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19 Things I Hate About You: How the Duggars Infuriate


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While I'm sure that the Duggars think that people who post to these boards are "haters," the people here seem to be more concerned about Jana's well being than her parents. They remark over and over about how beautiful Jill looked at her wedding (it irks me no end that J'chelle couldn't even acknowledge that her daughter was a beautiful bride). I see concern expressed over and over for Mary and for the youngest girls. While I see plenty of snark about Ben and Jessa, there is also a lot of concern that they are unsuited for one another, and simply too young and too inexperience to understand the problem.

 

 

This x 1,000,000. 

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it irks me no end that J'chelle couldn't even acknowledge that her daughter was a beautiful bride

So much word. Have you ever heard her compliment any of them -- except perhaps for doing a great job packing the bus, or some such? 

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(edited)

Another thing that bugs:

 

Saying that they are leaving their family size up to the Lord when they are clearly not.

 

First there is he mind bogglingly creepy calendar of fertility on the refrigerator

 

 

Secondly, God gave them free will, reasonable intelligence, and access to birth control. This complete denial of responsibility for something that they are 100% responsible for is annoying. It's like cutting your own brake lines, getting in the car, getting in an accident, and then saying that it was the "Lord's will" that your car got wrecked.

Edited by cmr2014
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He has actually said that he finds Mullet at her most sexy when she's pregnant, so maybe he's got a severe fetish.

Ewww...Should have not read that while eating ice cream. He thinks he is some hot stud (more like major dud) since he married Mullet aka the young, hot cheerleader, and he is a real man since he knocked her up so many times.

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He has actually said that he finds Mullet at her most sexy when she's pregnant, so maybe he's got a severe fetish.

Eww is right. Not that I don't think a pregnant woman can be beautiful, but that does sound fetish-ish. After awhile wouldn't the surprise of (his seeming continued perception) the cheerleader letting the doofus impregnate her wear off? And I think we all know a father isn't determined by sperm but by his ability to be a real father. My ex & his long term fling still fooled around when she was big pregnant with her husband's child. Of all the cheating I found out about that squicked me out the most. So thinking on this is like a double dose of ick!
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I was just reading the latest issue of Food & Wine and something made me think of the Duggars. Tony Bourdain has a piece in it about three kitchen commandments and one of them is punctuality. "Arrival time is an expression of respect;" he writes, "it reveals character and discipline. Technical details you can learn; character you either have or you don't." For all their holier-than thou attitude and spouting about "character qualities" bullshit, the Duggars have neither character nor discipline. Their rude, disrespectful attitude toward other people's schedules (and even Josh and Anna's schedules, once they set up their own home) has always irritated me. Their refusal to recognize that anyone else's time is valuable seems to me one of the clearest expressions of their hypocrisy.

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The arrival of the Duggars a day early in the last season was nothing but another stupid storyline revisited. I have a hard time believing Josh and Anna did not know what was going on. They want the fame and fortune from being on the show so they should not be complaining.

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"Arrival time is an expression of respect;"

 

This totally nails why Duggar Time infuriates me so much.  If the Duggars really want to get places on time, they can; we've seen them do it over and over.  But only when it's things and people they can't push around.  The airports won't hold planes for "Duggar Time," and they get there on time.  But their friends and family, or small speaking engagements where everyone is in awe of them?  They just can't be bothered. 

 

It does indeed show a lack of character. 

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This totally nails why Duggar Time infuriates me so much.  If the Duggars really want to get places on time, they can; we've seen them do it over and over.  But only when it's things and people they can't push around.  The airports won't hold planes for "Duggar Time," and they get there on time.  But their friends and family, or small speaking engagements where everyone is in awe of them?  They just can't be bothered. 

 

It does indeed show a lack of character. 

And they are never late for their "Big Announcement" spots on morning television.  I did read a blog review about how they were running on Duggar Time for a book signing - I wonder if that was legit?

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Watching The Duggar's Graduation Party. Stop climbing and sitting on the tables and countertops! I guess if you didn't have enough adult supervision then you might not learn to stop climbing on things like that. I don't think there is anything super dangerous about it when the kids are older, but it's just sort of having good manners to not put dirty feet  on places you eat. Anybody grow up in a family where everybody climbed on things like this?

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Anybody grow up in a family where everybody climbed on things like this?

No. But again, my speculation about the way they raise their kids is that it's the whole Gothard thing -- e.g., the objective is to populate Gothard's "army" with as many "soldiers for Christ" as possible. Once the kids are out of the womb, I honestly don't think anyone cares how they conduct themselves as long as they're blanket-trained as infants, taught to instantly obey all authority, and toe the party line.

 

My other hypothesis: Michelle and Boob actually tried to instill manners/decorum in the older kids, but there are just too damned many now, and they've given up.

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(edited)

I worked in a Childcare center and the only time I saw anyone climb on furniture like this was when I was in the one year old room.  If one of the teacher was washing hands, the other doing art with the kiddos, then possibly one of the stragglers, in-between activities would be climbing on things they shouldn't because they were not not enough teachers to wrangle the rest of the group. This usually happened on days when they were high numbers of kids. Yes I think too many kids might just be the issue. I'll tell you if you have your hands busy shouting for a kid to climb off the table is not the main priority... This happened in classes where child teacher ratios were NOT ideal. It can be really fun, but 2 adults 10 one year olds is pretty intense! When you really think about it The Duggars are in constant Day Care Mode. Poor over stimulated kids!

Edited by dreadre
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(edited)

I discovered the Duggars a few years ago and recently did watch a few new episodes.

 

The one thing I find the worst? The fact that the older girls have to raise their siblings. It would be their parents job. But clearly, they are (and always have been) too busy making new kids (which they won't take care of themselves) or pimping out their fabulous lifestyle to various media outlets.

 

Then the way they are treating their adult daughters. It's truly ridiculous. These poor women are expected to take over the work and responsibility of adults in the household as teenagers, but are still treated as children even as grown women when it comes to personal independence.

 

Also, that some people claim that Michelle and Jim Bob are good role models and parents. They are not. I'm not saying they are the worst parents ever, but they are not doing their job. Which would be raising their children and taking care of them and nurturing them individually. They claim that love multiplies. Sure. You can also manage with little money if you are smart (and lucky). However, time doesn't multiply, and with so many children, it's simply not possible to be there for each one of them enough, no matter how good you are at organizing, there are simply not enough hours in a day to do that.

 

And don't be fooled, the Duggars are a family business. And Michelle is a career women. Who made her career out of having so many children. But still. While she is busy making appearances and books with Jim Bob, someone else is taking care of her children.

Edited by Sundaymorning
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Their missionary trips bother me because it really is missionary tourism. I remember on one trip they went by boat to a village that was destroyed either by a hurricane or an earthquake. I thought that it would have been great if they decided to stay there and help the people rebuild instead of passing out bibles.

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Why does the whole family have to be involved with there courting? How creepy is it to ask Jim bob to even meet the guy you like. Let the kids talk to there boyfriends privately....if you raised them that well, you have no worries! Are momma and daddy there on the wedding night?! This is why I can't watch this show anymore- I do see an episode once in awhile, but I find myself yelling at the tv....

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Why does the whole family have to be involved with there courting? How creepy is it to ask Jim bob to even meet the guy you like. Let the kids talk to there boyfriends privately....if you raised them that well, you have no worries! Are momma and daddy there on the wedding night?! This is why I can't watch this show anymore- I do see an episode once in awhile, but I find myself yelling at the tv....

 

"Privacy" doesn't appear to exisit in the Duggar world.  I know both kid's room have hide-away lofts in them.  It makes me wonder if Boob has them rigged with cameras...

Edited by MrMattyMatt
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I am bothered by the second generation (Josh, Jill) celebrity status - famous for being famous.  I'm guessing they see it as their private "ministry" to their "fans"...... I find it so offensive.  The constant pictures of themselves doing everyday (unremarkable) things, the obligatory public displays of affection.  Gah!

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I am bothered by the second generation (Josh, Jill) celebrity status - famous for being famous.  I'm guessing they see it as their private "ministry" to their "fans"...... I find it so offensive.  The constant pictures of themselves doing everyday (unremarkable) things, the obligatory public displays of affection.  Gah!

Yes, offensive is right and never forget that they are working and voting to take away many of our hard earned personal rights.

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(edited)

I can't stand Michelle's coldness to the kids. Just saw the episode where Jackson go lost at the airport (he was not quite 4). He is visibly upset but sitting on JANA'S lap being comforted with Michelle doing a voice over about how she was so upset that her little man was missing. Yeah right!

Edited by AussiesRule
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Reading about the jewelry box situation btw Jessa and Jana (how Michelle handled it)! So Jana loses her box when she did nothing wrong? Jessa should have given JANA something and been non Gothard approved discipline. Not harsh but you get the idea. That just screamed lazy on mullets part.

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Reading about the jewelry box situation btw Jessa and Jana (how Michelle handled it)! So Jana loses her box when she did nothing wrong? Jessa should have given JANA something and been non Gothard approved discipline. Not harsh but you get the idea. That just screamed lazy on mullets part.

What exactly was the deal with this jewelry box? What happend?

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It was Jana's treasured possession.  Jessa kept taking it because she wanted it/to piss Jana off.  J'chelle's solution was to make Jana give it to her. The Hell????

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Yes, offensive is right and never forget that they are working and voting to take away many of our hard earned personal rights.

Gawd, I want to triple this thought about these sweet-talking famewhores. Michelle and JimBoob are positively offensive.

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(edited)

The jewelry box story: Jana was at the Bill Gothard/ATI meeting and told the story. It was filmed for the show. Details via google: https://m.facebook.com/fanpage4duggars/posts/391346754267510

 

I remember posters feeling sorry for Jana that she had to give up her one prized possession to the haughty Jessa as a lesson in character development. It certainly didn't seem like Jana's choice.

Edited by BradandJanet
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I remember posters feeling sorry for Jana that she had to give up her one prized possession to the haughty Jessa as a lesson in character development. It certainly didn't seem like Jana's choice.

That's how I remember it too BUT it seemed so off that I thought the story was told wrong. (or Michelle is just nuts)

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That's how I remember it too BUT it seemed so off that I thought the story was told wrong. (or Michelle is just nuts)

It also seemed that Bitchelle was too lazy to take on the imperious Jessa, so she punished Jana instead, as What In The said upthread. The incident also hinted that the kids didn't have many personal items, so Jana's box was especially important to her. Jana has done some serious reframing from the way the episode showed the story.

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If I remember correctly the "jewelry box incident" went like this...when Jessa and Jana were younger in the old house, they had bunk beds. Jessa was on top and kept jumping on her bed which annoyed Jana as she tried to sleep. Jessa did this on purpose just to tease Jana. We all know Jana's demeanor is reserved, shy and truly a sweet girl. She asked Jessa to please stop doing that, and it made Jessa do it more. Jana then told Queen Michelle, who really didn't want to deal with it, told Jana to handle it herself even though she tried and failed. 'Jchelle suggested Jana make Jessa feel guilty for bothering Jana by giving Jessa a gift instead of getting angry with her. Of course, Jana obeyed, (which they are instructed to do without question), so she gave Jessa her only prized possession, her very own jewelry box. It did make Jessa feel guilty and she stopped jumping on the top bunk of the bed as Jana tried to sleep. That's how I remember they told the story in that "Gothard auditorium". Does anyone else remember it this way?

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I feel for Jana. I had to give up my beloved stuff monkey to a younger cousin because her parents were getting a divorce. I also had to give up my Barbie Camper I got for a birthday present because of a family we knew were having money problems, and her little  girl deserve it since I was not playing with it anymore. The mother had some serious mental issues and the father was a drinker. I love my camper, and to me, my barbies help me get through my rough childhood since my own mother had her own mental illness and my dad was an abusive drinker. I still had the teddy bear my dad gave me in 1977. I definitely will not be giving Teddy away even after my mother told me I should throw him out.

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(edited)

The whole things just seems rather silly and typical of the types of things that happen with children.  The fact that it caused Jana to break down in tears as an adult is what concerns me.  God only know what else has gone on in that household.

Edited by MrMattyMatt
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So let me get this straight -- Jessa is deliberately annoying Jana.   Jana tries to get her stop, no dice.  In fact the behavior gets worse.   Jana then goes to her mother for help.   To solve the problem JANA -- who has done nothing wrong -- has to give up a prize possession to get it to stop.   Excuse me, on what parenting planet is that right?   Sounds like Jessa has learned how extortion works.  

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Solving the problem would require J'Chelle to be an involved parent. That'll never happen. J'Chelle did what was easy for her, so she could go back to doing nothing. MOTY material, right there. 


Merylinkid: I bet she didn't learn about extortion from the SOTDRT. Is Jessa getting outside lessons?

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So let me get this straight -- Jessa is deliberately annoying Jana.   Jana tries to get her stop, no dice.  In fact the behavior gets worse.   Jana then goes to her mother for help.   To solve the problem JANA -- who has done nothing wrong -- has to give up a prize possession to get it to stop.   Excuse me, on what parenting planet is that right?   Sounds like Jessa has learned how extortion works.  

 

Friendly fire in Duggars' Righteous Army of God on Earth.

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I don't know if that has been mentioned, but I cannot stand the stifling of creativity!

 

I love visiting art museums and reading the placards that tell you what the painting is trying to get across. I used to think Picasso was a total weirdo as a kid and developed a newfound love and appreciation of his work after taking an art class in college and seeing some of his works in person. I remember when the wife of one of my teachers growing up said that her husband (my teacher) had to wipe away tears after walking through a Georgia O'Keefe exhibit. Artistic expression is powerful and something that brings peace and comfort to so many. I wish the kids could express themselves creatively. 

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If I remember correctly the "jewelry box incident" went like this...when Jessa and Jana were younger in the old house, they had bunk beds. Jessa was on top and kept jumping on her bed which annoyed Jana as she tried to sleep. Jessa did this on purpose just to tease Jana. We all know Jana's demeanor is reserved, shy and truly a sweet girl. She asked Jessa to please stop doing that, and it made Jessa do it more. Jana then told Queen Michelle, who really didn't want to deal with it, told Jana to handle it herself even though she tried and failed. 'Jchelle suggested Jana make Jessa feel guilty for bothering Jana by giving Jessa a gift instead of getting angry with her. Of course, Jana obeyed, (which they are instructed to do without question), so she gave Jessa her only prized possession, her very own jewelry box. It did make Jessa feel guilty and she stopped jumping on the top bunk of the bed as Jana tried to sleep. That's how I remember they told the story in that "Gothard auditorium". Does anyone else remember it this way?

 

I wonder if Jessa ever gave the jewelry box back or if she still has it. What a bizarre story.

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What I have noticed lately is there seems to be no real evidence of homeschooling. I haven't seen all the episodes but the only one I can really remember that showed homeschooling was one from several seasons ago (I think 14 Kids and Counting), and Michelle was teaching bankruptcy law (which I thought was a very odd topic, as there were kids from about ages 5-16 being taught.)

 

In a home where numerous kids are allegedly being homeschooled, it seems there would be evidence of it somewhere. Even if they use a computer based program and put the computers away before filming, and even if they don't want schooling to be filmed much due to the distractions filming would present, wouldn't there still be schooling items that are used along with the computer curriculum around?  I don't think I have ever seen a whiteboard, chart, stacks of books, map, calculator, science stuff, projects, drawings, anything.  

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In a home where numerous kids are allegedly being homeschooled, it seems there would be evidence of it somewhere. Even if they use a computer based program and put the computers away before filming, and even if they don't want schooling to be filmed much due to the distractions filming would present, wouldn't there still be schooling items that are used along with the computer curriculum around?  I don't think I have ever seen a whiteboard, chart, stacks of books, map, calculator, science stuff, projects, drawings, anything.  

 

They have a small bank of computers upstairs in small room, they showed a few of the howlers doing schoolwork on them being helped by Jessa and Jinger in a episode a year ago maybe.   Based on what we have been shown, the schooling they get certainly is not structured or consistent.  Apparently they are able to get GEDs in the end, so they claim.

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They have a small bank of computers upstairs in small room, they showed a few of the howlers doing schoolwork on them being helped by Jessa and Jinger in a episode a year ago maybe.   Based on what we have been shown, the schooling they get certainly is not structured or consistent.  Apparently they are able to get GEDs in the end, so they claim.

 

 

The computers got some air time in when they were all staying in Little Rock. They said they work though a program that tracks and scores their work as they go. I remember being almost impressed since the only other time I'd even seen school stuff it was the wisdom booklets and it looked like the whole crew was doing the same lesson at the same time. 

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I think I have figured out what it is about the Duggars that annoys me the most...I just binge watched a few episodes (from when they announced the next one on the Today show and Josh's engagement) as well as a few specials..and the thing that annoys me is that they don't have a single interesting thing to say about anything. Just "Hey! Look! We are a big family, isn't that neat?"

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The Duggars running around and agreeing with candidates who think a woman cannot get pregnant while being raped, and she should think her pregnancy after being attacked and raped is a blessing and should be happy and glowing because of her new little blessing. Of course, in their little minds, a woman brings it on herself. I guess a five year old little girl who is being molested by a family member or an eighty year old grandmother who is attacked in her own home ask for it. We had a case in my hometown where an elderly woman was raped in her own home. The guy said the scent of the Ben Gay she had on turned him on.

 

I do not agree with abortion per se, but in the cases of rape and incest, a woman should have a choice. I respect and admire women who decide to keep the baby or give the baby up for adoption after being raped. I wonder how Smugs, JimBoob or Ben would feel if their woman were attacked and became pregnant. Of course, they would want to keep the child, but I would not be surprise if they would end up hating the fact the child because of the reason why he or she came into the world.

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