIIris asking is he was some kind of nymphomaniac, but no humor with Amber.  Wonder if they were expecting to find a love letter or what they were looking for. Creepy.  Sent an early message to both Keith and Matt about privacy in their marriage.

Wonder if they had boundary problems in other areas too?  Is it really considered normal to go through some else's dresser?

Interesting. They both also came with bathroom rules.  Strange priorities of Amber and Iris.  

Boundaries also went out the window when Iris asked if he had had sex since D-Day.  

[Lindz]

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

I don't know how much clearer Keith could have been with her.  He was very up front with her about his concerns over her emotional maturity and whether that meant he felt they had a future together. 

Uh. Like I said, that's bs, stringing her along. Yes. She's soooooooo stupid for not reading between his bs lines. He could've just been an adult & said, "I'm done. I'm not trying anymore. What do you want to do?" They could've both played nice for the camera. He could've just left.  Why are those such foreign concepts?? The spouses should have some idea what their decision is & fake surprise when it's confirmed. She didn't see it coming, so he put on such a good show, even she believed it..😂

[Lindz]

Not-so-subtle messaging. They must've ordered it just for them..😂😂

[watchingtvaddict]

4 minutes ago, Lindz said:

Not-so-subtle messaging. They must've ordered it just for them..😂😂

Why are the still together?

On the one hand, I believe people on this show should be serious about marriage (be there for the long haul) and willing to deal with the highs and the lows and work through the tension that is having a third party (the camera crew/production) in your marriage. But, on the other hand this couple seems so bad for each they should just call it quits. 

[red12]

1 hour ago, configdotsys said:

Why Iris went on the show is a total mystery. I got a vibe that she was hoping to be discovered.

Hmmm... I wondered from the beginning about the odd combo of Christian virgin waiting unsuccessfully for Mr. Right willing to go on a 2nd tier reality show and marry a stranger. Your comment could be part of the reasoning. If she and Keith had worked out, they probably would have needed a booking agent to arrange all of the churches, conferences and youth / young adult singles groups wanting to book them. She could have even started a "wife school" (Google/ Facebook it) to swindle desperate women out of money "training" them to be deserving of Chirstian wifehood. 

It actually speaks to Keith's character that he didn't take the easy route and stay with Iris and launch a gospel career from this platform. 

As it is Iris could still have a chance at an "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" / "Jesus is the Best Boyfriend" type of book and launch her wifely redemption story once she marries.

[watchingtvaddict]

25 minutes ago, Lindz said:

Uh. Like I said, that's bs, stringing her along. Yes. She's soooooooo stupid for not reading between his bs lines. He could've just been an adult & said, "I'm done. I'm not trying anymore. What do you want to do?" They could've both played nice for the camera. He could've just left.  Why are those such foreign concepts?? The spouses should have some idea what their decision is & fake surprise when it's confirmed. She didn't see it coming, so he put on such a good show, even she believed it..😂

Do we know that Iris was willing to hear him though? Every time Keith had an answer for why they weren't a match, Iris was able to give an example of why he was wrong. He tried to explain it wasn't just her virginity that was a problem but her whole demeanor, and she just heard "virginity". 

I feel like Keith probably tried to have "off camera" conversations with her but she only heard "virginity" as a problem. In the end, Keith knew he had to tell her something positive along with the negative to justify his decision and even then Iris was blindsided because she believed she would stay married.

After hearing the "successful" couples chat about the experience, I believe production plays a significant role in the marriage and people who are serious about being married will opt to stay married for a few weeks to see if they're compatible once the cameras stop rolling.

Keith wasn't serious about being married... or he wasn't willing to take on the task of working with a virgin who brought nothing to table when it came to sexual intimacy. We won't know because Iris really was a handful. 

[Neurochick]

I really feel for Amber.  I wish she didn't have sex with Matt so early on because she has abandonment issues.  I wish she would have waited because anybody can present themselves well on the first day, or the first week, especially if you're in a beautiful, exotic location (their first time was on their honeymoon, I believe).  

I want Amber to watch this commercial over and over again.  "I've got to love me too."

[OnTime]

On ‎9‎/‎19‎/‎2019 at 6:55 PM, Liberty said:

If Matt demonstrates he was all about the money by sticking with MAFS until payday, why not take some of Amber's imaginary $80K salary?

Middle school student raises hand in class and says "Ms. Bowles, are you cranky today because you didn't have sex last night?  Class is more fun when you have sex every night".

Oh Amber!

She just wanted to be Mrs. Gwynne so badly.

She probably practiced a millions times saying "Now class, remember I'm married now and I'm Mrs. Gwynne. See I have my new name  over there on the blackboard."

[sasha206]

I thought Iris was so gorgeous the first episode and now I don't.  Hated the wig she was wearing.  There's something about the way she holds her head up when she talks that makes her less attractive.  She's still very pretty but wow, I thought she was an absolute stunning woman first episode.

[sasha206]

1 hour ago, watchingtvaddict said:

Do we know that Iris was willing to hear him though? Every time Keith had an answer for why they weren't a match, Iris was able to give an example of why he was wrong. He tried to explain it wasn't just her virginity that was a problem but her whole demeanor, and she just heard "virginity". 

I feel like Keith probably tried to have "off camera" conversations with her but she only heard "virginity" as a problem. In the end, Keith knew he had to tell her something positive along with the negative to justify his decision and even then Iris was blindsided because she believed she would stay married.

After hearing the "successful" couples chat about the experience, I believe production plays a significant role in the marriage and people who are serious about being married will opt to stay married for a few weeks to see if they're compatible once the cameras stop rolling.

Keith wasn't serious about being married... or he wasn't willing to take on the task of working with a virgin who brought nothing to table when it came to sexual intimacy. We won't know because Iris really was a handful. 

Or he just wasn't into her.  

Her virginity would never have been a problem if he truly connected with her.  He didn't.  

I think these two looked good on paper and made a beautiful looking couple. But when you don't feel it, you don't feel it.  

[Lindz]

Ugh. The random mouths hanging open shots showing surprise & the stupid music. 😒😒

[Lindz]

So. Pretty much NONE of us would be a MAFS contestant, WHY?

For me, 1st, cuz I MUST like looks!! 2nd if my spouse won't work with me, it'd be JOINT coasting til the end. I wouldn't tolerate bs. 😂

I don't believe they're perfect matches, it's more of maybe they're compatible more than not..😅

Edited September 21, 2019 by Lindz

[sasha206]

2 minutes ago, Lindz said:

So. Pretty much NONE of us would be a MAFS contestant, why? 1st, cuz I MUST like looks!! 2nd if my spouse won't work with me, it'd be JOINT coasting til the end. 😂 I don't believe they're perfect matches, it's more of maybe compatible more than not..😅

I don't think these "experts" really aim for perfect matches for every couple.  Would totally ruin the "will they stay married or not" episode!

[Lindz]

1 minute ago, sasha206 said:

I don't think these "experts" really aim for perfect matches for every couple.  Would totally ruin the "will they stay married or not" episode!

But isn't that the sell to contestants? You're "scientifically" matched... NOT it might be great, it might not. GOOD LUCK! 😅

[Purplelady25]

On 9/18/2019 at 9:04 PM, gonecrackers said:

They're expecting a what?  I have no idea what she said except that it wasn't a baby.

A niece or a nephew!                                                                                                           I thought she looked pregnant too.   That dress was so damn tight!

[gonecrackers]

12 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

But to me, that doesn't explain why she said on the after-show that she'd engaged in oral sex.  I can't remember exactly how it came up, but it struck me as something that she definitely didn't need to say at that moment.

As I recall JamieO asked her outright if she had, so she answered.

[humbleopinion]

Manipulated by MAFS...yet again..

We were hoodwinked into believing in the Virginal Iris...

 Early episodes she acted younger than her tree trunk rings indicated...happy, lilting voice, charming us with the fresh faced, eye wide, lovely hair and we fell for it....until the honeymoon was over for us and Keith....

We rolled our eyes at her sink regulations, duvet as a shield to outside germs, pillow danger zone rules..

We blinked when she got huffy about the lemonade and party food boundaries...

Her appearances on Unfiltered showed the truer Iris.....

Taking the hook out of  the side of my mouth......

[pdlinda]

On 9/18/2019 at 9:11 PM, Jeanne222 said:

Something is in the works for them to leave everything and move to California!  I suspect some kind of tv or radio work!

The buzz was that Jamie was offered a job at Google.  I believe that would be a high-paying job (of course, if he performs at whatever it is he does).

As for Beth LOLOLOLOL......I see a direct financial pipeline to "daddy" at any time (regardless of frequency) financial shortfalls occur in their household (the cost of living in CA is ASTRONOMICAL...I know because my daughter and her family live in the L.A. area and a small 2 BD condo/house will cost at least $3K/month).

I do not see Beth as "career" material and don't expect her ever achieve gainful employment. I don't believe her personality lends itself to effectively functioning with others in a business environment.

I see her dad fronting for her financially in each and every instance that Jamie tries to "pull the plug financially" on her or control her spending.

When that becomes loathsome to her and the sparks start flying, well....we can all surmise what Beth's next step will be.  LOLOLOL....

[humbleopinion]

Yes, The Bickersons will get a limited show of their move to Googleland....

Episode 1: The Move-In....The $3500/month Silicon Valley One bedroom shoe box apartment

 Episode 2: JealousDaddyRon and Drema visit

 Episode 3: All Hell Breaks Loose

Episode 4:  Packing up the U Haul to move Red back home....Hilarity on the cross country road trip as Amber and Red are Thelma and Louise....

Edited September 21, 2019 by humbleopinion

[configdotsys]

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I think this description could apply to any number of men on this show.  Other than being recruited (because I'm not sure he was) and wanting a music career, Neil Bowlus could be inserted here, and he was someone that came out smelling like such a rose that if anyone dared question his sainthood in the way he dealt with with Sam it was roundly criticized on this board.  And BTW Sam was similarly as delusional as Iris was on decision day that he might say "yes" because she felt things were going so much better with him (after she stopped abusing him) but that was only because Neil was doing what you say above and riding things out to the end without confrontation.  And she had a real tearful meltdown when he said no, too, but Neil still came out smelling like a rose and even his nastiness on social media afterward has STILL not changed a lot of people's minds about him.  I don't know what kind of teflon that guy is made out of, but I think Keith deserves a little of that too.  Iris is a total wacko and belongs in the same room with Sam for different reasons.

I'm not familiar with the people you mentioned, as I only started watching last season. I keep checking Amazon to see if they will add prior seasons to Prime Video (I am not going to drop the cash to buy seasons of a show that I'll only watch once) but all they have is season 1 and I haven't watched that one yet. 

As for Keith being recruited:

Monsters & Critics: Why did you choose to apply for Married at First Sight? Were you surprised when you got matched?

Keith Manley: Well, I didn’t actually apply for Married at First Sight. A casting director reached out to me explaining what it was about and the possibility of finding the love of your life was not something I could pass up on! Honestly, I was very surprised. Throughout the whole matchmaking process, I kept telling myself, “There’s no way I’m getting matched.”

https://www.monstersandcritics.com/smallscreen/married-at-first-sight-exclusive-interview-keith-manley-reacts-to-iris-caldwells-virginity-and-learning-about-it-from-his-mom/

I just think it's horseshit that Keith had any problems finding women. What I wonder more about is why do they need to recruit people to be on the show? Is that room full of people that we see before they match couples packed with people who were contacted by a casting director?

Edited September 21, 2019 by configdotsys

[Yeah No]

7 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

I'm not familiar with the people you mentioned, as I only started watching last season. I keep checking Amazon to see if they will add prior seasons to Prime Video (I am not going to drop the cash to buy seasons of a show that I'll only watch once) but all they have is season 1 and I haven't watched that one yet. 

As for Keith being recruited:

Monsters & Critics: Why did you choose to apply for Married at First Sight? Were you surprised when you got matched?

Keith Manley: Well, I didn’t actually apply for Married at First Sight. A casting director reached out to me explaining what it was about and the possibility of finding the love of your life was not something I could pass up on! Honestly, I was very surprised. Throughout the whole matchmaking process, I kept telling myself, “There’s no way I’m getting matched.”

I know that Keith was recruited but that doesn't mean he didn't want to meet the "love of his life" like he says in his answer here.  A lot of men are recruited for this show, it doesn't mean that all of them are just looking for some free advertising for a business or a career on TV.  It does with some but I'm sure not with all.  It would be hard to figure that out, though.  I don't offhand know which (if any) men were recruited that ended up at least saying "yes" on decision day, as that would be an interesting thing to know.

[Lindz]

They're moving out of state? What step is isolation?? 😂

[configdotsys]

17 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I know that Keith was recruited but that doesn't mean he didn't want to meet the "love of his life" like he says in his answer here.  A lot of men are recruited for this show, it doesn't mean that all of them are just looking for some free advertising for a business or a career on TV.  It does with some but I'm sure not with all.  It would be hard to figure that out, though.  I don't offhand know which (if any) men were recruited that ended up at least saying "yes" on decision day, as that would be an interesting thing to know.

The post I quoted of yours said that you were not sure if Keith was recruited so my post was only to point out that he was invited to be on the show rather than applying himself. Maybe he was intrigued at the possibility of finding a wife. Not sure I buy that but we can only speculate because no one knows for sure what these people's true motivations are.

[MajorNelson]

5 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

17 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

But to me, that doesn't explain why she said on the after-show that she'd engaged in oral sex.  I can't remember exactly how it came up, but it struck me as something that she definitely didn't need to say at that moment.

As I recall JamieO asked her outright if she had, so she answered.

Actually what I recall was it came from Matt, sitting on the viewer's right, asking her about oral, to which she answered affirmatively.  I thought the question was a bit cheeky/direct and hearing it was coming from Mr. Few Words Douchebag, I was a bit surprised. 

Edited September 21, 2019 by MajorNelson

[MajorNelson]

8 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

I feel like Keith probably tried to have "off camera" conversations with her but she only heard "virginity" as a problem.

I think this a perfect explanation of what he was dealing with

[Hangin Out]

On 9/20/2019 at 7:49 PM, LittleTexas said:

You are all So on the mark about women being jealous of each other; I can tell you that gets Worse with age!  I am "older", and have friends who are jealous of young women we see, when we are out for a drink. My feeling is: "hey, I was There, I did That, it's their turn", and I am the Best "older woman" I can be.  As for Keith not wanting to deflower a virgin, I have 3 brothers, and I think they would have felt the same way.  In the long run, it was Emotional immaturity, with the virginity not really the prime focal point, when it came to Iris.  If she can have oral sex, then I guess she Can "warm up", so don't act all curly lip, when he tries to show some affection.  Too many mixed signals and stop signs, poor Keith.

At the end, I think he had Explained himself, ad nauseum, and she wasn't listening, so he stopped Trying. One can beat a dead horse only So long.  It seemed like she was more interested in JUST how long he was going to wait, and never considered his feelings, very often.

I think Greg and Deonna can make it, as she Was changing, at a reasonable rate, and appreciates Greg. Just needs to let him Know what, more often. Just because You don't like compliments, it doesn't mean your SO might not love them. 

The other two...I can't even. If they are still married today, I would be so shocked!

You are right.  Plus, I can’t picture Iris having oral sex because she probably doesn’t even know what it is.  She may act worldly, but is still a little girl 

[Stinamaia]

20 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

You are right.  Plus, I can’t picture Iris having oral sex because she probably doesn’t even know what it is.  She may act worldly, but is still a little girl 

I think it’s quite possible Iris has received oral sex.  I think it’s less likely she has performed oral sex on someone else. 

[Alexander Pope]

On 9/18/2019 at 7:06 PM, answerphone said:

Iris is certified crazy 🤦

Her penchant for talking about herself in the third person is a dead giveaway.

[PamelaMaeSnap]

On 9/19/2019 at 6:24 AM, Lacy4u said:

She said, "We're having a nephew"

A nephew

The first time she said it I heard it as "We're having an F.U." and thought, "Well, FU too."

Also, so very YES on Greg and Deonna being the she-shed couple. Spot on. 

Edited September 24, 2019 by PamelaMaeSnap
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