S05.E05: Honeymoons Part 2

[KateHearts]

I can't stand how the producers decide to take a theme and beat it to death. This week is: "Cody isn't manly." Followed by his teeth-gnashing doubts about ziplining and embarrassing shots of him cowering away when Danielle touches him as they sit on the couch.  

Second theme: Sheila is into deep analysis of everything.  Followed by a ping pong match where Nate "HAS TO WIN" (my husband would probably be just as competitive!) and then insists it's the only Respectful Thing To Do as Her Highness Queen Wife of Nate to hold his hand anytime he asks.  (Side:  his pronunciation of words is fascinating: "I'm essited to go four wheeling.")

Third theme:  Ashley and Anthony are a Match Made in Heaven (yay experts!!)  She now is daring to do scary things like ride on a catamaran!  Anthony says his job will be to "protect her!"  They had sex!! (and really, the comments after? "I feel sticky"? Her little crack about tasting his sausage? Ugh....)

I am another who finds Anthony not at all good-looking.  His profile shots highlight the unattractive nose and soft receding chin. His eyes are close-set. He's pudgy. Yes, I'm being superficial. But given Ashley's comments about how cute and hot he is, I'm forced to weigh in.  He just isn't.

[humbleopinion]

Ashley is wearing her love goggles firmly affixed and still riding the adrenaline high of her wedding so she is seeing what she wants to see...more power to her.

No crude snarks about drinking his Kool Aid...if you get my drift...lewdness is not to be encouraged.

[Empress1]

I don't find Anthony attractive either, but I could see how he might be able to grow on you. He seems to be a good guy. I think Ashley and Anthony will make it but I do wonder how much of that is Ashley just wanting to be married and have kids RIGHT NOW and being happy that she's with someone who wants that too, vs. being happy to be married to Anthony specifically. I laughed when they said they "finally" had sex because I don't think a week counts as waiting.

Cody and Danielle ... yeah, they messed this one up. It's not quite Heather/Derek levels of mismatch, but they are clearly not a fit. Cody is a kid and isn't ready to be married to anyone. Come back to him in five years and some more life experience and I think he'll make a good husband, but not now. MAYBE he'd be good for someone who is either similarly immature so they could grow together, or someone who is willing to help him grow, but Danielle isn't in either of those categories. I don't think she keeps talking about manly in the sense that she wants a guy to boss her around or fix shit around the house or other manly stereotypes; I think she wants an adult. Cody is not there yet, despite being 26 and owning a gym. He's technically an adult but he's not in the same space as Danielle. This isn't going to work.

Nate and Sheila ... I don't like Nate. He, too, seems really immature. His competitive nature and insistence that I had to hold his hand no matter how I was feeling would put me right off. And Pastor Cal needs to quit with that "Nothing is unforgivable" rhetoric because it's a straight-up lie. There are lots of things that are unforgivable in interpersonal relationships, and telling Sheila that is telling her she has to take all the shit Nate throws at her, which is bullshit. It makes her responsible for Nate's behavior. That was a really irresponsible thing for him to say.

[gonecrackers]

Nate's immaturity was showing, as well as a disrespect for Sheila's feelings. I do give him credit for apologizing & hearing her out. She may grow him up but it could be a bit painful for her while it's happening.  I wished she could let loose to enjoy activities with him but then again, someone that competitive with someone he barely knows makes it more obnoxious than fun. Her sourpuss annoys me even though I get it. How can someone not smile at a horse? Guess it's just me there...

I did feel terrible about her wanting someone to love her when she's not easy to love; even teared up a bit with her. I don't think Nate had a clue what she was talking about. At least he listened; maybe some bells will ring further down the line for him & he'll start to get it.

I still don't see Anthony as hideous or Ashley as stunning, for that matter. I feel looks-wise they're evenly matched. People see others so differently & that's interesting. He seems like a brighter bulb than Ashley, whose life is way too focused on baby making (could be editing there). Ashley can & will enjoy a baby at 40 if it takes that long. Right now my concern for her is she just wants the kids. Once that happens will she still be into her husband or will he become the disposable sperm donor?  Time will tell.

I feel badly for Danielle & Cody; they're both feeling uncomfortable. I think Danielle is trying & doing her best but she can't make Cody something he isn't. I was concerned about Cody saying he wants to hang back a bit & that they're not seeing eye to eye. Either he's clumsy & insecure or it's the editing, or, it's just being with Danielle. I think being with an older, more mature woman who is comfortable with herself & knows what she wants is not helping him at all. I agree with another poster that maybe he needed someone to actually grow with together. I think this is going to be awkward watching them play out this season.

[KateHearts]

Oh, and in defense of Nate (not that there's any great love here), he's a guy who comes from a childhood without a dad, where it seems that he had a role of stand-in husband for his mother and father to his brother; he has no idea how a stable marriage would work, and has an idealized version in which he is the ruler of his castle with his queen/wife there with unconditional respect and brimming with endless admiration.  His comments about her being "disrespectful" because she won't hold his hand and his comments about "my queen" reflect that. As for those who jumped on him being extreme when he said he didn't want to be married anymore- Sheila essentially did the equivalent a couple of times when she said, "I'm done."

I wonder too if Nate's frustration with everything has to do with the fact that he wasn't able to send her to paradise, so to speak, with his sexual prowess. I could see that he would view himself as that good that he'd "give" her the first climax of her life.  

[Wings]

1 hour ago, announcergirl said:

Small penis, I suspect. Or body issues.

Not to be ruled out but I think he is inexperienced.   He lives with his parents.  Sure he lived on his own for a short stint, probably with roommates (guess).   He cannot bring a woman home and he is 25, right?    

I do not fault her for not leading the way.  She wants a man who is champing at the bit to have sex with her.  She wants a more typical man, really. 

Edited May 12, 2017 by wings707

[Racj82]

My boy Anthony. I guess I see myself in him a little bit in that this is kind of the world we live in now. This woman is this level attractive how can she be with this level. It's how I worry about approaching any woman. I'm overweight so any woman that's in some standard of higher attractiveness isnt my league. It only matters what that woman thinks. But, the worry is always there.

But outside if that, there's all these labels put on why she would even like him. She's baby crazy! She's desperate! Etc. Nothing about her comes off as not genuine when it comes to Anthony. He's a guy that works for her. That's all that matters to me as a viewer. As long as he isn't walking around looking like a literal monster than it doesn't seem weird to me at all that anybody would be into anybody else. I may not be attracted to them but it doesn't really matter what I think. And the term beauty is in the eye of the beholder isn't just the title of twilight zone episode. Which is funny because I feel like Anthony is portrayed like the pig looking people in that episode. It's not enough to even register with me.

Just on this episode, I'm not sure that most of these people have matured enough into what they want vs what they need to be married. Anthony and Ashley may be the most put together. At least their issues are real world issues and not superficial or egotistical silliness. No place for that in marriage.

[Madding crowd]

Here is my take on this week's couples: Sheila and Nate: something seems wrong. Sheila is sour-pussed, weepy and upset and it has to be more than is shown. Saying Nate wants to win at ping pong is no reason to be sobbing. I don't like Nate's use of 'disrespectful' or insisting on holding her hand, but she seems very depressed and he shouldn't be expected to know how to deal with a depressed stranger.

Anthony and Ashley-I don't find him attractive personally but no doubt some wouldn't find my husband attractive so we all think differently. Ashley is very pretty but her endless staring at him and smiling would drive me nuts. And show, for what its worth, I don't want to hear about people being sticky after sex-just TMI.

Cody and Danielle: I don't think he is necessarily immature for his age, but he is 26 not 36. You don't have to eat fish eyes or go ziplining to be manly. There are all different types of men. I just think there is no spark there and Danielle thinks if she keeps pushing him to do things one might appear. If Cody were really into Danielle he would want to be more intimate with her. I also think the show is pushing all of them to do more stuff like ziplining because it makes for more interesting TV than sitting on the beach.

I can see Anthony and Ashley sticking together although I think her blinders will come off when they get to the real world, and I think he will tire of being the protector. Having specific roles throughout an entire marriage cannot work long term as situations and people change. My husband of 22 years is a protector of me at times, but there have been times when I have taken the lead to help him with situations because that is what was needed at the time. I really hope Ashley didn't marry him just to get married or to be married by a certain age. We shall see. 

Edited May 12, 2017 by Madding crowd

[Wings]

14 minutes ago, KateHearts said:

Oh, and in defense of Nate (not that there's any great love here), he's a guy who comes from a childhood without a dad, where it seems that he had a role of stand-in husband for his mother and father to his brother; he has no idea how a stable marriage would work, and has an idealized version in which he is the ruler of his castle with his queen/wife there with unconditional respect and brimming with endless admiration.  His comments about her being "disrespectful" because she won't hold his hand and his comments about "my queen" reflect that. As for those who jumped on him being extreme when he said he didn't want to be married anymore- Sheila essentially did the equivalent a couple of times when she said, "I'm done."

I wonder too if Nate's frustration with everything has to do with the fact that he wasn't able to send her to paradise, so to speak, with his sexual prowess. I could see that he would view himself as that good that he'd "give" her the first climax of her life.  

Yes.  Nate needs education on what a healthy marriage looks like.  That is just not going to happen.  He may be in a culture where men in his life act like this with the same expectations.  I am not referring to him being black, we all have cultures that have influenced us.  Family, friends, upbringing, area of the country all contribute to who we are.   But it should not stop there.  

When his mother was clearly upset about not being the queen anymore, Nate showed how little he knows about all relationships.   He should have said, mom you will always be my queen and not set Sheila up to fill that role.   That was insensitive to the max.  They are just words, call Sheila your princess.  Anything else. 

[Wings]

14 minutes ago, Madding crowd said:

Sheila is sour-pussed, weepy and upset and it has to be more than is shown. Saying Nate wants to win at ping pong is no reason to be sobbing. I don't like Nate's use of 'disrespectful' or insisting on holding her hand, but she seems very depressed and he shouldn't be expected to know how to deal with a depressed stranger.

Wanting to win at ping pong is one thing but he was so furious with her for being ahead of him in score that that he fired the balls to her with force and over the top anger.  Her tears were more about his attitude and subsequent talk where he defended his actions and told her he had to win at everything.   She is a piece of work herself.  She has never had a man who loved all of her.   She wants him to allow her to have her petulant moods and love her anyway.  Nope.    This couple is hopeless.  

[MV713]

did anyone else think that the cast looked pretty bad on the "Unfiltered" show?  The women especially - too much eyebrows, too much lipstick on Ashley, idk just off.

So what I got out of the Nate/Sheila drama is that somethings have happened to her in the past that are effecting her ability to deal with Nate, and are also effecting her personality so she is disappointed in how she is appearing to Nate, and that she is pretty devastated thinking of her investment in the process and how easily Nate seems to just "give up."  Hence the breakdown.

The editing is making it look like she is pissed off about ping pong and jet skiis, clearly there is a bigger picture.

Anyone else notice that when Danielle and Cody talk, they seem to be focusing on one while the other is speaking? so you have no clue if they are having the conversation shown or its all spliced together.

[biakbiak]

43 minutes ago, wings707 said:

He lives with his parents.  Sure he lived on his own for a short stint, probably with roommates (guess)

Didn't he say he lived on his own from 18 to 24 so six years is a fairly extensive amount of time so I doubt that has much to do with his inexperience, I mean that could be the issue but I doubt his living situation was the reason.

[bichonblitz]

11 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Ashley and Anthony - God bless her, she is blind and thinks Anthony is handsome - I still think she would feel the same about a lamp post if it married her and promised her a baby

Yeah, I don't think Anthony is handsome at all. He's doughy and out of shape, too. Ashley is very beautiful, he is out of his league looks wise but she doesn't seem to care so that's a good thing. 

Cody needs a nice, cute, shy little country girl. Nothing wrong with that, he just needs someone that he feels comfortable with and Danielle is not it. What could these two possibly have in common? Besides she not only is older than him, she looks older, unlike Nate and Sheila. Sheila is older than Nate but doesn't look it. Anyway, I hope Danielle doesn't keep harping on with her needing a manly man bullshit. Enough, already! 

Nate is a total douche but I hope we don't have to see Sheila crying every episode. She is very damaged and he just wants to have fun, fun, fun. Grow up, rental car manager dude!

[Jellybeans]

There is nothing wrong with Cody not initiating sex.  If Danielle was not ready to have sex, there would be very little criticism.  

It would be better for Cody to refrain from sex if he is not sure about Danielle.  And if it is body issues, then that should be a private conversation.

[Gem 10]

I think Cody is adorable, shy and a good guy overall.  The "experts" did a lousy job matching him and Danielle up.  Couldn't they see it?  He needs a quiet, shy country girl that is younger or the same age.  He is totally out of his comfort zone on this honeymoon and is trying so hard but it isn't working for him.  I'll say it again, these experts stink.  I really feel bad for him.

[itainttippithebird]

I have a theory that if you gave Nate to Danielle and Cody to Sheila, all would be well. I'm a professional sociologist, give me Dr. Pepper's job, MATFS!

(Kidding, sort of, but I do think Danielle would be attracted to Nate's cocky aggression, and Sheila would be better served by Cody's gentleness.)

[Jax7917]

34 minutes ago, Gem 10 said:

I think Cody is adorable, shy and a good guy overall.  The "experts" did a lousy job matching him and Danielle up.  Couldn't they see it?  He needs a quiet, shy country girl that is younger or the same age.  He is totally out of his comfort zone on this honeymoon and is trying so hard but it isn't working for him.  I'll say it again, these experts stink.  I really feel bad for him.

I feel bad for Cody because I get why he isn't feeling comfortable. Danielle keeps harping to the cameras that he isn't manly enough and every second she needs him to do an activity or something to prove that he's manly. Even though she is just telling it to the cameras, I'm sure he gets the hint.

I agree that they arent good together. I too picture him with a small, cute, quiet, country girl. Even looks wise, I see a total mismatch.

[Adeejay]

I found Sheila’s tearful statement that, "I've spent most of my 20s trying to convince men that they wanted this and that I was worth it"
 rather interesting.  Nate is probably not the type of guy she is used to dating, and so she might be resentful for seemingly having to settle.  Say what you want about him, but he politely sat there and listened to her.  Ryan D (Season 2) and Derek (Season 4) would have ripped her to shreds.   

Edited May 12, 2017 by Adeejay

[kira28]

I find Anthony to be the most attractive guy of the three. Initially my reaction was that he was ugly but his personality made me find him attractive. Nate is ugly. I can't stand looking at him. His personality sucks. What are you ten? You get mad and act like a little bitch to your wife because she beat you at ping pong? My five and three year old act like he did when they don't win a game. Time to grow up Nate. He isn't ready for a steady girlfriend much less a wife! Cody poor Cody. I thought he was the best looking at first but his awkwardness is a turn off. I have an ex that would just grab me and kiss me like he was going to eat me alive and he pulled my hair while kissing me. He was very manly and fearless. That's the kind of guy Danielle wants. Of course my guy was very needy and had a soft gentle side too and Danielle would have hated that. I think that couples biggest problem is the age difference. I've only dated a guy three years younger than me and the age difference was glaringly obvious. I can't even stand dating guys my age because they seem immature and I'm in my 30s. Cody is probably intimidated by Danielle. I wonder if he tried something on the wedding night and she abruptly shut him down because he's been walking on eggshells about sex ever since. I think Danielle sees Cody as as someone she has to babysit and not her equal

[twenangst]

ok, Danielle scares me. She's like a character from a porn movie - one written and directed by and directed at men (and particularly UNenlightened men, at that). Next thing she's going to confess to having rape fantasies. I'm really disturbed by her.

[pdlinda1]

31 minutes ago, Jaclyn88 said:

I feel bad for Cody because I get why he isn't feeling comfortable. Danielle keeps harping to the cameras that he isn't manly enough and every second she needs him to do an activity or something to prove that he's manly. Even though she is just telling it to the cameras, I'm sure he gets the hint.

I agree that they arent good together. I too picture him with a small, cute, quiet, country girl. Even looks wise, I see a total mismatch.

I think that Cody may have a genuine anxiety problem that probably should be worked on with a professional IF he wants any type of "functional" relationship with ANY woman...backwoods country type or any other type.  It's obvious that Danielle is an awful match for him, but from what I'm observing Cody feels comfortable with his lifestyle focused on his business and home life with family.  Nothing wrong with that.  WHY did he volunteer for this show??? Maybe he and his brother were enticed by the idea, but in the end, I think Cody's in way over his head emotionally and in every other way...

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

Bride And Doom: Show Me A Graceful Loser, I'll Show You Someone Who's Not Used To Winning

Some Married At First Sight couples may be starting to wonder whether this honeymoon should have been shorter.

[Wings]

31 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

Didn't he say he lived on his own from 18 to 24 so six years is a fairly extensive amount of time so I doubt that has much to do with his inexperience, I mean that could be the issue but I doubt his living situation was the reason.

Oh, I don't think that was the reason.  I think he created the living situation that worked for him.  Kind of a catch 22.  ;^)   

1 hour ago, kira28 said:

I find Anthony to be the most attractive guy of the three. Initially my reaction was that he was ugly but his personality made me find him attractive. Nate is ugly. I can't stand looking at him. His personality sucks. What are you ten? You get mad and act like a little bitch to your wife because she beat you at ping pong? My five and three year old act like he did when they don't win a game. Time to grow up Nate. He isn't ready for a steady girlfriend much less a wife! Cody poor Cody. I thought he was the best looking at first but his awkwardness is a turn off. I have an ex that would just grab me and kiss me like he was going to eat me alive and he pulled my hair while kissing me. He was very manly and fearless. That's the kind of guy Danielle wants. Of course my guy was very needy and had a soft gentle side too and Danielle would have hated that. I think that couples biggest problem is the age difference. I've only dated a guy three years younger than me and the age difference was glaringly obvious. I can't even stand dating guys my age because they seem immature and I'm in my 30s. Cody is probably intimidated by Danielle. I wonder if he tried something on the wedding night and she abruptly shut him down because he's been walking on eggshells about sex ever since. I think Danielle sees Cody as as someone she has to babysit and not her equal

I agree with every word.  :^)

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, itainttippithebird said:

I have a theory that if you gave Nate to Danielle and Cody to Sheila, all would be well. I'm a professional sociologist, give me Dr. Pepper's job, MATFS!

(Kidding, sort of, but I do think Danielle would be attracted to Nate's cocky aggression, and Sheila would be better served by Cody's gentleness.)

Y E S!   Lets all kick Pepper out and put you in.  You sound like you know people !

[humbleopinion]

N8 and Shelia had the best honeymoon accommodations from the private dining in different locations on the property to the nice bedroom suite in a villa to the stocked wine fridge.

Cody and Danielle was at the Best Western on the backwash of the bay...

Note to Cody...you can send the whole fish back and ask the kitchen staff to debone it for you instead of hacking it like live bait.

Cody seemed even more boyish, even high schoolish ... rode the jetski like a granny, confessed to live with mom, awkward table manners, just lacking self confidence and the knowingness that comes with living and having learned from life... Danielle desires to have a fully formed man, a possible husband... just needing a few tweaks.

Cody is Josh (the Tom Hanks character) from the movie Big...especially bashful about having sex.

Danielle is Susan, the Elizabeth Perkins character in Big who eventually creeped herself out when she realized she had sex and was falling for a man- child.

Edited May 12, 2017 by humbleopinion
grammar and clarity

[Zanne505]

They should do a switch show the last 3 weeks. Most don't even like each other by then, why not make them switch? See how that works.

If Cody is intimidated by danielle, he would crap his pants with sheila. She's a sharp girl (with issues) and he would have ulcers and panick attacks by day 2 trying to be what she wanted. 

Anthony is ok, but i get a sleazy vibe - didn't like how he was pawing the stripper.

[gigiann]

Is there an age limit for this show?  Everyone seems so young.  Are they really ready for marriage with a stranger when they probably hardly know themselves at that age?  I think Sheila would be better off with a more mature man who is more comfortable with himself and open to a real relationship and not the "queen/king" aspect, but more reality.  I would like to see couples in their 30's or even early 40's who have never married who are seriously looking for marriage but just never found the right partner or maybe their last long term relationship took up a huge amount of their 20's and their partner would never make the final commitment.  Something like that....JMHO

[Magoo]

53 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Cody seemed even more boyish, even high schoolish ... rode the jetski like a granny, confessed to live with mom, awkward table manners,

There was a shot of him positively hunched over his plate at their, ahem...last supper.  He looked like a high school football player diving into his dinner like his life depended on it.  Having no idea if he's truly a nice guy or not, I can only base my opinion on what I've seen so far, which is that his timidity and apparent lack of confidence would drive me bananas.  I'm joining the chorus of Why The Hell Did He Go On This Show?  

[Snarklepuss]

23 hours ago, announcergirl said:

Small penis, I suspect. Or body issues.

I think it's body issues.  Isn't Cody the guy that lost a lot of weight?  He's probably inexperienced because he was heavy and also still has body issues.  Many people that lose a lot of weight still feel unattractive even though they aren't heavy anymore.

Edited May 13, 2017 by Snarklepuss
Left out the word "the", argh!

[Snarklepuss]

16 hours ago, Racj82 said:

She just might have different taste than you. Doesn't make her blind. The man isn't a ogre. I don't see why some people find it hard to believe that she would find him attractive even if you don't.

I would never invalidate someone's taste, that's her business.  I don't find it hard to believe that Ashley (not me) would find Anthony attractive at all, that's not what I said.  I also didn't say he was an ogre either.  I think I'm entitled to voice an opinion on whether or not I find him attractive.  I think Ashley is primed to find just about any guy or lamp post attractive at this point.  She has a one track mind about wanting a baby like yesterday and has no problem telling Anthony that only days after they just met.  I'm sure her sense of urgency would make any guy feel under pressure and like he's not much more than just a sperm donor to her, not someone she likes for him and him alone.  That's why I said she would likely find a lamp post attractive if it wanted to marry her and give her a baby.  Her baby clock is going off so loud she would mate with just about anyone at this point.  I don't think she has a lot of depth.  YMMV if you think otherwise.

[gonecrackers]

Random ...

Anthony's hair when he wakes up is quite funny.

My favorites so far - the snail, the lizard, & the horses... oh, & the sharks. They were there, just, camera shy.

[Kiss my mutt]

Maybe Cody was overweight for so long that he still has some insecurities from that that is causing some of his meekness. He also needs a lesson in shaving. He always has some kind of shaving burn going on at this neck. Danielle is too old for him and she looks much older than 30 to me. 

Anthony isn't ugly but that slicked back hair do with those big floppy ears and pasty skin just make him look like a dweeb.  He's so much more attractive with his hair natural.  I wouldn't want to come near that grease pit he's got going on.  They have the best chance of working out based on what I've seen.  

I never warmed up to Nate.  Shelia's outburst last week caught me off guard and seemed like a huge overreaction which makes me think there is more going on.  Nate is in no way ready to settle down and I wouldn't be surprised if he cheats on her if they do stay married.  The whole, btw, my brother has to live with us would be a deal breaker for me and it should have precluded him from being on the show.  I was truly surprised that Sheila accepted that so magnanimously.  

[humbleopinion]

The tease for next week's episode has N8 and Shelia sitting on one part of the couch and Tyree benevolently sitting and grinning on the next section...cozy indeed.

Wondering why Anthony was wearing my granny's hair piece on his head...no doubt it takes 2 fistfuls of hair gel to tame those locks.

Danielle is committed to those dark heavy eyebrows and Cousin Itt (google him) bangs.

Too much going on above her eyes...maybe a barrette to swoop the bangs?

[crgirl412]

22 hours ago, roseslg said:

I thought Cody said he needed to let his balls down.

I'm not entirely sure he has any given what we haven't seen!! 

[Wings]

44 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

I think it's body issues.  Isn't Cody guy that lost a lot of weight?  He's probably inexperienced because he was heavy and also still has body issues.  Many people that lose a lot of weight still feel unattractive even though they aren't heavy anymore.

Ah, I had forgotten this; he lost 100 pounds.  There it is.  

[crgirl412]

13 minutes ago, wings707 said:

Ah, I had forgotten this; he lost 100 pounds.  There it is.  

He probably has excess skin that can be surgically removed which is all well and good if he wants to go that route BUT the experts didn't catch any of that in their "extensive" research on each person??  Anyone in 8th grade and above who understands the basics of boys and girls liking each other could see that they don't seem to fit together.  Anyone 21 and older would be able to feel the energy difference between them if they spotted them in any bar or club in America. 

[brilliantbreakfast]

Random thoughts:

"Manly man".  What does this even MEAN?  Danielle wants to be thought of as a badass, but she wants a "manly man".  Who is she looking for, some big mindless lummox to drag her by her hair off into the jungle?  What does that mean?  I suspect what she means is "I want someone who is strong enough to not let me push him around, because I can be bossy."  (I speak from experience on that front.)  If that's the case, then Cody isn't it.  Her goading him into eating the fish eye was pretty cruel, if you ask me.  My sense is that he has no idea what marriage means.  He has some vague idea of wanting to have someone to sit on the couch with.  He seems to be a pretty low-energy guy.  Remember, he OWNS the gym.  Doesn't mean he works out in it.

I'm sorry, but Sheila is cray-cray.  And I say that as someone who spent many of her first dates with her husband crying out of sheer terror that at some point he would leave.  And because I was dieting and HUNGRY AS HELL, but that's another story.  She comes with whole steamer trunks of emotional baggage, and she really should work that out before thinking of marriage.  Nate is immature and maybe a bit ADHD but I do get a sense that even though he's clueless, he is at least trying in his own inept, hurtful way.  If the so-called experts want this to work, they need to find a therapist for Shelia -- STAT.

Anthony and Ashley:  My favorite couple ever in the history of this show.  (Sorry, Jason and Cortney).  She is going to be a handful, but the more I see of him, the more I think "What a great guy."  Yes, he has that odd, wide-open face and he's kind of doughy, but to me that makes him adorable.  He's charming, and a keeper.  I think they will do great.  It bugs me that Ashley has such a bad case of baby madness.   I'm so grateful that I never had this.  Baby madness has made every woman I ever knew who had it make bad choices.

[zxy556575]

5 minutes ago, brilliantbreakfast said:

It bugs me that Ashley has such a bad case of baby madness. I'm so grateful that I never had this. Baby madness has made every woman I ever knew who had it make bad choices.

Of all the women who've been on the show claiming the main thing they want in life is to be married, I believe Ashley the most. Her standards are modest and Anthony meets them so she's all in. "The husband" is the least important person in her fantasy Facebook photo page of "my family."

I apologize if I'm being dismissive, but baby fever is just foreign to me.

[Wings]

52 minutes ago, crgirl412 said:

He probably has excess skin that can be surgically removed which is all well and good if he wants to go that route BUT the experts didn't catch any of that in their "extensive" research on each person??  Anyone in 8th grade and above who understands the basics of boys and girls liking each other could see that they don't seem to fit together.  Anyone 21 and older would be able to feel the energy difference between them if they spotted them in any bar or club in America. 

 No. At his age his skin snapped back. 100 pounds is not that much to be in that category.   He is living his life with the residual fat identity.  My heart goes out to him.  He will suffer the consequences of being exposed as less than manly.  Poor guy. Really. He irritates the shit out of me but at the same tone I get it. I am horrified the experts have not taken more sensitive care of his  situation.  

[announcergirl]

2 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

I think it's body issues.  Isn't Cody guy that lost a lot of weight?  He's probably inexperienced because he was heavy and also still has body issues.  Many people that lose a lot of weight still feel unattractive even though they aren't heavy anymore.

Yes, he was much larger. Very possible.

[humbleopinion]

Ashley is employed by her family's bar and restaurant so she has an income she can live on...

She has family close by... her sister, Lauren especially close...

If she just wanted to be a mother so badly then she could use a sperm donor and have a kid.

But Ashley wants a husband and a baby...the whole package...like her friends and family.

She was with a guy for 5 years and he didn't want to commit.

Her sister's infertility has moved Ashley's timeline up and stokes her fears that she may also have difficulty getting pregnant.

Anthony is 33 and thinks waiting 5 years to start a family is reasonable because he has confidence in his swimmers.

While the question about babies was producer driven their answers were truthful.

If they stay together the baby making will probably commence sooner than later.

[Wings]

Shelia is 31 and Nate 26.  Danielle 30 and Cody 26.  Ashley is 30 and Anthony 33.  

Right there you see it.  Same age couple is working.   Putting mid 20 boys with 30 year old women is not a recipe for success.   

Surely someone will come along and claim a successful marriage of 40 years with a much younger man.  Of course that happens but when you are casting a show ya gotta go with the odds rather than hope you have the long shot.   So the took the 2 black people and put them together (no brainer) then they drew straws for the other 4.  Anyone have a better theory?

1 hour ago, crgirl412 said:

He probably has excess skin that can be surgically removed which is all well and good if he wants to go that route BUT the experts didn't catch any of that in their "extensive" research on each person??  Anyone in 8th grade and above who understands the basics of boys and girls liking each other could see that they don't seem to fit together.  Anyone 21 and older would be able to feel the energy difference between them if they spotted them in any bar or club in America. 

No, he young and 100 lbs is not enough to not need that. 

[ChristmasJones]

It is very odd that they put mid-20's guys into these marriages. I feel bad for the women who got paired with them.

[sarkygal]

9 hours ago, Jellybeans said:

There is nothing wrong with Cody not initiating sex.  If Danielle was not ready to have sex, there would be very little criticism.  

It would be better for Cody to refrain from sex if he is not sure about Danielle.  And if it is body issues, then that should be a private conversation.

I completely agree Jellybeans. I actually commend him on not having sex with someone he's known for a week simply cause they're married on TV. Sure he's young and unexposed, but he's fundamentally a good guy.

1 hour ago, brilliantbreakfast said:

 

I'm sorry, but Sheila is cray-cray.  And I say that as someone who spent many of her first dates with her husband crying out of sheer terror that at some point he would leave.  And because I was dieting and HUNGRY AS HELL, but that's another story.  She comes with whole steamer trunks of emotional baggage, and she really should work that out before thinking of marriage.  Nate is immature and maybe a bit ADHD but I do get a sense that even though he's clueless, he is at least trying in his own inept, hurtful way.  If the so-called experts want this to work, they need to find a therapist for Shelia -- STAT.

Anthony and Ashley:  My favorite couple ever in the history of this show.  (Sorry, Jason and Cortney).  She is going to be a handful, but the more I see of him, the more I think "What a great guy."  Yes, he has that odd, wide-open face and he's kind of doughy, but to me that makes him adorable.  He's charming, and a keeper.  I think they will do great.  It bugs me that Ashley has such a bad case of baby madness.   I'm so grateful that I never had this.  Baby madness has made every woman I ever knew who had it make bad choices.

I'm going to defend Sheila and say there's more going on than we're seeing. I strongly believe Nate is not the supportive albeit smarmy guy he's playing for the cameras. I'm staying unspoiled, but something about him just has alarm bells screaming in my head.

I find A&A to be the same level of attractiveness. She's got a rodent face with little teeth. Her sister was truly gorgeous. Anthony's got a dad bod, great smile and fun personality. I can see them making it work. 

[Lopethina]

I lost 90 lbs in my mid-20s and absolutely needed plastic surgery to get rid of the skin.  In fact, there was a shot of Cody on the beach and you could see his love handles hanging over the sides of his swim trunks. 

 

Danielle said she likes his body, and I dont know how severe his skin issues are, but I would bet he's just inexperienced with women because they wouldnt talk to him in his formative years.

[Soup333]

Sheila's hair is just not doing her any favors. I hate it. 

I feel like the religion thing will keep Sheila and Nate together, even if they don't really mesh well. They might be pressured to make it work no matter what. 

Edited May 13, 2017 by Soup333

[jonesingjay]

Anthony is doughy, but he doesn't have a painful looking razor bump rash on his neck. 

[Snarklepuss]

4 hours ago, wings707 said:

Shelia is 31 and Nate 26.  Danielle 30 and Cody 26.  Ashley is 30 and Anthony 33.  

Right there you see it.  Same age couple is working.   Putting mid 20 boys with 30 year old women is not a recipe for success.   

Surely someone will come along and claim a successful marriage of 40 years with a much younger man.  Of course that happens but when you are casting a show ya gotta go with the odds rather than hope you have the long shot.   So the took the 2 black people and put them together (no brainer) then they drew straws for the other 4.  Anyone have a better theory?

I agree with you completely, even though my father was 26 and my mother 30 when they got married in 1954 and their marriage was very long and happy.  They were a very atypical case in just about every way, especially for their time.  My mother had a dominant "take charge" personality while my father is laid back and (in her words) a "what me worry?" type like Alfred E. Neuman from Mad magazine.  My father liked having someone to manage certain details of his life and my mother was very happy to oblige.  Theirs was a match made in heaven because their atypical personalities fit the inverted age difference.  Sheila and Nate don't have the right personalities to go along with the younger man/older woman dynamic, IMO.  Neither do Cody and Danielle.  Danielle is talking about wanting a "manly man" because she's really not the dominant woman that this relationship is kind of forcing her to be and I'm not sure Cody would really want a woman like that anyway, especially when and if he "grows up".

Edited May 13, 2017 by Snarklepuss

[Snarklepuss]

5 hours ago, brilliantbreakfast said:

"Manly man".  What does this even MEAN?  Danielle wants to be thought of as a badass, but she wants a "manly man".  Who is she looking for, some big mindless lummox to drag her by her hair off into the jungle?  What does that mean?  I suspect what she means is "I want someone who is strong enough to not let me push him around, because I can be bossy."  (I speak from experience on that front.)  If that's the case, then Cody isn't it.  Her goading him into eating the fish eye was pretty cruel, if you ask me.  My sense is that he has no idea what marriage means.  He has some vague idea of wanting to have someone to sit on the couch with.  He seems to be a pretty low-energy guy.  Remember, he OWNS the gym.  Doesn't mean he works out in it.

I think "manly man" is a code phrase being used by Danielle to mean a mature man, not some kind of he-man brute or anything like that.  I don't think she's bossy either or else she would likely LOVE a guy that took the submissive role.  IMO Danielle (and the show) have made a "thing" about her wanting a mature "manly man" because it's so obvious that Cody is just about the opposite.  He seems intimidated by her even though she would not be that intimidating to any reasonably "manly" guy - And I think she would be fine with a reasonable amount of manliness.  Case in point, Anthony is mature and IMO "manly" enough to not be intimidated by Danielle.  He seems reasonably confident in himself as a guy in his ability to please a woman and be what she needs - Which, to answer your question, are characteristics of mature (aka "manly") men.  Not that I think Danielle would have been better matched with Anthony, but someone who shares her interests and has other commonalities with her that is like Anthony in that way.

[Guest]

Sheila made a comment about wanting to wake up in the morning and feel normal.  That sounds like she knows she has issues, so I don't understand why she was deemed to be ready for this situation.   Nate's behavior at the ping pong table was just scary. If he's that aggressive having fun, how will he react when he's angry?