S05.E03: Spurgeon's First Birthday

[bigskygirl]

Quote

Spurgeon's first birthday brings the family together for a celebration. Meanwhile, Joy and Austin work on a house-flipping project; and in Laredo, things heat up in the kitchen with Jinger and Jeremy.

[Jeeves]

As I just posted over in the "Duggars in the Media and TLC" topic - don't blink or you'll miss it. TLC's showing this episode only once. It will be followed by the hour-long speshul show about Cousin Amy and Whatshisname. Which also will be shown only once. JB's head must be exploding: Amy and Whatshisname are getting as much airtime tonight as himself and his Godly Blessed Speshul Loinfruit. 

Edited June 19, 2017 by Jeeves

[truthtalk2014]

WTF?  Why did these women have to bring all their children to a consignment sale?  It's not like any of their husbands have a job.  Such an insane storyline.  Anna is a complete idiot.  Everything she does and says makes me want to barf.  She is so in awe of midwife Jill.  OMG!  And I'm only halfway through this show!  Just had to vent. 

[Annb67]

Hold up. Why in the hell is Joy in charge of Spurgeons first damn birthday? Don't tell me Jesus is too busy. Most parents can't wait to plan a child's first birthday. Also, Anna is on Xanax or something. While Jill was droning on about whatever, Anna's eyes were literally closing mid sentence.

1 minute ago, truthtalk2014 said:

WTF?  Why did these women have to bring all their children to a consignment sale?  It's not like any of their husbands have a job.  Such an insane storyline.  Anna is a complete idiot.  Everything she does and says makes me want to barf.  She is so in awe of midwife Jill.  OMG!  And I'm only halfway through this show!  Just had to vent. 

Well you know Jill was a first responder. Bullshit!

[humbleopinion]

The Duggars hold their coffee cups in their IGs more tenderly than their own children.

Cut Anna's medication dosage to half and get her some coffee and don't forget the sleeve so we know it if from a coffee shop and not Folgers Instant.

Edited June 20, 2017 by humbleopinion

[Chicklet]

Good grief, during a 60 minute show we have been treated to not one but TWO grocery shopping trips. But both were adequately nuts so there's that. Then the "Consignment Tragedy". 

And now we know that everyone but Joy and the little kids sits around on their butts all day.

Josie seems nice.

All the kids have black feet. 

[VioletNevermind]

OMG, watching these kids atttempt to talk their way through a simple math concept is hilarious.  Bin looked like he could barely comprehend the question, bless his heart.

[Annb67]

It's official. They are all bumbling idiots with a collective IQ of -1,500. I've never seen such stupid people. They seem extra moronic this evening. 

[woodscommaelle]

If you're ever playing trivia and the question is 'Who is the dumbest Duggar girl?'  The answer is Joy. 

Anna looks nice with the darker hair.  I don't know if I can't stand her or feel just so terribly sorry for her.

As Jill likes to say, Jessa is actually kind of chill. I don't mind her these days.

Why does Josie's hair always looks wet?  Perhaps it's grease from lack of washing?  Gross.  Girl was super effing bitchy during that one scene with one of the other young sisters and a balloon. 

Edited June 20, 2017 by woodscommaelle

[Annb67]

Oh Ben. When Spurge wakes up and says "cracker" he isn't asking for a cracker. He's calling you a cracker. 

[TigerLily20]

we need a gif of Jessa saying "Balls" with that face......my husband busted up at that point....

[Chicklet]

Spurgeon is the smartest person in that family probably. And where was Anna for his party? Was she uninvinted due to her slimebag spouse?

[ozziemom]

Jesse and Jill have the fakest laugh, hard to tell who is the worst, ugh. Also why are they asking Jinger about a baby? In real time isn't this just a few weeks from the wedding?

[Annb67]

7 minutes ago, TigerLily20 said:

we need a gif of Jessa saying "Balls" with that face......my husband busted up at that point....

Spurgeon's favorite thing are balls...as most boys Jessa, as with most boys.

[humbleopinion]

 IZ is the smartest in the clan...

He will exact revenge on each and every one of his family who failed him and allowed his parents to treat him cruelly.

[Adeejay]

I wish Anna would please stop saying that Jill is a midwife, because she is not certified.  “The kids are tired.  I know that neither Izzy or Spurge has had a nap.”  Perhaps someone should tell Jessa it’s either/or and neither/nor.  In her THs, she seems to think she is being cute and charming when she laughs; however, having seen her as the bossy, humorless, sour puss that she really is, I can’t help but see her as fake and phony.

Jinger doesn’t have a job, so I find it interesting that she couldn’t make time to attend Spurge’s first birthday party.

[woodscommaelle]

Fat, plump and happy. Is there any better way ??

Um, that bouncy house did not look properly inflated. It looked dangerous actually.

Edited June 20, 2017 by woodscommaelle

[auntieminem]

From the way Jeremy and Jinger answered the where do you see yourself in a year, in five years, sounds like they (or least he) are not wanting kids for a while.  Could it be they may actually plan their family and use birth control?   

[woodscommaelle]

54 minutes ago, Annb67 said:

Hold up. Why in the hell is Joy in charge of Spurgeons first damn birthday? Don't tell me Jesus is too busy. 

Is that a typo? Super fucking funny! 

[Maya]

Do most people put mozzarella cheese on fajitas? Do people shred real mozzarella? I have only seen it sliced. So many questions about that enormous block of cheese and what Babe was planning to do with it. 

[woodscommaelle]

10 hours ago, Chicklet said:

Then the "Consignment Tragedy".

#neverforget

Edited June 20, 2017 by woodscommaelle

[humbleopinion]

Jinge/Pastor could have answered that in five years they will still be eating off that block of mozzarella

[flyingdi]

I am also totally clueless as to why someone would only buy one Apple and I grew up in a family of two kids.

[truthtalk2014]

Did anyone notice what a little bossy B Miracle was and the way she talked to poor Jordyn?  Jordyn just took it. She was just trying to help decorate the stupid chair.  I'm sure she is used to it.  Jordyn is Cinderella.  

[humbleopinion]

Jordyn is the new Jana?

[Maya]

14 minutes ago, flyingdi said:

I am also totally clueless as to why someone would only buy one Apple and I grew up in a family of two kids.

Maybe it gives Jinger something to do each day. "Babe, I'm off to buy more apples!"

[yogi2014L]

When Marcus fell in the store, why on earth couldn't jill take Isreal with them? I get that anna was freaking but man if I was Jessa I woulda been like take at least one baby LOL. 

I sadly enjoy the Laredo scenes.  I like Jinger and Jeremys scenes

[ThinkerBell]

I was appalled when Jill decided that math is too hard, and said she'd have to get Derrick to figure our how many Duggar birthdays they've collectively celebrated. 

Please tell me they had a backup cake after Spugeon puked on the first one. 

[humbleopinion]

I applaud Jinge for buying one apple at a time...it must be revolutionary for her to only think in terms on ONE of anything at the grocery store...

[Annb67]

35 minutes ago, woodscommaelle said:

Is that a typo? Super fucking funny! 

Ha!!! Yes it was. Jessa=Jesus??

46 minutes ago, woodscommaelle said:

Fat, plump and happy. Is there any better way ??

Um, that bouncy house did not look properly inflated. It looked dangerous actually.

I have seen those. They are for TODDLERS dumbass Duggars. Not for a party of 18,000 kids who are 12 and over. I swear, dumbfucks, all of them.

[ThinkerBell]

26 minutes ago, flyingdi said:

I am also totally clueless as to why someone would only buy one Apple and I grew up in a family of two kids.

Maybe Jinge and Jeremy are doing a Garden of Eden re-enactment.

[Marigold]

3 minutes ago, ThinkerBell said:

Maybe Jinge and Jeremy are doing a Garden of Eden re-enactment.

Could be kinda hot...I bet Jeremy likes lots of things.  ;)

[Annb67]

So if Joy is taking over Jinger's jobs of laundry, cooking, cleaning, party planning, decorating, organizing, grocery shopping etc., I have but one question. Michelle, WTF is your ass doing all day long? Oh and boys, if there is so much more dirty laundry now here's something new DO IT YOURSELF!!!

[Sew Sumi]

14 minutes ago, ThinkerBell said:

Maybe Jinge and Jeremy are doing a Garden of Eden re-enactment.

Fundie kink? 

[Marigold]

2 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Fundie kink? 

Jinger is thumbing through the Fund sex toy catalog as we snark. (yeah, that's a real thing)

[Gemma Violet]

1 hour ago, auntieminem said:

From the way Jeremy and Jinger answered the where do you see yourself in a year, in five years, sounds like they (or least he) are not wanting kids for a while.  Could it be they may actually plan their family and use birth control?   

I was very encouraged by this.  Yay for them.  Maybe they'll be the first Duggar couple to actually get to know each other before having kids.

[Tdoc72]

1 Apple and 100lbs of mozzarella doesn't seem like the wisest of choices. Are there no supermarkets in Laredo?  Do they shop 1 day at a time (except for the cheese)?

I could see Jessa asking for help w/the party since she is heavily pregnant but it seemed like she did nothing at all but show up.  Spurg's new chair was cute, but do they even have space in their little house?  Jessa did mention getting a bigger place. I wondered if her and Ben will buy it or if daddy jimbob will?  LOL--who am I kidding?  Jimbob of course. 

8 minutes ago, Gemma Violet said:

I was very encouraged by this.  Yay for them.  Maybe they'll be the first Duggar couple to actually get to know each other before having kids.

I thought that too. Pants and the pill???

Also weird that Amy mentioned not using birth control but said they still wanted to wait. Dillon better wrap it up if he doesn't want an 'oopsie'!

[Tdoc72]

I started a new thread for Amy & Dillon's special. 

Its under 19 Kids and Counting, then under Duggar specials. 

 

Snark away!

[Sew Sumi]

What kind of sale was that? No one else was there. Methinks that production got the store to shut the place down and let the Duggars rampage through it for half an hour or so. As long as a certain amount of money was spent, I'm sure the store was okay with that. I don't recall if they showed the store's name or not, but if so, good promotion for the shop as well. 

[Texasmom1970]

I am babe overload. Someone really should count and see how many times they say id during an episode.

Still think Spurgeon is so adorable.

Jing watching babe workout. Thought the film crew was gonna have to turn the hose on her.

[BitterApple]

When they were at Jessa's house, I noticed both Jill and Jessa seemed really annoyed with the rambunctious Mkids. Now we know why Anna and Co. never get invited anywhere. 

Joy and Austin are growing on me. I'm not a huge fan of Mr. Forsyth but liked that he stressed the point of having finances together before considering marriage. Poor Jana, though. That must truly suck watching your sister marry the DIY husband you've been dreaming about for a decade.

Jinger and Jeremy are cute together and seem really happy. I have to say though, I'd go bonkers being stuck in that tiny apartment all day. I don't know why it's such a sin for Jinger to get a part time job, especially if they aren't planning on kids for a while.

I wanted to drop kick all those Duggar boys when they talked about the housework and laundry piling up. They're such lazy, smug assholes.

Spurgeon rejecting the cake was awesome. Maybe he sensed it was teaming with germs and loose hair and he didn't want food poisoning. Smart boy, Spurgie. You and Grumpy Wilberforce may be the ones to break the cycle of idiocy.

[Fostersmom]

Jinger still had her honeymoon sex hair going on in the few shots of them. I can get how the idea of buying 1 apple would be a foreign concept to her since a) how many apples did she ever get growing up, and b) the few apples she got came from a bag of 20. Jeremy's idea of fresh mozzarella is not so much as fresh as it is deli block. 

Have they explained the sudden appearance of Tyler to the audience? If you only knew them from the show, I'd imagine you'd be wondering who he was or why he was there. 

I liked Ben's mom and I don't remember liking her before. Was she wearing pants? Why do I remember Ben's family being more fundy when they were courting? 

Joy is an odd combination of Jessa and Michelle. You can tell she gets shit done, but uses Michelle's baby voice to do it. They kept talking about all the things Joy was in charge of now that Jessa and Jinger left, but what exactly does Jana do? We know Michelle is in charge of nothing, but other than cooking, it seems like Joy was in charge of everything. No wonder she got married the moment she could. 

Edited June 20, 2017 by Fostersmom

[Jellybeans]

9 hours ago, flyingdi said:

I am also totally clueless as to why someone would only buy one Apple and I grew up in a family of two kids.

I buy one apple, one orange, one kiwi, one banana every week.  LOL.  Fruit salad- add poppyseed dressing!

[luvbadtv]

Austin has to "let" Joy wear pants when they get married, right?  It really can't be modest re-modeling houses in that damn skirt.

I'd love to see a show with Jill, Jessa, Jana, and Joy gossiping about Jinjer and her pants and lack of babies.  You know they talk.

[sigmaforce86]

7 hours ago, Texasmom1970 said:

I am babe overload. Someone really should count and see how many times they say id during an episode.

Still think Spurgeon is so adorable.

Jing watching babe workout. Thought the film crew was gonna have to turn the hose on her.

Every now and then a piece of true reality sneaks in and Jinger staring at Babe was definitely one of those moments.  Good for her, if she made it through the honeymoon and into married life with a guy she didn't really "know" (considering all the stuff they didn't get to to learn about each other) and had never kissed and she can look at Babe like that; she's doing it right and maybe she's even happy.  Plus she's wearing pants now, they seem to be looking at actual family planning and pacing themselves since the 1 year plan doesn't sound like it includes a house so they're not jumping into anything before they're ready.............seriously, good for them.

I never realized how short Joy is compared to the rest of the family until she was shopping and you could see the younger kids were pretty much the same height as her.

Josh's banishment really made the accident awkward - Anna returns with a kid that just smacked his head and got stitches and the concerned father is conspicuously absent not because he doesn't care about his son (we assume) but because he can't be shown...........awkward.  

Josie's feet as she ran down the hall - pure black on the bottom.  After the talk about Joy's feet last week I sense a new drinking game coming on.

The rest is just typical Duggar stuff.  Yes I'd need pen and paper to figure out the number of birthdays but I could do it, I doubt some of them <jill> could manage it at all.  And the talk about re-arranging house duties to fill Jinger's spot - not one mention of what Michelle does and heaven forbid the menfolk chip in on laundry or cooking (what do the teen boys DO all day?) but it does highlight why Jana the family nanny might still be single and un-courted, if she's not careful she'll end up living in Grandma Duggars side of the house with JB and Michelle one day while either Jill or Jessa (my bet is on Jessa) takes over the "big house" with their growing brood.

[amitville]

9 hours ago, Marigold said:

Jinger is thumbing through the Fund sex toy catalog as we snark. (yeah, that's a real thing)

Your kidding there is a fundy sex toy catalog.  

[penbrat]

I can't help it.  I like Jess and Jinger.  Yes, there I have said it.  The rest of them, not so much, but these two do not bug or irritate me.

[Jeeves]

23 minutes ago, penbrat said:

I can't help it.  I like Jess and Jinger.  Yes, there I have said it.  The rest of them, not so much, but these two do not bug or irritate me.

I just found this episode On Demand and watched it, with liberal use of the FF key. And as much as I dislike pretty much everyone in this family, I have to agree. I found myself reacting favorably to Jessa and Jinger. In the past, Jessa's grated on me, but the editing did her some favors this time. 

But I gotta tell ya, I think the TLC Powers That Be are just really over the Duggars:

• They scheduled this *new* episode for only *one* showing last night, followed by the "Amy Duggar and Whatshisname Have Been Married For a Year" show which I wouldn't waste a minute of my life watching. And both those Duggar shows were preceded and followed by totally unrelated (see what I did there?) programming. Repeats of "Long Lost Family," actually. I could be wrong, but I don't think that's how TLC shows its love for its in-production shows. Usually new episodes are immediately preceded by the prior week's episode of the same show, and usually the network airs a premiere episode twice during the evening, so the feeds will work better for viewers across the four main US time zones. 
• The On Demand episode I watched this morning, was just like if I'd DVR'd it. It started with a minute of the end of the prior show, and *cut off* before the end of the episode. Well, Jim Blob was onscreen at the time so that was OK. 

So, TLC dumped the new episode out there for a one-off airing, then stuck a sloppy truncated version of it up On Demand. Can it be true? Is TLC finally out of fecks to give about the Duggars?

BTW, on another thread someone reported they tried to see the episode On Demand and Comcast wanted them to pay $1.99 which they wouldn't do. I didn't have to pay - and I wouldn't have - probably a difference in plans or something. But yeah, paying ten cents would be too much to pay to watch that boring mess.

Edited to add random comment: I was interested to see Jessa talking about how she misses Jinger. Did she say the same kind of things about missing Jill during the Dullard's missioncations?

Edited June 20, 2017 by Jeeves

[LilJen]

27 minutes ago, penbrat said:

I can't help it.  I like Jess and Jinger.  Yes, there I have said it.  The rest of them, not so much, but these two do not bug or irritate me.

It's a high bar for liking a Duggar: They "do not bug or irritate me." :)

[VioletNevermind]

Does anyone else think that Jinger would have attended Spurgeon's first birthday party if not for Babe?  I think he nixed the idea (part of his "no family for six months" decree) and Jinger had no choice but to go along with it.  Wild horses could not have kept me from my baby niece or nephew's first birthday party.  I mean, it's not like any of these people have jobs or bosses to answer to (headships don't count).  

I don't know, that just really bugged me.