S08.E05: Another Catfishing

[Christina]

I really have to stop reading this thread because I just get irritated by Meri's lies and avoidance. I should be pissed at myself for watching in the first place, since I knew that the end result wasn't going to be truthful, but I really want to know what puzzle piece finally made Meri realize "Sam" didn't exist. I suspect that someone from production asked her if she was planning to leave for "Sam", having figured out that she continued the relationship with him out of the public eye, and when she said yes, they sat her down and showed her Nick's blog. If we believe what she said in this episode, all the alarm bells had been ringing for a while, but "Sam" was able to give answers she believed, and one of JOs tactics is to become angry and verbally and emotionally abusive resulting in her victims apologizing and trying to make up to which ever alter ego she was at the time. It takes someone at a horribly low point in their life to put up with that crap.

Also, her story about seeing the television show Pan Am in a gift shop is just bull. When JO disclosed the photos of "Sam" that were sent to Meri, there were at least three different men. Very clearly different men. One was the actor from Pan Am, one was a Canadian fitness model, and there was that musician. They looked nothing alike. There were also partial photos with heads cropped off that people were not able to find the actual person, but it was probably one of JOs other victims. She tended to send and receive photos from her victims that she used to victimize other prey. I don't know why I want to know the final straw, but I do. If she were to admit it was production that sat her down and showed her Nick's blog, I would be all, "Of course!" but if it was something else, I'd probably be, "You liar!" so there is really no point to keep thinking about it, but my brain refuses to let it go. 

8 hours ago, MrSmith said:

I said to my wife that I think they're the perfect polygamous family to show on TV. They spout the lies about the benefits and "selling points" of polygamy and then proceed to demonstrate exactly how much bullshit all of their talk about polygamy's benefits really is exactly that: bullshit. I was never interested in such a romantic relationship "arrangement", but if I had ever been, then this show would have solved that problem for me! I cannot imagine a man or woman anywhere watching this show and thinking "That looks great! I want the kinds of relationships they've got!"

Urggg, I can't type under this quote because the boxes won't separate, but I give you as Exhibit A, Mykelti's new husband. I think that is exactly what he thought, he could have multiple women treating him like he was a god, all the while not actually having to care about them or their needs and getting to be on television to boot.

8 hours ago, laurakaye said:

And Meri...golly gee, maybe we should THANK the catfish for bringing us closer?  Thank the person who you thought was bugging your house, following your kid, saying awful things about your "husband," knocking your religion, threatening you, following you, telling you what shirt your wore to the grocery store that morning, etc?  What that tells me is that if Meri finds another honey on social media, and this time he turns out to be real, she's gone.  I think that a part of her is still in love with the idea of Sam, even though she knows he's not real.  She's going to remember those euphoric feelings forever and will search for the next person who can give her that fix, because she knows it won't ever be Kody.

When JO catfished Nick, she didn't seem to get any money out of him. He became angry and decided to uncover her deceit and tell everyone who she is. Both Cheryl and Stacey were devastated that "Sam" wasn't real, because they had both fallen deeply in love with him. If Stacey were to win the lottery, I'm pretty sure Sam would rise from the dead (or however he extricated himself) and fear that Stacey would take him back. There was an episode of Dr. Phil where he sat a women down and detailed the love letter emails were from a site for catfishers, and they all used the same one, the passport he provided her was fake and how to tell, etc., her daughter said on a follow-up when he was doing the same thing for another woman scammed, that she left the show understanding she was scammed out of her money, but as soon as he called and begged her to talk to him she did, and his voice pulled her right back into his web of lies. The emotional roller coaster of the catfishers become addictive to the prey. Meri is absolutely still in love with "Sam" which is why I think she has decided to not engage with JO any longer. She said it was pity because JO was broken, but I think it is because she is still in love with "Sam" and doesn't want to lose that, too.

1 hour ago, VedaPierce said:

Thank u for taking the time to write this all up and shed some light! I'm wondering if Meri ever returned that check for 10k to the rightful owner, Cheryl is it? The check Lindsey gave Meri for the goo was the one she grifted from Cheryl? I would think cheryl could make claims to it which is possibly why Kody was opposed to Meri going out to meet with her...

BWHAHAHAHAHA. Stacey was the one who JO scammed money out of and gave to Meri, but it was probably spent the next day. JO wasn't able to get any money from Meri, because she didn't have any to give. JO originally only released a limited amount of voicemails. I think that was the warning to pay up or else. Only the Browns didn't have any money, and TLC probably wouldn't because the scandal would equal ratings.

JO is a liar. Meri is a liar. The only reason to believe JO over Meri is because she had texts and voicemails to back up her claims. She said things we learned were true, and she did it before the shows aired. I think that JO was behind the fake text messages between Meri and Kendra where Meri was admitting to the affair. In those, she made stupid mistakes like a response being time-stamped before the text it was responding to, and misspellings of the kids names. If she made those mistakes, which readers picked up on immediately, I doubt she wouldn't have done the same with all of the Meri texts. Someone ran the voicemails through a software that was supposed to pick up on obvious cuts, because they make a noise, but was unable to find any, and it was Meri's voice.

"Lindsay" would call Meri and tell her she needed to call and apologize to "Sam" because she hurt his feelings, and Meri did. That was the only type of threat she received until after she discovered "Sam" wasn't real, at which point I think JO did threaten her, not only with blackmail but with tracking her location by phone, etc. She continued to take JOs calls after she knew Sam wasn't real, and after JO was harassing her, because that was her contact to "Sam" and I think she was still in love with him. She could have very easily blocked JOs number, and could have not answered when she got a number she didn't recognize and check voicemail later. But she didn't, probably couldn't, because she was in love with a fantasy.

[SongbirdHollow]

1 hour ago, Christina said:

I really have to stop reading this thread because I just get irritated by Meri's lies and avoidance. I should be pissed at myself for watching in the first place, since I knew that the end result wasn't going to be truthful, but I really want to know what puzzle piece finally made Meri realize "Sam" didn't exist. I suspect that someone from production asked her if she was planning to leave for "Sam", having figured out that she continued the relationship with him out of the public eye, and when she said yes, they sat her down and showed her Nick's blog. If we believe what she said in this episode, all the alarm bells had been ringing for a while, but "Sam" was able to give answers she believed, and one of JOs tactics is to become angry and verbally and emotionally abusive resulting in her victims apologizing and trying to make up to which ever alter ego she was at the time. It takes someone at a horribly low point in their life to put up with that crap.

Wanting to believe it so badly and "Sam's" insistence to this day that he is real is a pretty powerful combination. I mean, JO still hasn't given up. It's impressive in an evil genius sort of way.

[CofCinci]

1 hour ago, SongbirdHollow said:

Wanting to believe it so badly and "Sam's" insistence to this day that he is real is a pretty powerful combination. I mean, JO still hasn't given up. It's impressive in an evil genius sort of way.

Yes.  JO put so much time and resources (which seem limited) into this story -- and still does.  I'm sure that same amount of commitment was put towards trapping Meri --- and then keeping her in fear.

[Alapaki]

Thanks for posting the link to the bullshit book club for the recap of "Sam's" book.  Boy, that blogger deserves a hug and a fifth of scotch for slogging through that screed.

Meri had to look past so many red flags, that either she needs seriously intensive therapy to explore what would make her so oblivious, or she thought she was running game on Sam/JO (looking for more from where that initial $10k came from).

[Sista Snarky]

The Catfish was a total asshat when it came to reeling Meri in.

Meri jumped on that line within days & held on to that hook like her life depended on it.  Jesus 1500 calls & 300 desperate sister wife voicemails in 5 months. Catfish is the only asshat that wouldn't be in a witness protection program with her.

I  mean ok so I love you & you love me & you are now my  forever  Baby. Baby! Baaaabbbby! Shudder.

She may be a woman that has limited experience in the love & romance department outside that disasterous marriage  but c'mon she's 45 years old.

It reads like they were 2 lost emo female souls that have never had sex. Ever.

It was so obvious that was not a man.

Edited January 5, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[Love2dance]

7 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

Except that when gays marry, it is still a one-to-one relationship, not one-to-many.  Bigamy is a crime in all states no matter what the gender.

But, whoever would have thought 20 years ago that marriage between same sex couples would become the law of the land in the USA? I can imagine a time in the future, especially seeing the sexual fluidity many young people are advocating, that any number of combinations could become legally accepted. Now, I have my hands full with just one hubby, but others may have a different view, and I am OK with that.

Edited January 5, 2017 by Love2dance
Grammar

[ReadMeLattice]

5 hours ago, Adiba said:

I am not so much as defending Meri's behavior as really trying to understand Mariah's thought process about her mother and father's relationship or lack thereof. I guess it is disturbing to realize that your parents do not have the relationship that you thought they had and that they only paid lip service to. But even before the catfish situation, even a casual observer could see how unhappy Meri was. Surely her daughter had a clue? And it does matter, imo, what Mariah believes in if she is to judge her mother, because that forms the basis of that judgment, of what she considers right and wrong or moral/immoral.

My opinion is coming from someone who watched my parents fight for yearsand wished sometimes that they would divorce ( they didn't) and saw my mother very unhappy. I guess that colors my opinion here. 

Not to excuse Meri in having an emotional affair--I believe you should fully exit one relationship before entering another. 

I don't think that personally not wanting to become a polygamist means you think your parents' marriage is invalid and fidelity isn't required. If I had poly parents I'd expect them to honor their commitments. Her shift to monogamy doesn't mean her parents' marriage and promises dissolve...On the contrary, as you become more open minded you're likely to start seeing all relationship configurations as valid. Plus, her own parents see their marriage as valid. To suddenly decide her mom didn't need to be faithful wouldn't be a favor to Meri, it would be an insult to their ongoing marriage and beliefs. 

[Meowwww]

Meri in the voicemails came across as someone who doesn't know flirting or love.  The banana pic?  Tame in today's standards. 

She was all in. I wish she would own it rather than playing victim.  

[Armchair Critic]

5 hours ago, Christina said:

I suspect that someone from production asked her if she was planning to leave for "Sam", having figured out that she continued the relationship with him out of the public eye, and when she said yes, they sat her down and showed her Nick's blog.

I thought I had read all the posts on here but who is Nick?!

[kentlady]

First I want to apologize for asking this question.  But I rarely watch Sister Wives anymore.  However, I do admit having an interest when I read about things happening (Meri's catfish and the divorce).  But regarding the catfishing, I just can't figure this one out.  I've tried reading through this thread, but I can't seem to grasp the real picture.

So I have to ask.... who is the person who catfished Meri?  Is this person a man or a woman?  Did Meri really meet this person in person?  Did they have a physical relationship or not?  Who is Sam?  Who is Nick?  

Thank you so much for your patience in answering my questions.  

[Sista Snarky]

The Catfish is a woman named Jackie Overton from Oklahoma posing as "Samuel Jacob Cooper" & also posing as a female sidekick to "Fake Sam"  Sidekick name..."Lindsay Jackson"

Meri met the female persona "Lindsay" but never met "Fake Sam"because "Fake Sam" does not exist & Jackie could only pose as the female persona "Lindsay" 

No physical relationship because  "Fake Sam" but Jackie as "Fake Sam" & Meri had many frequent phone conversations that were adult in nature when Jackie as "Fake Sam" spoke (on the phone with the phoniest fake "southern gentleman" voice ever in the history of pretend male  voices) with Meri.

Nick O'Connor  has a blog that exposed Jackie as "Fake Sam" & many other alternate Catfish (Jackie Overton) personas.

Tune in tomorrow for another episode of As the Catfish Turns. ?

Edited January 5, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[TurtlePower]

13 hours ago, SongbirdHollow said:

Wanting to believe it so badly and "Sam's" insistence to this day that he is real is a pretty powerful combination. I mean, JO still hasn't given up. It's impressive in an evil genius sort of way.

I think at this point JO is delusional. An even halfway intelligent person would see there's enough real evidence against her.

It's like the same assholes from Nev Schulman's "Catfish" whom he and Max catch and you see later on they're still catfishing, even though they have been exposed on national television. 

Edited January 5, 2017 by Runnergirl

[VedaPierce]

On January 3, 2017 at 1:56 PM, Lm2162 said:

@seasick, unfortunately that's not true at all (that it's a so what now). I wish it was when it's not. When I came out as bi I was disowned, told I was disgusting and should have never been born, etc., by my parents, and they aren't very conservative. My birthday was soon after that and my mom didn't say a word to me. Later she emailed me that she wished she'd had an abortion. Many of my friends had similar or much worse experiences (being beaten, kicked out of the house, losing a job, excluded from all family events). And I'm in my 20s so this was not long ago. 

"The fight is over now" is sooooo untrue. Laws still exist that allow discrimination against gays in the workplace. Hate crimes continue in large numbers. People still get physically or sexually assaulted for being trans or gay. Therapists still tell people they're just confused. People still get fired, disowned or shunned for it.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. You never deserved that treatment. Nobody's child does. (((((((LM2162)))))))

[crazycatlady58]

Lm2162, many cyber hugs. I am so sorry  your parents  treated you this way, there is no excuse  for that. 

[lookeyloo]

@Lm2162 - oy that is awful.  I wish I were your mother.  When my son came out, I gave him a hug and asked him did he still want meatloaf for dinner, as he had requested.  I posted somewhere else that my first thought was I wouldn't have grandchildren from him, but, so what. And to worry about him since he was now the member of two hated minority groups (Jewish and gay).  That was about 20 years ago.   We moved closer to him and his husband.  I wouldn't change a thing about him.  

[Kohola3]

40 minutes ago, VedaPierce said:

I'm so sorry this happened to you. You never deserved that treatment. Nobody's child does

It's easy to say that in this day and age (although, as has been pointed out hate crimes continue to persist and are likely to increase as the new administration encourages people to drop the filter of civility and express their hatred openly) but some of us oldsters were raised in an entirely different mindset. I went to Catholic schools and "those kind of people" were openly shunned.  I have overcome it but there are still those who cannot shake the deeply ingrained teachings of their families and churches.  

[Quickbeam]

10 hours ago, Meowwww said:

She was all in. I wish she would own it rather than playing victim.  

Don't use that word! Hee. 

[Roslyn]

1 hour ago, Runnergirl said:

I think at this point JO is delusional. An even halfway intelligent person would see there's enough real evidence against her.

It's like the same assholes from Nev Schulman's "Catfish" whom he and Max catch and you see later on they're still catfishing, even though they have been exposed on national television. 

Oh I think it's safe to say that JO is delusional and has been for a very long time.  When the catfish stuff with Meri came out I remember skimming Nick's blog and understanding that she (JO) has been doing this for a very long time.  She found her "MO" with the handsome rich man as bait and the role of plucky sidekick for herself and just started to reel them in (so to speak)

I remember reading about the woman who was at the heart of the beginning of what we all now call "catfishing".  The original movie following Nev and his online relationship that turned out to be not just a lie, but a complex web of many lies all leading back to one lonely woman.  It was an interview with her husband, who struggled to understand what his wife had truly done who coined the phrase "Catfish" as we now understand it, even though this behavior dates back to the beginning of the internet I'm sure. She was outed on film for everyone to see, she openly admitted to doing what she did, but yet when the cameras were gone she fell back into her desire to go online and be someone else, it became an obsession with her.

I have also read where lots of people are shocked that someone can do this.  That one person can create so many multiple accounts over so many social media platforms and get away with harassment of so many people. Yes.  One person can do this.  I never doubted it because I saw it for myself.  Some years ago when my daughter was in high school she and her friends became the online target of a very mentally sick and delusional girl.  By the time my daughter finally told me what was going on (about 6 months into it) and sat me in front of her computer...well...I sat there with my mouth hanging open as she started showing me all the different "profiles" that this girl had created to a.) show love and support to herself online and b.) to harass others AND make it look like these girls were harassing HER online.  It was quickly clear to me that this was the same girl.  She couldn't hide her writing style.  In fact, when I read the crap that JO put on the batman blog I was shocked at the similarities in writing style.  Endless words saying nothing, bizarre sentence structure, gaslighting and then all the fake people created to comment and come in to make the real person look more real (?) I told her to screen shot and save everything, and she filled four large flashdrives of evidence.  She met face to face with the girl and her parents, calling her out and showing her evidence.  That got her a whole week before it just started up again.  In the end my daughter became a very good online computer detective and we were at the stage of taking everything to the police to try to get it to stop.  In the initial interview my daughter decided not to go any further.  She said that she needed to focus on her school work and she wanted her life back.  She deleted everything she had on those social media platforms, but she saved the evidence just in case (I still have it) and she moved on quite happily.  She is now a Junior in university and is happy and settled.  While visiting a friend over the holidays she learned that this girl is still living at home and still on the computer making up people and stories.  It's sad, but there are people out there like this.  I always wondered if JO doesn't have one of those rooms like you see on Law & Order shows.  Where the walls are covered with all the information she has compiled for her characters and her "marks" to keep the stories and photos and timelines straight.

[VedaPierce]

31 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

It's easy to say that in this day and age (although, as has been pointed out hate crimes continue to persist and are likely to increase as the new administration encourages people to drop the filter of civility and express their hatred openly) but some of us oldsters were raised in an entirely different mindset. I went to Catholic schools and "those kind of people" were openly shunned.  I have overcome it but there are still those who cannot shake the deeply ingrained teachings of their families and churches.  

I'm lucky to say I don't know people like the the ones you describe. I also haven't seen the new administration encouraging that hatred be expressed openly (!) Yikes! Can u post a link to that one?

Edited January 5, 2017 by VedaPierce

[Adiba]

I agree with you you actually, Lm2162, (sorry I forgot to quote) I don't think Mariah has/ had no right to be upset or disappointed. Of course she does. It was the extent and length, in my opinion, that I thought was a little overboard and judgmental.

I don't know if in reality and practice Meri and even Kody see their marriage as " vaild" -- I think they only pay lip service to it for other reasons-- the show, to not upset others in the family, for Kody's ego and self- image, etc. 

Meri seemed checked out even before the cf incident and so did Kody. And, this is my perception and opinion only, Kody was not fulfilling his marriage contract emotionally, spiritually, or physically with Meri for sometime. When it comes down to it, Kody and Meri's relationship is between them. Where Meri when wrong with Mariah was, number one, confiding in Mariah about her marriage and about the cf,  and number two, not being honest -- with herself, with Kody, and with Mariah after it all came out. 

Edited January 5, 2017 by Adiba
forgot to quote

[TurtlePower]

23 minutes ago, Roslyn said:

Oh I think it's safe to say that JO is delusional and has been for a very long time.  When the catfish stuff with Meri came out I remember skimming Nick's blog and understanding that she (JO) has been doing this for a very long time.  She found her "MO" with the handsome rich man as bait and the role of plucky sidekick for herself and just started to reel them in (so to speak)

I remember reading about the woman who was at the heart of the beginning of what we all now call "catfishing".  The original movie following Nev and his online relationship that turned out to be not just a lie, but a complex web of many lies all leading back to one lonely woman.  It was an interview with her husband, who struggled to understand what his wife had truly done who coined the phrase "Catfish" as we now understand it, even though this behavior dates back to the beginning of the internet I'm sure. She was outed on film for everyone to see, she openly admitted to doing what she did, but yet when the cameras were gone she fell back into her desire to go online and be someone else, it became an obsession with her.

I have also read where lots of people are shocked that someone can do this.  That one person can create so many multiple accounts over so many social media platforms and get away with harassment of so many people. Yes.  One person can do this.  I never doubted it because I saw it for myself.  Some years ago when my daughter was in high school she and her friends became the online target of a very mentally sick and delusional girl.  By the time my daughter finally told me what was going on (about 6 months into it) and sat me in front of her computer...well...I sat there with my mouth hanging open as she started showing me all the different "profiles" that this girl had created to a.) show love and support to herself online and b.) to harass others AND make it look like these girls were harassing HER online.  It was quickly clear to me that this was the same girl.  She couldn't hide her writing style.  In fact, when I read the crap that JO put on the batman blog I was shocked at the similarities in writing style.  Endless words saying nothing, bizarre sentence structure, gaslighting and then all the fake people created to comment and come in to make the real person look more real (?) I told her to screen shot and save everything, and she filled four large flashdrives of evidence.  She met face to face with the girl and her parents, calling her out and showing her evidence.  That got her a whole week before it just started up again.  In the end my daughter became a very good online computer detective and we were at the stage of taking everything to the police to try to get it to stop.  In the initial interview my daughter decided not to go any further.  She said that she needed to focus on her school work and she wanted her life back.  She deleted everything she had on those social media platforms, but she saved the evidence just in case (I still have it) and she moved on quite happily.  She is now a Junior in university and is happy and settled.  While visiting a friend over the holidays she learned that this girl is still living at home and still on the computer making up people and stories.  It's sad, but there are people out there like this.  I always wondered if JO doesn't have one of those rooms like you see on Law & Order shows.  Where the walls are covered with all the information she has compiled for her characters and her "marks" to keep the stories and photos and timelines straight.

I also saw Nev's film and watched "catfish" from the beginning, before it was even popular. Surprised me Meri said she'd never heard of a catfish--by that time the show was quite successful on MTV. If Meri really wants to know why people catfish, she really should start from the beginning of Nev's journey and watch his film and catfish episodes. Not that it matters now since she's moved on from it, but if she still wants to know. 

As prior law enforcement I like to dig deep and know this personality type. I suspect JO is much like these other catfishers. Lonely, socially awkward people who were bullied or made fun of, are shut-ins and/or had bad relationships and this is one way they feel "good" about themselves because they do not like who they are. Honestly, if they spent as much time on themselves as they do pretending to be someone else and hurting others, they might just have a chance at actually feeling good about themselves. 

[bichonblitz]

Ok, so I must be living under a rock! I had no idea Mariah was gay and I'm dying to know what the "banana pics" are? My imagination is running wild!

[ReadMeLattice]

58 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

It's easy to say that in this day and age (although, as has been pointed out hate crimes continue to persist and are likely to increase as the new administration encourages people to drop the filter of civility and express their hatred openly) but some of us oldsters were raised in an entirely different mindset. I went to Catholic schools and "those kind of people" were openly shunned.  I have overcome it but there are still those who cannot shake the deeply ingrained teachings of their families and churches.  

This was in the late 2000s/early 2010s and she was raised as a moderate and not religious (she's an atheist actually), so I think some people just choose to be hateful & bigoted all on their own. I understand it a little more from people who have been heavily indoctrinated and brainwashed, though that number seems to be decreasing thankfully (although as you say the bigots will likely come out of the woodwork for the next 4 years...)

8 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Ok, so I must be living under a rock! I had no idea Mariah was gay and I'm dying to know what the "banana pics" are? My imagination is running wild!

Meri took up close pics of her, um, pleasuring a banana and sent them to the catfish. 

[Roslyn]

4 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Ok, so I must be living under a rock! I had no idea Mariah was gay and I'm dying to know what the "banana pics" are? My imagination is running wild!

Fair warning...once you see the banana photo, you can NOT unsee it.  A google search of "meri catfish banana image" will bring it up, I believe it's the All About the Tea site that has it memorialized...

The premise behind the image was "Sam" and Meri were having a morning text conversation when they discovered they were both eating a banana at the same time.  While the catfish insists that the conversation was ONLY about them comparing the size of their bananas Meri does at one point state "I thought you said yours was big".  The catfish INSISTS this was only about the banana, but most people reading it saw it for what it was.  A playful innuendo where Meri was comparing her banana to "Sams" ....um.....well.  You know. Also remember at this time in their relationship "Sam" was openly insisting that "he" and Meri had physically and in person consummated their relationship.  If that were the case she would already know the exact size, and shape...of...you know.  This was a major mistake the catfish made when "he" posted that conversation and photos.

Two photos were sent from Meri.  One of her banana and the other of her....enjoying...her banana. 

You can NOT unsee that photo, trust me.

[Roslyn]

27 minutes ago, Runnergirl said:

I also saw Nev's film and watched "catfish" from the beginning, before it was even popular. Surprised me Meri said she'd never heard of a catfish--by that time the show was quite successful on MTV. If Meri really wants to know why people catfish, she really should start from the beginning of Nev's journey and watch his film and catfish episodes. Not that it matters now since she's moved on from it, but if she still wants to know. 

As prior law enforcement I like to dig deep and know this personality type. I suspect JO is much like these other catfishers. Lonely, socially awkward people who were bullied or made fun of, are shut-ins and/or had bad relationships and this is one way they feel "good" about themselves because they do not like who they are. Honestly, if they spent as much time on themselves as they do pretending to be someone else and hurting others, they might just have a chance at actually feeling good about themselves. 

Yes, trying to understand the "why" can pull you down the same path the catfish is on.  My daughter lost an entire summer to gathering evidence and trying to understand the whole thing.  We talked with another local family who was caught up with this girl when she was 13/14.  At that time it was mostly her in person attention seeking, texting that she was going to take pills, or had taken pills.  Texting people she knew, their parents and anyone she could get a phone number for.  Phone calls and "desperate" sounding messages on answering machines.  My daughter met her through other friends at school when she was 16-ish and by that time she was online, doing the same things.  According to the school (big brick wall dealing with them) this girl did or does have an illness that kept her home from school a lot.  But according to the girl she had many many illnesses with many treatments and death at any moment kind of things.  Yet anytime that anyone saw her, she never seemed or looked sick.  By the end we were wondering if she truly had any illness at all.  And after meeting her mother, well, she seemed to be in her own world as well.  When you read about people faking illness and getting a lot of sympathy etc you can see in this girl where it comes from.  Reading about JO's past victims and they all bring in the fact that illnesses and treatments were always part of the whole storyline as well.  The meeting between Cheryl and Meri brought up that "Sam" stated he had leukemia...and then the "Lindsay" persona had colon cancer. 

GGaaaa!!  This whole thing has me nuts sometimes.  There are so many lies to sift through, but there are tidbits of truth within them.  If it were just lies and lies it would be easy to walk away, because there is no substance.  It's those tidbits that keep people going, the pieces to the whole puzzle.  I honestly think that JO has us all as her "marks".  She has catfished America. 

[Galloway Cave]

12 hours ago, kentlady said:

So I have to ask.... who is the person who catfished Meri?  Is this person a man or a woman?  Did Meri really meet this person in person?  Did they have a physical relationship or not?  Who is Sam?

In Meri's thread in this forum, you can read about the whole situation. Several pages back in this thread I posted a link to the Bullshit Book Club, where the blogger reviewed the Catfish's book on the "affair". 

[purpleflowers]

Definitely thought the therapy session between Kody and Meri was interesting. I noticed in a talking head Kody claimed that the idea of pursuing in vitro fertilization with Meri was "foreign" to him! But he is the one who suggested it to her before the Robyn offer in the first or second season when the two of them went to Mexico! He is such a liar. Also, although many of us already suspected the perks of polygamy/one happy family theme was a sham for a while, it is still deceitful of them the way they portrayed themselves as soul mates with a solid relationship for a good part of the series run, and we now find out they have been in marital discord for about 12 years!! It looks like things are good for Janelle and him maybe because she has few expectations of him. If he is actually expected to be a fully participating partner, he is not interested. It seems the bloom is off the rose for Robyn even. Maybe things are okay with Christine for the time being as the balance has shifted and she may be a safe place for him to go right now. 

I thought the coming out scene of Mariah was authentic but I'm sure they suspected. Not sure why Christine's mom was involved. 

If the problems between Kody and Meri were the elephant in the room earlier, now it's definitely the true nature of Meri's  catfish encounter.  No matter how many details she is now sharing about it, it seems so disingenuous when she refuses to acknowledge the romantic nature of her feelings for and interactions with the "Sam" persona. Just friends, my foot!

[Sista Snarky]

Cheryl was also not telling the truth on the show when she made it seem as though   she had a spontaneous  aha! moment in 2013 when her kids said that was probably a woman she was speaking to & she  was like "say what?" but it just all made sense. 

Cheryl is aka "Jessica Justice" & "Jessica" has shared the entire story from soup to nuts about how things played out. It was via constant communication & investigation (after the "Fake Sam" love was gone) with a village of victim/strangers on the internet  that found common ground "friendship" & filled that void with  post "Fake Sam" mystery in the  aftermath. 

If ya can't come with the entire truth...don't come at all. JO is a liar. Meri & Cheryl are also  both lying & spinning lots of  details as well.

While Cheryl was in the loving "Fake Sam"  mode she also initially lied to some other victim of "Fake Sam" ...& Cheryl stated that she  did  meet "Fake Sam" because Cheryl was still protecting her fantasy relationship with "Fake Sam"  at the time.

Eventually (after they were both in the same after the love is gone boat) Cheryl came clean & admitted she lied about meeting "Fake Sam".  That created another similar "bond" of shared shitshow vicitim sisterhood between Cheryl & the  other  victim.

That  was much like the fake  bond Meri & Cheryl share now...as the framework partially  seems like mysterious "Fake Sam" was/is kinda lost at sea. They know in their minds that he'll never return...but still both seem to keep the porch light lit for "him" & enjoy communicating about this asshat Catfish.

Edited January 5, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[laurakaye]

5 hours ago, Runnergirl said:

I also saw Nev's film and watched "catfish" from the beginning, before it was even popular. Surprised me Meri said she'd never heard of a catfish--by that time the show was quite successful on MTV. If Meri really wants to know why people catfish, she really should start from the beginning of Nev's journey and watch his film and catfish episodes.

Oh, please.  I can't stand the way Meri plays all innocent, using finger quotes when she says the word "catfish," uses that halting/shoulder shrug/frowny-face combo when talking about the whole incident.  I don't buy it for a second.  She knew what it was, she just had no intention of admitting to herself that she was in the middle of her own catfishing scandal.  She still can barely admit it.

 

1 hour ago, Sista Snarky said:

Cheryl is aka "Jessica Justice" & "Jessica" has shared the entire story from soup to nuts about how things played out. It was via constant communication & investigation (after the "Fake Sam" love was gone) with a village of victim/strangers on the internet  that found common ground "friendship" & filled that void with  post "Fake Sam" mystery in the  aftermath. 

If ya can't come with the entire truth...don't come at all. JO is a liar. Meri & Cheryl are also  both lying & spinning lots of  details as well.

While Cheryl was in the loving "Fake Sam"  mode she also initially lied to some other victim of "Fake Sam" ...& Cheryl stated that she  did  meet "Fake Sam" because Cheryl was still protecting her fantasy relationship with "Fake Sam"  at the time.

Hold the phone...who/what is "Jessica Justice?"  So that Cheryl woman - who I actually thought might be one of the smarter, more well-adjusted people we've ever seen on this show (despite being catfished...I know, but this is the Brown family we're talking about) - was actively lying about Sam being real because she was protecting a fantasy relationship that didn't exist?!?  If I'm understanding this correctly, Meri and Cheryl have formed a friendship based on having the hots for a man that doesn't exist.  And they still expect him to come riding up on his white horse and take them away.  So in essence they were talking and giggling at dinner about having a crush on a make-believe person.  This is all so twisted and bizarre that I..........don't even know how to finish my sentence.

Edited January 5, 2017 by laurakaye

[Sista Snarky]

48 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Oh, please.  I can't stand the way Meri plays all innocent, using finger quotes when she says the word "catfish," uses that halting/shoulder shrug/frowny-face combo when talking about the whole incident.  I don't buy it for a second.  She knew what it was, she just had no intention of admitting to herself that she was in the middle of her own catfishing scandal.  She still can barely admit it.

 

Hold the phone...who/what is "Jessica Justice?"  So that Cheryl woman - who I actually thought might be one of the smarter, more well-adjusted people we've ever seen on this show (despite being catfished...I know, but this is the Brown family we're talking about) - was actively lying about Sam being real because she was protecting a fantasy relationship that didn't exist?!?  If I'm understanding this correctly, Meri and Cheryl have formed a friendship based on having the hots for a man that doesn't exist.  And they still expect him to come riding up on his white horse and take them away.  So in essence they were talking and giggling at dinner about having a crush on a make-believe person.  This is all so twisted and bizarre that I..........don't even know how to finish my sentence.

"Jessica Justice" was one of the Twitter handles Cheryl used on her post "Fake Sam" journey. 

Twitter eventually became the shitshow meeting place for so many other strange birds that decided to throw their hats in the ring...as trolls vs. JO as Notbatmanyet...protecting society from themselves as not to fall for the obvious fakery & foolery of "Fake Sam" & as cheerleaders for Meri. But ya know easy enough for  "Fake Sam" to also pretend to be a troll fighting for justice & release  some backstabbing drama behind the curtain. The groups often fought for power recognition etc. in their collective effort as "Fake Sam" was sprinkled in their core.

One of those strange people known as "Brooke" actually invested the time & energy to  catfish "Fake Sam" She   recorded & released  <gag>  phone sex <gag > between "Brooke" the pretend supporter of "Fake Sam" & "Fake Sam" The horror. 

They have various blogs devoted to Jackie. After "Jessica" (Cheryl) had one of her many Twitter accounts suspended...she shared her long very detailed  "victim" story on one of the blogs as "Jessica's story" ...months before she became  the "normal" "BFF with Meri.

 News to Meri...victim is the word the Twitter trolls & Cheryl use as they describe the people who fell madly deeply hopelessly & foolishly in love with the embarrassingly obvious   "Fake Sam"

Meri considers many of these crazy folks as...her internet friends.

Edited January 5, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[Alapaki]

12 minutes ago, Sista Snarky said:

News to Meri...victim is the word the Twitter trolls & Cher use as they describe the people who fell madly deeply hopelessly & foolishly in love with the embarrassingly obvious   "Fake Sam"

Mari wants to be all like:

[Kohola3]

Oh, geez, I refuse to waste one more brain cell on this clusterfuck.  All these people, fake and otherwise, just need to go away.

[LilWharveyGal]

TLC needs to fly us all to the same town so that we can console each other in person about being sucked into watching this nonsense.  Let's skip the faux therapy and head straight for the wine.

[CofCinci]

54 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

Oh, geez, I refuse to waste one more brain cell on this clusterfuck.  All these people, fake and otherwise, just need to go away.

I try to quit, but I get pulled back in.  Catfish is over.  Now I have to watch to see how family reacts to Mariah's lesbian reveal.  Then, once that story is put to bed --- they'll start showing Robyn and Kody's discord and separation.

[lettsjetts]

6 hours ago, Roslyn said:

Fair warning...once you see the banana photo, you can NOT unsee it.  A google search of "meri catfish banana image" will bring it up, I believe it's the All About the Tea site that has it memorialized...

 

There used to be a lot more ~scandalous photos on the catfish blog, I saw them when this whole thing exploded.  Although the banana picture spread like wildfire, there was a photo of Meri's short skirt/thighs, a photo of her in a robe clearly with no bra on, her legs and feet in a bubble bath and wearing a batman tank top. Do you think that a lawyer could have gotten these pictures removed?  If those other ones were removed then why not the banana one? 

[CofCinci]

1 hour ago, lettsjetts said:

There used to be a lot more ~scandalous photos on the catfish blog, I saw them when this whole thing exploded.  Although the banana picture spread like wildfire, there was a photo of Meri's short skirt/thighs, a photo of her in a robe clearly with no bra on, her legs and feet in a bubble bath and wearing a batman tank top. Do you think that a lawyer could have gotten these pictures removed?  If those other ones were removed then why not the banana one? 

 

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CQAID3YVEAAMTM8.jpg:large

[Armchair Critic]

19 hours ago, Sista Snarky said:

Nick O'Connor  has a blog that exposed Jackie as "Fake Sam" & many other alternate Catfish (Jackie Overton) personas.

I found his blog and then started following other links on it and fell into a rabbit hole. LOL

[Roslyn]

3 hours ago, lettsjetts said:

There used to be a lot more ~scandalous photos on the catfish blog, I saw them when this whole thing exploded.  Although the banana picture spread like wildfire, there was a photo of Meri's short skirt/thighs, a photo of her in a robe clearly with no bra on, her legs and feet in a bubble bath and wearing a batman tank top. Do you think that a lawyer could have gotten these pictures removed?  If those other ones were removed then why not the banana one? 

Yes, there are others, CofCinci posted above a link that has the "etched Sam" photo.  I think of them all (relatively tame graphic wise) the photo where she actually etched his name long enough and hard enough into the skin of her arm to make it that pronounced and red shows all too well that Meri was a willing participant in the relationship.  And that she wasn't necessarily thinking with the rational part of her brain either. It matches up with the groveling voice mails with "oh....Bbaaaby, I'm soooory" that she sent over and over.

[Armchair Critic]

5 hours ago, CofCinci said:

I try to quit, but I get pulled back in.  Catfish is over.  Now I have to watch to see how family reacts to Mariah's lesbian reveal.  Then, once that story is put to bed --- they'll start showing Robyn and Kody's discord and separation.

Same here. And I will admit if they did show Robyn & Kody breaking up I would be glued to the tv.

[NotEatingKale]

4 hours ago, CofCinci said:

 

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CQAID3YVEAAMTM8.jpg:large

Doesn't look like Meri's body imo. Jackie is grasping at straws here. 

[CofCinci]

Yeah, I was never convinced that the batman top or the robe was Meri. 

[MrSmith]

21 hours ago, lookeyloo said:

When my son came out, I gave him a hug and asked him did he still want meatloaf for dinner, as he had requested.  

And I'll bet this memory still makes him smile!

[VedaPierce]

On January 3, 2017 at 7:30 PM, Bitsy said:

I actually felt for Kody a little bit during that therapy session.  Meri was unhappy, Meri cheated on him online, Meri threatened to leave him, Meri treated him like crap because the catfish poisoned her mind against him, and then when it was all over and Meri had cried 2 seasons full of tears about her victimization, she still told Kody to stay away from her.

So now Meri and the therapist are informing Kody that it's time for him to do the work to fix his marriage and he's supposed to enthusiastically agree.    Kody didn't have much say in what happened, and now he's being told what to do.   And if he expresses any reluctance, then he's the jerk.

I think that would be hard for anyone, but particularly someone like Kody who needs to always feel like he's in charge and he's directing the course of his family.

I think the therapist ought to work with Kody on his feelings.  I think he's been trying to be the good guy by being sympathetic towards Meri and forgiving her, but there must be unexpressed anger there.

If Mariah is given time and space to process and dill with Meri's betrayal, Kody should also be respected to be allowed to come to terms with Meri's betrayal. It always astounds me that Meri's attitude is, 'well, I'm ready, now let's work on our relationship'. Doesn't work that way. Kind of similarly to when she kept Kody and all of us (ugh) hanging with the beyond boring storyline of will she or won't she persue invitro (shoot me now! If I never see another 'fertility problem' on reality tv again it will be too soon) and when she's FINALLY ready to grace us with an answer, Kody's moved on to #4, that he doesn't have to spend a fortune on to get knocked up. Boy, Meri really likes to dip into the family money jar as often as possible!

[ReadMeLattice]

@VedaPierce, I totally agree. Sometimes I feel like because we don't agree with polygamy we're not supposed to think he should have any feelings at all. Meri agreed to polygamy and this is a pattern for her. The fertility issue was a real problem, but she exacerbated it by dragging out every decision about it and shutting out everyone around her about it until it was basically too late and then went "oh I'm ready now be overjoyed." Same thing with the affair...There obviously were real problems in the relationship, but she ignored them for years and shut Kody out until she'd had a pretty lengthy affair, realized the person wasn't even a man, didn't want to talk about it for months more and THEN suddenly goes "I went on a weekend trip now I'm ready to be happy let's have an awesome marriage why aren't you thrilled." Same thing with the wet bar, the budget (her getting the same amount as people with SIX KIDS)-- I'll act passive aggressive and then suddenly unleash rage and pain and wonder why anyone is upset. 

Obviously the lady wants to be monogamous and hates her life...But being as manipulative about it as she is doesn't really help. Causing other people pain doesn't make your chosen relationship any less polygamous. I think she really hopes Kody will wake up one day and say "I hate those bitches and only love you" but there are real other women and kids involved. 

[Galloway Cave]

5 hours ago, CofCinci said:

Yeah, I was never convinced that the batman top or the robe was Meri. 

We will never know about the batman tank but come on, look at that orange skin in the robe! ;)

I'm trying to remember the other pics (since I bleached them out of my brain after seeing them). I think there was another pic of Meri in the robe where her face showed. The Batman stuff was laid out on her bed but it could have been anyone's bed.

[TurtlePower]

14 minutes ago, Galloway Cave said:

We will never know about the batman tank but come on, look at that orange skin in the robe! ;)

I'm trying to remember the other pics (since I bleached them out of my brain after seeing them). I think there was another pic of Meri in the robe where her face showed. The Batman stuff was laid out on her bed but it could have been anyone's bed.

Does kinda look like spray tan.........Meri being fair skinned might wanna check this page out--they even reference the "oompa loompa" appearance she has become known for. It can be avoided. 

http://www.elle.com/beauty/makeup-skin-care/news/a14938/pale-girls-guide-to-spray-tan/

[Alapaki]

1 hour ago, Lm2162 said:

Obviously the lady wants to be monogamous and hates her life...But being as manipulative about it as she is doesn't really help. Causing other people pain doesn't make your chosen relationship any less polygamous. I think she really hopes Kody will wake up one day and say "I hate those bitches and only love you" but there are real other women and kids involved. 

I guess the question, which is ultimately probably unanswerable since Meri will never be honest with us, is whether Meri just can't handle polygamy, or whether she just can't handle this polygamist.  

I'd imagine you have to have a certain personality in order to successfully be the first wife, since you're perpetually going to be "last year's model".  But maybe other polygamist husbands are more sensitive to that issue?

It's tough to separate Kody and Meri being terrible people from their being in a terrible relationship.

[Sista Snarky]

1 hour ago, Alapaki said:

I guess the question, which is ultimately probably unanswerable since Meri will never be honest with us, is whether Meri just can't handle polygamy, or whether she just can't handle this polygamist.  

I'd imagine you have to have a certain personality in order to successfully be the first wife, since you're perpetually going to be "last year's model".  But maybe other polygamist husbands are more sensitive to that issue?

It's tough to separate Kody and Meri being terrible people from their being in a terrible relationship.

I think the grass is easily greener in Meri's mind.

I remember Meri  outwardly swooning a few times with "I could be married to THAT"   about CEO & Drill  Sergeant Joe Darger (when Janelle was giving him major  side eye) because...carefully packed coolers...seating charts etc. 

It was all dreamy  flow charts...until the notion of share a kitchen the Darger rigid exercise program  & the fact (as the Darger stepson said) Papa Joe is big bald & intimidating.

Meri wouldn't be happy  as a Darger. Meri wouldn't have a big house or  TLC check in another polygamist family.

The struggles Meri & Kody started having 12 years ago might have had a little to do with the fact that they filed for bankruptcy. That meant no more charging credit cards to $85K.

Edited January 6, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[Sista Snarky]

41 minutes ago, Alapaki said:

I guess the question, which is ultimately probably unanswerable since Meri will never be honest with us, is whether Meri just can't handle polygamy, or whether she just can't handle this polygamist.  

I'd imagine you have to have a certain personality in order to successfully be the first wife, since you're perpetually going to be "last year's model".  But maybe other polygamist husbands are more sensitive to that issue?

It's tough to separate Kody and Meri being terrible people from their being in a terrible relationship.

I think the grass is easily greener in Meri's mind.

I remember Meri  outwardly swooning a few times with "I could be married to THAT"   about CEO & Drill  Sergeant Joe Darger (when Janelle was giving him major  side eye) because...carefully packed coolers...seating charts etc. 

It was all dreamy  flow charts...until the notion of share a kitchen the realization that Darger wives are on a rigid exercise program  & the fact (as the Darger stepson said) Papa Joe is big bald & intimidating. 

Edited January 6, 2017 by Sista Snarky

[lookeyloo]

Joe Darger sort of scared me.  I'd hate to be one of the wives who crossed him.  Hup two three four...