Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[blueray]

How about, no matter what type of job you have - whether it's an office job, a cop job, hospital job or whatever - you are free to come and go from your place of employment as you please. There is no 8-4 or 9-5 (okay, detective work is a bit different), or dictated lunch hours or whatever. But if one needs to leave work to deal with some personal issue, the character just....leaves. No repercussions, no having to ask, no bosses complaining, etc. It's like the work place is where the character goes to for an hour or two a day, to break up the drama occuring in their personal life.

That is true. The only show ironically I think of that talks about this is Charmed. And they all magically get jobs where that doesn't matter if they miss days, especially in later seasons.

[backformore]

How about, no matter what type of job you have - whether it's an office job, a cop job, hospital job or whatever - you are free to come and go from your place of employment as you please. There is no 8-4 or 9-5 (okay, detective work is a bit different), or dictated lunch hours or whatever. But if one needs to leave work to deal with some personal issue, the character just....leaves. No repercussions, no having to ask, no bosses complaining, etc. It's like the work place is where the character goes to for an hour or two a day, to break up the drama occuring in their personal life.

Not only that, it's also perfectly normal and acceptable to have family members , friends, lovers, children, etc., appear at your workplace to discuss things like a kid's bad grade, party planning, or to have a relationship talk. In all my years of working, I have only once had someone show up to the office, and that was to tell me that a friend had been murdered.

I take that back. A boyfriend showed up at my office once, possibly to check up on me. He soon became an ex boyfriend. Don't do that!

[lucindabelle]

Wow that's true. Maybe it's different if you work in a small business in A small town but yes it is one of he hose weird bt things.

[MaryPatShelby]

I think it's because tv writers just don't remember what it's like to work at a job where physical presence is required. They go in for their meetings but the rest of the time they don't.

Kind of like how on tv, shows set on he he east coast show flowers blooming in November (Gilmore girls had flowers in bloom in cape cod over thanksgiving! No. Just no. And then Rory mispronounced the name of the commencement speaker.. Kundera... Accent on kun.... No way that was spoken aloud and she misheard it). Ghost whisperer was particularly annoying. See in California, desert climate, sure you dress for warm weather in day and out on jacket in evening in December. On fast coast? Um no. Long sleeves in December. Sorry.

Just a minimum of research. After all lots of people not only me are or have been bicoastal. It's annoying.

Also similar is how no one ever seems to wear shorts, or even capris, in the summer or a place with consistent warm weather. Sometimes they show guys in shorts, but it's an anomaly and women hardly ever. One thing I like about The Middle is that they actually dress like they live in the Midwest with its ever-changing seasons.

[Bella]

Wow that's true. Maybe it's different if you work in a small business in A small town but yes it is one of he hose weird bt things.

 

My dad owned a small business in a small town, and it was close to the schools my brothers and I attended. We'd walk there after school and wait for Mom to come pick us up, but in bad weather we often waited for Dad to give us a ride home. In the latter situation, we might be there a couple of hours, depending on how busy things were. We had a space we went to where we could do homework or read, we had rules, rules, and more rules, and we had two specific employees we could go to if we needed an adult and Dad wasn't available. It was not even remotely like anything I've ever seen on TV, but we were technically family members going to his office.

[DittyDotDot]

I work in a small newspaper office and my nieces come hang with me at work sometimes. And I come and go from my job whenever I need. As long as my work gets done, my boss doesn't get caught up in our schedules. Of course, a retail business or some sort of customer service job would be difficult to pull this off. Doctors especially crack me up because don't they have appointments to keep?

 

I always thought Dead Like Me handled this pretty well. George's alter ego used to have to make up stupid excuses and would get in trouble for being late or missing work at her office job because she had to go reap someone's soul midday.

Edited October 11, 2014 by DittyDotDot

[lucindabelle]

Yeah I could see it in retail in smaller towns, actually. It's the showing up at corporate office thing that seems weird. But local stores, definitely. Now I work in a local newspaper and there is zero room for anyone to hang out so that would never fly.

[shapeshifter]

I work in a library, and if I am 2 minutes late getting to the reference desk, I get reprimanded, even if I stopped between my office and the desk to help a patron.

[lucindabelle]

Wow your library is mean. I hope that's not true of all libraries. I always thought if them as such nice friendly places. If you're one minute late to rehearsal it goes on an equity report.

[ALenore]

How about, no matter what type of job you have - whether it's an office job, a cop job, hospital job or whatever - you are free to come and go from your place of employment as you please.

 

Yes, this bothers me too, especially about lunch.  On TV, everyone, no matter what type of job they have, seem to be able to take 2 hour lunch breaks at fancy restaurants nearly every day.   Oh, occasionally they show people eating lunch at their desk, or buying from a street vendor in New York, but most people seem to get to take a lot longer lunch breaks than I do. 

[scarynikki12]

I hope that's not true of all libraries.

 

 

 

It depends.  Like lots of managers, some will understand that the average human cannot teleport to their side the second they call while others cannot wrap their heads around the idea that walking from one end of the place of business to the other might result in being stopped by co-workers or customers and slow the requested person down.  I have a girlfriend who worked at a library and was disliked by her manager to the point that she was placed in the only office on the other side of the library and never informed when staff meetings or updates were occurring to the point that she missed her own goodbye party when she resigned because her manager was supposed to tell her to come to work early and didn't bother.   

[kiddo82]

Also similar is how no one ever seems to wear shorts, or even capris, in the summer or a place with consistent warm weather. Sometimes they show guys in shorts, but it's an anomaly and women hardly ever. One thing I like about The Middle is that they actually dress like they live in the Midwest with its ever-changing seasons.

When they do show folks in cold weather they just casually stroll along in the snow and have half hour long conversations looking as if they couldn't be more comfortable. No blue lips, red faces, or inability to articulate a sentence secondary to all the shivering. In real life, I play a little game in the winter called "Run to the car as fast as you can and don't look back."

[Brandi Maxxxx]

Wow your library is mean. I hope that's not true of all libraries. I always thought if them as such nice friendly places. If you're one minute late to rehearsal it goes on an equity report.

Do yourself a favor and stay away from Pawnee, Indiana.

[ChromaKelly]

Also similar is how no one ever seems to wear shorts, or even capris, in the summer or a place with consistent warm weather. Sometimes they show guys in shorts, but it's an anomaly and women hardly ever. One thing I like about The Middle is that they actually dress like they live in the Midwest with its ever-changing seasons.

Yes, The Middle is one of the few shows that has a middle-class family in a seasonal climate dress like normal people. OK, Sue's outfits can be a bit weird, but Frankie especially is dressed like a normal, suburban mom. I love that she wears sneakers and an unfashionable winter coat. She looks like someone I would see at the grocery store. Mike dresses like my dad. Brick is wearing normal clothes without being all Super TV Nerd.

I would do a double take if I saw some of these "average" people from other shows in my suburban town. Normal people don't sit around the house in mini skirts and high heel boots.

Edited October 13, 2014 by ChromaKelly

[janie jones]

Or wear high heels when lounging around the house.

 

When they do show folks in cold weather they just casually stroll along in the snow and have half hour long conversations looking as if they couldn't be more comfortable. No blue lips, red faces, or inability to articulate a sentence secondary to all the shivering. In real life, I play a little game in the winter called "Run to the car as fast as you can and don't look back."

I was watching a rerun of Mike and Molly the other day, which takes place in Chicago, and there was a scene where it was snowing out and all Molly was wearing for outerwear was a wrap.

[Kromm]

Here's the rare reality show entry.  These are rare because in truth people are actually doing the behavior in the real world, but the driving impetus is the TV camera--and it's my contention that if the TV camera wasn't there they would never have happened.  Ergo, it's still "Only on TV".  

 

In this case it's that Only on TV do people think the likes of Gordon Ramsay (or even the lower rent version, Robert Irvine) is going to come into your financially restaurant, eat your crappy food, and like it.  You'd think they'd know better...but they never seem to.  Cue up any episode of Kitchen Nightmares, the older UK Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares, the current shitty US show, Hotel Hell, or Irvine's Restaurant Impossible, and the scene always plays out the same.  There's ALWAYS some delusional person in charge of food (be it a chef or an owner who pretty much goes into shock when Ramsay or Irvine doesn't like their food.  It takes a filter of both desperation, but also something about being on TV, for someone to do a Talking Head interview where they insist their food is good when it so demonstrably always isn't.  And even if Ramsay and Irvine are exaggerating, it takes the medium of TV being involved for this ludicrous scenario to play out.

[GreekGeek]

Here's the rare reality show entry.  These are rare because in truth people are actually doing the behavior in the real world, but the driving impetus is the TV camera--and it's my contention that if the TV camera wasn't there they would never have happened.  Ergo, it's still "Only on TV".  

 

In this case it's that Only on TV do people think the likes of Gordon Ramsay (or even the lower rent version, Robert Irvine) is going to come into your financially restaurant, eat your crappy food, and like it.  You'd think they'd know better...but they never seem to.  Cue up any episode of Kitchen Nightmares, the older UK Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares, the current shitty US show, Hotel Hell, or Irvine's Restaurant Impossible, and the scene always plays out the same.  There's ALWAYS some delusional person in charge of food (be it a chef or an owner who pretty much goes into shock when Ramsay or Irvine doesn't like their food.  It takes a filter of both desperation, but also something about being on TV, for someone to do a Talking Head interview where they insist their food is good when it so demonstrably always isn't.  And even if Ramsay and Irvine are exaggerating, it takes the medium of TV being involved for this ludicrous scenario to play out.

In fairness to the people on the restaurant shows: There are lots of restaurants about that serve good food, are clean, have competent staff who get along...and tank. They may be serving the wrong type of food for the area: the pizzeria in the retirement community, for instance. Or there are already too many of that same type of place in the area and people already have their loyalties. Sometimes the location just seems cursed. There is a restaurant in my neighborhood that in the past five years has been an Italian place, a Viennese restaurant, and is now an Irish pub. I thought the food was fine in its first two incarnations, and the location can't be beat: right next to a movie house. So unless the food and the kitchen are really gross to see, I would not be so quick to judge those folks who think Ramsey or Irvine is going to say their food is fine. In the notorious Amy's Baking Company episode, the place was hospital clean and the pastries (which Amy didn't make) looked beautiful.

[Gudzilla]

 

Also similar is how no one ever seems to wear shorts, or even capris, in the summer or a place with consistent warm weather.

My favorite example was on Supernatural when Sam and Dean went to Fort Lauderdale Florida and stayed in their traditional jackets with 4 layers of shirts underneath. 

[Cobalt Stargazer]

To be fair, most of Supernatural is shot in - wait for it - Vancouver, although the pilot was filmed in L.A. Then again, The Golden Girls was famous for its main cast always wearing layered outfits despite the fact that the show was set in Miami, so that doesn't really disprove anything.

[selkie]

As a Floridian who used to go to work wearing a sweater underneath a suit coat in August to keep from feeling frozen, I'll say not to underestimate the power of air conditioning in the Sunshine State. God had John Gorrie invent the air conditioner (okay ice-maker) after all, and we shall therefore set the summer thermostat to 64F in his honor.

[FormerMod-a1]

Well, The Golden Girls mostly took place in their own home, so they had control of the AC.  Really no need for sweaters and layers and long sleeves.  However, in the first season the clothes were more light weight, even when long sleeved, and sometimes Dorothy wore sandals.  It wasn't until later on that they were wearing velvet and slouch ankle boots and similar all the time.

[Bastet]

Exactly.  Having only visited Florida a couple of times during the two years my best friend lived there, I could nevertheless understand characters dressing warmer to counteract the ridiculous over-cooling going on in many public spaces.  But the GG characters were inappropriately dressed even in the home over which they had climate control.

 

I think Judith Light is one of TV's most underrated actors for many reasons, one of which is the fact that she was the only cast member of Who's the Boss - a show set in Connecticut - who would react when an exterior door was left open during an episode set in cold weather months. 

 

It certainly helps that the location shots were filmed in Vancouver, but The X-Files is one of the few shows that had its characters appropriately bundled up (before moving production to LA, anyway) -- we saw them in a variety of shapeless outerwear, opting for realism rather than showing off the fine forms of the stars.

[caci]

Years ago on the show "Vegas", the main character was walking next to a pool wearing a turlteneck and suitcoat.  Yet all the women in the scene were wearing bikinis.  I remember feeling bad for the women because even then I think I realized they dressed the main actor for the actual weather.  The women were dressed for the eye candy and they had to be cold.

[ganesh]

It certainly helps that the location shots were filmed in Vancouver, but The X-Files is one of the few shows that had its characters appropriately bundled up (before moving production to LA, anyway) -- we saw them in a variety of shapeless outerwear, opting for realism rather than showing off the fine forms of the stars.

 

Say what you want about the awful job they did with the mythology, or even if it was needed, but XF, production-wise was revolutionary. They were the first to have the actors light the scenes themselves, like when they're walking around with the high-beam Xe flashlights, and for doing stuff like playing the scenes in a total downpour, while actually wearing the right clothes, etc. 

 

The show lost something when it went to LA because stuff like that wasn't needed. 

[Cobalt Stargazer]

I've decided that when introducing myself, instead of saying "I'm Portia" or "My name is Portia," I'm going to start saying "They call me Portia."  People do that on TV, and it seems really dramatic. 

 

On General Hospital (don't ask), a new character introduced herself with the immortal line, "My frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriends call me Kiki." Yes, it was as ridiculous as it sounds.

[Bella]

Years ago on the show "Vegas", the main character was walking next to a pool wearing a turlteneck and suitcoat.  Yet all the women in the scene were wearing bikinis.  I remember feeling bad for the women because even then I think I realized they dressed the main actor for the actual weather.  The women were dressed for the eye candy and they had to be cold.

 

I wonder if cold sets might be the reason for overdressing characters who should rightly be wearing less. That wouldn't explain the people running outside in the dead of winter wearing a thin sweater, but maybe set comfort is more of an issue than we realize???

 

Does anyone know, because this is 100% speculation on my part.

[Bastet]

The AC is cranked to counteract the hot lights, so it evens out to a "normal" temperature on set.

[Bella]

The AC is cranked to counteract the hot lights, so it evens out to a "normal" temperature on set.

 

Aha! That's what I was wondering about without thinking it through all the way - counteracting the hot lights. Thanks.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Aha! That's what I was wondering about without thinking it through all the way - counteracting the hot lights. Thanks.

 

And this is why when All in the Family was on the air and Archie and Mike would be arguing, you'd see that Carroll O'Connor and Rob Reiner were sweating, because the lights were so hot.

[Bastet]

They try, and generally do a good job of keeping it comfortable, but it can certainly get warm enough under those lights that actors bundled up in thick outerwear will be stifling, and shucking those things off between takes. 

[Portia]

If shows really wanted to be realistic about how people in hot climates dress for AC, they'd show them wearing their regular summer attire with an extra sweater or jacket thrown on. I have a trusty old sweater that goes everywhere with me during the summer months, and I know a lot of people who keep a sweater or jacket at their place of work. You have to wear appropriate summer attire if it's 100 degrees outside.

 

Well, The Golden Girls mostly took place in their own home, so they had control of the AC

 

 

 

Devil's advocate here . . . where I live, if you're trying to keep your house at a moderate 72-75 degrees when outside it's 100 at midday and 85 at night, you're fighting a losing battle. For a couple of months of the year, we just put it on 68 (or lower) and leave it there--otherwise parts of the house will be miserably hot at midday. In the long run, our AC unit actually does less work this way. 

[FormerMod-a1]

But even 68 is too warm for cable knit sweaters, velvet and ankle boots.  At least for me.  I'd be wearing short sleeves and jeans.

[Portia]

But even 68 is too warm for cable knit sweaters, velvet and ankle boots.  At least for me.  I'd be wearing short sleeves and jeans.

Good point. Not sure why someone living in Florida would need those at all.

[FormerMod-a1]

I agree - it's probably mostly related to studio temperatures (whether hot or cold).

[selkie]

Good point. Not sure why someone living in Florida would need those at all.

You acclimate to the hot and get to a point when 68F seems deathly chilly.  (So very easy to tell local from tourist at the beach in Tampa and points north in the winter when it's 60F out- the tourists are in shorts and t-shirts and the locals are in jeans and sweaters.) And even in South Florida, it can get a little brisk in the winter at night and early morning, and you want a light coat or heavy sweater when you're headed off to work and the air temp is 55F.

Edited October 17, 2014 by selkie

[Gudzilla]

 

You acclimate to the hot and get to a point when 68F seems deathly chilly.  (So very easy to tell local from tourist at the beach in Tampa and points north in the winter when it's 60F out- the tourists are in shorts and t-shirts and the locals are in jeans and sweaters.) And even in South Florida, it can get a little brisk in the winter at night and early morning, and you want a light coat or heavy sweater when you're headed off to work and the air temp is 55F.

This is what my original point was (sorry it turned this thread into a weather debate) Sam and Dean would not be acclimated and that many layers would be uncomfortable, unless it was during our 2 weeks of winter*. I realize the reason is because of where they actually film, but this is an only on tv subject.

 

On that note only on tv can Dexter take his boat out of Miami and have mountains in the background of the shot.

 

* I suspect Sam and Dean would laugh at a south Florida winter.

[Bella]

 

On that note only on tv can Dexter take his boat out of Miami and have mountains in the background of the shot.

 

The entire world looks just like Los Angeles. Except when it looks like Toronto or Vancouver.

[Raja]

Inspired by an episode of Black Sheep Squadron which just aired on METV only on TV would a WWII  Imperial Japanese commando unit surrender with its fighting strength  intact just because their secret mission failed.

[Bruinsfan]

But even 68 is too warm for cable knit sweaters, velvet and ankle boots.  At least for me.  I'd be wearing short sleeves and jeans.

I can see it for retirees. My dad wears long johns and sweaters when it's in the upper 70s.

[topanga]

On The Divide, Alias, and countless other shows, when someone wants to visit a prisoner who might have valuable information about a new crime, and old crime, a corrupt cop, etc., the person just goes. They sign in and are immediately escorted to see the prisoner.

 

As someone who's had to visit unfortunate (unlucky?) relatives in prison, I know first-hand that it isn't that easy. If you aren't an attorney or a police officer, you have to get put on an inmates visitor's list, and this often takes a few days.

[lucindabelle]

Hah. I lived in Alabama for awhile and was always amused when people thought that New Yorkers wear cashmere twin sets in the summer. Uh,,, no, it's tropical in NYC. And while office buildings are often wildly over air conditioned, taxis and streets and subway platforms aren't so you have to dress for summer with sweaters. And velvet looks wrong after February just as bright white looks wrong in November.

But every buildingt in the south has ac because it's unbearable otherwise, you still dress for summer but a heat wave in the east is actually worse than most places in Alabama because dorms etc just don't have ac, I did a summer workshop at Dartmouth during a heat wave and had to take a shower and got to bed wet to have a hope of sleeping. Every dorm room in Montgomery had a window until you use ac until January. It would be 90 degrees and humid at six am.

California is a desert climate, not humid..l went to college there... And I think were giving the tv people too much credit, they dress the. Wrong because they don't remember or just don't know what it's like in a humid climate.

Edited October 21, 2014 by lucindabelle

[Rick Kitchen]

When I was in the Air Force, I attended a class for a month at Keesler Air Force Base in Biloxi, Mississippi, and my shirt would be dripping wet by the time I got out of class and back to the dorm for the day.  And you could set your watch by the 3 PM thunderstorm every day.

[MaryPatShelby]

On The Divide, Alias, and countless other shows, when someone wants to visit a prisoner who might have valuable information about a new crime, and old crime, a corrupt cop, etc., the person just goes. They sign in and are immediately escorted to see the prisoner.

 

As someone who's had to visit unfortunate (unlucky?) relatives in prison, I know first-hand that it isn't that easy. If you aren't an attorney or a police officer, you have to get put on an inmates visitor's list, and this often takes a few days.

Oh my gosh, I used to laugh so hard watching soap operas when one of the characters was in jail. There would be a long parade of Llanview (or wherever) citizens all visiting the jailed character to yell at him for awhile, and they'd stand right outside the cell, talking through the bars.  Only on TV.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Oh my gosh, I used to laugh so hard watching soap operas when one of the characters was in jail. There would be a long parade of Llanview (or wherever) citizens all visiting the jailed character to yell at him for awhile, and they'd stand right outside the cell, talking through the bars.  Only on TV.

 

They used to do this on General Hospital too. Two characters in particular were always being hauled into jail, but people were always showing up at the jail to either talk to them or yell at them or whatever the hell else.

[BoogieBurns]

Only on TV would Ray Romano and Patricia Heaton produce 3 blonde children. Also, the Full House Tanner kids are supposed to be half-Greek, half Danny Tanner. They are all blonde too. Were there no brunette kids actors in the 90's?

[Kel Varnsen]

Only on TV would Ray Romano and Patricia Heaton produce 3 blonde children. Also, the Full House Tanner kids are supposed to be half-Greek, half Danny Tanner. They are all blonde too. Were there no brunette kids actors in the 90's?

To be fair Rosanne and Dan Conner had 3 relatively skinny kids.

[ethalfrida]

Only on TV would Ray Romano and Patricia Heaton produce 3 blonde children. Also, the Full House Tanner kids are supposed to be half-Greek, half Danny Tanner. They are all blonde too. Were there no brunette kids actors in the 90's?

Wish I could give you 3 thumbs up for this one...

[potatoradio]

It's really easy to get a break in a case now that victims and witnesses can undergo hypnosis or whatever they're calling it now - some fancy name that includes memory. Apparently, all police officers/FBI agents are trained in how to do this and it looks pretty simple:

 

1. In a singsong voice, ask the victim, "take me to the scene. Are you there?"
2. Victim nods.
3. "Good...now, what do you notice?"
4. Victim starts freaking out because they are completely under and have perfect recollection
5. "It's OK...I'm here...just tell me what you see. What do you smell?"
6. Victim says h/she sees the criminal. (I say, "Duh.")
7. "Good...good...do you see a name plate? A license?"
8. Victim shakes head vehemently
9. "It's OK...you can do this...just read the license plate..."
10. Victim: "I smell perfume! It's made from saffron and stardust and sold only on Mars!"
11. "Excellent! Keep going...keep focused...what's on the license plate?"
12. Victim: "5...R...R...I think it's a....6? I can't! I can't!"
13. "It's OK. You can leave now."
14. Victim opens eyes. Is instantly back in the present day and runs out of the room

 

Well, no matter, a partial plate/name and special detail is always remembered and is enough to crack the case. Who needs DNA or forensic science or sleuthing skill? Hypnosis - no fuss, no muss, always successful. I am going to try this in other areas of my life. "OK, boss, now let's go to my performance review...are you there? Good...."

[Rick Kitchen]

It's really easy to get a break in a case now that victims and witnesses can undergo hypnosis or whatever they're calling it now - some fancy name that includes memory. Apparently, all police officers/FBI agents are trained in how to do this and it looks pretty simple:

 

1. In a singsong voice, ask the victim, "take me to the scene. Are you there?"

2. Victim nods.

3. "Good...now, what do you notice?"

4. Victim starts freaking out because they are completely under and have perfect recollection

5. "It's OK...I'm here...just tell me what you see. What do you smell?"

6. Victim says h/she sees the criminal. (I say, "Duh.")

7. "Good...good...do you see a name plate? A license?"

8. Victim shakes head vehemently

9. "It's OK...you can do this...just read the license plate..."

10. Victim: "I smell perfume! It's made from saffron and stardust and sold only on Mars!"

11. "Excellent! Keep going...keep focused...what's on the license plate?"

12. Victim: "5...R...R...I think it's a....6? I can't! I can't!"

13. "It's OK. You can leave now."

14. Victim opens eyes. Is instantly back in the present day and runs out of the room

 

Well, no matter, a partial plate/name and special detail is always remembered and is enough to crack the case. Who needs DNA or forensic science or sleuthing skill? Hypnosis - no fuss, no muss, always successful. I am going to try this in other areas of my life. "OK, boss, now let's go to my performance review...are you there? Good...."

 

This exact scenario happened on "Criminal Minds" last night.

[Kel Varnsen]

If you are a cop or some other kind of tough law enforcement/government type you can never answer your cell phone by saying "Hello". You have to say "yeah" or just state your last name.