The Lonely Js Club: James, Jackson & Johannah

[CarolMK]

According to what I remember from the very first 14 Kids special, Michelle stated that the older ones got a buddy at age 6 and that once any kid reached that age, they were assigned one. 6, I can't believe it. But anyway, I assume Josh, Jana and John all had buddies by the time Michelle had her laundry  room breakdown (when Joseph was a baby, since she said it was after # 7 was born). All of the older girls of course went on to have 2 and 3 buddies as time passed. The narrator of that series also stated that Michelle was Jim Bob's buddy (which I found sort of creepy) and then Michelle said that her baby at the time was her buddy until it was 6 months old and weaned, and then it was passed on to a buddy. Her words exactly, referring to her infant as "it". From what we saw, it looked as if the girls were doing about 95% of the childcare for the younger ones. Michelle might have been doing some homeschooling but that's about it. Jana and Jill were already also cooking for the entire family at ages 12 and 14 as well as doing all the laundry, cooking, and cleaning, the kids one by one listed their jurisdictions. Michelle struck me then as unbelievably lazy and my opinion has not changed to this day. But being the oldest daughter, Jana has had the majority of the work, with Jill a very close second at doing all of the housekeeping and childcare.

[Apple Clark]

According to what I remember from the very first 14 Kids special, Michelle stated that the older ones got a buddy at age 6 and that once any kid reached that age, they were assigned one. 6, I can't believe it. But anyway, I assume Josh, Jana and John all had buddies by the time Michelle had her laundry  room breakdown (when Joseph was a baby, since she said it was after # 7 was born). All of the older girls of course went on to have 2 and 3 buddies as time passed. The narrator of that series also stated that Michelle was Jim Bob's buddy (which I found sort of creepy) and then Michelle said that her baby at the time was her buddy until it was 6 months old and weaned, and then it was passed on to a buddy. Her words exactly, referring to her infant as "it".

No 6 year old on this planet should be in charge of a 6 month old infant. That is too much. MAYBE if watching the baby was their ONLY "jurisdiction", but school, jurisdictions, normal everyday things, and a baby, that young?! I had responsibilites as a kid, like cleaning the bathroom, and I did my own laundry when I was a teen, but handing an infant off to a child is insane. Now that I know they started the buddy system when the kids were this young, this makes me question some things a lot more. They'll trust a kid that's barely older than a toddler with an infant, but they won't trust their (ADULT) sons and daughters to date? That's bullshit. I'm furious right now. And I feel awful for Jana especially. I think she's my favorite, her and everyone in Jill's buddy group (except maybe Jill...).

P.S. What was the "laundry room breakdown" exactly?

[CarolMK]

The laundry room breakdown was discussed in their first book, not on the show ( I haven't read any of the other books). Michelle had 7 kids at the time and she was up at 1:30 am doing load after load of laundry and she broke down in tears. Then she began to pray and sang praises to the Lord. A day later, their piano teacher offered  to help Michelle do the laundry. Since Grandma Mary was nearby, I wouldn't be surprised if she used to help Michelle at that time as well. Michelle talks a good game about how she had to do everything herself, but I've read accounts where she had a lot of people from their early church helping them a great deal with chores and donating clothing and food to the family. Back to Jana, at the time of this breakdown, the kids were 7, 5, 5, 4, 2 1/2, 1 1/2 and however many months old Joseph was then. I'm very certain Jana became a buddy at only 5 years old since she was the oldest girl. The following year all of the kids were a year older, but then Josiah was a newborn (going back in time approximately 19 years from today). Having that many children at home all the time with no break and trying to homeschool them would very likely drive the average person to a nervous breakdown..I think of the Andrea Yates case in regard to this. Also, when you think about how Jessa, Jinger and then Joseph were all born in the space of 26 months, that was a great deal of added stress to Michelle's body as well as her mind. Meanwhile, Jim Bob was out towing trucks, running a car lot and probably doing other wheeling and dealing so Michelle was likely on her own a lot more then. Jana had no choice but to become a buddy, as did Josh and John David for awhile, too. 

Edited May 7, 2015 by CarolMK

[DangerousMinds]

She may feel stupid living in a dorm, but I would rather feel stupid for a few years living in a dorm and get an education than feel stupid living in a dorm and get no education. Of course, it's still her choice and her life, but I wish she'd do an online college or something if she can't leave her kids. She's only stuck (IMO) because she's scared. I would be too though.

Better that than the dorm room she lives and sleeps in now with toddlers on up.

[NikSac]

No 6 year old on this planet should be in charge of a 6 month old infant. That is too much. MAYBE if watching the baby was their ONLY "jurisdiction", but school, jurisdictions, normal everyday things, and a baby, that young?!

 

Exactly! Even a 6 year old I might trust or ask to watch a baby while I went to pee real quick or something, but expecting that 6 year old to know full on child-care and CPR etc. just really bothers me. I feel so awful for Jana because now that Jill and Jessa are gone, I think she's stuck with all the responsibility that the older girls have had for years, including caring for most of the younger kids.

[becca3891]

 

Having that many children at home all the time with no break and trying to homeschool them would very likely drive the average person to a nervous breakdown..I think of the Andrea Yates case in regard to this.

Poor Andrea Yates had postpartum psychosis, too. But for years before that kicked in, she was surely miserable. I've read horrifying things about her pastor and the misogynistic things he would say about women.

 

It does make me wonder, actually, if people could be right that Michelle is on medication. The odds are against having that many pregnancies and never experiencing postpartum depression.

[GEML]

I don't think Jim Bob would deny her medication. (Andrea Yates' husband certainly didn't) but I can see Michelle refusing to take it if it increased risks in pregnancies and Jim Bob not saying it would be better to take it and postpone having children. Also, in Andrea Yates' case, what worked after one pregnancy didn't work again after a subsequent one, as the body changes so frantically, so simply saying, "I can always go back on medication" isn't simple.

So I don't think Michelle took medication of any kind during her childbearing years. These are people who are convinced that the pill caused their first miscarriage. They wouldn't risk anything that would cause harm to the pregnancy, Michelle's well being notwithstanding.

Edited May 7, 2015 by GEML

[SunnyBeBe]

I was glad to see Marjorie actually playing notes on the piano.  The Erin Bates' style is to play chords very loudly.  To me, it  seems that the loud/chord style is supposed to somehow translate into the listener being impressed and misled to believe the player is doing something very complicated on the piano. I'm not sure if Erin knows that.  I recall the people at the college she visited once with the Duggar girls looked appalled when they heard her audition.  I think they were speechless.  I wonder if they were truthful with her.   

 

Marsiah seem to be very sweet, but so helpless in the whole matter.  

[GEML]

If fairness to Erin, her style of playing is a form of string instrument playing that goes back to Scotland. And if you think it's easy, just try doing it. It requires and incredible ear and excellent understanding of human voice and timing. Even people well trained in classical music can't duplicate it.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

I wonder if they play the piano like an organ, all chords and heavy handed.  

[GEML]

As someone who comes from a family where the mother plays the piano like Erin and a husband who plays the organ, I can say they are actually completely different and the training is different.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

As someone who comes from a family where the mother plays the piano like Erin and a husband who plays the organ, I can say they are actually completely different and the training is different.

I suggested the possibility because my grandparents had both an organ and a piano in our living room and banged them both the same way!  LOL  Instrument training style going back to Scotland?!  UM NO.  They learned how to read musical notes then practiced.  They also played in our church and banged to be heard!  

[Wellfleet]

If fairness to Erin, her style of playing is a form of string instrument playing that goes back to Scotland. And if you think it's easy, just try doing it. It requires and incredible ear and excellent understanding of human voice and timing. Even people well trained in classical music can't duplicate it.

 

I'm sure it's not easy to do. And glad it's difficult to duplicate, because as far as listening to it goes, it's quite unpleasant. Any more than a 2-3 minute "The Wedding March" would be intolerable, at least IMO. I can't imagine there are lines outside the box office for tickets to "An Evening of Loud Banging..."

[BitterApple]

Erin's wedding march sounded like background music for an execution at The Tower of London. Hopefully Si and Marjorie opt for a harp or a nice string quartet.

[Literata]

 

Marsiah seem to be very sweet, but so helpless in the whole matter.

...and that would be because they're 12. Not to be flippant, but in any other universe but the Duggars', these kids have no business "purposing" to prepare to marry.

 

I've always liked Josiah and have had a soft spot in my heart for him ever since Boob did whatever he did to him during the pregnancy announcement long ago. I love the fact that he's personable and outgoing and dresses nicely and seems to have half a brain, and it makes me sad to know that he's not likely to live up to his potential in the real world. The fact that Boob and MEchelle seem to be hell-bent on sucking all the individuality out of these kids is especially sad in this case.

 

I get that the only way for a Duggar to get out of the house is to marry, so from that standpoint, I'm happy for Josiah. But what a spot to be in. He's the one I'd really like to rescue. For starters, I'd set him up with community-college classes, a dermatologist, and a part-time job at Abercrombie, and I'm sure he'd thrive. But sadly, he's likely to have four kids by the age of 22 and end up wondering what the hell happened to his hopes and dreams.

[Seashell Lover]

I think on her 18th birthday they will get engaged.

[Sew Sumi]

I think she just turned 17 a couple of months ago (Feb/March). I hope they wait at LEAST that long. But given that she was at Derick's birthday party at Jill's place in early March leads me to believe they've been courting longer than they're letting on. No other family "friends" were at this party; it was strictly direct-line Duggars and Dillards....and Marjorie. I have a feeling they started courting when she turned 17, not long after Josiah returned from his 3-week trip to the Philippines in February. 

[Almost 3000]

Erin's wedding march sounded like background music for an execution at The Tower of London. Hopefully Si and Marjorie opt for a harp or a nice string quartet.

It would be nice to hear three (or whatever # but 3 sounds good for a start) of the older Duggar girls playing their harps at a wedding and participating in that way. And a bonus would be possibly avoiding pregnant bridesmaids in stretchy, cheap, junior fashion dresses. Nike.

[JoanArc]

 

I think she just turned 17 a couple of months ago

OUCH. So she started seeing Josiah most likely when she was 16? She's basically locked-in to getting married. This whole relationship just burns me up.

[ranchgirl]

Purely speculation on my part, but I wonder if Jana had her eye and hopes on a certain guy and she prayed hard that he would notice her or like her too, but the guy never noticed her or came around to try and get to know her so nothing materialized/    Maybe the guy even went on to court and marry one of her fundie friends.  Perhaps that is what pushed Jana to be so sad and not want to invest in another relationship.  

[NikSac]

Purely speculation on my part, but I wonder if Jana had her eye and hopes on a certain guy and she prayed hard that he would notice her or like her too, but the guy never noticed her or came around to try and get to know her so nothing materialized/    Maybe the guy even went on to court and marry one of her fundie friends.  Perhaps that is what pushed Jana to be so sad and not want to invest in another relationship.  

 

Aww. That even made me sad! You might well be right. Maybe she's already given up pieces of her heart.

[zenme]

Or Daddy said "no."

[BitterApple]

Someone has to be the sacrificial lamb and it looks like that prize is going to Jana. Michelle and Boob travel all the time, Grandma is too old to run the show, Joy Anna is too young and Jinger has zero fucks to give. Joe is at Clown College, JD works, Josiah is now courting. Jana is stuck by default.

[Fuzzysox]

So maybe Marsiah will take over the littles when Jana is finally let free.

[Readalot]

I think she just turned 17 a couple of months ago (Feb/March). I hope they wait at LEAST that long. But given that she was at Derick's birthday party at Jill's place in early March leads me to believe they've been courting longer than they're letting on. No other family "friends" were at this party; it was strictly direct-line Duggars and Dillards....and Marjorie. I have a feeling they started courting when she turned 17, not long after Josiah returned from his 3-week trip to the Philippines in February.

our oldest turned 17 in March too. There is no way in hell I could picture her getting ready for marriage. She is an athlete scholar, involved in her community really a great kid. BUT SHE IS A KID. Not even close to bring mature enough to decide about a life long commitment. I'm sad for Marjorie.

[cmr2014]

 

And of course the home school conferences are always good for boyfriend/girlfriend shopping.  That's where Josh found Anns I believe.  Jana and John David seem too shy and awkward respectively to do that kind of shopping around.  They desperately need interaction with the opposite sex in relaxed situations.  They need a level of comfort, and I don't know where they could find it.  The conferences at their ages are not doing it for them.  I'm not happy with snarking on J.D. because he is seeming so lost and unhappy lately.  Nothing to say, hard to get him to even smile like he used to.  Sad, very sad.

 

I agree. I've actually begun to think that JD is not the worst that a Gothard girl could do. He is a very passive low-key guy. I would bet that if his wife wanted to go to school, or work, or wear pants, or have two kids, he wouldn't say boo. Unlike some Gothard guys (TFDW comes to mind) I don't think he is rigid and controlling. He has shown some abilities which will make it possible for him to make a living after the TLC gravy train comes to a halt (he owns a house, has some knowledge of construction, he has a constable gig that could help him get a paying job in law enforcement in the future, etc.). Also, unlike virtually all of the other Duggars, he has shown enough passion and perseverance to actually accomplish something not directly related to religion and/or Gothardism (his pilot's license).

 

He's not very good looking, and he has the sense of humor of a middle schooler, and I think he will probably end up marrying someone sort of second tier -- like and older woman with kids who was divorced before turning to Gothardism.

 

Jana, on the other hand, has some similar personality traits that make her really vulnerable. The fact that she is shy and passive could make her really appealing to a control freak. I don't think she wants a large family of her own -- I don't think she wants the responsibility -- and I don't know how she could ever admit that to anyone. 

 

She's pretty, but that's about all we know about her.

[Neet]

He's not very good looking, and he has the sense of humor of a middle schooler, and I think he will probably end up marrying someone sort of second tier -- like and older woman with kids who was divorced before turning to Gothardism.

 

Hopefully JD's passivity has a limit that would at least enable him to say no to raising another man's kids. He deserves a family of his own.

[riverblue22]

In the real world Marjorie would be his first girl friend and they would probably not last.  But in this world, they are already glued together, and any breakup would mean failure and embarrassment for both families.  I feel for these kids.

[kalamac]

If you marry someone with kids, they do become your own family, even if they are still in contact with their other biological parent. Accepting children who are not biologically yours into your heart and family is a loving, selfless thing to do, and makes you just as much a parent as inseminating someone yourself.

Still with the Gothard views on adoption, I'm not sure JD would be allowed to become part of pre-existing family, as I would think it would be considered similar.

Edited May 8, 2015 by kalamac

[cmr2014]

You are probably right. I can't really imagine the scenario where a man would be bad enough that it would be okay for the woman to be divorced, but not so bad that "the sins of the father" wouldn't be an issue for a step-father (in Gothard-land).

 

I would also say, that I'm not a big JD fan, and I don't think he would be a great father, or husband -- just better than a lot of other Gothard boys. I think that JD, like most of the Duggars, is completely lacking in empathy.

 

I think that most of these Gothard boys are going to have real problems -- no education, and no skills. They are expected to have their own businesses whether they are suited for that role or not. They are expected to support large families, etc. I think that in that world, JD is a bit of a catch -- which makes it all the more obvious why Jana might be reluctant to jump out of the money ship and into some leaky boat.

[SpaghettiTuesdays]

After watching the Special Delivery episode, I'm convinced a large reason Jana stays is because she feels she has to. She may not like it, but the thought of her leaving the little ones to essentially fend for themselves might be too difficult. Or maybe I'm projecting. :(

 

When the clan went to help with Iz's nursery, there was a shot of the family greeting the Dillards in the living room. Jana had a fake smile on her face and then when there was work to be done, she glanced to her right, looked down, and quickly walked away. Hmm...

[RedheadZombie]

If Jana's problem is being shy and awkward around males, and I'm not saying it is, it may be improved by being around Ben and Derick.  Just having frequent interactions with a non-blood related male could make her more comfortable.  I can't believe she's shyer than Michael Bates, whose own family openly discusses her difficulty in courting - God can you imagine how much more awkward you feel with the world being informed of this?  But then the Bates seem to learn and adjust with each child courting, unlike the Duggars.

[JenCarroll]

our oldest turned 17 in March too. There is no way in hell I could picture her getting ready for marriage. She is an athlete scholar, involved in her community really a great kid. BUT SHE IS A KID. Not even close to bring mature enough to decide about a life long commitment. I'm sad for Marjorie.

My oldest turned 20 in March, and I still can't see it. But she was raised with the full expectation that she'd go to college at the very least. So it would be weird for her, and all her friends would think it was weird, if she suddenly decided she's ready to marry. In Marjorie's world, apparently everyone does think this is a good age to get married and it seems relatively normal.

Still my spidey senses are tingling that there's something about this courtship that Jim Bob doesn't approve of (which, obviously, is a point in its favor). I hold out hope that maybe the two of them will go to college together.

[GEML]

Well, I'll play devil's advocate and say that Marjorie is pretty accomplished for a 17 year old. She's already a better writer than most adults, and doing the lecture circuit. I was only a year older than she was when I was engaged, and my husband was about her age exactly. He graduated high school at 16, and he had already done a full year of college credit, by then anyway.

Some people really are pretty mature at a young age. I don't think the Duggar children are, but some people really can pull it off. Maybe Marjorie is one of them. I honestly don't feel sorry for her. I think she wants this and unlike the other people who have married into the Duggar circus actually knows what she is getting into and is looking forward to it.

[Wellfleet]

Well, I'll play devil's advocate and say that Marjorie is pretty accomplished for a 17 year old. She's already a better writer than most adults, and doing the lecture circuit. I was only a year older than she was when I was engaged, and my husband was about her age exactly. He graduated high school at 16, and he had already done a full year of college credit, by then anyway.

Some people really are pretty mature at a young age. I don't think the Duggar children are, but some people really can pull it off. Maybe Marjorie is one of them. I honestly don't feel sorry for her. I think she wants this and unlike the other people who have married into the Duggar circus actually knows what she is getting into and is looking forward to it.

 

I'm sure Marjorie wants this too - no doubt about that. When I was 17, I knew exactly what my life was going to be like too. I'm sure she's sure everything will work out wonderfully. I'm sure she thinks she knows exactly what she's doing. And maybe she is. But she's 17, Josiah's 18. They don't know what they don't know yet, and the odds are overwhelmingly against them. Sure, occasionally it works out for a couple who marry that young, but not usually. And it works even less often when teen couples start having children right away.

Edited May 10, 2015 by Wellfleet

[Apple Clark]

I think Jana is just shy and awkward period. It might be worse around guys because she was never allowed to be around them alone though. That's another thing that makes me angry with JBoob and Mechelle. They think that if you are even remotely involved with someone of the opposite gender it has to be for courting, not just friends.

[RazzleberryPie]

I think Jana is just shy and awkward period. It might be worse around guys because she was never allowed to be around them alone though. That's another thing that makes me angry with JBoob and Mechelle. They think that if you are even remotely involved with someone of the opposite gender it has to be for courting, not just friends.

There's a mindset with these type of people, that often makes everyone terrified of sex and relationships. For men, all women are potential temptresses out to wile and trick them. First time the guys realize a woman isn't perfect or has a better idea than them, it's because Eve (not Satan) tricked Adam with that apple, and needs put in here place. For women, all men are out to take our virtue and if you're not being protected by your father or brothers, you're fair game to be ravished. Men are never kind to you unless they desire you, and they never offer any politeness unless they expect something in return. Also, if you say hello to someone of the opposite sex, you're enticing them or giving away pieces of your heart.

 

Jana is the eldest girl, so she really didn't have any examples to follow in regards to relationships and courtships, so if she's naturally introverted and shy, the has all these expectations and paranoia shoved upon her - oh, and add in all the drilling into their heads that girls are supposed to sit and wait for prince charming, but NEVER show initiative or introduce themselves to a guy, and most of these fundie guys are either introverted doofuses/doofi (what's the plural of doofus?) or abusing scripture to keep the Wimmin in their places - no wonder she's not married. 

 

They have a limit circle of eligible men, and then out of those few guys, most of them are weird, bullies, dorks, relatives, etc., but you can't even get to know one without committing to a courtship. It sucks to be a girl with a personality (not that Jana appears to have one), a brain, or any ambition past having tons of babies and staring adoringly at your husband. If Josh Duggar is the jackpot, then geez, that's some slim pickings.

[DangerousMinds]

Doofi. LMAO!

[Apple Clark]

Maybe it's just because she's my favorite J'Slave, but I like to think that she is purposely not in the show much, and hides her personality because she's fed up with all of it. It's more likely that she doesn't have much of a personality because of how she was raised, being a mom basically at age 5, not getting much attention or an education, not being able to develop interests on her own, ect, and that's why she is what she is today. A shy, introverted, passive, pitiable woman.

'Doofi' had me cracking up.

[Wellfleet]

Of course being a teacher I had to look this up, so my first surprise was that doofus is in the dictionary on my Mac laptop. Oh, and the plural of doofus is actually doofuses. But I think I like doofi better myself - LOL.

Edited May 9, 2015 by Wellfleet

[BitterApple]

I like doofi better as well.

I think Jana needs to figure out a way to hang out with the Bateses more. They seem to be doing well in the spouse department. If she could find a John Webster type that wants little to do with her family and moves her a thousand miles away, she'd be golden.

[Fuzzysox]

Kelly Bates seems to have a gift when it comes to fundie matchmaking.

 

Jana indeed needs to hang out with her and she just might land a good man. Unlike MEChelle Kelly has a heart for her children and takes an interest in their lives.

[Hpmec]

Doofi is hysterical, but what I enjoyed even more in your post, Razzleberry Pie, was your catagorizing the eligible fundie males as "weird, bullies, dorks," and "relatives." You nailed it. Jana probably looks around and thinks, "As awful as raising my siblings is, marrying some nutcase and bearing his numerous offspring would be 10 times worse." When the already taken field includes such gems as TFDW and Bin Seewald, the pickins are beyond slim and staying single probably looks pretty attractive.

Jana's problem isn't that she's unmarried and unattached at 25. It's that she's trapped in a no win situation. Stay home be a slave and be miserable or marry some Boob approved lackey and be miserable. I wouldn't wish Jana's life on anybody.

[BitterApple]

Don't forget John Shrader, he's another gem.

There's plenty of Conservative Christian and more mainstream Christian guys out there who would love to meet Jana. She'd be well served to get out of the mindset of finding a spouse within Gothard circles.

[MamaMax]

Jana may be waiting on purpose. I agree that she may not want to abandon the younger kids, but also, she may not want a zillion kids…so the older you are when you marry, the fewer kids you will have. Seriously, delay marriage by 5-10 years, that could be like EIGHT LESS KIDS.  Jana may be very afraid that she will be as fertile as Michelle and the speed with which her sisters have been knocked up would heighten that fear if it exists. If Jana wants to wait around and marry "late" at 30 (shocking!), then good on her.

[Hpmec]

It would be great if Jana could eventually find someone more mainstream, but then he would have to be another Derick - approved by Boob and willing to go along with all the arcane courtship rules -side hugs, chaperones, etc. Boob is way too controlling to ever let one of his daughters become involved with someone who wasn't willing to toe the party line and become Duggarized. His comment that Derick had become a Duggar says it all. The main prerequisite for a Duggar son-in-law besides "Godliness" is willingness to obey Boob's dictates. Thus far he's batting 1000.

[JenCarroll]

I'm sure Marjorie wants this too - no doubt about that. When I was 17, I knew exactly what my life was going to be like too. I'm sure she's sure everything will work out wonderfully. I'm sure she thinks she knows exactly what she's doing. And maybe she is. But she's 17, Josiah's 18. They don't know what they don't know yet, and the odds are overwhelmingly against them. Sure, occasionally it works out for a couple who marry that young, but not usually. And it works even less often when teen couples start having children right away.

Time will tell. I'm surprised that I'm honestly more interested in this courtship than I was in either of the girls' -- maybe I just find Josiah and Marjorie more interesting as people (which wouldn't take much). We haven't even really started seeing it yet, but I'm intrigued. I hope they get a lot of air time next season.

[Neet]

If you marry someone with kids, they do become your own family, even if they are still in contact with their other biological parent. Accepting children who are not biologically yours into your heart and family is a loving, selfless thing to do, and makes you just as much a parent as inseminating someone yourself.

Still with the Gothard views on adoption, I'm not sure JD would be allowed to become part of pre-existing family, as I would think it would be considered similar.

There's still a difference, and I doubt any guy would choose to be a stepdad over a real one. Since women are pretty much in full control of pregnancy, they likely don't understand guys' point of view about raising someone else's children. It's not a huge deal if you're still in the dating scene at 40, but JD's first and only (permanent, too) relationship starting off with kids who aren't his would probably suck and I'd feel pathetic and used in that position. Not trying to change anyone's opinions, but that's mine. Considering that most of Gothard/Christian/etc.. frowns on divorce, it's not likely to happen anyway.

Back on topic, I've been starting to wonder lately if it's possible that Jana's been overrated for the past few years. I'm definitely not the only one, since it's repeatedly said she doesn't show much of a personality, but she doesn't speak up at all. Are people just assuming that she's so smart and awesome? For all we know, she could be dim and boring. Sure, Jana takes care of the kids, although I think she does it partially because she's forced, not necessarily because she's that maternal and caring. Sometimes I will agree with the "for God's sake, let Jana move out and live already" mentality, then other times, all I can see is a 25 year old girl who doesn't speak or show any emotion, hiding in the corner of the room, and think there's a bunch of positive attributes being projected onto her. JD is similar, IMO, except for taking care of the younger kids. They're both really bland to me and I don't see how Jana stands out, although I would like to be proven wrong.

[BitterApple]

I think if JD were living in the real world marrying a divorcee or a widow with kids would be no big deal, but I don't think Boob would go for it in a million years.

As for Jana, it's likely hard for her to socialize in big groups and unfortunately mass gatherings such as weddings and homeschool conferences are the only places to meet a potential mate. Although many on here have speculated that Boob may have originally intended to hook Derick up with Jana and she turned him down.

[BitterApple]

It's hard for me to get a handle on their courtship because we've only seen brief snippets of them together. I still think they're way too young to get married, but they seem well suited to one another thus far. Time will tell.