Kalani & Asuelu: Cheeto Dust and Slut People

[Auntie Anxiety]

On 10/22/2020 at 6:49 AM, IllLitShips said:

Kalani just happened to find one of the worse people to lose her virginity to, get pregnant by, and to marry.

And have a second child with, before the first child was barely able to sit up by himself.

Edited November 4, 2020 by Auntie Anxiety

[CrazyInAlabama]

I've read that Mama Kalani is the only member that stayed in the church, so that further limits the daughter's prospects.   Unless the women were willing to go back to the church, that would limit their prospective dating pool from religious men.  

[IllLitShips]

10 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

And have a second child with, before the first child was barely able to sit up by himself.

That part bothers me, too.

[hookedontv]

5 hours ago, IllLitShips said:

15 hours ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

And have a second child with, before the first child was barely able to sit up by himself.

That part bothers me, too.

And had a second child despite having a boatload of marital problems, having no financial plan, and still learning about one another (and frankly not liking what the other has to offer). Totally irresponsible. 

[mamadrama]

I don't understand this relationship at all. The only thing I can think is that maybe Kalani prefers having someone to whom she feels "above." Someone she can boss around and low-key control. How in the world is this dude sexy to her, though?

I like the way she blames her kids on him for not liking condoms, though. Girlfriend, there are other types of birth control, not to mention the word "no"...

[Scarlett45]

On 11/23/2020 at 5:45 AM, mamadrama said:

I don't understand this relationship at all. The only thing I can think is that maybe Kalani prefers having someone to whom she feels "above." Someone she can boss around and low-key control. How in the world is this dude sexy to her, though?

I like the way she blames her kids on him for not liking condoms, though. Girlfriend, there are other types of birth control, not to mention the word "no"...

(bolding mine) I very much agree with this.

 

Also I think a LOT of women, place a great deal of value on having their children with the same man, much more value than they care to admit. Even if the guy is everything from "just not right for them" all the way to "an evil abusive POS"(I am not saying that's Asuelu, thats just an example), I think there are many women that want children, and want them with the same man- they don't care that much who that man is. Women can be just as sexually lazy as men, and socially its more acceptable for a woman to have one baby daddy than 2 or 3. I think Kalani fits in this category.

I can see her meeting someone later that is a great fit for her, and marrying again, but she will have had at least two kids by the same guy which was her goal.

[greekmom]

Interesting. We've have not seen Lew yet this season.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I'm sure that the couple make a lot off of social media, and the TLC /Sharp money.   I've read that they're going to be on the 90 Day cooking show on the streaming service.  

Edited May 12, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[Mrs. Hanson]

23 hours ago, greekmom said:

Interesting. We've have not seen Lew yet this season.

And I am good with that.

 

On 1/5/2021 at 1:58 PM, Scarlett45 said:

Also I think a LOT of women, place a great deal of value on having their children with the same man, much more value than they care to admit.

You mean Sarah from Love After Lockup with Michael??

[Scarlett45]

25 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

You mean Sarah from Love After Lockup with Michael??

I am not familiar with Love After Lockup, but you can see this trend a lot in the Teen Mom casts, and given the fact that Kalani cannot seem to stand Asuelu some of the time, her desire for children seems to be the only motivation to have any sort of relationship with him. I admit I am a bit behind this season (life stuff).

[CrazyInAlabama]

I bet Low is sick of setting in the house, saying his lines, and doing take after take.    

[Mrs. Hanson]

20 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I am not familiar with Love After Lockup, but you can see this trend a lot in the Teen Mom casts, and given the fact that Kalani cannot seem to stand Asuelu some of the time, her desire for children seems to be the only motivation to have any sort of relationship with him. I admit I am a bit behind this season (life stuff).

Sarah is/was in love (and married him while he was in jail) to a guy named Michael, who let's just say, fidelity was not his strong point.  Upon his release, or "off tether" as the kids say these days, she got knocked up.....again.  And he had multiple women on a string and yet she was/is trying to change him into a family man, which he will NEVER be.  She just can't quit him!  Or won't.......

Edited May 13, 2021 by Mrs. Hanson

[goofygirl]

This theory of the same "baby daddy" must be the same thing Kloe Kardashian is doing with her baby daddy.

[CrazyInAlabama]

So sponsorship is for life, not just 10 years?   So if Kalani divorces Asuelu, she should immediately buy him a one-way plane ticket to Samoa.    

This sponsorship for life has a three outs.   1. If the immigrant sponsored leaves the U.S.  2. If the immigrant becomes a U.S. citizen or 3. If the immigrant works 40 quarters, paying in Social Security,  

 

Edited May 24, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[greekmom]

Interesting that next week's episode shows Kalani at the lawyers and "lawyer" tells her and Low (who's on zoom) that since Low is sponsor that he is on the hook for Asuelu for life. Which is absolute bullshit or TLC editing.

As per online "An affidavit of support is a legally enforceable contract, and the sponsor’s responsibility usually lasts until the family member or other individual either becomes a U.S. citizen, or is credited with 40 quarters of work (usually 10 years)."

And yes divorce does not end the obligation.

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-processes-and-procedures/affidavit-of-support#:~:text=An affidavit of support is,work (usually 10 years).

[CrazyInAlabama]

Yes, in case of divorce if the person sponsored becomes a citizen, or leaves the country (aka a one way ticket to Samoa), the SS provision listed above in the other posting, or dies, the sponsorship will end.   Otherwise, it's forever.   

I can't see Asuelu being all that ambitious to be self-supporting, or become a citizen (passing tests for one), so Daddy Low is on the hook.     When 'dies' comes up, I can imagine Daddy Low getting a bright idea,   I'm betting that Asuelu's greedy mother and sisters know all of the requirements, and Asuelu would be happy to sit around and be supported by Low, while Asuelu just plays volleyball, and video games.  

There have been cases involving divorce, and sponsorship agreements for years.     The sponsor can be sued by the U.S. government for public assistance paid to the immigrant.          However, I can see Asuelu finding this out, refusing to go back to Samoa, and making Low write a check to support him.   

Edited June 7, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[politichick]

Didn't the attorney say the life sentence for Low might not apply because that went into effect after the fact when Trump became president? 

[mamadrama]

Kalani & Aseulu is what happens when you lug your virginity around forever and then lose it on a drunken tropical vacation. 

Source: also lugged my virginity around far into adulthood. 

[CrazyInAlabama]

On 5/31/2021 at 3:16 PM, politichick said:

Didn't the attorney say the life sentence for Low might not apply because that went into effect after the fact when Trump became president? 

   The lifetime sponsorship to 125% of the poverty level has been in effect for a lot of years, in the case of divorce.   I found court cases going back to 2007-2009, where people divorced, and the wife (in the two cases I saw) didn't get alimony (short marriages).    But, then the ex had to make up the difference between the ex's income, and the 125% of poverty level.    One case it was the wife who was the U.S. resident, was very well off, and the ex husband was suing for everything, and that's when the alternatives were mentioned to end support .   The visa person dies, leaves the U.S., pays into Social Security for 10 years, or becomes a citizen.

I'm hoping Asuelu will accept a one way ticket to Samoa, because if he goes to American Samoa, then Low will still be on the hook.   If Asuelu decides to sit on the couch and play video games in the U.S., then Low would have to support him.  

I can easily see Asuelu deciding working is too much for him, and choosing the sofa as his favorite place.    

Kalani is crazy for wanting to buy a house, or anything else while married to Asuelu.     If they split that will add one more complication to dividing assets.     

The picture of the car damage (front driver's side bumper,), looks like Asuelu rear ended someone, or turned left without waiting for traffic to clear.     I bet the trauma was worse for whoever he hit.  

Edited June 7, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[Chalby]

On 1/10/2019 at 9:57 AM, Drogo said:

LOL: per Kolonics, their mom is a behaviorist and "can instantly tell when someone is on the spectrum"... talk about malicious rumors.

What is a behaviorist?

[Chalby]

On 5/31/2021 at 4:51 PM, CrazyInAlabama said:

I can easily see Asuelu deciding working is too much for him, and choosing the sofa as his favorite place.    

Kalani is crazy for wanting to buy a house, or anything else while married to Asuelu.   

Does Asuelu know that Low is financially responsible? If he knows, I agree with you. Once he realizes nothing will happen to him if he chooses to be unemployed, he will abuse his new found power.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I'm sure the mother and sisters know all about the support in case of divorce.   That's why the despicable Mother A. was demanding divorce last season. 

[Baltimore Betty]

7 hours ago, Chalby said:

Does Asuelu know that Low is financially responsible? If he knows, I agree with you. Once he realizes nothing will happen to him if he chooses to be unemployed, he will abuse his new found power.

I am sure Low will be buying for a new or paying for the car repair that is not covered by insurance...Asuelo cannot be that daft to not realize who is paying for basically everything because he knows he is not.

Asuelo lives like a house cat.

[Mrs. Hanson]

I don't know how anyone can listen to Asuelo for more than a minute.  "I feel....like I want to cuddle (begins to cry)......my wife....(voice goes soprano) because I love her.......(continues crying.)

He is so draining.

Edited June 8, 2021 by Mrs. Hanson

[hookedontv]

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I don't know how anyone can listen to Asuelo for more than a minute.  "I feel....like I want to cuddle (begins to cry)......my wife....(voice goes soprano) because I love her.......(continues crying.)

He is so draining.

You're so right, Asuelo is completely exhausting to listen to. My ears bleed when he opens his mouth and speaks. 

[Alapaki]

On 5/24/2021 at 12:30 PM, CrazyInAlabama said:

So sponsorship is for life, not just 10 years?   So if Kalani divorces Asuelu, she should immediately buy him a one-way plane ticket to Samoa.    

This sponsorship for life has a three outs.   1. If the immigrant sponsored leaves the U.S.  2. If the immigrant becomes a U.S. citizen or 3. If the immigrant works 40 quarters, paying in Social Security,  

 

Yes, it is for life, unless the conditions for cutting it off are met.  The 10-year figure comes from the fact that it would typically take an immigrant (who doesn't want to leech off of his sponsor forever) about 10 years to qualify out of the sponsorship requirement.

I can see the next spin-off now: 90-Day Fiance - The Support Years

[sagittarius sue]

6 hours ago, Alapaki said:

I can see the next spin-off now: 90-Day Fiance - The Support Years

It could lead to a new theme for a crime series.  Murders that occur because someone tires of paying support for eternity.

[Gobi]

9 minutes ago, sagittarius sue said:

It could lead to a new theme for a crime series.  Murders that occur because someone tires of paying support for eternity.

That’s probably happened.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Of all the young, unattached male workers at the resort where Kalani decided to lose her virginity, she ended up with Assholeu? Talk about desperation! 

[Mrs. Hanson]

Just now, Auntie Anxiety said:

Of all the young, unattached male workers at the resort where Kalani decided to lose her virginity, she ended up with Assholeu? Talk about desperation! 

It is a puzzler.  One for the ages!

[CrazyInAlabama]

They could look at Hybrid minivans for ride share.  

Who discusses having another baby, or the number of kids they want in front of some stranger at the car dealership?    

[zenme]

14 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

They could look at Hybrid minivans for ride share.  

Who discusses having another baby, or the number of kids they want in front of some stranger at the car dealership?    

No one. Had to be producer set up. 

I think most couples  discuss what type of vehicle they are getting before going to the dealership. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

16 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

Who discusses having another baby, or the number of kids they want in front of some stranger at the car dealership?    

I think it’s a typical Sharp setup. I’d bet the farm that Kalani is pregnant yet again and the producers are using it for a plot line. It’s a form of the slow landing approach; you set the stage (“Gee, I‘ve been really busy but I’ll do everything I can to come to your party”) and then, at a later date, spring the news (“I just CANNOT get away. Sorry.”). 

[Colfrmb]

After hearing Asuelu sing a little bit on the last episode, I want to hear him sing Silent Night. I think we have found his calling.

[Persnickety1]

22 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

They could look at Hybrid minivans for ride share.  

Who discusses having another baby, or the number of kids they want in front of some stranger at the car dealership?    

I think this was Sharp's designated episode for vehicle acquisition.

Ronald and Tiffany also dragged their asses to a car lot with a ridiculous ensuing conversation from which the salesman excused himself.

Yawn...do better, Sharp.  I could care less what kind of vehicles these chucklefucks drive (or want to drive).  

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

On 11/4/2020 at 6:10 PM, Auntie Anxiety said:

And have a second child with, before the first child was barely able to sit up by himself.

I sincerely think Kalani grew up in such a restricted way that she does not believe, or know that she has the agency to obtain and use contraceptives. She may have been told an IUD is birth control that essentially causes an abortion, or that the pill will give you breast cancer, and not understand SHE could buy condoms and make them conditional to intercourse. It is really sad in today's times that she doesn't get it.  Can anyone in a largely Mormon Utah community comment here on what the dr offices are like? Are contraceptives not pushed? (I am thinking back to Seeking Sister Wife I think one of the husbands is a pharmacist, and he's Mormon). 

[Auntie Anxiety]

3 hours ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

nd not understand SHE could buy condoms and make them conditional to intercourse.

Assholeu is against condoms as they are used only by slut people.

[Grifter Lives]

On 7/31/2021 at 6:23 PM, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

I sincerely think Kalani grew up in such a restricted way that she does not believe, or know that she has the agency to obtain and use contraceptives. She may have been told an IUD is birth control that essentially causes an abortion, or that the pill will give you breast cancer, and not understand SHE could buy condoms and make them conditional to intercourse. It is really sad in today's times that she doesn't get it.  Can anyone in a largely Mormon Utah community comment here on what the dr offices are like? Are contraceptives not pushed? (I am thinking back to Seeking Sister Wife I think one of the husbands is a pharmacist, and he's Mormon). 

About a year ago, Kalani posted on Instagram that she worked in a group home for teen mothers before 90-Day Fiancé.  She would have been living in California then.

I suspect that she wanted to have a child when she became pregnant with Oliver.  When she had Kennedy, she claimed that her pregnancy was a surprise and she couldn't use birth control because she was breastfeeding.  So, there may be some (or a lot of) willful ignorance on her part.  

We know that Asuelo believes that condoms are for slut people and he wants 7 or 9 children.  So, I doubt there is any intelligent discussion about contraceptives.

[Auntie Anxiety]

1 hour ago, Grifter Lives said:

So, I doubt there is any intelligent discussion about contraceptives anything.

FTFY

[CrazyInAlabama]

After the preview when Asuelu says they should move to Samoa, Kalani should come up with a reason he has to travel alone, and to find a place for them to live.    Then, just never finance a return ticket, or help him come back.   Then tell the immigration people that he left the country, and tell them the date.      I think if Asuelu stays out of the U.S. for a year, then he's no longer a resident.   

It's either Papa Low and Lisa's house, or rented for filming for them. 

Kalani needs to think very hard on what her life would be like in Samoa.    U.S rights are not available there, just what Samoan laws say, and I bet she would never be able to get the boys back to the U.S. if she was foolish enough to go there.     I can see Mama A. telling Asuelu to keep the boys in Samoa, and then Kalani would have to (really her dad) pay for their support, and then Mama A. too.   Also, going to American Samoa is a bad idea, it's just a short drive to the Samoan side, and Kalani would never get the kids back.   

I bet the feeling sorry for Asuelu, and trying to be nice to him will end by all of Family Kalani when they hear his ridiculous idea of moving the family to Samoa, and living in a hut.   

Edited August 12, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[Back Atcha]

Aren't they still living in Kalani's parents' home?

[zenme]

On 8/7/2021 at 5:57 AM, CrazyInAlabama said:

After the preview when Asuelu says they should move to Samoa, Kalani should come up with a reason he has to travel alone, and to find a place for them to live.    Then, just never finance a return ticket, or help him come back.   Then tell the immigration people that he left the country, and tell them the date.      

It's either Papa Low and Lisa's house, or rented for filming for them. 

That would be a great idea if she were without children, however, she is not. Those kids deserve to have their father, which is why, I suspect, she continues to work on her relationship with Asuelo. While he needs a lot of guidance on what fathers in America do, he seems to really love them and want them. 

[Twopper]

On 6/8/2021 at 7:00 PM, Gobi said:

On 6/8/2021 at 6:50 PM, sagittarius sue said:

It could lead to a new theme for a crime series.  Murders that occur because someone tires of paying support for eternity.

That’s probably happened.

There is an episode---maybe more than one-- of Forensic Files where I have wondered if that was the reason someone was killed. 

[CrazyInAlabama]

Kalani & Asuelu vs. Mama A. & Tammy the Terrible should be a highlight of part 2.   Good point that Tammy only has two kids, but wants Kalani to have nine like her mother.  

If Samoa is so great, how come Tammy moved to Washington, and Mama A. goes back to Samoa for months at a time?

Edited August 19, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[mamadrama]

Aseulu's sister's house for sale in Samoa.

So much for living there for free...

 

* $159,000 USD

 

[Back Atcha]

Will Tammy BEAT UP every potential buyer until she gets the $$$ she wants?

 

Edited August 22, 2021 by Back Atcha
A merge that would make no sense.

[Back Atcha]

On 8/8/2021 at 10:10 AM, zenme said:

While he needs a lot of guidance on what fathers in America do, he seems to really love them and want them. 

And for that reason, those children should be subjected to poverty--to the primitive and hardscrabble life Asuelu finds comfortable (and prefers) in Samoa?  We see how "educated" he is; do those little American children deserve that new lifestyle because "they deserve a father"?  What kind of a mother will Kalani eventually be trying to live an ancient culture that values women only for the number of children they produce and the amount of services they provide to the head of the household?

[zenme]

4 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

And for that reason, those children should be subjected to poverty--to the primitive and hardscrabble life Asuelu finds comfortable (and prefers) in Samoa?  We see how "educated" he is; do those little American children deserve that new lifestyle because "they deserve a father"?  What kind of a mother will Kalani eventually be trying to live an ancient culture that values women only for the number of children they produce and the amount of services they provide to the head of the household?

You totally edited my comment.  You’ve made it sound as though I think Kalami and the boys should move the boys to Samoa and live Asuelo’s Samoan lifestyle.  Please go back and read my post in it’s entirety, or don’t take a small portion of my wording to make it fit your comment. 

Edited August 22, 2021 by zenme

[CrazyInAlabama]

I love that Asuelu's idea of 'living free and raising Taro' in Samoa is $400k Samoan to buy, and only 1/4 acre of land (the listing price for one of the brother's houses that's for sale).   

Kalani would be a fool to go to Samoa with the boys, where she couldn't get the boys back to the U.S., because they're not going to be subject to American custody laws.     I can see Family Asuelu keeping the boys, and getting money from Papa Low to even see them.   

Edited August 23, 2021 by CrazyInAlabama

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

11 hours ago, Back Atcha said:

Will Tammy BEAT UP every potential buyer until she gets the $$$ she wants?

 

Will she beat up her family til they give her a $$$ commission?