If It Wasn't For That One Thing: How Movies Could've Been Better

[Jeebus Cripes]

The singing scene in the first Hobbit film when they're throwing dishes around and whatnot. I understand that it's a children's book, and I've never read it, but I have read the LOTR trilogy and I know Tolkien likes his songs, but this scene ruined the entire film for me. It was such a jarring thing to consider; that this foolish nonsense would be occurring in the same universe as those three LOTR films. I hate that scene. Why in the world would Peter Jackson not choose to omit that silly song?

Edited August 18, 2014 by Jeebus Cripes

[Joe]

Because he regards Dwarves as comic relief, and whatever touch he had he lost. The scene is different in the book, and the rhythm of the song is different. I feel he messed up that and the pace of the Misty Mountains song. Among many other things. Very annyong.

[Danny Franks]

The singing scene in the first Hobbit film when they're throwing dishes around and whatnot. I understand that it's a children's book, and I've never read it, but I have read the LOTR trilogy and I know Tolkien likes his songs, but this scene ruined the entire film for me. It was such a jarring thing to consider; that this foolish nonsense would be occurring in the same universe as those three LOTR films. I hate that scene. Why in the world would Peter Jackson not choose to omit that silly song?

 

God, yes. That scene is the reason I have watched a total of 20 minutes (at a guess) of the Hobbit trilogy. I loved LOTR, both the books and the movies, but I was a little wary of The Hobbit being adapted because it is such a relatively simple adventure story. When I heard it was being stretched out to three movies, I felt it would be a mistake. So I never bothered going to see the first one at the cinema.

 

And when I got around to watching it on Netflix, I lasted until that scene, but just could not continue. I was embarrassed to be watching it, and I had to just switch it off.

 

But I don't feel that I've missed out on anything, because even the few minutes I spent with those five hundred (at a guess) dwarfs was more than enough.

[Bruinsfan]

I actually kind of liked the singing, but that interminable video game chase scene through Goblin Town was too much for me.

[Jeebus Cripes]

And when I got around to watching it on Netflix, I lasted until that scene, but just could not continue. I was embarrassed to be watching it, and I had to just switch it off.

 

Yes, it's embarrassing! That's exactly what I was feeling at the theater. I paid money to see a bunch of dwarves break out into a Disney song? That was not what I signed up for. Everything that followed was screwed up because I couldn't get over it.

 

I actually kind of liked the singing, but that interminable video game chase scene through Goblin Town was too much for me.

 

That was ridiculous. Peter Jackson needs to learn the less is more motto.

Edited August 19, 2014 by Jeebus Cripes

[Wiendish Fitch]

I actually kind of liked the singing, but that interminable video game chase scene through Goblin Town was too much for me.

That was ridiculous. Peter Jackson needs to learn the less is more motto.

 

 

Me, too, but I think his beard has grown inward and has infected his brain. 

[Haleth]

I wish he had stuck to the true spirit of the book, silly songs and all, and not try to build a 7+ hour reboot of LOTR.  There was no need for extraneous storylines derived from pretty flimsy notes in the appendices to pad the movies.  Keep it simple, keep it light, keep it fun.  "Less is more" is absolutely right.

[Joe]

I wish he had stuck to the true spirit of the book, silly songs and all, and not try to build a 7+ hour reboot of LOTR.  There was no need for extraneous storylines derived from pretty flimsy notes in the appendices to pad the movies.  Keep it simple, keep it light, keep it fun.  "Less is more" is absolutely right.

Tolkien once started rewriting the Hobbit to make it fit better with LOTR. But I believe a friend told him it's good, it just isn't the Hobbit any more. Apparently Jackson never heard this story.

Edited August 19, 2014 by Joe

[Bruinsfan]

I always liked The Hobbit better than the subsequent trilogy. Its brevity is a feature, not a bug, and I think it loses something of its fairy tale aspect when so many details are filled in.

[Jediknight]

God, yes. That scene is the reason I have watched a total of 20 minutes (at a guess) of the Hobbit trilogy. I loved LOTR, both the books and the movies, but I was a little wary of The Hobbit being adapted because it is such a relatively simple adventure story. When I heard it was being stretched out to three movies, I felt it would be a mistake. So I never bothered going to see the first one at the cinema.

Watch the Riddles in the Dark scene from the first one, it is awesome.  Of course it also features Andy Serkis as Gollum, so of course it was always going to be awesome.  I'd also suggest giving Desolation of Smaug a watch.  Smaug alone is great, Cumberbatch does a fantastic job with the voice.  Speaking of Desolation, had they spent less time on Gandalf, it would have been better.  Gandalf's scenes were the worst thing about the movie.

 

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 -

Killing off Gwen Stacy. I liked the movie, and rank it as the 3rd best Spidey movie, but killing off Gwen was a terrible move. I don't care if it's canon, Emma Stone was fantastic, and Gwen was extremely well written. At least let her survive till the 3rd one. Yes, Garfield nailed that scene, and the scene with Gwen's speech was great, but give us more time with Gwen.  That's what I think caused the movie to be a disappointment.

[ribboninthesky1]

I liked Gandalf in the LOTR trilogy, but god almighty, he annoys me as much as the dwarves do in The Hobbit films.  I've not read the book, but in the Hobbit films, I keep hoping Bilbo will throw his hands up and say some form of "Fuck this, I'm going back to the Shire!"  And maybe take Luke Evans and his children with him.  They're the only ones with any sense in the films to date.

 

For me, as one who hadn't read the books but loved the LOTR films, I really appreciated the theme of friendship in the trilogy.  That's not there with the Hobbit. Beyond the fantastical realm of the world itself, I feel that's partly why those films work, and the Hobbit films don't.  Frankly, I'm not that invested in what happens to the dwarves - never have been.  Now I still plan to see the last film, as I want to see the collateral damage of Smaug exiting the mountain.  But unlike, LOTR, I'm fairly certain I won't buy the DVDs, or ever rewatch the films in the future.

 

 

 

 

[wanderingstar]

I loved every part of There Will Be Blood except for the ending. I just didn't get it.

[ohjoy]

I think this topic is just a little too mild for what I just spent the last almost two hours watching.

 

All during this movie, I was so engrossed.  The scenery.  The story.  The narration.  The twists.  The dialog.  The acting.  Everything.

 

And then came the last 10 minutes, and I am like WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?

 

Yes, I am yelling. 

 

The movie was The Words.

 

If anyone here can explain the ending to me, please, be my guest.  I will thank you profusely for making me not think I just wasted two hours of my life.  ::giggle::

This is essentially what happened to me with The Fountain (although the fugue-inducing ending was longer than 10 minutes I think).

[BatmanBeatles]

The sequels to Back To The Future would have been better without Marty freaking out every time someone called him chicken.

[Sweet Tee]

Agreed.  Apparently, the writers thought that Marty was too perfect in the first movie and wanted to give him some sort of character arc.  So, they went with the chicken thing.  Would have been nice if they had put some effort into it and given him a real arc but this is what we got.

[Mindymoo]

Gillian Rosh,

 

My take on the ending was that Daniel Plainview no longer had to pretend anymore. When Eli, who he knew was a phony from the get go, came asking for money, he forced him to admit (under duress, mind you) that he was a false prophet and that god was a superstition.

After having just lost his son, he felt he had nothing left to lose, and decided to wail on him with the bowling balls and bowling pins, beating him to death.

That's my take on it, and it's actually my favorite part of the movie, heh.

Edited August 21, 2014 by Mindy McIndy

[Danny Franks]

 

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 -

Killing off Gwen Stacy. I liked the movie, and rank it as the 3rd best Spidey movie, but killing off Gwen was a terrible move. I don't care if it's canon, Emma Stone was fantastic, and Gwen was extremely well written. At least let her survive till the 3rd one. Yes, Garfield nailed that scene, and the scene with Gwen's speech was great, but give us more time with Gwen.  That's what I think caused the movie to be a disappointment.

 

This is actually why I won't be watching that movie.

The idea that they got so caught up in how 'cool' it would be to stick to canon and kill Gwen, that they never really considered the logic of doing it, or what it meant for Gwen as a character. It's always been a lousy example of 'fridging' in my view, and it reduced Gwen Stacy to a plot device. The most important thing about her is the fact that she dies, and I think that's a disservice to the character that they created in the first movie. Also, I love Emma Stone and really have little interest in the movies continuing without her. I would also speculate that if Spidey was in the hands of Marvel Studios, they would have put a lot more thought into Gwen's fate, and probably would not have succumbed to the trite idea of killing her, just because Gerry Conway killed her forty years ago. Because really, what does it add to the movie? What does it add to the series? Nothing, that I can see. Peter already had the burden of Uncle Ben's death, and of Captain Stacy's, there was no need to kill Gwen to add gravity to his mission. Stupid.

Edited August 21, 2014 by Danny Franks

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

The sequels to Back To The Future would have been better without Marty freaking out every time someone called him chicken.

Or, as John Madden pointedly asked in the Mad magazine parody, why is it OK for Biff to meet his future self, but if Marty meets his future self, some horrible paradox will form that will make the universe explode or whatever?

[methodwriter85]

I really wish Crispin Glover and the producers could've worked something out so he could've been in the movie.

[pootlus]

The singing scene in the first Hobbit film when they're throwing dishes around and whatnot. I understand that it's a children's book, and I've never read it, but I have read the LOTR trilogy and I know Tolkien likes his songs, but this scene ruined the entire film for me. It was such a jarring thing to consider; that this foolish nonsense would be occurring in the same universe as those three LOTR films. I hate that scene. Why in the world would Peter Jackson not choose to omit that silly song?

This is the exact point that I turned the movie off and it remains the only movie in my collection that I have not watched to the end at least once.

I was so glad that they didn't include all the stupid singing in LOTR but it appears they tried to make up for it by cramming it all into The Hobbit. And it should have been one movie, not three - but then I guess movie execs saw dollar signs.

[Joe]

 

It should have been one movie, not three - but then I guess movie execs saw dollar signs.

Apparently it was going to be two movies, but the execs encouraged PJ to stretch it out to three.

[Danny Franks]

Apparently it was going to be two movies, but the execs encouraged PJ to stretch it out to three.

 

Ironic, considering the fight that Peter Jackson originally had to get LOTR okayed as three movies. Still, I know I'll never see the Hobbit movies now, based on the first half hour of the first one.

 

Another souring note for a movie was with Scott Pilgrim vs The World. Why didn't they make any effort whatsoever to make Ramona even slightly likeable? She was just a thoroughly bored, unengaged, unengaging presence, through the whole movie. Scott has to fight her seven evil exes? Why? Why do any of them want her, other than that she's hot?

[Wiendish Fitch]

Another souring note for a movie was with Scott Pilgrim vs The World. Why didn't they make any effort whatsoever to make Ramona even slightly likeable? She was just a thoroughly bored, unengaged, unengaging presence, through the whole movie. Scott has to fight her seven evil exes? Why? Why do any of them want her, other than that she's hot?

 

 

Praise be, I thought I was the only one! Ramona was duller than tombs. I was once griping about this to some random guy, and he said he liked Ramona. I said,

"Don't you find her boring?"

His response?

"Yeah, but she's so hot!"

 

Huh. Basically the screenwriters' thoughts in a nutshell. I preferred Kim and Knives, at least they had personalities. 

 

Speaking of textbook Sexy Lamps (link is for those who don't know what I'm talking about), I desperately wish the character Sandra in Big Fish had been at least a touch more interesting. Instead, she has no agency, no identity outside of being Edward's Love Interest, and the personality of a tablecloth. And Will was trying to find out the truth about his father's life, but wasn't getting it from Edward… why didn't Sandra fill him in?! She's Will's mother, for crap's sake!! Why didn't she sit him down and tell him the truth, rather than beam approvingly at all Edward's bullshit? 

Edited August 24, 2014 by Wiendish Fitch

[Bastet]

I love every minute of A League of Their Own ... except when Dotty drops the ball, giving Kit - that big crybaby who needs nothing more than to grow the hell up - and her team the win.  I get mad every single time I watch it. 

[tribeca]

I love every minute of A League of Their Own ... except when Dotty drops the ball, giving Kit - that big crybaby who needs nothing more than to grow the hell up - and her team the win.  I get mad every single time I watch it. 

I grew up  in my sister's shadow.  No matter what I did.  Worked at to be good at my sister could come along and easily excel at it.  Most of time she was even interested.  So I understood how Kit felt most of the movie.  However I hate that Dotty dropped the ball & let her team down.  The first time I saw it I thought Dotty should not even have come back.

Edited August 26, 2014 by tribeca

[Kel Varnsen]

Or, as John Madden pointedly asked in the Mad magazine parody, why is it OK for Biff to meet his future self, but if Marty meets his future self, some horrible paradox will form that will make the universe explode or whatever?

I figure that Doc was just guessing, based on the fact that he really had no idea what would happen. Of course the fact that Doc came back from 2015 to 1985 and brought Marty into the future to save his son makes no sense. I mean he could have just stayed in the future and gone back a day or a week into the 2015 past and told middle aged Marty to keep an eye on his son.

[Brandi Maxxxx]

Of course the fact that Doc came back from 2015 to 1985 and brought Marty into the future to save his son makes no sense. I mean he could have just stayed in the future and gone back a day or a week into the 2015 past and told middle aged Marty to keep an eye on his son.

Well really it's because they weren't planning a sequel when they wrote the ending of Part I. But I have seen the theory that Doc was secretly trying to prevent Marty from screwing up his own life because of the whole "chicken" thing.

[methodwriter85]

   Remember the Daze is this 2007 indie film, which tried to be a Dazed and Confused for the Millennial Generation. It takes place over the course of the last day of school in a suburban Wilmington, NC in 1999.

 

    It had a really good cast that included Leighton Meester, Brie Larsen, Amber Heard, Alexa Vega, etc etc. It had a great soundtrack that did a lot to evoke the feeling of the late 1990's.

 

   The problem is that it tried to focus on too many characters. If it had just trimmed a few of the storylines (the Amber Heard plot of her flirting with her friend's neglectful boyfriend made absolutely no sense), and beefed up the ones that were really good (Alexa Vega's plot, Leighton's), they really could've had something there.

[paramitch]

My biggest pet peeve on this topic, for ever and ever and ever, is two movies plus a PS choice (NOTE -- SPOILERS! Broadcast News, Jerry Maguire, and Alien 3 -- you have been warned):

 

1. BROADCAST NEWS

In which Holly Hunter's Jane falls in love with Hurt's dumb but well-meaning character while Aaron (Albert Brooks) admits his own feelings to Jane (who does not return them) -- and then proceeds to be a dick to her for the remainder of the film.

 

I mean, his cruelty is over the top and breathtaking and it does not let up. He does everything he can to ruin her romance with the guy she actually loves, and then pretends that it's all due to a question of ethics and not petty backlash.

 

And for me,Aaron's over the top cruelty to Jane through the third act of the film just ruins the movie for me. Jane never once shows that she is attracted to Aaron, she never acts on it or betrays him, sends mixed signals, nothing. But his entire behavior pattern in act three is that she has betrayed him, and I just never buy it. All she does is act as a generous friend, and in return he blurs boundaries, lashes out, and torpedoes her chance with the guy who actually interests her.

 

Yes, Hurt is naive. But he cares for Jane, and shows repeatedly that he wants to be better at his job. So the problem for me is that his big betrayal comes off as more an error of ignorance than malice. When Jane confronts him, he actually argues fairly cogently that the line is hard to maintain when the industry "keeps moving the little sucker."

 

And then in the (horribly awkward) flash-forward, we see that Hurt has continued to evolve, and that he actually (for instance) will not be acting as his own managing editor in order to present the news at its highest level, and he recognizes that he cannot act in that capacity. Nasty Aaron is happy and married. Hurt is happy and married. Jane of course is still brittle and alone.

 

I know James L. Brooks famously couldn't finish the script and resolve the triangle -- and it shows -- but the non-ending was worse than simply letting Jane pick a side.

 

But MMV. I'm the only person I know who feels that Brooks is a loathsome dickward in this -- everyone else seemed to find him charming and funny.

 

2. JERRY MAGUIRE.

My main feeling at every single point of watching this film was that this was the story of a man who could not be alone. It's a subtext expressed as text more than once in the film. It's about a man who leaned on Zellwegger simply because he needed a crutch, he always needed a crutch, but he picked a great person thanks to her crush on him and willingness to be used -- and succeeded anyway. But are they soulmates? Hell to the no.

 

So I was totally with the sister (the wonderful Bonnie Hunt) at cringing when these two horribly codependent people decided to get married. And the scene where Jerry leaves because she's right, he doesn't really love her? Is great because of its honesty.

 

But then we have the whole Jerry running running running, then returning to her and the awful proclamation of love and the "You complete me" moment, and I just never ever buy it.  She doesn't complete him. She props him up.

 

These two people will last 3-5 more years together in the glow of that moment, no more. For me, the movie needed to end with Jerry realizing that he had made a friend in Zellwegger, but that he ultimately needed to be alone in order to get his shit together.

 

Anyway. Thanks for the chance to vent, I feel much better. ;-)

 

PS -- If I get a bonus answer here, I would like to proudly proclaim that "if it wasn't for that one thing" in a third major "whole movie" context? It's Alien 3. It took the gorgeous first two films (and their hard-won, deserved happy endings for Ripley) and shit all over them, and did so in the cruelest possible way. It took me three tries just to get through it, and even then, I hated everything but the acting (even the direction was simply early Fincher showing off way too gaudily -- too many shadows and slow-mo fan blades, etc.).  

 

I simply do not acknowledge Alien 3 at all, ever. It ruined everything in the first two films for me and is my personal equivalent of someone putting a postscript on "The Wizard of Oz" in which everyone died horribly moments later (and then later we get to watch their autopsies in clumsy "gothic" detail).  

 

(Weirdly enough, I actually kind of enjoyed Alien: Resurrection (I know, I know), but I simply look at it as an alt-universe kind of exploration. It doesn't bother me on the visceral level of Alien 3.)

[PrincessEnnui]

There's this scene near the end of Zombieland that always gets my goat. Columbus and Wichita are talking about a Sadie Hawkins dance Columbus didn't get invited to. Wichita is shocked that Columbus didn't get invited as it was "Girls' choice." She dismisses the whole group of girls as "Bitches." First time I saw that scene, it didn't bother me. Second time, it ruined the entire movie.

 

To start, Columbus isn't very attractive either personality wise or physically. Second, it was girls' choice. Every other dance it is boys' choice and plenty of girls feel crushed at not being picked. Third, Columbus clearly has a type when it comes to women. Odds are any girl who would have asked to that particular dance wouldn't fit it.

 

Let's not even get into the fact that Wichita is a con artist (before the ZA), who took most everything Columbus and Tallahassee had on them and left them to literally rot earlier in the movie. Some middle school girls didn't want to spend their Sadie Hawkin's dance with Columbus!? That's some right bitchy behavior there.[/sarcasm]

 

I went from liking Zombieland to hating it once I realized that. It changed the entire way I saw that movie forever.

[Bruinsfan]

On general principle I object to people discarding friendly or familial relationships over competition for a romantic partner (yes, I get that once you're in love the romance may eclipse all else, but surely there's a window of time in which one could realize that "winning" a person one isn't yet in love with is not worth torpedoing the friendship/sibling relationship over and back off). Plus in This Means War Tom Hardy and Chris Pine had much better chemistry with each other than with Reese Witherspoon. I think it would have been much improved if they'd used the alternate ending where Reese looks around to find the guys clutching each other, and followed it up with her and some new guy meeting the pair for a dinner party or couples night out.

[NoWillToResist]

How to Train Your Dragon 2, or, as I like to call it: How to Completely and Irrevocably Kill The Happy Vibe of Your Entire Franchise, You Dumb, Sadistic, Fucking Assholes.

 

Anyone who has seen the movie knows exactly which scene I am referring to...

Edited November 1, 2014 by NoWillToResist

[BizBuzz]

How to Train Your Dragon 2, or, as I like to call it: How to Completely and Irrevocably Kill The Happy Vibe of Your Entire Franchise, You Dumb, Sadistic, Fucking Assholes.

 

Anyone who has seen the movie knows exactly which scene I am referring to...

 

You owe me a new keyboard, I flipping spewed my drink out my nose when I read this.

[Crs97]

That should be the tag line when the DVD comes out.

[NoWillToResist]

 

You owe me a new keyboard, I flipping spewed my drink out my nose when I read this.

 

...sorry? :/

[BizBuzz]

...sorry? :/

 

HA!  Nothing to be sorry about, it was stinking hilarious. 

[GreekGeek]

I saw Flight on DVD over the weekend. It was good overall, but I could not believe that, the night before Whip's all-important hearing, his team 

doesn't take the bottles of booze out of the mini-bar.

[ribboninthesky1]

Regarding Flight,

I thought they did, but he managed to get into the connected hotel room's minibar. What blew my mind was that he needed cocaine to "sober" him up.

[GreekGeek]

Regarding Flight,

I thought they did, but he managed to get into the connected hotel room's minibar. What blew my mind was that he needed cocaine to "sober" him up.

Oh, OK, I missed that bit.

[Athena]

Moved some posts to How To Train Your Dragon 2.

[Crs97]

This is very nit-picky, but I really don't like the way The Fugitive ended.  Harrison Ford has had no chance to grieve the death of his wife.  I have always assumed that his escape was right after his trial and death sentence so it can't have been too long since her death.  Considering he was the prime suspect from the beginning he had been under a huge amount of stress.  Instead of ending with his emotional breakdown in the back of the police car, which is what I expected any person to do after the nightmare is over, we end with Tommy Lee Jones and Harrison giving each other these wry smiles.  Frankly, I expected one of them to say, "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."  It just didn't ring true to me in an otherwise amazing film.

[ChelseaNH]

There's usually several months between an arrest and a trial.

[Crs97]

IMO, several months isn't enough time to grieve the murder of your beloved wife, especially when your energy is spent fighting said murder charge.

[VCRTracking]

 

I went from liking Zombieland to hating it once I realized that. It changed the entire way I saw that movie forever.

 

I just think she was trying to make Columbus feel better. The guy had definite self-esteem problems.

[canter]

So I Married An Axe Murderer is one of my favorite movies, but I hate Nancy Travis in the role of Harriet.

[MrsRafaelBarba]

War of the Worlds (2005)

Would've liked it more, if those annoying kids died.

Especially the son.

[Raja]

Captain America The First Avenger should not have white washed America's racist history with integrated war Bond Tour audiences and Army units in Italy. All there was shown was one character being suprised by a Japanese American soldier. By making Hydra the big bad with an IQ prejudice you got little sense of Nazis being Nazis and the racial prejudice of the era which the Captain surely would have fought against at home as well as overseas

[VCRTracking]

That was a weird decision. I did like in the sequel when Nick Fury was driving and a cop car(who we don't know to be HYDRA yet) pulls next to him and they glare at him and Nick goes "Do you want to see my lease?"

[Wiendish Fitch]

Deleted because spoiler isn't working.

Edited November 19, 2014 by Wiendish Fitch

[Raja]

Maybe because I am a native to the area but I found the ideal that Santa Monica was evacuated save a few people in a police station in Battle: Los Angeles more science fiction then the thought of aliens invading the earth. They easily could have had a squad cutoff from the main force in many ways other then lets save two children with the entire world at war.